Mayna

Author(s): Bhadraguptasuri
Publisher: Mahavir Jain Aradhana Kendra Koba
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/008914/1

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giiO. zrI priyadarzana For Private And Personal Use Only

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Shri Mahavir Jain Aradhana Kendra siddhAMta mATe jhajhumelI athaNA. hasatA mukhe duHkha sahanArI caNA. navapadanI ArAdhikA mayAA. www.kobatirth.org paramAtmA RSabhadevanI upAsikA thAya. kuSTharogIne patirUpe svIkAranArI mayaNA. mayaNA zrI siddhacakra mahAyaMtranA divya prabhAvo pAmanArI mayaNA. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 700 kuSTharogIone nIrogI karanArI lekhaka zrI priyadarzana For Private And Personal Use Only maLyA. gurudevanI kRpApAtra caNA.

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punaH saMpAdana jJAnatIrtha - UMbA bIjI AvRtti vaizAkha vada-6, vi.saM. 2005, 15 me 2009 zrI borIja tIrthe samavasaraNa maMdira pratiSThA prasaMge mUlya DIlaksa : rU. 170.00 janarala : rU. 5.00 Arthikasojanya zeTha zrI niraMjana narottamabhAInA smaraNArthe ha. zeTha zrI narottamabhAI lAlabhAI parivAra prakAzaka zrI mahAvIra jaina ArAdhanA kendra AcArya zrI kelAsasAgarasUri jJAnamaMdira kobA, tA. ji. gAMdhInagara - 382007 phona naM. (079) 23276204, 23276252 email: gyanmandir@kobatirth.org website : www.kobatirth.org (c) zrI mahAvIra jaina ArAdhanA kendra, kobA vAka navaprabhAta pri. presa, amadAvAda phona naM.: 982papa98855 For Private And Personal Use Only

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pUjya AcArya bhagavaMta zrI vijayabhadraguptasUrIzvarajI zrAvaNa zuklA 12, vi.saM. 1989 ke dina pudagAma mahesANA (gujarAta) meM maNIbhAI evaM hIrAbahana ke kuladIpaka ke rUpa meM janme mUlacandabhAI, juhI kI kalI kI bhAMti khilatIkhulatI javAnI meM 18 barasa kI umra meM vi.saM. 2007, mahAvada 5 ke dina rANapura (saurASTra) meM AcArya zrImad vijayapremasUrIzvarajI mahArAjA ke karamakamaloM dvArA dIkSita hokara pU. bhuvanabhAnusUrIzvarajI ke ziSya bane. muni zrI bhadraguptavijayajI kI dIkSAjIvana ke prAraMbha kAla se hI adhyayana-adhyApana kI sudIrgha yAtrA prAraMbha ho cukI thI. 45 AgamoM ke saTIka adhyayanoparAMta dArzanika, bhAratIya evaM pAzcAtya tatvajJAna, kAvya-sAhitya vagairaha ke 'milasTona' pAra karatI huI vaha yAtrA sarjanAtmaka kSitija kI tarapha mur3a gaI. 'mahApaMthano yAtrI' se 20 sAla kI umra meM zuru huI lekhanayAtrA aMta samaya taka athaka evaM anavarata calI. taraha-taraha kA maulika sAhitya, tatvajJAna, vivecanA, dIrgha kathAe~, laghu kathAe~, kAvyagIta, patroM ke jariye svaccha va svastha mArgadarzana paraka sAhitya sarjana dvArA unakA jIvana saphara dina-ba-dina bharApUrA banA rahatA thA. premabharA ha~samukha svabhAva, prasanna va mRdu AMtara-bAhya vyaktitva evaM bahujana hitAya bahujana sukhAya pravRttiyA~ unake jIvana ke mahattvapUrNa aMgarUpa thI. saMgha-zAsana vizeSa karake yuvA pIr3hI, taruNa pIr3hI evaM zizu-saMsAra ke jIvana nirmANa kI prakiyA meM unheM rUci thI... aura isI se unheM saMtuSTi milatI thI. pravacana, vArtAlApa, saMskAra zibira, jApa-dhyAna, anuSThAna evaM paramAtma bhakti ke viziSTa AyojanoM ke mAdhyama se unakA sahiSNu vyaktitva bhI utanA hI unnata evaM ujjvala banA rahA. pUjyazrI jAnane yogya vyaktitva va mahasUsa karane yogya astitva se sarAbora the. kolhApura meM tA. 4-5-1987 ke dina gurudeva ne unheM AcArya pada se vibhUSita kiyA. jIvana ke aMta samaya meM lambe arase taka ve aneka vyAdhiyoM kA sAmanA karate hue aura aise meM bhI satata sAhitya sarjana karate hue dinAMka 19-11-1999 ko zyAmala, ahamadAbAda meM kAladharma ko prApta hue. For Private And Personal Use Only

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neha-sevA ane samarpaNanI mUrtisamAM azokabhAI kApaDiyAne devIbena kApaDiyAne dharmalAbha" sAthe... For Private And Personal Use Only

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nivedana ane saMvedana zrIpAla-mayaNAnI kathA sarvaprathama vi. saM. 1428mAM prAkRta bhASAmAM lakhAI hatI. tenA lekhaka hatA AcAryapravarazrI ratnazekharasUrijI. tyAra pachI vi. saM. 1514mAM saMskRta bhASAmAM zrIpAla-mayaNAnuM caritra lakhyuM hatuM paMDitazrI satyarAja gaNivare. A baMne caritra-graMtho vartamAnamAM upalabdha che. A hRdayaMgama pavitra kathA samagra jaina saMghamAM suparicita che. prativarSa caitra mahinAnI ane Aso mahinAnI zAzvatu AyaMbila-oLInA divasomAM lagabhaga pUjya sAdhu-sAdhvIjI A kathA saMghane saMbhaLAvatA hoya che. A kathA rAsa (kAvya) rUpe paNa mahopAdhyAyazrI vinavijayajI tathA mahopAdhyAya zrI yazovijayajIe racelI che. 'zrIpAlarAsa'nA nAme te prasiddha che. (vikramanI aDhAramI sadI, 24 DhALa = 748 gAthA.) meM paNa anekavAra pravacanomAM zrotAone A kathA saMbhaLAvelI che. mane khUba gamatI kathA che. A kathA kahetAM kahetAM ghaNI vAra anupama saMvedano meM anubhavelAM che. ghaNI vAra zrIpAla-mayaNA sAthe tAdAtmya sadhAI gayeluM che. eTale mULa caritramAM je keTalIka ghaTanAo nathI vAMcavA maLatI evI paNa ghaNI ghaTanAo, prasaMgo... je mArA bhAvAlokamAM udbhAsita thayA, te meM A kathAmAM lakhyA che... jyAM sudhI mArI samaja ane buddhino vyApa che tyAM sudhI meM mayaNA ane zrIpAlanA vyaktitvane vizeSarUpe ajavALavAno prayAsa karyo che. khAsa karIne 'mayaNA'nA apUrva nArItvane, satItvane, enA satvane, ojasane... zraddhAne ane jJAnane navAjavA ughata banyo chuM. mArI evI samajaNa che ke UrminI saccAIno raNako ane kalpanAnI maulikattA zabdomAM avatare to ja sahRdaya manuSyane sparze. ane jeTaluM e vAcakanA hRdayamAM utare che eTaluM ja yathArtha nIvaDe che. vAta enI e ja hoya che, paNa kahevAnA aMdAja judA-judA hoi zake che. e aMdAjone lakSamAM rAkhI A kathA tame vAMcazo to tame divya saMvedano anubhavazo. A kathA che! eTale emAM vividha rasone puSTa karavA ja paDe. jethI vAcakanA hRdayane bAMdhI rAkhI zakAya. For Private And Personal Use Only

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A kathA lakhavAmAM zArIrika asvasthatAnAM ghaNAM vighno AvyAM. lagabhaga 150 peja lakhyA pachI eka mahinA sudhI ekeya peja lakhAyuM na hatuM ane 'have kadAca A kathA huM pUrI nahIM lakhI zakuM.' evI zaMkA paNa manamAM jAgI gaI hatI... paraMtu zrI zaMkhezvara pArzvanAtha bhagavaMtanI kRpAthI, gurudevonA aciMtya anugrahathI, sahavartI aMtevAsI baMne munivaro padmaratna ane bhadrabAhunI apAra hUMphathI, amArA zayyAtara suzrAvaka azokabhAI kApaDiyAdevIbena kApaDiyA parivAranI satata suzrUSAbhakti ane kALajIthI... DaoNkTaronI sAvadhAnIbharI sevAthI... ane AvA aneka paribaLonA kAraNe A vArtA pUrNa thaI... sArI rIte lakhAI gaI! chatAM ghaNI truTIo rahI gaI haze... kyAMka punarukti-doSa paNa dekhAze... paraMtu tame mane daragujara karajo. kAraNa ke huM to mArA manane jJAnAnaMdamAM ramatuM rAkhavA ja lakhuM chuM... jeTaluM tamane sAruM lAge teTaluM ja grahaNa karajo... A pustakano ekAda zabda, ekAda vAkya... ke ekAda prasaMga paNa tamArA AtmavikAsamAM sahAyaka banaze to mane ghaNo AnaMda thaze. jo ke lakhatAM lakhatAM meM khUba ja AMtara prasannatA meLavI ja che. mArA rugNa dehamAM mAruM mana sadaiva prasanna rahe, mAro AtmabhAva nirmaLa rahe... te mATe huM jhajhumI rahelo chuM. sahu jIvo zAMti pAmo... zAMti pAmo... A mArI AMtara bhAvanA che. A pustakanAM badhAM ja phAInala prUpho, viduSI mahAsatI padmAbAIe khUba ja kALajI ne AtmIyabhAve joI ApyAM che... A prasaMge temane kRtajJabhAve yAda karUM chuM. jinAjJAnuM ullaMghana na thAya tevI kALajI rAkhI che, chatAM chadmastha chuM... kyAMka bhUla thaI gaI hoya to micchAmi dukkaDaM... amadAvAda 7-10-98 cutajUni For Private And Personal Use Only

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prANAThIya pUjya AcArya zrI vijayabhadraguptasUrijI mahArAja (zrI priyadarzana) dvArA likhita ane vizvakalyANa prakAzana mahesANAthI prakAzita sAhitya jaina samAjamAM ja nahIM paraMtu jainetara lokomAM paNa khUba ja utsukatA sAthe vaMcAtu lokapriya sAhitya che. pUjyazrI 19 navembara 1999nA roja amadAvAdamAM kALadharma pAmyA pachI vizvakalyANa prakAzana TrasTanuM visarjana karI teozrInA prakAzanonuM puna:prakAzana baMdha karavAnA nirNayanI vAta sAMbhaLIne amArA TrasTIone bhAvanA thaI ke pUjya AcAryazrInuM utkRSTa sAhitya janasamudAyane hameMzA maLatuM rahe te mATe kaIka karavuM joIe e Azaya sAthe vizvakalyANa prakAzananA TrasTamaMDaLane A vAta pUjya rASTrasaMta AcArya zrI padmasAgarasUrijInI saMmati pUrvaka jaNAvI. baMne pUjya AcAryonI parasparanI maitrI ghaniSTha hatI. aMtima divasomAM divaMgata AcAryazrIe rASTrasaMta AcAryazrIne maLavAnI icchA vyakta karI hatI. pUjyazrIe A kArya mATe vyakti, vyaktitva ane kRtitvanA AdhAre potAnI saMmati prerakabaLa rupe ApI. teozrInA AzIrvAda pAmIne kobAtIrthanA TrasTIoe A kAryane AgaLa dhapAvavA vizvakalyANa prakAzana TrasTanI pAse prastAva mukyo. vizvakalyANa prakAzana TrasTanA TrasTIoe paNa kobA tIrthanA TrasTIonI divaMgata AcAryazrI priyadarzananA pracAra-prasAranI utkRSTa bhAvanAne dhyAnamAM laI zrI mahAvIra jaina ArAdhanA kendra-kobAtIrthane potAnA TrasTa dvArA prakAzita pustakonA puna:prakAzananA badhAja adhikAro saharSa soMpI dIdhA. te pachI zrI mahAvIra jaina ArAdhanA kendra saMsthAnA zrutasaritA (jaina bukasTola)nA mAdhyamathI zrI priyadarzananA lokapriya pustakonuM vitaraNa jAhera janatAnA hitamAM cAlu karyuM. zrIpriyadarzananA anupalabdha sAhityanA punaHprakAzana karavAnI zRMkhalAmAM prastuta mayaNA graMthanuM punaH prakAzana karIne vAcakone upalabdha karAvI rahyA chIe. A sAhitya sarva-sulabha bane e mATe jJAnasAranA punaH prakAzanathI laI vadhu For Private And Personal Use Only

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kImatavALI DIlaksa AvRtti ke je pAkA pUMThAnI ane UMcA jAtanA kAgaLa para chapAela hoya che, ane ochI kImatavALI sAdI-janarala AvRtti ke je kAcA pUMThAvALI ane sAmAnya kAgaLa upara chapAelI hoya che, ema be prakAranI AvRttio chApavAnuM cAlu karyuM che. zeTha zrI saMvegabhAI lAlabhAInA saujanyathI A prakAzana mATe zeTha zrI niraMjana narottamabhAInA smaraNArthe ha. zeTha zrI narottamabhAI lAlabhAI parivAra taraphathI je udAra Arthika sahayoga prApta thayo che e badala amo samagra zeThazrI narottamabhAI lAlabhAI parivAranA RNI chIe tathA teonI hArdika anumodanA karIe chIe. AzA che ke bhaviSyamAM paNa teozrI taraphathI Avo ja udAra sahayoga maLato raheze. A AvRttinuM prUphariDIMga karI ApanAra zrI jagadIzabhAI prajApati, zaileSabhAI zAha tathA phAInala dUpha karI ApavAmAM saMsthAnA paMDitavarya zrI manojabhAI jena, zrI AziSabhAI zAhano ane A pustakanA suMdara kampojhIMga tathA seTIMga karI ApavA badala saMsthAnA kayUTara vibhAgamAM kAryarata zrI ketanabhAI zAha tathA zrI saMjayabhAI gurjara temaja zrI mayurabhAI zAhano ame hRdaya pUrvaka AbhAra mAnIe chIe. Apane amAro namra anurodha che ke tamArA mitro ane svajanomAM A preraNAdAyI sAhityanI prabhAvanA karo. zrutajJAnanA pracAra-prasAra mATe apAyeluM nAnakaDu yogadAna Apane lAbhadAyaka thaze. anna, navA kalevara tathA sajjA sAthenuM prastuta pustaka ApanI jIvanayAtrAno mArga prazasta karavAmAM nimitta bane ane viSamatAomAM samarasatAno lAbha karAve evI zubha kAmanAo. punaH prakAzana vakhate graMthakArazrInA Azaya tathA jinAjJA viruddhanI kAMI kSati rahI gaI hoya to micchAmi dukkaDam. sujJone dhyAna AkRSTa karavA vinaMtI. TrasTIgaNa zrI mahAvIra jaina ArAdhanA kendra For Private And Personal Use Only

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prabhAtano samaya hato. ujjayinI nagarInA rAjapatha para eka kSINakAya strI dhIme pagale cAlI rahI hatI. teno deha kuza hato. tenA gulAbI caherA para samayanI karacalIo UpasI AvI hatI. tenAM vastro sAdAM hatAM. chatAM zveta vastromAM te jAjaramAna lAgatI hatI. tenA deha para suvarNa na hatuM. te nArI prauDhA lAgatI hatI. tenI cAlamAM Dolana na hatuM, paraMtu nayanomAM jyoti hatI, mastaka para dRDhatA hatI. cAlamAM gAMbhIrya hatuM. tyAM acAnaka sAmethI cAlyA AvatA eka yugale e strIne joI. yuvake yuvatIno hAtha dabAvI UbhI rAkhI. yuvakanI AMkho vikasvara thaI... mukha para harSa chavA... te doDyo. pAchaLa yuvatI paNa doDI... yuvaka pelI strInAM caraNomAM ALoTI paDyo... "mA! mArI mA!" vatsa tuM?" e strI mUMjhAI gaI, "vatsa! meM tane..." na oLakhyo, mA? huM tAro putra!' beTA zrIpAla!' e proDha strIe putrane be hAthe Ubho karyo... putra mAtAnI chAtIe coMTI paDyo. harSanAM anarAdhAra AMsuothI mAtAe putranA mastakane bhIMjavI nAMkhyuM.. be hAthe putrane aLago karI, enA khabhe be hAtha mUkI mAtA putrane navA abhinava rUpane joI rahI. paDachaMda ane mAMsala deha! baMkI garadana para jhUmatAM kALAM julaphA.. madhura svara.. kAmadevane paNa zarasaMdhAna karavAnuM mana thAya tevuM bhavya lalATa! AMkhomAM hajAra hIrAonuM teja! "beTA, A camatkAra sAco che? ke huM svapna jouM chuM?' "mA, tuM svapna nathI jotI... vAstavikatA jue che. A camatkAra tArI mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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A putravadhUno che!' haju to e prauDhA strI yuvatI sAme jue, te pahelAM yuvatI e strInAM caraNomAM namI paDI... prauDhAe potAnI e putravadhUne be hAthe UbhI karI ne enI sAme joI rahI. mAtAjI, tamArA A suputra nIrogI thayA, te prabhAva paramAtmA RSabhadevano che ane gurudevazrI municandrasUrijIno che.' mA, e badhI vAto ghare gayA pachI karIzuM... paraMtu tAruM caMdra jevuM mukha kema vilAI gayuM? mAre to tAro nAgapAza jevo kezakalApa jovo hato.. kamaLapuSpanA raMga jevI tArI dehayaSTi nIrakhavI hatI. nehabharyA tArA hAsyathI varSono mAro thAka utArI nAMkhavo hato..." "vatsa, e badhI vAto lAMbI che. vAto saMgharSanI che.. AMtarabAhya viknonI che... e badhI vAto saMbhaLAvIza nirAMte.. paNa e pahelAM mAre, tane devakumAra jevo rUparUpano aMbAra banAvanArI mArI A putravadhUne oLakhavAnI che. eno paricaya pAmavAno che. eNe kevI rIte tane nIrogI karyo... vagere badhuM ja jANavuM che!" mAtAjI, atyAre to ApaNe ghare jaIe. tamane khUba vizrAmanI jarUra che. snAna... bhojanAdithI nivRtta thayA pachI badhI vAto karIzuM! have to Apane ahIM ja rahevAnuM che." e prauDhA hatI rANI kamalaprabhA. aMgadezanA caMpAnagarInA rAjA siharathanI vidhavA rANI. pelo yuvAna hato. zrIpAla. rAjakumAra zrIpAla! rANI kamalaprabhAno lADakavAyo kumAra! chelle chelle putrane kuSTharogathI gherAyelo joyo hato. Aje ene nIrogI ane rUpavAna joyo! ghaNAM varSo saMgharSamAM pasAra thayAM hatAM. chevaTe kauzAmbInagaramAM eka viziSTa jJAnI vimalaguNasUri maLyA. temaNe kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : he devI, tArA kuSTharogI patrane mAlavapatinI putrI paraNI che. patnInA kahevAthI siddhacakranI ArAdhanA karI. tethI tAro putra nIrogI thayo che. teno prabaLa puNyodaya pragaTyo che! tArA e puNyazALI patra bhaviSyamAM samrATa rAjA thaze! pitAnuM rAja pAchuM meLavaze." mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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jJAnI muninuM kathana sAMbhaLIne kamalaprabhA ujjayinImAM AvI ane AvatAM ja putra ane putravadhU nagaranA rAjamArga para maLI gayAM. mayaNA ane zrIpAla, kamalaprabhAne laI nagaranI bahAra dazapuranA mArga para AvelA potAnA ghare AvyAM. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir ghara nAnuM hatuM paNa suMdara ane sughaDa hatuM. AMgaNAmAM khaDaka korIne ane moTA paththaro goThavIne suMdara bagIco banAvavAmAM Avyo hato. sapATa jamIna para suzobhita makAna UbheluM hatuM. tenA pravezadvAre pahoMcavA mATe naisargika lAge tevAM pagathiyAM hatAM. makAnanI cotarapha borasallI, AMbA ane arIThAnAM vRkSo hatAM. lAla raMganAM naLiyAMnA chAparAvALuM makAna aMdara ane bahArathI AchA lIlA raMgathI raMgeluM hatuM. makAnamAM pravezatAM pahelAM sarasa majAnI agAsI hatI. agAsInA kaTheDAonI pAse vyavasthita rIte kUMDAM goThavelAM hatAM. vaccovaca netaranAM ane lAkaDAnAM sukhAsano goThavAyelAM hatAM. dIvAnakhaMDamAM sAdAI ane sughaDatA dekhAtI hatI. jamIna para ArasanI pharasa ekadama cakacakata hatI. khaMDanuM badhuM ja rAcaracIluM saphAIbaMdha hatuM. jotAM ema ja lAge ke A navA makAnamAM mayaNA ane zrIpAla Aje ja rahevA AvyAM haze. chAparAnI nIce chatamAM karelo raMga paNa tAjo ja karyo hoya teTalI cokhkhI chata lAgatI hatI. A makAna ujjayinInA nagarazreSThI ane AcAryazrI municaMdranA parama bhakta dharmapAlanuM hatuM. gurudevanA nirdezathI temaNe mayaNA-zrIpAlane A makAna rahevA ApyuM hatuM. caNA mAtA, putra ane putravadhU makAnamAM pravezyAM. 'mAtAjI, sarvaprathama Apa lAMbI yAtrAno thAka utAravA snAnagharamAM jAo. zAMtithI snAna karo ane ApanA mATe A navAM vastro mUkuM chuM, te paherI lejo. huM jANuM chuM ke Apa vidhavA rANI cho!' kaMI ja bolyA vinA kamalaprabhA vastro laI snAnagharamAM dAkhala thaI gaI. mayaNA rasoIgharamAM cAlI gaI ane zrIpAla (uMbara2ANo) dIvAnakhaMDamAM eka lAMbA sukhAsana para beTho. teNe ghaNA samaya pachI mAne joI hatI. tenuM hRdaya harSathI romAMcita hatuM. te potAno samagra vRttAMta mAne kahevA mATe tatpara banyo hato. mayaNA paNa bhojana banAvatAM A ja vAta vicAratI For Private And Personal Use Only

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hatI ke, "mArI sAsu badhI ja vAta pUchaze, ne huM badhI ja vAta karIza." kSiprA nadInA taTathI dUra, mayaNA-zrIpAlanA baMgalI jevA ghara para savArano taDako chavAyo hato. gharanA ugamaNA khUNe UgelI mahAkAya rAyaNanAM lIlAMchama pAMdaDAMnI bhItaramAMthI jANe sonuM varasatuM hoya tema rezamanA tAMtaNA jevAM kiraNo saratAM hatAM ane enuM teja baMgalInI agAsImAM goLa cakatAmAM ke AkAravihoNA pejamAM phelAtuM hatuM. kSiprA nadI parathI Avato dhImo ThaMDo pavana makAnanI bArImAM laTakatA paDadAne cheDato hato. taDakAnI sAthe baMgalInI AsapAsa banAvelI phUlanI kyArIomAMthI bhInI khubU UbharAtI hatI. pavananA jhokA sAthe e phorama aMdara AvatI hatI. kamalaprabhA nAnagRhanI bahAra AvI. teNe suMdara zveta vastro paheryA hatAM. tenA zarIramAM skUrti AvI hatI. enA zarIramAMthI teja, AbhA, prakAza, mAdhurya, komaLatA ane saurabhanuM akhaMDa jharaNuM vahI rahyuM hatuM. enI dehayaSTi jANe koI divya kArIgare hIrAonA akhaMDa TukaDAo kalAtmaka rIte khodIne banAvI hatI. AvuM rUpa, ATaluM sauSThava ane ATalI apUrvatA joIne mayaNA stabdha thaI gaI. zrIpAla to TakaTakI lagAvIne joI rahyo. ane mAtAne vaLagI paDyo. mA! mArI mA! have tuM jevI hatI... meM tane joI hatI, tevI lAge have mA-putra pachI khUba vAto karajo, pahelAM ApaNe mAtAjIne bhojana karAvIe!" mayaNAe zrIpAlane kahyuM. nA, nA, ApaNe traNeya sAthe ja bhojana karIzuM. Aje ghaNAM varSo pachI huM mArA lADalAne bhojana karAvIza.' kamarAmAM khAnuM ajavALuM relAtuM hatuM. eka tarapha kASThAsana hatuM. bIjI tarapha palaMga hato. eka bhIMta pAse kotaraNI karelI phremamAM maDhelA arIsAvALuM suMdara Tebala paDeluM hatuM. mayaNAe kamalaprabhAne kotaraNI karelA pAyAvALA ane makhamalanI beThakavALA sukhAsana para besADI. 'beTI! tuM mAlavapatinI rAjakumArI ane A mAro putra kuSTharogathI gherAyelo virUpa caherAvALo putra... A ku-yoga kevI rIte thayo? e to mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #14
thayo, paNa mAro putra nIrogI kevI rIte thayo? vagere badho ja vRttAMta mAre tamArA baMnenA mukhe sAMbhaLavo che." "mA, mAre tAro paNa guptavAsano saMgharSamaya vRttAMta sAMbhaLavo che!' zrIpAle kahyuM. pahelAM tamAro vRttAMta pachI mAro! barAbara?' kamalaprabhAnA mukha para ghaNAM varSo pachI smita ramavA mAMDayuM.. mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #15
mAlava deza eTale pRthvI parano bagIco. khUba khUba vRkSo. vRkSo ane vanarAjIthI bharyAbharyA jaMgalo. jaMgalonA suMdara bagIcA. DuMgaro ane khINo. khINonI godamAM ramatiyALa banI vAMkIcUkI pharatI nadIo. vizALa ane suMdara taLAvo; mIThAM jaLathI bharelAM. ane DuMgaro ya kevA mohabharyA ne AkarSaka! DuMgarAomAM bharIbharI hariyALI. kudarate e dharatI para vipula sauMdarya veryuM hatuM. dharatI paranAM vanya pazuonI jema nijAnaMde masta banI tyAMnI prajAe prakRtinA khoLe UcharI, saMskRtine mANI, pravRttimaya jIvana jIvavAnI kaLA keLavI hatI. mAlavanI dharatI para teo sukhI, samRddha ane dhArmika banIne jIvana jIvatA hatA. parasparanA sAtha-sahakArathI dezanI samRddhimAM oNra vadhAro thavA pAmyo hato. vaLI e dharatI evI to phaLadrupa hatI ke jyAM koI paththara sudhdhAM nAMkhe to e paththara paNa enI dharatInI hUMpha ane uSmAmAM dhanadhAnya ane phaLadrupa pAka banI UgI nIkaLe; AvuM e deza mATe kahevAtuM "duniyAmAM Avo koI deza haze ke kema?' evuM e deza mATe kahevAtuM. tyAM paga mUkanArane e dharatInuM evuM to AkarSaNa jAgatuM ke pachI e tyAMthI potAno paga khaseDavA vahelo taiyAra na thato. bhAratanI prajAmAM A dezanI prajAnI birAdarI ane bahAdurInI vAtonA paDaghA paDatA rahetA. e dharatInI udyamI prajAnI koIneya IrSyA Ave, evuM tyAMnuM jIvana hatuM. dezanuM pATanagara hatuM ujjayinI. kSiprA nadInA kinAre vaseluM raziyAmaNuM pATanagara. e dezamAM garIba jevuM koI dekhAtuM ja nahIM. koInI jarA sarakhI bUrI hAlata thatI to bIjAo enI vahAre doDI jatA. paDatAne pAcho Ubho karatA. e samAja sAcA arthamAM dhArmika samAja hato. e kALe mAlavamAM mukhya be dharmo prajAmAM paLAtA hatA - jaina dharma ane zaiva dharma, rAjamahelathI mAMDIne sAmAnya mANasanA gharamAM A be dharmonA mayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #16
kriyAkAMDa ane AcAro jovA maLatA hatA. kSiprA nadInA DAbI taraphanA taTa para mAlava sAmrAjyanI rAjadhAnI ujjayinI vaselI hatI. kuzaLa zilpIoe A nagarIne manorama ane suMdara banAvelI hatI. nagarInI cAre bAju moTI ajeya dIvAlo banAvelI hatI. uttara ane pUrva dizA tarapha durlaMdhya parvatazreNIo hatI. te dakSiNa tarapha dUra dUra phelAyelI hatI. rAjadhAnInAM jala-vAyu svArathyakara hatAM. sthAne sthAne garama pANInA kuMDa AvelAM hatA. ujjayinInI zobhA alaukika hatI ane eno killo durladhya hato. rAjamahAlayamAM parApUrvathI cAlI AvatI aDhaLaka saMpatti hatI. nagarInI pUrva dizAmAM eka vizALa zaiva maMdira ane zaiva dharmanA Azrama AvelAM hatAM. jyAre pazcima dizAmAM bhagavAna RSabhadevano gaganacuMbI bhavya prAsAda zobhato hato ane enI pArsanA savrata-udyAnamAM jainAcArya zrI municandra aneka zramaNonI sAthe birAjamAna hatA. ujjayinInI aDadhA bhAganI prajA zaiva dharmane anusaranArI hatI, aDadhI prajA jaina dharmane mAnanArI hatI. mAlavapati mahArAjA prajApAla, baMne dharmo pratye samabhAva dhAraNa karatA hatA. baMne dharmanA sAdhuono Adara karatA hatA. paraMtu eka rANI saubhAgyasuMdarI zaiva dharmane daDhatAthI mAnatI hatI. bIjI rANI rUpasuMdarI jaina dharmanI parama upAsikA hatI. mayaNAe rANI kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : "mAtezvarI, mArI mAtAe mArA dhArmika abhyAsa mATe ane dhArmika saMskaraNa mATe "subuddhi' nAmanA jaina vidvAna paMDitane niyukta karyA hatA. jyAre rANI saubhAgyasuMdarIe potAnI putrI surasuMdarI mATe "zivabhUti' nAmanA zaivadharmI paMDitane niyukta karyA hatA. amArA pitA mahArAjA prajApAle amane dharmapAlananA viSayamAM pUrNa svataMtratA ApelI hatI. paraMtu rAjakumArIo mATe Avazyaka nRtya, gIta, vAdana, citrakaLA Adi 64 kaLAo zIkhavA, temano dRDha Agraha hato ane ame baMne baheno 64 kaLAomAM nipuNa banI." "he mahAdevI!' mayaNA kamalaprabhAne kahI rahI hatI. amAro rAjamahela to Ape joyo nathI! jo ke Apa paNa caMpAnagarInA rAjamahelamAM vasanArAM rAjarANI cho. chatAM amAro ujjayinIno rAjamahela magadha, vatsa, kozala, avanti Adi dezomAM prazaMsAya che! mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #17
amAro rAjamahela "nIlapadma prAsAdanA nAme prasiddha che. mahelanI bahAranI bhIMto para ane mahelanI pharasa para matsya dezanA camakIlA paththaro jaDelA che. dIvAlo para uparathI nIce sudhI vividha raMganAM ratno jaDAyelAM che. bahAranA medAnathI mahela sudhI suMdara pula banelo che. e pulanI baMne bAju svarNa-daMDa lAgelA che. nIla-padma sarovaranuM pANI kharekhara, nIlamaNinI samAna svaccha ane ujvala che. ane emAM moTAM moTAM nIlakamala sadeva khIlelAM rahe che. sarovaranI vacce kRtrima TApu banelA che. e TApuo para haMsa, cakravAka, baka, sAraMga.... vagere pazu-pakSIonA kRtrima AvAsa banAvavAmAM AvyA che. e pakSIono kalarava, nirmaLa jaLamAM nIla kamalonI zobhA ane enA para paDatI mahelanI kaMpatI parachAI.. (paDachAyo) apUrva sauMdaryanuM darzana karAve che. he mAtA, kyAreka zubha caMdranI jyusnAmAM, zveta vastro paridhAna karI, sarovaranA eka svaccha zubhra zilAkhaMDa para huM besI jatI. huM bAhya jagatane bhUlI jatI. mane bhagavAna RSabhadevanI nayanaramya mUrti dRSTigocara thatI... mAruM mana prabhunA dhyAnamAM lIna thaI jatuM. mArA adharo kaMpavA lAgatA ane prabhunI stavanA pariphuTa thatI... huM dhImA... madhura svare... AMkho baMdha karIne gAtI rahetI. mane prabhu RSabhadevanuM sAMnidhya prApta thatuM. mArA romaroma vikasvara thaI jatA. mArI AMkho premAzruthI chalachalI jatI... AvA madhura anubhavo aneka vAra mane thayAM che. he mAtA! mAro trAtA, bhrAtA, mAtA ne sarvasva prabhu RSabhadeva che! mahAdevI, amArA rAjamahelanI khoTI prazaMsA nathI karatI. kharekhara, A yugamAM A mahela naMdanavananI hoDa kare che! tyAMnI saMpadA, saMpannatA, vibhUti ane sajAvaTa joIne moTA samrATone IrSyA thAya che! Akho mahela zvetA saMgemaramarano banelo che. emAM sAta bhavya khaMDa che ane sAta vizALa prAMgaNa che. sahuthI UMcI aTTAlikA para jaDelo svarNakaLaza, prabhAtanA sonerI taDakAmAM khUba camake che ane dUra dUra sudhI zobhAno vistAra kare che. mahela khUba vizALa che. enA dareka kAronA kalAtmaka toraNa para hamezAM saMdhyA samaye jUI, caMpo, caMpaka, mAlatI ane zatadalanI mALAo suMdara rIte TIMgADavAmAM Ave che. mahelanI bahAranI bhIMtanA gokhalAomAM popaTa, sArikA, mayUra, haMsa, sArasa, cittara Adi pakSIo nivAsa kare che. mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #18
'mahelanA vizALa prAMgaNamAM saMdhyApUrve sugaMdhita jala chAMTavAmAM Ave che. moTA moTA samrATa A rAjamahelanI zobhA ekAda vAra jovA lAlAyita rahe che. mAtAjI, amane rAja kumArIone rAjamahelanA koI paNa bhAgamAM javAnI - pharavAnI chUTa hatI. paraMtu mane to mArA ane mArI mAtAnA khaMDamAM ja rahevAnuM vadhAre gamatuM hatuM. kAraNa ke mane jaina dharmanuM adhyayana karAvanAra mArA pUjya paMDita "subuddhi" mArA khaMDamAM ja mane bhaNAvatA hatA!' beTI!' kamalaprabhAe pUchyuM. paMDitajI pAse tuM zuM zuM bhaNI?' 'temaNe mane sAcuM paramAtmasvarUpa, sAcuM gurusvarUpa ane sAcuM dharmasvarUpa samajAvyuM. AtmAnA astitvane tarkathI ane zAstrothI siddha karyuM. AtmAnI ajarA-amaratA samajAvI. AtmAnI svabhAva-vibhAvadazA samajAvI. vibhAvadazAnAM kAraNabhUta ATha karmonuM jJAna ApyuM. karmono baMdha, karmono udaya, karmonuM saMkramaNa, karmonI sattA Adi vistArathI karmonuM svarUpa samajAvyuM. karmono nAza karanAra dharmanuM svarUpa samajAvyuM. gRhastha dharma samajAvyo, sAdhudharma samajAvyo! cAra gatinuM svarUpa batAvyuM. devagati, narakzati, tiryaMcagati ane manuSyagatinAM sukha-duHkha samajAvyAM." "utpAda-vyaya ane dhrauvyanI tripadI samajAvI. naigama-saMgraha-vyavahAra Adi sAta nayanuM jJAna ApyuM. nizcayanaya ane vyavahAranaya samajAvyo. ka saptabhaMgI sAta bhaMga samajAvyA. A cAra pramANa - cAra nikSepa samajAvyA. kharekhara paMDitajIe mane ghaNuM ghaNuM jaNAvyuM. jaina dharma pratyenI mArI zraddhAne avihaDa karI dIdhI. temAMya ATha karmonA baMdha, udaya, udIraNA ane sattAnI vAta to addabhuta rIte samajAvI che. mAtAjI! A badhuM bhaNatAM manamAM koI tattvanI vAta na samajAya to huM gurudeva municandrasUrinI pAse pahoMcI jAuM! teo mane oLakhe che. mArA paMDitajIe ja mArI oLakhANa karAvI hatI. moTA bhAge huM mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarInI sAthe ja gurudeva pAse jatI! teo mArA praznonuM samAdhAna mANa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #19
karatA. aho! e to parama karuNAnI mUrti che. apUrva zAstra-jJAnI che. maMtrajJa che, taMtrajJa che, yaMtrajJa che! divyazaktionA bhaMDAra che. "he mAtA! tamArA A putrano kuSTharoga te kRpALu gurudeve ja miTAvyo che. huM... ApaNe gurudevanAM darzane jaIzuM. mAtAjI! emanA bhavya dehane, emanI karuNAbhInI dRSTine ane emanAM madhura vacanone joI-sAMbhaLIne tame bhAvavibhora thaI jazo. tame natamastaka thaI jazo. emanA parama upakArane tame mukta kaMThe gAvA mAMDaza! devI! teo mArI zraddhA che. teo mArA zaraNa che! teo ja mArA sarvasva che! huM bhavobhava emano upakAra nahIM bhUlI zakuM!' kamalaprabhA bolI UThI : "dhanya che mayaNA tane! tuM zreSTha nArI che!' 10 praya For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #20
"he suzIle! teM mArA putrane kevI rIte nIrogI karyo, e vAta jANavAnI mArI tIvra jijJAsA che." he mAtezvarI! e vAta mAre kahevI ja che, paraMtu e vAta para ApanI zraddhA thAya, te mATe mArA jIvananI thoDI vAto karavI jarUrI che, ke je vAto ApanA saputranI ArogyaprAptimAM sahAyaka banI che. emAM pahelI vAta che paramAtmA RSabhadeva pratyenA mArA avihaDa premanI! mane bAlyakALathI mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarIe bhagavAna RSabhadeva sAthe sAco saMbaMdha bAMdhI Apyo hato. huM pratidina e paramAtmAnAM darzana-pUjana ane kavana karatI hatI ane karuM chuM. huM e prabhunAM gIto racuM chuM ane gAuM chuM! ane jyArathI huM nRtyakaLA zIkhI chuM tyArathI kyAreka kyAreka RSabhadeva-prAsAdamAM... jyAre tyAM koI strI-puruSa na hoya tyAre nRtya paNa karuM chuM! he mAtA! ApaNe e bhavya, suMdara ane kalAtmaka RSabhaprAsAdamAM roja jaIzuM. e prAsAdanA bAhya upavanamAM mane besavAnuM khUba game che. prabhunAM darzana-pUjana-stavana-nartana karyA pachI huM e upavanamAM jaIne besuM chuM. AkhuMya upavana lagabhaga khAlI thaI gayuM hoya, cAlI jatI ramaNIonA nUpura jhaMkAra saMbhaLAtA baMdha thaI gayA hoya, vRkSanA ToDale beThelI koyala dhIru dhIruM, mIThuM mIThuM TahukatI hoya, pAsenA sarovaramAM beTheluM sArasa-belaDuM jyAre nirbhaya banI kriIDA karatuM hoya tyAre huM mArA priya latAmaMDapamAM jaIne besuM chuM. pavananI dhImI laharIo mane bheTatI hoya! e pavanamAM dha mastI hoya! sugaMdha hoya! jANe huM koI nazAno anubhava karuM! evuM koI tattva che tyAM! mAra gheradAra caNiyo ne AchuM jhINuM uttarIya vastra havAmAM UDatAM rahe! ne huM caMpAnI vRkSaghaTAmAM pravezI jAuM! amArA e suvrata-udyAnanA upavanamAM deza-videzanAM aneka vRkSo UgelAM che. e vRkSone deza-dezAntarothI lAvavAmAM, enI prakRtine anukuLa jalavAyu ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #21
dvArA e vRkSone pALavAmAM rAjyanuM ghaNuM dravya kharcAyuM che. enI siMcAI mATe, nirmaLa jaLanI eka kRtrima nahera, vAvaDImAMthI kADhIne upavanamAM cAreya bAju vahAvI devAmAM AvI hatI. e kAmapuSkariNImAM kuzaLa zilpIoe keTalIka kRtrima pahADIo, staMbhacihno ane kalAtmaka mUrtionuM sarjana karyuM hatuM. enAM pratibiMba puSkariNInA svaccha pANImAM paDatAM hatAM. je latAkuMjamAM huM besatI hatI temAM prakAza Avato hato. e kuMjamAM hAthIdAMtanA pAyAvALI eka suMdara zayyA rahetI hatI. temAM huM zAMtithI ArAma karatI hatI. tyAM ratnajaDita sonAnI dhUpadAnImAM kiMmatI sugaMdhI dravya sadA saLagatAM rahetAM. moTA suMdara kuMDAomAM durlabha raMgaberaMgI choDa sajAvIne mUkavAmAM AvatA hatA. koInAM phUla lAla raMganAM, koInAM phUla pILA raMganAM to koInAM nIla varNanAM puSpo hatAM. Avo addabhuta latAkuMja hato. moTA bhAge huM ane kyAreka surasuMdarI - mArI bahena, A latAkuMjamAM AvIne besatAM. eka divasanI vAta che. huM e ja latAkuMjamAM zayyA para ADI paDI hatI tyAM eka prabhAvazALI puruSa mArI sAme AvIne Ubho. meM ene joyo. enI uMmara yauvanane vaTAvI gaI hoya tevI lAgI. paraMtu eno gauravarNa, tejasvI mukha sUryanA jevuM dedIpyamAna hatuM. enA saghana kALA vALa pAchaLa vALelA hatA. enuM prazasta vakSa ane pralaMba puSTa bahu mUlyavAna vastrathI AvRta hatAM. adhoaMga para eka komaLa pIta vastra suzobhita hatuM. enI saghana kALI mUcho enA darzanIya mukha para addabhuta zobhA vistArI rahI hatI. enA kAnomAM hIrAnAM kuMDalo hato. enA gaLAmAM asAdhAraNa durlabha gulAbI AbhAvALI muktAmALA zobhAyamAna hatI. enI moTI moTI kALI camakIlI AMkho ane praphulla sarasa hoThomAMthI AnaMda ane premanI atUTa dhArA pravAhita thaI rahI hatI. enA eka hAthamAM ati mUlyavAna apratima vINA hatI. huM e puruSane joIne zayAmAMthI UbhI thaI gaI hatI. meM Azcaryacakita thaI enI sAme joyuM. acAnaka e puruSe mane prabhAvita karI dIdhI. te divasa sudhI huM koI puruSathI prabhAvita thayelI na hatI. te divase e divya puruSane joI huM kSaNabhara taMbhita thaI gaI. puruSe bolavAnI pahela karI. 12 mayamAM For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #22
'mAlavasuMdarI rAjakumArI madanA prasanna thAo! zuM meM tamArA A ekAMta vizrAmamAM vyAghAta karIne tamane rUSTa karyAM che?' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'nahIM, nahIM, paraMtu Apa, bhaMte! ahIM A surakSita maMDapamAM anumati lIdhA vinA kevI rIte AvI gayA? zuM praharI UMghI gayA che? athavA to Ape emane mAyAthI vimohita karI dIdhA che?' puruSe hasIne kahyuM : nahIM, kumArI! huM adazya thaine AkAzamArge Avyo chuM, bicArA praharI mane joI nahIM zakyA hoya.' huM AzcaryamUDha thaIne bolI : 'paraMtu Apa koNa cho, bhaMte? zuM Apa gaMdharva cho?' 'nahIM bhadre, huM manuSya chuM.' 'paraMtu A rIte AvavAnuM zakya..?' 'mane lopAMjana-vidyA ane kheca2-vidyA siddha che. enA baLe huM AvI zakyo.' 'Apa sAdhAraNa puruSa nathI. mahAnubhAva! Apa koI deva, dAnava, yakSa... mane ThagavA-chetaravA AvyA cho zuM?' 'nahIM nahIM, hai kalyANI! meM tamArA apratima rUpanI, lAvaNyanI, asahya tejanI, darpanI ane lokottara pratibhAnI carcA mArA dezamAM sAMbhaLI hatI. kevaLa tamane jovA mATe ja ghaNA dUra dezathI chadmaveze Avyo chuM. have mane khabara paDI ke sAMbhaLelI vAtothI paNa pratyakSa vAto caDhiyAtI che. tamArA jevI rUpavatI kumArI kadAca vizvamAM bIjI nahIM hoya.' mAruM kutUhala ochuM thayuM hatuM. have mArAmAM thoDI hiMmata AvI hatI. meM mArA rUpanI prazaMsA sAMbhaLIne kahyuM : 'bhaMte! bIjAonI prazaMsA karavAmAM ane potAno gupta prema pragaTa karavAmAM Apa kuzaLa lAgo cho. jevI rIte adRzyarUpe AkAzamArge koI strInA ekAMta-AvAsamAM pahoMcI javA kuzaLa cho tevI...' maNA 'paraMtu bhadre madanA! mArA hRdayamAM tamAro asAdhAraNa prema ghaNA samaya pahelAM (mArA hRdayamAM) gha2 karI gayo hato. tame mane jIvana tathA AtmAthI paNa vadhu priya cho.' meM kahyuM : bhaMte, jarA saMbhALIne A premamArga para kadama mUkajo. kadAca tyAM ApanI vighAo kAma na Ape!' For Private And Personal Use Only 13

Page #23
bhadra, premanA sAcA mArgamAM badhI siddhio tuccha che. paraMtu mAro prema vAsanAnI AgamAM saLagato prema nathI. huM tamane phaLanI suvAsita madirA karatAM adhika nitya, amara ane akhaMDa samajuM chuM.' "oha! to bhaMte, Apano A prema alaukika lAge che!" meM smitavikasita vadane kahyuM : "paraMtu bhaMte, A korI prazaMsAthI mane zuM maLavAnuM?' prema! bhadra, tamane vaza karavAnI eka adbhuta vastu mArI pAse che!" te zuM che! bhaMte?' te bhavya ne bhadra puruSe abhuta vINAne hAthamAM lIdhI. vINA para Azcaryajanaka hAthIdAMtanI kotaraNI thayelI hatI. e vINA, sAdhAraNa vINAothI judI hatI. meM kahyuM : 'bhaMte! avazya A vINA adbhuta cheparaMtu Apa mAruM mUlya A vINAthI mApavAno prayatna nA karazo." eno to hamaNAM ja pheMsalo thaI jaze. jyAre A vINAvAdana sAthe rAjakumArI madanA avazya nRtya karaze! "avazya nRtya?" nizcaya!' 'asaMbhava!" nizcaya!" to pachI cAlo RSabhaprAsAdamAM! huM mArA prabhu sivAya koInI sAme nRtya karatI nathI. RSabhaprAsAdamAM baMne gayAM. AgaMtuka rahasyamaya puruSa raMgamaMDapamAM saMgemaramaranI bhUmi para besI gayo. eNe vINAne jhaMkRta karI. huM mUDhanI jema besI rahI. eka grAma be grAma... upara jyAre e puruSanI AMgaLIo nRtya karavA lAgI ane vAtAvaraNamAM vINAnA svara UbharAvA lAgyA to huM matta thavA lAgI! mane cArebAju mUrtimAna saMgIta, eka priya sukhasparzI ghoSa, eka suSamAthI otaprota vAtAvaraNa pratIta thavA mAMDyuM. vINA vAgI rahI hatI. enI gati tIvra.. tIvratara thatI jatI hatI. mane evuM lAgyuM ke taMtuvAdyanA kaMpanathI je svaralaharI utpanna thaI rahI che, te mArI cAmaDIne vIMdhIne mArA raktamAM praveza karI raktane uttapta karI 14 aSaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #24
rahI che. mAruM mukha lAla thaI gayuM. AMkhomAM mada chavAyo, gAtro kaMpavA lAgyAM. huM mArI saMpUrNa sAvadhAnIthI e puruSapuMgavanA asAdhAraNa vINAvAdanane visphArita najare jotI rahIM. ekAeka e vINAvAdake AMgaLIonI gatimAM pheraphAra karyo. tyAre meM mUDha banIne joyuM to teNe eka ja samaye vINAne traNa grAmomAM vagADavI zarU karI hatI. AvuM kyAreya joyuM na hatuM ke sAMbhaLyuM na hatuM. thoDI ja kSaNomAM huM avaza thaI gaI. mane ema lAgyuM ke mArA zarIramAM lohInA badale garamAgarama madirA vahI rahI che. pachI huM sthira na rahI zakI. huM UbhI thaI, meM bhagavAna RSabhadevane paMcAMga namaskAra karyA ane nRtyano prAraMbha karI dIdho. pahelAM maMda, pachI tIvra ane pachI tIvratara. have e AMgaLIo ane caraNomAM hoDa cAlI hatI. nRtya ane vAdana ekIbhUta thaI gayAM hatAM. vAdakanI AMgaLIo ane mArA caraNa-cApa ekamUrta thaI gayAM hatAM. koNa nRtya karatuM hatuM. koNa vINAvAdana karatuM hatuM? ane koNa e alaukika dRzyane jotuM hatuM? jonArA hatA mAtra bhagavAna RSabhadeva! viNAnA sUra dhImA thatA gayA, nRtya dhImuM paDyuM. ne huM prabhunAM caraNomAM DhaLI paDI. vINAvAdaka rahasya puruSa mane uThAvIne raMgamaMDapanI bahAra pelA latAkuMjamAM laI gayo. dhIre dhIre meM AMkho kholI. pelA vINAvAdake kahyuM : rAjakumArI mayaNAsuMdarIno jaya ho!" huM hArI gaI, bhaMte!" meM kahyuM. "bhadra, premamAM jaya-parAjaya na hoya, tyAM to bheda naSTa thAya che ne ekIkaraNa sarjAya che!" paraMtu bhaMte, A samaye mane je anubhUti thaI te abhUtapUrva hatI. zuM Apa svayaM gaMdharvarAja citraratha alakApurIthI mane tatya karavA padhAryA cho?' bhadra! huM puraMdara chuM!' A rAjagRhInA rAjakumAra puraMdara cho? deva, ajJAnatAmAM mArAthI thayelo avinaya kSamA karo." satya premamAM vinaya-avinaya nathI hotA, bhadra!' deva, tame kevI rIte traNa grAmomAM eka ja kALe viNAvAdana karavAmAM samartha cho? AvuM to traNa lokamAM kaI na karI zake!' mayaNA 1pa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #25
ane, trilokamAM koI jIvadhArI ujjayinInI rAjakumArI madanAnI jema traNa grAmonA tAla para nRtya na karI zake!" paraMtu deva, zuM huM pharIthI AvuM nRtya karI zakIza?' hA, jo AvuM ja vINAvAdana thAya to!" paraMtu, deva! A vINAthI to jaDa-jaMgama badhuM avaza thaI jAya che!" devI, tamArA nRtyathI paNa...!' to deva, zuM ApanA sivAya bIjA koI manuSya AvuM vINAvAdana karI zake che?' "hA, kevaLa gaMdharvarAja citraratha. temaNe ja mane A vINA saMpUrNa vidyA sAthe ApelI che.' 'deva, rAjagRhInA rAja kumAra! zuM pharIthI huM vINAvAdana karavAnI Apane prArthanA karI zakuM?" "nahIM bhadra! paraMtu have tame divya nRtya kyAreya bhUlazo nahIM. jyAre traNa grAmamAM A vINA koI vagADaze, tame AvuM ja alaukika nRtya karI zakazo." to deva, zuM Apa Aje ApanI A ziSyA madanAnuM Atithya grahaNa karazo?' nahIM, bhadra! huM je rIte Avyo hato tevI ja rIte gupta bhAvathI cAlyo jaIza." zuM madanA ApanuM kaMI priya karI zake?' bhadra! meM tamane joIne mArAM netra sArthaka karyA ane tamAruM devadurlabha nRtya mArI vINAdhvaninI sAthe aMgIbhUta karI lIdhuM!" Ama kahIne rAjakumAra puraMdare potAnA gaLAmAMthI te alaukika motInI mALA utArI mArA gaLAmAM paherAvI dIdhI. puraMdara tatkSaNa adRzya thaI gayo. huM vimUDha... Azcaryacakita banelI e AmrakuMjamAM... e latAmaMDapamAM besI rahI... punaH bhagavAna RSabhadevanAM darzana karI, rAjamahelamAM cAlI gaI. he mAtezvarI! A mArI prabhuprItie mArA para ane tamArA A putra para kevI parama kRpA karI hatI, te vAta tame sAMbhaLazo tyAre harSathI gadgad thaI jazo!' 16 ayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #26
bhadra! adbhuta ghaTanA kahI! kharekhara adUbhuta!' rANI kamalaprabhA bolI UThI. tenI AMkho vikasvara thaI gaI hatI. tenI romarAjI harSathI uphullaca thaI gaI hatI. "bha, zuM punaH e rAja kumAra puraMdara tArI pAse Avyo hato?' nA, pharIthI e kyAreya na Avyo, paNa te pachI huM avAranavAra mArI mAtA sAthe bhagavAna RSabhadevanI apratima sauMdaryavALI pratimA samakSa gIta-nRtya karatI rahI. emAM huM sAnabhAna bhUlI paramAtmAmAM tadAkAra thaI jatI! paramAtmAnI apArthiva duniyAmAM pahoMcI jatI! kamalaprabhAnI sAthe zrIpAla paNa mArI vAto sAMbhaLIne kyAreka AzcaryathI... kyAreka harSAtirekathI.. kyAreka ahobhAvathI gadgad thaI jatA hatA. huM emanI sAme joI letI ane mArI vAta AgaLa kahe jatI hatI. mAtAjI! mArA jIvananA ghaDataramAM paheluM sthAna mArI mAtAnuM che. mArI mAtAe mane susaMskAronuM amRtapAna karAveluM che. te kharekhara mahAsatI ane parama zrAvikA che. tenI mati sUkSma che ane dharmatattvanuM ene sAruM jJAna che. eNe ja mArA dhArmika ane AdhyAtmika vikAsa mATe prabuddha jJAnI subuddhine niyukta karyA hatA.' paMDita subuddhi kharekhara zAMta-dAMta ane dhIragaMbhIra zrAvaka che. jinamatanA prakhara jJAtA che. temanA agAdha jJAnanA mAnasarovaramAM krIDA karavAno meM ghaNo AnaMda mANyo che ane temaNe ja mane gurudevazrI AcArya municaMdra jevA maharSino paricaya karAvyo hato. he mAtA! e gurudeve ja mane ane tamArA A putrane ghora du:khanA dAvAnaLamAMthI ugArI levAnI kRpA karI hatI. emanA niHsIma upakArano badalo kyAreya vALI zakAya ema nathI. he mAtezvarI! e pracaMDa duHkhanAM vAdaLa kevAM gherAyAM hatAM, e vAta to pachI kahIza, e pahelAM gurudeva pAse huM kevI rIte gaI, temaNe mane zo upadeza mANA 17 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #27
Apyo... mArA manamAM kevAM saMvedano jAgyAM... vagere vAto karuM chuM. eka divasa mArI mAtA sAthe huM rathamAM besIne suvrata-udyAna"mAM gaI. suvrata-udyAna kSiprA nadInA kinArAnI najIka ja hatuM. ame rathamAMthI UtarI jyAM AcArya municandra beThA hatA, tyAM pahoMcyAM, teo eka vizALa vaTavRkSanI nIce mATIthI lIMpelA cotarA para beThA hatA. teo samAdhistha hatA. tapazcaryAthI ane parisaha sahavAthI temanuM zarIra kRza thaI gayuM hatuM, paraMtu temanI kAnti tapelA suvarNa jevI hatI. emanA zarIra para zveta ane pIta vastro hatAM. emanuM zarIra, emanI AMkho ane emanA zvAsa sthira hatAM. ame mAtA-putrI thoDe dUra cUpacApa besI gayAM, AcArye AMkho kholI. sthira daSTithI temaNe amane joyAM. suMdara manohara prabhAta hatuM. vaizAkhI pUrNimAno bIjo divasa hato. AkAza svaccha hatuM. sUryanAM sonerI kiraNo udyAnanI zobhA vadhArI rahyAM hatAM. bhadra! dharmalAbha!' AcArye amane AzIrvAda ApyA. mArI mAtAe temane sukhazAtA pUchI, temanA mukha para prasannatA chavAI. mArI mAtAe kahyuM : gurudeva, A mArI putrI madanA che.' rAjakumArI madanAsuMdarI? aho! meM sAMbhaLyuM che ke madanA bhagavAna RSabhadevanI gIta-nRtyathI zreSTha bhakti kare che!" bhaMte, zreSTha to nahIM, paNa bhAvathI thoDI bhakti karI lauM chuM!' vatsa, gIta-nRtya zreSTha bhakti che! temAM tanmayatA AvI jAya che... temAM bAhya duniyA vIsarI javAya che. prabhumaya banI javAya che!" satya che, prabho! mane evo ja anubhava thAya che...' tuM bhagavapAne pAtra banI che, bhadra! tArA prabaLa puNyano udaya che!" ApanA AzIrvAda che, gurudeva!' mArI mAtA gadgad svare bolI. AcArya thoDI kSaNa mauna thaI gayA... AMkho baMdha karI. temanA mukha para gaMbhIratA UpasI AvI.. thoDI vAra pachI AMkho kholI... temaNe sAme joyuM ane bolyA : bhadra, bhagavAna RSabhadeva arihaMta che. vItarAga che. sarvajJa che. trilokapUjya che. yathArthavAdI che. e bhagavaMte kahyuM che ke AtmA anAdi che. anAdikALathI jIva ane karmano saMyoga che. ane e saMyoganA kAraNe duHkho che. duHkhonI paraMparA che. mATe AtmA para lAgelAM karmonAM baMdhanone 18 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #28
jANavAM joIe ane e baMdhanone toDavAno puruSArtha karavo joIe. he rAjakumArI! A saMsAramAM pratyeka jIvAtmA pota-potAnAM zubha-azubha karmonA AdhAre sukha-duHkha pAme che. koI jIva koIne sukhI nathI karI zakato, koI jIva koIne duHkhI nathI karI zakato. jIvAtmA svayaM ja potAnAM karmothI... janama-janamamAM bAMdhelAM karmothI sukha-duHkha pAme che. anAdikALathI A cakra cAlI rahyuM che. A karmonA cakrano nAza dharmathI thaI zake che. zuddha dharmathI... dharmanA AcaraNathI thaI zake che. 'bhaMte! e dharmanuM svarUpa samajAvazo?' meM pUchayuM. 'bhadra, dharmano prAraMbha zraddhAthI thAya che. vItarAgasarvajJa paramAtmA upara zraddhA, nigrantha zramaNo para zraddhA ane sarvajJabhASita jinamata para zraddhA A dharmano pAyo che.' - 'bhaMte, A zraddhAbhAva huM mArA hRdayamAM dhAraNa karuM chuM.' meM kahyuM. 'suzIle! teM sAro ne sAryo zraddhAbhAva dhAraNa karyo. have pachI tAre sabhyajJAna prApta karavAnuM che. je tattvo para teM zraddhA karI, te tattvone yathArtharUpe jANavAM joIe. mahAzrAvaka subuddhi tane e jJAna Apaze; ane huM paNa tane avasare tattvabodha ApIza.' 'kRtArtha thaI, bhaMte! huM gurudevanI karuNAthI Ardra thaI gaI. 'vatse, kharekhara to tuM tyAre kRtArtha thaIza ke jyAre gRhastha dharmanAM bAra vratono svIkAra karIza.' 'bhagavan! e bAra vrato kayAM che?' 'e tane subuddhi samajAvaze, bhadre! pachI vidhivat tane huM vrato ApIza. tuM jinamatanI prabuddha zrAvikA banIza!' For Private And Personal Use Only 'ApanI 52makRpA, gurudeva!' meM hAtha joDI, mastaka namAvI vaMdanA karI. AcArye mauna dhAraNa karyuM. AMkho baMdha karI. meM paNa AMkho baMdha karI gurudevanA saumya-zItala mukhanuM dhyAna karyuM. meM ane mArI mAtAe UbhAM thaI, gurudevane vaMdana karI, 2tha tarapha cAlavA mAMDyuM. ame amArA rAjamahelamAM AvI gayAM. mArA paMDita subuddhi mArI rAha jotA hatA. meM temanAM caraNomAM praNAma karyA ane kahyuM : 'bhaMte; ame AcAryazrI municandranAM darzana karI AvyAM, mArAM mAtA paNa sAthe hatAM. caNA 19

Page #29
Aje pahelI vAra ja gurudevanAM darzana thayAM. mana prasanna thayuM. temano bodha gamyo ane temanuM vyaktitva paNa AkarSaka lAgyuM." "bhate gurudeve mane gRhastha dharmanAM bAra vratonI samajaNa ApanI pAsethI levA kahyuM che!" bhadra, tame zramamukta thAo. svastha thAo. pachI huM tamane adhyApana karAvuM.' e divase paMDitazrI subuddhie mane gRhastha dharma ane zramahAdharma - baMne dharmonuM jJAna ApyuM. bAra vrato mane sArI rIte samajAvyAM. meM mArA manamAM vicAryuM : "huM AvatI kAle gurudeva pAse jaIne vidhivat vratone grahaNa karIza.' rAta aMdhArI hatI. rimajhima varSA thaI rahI hatI. ThaMDI havA vahI rahI hatI. mAro rAjaprAsAda eTale ke mArI mAtA rANI rUpasuMdarIno prAsAda dIpakona maMda AlokathI Alokita ane gaMdhadravyothI surabhita hato. rAta gahana thatI jatI hatI ane mArA manamAM AcArya municandranAM upadezavacano ghumarAvA lAgyAM. mArA pitAjI mahArAjA prajApAla amArA mahelamAM hatA. mahelamAM mRdula vAghono jhaMkAra raNakato hato. nUpura ane kaMkaNanA priya dhvani guMjatA hatA. dAsIoe AvIne mane kahyuM : "bhadra, Apane pitRpAda yAda kare che. have zayanano samaya thayo che. Apa AjJA karo to gIta-nRtyano kAryakrama paNa thaI zakaze. ujjayinInI zreSTha suMdarI kAdaMbarI nRtya mATe pratIkSA karI rahI che.' mayaNAe kaMIka zramita svare kahyuM : "zubhe! hamaNAM UbhI rahI. mane vicAravA do. AvuM badhuM to huM varSothI jotI AvI chuM, bhogavatI AvI chuM. suMdarIonAM nRtya, kokilakaMThI kanyAonAM kalagAna... taMtrInI svaralaharI... nA, nA, have mane A badhAMthI tRpti nahIM thAya. nRtya nathI jovuM. gIta nathI sAMbhaLavuM, pIThamarthana nathI karAvavuM. pitAjIne kaho ke teo mArI pratIkSA na kare ane tame sahu zayana karo." dAsIo cAlI gaI. rAta gaMbhIra thatI cAlI. rAjamahelamAM zAMti chavAI gaI. sugaMdhita dIpako saLagI rahyA hatA. snigdha prakAza phelAI rahyo hato. 20 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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AkAzamAM kALAM vAdaLa pharI rahyAM hatAM. thoDI thoDI phuvAra varasI rahI hatI, mArI vicAradhArA pravAhita thaI. meM devatAo, preto, tAMtriko, siddha ane yogIonA viSayamAM ghaNuM badhuM sAMbhaLyuM hatuM. huM e badhI vAto para vicAro karatI rahetI. kyAreka kyAreka mArI mAtA sAthe, mArA paMDita sAthe vArtAlApa karatI. paraMtu chevaTe e badhI vAto tarapha virakta banatI. mAruM mana mAnatuM nahIM. huM AvI nIrava rAte AtmaciMtana karatI. jIvananAM rahasya pAmavA mATe meM jinadarzananuM, enAM tattvonuM adhyayana karyuM hatuM. A tattvonuM adhyayana ane paramAtmAnuM pUjana - A be vAto mArI khUba priya vAto hatI. Aje mArA manamAM AcArya municandrano gahana dharmabodha ciMtana karavA prerita karato hato. temaNe kahyuM hatuM : "he rAjakumArI, A saMsAramAM pratyeka jIvAtmA potapotAnAM zubha-azubha karmonA AdhAre sukha-duHkha pAme che. koI jIva koIne sukhI nathI karI zakato, koI jIva koIne duHkhI nathI karI zakata.' kevI gaMbhIra ne gahana vAta karI e tejasvI AcAryo? dareka jIva pUrvakRta karmone sukharUpe ne duHkharUpe bhogave che. dareka jIva svayaM zubha karma bAMdhe che, azubha karmo bAMdhe che. mAre have jANavuM ja paDaze ke kama kevI rIte baMdhAya che! zubha karma kevI rIte baMdhAya che? azubha karma kevI rIte baMdhAya che? sAthe sAthe, anAdikALathI AtmA sAthe je karmono saMyoga che, anAdi saMyoga che, te saMyoga kevI rIte toDI zakAya? mAre A tattvajJAnane mULathI jANavuM paDaze. paMDita subuddhi avazya mane samajAvaze, zrIpAlanI mAtA bolyAM : "vatsa, ATalI nAnI uMmaramAM tane rAjamahelanA bhoga-sukho... raMga-rAga.. AnaMda-pramoda A badhuM na gamyuM? A to rAjamahelamAM rahelI tuM eka sAdhvI ja kahevAya! zuM tArA manamAM bhogecchAo na jAgI? zabda, rUpa, rasa, gaMdha ane sparzanA divya sukho bhogavavAnI tIvra IcchA na jAgI? dhanyavAda ApuM tane ke mUrkhatA kahuM?' mAtAjI! mArI ujjayinInI duniyA mane mUrkha ja mAne che! huM rAjakumArI hovA chatAM suMdara rAja kumArane pasaMda karI tenI sAthe lagna na karyA ane kuSTharogI evA uMbarANA sAthe bharAyelI rAjasabhAmAM lagna karyo tene duniyA mUrkhatA kahe che! eka mArI mAtA rANI rUpasuMdarI, bIjA adhyakSa For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArA adhyApaka paMDita subuddhi ane trIjA mArA gurudeva AcArya municandra - A traNeye mane dhanyavAda ApyA che. e traNeye ja mane prAjJa mAnI che! mArA mATe te ghaNuM che!" bhadra! have e traNeyanI sAthe kamalaprabhA paNa tane aMtarathI vadhAre che! premathI thapathapAve che... ane sukha-du:khamAM sadaiva sAthe rahevAnuM vacana Ape che! "vatsa, eka vAta pUchuM?' avazya pUcho, bhaMte! zrIpAla nIrogI thaI gayAnA samAcAra zuM rAjamahelamAM nathI pahoMcyA?" nA, mAtAjI. haju mArI mAtAne paNa samAcAra nathI maLyA. mArI mAtAe to mArI sAthe ja rAjamahela choDyo hato. e mArA mAmA puNayapAla ke jeo sAmatarAjA che, temanA mahele cAlI gaI hatI. haju te mArA mAmAnA ghare ja rahelI che. te mAtezvarI! mAre sAme cAlIne koIne samAcAra ApavA nathI. ApaNe A gharamAM sukhI chIe. tamArA putrane joIne halve koI du:kha yAda AvatuM nathI." kamalaprabhAnI AMkho bhInI thaI gaI. te mane bheTI paDI. tenI AMkhomAMthI avirata agrudhArA vahetI rahI. meM tene dhIre dhIre zAMta pADI. "he mahArANI! paramAtmAnI. bhagavAna 28SabhadevanI ane gurudeva municandranI kevI divya kRpA mArA para, ke mane kuSTharogInA rUpamAM caMpAnagarIno rAjA bhartAra maLyo! ane rAjamAtA kamalaprabhA jIvatIjAgatI ahIM AvI maLI! A che puNyakarmano khelA puNyakarma udayamAM AvyA pachI manuSyane koI duHkhI karI zakatuM nathI. he bhagavatI! tamAro paNa kevo zreSTha puNyodaya ke tamane tamAro putra nIrogI maLyo! ane bIjo zreSTha puNyodaya - ujjayinInI rAjakumArI ane putravadhU maLI! e paNa eka mahAsatI! mahAna sAttvika ane paramAtmAnI parama upAsikA! sadgurunI kRpAne pAtrI" he bhagavatI, haju to mAre ghaNI vAto karavAnI che... tamArA putranI vAta to ghaNI moDI karIza... nArAja nahIM thAone?' kamalaprabhA hasI paDI.. mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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AcArya subuddhie zveta kauzeya dhAraNa karyuM hatuM. emanA mAthAnA ane dADhInA vALa zubhra rajata samAna hatA. temano gauravarNa ane tejasvI mukhamaMDala atyaMta zobhAyamAna lAgatuM hatuM. temanI saMpUrNa daMtapaMkti mUlyavAna muktapaMkti jevI zobhatI hatI. emanuM mRdu hAsya zarada kaumudIthI paNa zItala ane tRptikAraka hatuM. teo bahu ochuM zayana karatA hatA ane divasamAM eka vAra ja AhAra letA hatA. emanI khyAti mAtra mAlavadezamAM ja nahIM, dezadezAMtaramAM phelAyelI hatI. temanI jJAnasaMpadA apAra hatI. teo kyAre ya kuddha nahotA thatA. emanuM pAMDitya agAdha hatuM. emanA vicAra hamezAM asaMdigdha rahetA. temanI dArzanika vidvattA lokottara hatI. temano deha kaMIka lAMbo, durbaLa chatAM baliSTha hato. nAsikA unnata, lalATa prazasta, netra mAMsala snigdha ane tejasvI hatAM. temanA hRdayamAM bhUtadayA hatI, divya jJAna hatuM ane samadarzitA hatI. sarvajJa zAsanane teo samarpita hatA. meM temane kyAreya rogI, pIDita, thAkelA ke klAnta nathI joyA. Aje teo sUryodaya pachI tarata ja rAjamahelamAM AvI gayA hatA. mArI mAtAe temanuM ucita svAgata karI, dugdhapAna mATe nimaMtraNa karyuM. huM paNa snAnAdithI paravArI dudhapAna karI adhyayanakakSamAM cAlI gaI hatI. Aje AcArya ane karmasiddhAMta' vistArathI samajAvavAnA hatA. teo adhyayanakakSamAM padhAryA. meM UbhA thaI temanuM svAgata karyuM. temaNe mane AzIrvAda ApyA ane Asana para birAjamAna thayA. saumya! Aja tane huM sarvajJabhASita karmasiddhAMtanI thoDI samaja ApIza." bhaMte! Apa samajAvazo te huM ekAgra manathI grahaNa karIza." AcArye potAnuM kathanIya zarU karyuM. bhadra, karmabaMdha rAga-dveSathI thAya che. rAga-dveSanI sAthe mithyAtva, avirati, pramAda ane mana-vacana-kAyAnA yogo rahelAM hoya che. A mANA 23 For Private And Personal Use Only

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karmabaMdha ATha prakArano thAya che. arthAta jIvAtmA ATha prakAranAM karmothI baMdhAyA kare che. temAM paheluM karma che jJAnAvaraNa. A karma AtmAnA jJAnaguNane Avare che. kSAyika ane kSAyopathamika - baMne Avare che. parokSa ane pratyakSa - baMne jJAnane Avare che. A karmanA kAraNe jIvamAM ajJAnatA, buddhihInatA vagere dekhAya che. bIjuM karma che darzanAvaraNa. cakSudarzana Adi AtmAnI darzanazaktine Avare che. AtmAnA darzanaguNane Avare che. A karmanA udayathI pAMceya prakAranI nidrAo Ave che. - trIjuM karma che vedanIya. sukhAnubhava ane duHkhAnubhava - A karmanAM A be kAma che. A karma AtmAnA sahaja-svAbhAvika sukhano anubhava karavA detuM nathI. cothuM karma che mohanIya, jenAthI jIva mohita thAya te mohanIya karma! UMdhI samaja ane krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha A karmanI dena che. hAsyAdi "nokaSAyonI vikRti paNa A ja karmanI bheTa che. ATheya karmomAM A karmanI jAlimatA-prabaLatA gajaba hoya che. pAMcamuM karma che AyuSya. A karmanI kRpAthI to jIva jIve che! prANa dhAraNa kare che. janma ane mRtyu A karmanI kRpAnuM phaLa che! chaThTha karma che nAmakarma. jIvane gati (yoni) ApavI, jAti-ekendriyAdi ApavI, sUkSmatva-sthUlatva, yaza-apayaza, saubhAgya-durbhAgya, rUpa-rasAdi vagere ApavAnuM kAma A karmanuM che. samagra zarIraracanA A karmane AbhArI che. A karma AtmAnA arUpIpaNAne Avare che. sAtamuM karma che gotrakarma. uttama kuLanI prApti, uttama jAtinI prApti, pratibhA ane aizvarya... A karma Ape che, tevI ja rIte nIca kuLa, nIca jAti vagere paNa A ja karma Ape che. AtmAnA agurulaghu gaNane A karma Avare che. uccatA ane nIcatA A karmanA anusAra prApta thAya che. AThamuM karma che aMtarAya. A karma, sAme pAtra hoya ane pAse ApavAnI vastu hoya, chatAM ApavAno bhAva jAgavA na de tevI rIte icchita vastunI, sukhanI prApti na thavA de. prApta thayelAM sukho bhogavavA na de. AtmAnI anaMta zaktine A karme AvRtta karI che. rokI che, rodhI che. 24 ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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A rIte, he bhadra! jIvAtmA mithyAtvAdi sahita rAga-dveSathI maulika karmabaMdha kare che. e karelA karmabaMdha anusAra karmo udayamAM AvIne potAno prabhAva batAve che. cAra gatimAM paribhramaNa karatA jIvonuM AMtara-bAhya samagra vyaktitva, A Aya karmono ja prabhAva che. AtmAnuM maulika svarUpa je anaMtajJAna, anaMta darzana, avyAbAdha sthiti, vItarAgatA, akSaya sthiti, arUpIpaNuM, agurulaghutA ane anaMta vIrya che, te ATha karmothI AvarAyeluM-dabAyeluM paDyuM che. he bhadra, karmasiddhAMta-karmavijJAnanI pAyAnI vAta A maulika ATha prakArano karmabaMdha che. samagra karmasiddhAMtanI A AdhArazilA che. AtmAnI svabhAvadazAne AvRtta karIne vibhAvadazAmAM ramaNatA karAvanArAM A ATha prakAranAM karmo, samagra jIvasRSTi para chavAyelAM che. koI saMsAravartI jIva A karmonA prabhAvathI bacelo nathI. he prAjJakumArI! have tane huM cAra prakAre karmabaMdha kevI rIte thAya che te samajAvuM chuM. tuM ekAgra manathI zravaNa karaje." hA bhagavaMta, huM sthira citte zravaNa karIza." bhadra, jyAre A karmo baMdhAya che tyAre enI sthiti (kALamAna), eno rasa ane pradezo paNa sAthe ja baMdhAya che. sthiti-rasa ane pradezanA baMdhathI "prakRtibaMdha' viziSTa bane che. jIva jyAre tIvra AzayavALo hoya che, tIvra vicAro karato hoya che tyAre prakRtibaMdha tIvra thAya che. jyAre jIva maMda AzayavALo hoya che tyAre prakRtibaMdha paNa maMda thAya che. jyAre madhyamakoTinA vicAro karato hoya che tyAre karmo madhyama rIte baMdhAya che. tIvratAthI baMdhAyelAM karmo jyAre udayamAM Ave tyAre jIva teno tIvra anubhava kare. maMda baMdhAyelAM karmo udayamAM Ave tyAre jIva teno maMda anubhava kare ane madhyama baMdhAyelAM karmo madhyama anubhava karAve che. jevo baMdha tevo udaya! bIjo che sthitibaMdha. karmapudgalonuM AtmapradezomAM je avasthAna te sthiti' kahevAya. arthAtu karmono AtmAmAM avasthAnakALa (utkRSTa kALa ane jaghanya kALa) no nirNaya je thAya tenuM nAma sthitibaMdha. trIjo che rasabaMdha. zubhAzubha karmonA baMdha samaye ja "rasa' baMdhAya che. mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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teno vipAka, nAmakarmanAM gati Adi sthAnomAM rahelo jIva anubhave che. sukha-du:khanAM tIvra athavA maMda saMvedano, A rasabaMdha para nirbhara hoya che. tIvra adhyavasAyathI zubha karma bAMdhyuM hoya to e karmano udaya thatAM sukhanuM saMvedana paNa tIvra thavAnuM ane azubha karma tIvra adhyavasAyathI bAMdhyuM hoya to duHkhano anubhava tIvra koTino thavAno. cotho che pradezabaMdha, mana-vacana-kAyAthI, AtmA potAnA sarva pradezothI karmaskaMdho grahaNa kare, te pradezabaMdha kahevAya. eka-eka AtmapradezamAM jJAnAvaraNa Adi dareka karmanA anaMta-anaMta jugalo baMdhAya che. A rIte AtmA sAthe karma-prakRtio baMdhAya che. jJAnAvaraNa Adi karmapudgalothI AtmAnuM je baMdhAvuM, arthAt parAdhIna thavuM, tene baMdha' kahevAmAM Ave che. AtmAnA asaMkhya pradezo anaMta-anaMta karmothI baMdhAyelA che. karma ane AtmAnI ekatA thavI, tenuM nAma prakRtibaMdha. te ekatA thatI vakhate ja sthitirasa ane pradezanA nirNaya thaI jatA hoya che. A rIte pratibaMdha viziSTa bane che. jyAM sudhI AtmA A rIte karmabaMdha karato rahe tyAM sudhI sukha-duHkhanA Addha cAlatAM ja rahevAnAM. saMsAraparibhramaNa cAlatuM ja rahevAnuM. tyAM sudhI AtmA svarUpamAM pUrNa ramaNatA na karI zake. karmabaMdhanuM vijJAna eTalA mATe samajavAnuM che ke jIva navA karmabaMdha na kare! AcArya subuddhi bolyA : madanA, karmabaMdhanI A vAto tuM samajI rahI che ne beTI?' hA, bhaMte! mane samajAya che.' to have tane karmabaMdhanAM kAraNabhUta traNa tattvo samajAvuM chuM. te tattvo che : (1) yoga, (2) kapAya, (3) legyA. karmapudgalo ema ja akAraNa AtmAmAM AvI jatAM nathI. jIva manathI vicAro kare che, vacanathI bole che ane kAyAthI - pAMca indriyothI pravRtti kare che, mATe karmayugalo AtmAmAM Ave che; ne rahe che. A eka atyaMta sUkSma prakriyA che. pratikSaNa, pratisamaya A prakriyA dareka jIvAtmAmAM cAlu ja rahe che. mana-vacana ane kAyAnAM yaMtro niraMtara cAlu rahe che. mATe karmapudgalonuM AtmAmAM AvavuM paNa niraMtara cAlu che. bhadra, tArA manamAM prazna thato haze ke karmapudgalo kyAMthI AvIne 26 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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AtmAne vaLage che? hA, gurudeva! evI zaMkA manamAM UThI.' 'karmavargaNAnAM anaMta anaMta pudgala A samagra cauda rAjalokamAM ThAMsIThAMsIne bharelAM che. anaMta-anaMta jIvo, eka kSaNano vikSepa pADayA vinA, pratisamaya anaMta-anaMta karmapudgalo grahaNa kare che. chatAM e kArmaNavargaNAno vipula jaththo kyAre ya ocho thato nathI. jema vizvamAM kAmaNavargaNAno anaMta jaththo bharelo che tema bIjI paccIsa - kula chavvIsa vargaNAothI A loka bharelo che. kharekhara, A vizvamAM zuM nathI? ApaNe jANI zakatA nathI evuM to anaMta-apAra bhareluM che. tene sarvajJo jANe che, jue che! manathI-vacanathI ke kAyAthI koI paNa sUkSma ke sthUla pravRtti karI ke ATheya prakAranAM karmapudgalo AtmAmAM AvI javAnAM. e karmayugalonA sArAnarasA prabhAvono anubhava kaSAya'nA mAdhyamathI thAya che. bhadra! krodha, mAna, mAyA ane lobha - A cAra mukhya kaSAyo che ane kaSAyonuM svarUpa to meM tane pUrve samajAveluM che. AtmapradezamAM rahelAM karmayugalonuM sukhAtmaka ane duHkhAtmaka saMvedana, A kaSAyo vinA thaI zakatuM nathI. AtmAnI sAthe baMdhAyelAM karmapudgalonI sthitino nirNaya kaSAyo nathI karatA, te kAma "lezyA' kare che! A rIte - * mana-vacana-kAyAnA yogothI pradezabaMdha. che. krodhAdi kaSAyothI pradezabaddha karmono anubhava. lezyAthI utkRSTa-madhyama ane jaghanya sthitinuM nirmANa. A traNa mukhya vAto yAda rAkhavAnI che. zA mATe manane pApa-vicArothI mukta karavAno ane zubha-zuddha vicArothI manane nirmaLa karavAno upadeza tIrthaMkara paramAtmAe Apyo che, te samajAyuM ne? zA mATe pAmavANI nahIM bolavAno ane hita-mita-priya ane pathya bolavAno ja Agraha jJAnI papAM kare che, A vAta buddhimAM Utare che ne? zA mATe pAMca indriyono nigraha karI indriyanigraha keLavavAno upadeza AcAryo Ape che, tenuM rahasya samajAyuM ne? he prAjJA! zubha vicAra, vANI ane vartanathI Atmapradezo sAthe zabha karmo baMdhAya, azubhathI azubha baMdhAya. sukha-duHkhano anubhava kaSAya karAve che. mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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kaSAyono kSaya thayA pachI e pradezabaddha karmo AtmAmAM sukha-duHkhanI lAgaNIo pragaTAvI zake nahIM ane prazasta lezyAomAM ramatAM rahevAthI e pradezabaddha karmonI sthiti paNa sArI baMdhAya che. lezyAono viSaya tArA mATe navo che. Aje e viSaya paNa samajAvI dauM chuM. eka citrakAra bhIMta para citra banAve che, te teM joyuM che ne? citrakAra lAla-pILA ane vAdaLI raMgothI ane bIjA mizra raMgothI suMdara nayanaramya citra bhIMta para ke kenvAsa para athavA bIjA vastra para banAve che. te teM barAbara nihALyuM che ne? are, tuM pote ja citrakAra che ne! tamane khabara hoya che ke A raMgo bhIMta upara, vastra upara ke kAgaLa upara Takaze kevI rIte? bhIMta upara raMgone TakAvanAruM, dIrghakALa sudhI TakAvanAruM tattva tame jANo cho! mAtra pANInA sahAre raMgo dIrghakALa sudhI TakatA nathI. pANI sukAI jAya eTale raMgo kharI paDe. eTale citrakAro zleSa, sareza, guMdarano upayoga kare che. raMgomAM e sareza-guMdara jevA padArtho ghoLI nAMkhavAmAM Ave che. pachI e raMgothI bhIMta raMgavAmAM Ave che. have A vAtano upanaya samajavAno che. AtmA bhIMta che. karmapudUgalo raMga che. karmapudgalo ema ja AtmAnI bhIMta upara coMTI jatAM nathI. vacce koI zleSa sareza guMdara joIe. te zleSa-sareza-guMdara che lezyAo! amuka karmapudgalo AtmA para pacIsa varSa Take, amuka karmo pAMcaso varSa Take, A samayamaryAdAnuM niyaMtraNa lezyAo kare che. A lezyAo cha prakAranI che. traNa lezyA zubha che ne traNa lezyA azubha che. kRSNa-nIlakApota A traNa lezyAo azubha che. tejo, padma ane zukla A traNa lezyAo zubha che. - 28 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir jyAre karmabaMdhamAM tIvra pariNAmavALI azubha lezyAo bhaLe che tyAre karmonI ati dIrgha sthiti ke je ati du:khamayI sthiti hoya che, te baMdhAya che... karmabaMdhamAM jyAre zubha lezyAo bhaLe che tyAre vizuddhatama zubhapariNAmavALI karmasthiti baMdhAya che. lezyAnI paribhASA A pramANe RSioe karelI che 'kRSNAdidravyasAcivyAt pariNAmo ya AtmanaH / sphaTikasyeva tatrAyaM 'lezyA' zabda: prayujyate / / ' For Private And Personal Use Only maNA

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je rIte sphaTikamaNi vibhinna vargonuM sAMnidhya prApta karIne te varSomAM pratibhAsita thAya che te rIte kRSNAdi dravyonuM sAMnidhya pAmIne AtmAnA pariNAma, te rUpamAM pariNata thAya che. AtmAnI A pariNati "bhAvalezyA' kahevAya che. je kRSNAdi dravyono nirdeza karyo te dravyalezyA kahevAya che. dravyalezyA paugalika che. bhAvalezyA AtmapariNAmarUpa hoya che. joke pariNAma, adhyavasAya ane vezyA - A traNeyano ghaniSTha saMbaMdha che, jyAM pariNAma zubha hoya che, adhyavasAya prazasta hoya che tyAM vezyA vizuddhamAna hoya che. karmonI nirjarAmAM pariNAmonuM zubha hovuM, adhya-vasAyonuM prazasta hovuM ane vezyAonuM vizuddha hovuM Avazyaka hoya che. AnAthI viparIta, jyAre pariNAma azubha hoya che tyAre adhyavasAya aprazasta hoya che ane vezyA saMkSipta hoya che. AthI ema samajAya che ke karmabaMdhanamAM ane karmanirjarAmAM pariNAma, adhyavasAya ane vezyAonuM sammilitarUpe saMpUrNa yogadAna che. Ano phalitArtha e che ke manuSya jo zubha karmabaMdha karavo hoya, karmonI nirjarA karavI hoya, to eNe potAnAM pariNAma, adhyavasAyo ane lezyAone zubha rAkhavAM joIe. AcArya aTakyA. temaNe be-cAra kSaNa AMkho baMdha karI. meM paNa mArA zarIrane thoDuM maraDyuM. AsapAsa joyuM. dvAra para mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI UbhI hatI. tenA mukha para smita ramatuM hatuM. AcArye paNa AMkho kholI hatI. mArI mAtAe temanuM abhivAdana karyuM. meM ApanA adhyApanakAryamAM vikSepa karyo, bhaMte?' nahIM devI; Ame ya thoDI kSaNono vizrAma Avazyaka hato.' jAuM chuM. ApanI pAvana girA vahevA do... mArI mA mArI sAme hasI ane cAlI gaI. huM AcArya pAsethI khUba jJAna prApta karuM, evuM mArI mA icchatI hatI ane huM enI icchA pUrNa karatI hatI, tethI e rAjI thatI hatI. AcAryuM amArA viSayanuM anusaMdhAna karatAM kahyuM : bhadra, je karmo jIve bAMdhyAM hoya te ja karma udayamAM Ave. jyAre jIva karma bAMdhe che tyAre ja e nakkI thaI jatuM hoya che ke A karma keTalA samaya pachI udayamAM Avaze. hA, eka vAta samajI levI joIe ke baMdhAyelAM badhAM ja karma vipAkodayamAM na paNa Ave. arthAt jyAre e udayamAM Ave tyAre mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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jIvane sukha-duHkhanA anubhava na paNa thAya. chatAM udayamAM AvI jAya ne bhogavAI jAya! Ane 'pradezodaya' kahevAmAM Avyo che. madanA! karmanA ATha prakAromAM je nAmakarma che, tenA avAMtara 103 prakAra che. temAM "gati-nAmakarma' Ave che. jIva vartamAnamAM je gatimAM hoya te gatimAM AgAmI gatinuM nAmakarma bAMdhato hoya che. jema ke vartamAnamAM eka jIva manuSyagatimAM che, te jIva A pachInI mRtyu pachInI) gati A bhavamAM ja nakkI karI le che. joke manuSyane e jJAna hotuM nathI ke eNe kyAre ne kaI gatinuM nAmakarma bAMdhyuM! paNa e baMdhAI ja jatuM hoya che. gotrakarma paNa ene anurUpa baMdhAI jAya che ane AyuSyakarma paNa e ja gatinuM baMdhAya che. mRtyu pachI jIva e bhavamAM, e gatimAM utpanna thAya tyAre te bhavane anurUpa zarIranuM e svayaM nirmANa kare che. evuM nathI hotuM ke zarIra taiyAra hoya ne jIva emAM pravezI jAya! jIva svayaM potAnA zarIranI racanA kare che. narakagatimAM jAya to narakanuM zarIra banAve ne devalokamAM jAya to devanuM zarIra banAve. manuSyagatimAM jAya to manuSyanuM ane tiryaMcagatimAM jAya tyAM tiryaMcanuM zarIra banAve. zarIranirmANanI sAthe ja indriyonuM nirmANa thatuM hoya che. deva-nAraka ane manuSyanA bhavamAM to zarIraracanAnI sAthe ja pAMca indriyonI racanA thatI hoya che. tiryaMcagati (pazu-pakSI Adino bhava) evI che ke jyAM eka, be, traNa, cAra ane pAMca indriyonI racanA thAya che. koI jIvane eka ja indriyo hoya, koIne be, koIne traNa, koIne cAra ane koIne pAMca indriyo hoya che. jIvAtmA A indriyonA mAdhyamathI viSayo grahaNa kare che. dareka jIvane sparzanendriya to hoya ja. zarIra bane eTale sparzana-indriya to banI ja jAya. zubha ane azubha, sArA ne narasA sparzano anubhava A indriyathI thAya. rasanendriyane priya viSaya maLe eTale jIvAtmAne sukhano anubhava thAya ane apriya viSaya maLe - aNagamato rasa maLe eTale duHkhAnubhava thAya. dhrANendriyane sugaMdha maLe eTale sukha ane durgadha maLe eTale duHkha! cakSurindriyane rUpano viSaya maLe eTale jIva rAjI ane kurUpa viSaya maLe eTale nArAja! zravaNendriyane mITho zabda maLe eTale jIvane AnaMda thAya 30 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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che ane kaDavo zabda maLe eTale udvega thAya che. A rIte he bhadra! iSTa viSayanimittaka sukhAnubhava che. aniSTa viSayanimittaka du:khanubhava che. eka vAta spaSTa karI dauM. je-te viSaya grahaNa karavAnuM kArya indriyonuM che. sukha-duHkhanA anubhava karavAnuM kAma mananuM che. jIvAtmA indriyothI viSaya grahaNa kare che ane manathI sukha-duHkhanA anubhava kare che. hA, saMsAramAM evA anaMta jIvo che ke jemane zarIra che, indriyo che, paNa mana nathI! AvuM manuSyagati ane tiryaMcagatimAM ja hoya. devone ane nArakone to pAMceya indriyo ane mana hoya ja. bhadra! ekendriyathI paMcendriya sudhInA je jIvone mana nathI hotuM te jIvone saMjJA' to hoya ja che. mana vinAnA jIvone icchA to hoya. khAvAnI icchA, cAlavAnI icchA... dravya bheguM karavAnI icchA... vagere. mana vinA paNa jIva icchAo karI zake che. paNa e icchAo ane manathI thatI icchAomAM ghaNuM aMtara hoya che. karmabaMdhanI dRSTie paNa aMtara paDatuM hoya che. ApaNe manavALA mAnavI chIe! jo e mana priya-apriya viSayomAM sukha-duHkhanA anubhavamAM bhaTakatuM raheze to vartamAna jIvanamAM azAnti ane paralokamAM ghora duHkha lamaNe lakhAyelAM samajo! AcArye potAnuM vaktavya pUrNa karyuM. teo UbhA thayA. meM UbhA thaI temane be hAtha joDI mastaka namAvI vaMdana karyuM. temaNe AzIrvacana ApyAM ane cAlyA gayA. mArI sAsu kamalaprabhA ekAgra citte mAruM kathanIya sAMbhaLI rahyAM hatAM. sAthe sAthe zrIpAla paNa mugdha bhAve zravaNa karI rahyA hatA. A badhI vAto temanA mATe navI hatI, apUrva hatI, game tevI hatI. kamalaprabhA bolI UDyAM: "adbhuta tattvajJAna che kamanuM!' mANo 31 For Private And Personal Use Only

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koI divasa nahIM ane Aje zaivapaMthI sAdhu bhikSA levA amArA ghare AvI gayA. mArI sAsue sAdhune bhikSA ApI, sAdhu cAlyA gayA pachI mArI sAsue mane pUchayuM : "bhadra, A sAdhu jaina sAdhu na hatA... emaNe to geruvA raMganAM vastra paherelAM hatAM ane hAthamAM kamaMDala hatuM.' 'bhagavatI! e zaivamatanA sAdhu hatA. ahIM nagaranI pUrva dizAmAM zaivamatano Azrama che. mAlavapatie ja Azrama mATe bAra ekara jeTalI jagA bheTa ApelI che. tyAM yogI aghorAnaMda AzramanA kulapati che, teo ja AcArya che. temane "mahAkAzyapa' kahevAmAM Ave che." mAtAjI! meM Apane kahyuM hatuM ke mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarI ane emanI putrI surasuMdarI zaivamatamAM zraddhA dharAve che, eTale teo avAra-navAra zaivamaThamAM jatAM-AvatAM rahe che. temanAM keTalAMka snehIM-saMbaMdhI paNa zaivamatamAM mAne che." bhadra! tuM kyAreya e maThamAM gaI cho? hA, bhagavatI! eka vakhate mahArAjAnI sAthe ame sahu Akho rAjaparivAra maThamAM gayAM hatAM. kSiprA nadInA kinAre ghaNA tApasI tapa karatA hatA, nadIkinAre dUradUra sudhI e tApasonI ghAsa kuTiro dekhAtI hatI. tenAM chAparAMomAMthI agnihomano dhumADo nIkaLyA karato hato. e tApaso vividha vaidika saMpradAyomAM zraddhA rAkhatA hatA ane pota-potAnA ziSyonA samUha sAthe tyAM rahetA hatA. emAMnA aneka tApasa nagaramAM bhikSA levA jatA. potAnA AzramomAM pazupAlana karatA ane zraddhAvAna bhakto pAsethI khUba dAna laIne sArI rIte rahetA hatA... ezaArAmanI jiMdagI jIvatA hatA. jyAre keTalAka tApaso kaThora vrata-tapa paNa karatA hatA. koI koI tapasvI "kaccha cAndrAyaNa' tapa karatA. arthAt caMdra jema ghaTe tema teo bhojana ghaTADatA ane candra vadhe eTale bhojana eka-eka grAsa vadhAratA. A rIte amAsanA divase upavAsa mayumA For Private And Personal Use Only

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karatA. pachI eka-eka divasa eka-eka grAsa AhAra vadhAratA jatA. pUname paMdara grAsa bhojana karatA. pachI eka-eka grAsa ghaTADatA jatA. keTalAka tapasvI mAtra dUdhano ja AhAra letA. keTalAka eka paga upara UbhA rahetA. keTalAka vRkSonI DALIo upara UMdhA laTakatA. keTalAka gaLA sudhI pANImAM UbhA rahIne dhyAna karatA. keTalAka kAMTAonI zayyA para sUI jaIne kAyAne kaSTa ApatA. A rIte vividha prakAre teo kAyAne jANIbUjhIne kaSTa ApatA hatA. keTalAka tApaso kaDakaDatI ThaMDImAM nirvastra banIne jamIna para paDyA rahetA. keTalAka tApaso baLabaLatA unALAmAM paMcAgnitapa karatA. keTalAka tApaso jamInamAM khADA karIne temAM besI divaso sudhI samAdhimAM rahetA. keTalAka nAgA digaMbara rahetA. keTalAka jaTAvALA to keTalAka muMDita mastakavALA hatA. nadInA taTathI thoDe dUra parvatanA zikharamAM ghaNI guphAo che. keTalAka tApaso e guphAomAM ekAntamAM rahetA ane mahinAo sudhI dhyAnastha rahetA. ghaNA tApaso parvatanI kaMdarAomAM nagnAvasthAmAM paDyA rahetA. A tApaso bhUkha, tarasa, zIta... uSNa Adi iti-bhItiothI para hatA, A badhA tapasvIo mohatyAgI hatA, virakta hatA. ghaNA sarvatyAgI hatA ane rAtabhara dhyAnamagna rahetA. AyaNA Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir e zaivamaThamAM bIjo eka vibhAga kApAlikono hato. A kApAliko maDadAonI khoparIonI muMDamALA gaLAmAM dhAraNa karatA. pazuonA zarIranI raktanItaratI khAla zarIra para lapeTIne taMtrazAstranAM vAkyonuM uccAraNa karatA karatA ghUmatA rahetA. A kApAliko moTA bhAge smazAnomAM rAtrivAsa karatA. tyAM teo vividha kutsita, bIbhatsa ane kuTila kriyAo karatA. A kApAliko evo dAvo karatA ke temaNe indriyonI vAsanAne jItI lIdhI che ane teo siddha puruSa banI gayA che. A zaivapaMthI kApAliko svArthasiddhi mATe tAMtrika mAraNa, mohana, uccATananA abhicAra karatA rahetA. A kApAlikothI sAmAnya loko DaratA rahetA hatA. paraMtu dUradUranA dezothI rAjAo, rAjakumAro, rAjamaMtrIo, zreSThIputro vagere potAnI samasyAo laIne AvatA.1 koInA mATe mA2Naprayoga thatA, koInA mATe mohana-vazIkaraNanA prayoga thatA, koInA mATe uccATananA prayoga thatA. For Private And Personal Use Only 37

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A kApAlikAmAM traNa kApAlika khUba prasiddha hatA. teo jaTAdhArI hovAthI jaTila kahevAtA. emanA ziSyo paNa muMDana nahotA karAvatA. emAM eka pAkhaMDa kApAlika hatA. temanA 500 jaTila ziSyo hatA. bIjA akhaMDa kApAlika hatA, temanA 300 jaTila ziSyo hatA. trIjA pracaMDa kApAlika hatA, temanA 200 ziSyo hatA. A traNa pAkhaMDa-akhaMDa-pracaMDanA nAme prasiddha hatA. temanA zAstrajJAnanI, temanI daivI siddhionI, temanI ugra tapazcaryAnI ane mahAna zaktionI mAlavadezamAM dhAka vAgatI hatI. temane rAjA-mahArAjAo ne zrImaMta zreSThIo svarNa-ratna ane rajatanA DhagalA bheTa ApatA hatA. loko temane mahAna zaktisaMpanna ane mahAcamatkArI mAnatA hatA ane pelA traNeya kApAliko potAne arhat kahevaDAvatA hatA. A traNa kApAliko moTA moTA yajJa karAvatA hatA. temAM magadha, kauzala, vatsa, aMga vagere dezonA zraddhALuo anna, dhRta, ratna, kauzeya, madhu Adi laIne AvatA hatA. tyAre paMdara-paMdara divasonA meLA bharAtA hatA. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir he bhagavatI! jevA ame zaivamaThamAM dAkhala thayA, amAruM pelA traNa pAkhaMDa-akhaMDa ane pracaMDe svAgata karyuM. amArA mastake kaMkunAM tilaka karyAM ane akSatathI vadhAvyA. te pachI amane svAmI aghorAnaMdanI pAse laI javAmAM AvyA. svAmI avorAnaMda potAnA ziSyonI sAthe mRgacarma para beThA hatA. emanuM zarIra bilakula kALuM hatuM. chAtI vizALa hatI. AMkho camakadAra hatI. temaNe kamara para eka sutarAu vastra lapeTeluM hatuM ane teno raMga sarI jevo hato. zarIra para svaccha janoI hatI, mAthe moTI coTI hatI. mArA pitA mahArAja prajApAle be hAtha joDI, mastaka namAvI namra vANImAM kuzalapRcchA karI. 'bhadaMta, AzramamAM koI asuvidhA to nathI ne?' 34 'nahIM, rAjezvara! mAlavapatinA sAmrAjyamAM ame nizciMta chIe. paraMtu...' 'kaho, bhaMte! paraMtu zuM?' 'A rAjakumArIne ahIM kyAreya joI nathI, rAja!' aghorAnaMdajIe mArI tarapha dRSTi karIne kahyuM, 'hA bhaMte, e Aje pahelI vAra ja ApanAM darzane AvI che.' mArA pitAe kahyuM. For Private And Personal Use Only praNA

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mArI icchA A maTha jovAnI hatI ane Aje mahArAjA saparivAra padhAravAnA hatA eTale huM paNa AvI!' AvavAnuM kAraNa batAvyuM. mArI bahena surasuMdarI pAse ja beThI hatI, te bolI : 'bhaMte, mArI A bahena to jinamatamAM zraddhA dharAve che eTale roja suvrataudyAnamAM jAya che. bhagavAna trakaSabhadevanAM darzana-pUjana kare che ane AcArya municandrano upadeza sAMbhaLe che!' mAre mArI mAnyatA na kahevI paDI! sUrasuMdarIe vAta karI dIdhI. aghorAnaMdajI mArI sAme joI rahyA. tyAM pitAjI bolyA : "AcAryazrI municandra paNa mahAna jJAnI ane siddhapuruSa che... teo paNa mokSamArgano ja upadeza Ape che!" mArI baMne mAtAo mauna hatI. baMne jamIna para dRSTi sthira karIne beThI hatI. mahArAjAnI upasthitimAM mArI mAtA lagabhaga mona rahetI hatI paNa surasuMdarI bolakaNI hatI. vaLI te A AzramamAM avAra-navAra AvatI-jatI rahetI hatI. tenuM kAraNa ene zaiva dharma gamato hato ane jaina dharma nahoto gamato, evI vAta na hatI. kharuM kahuM to surasuMdarIne koI dharma gamato na hato! e AzramamAM bIjA prayojanathI AvatI hatI. kurudezamAM zaMkhapurI enI rAjadhAnI hatI. teno rAjA hato damitArI. e damitArI mAlavapatine AdhIna hato. mAlavapati sAthe ghaniSTha saMbaMdha hato eTale avAranavAra te ujjayinI Avato, tenI sAthe teno rAjakumAra aridamana paNa Avato hato. aridamana rUpavAna hato. baLavAna hato. AkarSaka hato. surasuMdarI enA tarapha AkarSAI hatI. aridamana ujjayinImAM Avato tyAre te zaivamaThamAM ja vadhu samaya pasAra karato. e aghorAnaMdajIne paNa priya hato. AzramanA tApaso rAjakumArane mAna ApatA hatA. RSikanyAo paNa tenI sAthe hasatI-ramatI hatI. paMdareka varSanI askuTa kaLI samI sukomaLa kanyA aghorAnaMdajI pAse AvI. teno raMga pAchalA zrAvaNanAM vAdaLAM jevo Acho zAmaLo hato. AMkho mRgabALa jevI caMcaLa, nAcatI ne pramANamAM moTI hatI. svAmInI e nAnI dIkarI hatI. A lADakI, mijAjI ne caMcaLa chokarInI haTha AgaLa AzramamAM saune namavuM paDatuM! paNa tenI nirdoSatA ne nRtyakaLA bane evAM mayaNA 35 For Private And Personal Use Only

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priyaMkara hato ke tenI haThavRtti sau vIsarI jatAM. te AvI, svAmI pAse oTalA para besI gaI. lAgalI ja bolI : "pitAjI, tame joyuM? surasuMdarI.. aridamana sAthe.." e pUruM kare te pahelAM ja kulapati kahe : "tane koNe kahyuM?" mAdhavI koI gupta khajAno pragaTa karatI hoya tema AMkho pahoLI karI dhIrA sAde bolI: kAle rAtre vaMdanRtya pUruM thayuM te pachI huM surasuMdarIne zodhatI zodhatI AvatI hatI tyAM meM pelI navamallikAnA maMDapamAM baMnene aDoaDa UbhelAM joyAM.' vaLI vadhAre dhIrA avAje paNa khUba utsAhathI bolI : "ne pitAjI! teo vaLI AliMgatA hatA!' svAmI nIcI najare kapotone caNAvatA hatA. temaNe UMcuM joyuM. mAdhavInA ramatiyALa caherA para tophAna camakatuM hatuM. pakaDAI gayA eTale rAjakumAra mane kahe : "tuM svAmIne na kahetI. huM ja kahevAno chuM. ame paraNavA mAMgIe chIe! svAmI pachI mahArAjAne bhalAmaNa karaze.' "teM kaMI rAjakumArIne kahyuM na hatuM ne?" kema na kahuM? corI karatAM pakaDAyAM eTale kahevuM to paDe ja ne!' kahI e khilakhilATa hasavA mAMDI. surasuMdarI mAdhavI karatAM pAMca varSe moTI, UMcI, ujvala, svacacha ane sarala hRdayanI rAjakumArI che. AzramamAM e saune madada karatI, saune vahAla karatI, saune AzvAsananA be zabdo kahevA e tatpara rahetI. te kharekhara vAtsalyajharaNI che. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarIne svAmI aghorAnaMdajI upara pUrNa vizvAsa hato ane khAnagImAM kahI paNa rAkheluM ke surasuMdarI mATe yogya rAja kumAra zodhavo. eTale jyAre mAdhavIe vAta karI tyAre svAmI vicAramAM DUbI gayA. "rAjakumArIne chevaTe aridamana gamyo e sAro yuvaka che. zIlavAna mAtAno putra che, baliSTha che, buddhizALI che. vAMdhA jevuM to nathI... te chatAM kyAM rAjakumArI.. maMjarIpuSpa-praphulla zobhAyamAna devadArUnA navavRkSa samI UMcI, sadA nIrA samI sugaMbhIra ne yajJanu samI vatsala mArI rAjaduhitA... ne kyAM aridamana? e baMnene kema sarakhAvAya? vaLI, rAjarANIne A saMbaMdha 36 mayanA For Private And Personal Use Only

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gamaze kharo? nAnA rAjyanA nAnA rAjAno A kumAra che! mAlavapatinI duhitA to rAjagRhI ke vaizAlI... zrAvasti jevAnA rAjamahelomAM zobhe! khera, zuM thAya? yauvana che ne! ane yuvAnono saMsarga thoDo to phaLe ne?' snAna karatAM karatAM svAmIe AvA vicAro karyA. saMdhyA karI, paravArI emaNe surasuMdarInA khabara kaDhAvyA to samAcAra AvyA ke te pachavADenA upavanamAM gaI che. svAmI cAkhaDI paherI te tarapha cAlyA. tADa ne nALiyerInAM pAnathI chAyelA gogRhanI pachavADe AmrakuMjamAM eka AMbAnA morane surasuMdarI cUMTatI hatI. cUMTatAM cUMTatAM morane suMghatI jatI. tenI veNImAM paNa moranI siMdUriyA varNanI kalagI hatI. temAMthI jharelA nAnA nAnA rajakaNo pILAM motInI raja jevA tenI phUlagulAbI garadana para patharAyA hatA. suMdarIe uttarIyano cheDo keDe vIMTALyo hato. khabhe vAMsanI phUlabharelI TopalI hatI. mora cUMTatI e kaMIka gaNagaNatI hatI. svAmI vAtsalyathI suMdarIne joI rahyA. babaDyA : "AnAmAM kazuM apavitra che ja nahIM." suMdarI!" svAmI cheTethI bolyA. AvI, prabho!" kahetI suMdarI hasatI hasatI svAmI pAse AvI. tAre koI vAta karavAnI che, ema mAdhavI kahetI hatI." suMdarInA baMne gAla para saheja ratAza AvI, aMboDAmAM khoselI maMjarI para bhamatI madhamAkhIne uDADatI saheja marakIne lajjAsaha bolI : "huM Apane Aje ja kahevAnI hatI ke huM aridamananI sAthe.' AgaLa te lajjAthI bolI nahIM. joDAvA mAge che ne?" "hA, bhaMte! 'aridamana buddhimAna che, baliSTha che, paNa te tArI mAtAne vAta karI che?' bhaMte, ApanI saMmati meLavIne tene kahevAnI hatI.' svAmIe hasIne kahyuM : "eTale tane e khyAla che ne ke kAma kaThaNa che?' suMdarI mukta rIte hasIne bolI : "e to che ja. paNa mArI mAtAe Apa je iccho temAM koI divase nA pADI che?" 'paNa tArI A chevaTanI pasaMdagI che?" ApanI ane mArI mAtAnI saMmati para nirbhara rAkhyuM che. mArA pitA to mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArI icchA mujaba ja karavAnA che! Apa saMmata thazo ne? meM kazo ya nirNaya karyo nathI. paNa lagna e kevuM moTuM sAhasa che!' 'paraMtu bhUta! aridamanamAM kazI ya khAmI dekhAtI nathI.' te tarkavAna che, buddhimAna ne baliSTha che; paraMtu saMniSTha keTalo che, tenI mane jANa nathI.' RSinA A zabdo sAMbhaLatAM surasuMdarInA caherA paranI badhI ja raMgaprabhA olavAI gaI, jANe udayomukha rakta sUryanuM kALI vAdaLIe grahaNa karyuM. "ApaNe vaLI A aMge vicArIzuM!' RSie surasuMdarIno vAsa thAbaDatAM kahyuM. teo dhIme pagale cAlyA gayA. suMdarI kyAMya sudhI AMbAnI DALa pakaDIne UbhI rahI. pUrapATa jatA azvanI lagAma kheMcAya ne besanAranI dazA thAya tevI surasuMdarInI thaI. te to madhura svapnomAM viharatI hatI. raMgaberaMgI kalpanAcitro te bhAvinA phalaka para AMkI rahI hatI paNa aghorAnaMdajInA zabdothI tenuM mana udAsa thaI gayuM. khabhA parathI phUlonI TopalI nIce sarI paDI. phUlo verAyAM. A to devArzana mATenAM phUlo hatAM! zaMkAkula banIne suMdarI phUla vINavA mAMDI. tene thayuM ke tenuM jIvatara Ama ja verAI javAnuM che, teno to A durdevI saMketa nahoto? ghaDIbhara te dhrujI UThI. paNa pachI svastha thaI svagata bolI : "meM A kaMI anIti karI nathI, durdeva zAnuM pragaTe ? svAmIe kAma kaThaNa che, eTaluM ja kahyuM che. kAma khoTuM che, tema kyAM kahyuM che? mArI mAtAne samajAvavAmAM vAra nahIM lAge. Ama to aridamana vinayanI mUrti che. te sAta bhava sudhI paNa mArI rAha joze ne huM to bhavobhava rAha jaIza.' te navAM phUla vINavA lAgI. tenI kalpanAmAM to aridamananA mAMsala bAhuo, tenuM gaMdhamAdananA zikharasamuM mastaka, teno zAlavRkSanA pATiyA samo vAMso. A badhuM dekhAtuM hatuM. tenuM mana jANe meghadhanuSyanA raMge raMgAtuM jatuM hatuM. AjubAjunI sRSTi para jANe enA navaraMganI bichAta bichAvatI hatI. mayamAM For Private And Personal Use Only

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wu mAlavasamrATa prajApAla acAnaka ja ardhavikSipta thaI gayA hatA, teo rAjamahelamAM ja rahetA hatA. rAjasabhAnuM kAma mahAmaMtrI somadeva saMbhALatA hatA. lagabhaga eka mahinAthI mahArAjA mahelanI bahAra nahotA AvyA. rAjadarabAra bharatA na hatA. moTA bhAge rAtonI rAto teo nagna avasthAmAM khullI talavAra hAthamAM laI ekalA ekalA mahelanA khaMDomAM pharyA karatA hatA. rAjasevako gabharAI gayA hatA. koI paNa vyakti mahArAjAnI AjJA vinA emanI sAme javAnuM sAhasa nahotI karI zakatI. paraMtu chevaTe rAjyanA vayovRddha mahAmaMtrI viSNudhare emanI sAme jaIne abhivAdana karyuM. mahArAjAe khaDga UMcuM karI moTA svare kahyuM : 'tuM cora che. ahIM kema Avyo?' , viSNudhare potAnI maMtrImudrA mahArAjAnA hAthamAM mUkIne kahyuM : 'mahArAjAno jaya ho. Apa mahelanA gupta maMtraNAgRhamAM padhAro. tyAM eka mahA tejasvI saMnyAsI Apane maLavA beThA che.' viSNudhare mahArAjAno hAtha pakaDyo ne temane gupta maMtraNAgRhamAM laI gayA. tyAM traNa kApAliko beThA hatA. pAkhaMDa, akhaMDa ane pracaMDa, mANA Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir akhaMDe mahArAjAnI dRSTi sAthe dRSTi meLavI... thoDI kSaNo trATaka karyuM. mahArAjAno unmAda kaMIka zAMta thayo. akhaMDe viSNudharane saMbodhIne kahyuM : 'mahAmaMtrI! A eka kSudra vyaMtarIno upadrava che. e vyaMtarIe mahArAjAne ardhavikSipta karI dIdhA che.' 'bhaMte, e mATe zuM karavuM joIe?' 'yajJa karavo paDaze... bila Apavo paDaze e vyaMtarIne, tyAre a mahArAjAne choDIne jaze.' 'kevo yajJa, bhaMte?' 'mahAmaMtrI! agnihomamAM niraMtara dhRtadhArA karavI paDaze. ghInA seMkaDo For Private And Personal Use Only 39

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ghaDA joIze. pachI vibhinna vanaspati, phaLa, naivedyanAM seMkaDo bharelAM pAtra joIe. e AgamAM homAze. pachI yajJavedInI pAse dhUpanI cAreya bAju eka moTA vADAmAM deza-dezAntarathI lAvelAM vAcharaDAM, baLada, bheDa vagere pazuone vividha raMgothI raMgavAnAM ane puSpothI zaNagAravAnAM. pachI e pazuonI pUjA karavAnI. temane lIluM lIluM ghAsa khavarAvavAnuM ane pachI e pazuone yajJanI AgamAM homI devAnAM. devatAone, devIone mAMsano havibhaMga arpaNa karyA pachI je mAMsa bace, temAM haraNa, varAha Adi pazuonuM mAMsa meLavavAnuM kaMda-mULa-phaLa-tala, madha, ghI vagere meLavIne 'khAMDavarAga' taiyAra karavAno. e khAMDavarAga vedapAThI brAhmaNo... tApaso, kApAliko vAraMvAra mAgIne khAvAnA! eka-eka devatAnuM AhvAna karIne vividha pazuo, pakSIo, jalacaro ane vRSabhonI Ahuti yajJakuMDamAM ApavAnI hoya che.' brAhmaNa, kSatriyo vagere yajJabalino prasAda zraddhApUrvaka khAze. gRhasthAzramI zrotriya brAhmaNo mATe dUdha, khIra, khIcaDI, mAMsa, vaDAM, sUpa vagere khAnapAna banaze. sAthe sAthe bhuMjAyelA mAMsa sAthe, sonAnAM, cAMdInAM ane ratnonAM pAtromAM madyapAna karaze. pachI nAcaze ke kUdaze! yajJanI A vAta, maMtraNAgRhanI bahAra dvAra pAse UbhelI rANI rUpasuMdarI sAMbhaLI rahI hatI. teNe maMtraNAgRhamAM praveza karyo ke mahAmaMtrI viSNudhara UbhA thaI gayA. mahArANIne besavA mATe sukhAsana ApyuM. traNeya kApAliko rUpasuMdarIne joI rahyA. A mahArANI rUpasuMdarI che.' mahAmaMtrIe kApAlikone paricaya Apyo. akhaMDa kApAlike pUchyuM : "mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarI nathI padhAryA?" AvI rahyAM che. mahAmAtya somadeva paNa AvI rahyA che.' "mahArAjA para AsurI zaktino prabhAva che, tethI teo ardhavikSipta banyA che. temane sArA karavA mATe yajJa karavAnI vAta A traNa siddhapuruSo karI rahyA che.' "A rAjamahelamAM hiMsaka yajJa nahIM thaI zake.' mahArANI rUpasuMdarIe gaMbhIratAthI kahyuM. to pachI?' viSNudhara bolyA. 40 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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'jemAM jIvahiMsA na thavAnI hoya tevo upAya zodhavo joIe." tyAM saubhAgyasuMdarIe maMtraNAgRhamAM praveza karyo. mahAmaMtrIe rUpasuMdarInI pAse ja sukhAsana ApyuM. saubhAgyasuMdarIe gRhamAM pravezatAM ja rUpasuMdarInI vAta sAMbhaLI hatI. teNe kahyuM : 'upacAra koI paNa hoya, hiMsaka ke ahiMsaka, mahArAjAne sAruM thaI javuM joIe." 'paNa te mATe sarvaprathama ahiMsaka upacAro karavA joIe. te aMge rAjavaidya mohanagirinI salAha laIe. bIjA paNa najIkanA rAjyonA kuzaLa vaidyone bolAvIne upacAro karIe, jo ethI sAruM thaI jAya.' paNa A zArIrika roga nathI, mahArANI!' akhaMDa kApAlika bolyo : A devI upadrava che. mATe vaidyo Ano upacAra na karI zake...' to pachI evA mAMtrikone bolAvI lAvIe ke jeo maMtrazaktithI devI upadrava dUra karI zake. temAM koI jIvanI hiMsA na thAya!' 'paraMtu mahAdevI, yajJo to sarvatra thAya che. magadhamAM thAya che, zrAvastimAM thAya che, caMpAmAM thAya che... aMgadezamAM thAya che... ghaNA badhA rAjAmahArAjAo moTA moTA yajJa kare che... moTA zreSThIo... brAhmaNo kare 'bhale karatA hoya, paNa te kyAreya upAdeya nathI. jIvahiMsA pApa ja che. dharmanA nAme jIvahiMsA karavI narI ajJAnatA che.' paraMtu brAhmaNagraMthomAM ane te pachI zrautasUtromAM yajJasabaMdhI balidAnonI vistArapUrvaka vyAkhyA che... zatapatha ane taittirIya brAhmaNomAM paNa somavAdamAM aja (bakaro), gAya, azva Adi pazuono vadha karI emanA mAMsanuM yajana karavAnuM vidhAna che! are, bRhadAraNyaka upaniSadamAM lakhyuM che ke, "koI icche ke mAro putra vidvAna, vijayI ane badhA vedono jJAtA thAya", to teNe baLadanA mAMsamAM cokhA-pulAva-ghI nAMkhIne khAvuM joIe. akhaMDa kApAlike brAhmaNagraMthono havAlo Apyo. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarIno ratha zaivamaThamAM pravezyo. maThanA tApasakumAro tathA tApasakumArikAoe rANInuM svAgata karyuM. rANI rathamAMthI UtarIne sIdhI ja svAmI aghorAnaMdajInI vizALa kuTiramAM cAlI gaI. mahArANIe svAmIne praNAma karyA. mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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svAmIe mahArANIne AzIrvAda ApyA : 'bhadra! tArA AgamananuM prayojana mane jANavA maLyuM che. mahArAjAne daivI upadravathI ardhavikSiptatA prApta thaI che ane e mATe rAjamahelamAM hiMsaka yajJa na thAya, e vAta mane paNa jacI che...' bhale, to pachI maMtrazaktithI ke bIjA koI upAyathI mahArAjAne sAruM thaI jAya, tema karavuM joIe ne?' hA bhagavatI, e upAya karI zakAya. huM prayatna karI jouM!" prayatna? eTale sAruM na paNa thAya?' A badhI vAto devI che. devI zaktio samAna nathI hotI. je devIe A upadrava karyo che, tenI zakti bIjI devInI zaktithI ochI hoya to upadrava zAMta thaI zake.' prabho! Apa to sarvazaktisaMpanna cho..." devI, sarvazaktisaMpanna to eka mAtra Izvara che. bIjA badhA to apUrNa ja che. chatAM huM prayatna karuM chuM.' saubhAgyasuMdarIne saMtoSa na thayo. te UbhI thaI. svAmIne praNAma karI te kuTiramAMthI bahAra nIkaLI. tyAM eka muni kumAre pAse AvIne kahyuM : "bhagavatI, Apane akhaMDa kApAlika yAda kare che.' saubhAgyasuMdarI munikumAra sAthe akhaMDa kApAlika pAse pahoMcI. rANIe praNAma karIne pUchyuM : deva! mane kema yAda karI?" jo tamArI icchA hoya to mahArAjAne nirAmaya karavA mATe ame ahIM A AzramamAM yajJa karIe! yajJamAM Avazyaka sAmagrInI vyavasthA mahAmaMtrI viSNudhara karI zakaze. mahelamAM koIne khabara nahIM paDe..." bhaMte, mahelamAM to khabara nahIM paDe, paNa ahIM AzramamAM svAmI gurudevane to khabara paDaze ne? teo yajJa na thAya, ema icche che." rANInI vAta sAMbhaLIne akhaMDa kApAlikanA mukha para nirAzAnuM vAdaLa chavAI gayuM. aMte, Apa ciMtA na karo. svAmI emanI rIte maMtraprayogathI mahArAjAne kaSTamukta karaze, evI mane zraddhA che.' rANI rathamAM besI rAjamahelamAM AvI gaI. rAjamahelamAM mahArAjA 42 For Private And Personal Use Only

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prajApAla ardhavikSipta avasthAmAM bUmAbUma karatA hatA. hAthamAMthI talavAra choDatA na hatA, zarIra pa2 ekeya vastra rAkhatA na hatA. emanA khaMDanAM dvAra baMdha rAkhavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. bahAra mahAmAtya somadeva ciMtAgrasta cahere beThA hatA. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarIe AvIne mahAmAtyane zaivamaThamAM thayelI vAta kahI saMbhaLAvI. mahAdevI, ApaNane pariNAma kyAre jovA maLaze? keTalo samaya rAha jovAnI? mahArAjAne jema bane tema jaladI sAruM thavuM joIe...' Aja rAta sudhI rAha joIe...' rANIe kahyuM. bhale.. rAta sudhImAM sAruM thaI jAya to ciMtA TaLe...' rANI rUpasuMdarIne paNa A samAcAra maLyA. teNe mane kahyuM : "mayaNA! AjanI rAta sudhI rAha jovAnI che. joke mAruM mana to kahe che ke A kAma zaivamaThamAM thavAnuM nathI. A kAma gurudevazrI municandra ja karI zakaze. teo jJAnI to che ja; mahAna mAMtrika che, mahAna tAMtrika che. emanI pAse ghaNI siddhio che. paNa teo sAce ja niHspRha che. nirlepa che eTale siddhionA prayoga nathI karatA. chatAM jinazAsananI prabhAvanA mATe je kaMI karavuM paDe, te teo kare ja evI mArI zraddhA che." mayaNa 43 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ri rAta vItI gaI. mahArAjAnI sthiti vadhu bagaDI gaI. mahAmAtya somadeve rANI rUpasuMdarIne kahyuM : 'mahAdevI! have gurudeva municandrasUrijIne vinaMtI karIne, A upadrava dUra karavAno upAya karavo joIe.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'cAlo, ApaNe gurudeva pAse jaIe.' zaivamaThanA mAMtriko, tAMtriko, kApAliko mahArAjAnA daivI upadravane zAMta nahotA karI zakyA. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarI nirAza thaI gayAM hatAM. temanI zraddhA hacamacI UThI hatI. mArI mAtA mahAmAtya sAthe suvrata-udyAnamAM pahoMcI. bhagavAna RSabhadevanA prAsAdamAM jaI prabhuvaMdanA-stavanA karI gurudevanI pAse gayAM. gurudevane vidhivat vaMdanA karI rANI ane mahAmAtya yogya sthAne beThAM, 'gurudeva! Ape jANyuM to che ja ke mahArAjA daivI upadravathI ardhavikSipta dazAmAM ribAI rahyA che. e upadrava Apa ja dUra karI zako ema cho. Apa koI upAya' ** 'mahAmAtya! mahArAjA mAlavadezanA prajApriya samrATa che. teo dezanA ne prajAnA, samAjanA ne dharmanA AdhAra che. tame ciMtA nA karo.' 'gurudeva, vaidyoe uttama auSadhothI upacAra karyA, paNa sAruM na thayuM.' mAMtrikoe maMtraprayogo karyA, paNa sAruM na thayuM. * gotradevInI vRddha strIoe bAdhAo karI che... * snehIjanoe tIrthayAtrAnI bAdhAo karI che... brAhmaNoe DAkaNa-zAkaNone bali-bAkaLA ApyA che... chatAM mahArAjAne sAruM nathI thayuM... mahArANI rUpasuMdarIno dRDha vizvAsa che ke gurudeva municandrasUri ja A prabaLa daivI upadravane zAMta karI zakaze. For Private And Personal Use Only maNA

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AcAryadevanA mukha para smita pharakI gayuM. 'mahAmAtya! tame jaI zako cho. ame rAjamahele AvIe chIe!" AcAryazrI municandra, muni siddhezvaranI sAthe rAjamahelamAM padhAryA. rAjaparivAra ane maMtrIgaNe temanuM svAgata karyuM. AcArya, siddhezvaranI sAthe sIdhA ja mahArAjAnA khaMDamAM gayA. khaMDa aMdarathI baMdha karyo. mahArAjA bebhAna thaIne paDelA hatA. AcArya potAnA jeta Asana para dhyAnastha thayA. temaNe yogabaLathI jANI lIdhuM ke A devI upadrava che. dhyAnapUrNa karIne temaNe siddhezvarane kahyuM ke A badho upadrava vyaMtaradevano che. rAjAe devIne pazubali Apyo nathI, tethI devI roSe bharAI che. devI mizrAdaSTi che.' muni siddhezvara maMtravidyAmAM pAraMgata hatA. teo gurudevanI vAta samajI gayA. khaMDano daravAjo kholIne mahAmAtya somadevane aMdara bolAvIne kahyuM : "Aje ame mahalanA ja eka ekAMta khaMDamAM rokAIzuM. madhyarAtrinA samaye phaLa, puSpa, naivedya Adi bali ApIne koI vIra-nirbhIka puruSane amArI pAse mokalajo.' nagaranI kuLadevInuM maMdira rAjamahelathI thoDe dUra kSiprA nadInA taTa para AveluM hatuM. madhyarAtrie tyAM javAnuM hatuM. sUcanA mujaba rAtre balino thALa laIne eka paDachaMda puruSa AcArya pAse AvI gayo. siddhezvare AvanAra mANasa ke jenuM nAma jayarAja hatuM. tene kahyuM: "ApaNe ahIMthI sIdhA tapatIdevInA maMdira tarapha javAnuM che. mArI sAthe ja cAlaje. jarAya gabharAyA vinA cAlaje.' mahArAja! tame kahezo to kALiyA bhUta sAthe meM laDIza. huM rAkSasathI ya Darato nathI!" jayarAje potAnI vAMkaDiyA mUcho para hAtha pheravyo. siddhezvaranA mukha para smita ramI gayuM. rAjamahelanA killAnA daravAje pahoMcyA. tyAM mahAmAnya somadeva pote hAjara hatA. teo gurudevanA pagamAM paDayA. cokIdAre daravAjAnI bArI kholI nAMkhI. bArI vATe gurudeva, siddhezvara ane jayarAja bahAra nIkaLI gayA. bArI baMdha thaI gaI. bahAra nIkaLatAM ja siddhezvare eka bhayAnaka dRzya joyuM. mayaNa 45 For Private And Personal Use Only

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cakalAonuM ToLuM ane ati karkaza avAja! gurudeva Adi traNeyane e ToLAe gherI lIdhA. turta ja siddhezvara munie jayarAjane kahyuM : 'bali-bAkaLA uchALa!' jayarAje be muThThI bharIne bAkaLA uchALyA. cakalAonuM ToLuM adRzya thaI gayuM. AgaLa cAlyA. thoDuMka cAlyA ane hUkuM hUk... karatA pILA moDhAvALA vAMdarAonuM ToLuM sAme maLyuM. vAMdArAo gherI vaLe e pahelAM ja siddhezvare jayarAjane kahyuM : 'jayarAja! mArA hAthamAM cokhA Apa.' jayarAje cokhA ApyA. siddhezvare e cokhA abhimaMtrita karIne vAMdarAo upara pheMkyA. vAMdarAo adRzya thaI gayA. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir have teo tapatIdevInA maMdira tarapha jhaDapathI cAlyA. maMdira thoDuMka ja dUra hatuM, tyAM moTA yamarAja jevA bilADAonuM jaMgI ToLuM sAme AvatuM joyuM. siddhezvare jayarAjane kahyuM : 'jayarAja, lAla raMganAM phUlo A bilADAo sAme pheMk!' jayarAje pheMkyAM ne bilADAo jANe havAmAM ogaLI gayA! traNeya jaNA devInA maMdiranI sAme AvIne UbhA. AcAryadeve maMdiranA toraNa AgaLa UbhA rahI 'sUrimaMtra'nuM dhyAna karyuM. siddhezvara muni bolyA : 'hai tapatIdevI! moTAmoTA asuro jemanA paganI raja potAnA mAthe caDhAve che te A municandrasUrino AdarasatkAra kara. tArA mahAna puNyano udaya che ke AvA lokottara puruSa tArA atithi banyA che!' tyAM adRzya rahelI vyaMtaradevInuM aTTahAsya saMbhaLAyuM. dharatI dhrUjI UThI. maMdira dhaNadhaNI UThyuM. paraMtu guru-ziSyanuM eka ruMvADuMya nA pharakyuM. jayarAja paNa aDIkhama Ubho hato. 46 devI pragaTa thaI. raudra-bhayaMkara rUpa karyuM. lAMbI lAMbI jIbha kADhI AcAryanI samakSa cALA pADavA lAgI. AcAryadeva to dhyAnamAM lIna hatA paNa siddhezvare trADa pADIne kahyuM : 're duSTa devI! tuM mArA gurudevanuM apamAna kare che? mArI zaktinI zuM tane khabara nathI? huM tane zAMtithI samajAvuM chuM eTale tuM A badhA cALA kare che? zuM tuM amane DarAve che? to have joI le mAro camatkAra!' siddhezvara munie be paga pahoLA karyA. be hAtha kamara para TekavyA. For Private And Personal Use Only zamaNA

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ane moTethI hU... ... huM... karato huMkAra karyo. AkhuM maMdira dhrujavA lAgyuM. bIjA huMkAra karyo ane maMdiranI badhI devIo khaMbhita thaI gaI. jANe citramAM cItarelI na hoya! munie trIjo huMkAra karyo. huMkAra thatAMnI sAthe ja tapatIdevI bhayabhIta thaIne UchaLI! UchaLIne sIdhI AcAryane pagamAM paDI. tharathara dhrujatI devI be hAtha joDI AjIjI karavA lAgI : "huM ApanAM caraNonI dAsI chuM. Apa kaho te karavA taiyAra chuM." siddhezvara munie kahyuM : "mahArAjA prajApAlane teM saMmohita karyA che. ardhavikSipta karyA che, temane mukta kara ane sUridevanI sevA kara." devI bolI : "munirAja, rAjAnA zarIranA bhItarathI TukaDA karavAmAM AvyA che, have choDavAnuM zuM prayojana che? teo jIvI nahIM zake." munirAje kahyuM : "devI, A tArI cAlabAjI che. tArI cAlabAjI huM jANuM chuM. tuM jyAM sudhI mahArAjAne tArA sakaMjAmAMthI nahIM choDe tyAM sudhI huM tane nahIM choDuM.' devI gabharAI gaI. ene lAgyuM ke lokhaMDanI sAMkaLathI baMdhAI gaI che ane tene koI karavatathI kApatuM hoya, evI ghora pIDA thavA lAgI. te cIsa pADavA lAgI. tyAM siddhezvare siMhanAda karyo, dharatI dhrujI UThI. AkhuM nagara jAgI gayuM. "zuM thayuM? zuM thayuM?' bolatAM loko gharanI bahAra nIkaLI AvyA, sahu gabharAI gayAM. mahArAjAne vaLagelI tapatIcaMtarInI DAkaNo-zAkaNo paNa DarI gaI. te badhI doDIne tapatIdevInI pAse AvI. tyAM AvatAM ja siddhezvare te badhI DAkaNa-zAkaNone maMtrazaktithI bAMdhI dIdhI. tyAMthI jarAya khasI nA zake e rIte jamIna sAthe coMTADI dIdhI. siddhezvare kahyuM : 're duSTAo! mahArAjAne satAvavAnuM baMdha karI, nahitara huM tamane choDIza nahIM." DAkaNonA zarIramAM ekasAthe hajAra-hajAra bhAlA bhoMkAtA hoya, tevI ghora vedanA thavA lAgI. temanI AMkho bhayathI vyAkuLa thaI gaI. siddhezvaranA bhayathI tharathara kaMpavA lAgI. siddhezvare garjanA karatAM pUchyuM : "bolo DAkaNo! zuM vicAra che mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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tamAro? mahArAjAne mukta karavA che ke nahIM?" rotI-kakaLatI DAkaNoe kahyuM : "he munirAja! amane kSamA karo. ame tamArA bhakta rAjAne choDI daIe chIe. paraMtu pahelAM amane mukta karo.' nA re nA, tame mane chetarI nA zako. tamArA jevI DAkaNo para huM vizvAsa na kare. pahelAM mahArAjAne mukta karo. tamane ATaluM duHkha thAya che to mahArAjAne keTaluM duHkha thatuM haze? haju mAnI jAo. nahitara narakanI vedanA ahIM ja sahevI paDaze. jamIna para mAthAM pachADI-pachADIne marI jazo!' munivara! amArI vedanAno pAra nathI. ame mahArAjAne mukta karIe chIe. have ame pazunuM balidAna nahIM mAMgIe. A AcAryadevanuM zaraNa laIe chIe. kRpA karI amane mukta karo.' are DAkaNo! tamAre AvA paropakArI puruSanuM rakSaNa karavuM joIe ke bhakSaNa? tame jaina dharmanA dayAdharmane mAna. gurudevanI sevA karo. jAo, tame mukta cho!' badhI devIo AcAryadevanA page paDI. tapatIdevIe paNa AcAryanA page paDI jaina dharma svIkAryo. badhI devIo potapotAnA sthAne cAlI gaI. tyAM rAjamahelamAMthI samAcAra AvI gayA. mahAmAtya somadeva svayaM AvyA ane kahyuM : "gurudeva! mahArAjA svastha banyA che. temanI vikSiptatA dUra thaI che. temanI vedanA zAMta thaI gaI che.' siddhezvara munie jayarAjane kahyuM : "jayarAja! have badhAM phaLa ane nevaMgha tapatIdevIne dharAvI de.' jayadeva devInI AgaLa thALa mUkI dIdho. gurudeve kahyuM : "ApaNe ahIMthI sIdhA suvrata-udyAnamAM javAnuM che.' traNeya udyAnamAM pAchA AvyA. jayarAje siddhezvara munine kahyuM : gurudeva! mane tamAro ziSya banAvI ne AvI maMtra-vidyAo mane Apo.. huM paNa AvAM paropakAranAM kAma karI zakuM! gurudeve tene AzIrvAda ApyA, te potAnA ghera gayo. 48 mANa For Private And Personal Use Only

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bIjA divase savAre rAjamahelanA vizALa prAMgaNamAM vAjiMtro vAgavA mAMDyAM hatAM. rAjapuruSo ane nagarazreSThIo rAjamahelamAM AvI rahyA hatA. ratha, pAlakhI ane azvo zaNagArAI rahyAM hatAM. yuvAna kanyAo suMdara vastro paherI gIta gAi rahI hatI. sarvatra harSa hiloLe caDhyAM hato. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir nagaramAM jAhera thayuM hatuM ke mahArAjAno daivI upadrava dUra thayo che. jainAcArya municandrasUrinA parama prabhAvathI, teonI apUrva maMtrazaktithI mahArAjA upadrava-mukta thayA che. samagra rAjaparivAra sAthe, zreSThIgaNa sAthe ane sAmaMta rAjAo sAthe, hAthI, 2tha, ghoDA ane pAlakhI sAthe mahArAjA bhagavAna RSabhadeva-prasAdamAM ane pachI gurudeva AcAryazrI municandrasUrinAM darzana mATe padhArI rahyA hatA. ujjayinInA rAjamArgo para sugaMdhI jalano chaMTakAva thaI rahyo hato. Thera Thera suMdara toraNo baMdhAI rahyAM hatAM. lokonA mukhe jaina dharmanI prazaMsA thaI rahI hatI. AcArya municandrasUrinAM guNagAna gavAI rahyAM hatAM. bIjI bAju zaivamaThamAM sannATo chavAI gayo hato. maThamAM udAsInatA gherAI AvI hatI. zaivadharmIonAM moDhAM kALAM paDI gayAM hatAM. jANe ke temanAthI jaina dharmanAM utkarSa sahana nahoto thato. tethI teo mauna hatA. vAtAvaraNa ane rAjamahela jaina dharmathI prabhAvita hatAM. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarI paNa mahArAjAnI sAthe rathamAM besI gayAM hatAM. surasuMdarI mArI sAthe rathamAM beThI hatI. Aje pahelI ja vAra e rANI ane rAjakumArI RSabhaprAsAdamAM AvI rahI hatI. pahelI javAra gurudeva municandrasUrinAM darzane AvI rahI hatI. zobhAyAtrA ujjayinInA rAjamArgo para thaIne RSabhaprAsAde pahoMcI. mahArAjA vagere samagra rAjaparivAra prAsAdamAM pravezyo. paMDita subuddhi mahArAjAnI pAse AvI.naM UbhA. temaNe paramAtmAnI stutiprArthanA karI-karAvI. phaLa, puSpa, naivedya, dhRpa vagere mahArAjA pAse samarpaNa karAvIne pachI pAMca dIpa pragaTAvI AratI karAvI. caNA mArA hRdayamAM AnaMdano udadhi ghUghavatAM hatAM. mArA pagamAM jhaNajhaNATI vyApI gaI hatI. nRtya karavA mana thanaganI UThyuM hatuM. For Private And Personal Use Only F

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paraMtu maMdiramAM nRtya karavAnI jagA ja na hatI! samagra maMdira ane bahArano parisara lokothI khIcokhIca bharAI gayo hato. AratI pUrNa thaI. mahArAjA maMdiranI bahAra AvyA ane jyAM AcAryadava municandrasUri birAjamAna hatA tyAM gayA. prajAe gurudevano jayajayakAra karyo. mahArAjAe gurudevanAM caraNomAM sASTAMga praNAma karyA. gurudeve mAthe hAtha mUkIne "dharmalAbhanA AzIrvAda ApyA. baMne rANIo, ame be rAjakumArIo, mahAmAya, maMtrImaMDaLa, nagara-zreSThIo, sAmaMta rAjAo ane hajAro prajAjano suvrata-udyAnamAM besI gayAM. gurudeve eka ghaTikAparyata dharmopadeza Apyo. sabhAnuM visarjana thayuM. rAjaparivAra besI rahyo. mahArAjAe gadgad svare kahyuM : gurudeva! Apano upakAra huM kyAreya nahIM bhUlI zakuM. Ape mArA para ne mArA parivAra para parama kRpA karI!" rAjanuM! tame to prajAnA AdhAra cho! dharmanA paNa AdhAra cho. sAdhu-saMtonA Apa bhakta che. ApanI rakSA karavI e amAruM kartavya che." gurudeva, mArA yogya kAryasevAnI AjJA pradAna karo." rAjezvara! tamArA rAjyamAM prajA AnaMdathI jIve che. dareka dharmAvalaMbI nirvighnapaNe pota-potAnA dharmanuM pAlana kare che... kaho, AnAthI vizeSa zuM joIe?" te chatAM koI viziSTa kartavya jJAtavya hoya.." eka kAma karavuM joIe." AjJA karo, bhaMte!" 'hiMsaka yajJo baMdha karAvavA joIe." mahArAjAe mahAmAtya sAme joyuM. mahAmAtye UbhA thaI kahyuM : bhagavaMta! mAlavadezamAM jAheramAM koI hiMsaka yajJa nahIM thAya, enI huM khAtarI ApuM chuM." bahu saMtoSa thayo, bhadra! jIvone abhayadAna ApavAthI prajAnuM puNya vadhaze." mahArAjA UbhA thayA. gurudevane vaMdana karI sahu mahela tarapha ravAnA thayAM. huM tyAM ja eka tarapha UbhI rahI gaI. mArI mAtAne pa0 acaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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meM izArAthI - saMkatathI samajAvI dIdhuM ke huM moDI AvIza. mAre gurudeva sAthe thoDI vAto karavI hatI ane sahunA gayA pachI huM mArI sakhI lalitAMnI sAthe gurudeva pAse gaI. e divase mAre batrIze koThe dIvA pragaTI gayA hatA. mArI pAMpaNe harSanAM toraNo baMdhAI gayAM hatAM. meM gurudevane zaivamaThamAM thayelI vAtothI jJAta karyA. IrSyAthI prerita thaI kApAliko koI upadrava na karI jAya, te mATe sAvadhAna karyA. gurudeve kahyuM: subhage! tuM jarA ya ciMtA nA karIza. e badhA kApAlikone ghoLIne pI jAya evo mAro siddhezvara muni che! vaLI bhagavAna RSabhadevanI parama kRpA che... ame nirbhaya chIe.' huM saMtuSTa thaI. sakhI sAthe tyAMthI nIkaLI mahele pahoMcI. maya pa1 For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArI sAsu rANI kamalaprabhA rasapUrvaka mArI vAto sAMbhaLI rahyAM hatAM. mArA pati zrIpAla paNa mugdhabhAve Azcaryacakita netra mArI vAtomAM tanmaya thaI jatA hatA. meM kahyuM : eka divasa kSiprAnA taTa para eka lIsI caTTAna para jaIne huM mArI sakhI lalitA sAthe beThI hatI. dUra dUra TekarIonI pAchaLa koI navayauvanAnA bhAlapradezamAM rahelA kumakuma tilaka samo sUrya adazya thato jato hato. nagaranA vanapradeza para grISmanI sAMjano vAyu vyAkuLa banI, AmravRkSomAM thaIne vAto hato. nadInA tIra para dhenu cAratA govALiyAoe have baMsIo baMdha karI hatI. godhaNa nagara tarapha dhasatuM hatuM. mAruM mana mArA atItamAM bhamI rahyuM hatuM. mAro janma rAjamahelamAM.. rAjarANInI kUkhe thayo... kema rAjarANInI kukhe thayo? kema huM janmathI ja rAjakumArI kahevAI? mAro janmotsava thayo hato. mane mAtAnA... pachI pitAnA... pachI svajana-parijanonA pyAra-dulAra maLyA hatA. suMdara ne sugaThita zarIra! paripUrNa pAMca indriyo! apsarA jevuM rUpa ane moralInA sUra jevo svara! zreSTha vastro ane ati mUlyavAna alaMkAro! maNi-ratnothI jaDAyeluM pAraNuM ane ghUgharIothI gUMthelI rezamadorI! jhulAvanArI mArI mAtA mAlavapatinI rAjamahiSI! A badhAM sukhanAM sAdhana maLyAM hatAM. keTaluM badhuM sukha? badhuM ja sukha! mane ekeya duHkha yAda AvatuM nathI. Aje ATalI moTI thaI chuM, paNa kyAreya huM vyAdhigrasta banI nathI. kyAreya apamAnita nathI thaI.. kyAreya koIe mArI AjJA avagaNI nathI. mArI badhI ja icchAo pUrI thaI che ne thaI rahI che! kyAreka huM sukhano unmAda anubhavuM chuM! kyAreka mane vicAra Ave che ke A duniyAmAM mArA jevI sukhI bIjI koI strI haze kharI? pa2 mayANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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paNa... A badhAM sukho mane mArA AcarelA dharmanA prabhAve ja maLyAM che! pUrvenA janmamAM... bhavomAM dharmapuruSArtha karyo haze.. e karmapuruSArthathI puNyakarmo baMdhAyAM haze, e puNyakarmo A bhavamAM phaLI rahyAM haze ne! puNyathI ja sukha maLe - e siddhAMta sAcI che ne huM mAnuM chuM. dareka dharmo mAne che. puNyakarma baMdhAya che dharmathI ja! manathI, vacanathI ane kAyAthI karelA dharma puNyakarmono saMcaya karAve che. meM pUrvajamomAM jIvo pratye dayA-karuNA karI haze. koI jIvone haNyA nahIM hoya, dubhavyA nahIM hoya, du:khI nahIM karyA hoya! huM asatya bolI nahIM houM... kaDavAM vacana nahIM kahyAM hoya, sAcuM ane hitakArI bolI hoIza. corI nahIM karI hoya.. durAcAra nahIM sevyA hoya... supAtradAna dIdhuM haze, anukaMpA karI haze... zIla dharmanuM pAlana karyuM haze. nAnI-moTI tapazcaryA karI haro! gurujanono vinaya karyo haze. glAna-ruNa janonI sevA karI haze... mAtA-pitA ane vRddhajanono Adara karyo haze." paramAtmAnI bhakita karI haze. tIrthonI yAtrAo karI haze. Avo badho dharmapuruSArtha jarUra karyo haze! to ja mane janmathI mAMDIne Aja yauvananA ubare paga mUkatAM sudhImAM sukha ja sukha maLyuM che! rUpa, sauMdarya ane lAlitya maLyuM che! susvara, saubhAgya ane yaza maLyo che! ( zreSTha dharma, sAcA guru ane vizuddha paramAtmatattva maLyuM che! mArA vicAronI avirata dhArA vahI rahI hatI ane mArI sakhI bolI UThI: mayaNA, kyAranI tuM zuM vicArI rahI che? kyAranAM ApaNe baMne mauna besI rahyAM chIe! aMdhAruM UtarI AvyuM che. have UThIe ahIMthI... mahela tarapha jaIe." huM jANe svapnamAMthI jAgI... lalitA sAme joI rahI... tarata ja UbhI thaI. lalitAno hAtha pakaDIne kahyuM : cAla, ApaNe mahelamAM jaIe!" ame baMne mAnapaNe cAlatI rAjamahelamAM pahoMcI. huM lalitAne vidAya karI mArI mAtAnA zayanakhaMDamAM cAlI gaI. mArI mA rANI rUpasuMdarI UMcI che, sazakta che ane sukezI che! UgatA aruNanI ayo pa3 For Private And Personal Use Only

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prabhA jevuM enuM mukha che! aSTamInA candra jevuM enuM bhAla che ane aMbajapAMkhaDI jevI enI AMkhaDIo che. gauravarNI mArI mA, divasanI kumudinInI jema popacAM DhALIne dhyAnamagna beThI hatI. huM enI pAse jaIne dhabba karatI besI gaI. teNe mArI sAme joyuM. mArA mukha para smita UbharAyuM. AMkho nAcI UThI ne bolI paDI mArI mA! tuM keTalI badhI suMdara che! brahmAe tane ghaDavAmAM ghaNo samaya lagADyo haze, nahIM?' enA be gAla mArA be hAthamAM dabAvyA. teNe mArA hAtha choDAvIne kahyuM : 'mayaNA, tArA pitA ahIM AvyA hatA..." Ave ja ne! tArI pAse." mArI vAta sAMbhaLa, tArI zarArata hamaNAM baMdha! "prakAzo, mahArANI!" Aje temaNe kahyuM ke mayaNA ane surA, baMne putrIo moTI thaI che. yauvanamAM pravezI che. vaLI temanuM adhyayana paNa pUruM thayuM che. eTale rAjasabhAmAM tamane baMne bahenone bolAvavI ane tamArA jJAnanI tathA buddhinI parIkSA levI. rAjasabhAmAM tamAruM baMne bahenonuM mAna vadhe, tamArI zobhA vadhe, kIrti phelAya... ane tamane baMnene yogya... vara maLI jAya! ema ja ne?' hA, rAjakumArI yauvanamAM praveze eTale mAtA-pitAnuM e kartavya bane che. suyogya varanI pasaMdagI karavAnI... enI zodha karavAnI.' ThIka che mA, A to saMsArano anAdikALathI cAlyo Avato krama che... bAkI, AvI badhI vAto to te te jIvanAM karmone AdhAre banatI rahetI hoya che. khera, rAjasabhAmAM amArI parIkSA levAno kyo divasa nakkI thayo che?" tame be baheno jyAre kaho tyAre, tamAre parIkSA ApavAnI taiyArI karavI paDaze ne!' ApaNe to pratidina taiyAra chIe! atyAre tAre parIkSA levI hoya to atyAre besI jaIe! hA, surAne pUchavuM paDe." AvatI kAle surAne pUchIne divasa nakkI karI laIe." bhale mA!' huM UbhI thaI. mArA zayanakhaMDamAM gaI. pa4. mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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Aje mArI mAtAe mane eNka navo vicAra Apyo hato. meM kyAreya vara aMge vicAreluM na hatuM. mane Azcarya thayuM hatuM, ghaNuM Azcarya thayuM hatuM ke meM kyAreya lagna aMge vicAryuM na hatuM! Aje mArI mAtAe varanI pasaMdagI karavAnI, varanI zodha karavAnI vAta karI hatI. mAruM mana thoDuM caMcaLa banyuM... mane mAruM rUpa jovAnuM mana thayuM. zaNagAra sajavAnI icchA jAgI ane tarata ja icchAne kAryAnvita karI. meM mArA DAbA hAthamAM hIrAnI camakatI bAra baMgaDIo paherI. jamaNA hAthamAM sonAnuM nakazIdAra kaDuM paheryuM gulAbI raMgano caNiyo paheryo. tenI kaLIe kaLIe sonerI kasabanI UbhI paTTIo coDelI hatI. enA gharamAM kasaba bharelAM gulAba kaMDArelAM hatAM. zarIra para pAradarzaka AchA pILA raMganI oDhaNI nAMkhI. caNiyAnA raMganI ja coLI paherI. kamara para sonAnI seromAM gUMthelo kaMdoro bAMdhyo. temAM aMtare aMtare goLAkAra cAMdalAmAM jaDelAM nIlama, mANeka ane hIrAnA buTTA jANe ApameLe ojasa veratAM hoya tema camakatAM hatAM. A kaMdorAne lIdhe huM vadhu mahika lAgatI hatI. mArA hoTha paravALA jevA lAla hatA. caherA para lAlI chavAyelI hatI, kAjaLamaDhI AMkhomAM cokhkhI saphedI camakatI hatI. meM mArA vALa eka seramAM gUMcyA hatA. e sera mArI chAtI para ramatI hatI... A badhuM meM mArA zayanakhaMDamAM jaDAyelA moTA arIsA sAme UbhA rahIne joyuM hatuM. meM mArA suzobhita dehane joyo hato! e jotAM jotAM mArA hoTha para mAdaka bhInAza chavAI hatI. chAtImAM jANe zvAsa bharAI gayo hato. pIThamAM magarUbI dekhAtI hatI ane nitaMbamAM avarNanIya custAI AvI hatI... huM thoDo samaya stabdha banIne joI rahI. pahelI ja vAra AvI ghelachA UThI hatI. zayanakhaMDamAM huM ekalI ja hatI. mane lAgyuM ke koI rAjakumAra divya zaktithI atyAre mArA zayanakhaMDamAM AvI jAya to mane joIne pAgala thaI jAya... mane upADI jAya enA dezamAM ane mane paraNavA mArA pagamAM ALoTI paDIne prArthanA kare! ane kharekhara huM svapnalokamAM UtarI paDI. aho devI! mAlavadezanI rAjabAlAnuM A devakumAra abhivAdana che.' kare mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #65
sAMbhaLIne huM deza-kALanuM bhAna bhUlI gaI. mArI palako DhaLI gaI. huM stabdha banelI UbhI rahI... tyAM e kumAra bolyo : 'saMkoca na rAkho. devakumAra tamArI sevAmAM che. AjJA karo.' Adeza to Apa karo... mane lajjita na karo, deva!' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'kharekhara, tame parama suMdarI cho. eka vAra tamane pratyakSa jovAnI icchA hatI. badhI ja rIti-nIti toDIne ahIM cAlI Avyo chuM.' 'kRtajJa chuM deva! Apa ahIM AvyA kevI rIte?' 'AkAzamArge!' 'kyAMthI?" 'vaitADhyaparvata uparanA rathanUpura nagarathI!' 'to zuM Apa vidyAdharakumAra cho?' mArI AMkho vikasvara thaI gaI. 'ho... tamAruM anupama rUpa...' 'paNa kumAra, rUpa to raja che... eka divasa rUpa raja thaI javAnuM! evA rUpane laIne zuM karazo, kumAra?' 'tame je cho, jevAM cho... mane gamo cho. meM suMdarIo to ghaNI joI.. manapasaMda suMdarInI zodhamAM keTalAya deza-dezAntara bhaTakyo chuM! parvato pAra karyA, nadIo tarI ane samudro pAra karyA... paraMtu mArI kalpanAsuMdarI kyAMya na maLI... paNa tamArI rUpazrI ananya che... tame ja cho mArI kalpanAsuMdarI'' 'Apa je juo te sAcuM! Avo deha dhAraNa karI huM kRtArtha thaI... paraMtu he kumAra! huM evo va2, evo pati cAhuM chuM ke je jarA ane maraNano zikAra na bane... zuM te cho tame?' 'e huM zuM jANuM?' 'sAMbhaLo deva! vacana Apo ke tame vRddha nahIM thAo... tame marazo nahIM...' 'suMdarI! jarA ane mRtyuthI mukta rahevAno dAvo to kevI rIte karI zakuM? huM to eka sAdhAraNa yuvaka chuM.' 'to sAdhAraNa yuvakathI mayaNAnuM kAma nahIM thAya deva!' 56 'suMdarI! jarA ane mRtyuthI mukta koI yuvakane meM Aja sudhI jANyo nathI... ane mAruM jJAna keTaluM thoDuM? devI, tame zAnI cho... tame jANo cho ke e For Private And Personal Use Only gaNA

Page #66
jarA-mRtyuthI mukta koNa che? che kAI? nathI ne? to pachI cAlo mArI sAthe. mane tamAro banAvI lo. tamArI pratyeka cAhanA mujaba huM cAlIza.. vizapa to zuM kahyuM?' mAre to kaMI nathI kahevuM. tame cAho te karo mArI sAthe, prANanAtha!' mArA deva ane dazya adRzya thaI gayuM. paraMtu sphaTikanI pharasa para aMkita caraNacihunAM para mAthuM DhALIne huM praNipAta karatI rahI... zayanakhaMDamAM divya sugaMdha phelAI gaI... ne eka divya dhvani dUra dUra jatA saMbhaLAyA karyo... meM mAro zaNagAra utAryo nahIM. svapnalokamAMthI pAchI vaLI... ne palaMgamAM paDI.. sukhada nidrAmAM sarI paDI. savAre huM UThI. UThatAM ja meM mAruM zarIra joyuM. phaTAphaTa badhA zaNagAra dUra karyA. vastraparivartana karyuM. snAna karyuM. prabhupUjananAM vastro dhAraNa karyA ane sakhI lalitA sAthe RSabhaprAsAda tarapha cAlI. mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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10 58. ujjayinInA rAjamArga parathI potAnI sakhI lalitA sAthe rAjasutA rUpAMganA... eka ciraMtana yauvanA mayaNAsuMdarI pasAra thaI rahI hatI. te RSabhaprAsAda tarapha jaI rahI hatI. tenA vALano badho jaththo teNe jamaNI bAjunA kAna AgaLathI chAtI para lIdho hatAM. tenA vALa nitaMba sudhI AvatA hatA. teno eka hAtha chAtI para hato, tenI oDhaNI UDI na jAya te mATe chAtI para hAtha rAkhyo hato, tenA kapALamAM sarasa majAno cAMdalo karyo hato. vALa be seMthe oLelA hatA. kAkhamAM sonAnAM jhUlaNiyAM laTakatAM hatAM, baMne hAthanA kAMDA para lAla-lIlI baMgaDIo ane sonAnAM kaDAM hatAM. tenA baMne bAjuo para kotaraNI karelI pahoMcIo paherelI hatI. teNe kiramajI raMganI coLI ane kasabathI bharelo pILo caNiyo paheryAM hatAM. lalitAnA hAthamAM svarNathALa hato. thALamAM pUjanasAmagrI hatI. RSabhaprAsAdanA vizALa sabhAmaMDapamAM apUrva nIravatA vyApta hatI. padAnImAMthI agrupanI sugaMdhita dhUmra-lahero e maunane vadhu gADha banAvI rahI hatI. mayaNAne lAgyuM ke kaMIka alaukika banavuM joie, tenuM AtmasaMvedana hatuM. teNe RSabhadevanI bhavya, ramya ane hasI rahelI mUrti joi. enI AMkhomAM anurAga UbharAyo. prabhumilananI vyAkuLatAno prAraMbha thayo. koI adRzya phUlonI vicitra attanubhRta gaMdhamAM jANe cetanA mUrchita thai rahI hoya tema lAgavA mAMDyuM. ratnadIpakono sthira lAgato prakAza jANe caMcaLa banI gayAM ane e prakAzamAM indradhanuSanA raMgo pratibiMbita thavA lAgyA. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir ane acAnaka dUrathI AvatI koI jhaMkRti saMbhaLAvA lAgI. avakAzamAM ati sUkSma saMgItanI komaLa... mRdu rAgiNI karNagocara thavA lAgI. vRMdavAghanI samaveta surAvaliomAM asaMkhya nakSatronAM vividharaMgI kiraNo, eka alaukika saMgIta banI nyAtmaka banavA lAgyAM. uttarottara vAtAvaraNa prakAza, saurabha, saMgIta ane jhaMkAranAM avicala kaMpanothI vyApta banavA For Private And Personal Use Only caNA

Page #68
mAMDyuM. komalAti komala adRzya taraMgomAM mayaNAnI cetanA potAnA vazamAM rahI nahIM. saMgItanI mUcha para kSaNabhara unmanI taMdrAmAM sarakI gaI. mayaNAnI AMkho kapabhezvaranI AMkhA sAthe AMkho maLI ane e lAvaNyasuMdarI raMgamaMDapamAM nRtya karavA lAgI gaI. pratikSaNa nUtana rU5, nUtana bhaMga ane nUtana mudrAomAM enuM saudarya taraMgita thavA lAgyuM. enI kaMcukIonA kiozAvaraNomAM sAta samudronI gaharAIo UbharAvA lAgI. enA aMcalomAM AkAzanA anaMta paTala laherAvA lAgyA. enA aMgabhaMgomAMthI kSaNaanuNa navA navA alaMkAra pragaTa thavA lAgyA, enA kaTAkSa cetanAnI gaharAImAM pravezI jAya che. apUrva ane anaMta che enuM lAsya! enI nUpurajhaMkAromAM jANe pAMceya meru DolAyamAna thAya che! tyAM acAnaka prAsAdanA dvAra para eka siMhAsana para birAjita devInI mUrti... nizcala mUrti sahasA jAgrata thaI! pragaTa thaI. 'A kevo Akasmika bhavya AvirbhAva che! AvuM ja kaMIka nahIM kalpeluM, nahIM vicAreluM. kaMIka vicitra ghaTita thavAnuM hatuM ke have thaze? A ja te sauMdarya che, jenI cirakALathI mane pratIkSA hatI. paLa-paLa nita navIna A suMdarI koNa che? aho... A to mAtezvarI! prabhu RSabhadevanI parama upAsikA! lAge che ke samagra lokanuM sArabhUta lAvAya, A suMdarImAM samAI gayuM che. jANe ke A zarIra rakta, mAMsa, majjA ane asthinuM nathI lAgatuM!" ATalI pratyakSa dekhAya che chatAM te pakkaDanI bahAra che! ATalI sauMdaryamUrti hovA chatAM jANe amUrta che! pratyakSa hovA chatAM jANe parokSa che! bahAra hovA chatAM te bhItaramAM che! tenI pahoMcanI bahAra hovA chatAM e mArA hRdaya sudhI cAlI AvI che! mArI agAdha gaharAIomAM DUbakI mArIne mArI pAse AvI che... e samaye jyaNAne lAgyuM ke, bhagavAna RSabhadevanA adRzya be bAhu avakAzamAM laMbAyA... ane potAne temanA bAhupAzamAM levA najIka AvyA... ane akasmAtuM, eka palakamAM ja mayaNA jamIna para paDI gaI. vAjiMtro baMdha thaI gayAM. saMgIta, nRtya-tAla, nUpurajhaMkAra vAghadhvAna... badhuM dUra dUra jatuM vilIna thaI gayuM! mANA pa9 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #69
RSabhezvaranI daSTi ekaTa apalaka mayaNA para maMDANI... adhiSThAyikA devI cakezvarInA komaLa hAtha mayaNAnA mastaka para pharatA rahyA. prabho! parama kRpA ApanI!' mAtA! parama dayA ApanI!' huM ApanI.. Apa mArAM! mArA sarvasva! prabho! Apa ja mArA pati, mArA deva, mArA svAmI! ajara-amara ane anaMta! mayaNA ane lalitAe prabhune abhiSeka karyo. sugaMdhita puSpo caDhAvyAM. stuti karI, stavanA karI. - stavanA kyAre lezo pAsa bhagavaMta! kyAre lezo pAsa? vItyA janama anaMta, toya na choDI Aza............ bhagavaMta bahu bhUlyA-bhaTakyA ne khovAyA, - ajJAnanA bhavavanamAM, pApa ane puNyanAM karmo vaLagyAM A jIvanamAM. pAse laI peTAvo dilamAM, jJAna taNo ajavAsa......... bhagavaMta pApa thakI je Ave kaSTo do sahavAnI zakti badhA mela dhoI zakuM huM evI prero bhakti. sarvatra jagatamAM raho Apa sahavAsa... ..... bhagavaMta) icchAo ne mamatAonA ghaNA bojAo bhIMse mAtra ApanI kRpAdRSTimAM kaMIka ugAro dIse. tUTI paDIe to paNa Teko dejo khAsa... .... bhagavaMta) jIvana amAruM banyuM akAruM maraNa banaze kevuM? 60 mayaNAM For Private And Personal Use Only

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zAMti ne samatA zuM raheze? ke kUtarAnA jevuM? sapanAmAM Aje tame maLyAno bhAsa... ......... bhagavaMta badhuM chatAMya kazuM nathI! - zAzvatuM ne avinAzI. manaDuM temAM nathI tarapAtuM kyAM jAuM huM nAsI? zuM karavuM? zuM nA karavuM? mane nA koI kyAsa........ bhagavaMta eka vAra, basa eka vAra mAthe hAtha pasAro! smita karIne manane paMjo dhakhe che. prANa amAro... karo svIkAra to thavuM che caraNazaraNamAM dAsa..............bhagavaMta) huM bhAva- vihvaLa banI gaI. mArAM netro nimIlita thayAM. meM divya anubhava karyo... niraMjana-nirAkAra bhagavAna RSabhadeva potAnA siddhAsana parathI UbhA thayA... temano jamaNo hAtha UMco thayo ane AzIrvAda-mudrAmAM mArA mastaka para pharavA lAgyo! be-cAra kSaNo hatI e.. apUrva AphlAda anubhavyo, zabdomAM e anubhava bAMdhI na zakAya. huM ane lalitA RSabhaprAsAdanI bahAra AvyAM. AkAzamAM vAdaLo gherAyAM hatAM. meM lalitAne mahelamAM mokalI dIdhI. mAre ekAMta joItuM hatuM. suvrata-udyAna para Aso mahinAnAM vAdaLa gherAI AvyAM hatAM. samagra vanAMcala vAdaLonI chAyAmAM stabdha hato. nIravatA apUrva hatI. e nIravatAno... e zUnyano sparza.. mArA aNu-aNune jagAvI rahyo hato... AvI rIte... huM kyAreya ekalI nahotI paDI. ghanaghora ekAMtamAM huM ja mArI sAme joI rahI hatI... koI AkRti nahIM... basa, eka AbhAno asIma vistAra.. eka nIlamanuM virATa darpaNa! jANe enI sAme ekalI huM UbhI hatI. na nAma, na saMjJA, na kula, na deha... na koI... nA huM! udyAnanA pallava paricchedamAM jANe kevo laya jAmyo hato! varSa cAlu thaI gaI hatI. mATI pANIthI bhIMjAI gaI hatI. mATInI e sugaMdha jANe mAruM nAma pUchI rahI che... jANe mArA astitvanI e yAda apAve che... mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #71
32 mane bahAra jovA prerita kare che... acAnaka 'mayaNA!' koIno avAja saMbhaLAyo. hA, yAda AvyuM... 'huM ja mayaNA chuM!' mATInI e bhInI bhInI sugaMdhe mArA rUpane Aje pharIthI so gaNuM khIlavIne mArI sAme pragaTa karI dIdhuM. huM Atmavimohita thaI gaI... keTalI badhI yAdo ane keTalAM badhAM saMvedanothI huM bharAI gaI! tyAM mArI mAtA rANI rUpasuMdarIe mArA khabhe hAtha mUkyo. 'mayaNA!' te bolI. 'mA?' 'zuM kare che, beTI?' 'AtmA kaMI karato nathI... akartA che...' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'karmothI baMdhAyelo AtmA karyA che...' mArI mA paNa tattvajJAnI hatI. 'eTale AtmA kartA ya che ne akartA ya che... kharuM ne?' 'hA, paNa zuM atyAre ahIM A badhI vAto karavAnI che?' 'to kyAM?' 'rathamAM besI jA. ApaNe mahelamAM javAnuM che.' huM mArI mA sAthe cUpacApa rathamAM besI gaI. For Private And Personal Use Only mamaNA

Page #72
najIka 11 niyata tithie, niyata prAbhAtika samaye ujjayinInI rAjasabhA, samagra mAlavadezanA pratinidhi puruSothI khIcokhIca bharAyelI hatI. emAM rAjasiMhAsana para mAlavapati mahArAjA prajApAla birAjamAna hatA. sAmagna rAjAo beThA hatA. zreSThIgaNa upasthita hato. prakAMDa paMDito hAjara hatA. baMne rAjakumArikAone kaLAonuM jJAna ApanArA ucca koTinA prAdhyApako hatA. kumArIonI be mAtAo rAjarANI saubhAgyasuMdarI ane rUpasuMdarI paNa suMdara rezamI pAradarzaka paDadAnI pAchaLa beThI hatI. taduparAMta eka hajArathI vadhAre nAgarika strI-puruSothI rAjasabhA ThasoThasa bharAyelI hatI. rAjasabhAnA madhyabhAgamAM eka UMcI vedikA banAvavAmAM AvI hatI. tenA para be suMdara mayUrAsana goThavavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. e be Asano para rAjakumArI surasuMdarI ane rAjaduhitA mayaNAsuMdarI beThI hatI. baMne rAjakumArIoe suMdara vastro ane mUlyavAna alaMkAro paherelAM hatAM. zaivamatanA prakAMDa paMDita zivabhUti pAse surasuMdarIe zaivadharmanuM adhyayana kareluM hatuM. jyAre jainadarzananA diggaja vidvAna subuddhi pAse mayaNAsuMdarIe jaina dharmanA siddhAMtonuM talasparzI adhyayana kareluM hatuM. Aje mahArAjA prajApAla svayaM putrIonI parIkSA levAnA hatA. baMne rAjakumArikAonA jJAnavaibhavano ne buddhivaibhavano rAjasabhAne paricaya karAvavAnA hatA. *mahArAjA baMne putrIone zAstronA agocara artha pUche che! mahArAjA prajApAla svayaM AtmatattvanA jJAtA hatA. paramAtmatattvamAM emanI zraddhA hatI. zaiva ane jaina - baMne matane jANanArA hatA. mahArAjAe rAjasabhAno prAraMbha karavA paMDita subuddhine vinaMtI karI. * artha agocara zAstranA pUche bhUpati jeha, buddhibaLe behu bAlikA, Ape uttara teha. - zrIpAla rAsa madhaNA 63 For Private And Personal Use Only

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subuddhie UbhA thaI, be AMkho baMdha karI. nata mastake aMjali joDI ane bhagavastuti gAvA mAMDI : kevalyanI vizuddha sauMdarya-prabhAthI jemano deha ujvala che, karoDo sUrya jemanAmAM ekasAthe udyotamAna che, svarganAM sukho, narakanAM duHkho ane maryalokanA badhA bhoga, parAkrama, saMgharSa... vyathAo badhuM ja jemane pratyakSa che, niraMtara saMvedita che, triloka ane trikALanA anaMtadravyo, anaMta paryAyo jemanI vizuddha AtmaprabhAmAM anukSaNa taraMgita che... tevA pUrNapuruSa pUrNAnaMdI pUrNasuMdara ahaMtu RSabhadevanAM parama pAvana caraNomAM amArA namaskAra ho!" A pramANe maMgalagAna karyA pachI temaNe jAhera karyuM : "rAjA-mahArAjA, zreSThIo, prajAjano, rAjarANIo, .. sAmaMto ane sainiko, sAMbhaLo! Aje be rAjasutAo-surasuMdarI ane mayaNAsuMdarI, emaNe prApta karelAM jJAna-vijJAnanI parIkSA Apaze! parIkSA to na kahuM, teo mahArAjAnA praznonA uttara ApI jJAna-vijJAnathI ApaNuM manoraMjana karaze. sAthe sAthe dharmatattvo samajAvaze." sarvaprathama mahArAjAe surasuMdarIne pUchyuM : "vatsa, vizvamAM parama tattva kayuM che? he tAta! zivo bhUtvA zivaM neta'' - svayaM zivarUpa thaI zivanuM bhajanapUjana karavuM ane roma-romamAM 'zivoShaM zivoDae zivoS4'no nAda guMjato karavo e parama tattva che. anAdikALathI svayaMbhU zivaliMga ja svayaM brahmAMDa che. vizvatattva A rUpa dhAraNa kareluM che. bIjuM tattva che jagadaMbA pArvatI! emAM ja mArI pavitra cetanA, anaMta anukaMpArUpe, karuNArUpe, premarUpe pragaTa thaI che. e pArvatI carAcara prANImAtranI abhayadAtrI-zaraNadAyinI che. A ja to Adyazakti Atmatattva che ane enI pAse je mahAliMgAdhiSThita vizvanAtha che te ja vizvatattva che. dhUrjaTinI jaTAmAMthI bhagavatI ahiMsAnI-karuNAnI gaMgA niraMtara vahetI rahe che, svayaMbhU vizvanAtha kahe che : 'tame daMtanA vikalpono tyAga karI, ane mane jANo. huM ja tuM chuM! "zivoSE viDae zivoSt!' are, zivasvarUpa thaI zivanuM pUjana karo, bhajana karo, bhojana karo. tamArI badhI ja 64 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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mahAvyAdhiono huM ja eka mAtra zAmaka chuM. tame garUpa, tapa, cidarUpa thaI jAo! zivoDaE zivoShaM zivoShaM." vANImAM vinaya, zabdomAM gAMbhIrya ane kathanIya zAstrIya! rAjA ane prajAnAM mana prasanna thayAM. mahArAjAe surasuMdarIne bIjo prazna pUchayo : he bhadra! puNyathI manuSyane zuM prApta thAya che? he tAta! puNyathI manuSyane buddhino vaibhava maLe che. tene suMdara sazakta zarIra maLe che. manorama rUpasaMpadA maLe che. madamasta yauvana prApta thAya che. managamato priyatama maLe che ane apAra dhana-saMpatti maLe che. he tAtapAda! amAro janma rAja kuLamAM thayo te puNyathI! ApanA jevA vAtsalyapUrNa pitA maLyA te puNyathI! ati snehasnigdha mAtA maLI te puNyathI... ane prema tathA maitrI ApanArA svajana-parijano maLyA te paNa puNyathI! badhAM ja sukha.. pitAjI! puNyathI prApta thAya che." mahArAjA bolI UThyA : "sarasa uttara Apyo surAe! vinayavivekabharyo uttara Apyo surAe! zAstraSTithI sAco uttara Apyo surAe! huM surAne lAkha lAkha abhinaMdana ApuM chuM." mahArAjAnA A nivedana sAthe ja rAjasabhAe surasuMdarIno jayajayakAra karI dIrdhA. mahArANI saubhAgyasuMdarI paNa khUba porasAI. mahApaMDita zivabhUti saMtuSTa thayA. mahArAjA prajApAla surasuMdarInA pratyuttarathI rAjInA reDa thaIne bolyA: surA, beTI! huM tArA para prasanna thayo chuM. teM mArI kIrtimAM abhivRddhi karI che. mAMga, tuM je mAge te ApuM! A duniyAmAM huM jenA para prasanna thAu tene huM je mAge te ApuM! tene dhananA DhagalA Ape! tene suMdara strI ApuM! tene moTA mahela ApuM! mAna-sanmAna ApuM... ene nyAla karI dauM! ane sAMbhaLI le beTI! huM jenA para ropAyamAna thAuM, tene khedAnamedAna karI nAMkhyuM. enuM nAmonizAna na rahevA dauM... mArI eTalI agAdha zakti che." rAjA prajApAlanAM madachalakAtAM vacano rAjasabhAmAM paDaghAyAM. surasuMdarI UbhI thaI, be hAtha UMcA karI moTA svare bolI UThI : Ape kahyuM te sAcuM che, pitAjI! Ape kahyuM te parama satya che. emAM koI zaMkA ja nathI. A jagatane jivADanArAM be ja tattvo che. eka rAjA ane mayaNa 3pa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #75
bIjI varSA! he prajApAlaka samrATa! Apa ja prajAne sukhI karanArA cho..." tyAM rAjasabhAmAMthI hajAro ghoSa paDaghAyA : "sAcI vAta... sAcI vAta! rAjaduhitAnI vAta sAva sAcI... mahArAjA prajApAla ja amArA pAlaka che. rAjaduhitA surasuMdarI kharekhara catura che, samajadAra che, tattvajJa che.' surasuMdarI vedikA parathI nIce UtarI mahArAjA pAse jaIne UbhI rahI. mahArAjAe UbhA thaI khUba vAtsalyathI enA mastakane saMdhyuM ane AzIrvAda ApyA. kahyuM : kahe beTI! tane je game te mAga! Aje tArI manokAmanA pUrNa karIza. jarAya saMkoca rAkhyA vinA tuM mAga!' mahArAjAnA siMhAsanathI trIjA ja siMhAsana para beThelA rAja kumAra aridamana tarapha sahasA surasuMdarInI dRSTi paDI. e dRSTimAM rAga hato, moha hato, sneha hato. mahArAjAne rANI saubhAgyasuMdarIe aridamana ane surasuMdarInA zaiva AzramamAM thayelA saMvanananI vAta karelI ja hatI. rANIne svAmI adhorAnaMdajIe vAta karI hatI. adhorAnaMdajInI vAta saubhAgyasuMdarI mAnatI hatI eTale surasuMdarIe aghorAnaMdajI dvArA rANIne vAta pahoMcADI hatI. joke zaMkhapurIno rAjakumAra aridamana rUpavAna hato, balavAna hato ane kAmaNagAro hato. eTale e ja vakhate mahArAjAe aridamanane AdarapUrvaka potAnI pAse bolAvI pUchI lIdhuM. A mArI putrI surasuMdarI tamane varavA icche che. tame paNa mArI putrIne varavA cAho cho ne?" rAja kumAre saMmati ApI ke tarata ja mahArAjAe rAjakumAranA lalATe kaMkunuM tilaka karI ghoSaNA karI : 'huM mArI putrI surasuMdarInA vivAha kurujaM gala dezanA rAjakumAra aridamana sAthe karuM chuM." rAjasabhAmAM harSanAda thayA. beTI mayaNA, meM jANyuM che ke teM paMDita zreSTha subuddhi pAsethI jainadarzananuM gahana adhyayana karyuM che. tuM jevI anupama suMdara che evI ja tuM anupama viduSI che. jANe ke svarganI maMjUSAmAM kastUrInI maheka!' nahIM tAta, huM evI viduSI nathI banI ke Ahata dharmanuM evuM gahana mayA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #76
adhyayana paNa nathI karyuM, chatAM gurudeva subuddhi pAsethI kiMcit AI. darzanano prasAda jarUra prApta karyo che. pitAjI, sarvajJa tIrthakaroe A vizvane... vizvanA padArthone syAdavAda dRSTithI, anekAnta dRSTithI jovAno apUrva siddhAnta Apyo che.' beTI, AtmAne anekAnta dRSTithI kevI rIte javAya?" he tAta, AtmA eka apekSAe nitya che, bIjI apekSAe anitya che! ekAMte nitya nathI. ekAMte anitya nathI!" e kevI rIte?' "he deva! dravyadRSTithI AtmA nitya che, paryAyadaSTithI AtmA anitya che, Atmatattva ajara-amara-akSaya che. paraMtu enI avasthAo badalAyA kare che. eka dRSTAMtathI samajAva." jema sonAno hAra toDIne, sonuM gALIne pachI e ja sonAnuM kaMgana banAvavAmAM Ave, to sonuM enuM e ja rahyuM. sonuM nAza na pAmyuM paNa hAra nAza pAmyo, kaMganano janma thayo! tevI rIte manuSya marIne pazu thAya, to AtmA marato nathI. AtmAnI je manuSya-avasthA hatI te nAza pAmI ane pazu-avasthAno janma thayo. A avasthA eTale paryAya! AtmA dravya kahevAya, manuSyapaNuM, pazu-pakSIpaNuM, devapaNuM, nArakapaNuM - A badhA paryAya kahevAya. Ama, dravyadRSTithI AtmA nitya-avinAzI kahevAya, paryAyadRSTithI anitya-vinAzI kahevAya. AnuM nAma anekAMtadRSTi!" AvI ja rIte eka dravyamAM, eka padArthamAM, eka vyaktimAM judI judI apekSAe judAM judAM vyaktitva joI zakAya. e kevI rIte beTI?' mahArAjAne mayaNAnA tattvajJAnamAM abhiruci jAgI. "pitAjI, mArI daSTie Apa pitA cho! mArI mAtAnI dRSTie Apa pati cho! ApanI bahenanI dRSTie Apa bhAI cho! prajAnI daSTie Apa rAjA cho! mitronI dRSTie Apa mitra cho! zatruonI dRSTie Apa zatru cho! maNA ka7 For Private And Personal Use Only

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A rIte bhinna bhinna apekSAe ApanAmAM pitRtva che, patipaNuM che, bhrAtRtva che.. rAjatva che, maitrI che, zatrutA che... ane AvAM bIjAM aneka vyaktitva che! A che apekSAvAda! A che anekAntavAda! eTale ekAMta mAnyatAvALAM darzana samyagu nathI, mithyA che. sarvajJa tIrthakaroe jema AtmAnA vAstavika svarUpane batAvyuM che, tevI rIte e AtmA anAdikALathI je karmothI baMdhAyelo che, e AtmA ane karmono anAdi-saMbaMdha paNa batAvyo che. AtmA anAdikAlIna che. AtmA ane karmono saMbaMdha anAdikAlIna che. A sRSTi anAdi-anaMta che! A sRSTi pedA thayelI nathI ke eno pralaya paNa thavAno nathI! "pitAjI! A badhI tattvanI vAto meM jANI che. ane tethI mArA mananuM mane samAdhAna thayuM che. gurudeva AcAryazrI municandrasUrino paNa mArA para parama upakAra che. emaNe mane jIva, ajIva, puNya, pApa, Azrava-saMvara, baMdha-nirjarA ane mokSa - A nava tattvono bodha Apyo che. teoe mane samagra vizvaracanA - cauda rAjalokanuM svarUpa samajAvyuM che" mayaNAsuMdarI aTakI. mahArAjA prajApAle harSathI gadgagad thaIne kahyuM: "he putrI, tArI zAstrasiddhAMtanI vAto sAMbhaLIne khUba AnaMda thayo. beTI, mane eka vAta kahe ke A badhA zAstra-siddhAMtomAM samagra jIvasRSTi para kayuM tattva rAja karI rahyuM che?' karmo! ATha karmo! pitAjI, anaMta anaMta jIvo, anaMta anaMta karmo ke je ATha karmonA bheda-prabheda che, tenAthI baMdhAyelA che, lepAyelA che, jakaDAyelA che, AvarAyelA che ane e kamAM ja jIvone sukha-duHkha Ape che!" eTale mArA karmo tane sukha ApI zake? tArA karmo mane duHkha ApI zake kharAM?' nA tAta! dareka jIvana potAnAM ja bAMdhelAM karmothI svayaM sukha ke duHkha pAme. puNyakarmo udayamAM Ave to sukha pAme ane pApakarmo udayamAM Ave to duHkha pAme. pitAjI! A duniyAmAM koI koIne sukhI na karI zake ke koI koIne duHkhI nA karI zake. eTale koI manuSya evuM abhimAna na 68 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #78
rAkhavuM joIe ke 'huM bIjAne sukhI karuM chuM ke huM bIjAne duHkhI karI dauM!' rAjasabhA stabdha hatI. mayaNAno madhura svara dRDha thato jato hato. te potAnA pitA-mahArAjAne karmasiddhAMta samajAvavA icchatI hatI. teNe svaramAM namratA lAvIne kahyuM : 'hai tAta! janma-jIvana ane mRtyu - traNeya para karmonuM Adhipatya raheluM hoya che. karmonI apratima prabaLatAnI AgaLa devendro, cakravartIo, baladevo ane vAsudevo paNa jhUkI paDe che... namI javuM paDe che! are, tIrthaMkarone paNa potAnAM pUrvakRta karmonA udayathI AvatAM sukha-duHkha bhogavavAM ja paDe che!' 'he tAta, bAramA devalokanA indra sItendra. narakamAM gayelA lakSmaNajIne bacAvIne narakamAMthI laI AvavA gayelA... paNa teo na bacAvI zakyA. narakanI vedanAthI lakSmaNajIne sItendra mukta na karI zakyA.' 'mATe ke tAta, mArI zraddhA to A sarvajJabhASita karmasiddhAMta para che.' 'paraMtu beTI, mAre tArA mATe yogya vara zodhavo paDe ne? mAre tane sukhI karavAnI bhAvanA to hoya ne?' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'bhAvanA to sahu jIvone sukhI karavAnI bhAvavAnI che, paraMtu 'huM ja tane sukhI karI zakuM', evI dhAraNA khoTI che.' 'to zuM huM dhAruM ene sukhI ane dhAruM ene du:khI na karI zakuM ema tuM kahevA cAhe che?' amaNA 'hA tAta, huM e mithyA abhimAna tyajavAnuM kahuM chuM... joke AvI rAjasabhAmAM AvI tAttvika vAta karavI mane ucita lAgatI nathI...' AvI sabhAmAM eTale kevI sabhA che A?' 'jI-hajuriyAonI sabhA che A! Apa je kaho... temAM hA pADavAnI... saMmati ApavAnI... basa eka khuzAmata karavAnI. AvI che A rAjasabhA.' khera, jevI hoya tevI kharI sabhA, tuM tArA mATe kone pasaMda kare che? athavA tuM kahe to huM tArA mATe yogya varanI pasaMdagI karuM? paraMtu have tArAM lagna thavAM joIe.' mayaNAnI dRSTi jamIna para sthira thaI. teNe manomana kaMIka nirNaya karyo, mahArAjA sAme joyuM. te bolI : 'tAta! pasaMdagI karavAvALI huM koNa? pasaMdagI to mArAM karmo karaze! mane mArAM karmo para vizvAsa che...' For Private And Personal Use Only 39

Page #79
'eTale eka pitAe potAnI putrInA vivAhano nirNaya nahIM karavAno? ane tuM karma... karama karyA kare che, to zuM ame tArAM mAtA-pitA kaMI ja nathI? ame tane janma Apyo... tane pALI, poSI, bhaNAvI... prema Apyo, rAjamahelanA vaibhavAM ApyA... A badhuM tAre mana khoTuM che?' mahArAjAnI AMkho krodhathI lAla banI. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mArA jIvanamAM A pahelo prasaMga hato ke jyAre mArA pitAne meM ATalA gusse banelA joyA hatA. A rIte rAjasabhAmAM visphoTa thaze, evI mArI kalpanA na hatI. paNa surasuMdarInA prasaMge jyAre mArA pitAnuM mithyAbhimAna UbharAyeluM meM joyuM tyAre mAruM mAthuM dhUNI UThayuM hatuM. meM kahyuM : 'pitAjI, Apane saheja paNa du:kha thAya tevuM huM karavA mAgatI nathI... to paNa...' 'to paNa zuM?' 'mArI sAcI vAtathI Apane du:kha thAya to huM bIjuM zuM karI zakuM?' 'eTale mAtA-pitA potAnAM bALako para koi upakAra karatA ja nathI? bALakone sukhI karatA ja nathI? to pachI ame ATalAM varSa tamArA mATe zuM ?' 'mAtA-pitAno saMtAno para parama upakAra hoya che. Apane huM mArAM upakArI mAnuM chuM. ApanAM caraNomAM pratidina praNipAta karuM chuM... ApanI samakSa huM eka sAmAnya putrI chuM... A vAta jeTalI sAcI che, eTalI ja vAta karmonI sAcI che! he tAta, mArAM puNya karmoe ApanA mahelamAM mane janma Apyo! tame ane mArI mAtA to nimitta mAtra banyAM cho! tame mane badhAM sukhanAM sAdhano ApyAM, paNa mArA puNyanA udayathI prerita thaIne ApyAM.... 70 'mayaNA, A tAro siddhAMtano ahaMkAra bole che. nimitta paNa maLavuM to joie ne? nimittanuM zuM koI mahattva ja nathI hotuM? tAre kaMI icchavuM to paDaze... to tuM pAmIza. tuM namIza to koI tane uThAvaze. tArI icchA mujabano puruSa tAre nakkI to karavo paDaze ne?' 'tAta, abhISTanI prAptimAM icchA bAdhaka bane che. nirIhabhAvathI potAnI AtmaramaNatAmAM rahevAnuM sukha kevuM che, te kevI rIte samajAvuM, For Private And Personal Use Only samaNA

Page #80
tAta? "kALa' ane 'karma' anukuLa bane che eTale ApoApa abhISTanI prApti thAya che, te tAta, sAcI vAta kahevI te ahaMkAra nathI paNa spaSTavAditA che." "nA, nA, mayaNA! tAruM A sarvanAzI abhimAna che. Aja sudhI meM mArA dezamAM tArA jevI svecchAcArI kanyA bIjI joI nathI." 'bhale tAta, Apa ema mAno...' "to zuM tuM jIvanaparyata kuMvArI rahIza? svacchaMdAcArI.. cokhkhuM kema bolatI nathI? 'tAta, huM kaMI jANatI nathI ke mArA karmo kevAM che... kevA karmo kyAre udayamAM Avaze? hA, eTaluM jANuM chuM ke yogya kALe ne samaye mane priyatamanI prApti thaze... mArI sAme AvIne UbhA raheze... mAre zodhavA javAnI jarUra nathI ke Ape paNa..." mayaNA, tuM. hada vaTAve che A tAro svecchAcAra che. zuM tane janma ApanArAM janaka-janetAno tArA para koI adhikAra nathI? mahArAjAnI ugratA vadhatI jatI hatI. sabhAmAM uttejanA vyApatI jatI hatI. sabhAjanonA zvAsa adhdhara baMdhAyA hatA, haiyAM dhakR-dha thaI rahyAM hatAM, A rAjahaTha hatI! sAme strIhaTha hatI! "he tAta, janaka-janetA Apa A mArA dehanA cho. te paNa mAtra nimittarUpe! mArA AtmAnA mAtA-pitA to judAM che! AtmAno zuddhopayoga mArA pitA che ne Atmarati mArI mAtA che! A mAtra vicAra nathI, siddhAMta che, satya che.' to huM tAro janaka nahIM? ane tArI mAtAe tane jaNI nahIM? hA, janma ApanArAM mArAM karmo hatAM! tame baMne emAM nimitta banyAM hatAM! huM tamArI kRtajJa chuM; mahArAjA! Apano upakAra mAnavo te upacAra che, vyavahAra che. jyAre vAstavikatA enAthI judI che. dareka jIva potAnA janma-jIvana ane maraNanA svAmI svayaM che, bIjA koI nahIM.' 'nirlajjatAnI hada che kharI? mArA ja vIryanuM buMda mArI sAme vidroha kare che..." he rAjezvara! Apa ApanA ananta vIryane... ApanA AtmasvarUpane oLakhatA hota to...' maNA 1 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #81
'uddhata chokarI, huM jANuM chuM. badhuM jANuM chuM. huM tane janma ApanAra janaka chuM. mArA vinA........ 'tAta! mArA jo janmanA tame mAlika cho to mArA maraNanA paNa mAlika kema nahIM? je mArA janmanA svAmI che, te mArA maraNanA paNa svAmI hovA joIe. he tAta! zuM Apa mane mRtyuthI bacAvI zakazo? athavA mArI sAthe marI zakazo?' 72 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'cUpa rahe. pitAnI sAthe vivAda karatAM tane zarama nathI AvatI? huM paNa jouM chuM ke tAro hAtha koNa pakaDe che? tArAM karmo tane kevo vara lAvI Ape che... mAtA-pitAnI AjJA ane maryAdAno bhaMga karanArI kulAMgAra kanyAnuM moM jovA huM nathI icchato...' mahArAjAno krodha AsamAne pahoMcyo. 'tAta, mArA para roSa na karo. ApanI AjJA zirodhArya che. ApanI maryAdA mArI AMkho para che. Apa mArA mATe je pati pasaMda karI lAvazo tene huM varIza!' meM pitAjInI caraNaraja mAthe caDhAvI, praNAma karyA ane huM mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI pAse cAlI gaI. For Private And Personal Use Only magaNA

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kRSNapakSa hato. AkAza haju nirabhra thayuM na hatuM. avAranavAra vAdaLAM jAmatAM, varasatAM hatAM. zaradanI cAMdanI paNa dara varSa jevI sohAmaNI banI na hatI. jANe tenI caMdra jevI zItaLatAne koIe rokI lIdhI hatI. caMdra DhaMkAyelo ne tArA dhumAyelA dekhAtA hatA. ame amArA nAnakaDA chatAM suMdara gharanI bAlkanImAM beThAM hatAM. mArI sAsu rANI kamalaprabhA, emanA suputra eTale ke mArA priyatama ane huM - ame traNeya beThAM beThAM vAto karatAM hatAM. mArI rAjasabhAnI vAta sAMbhaLI kamalaprabhA kSaNabhara tharatharI gayAM hatAM. meM mArI vAta AgaLa calAvI. ujjayinInA rAjamahelanA AkAzamAM meghADaMbara jAmI gayo hato. rAjahaTha, ahaMkAra ane badalAnI bhAvanAe mahArAjAne yamarAja jevuM kurUpa ApyuM hatuM. temaNe mAro pIcho pakaDyo hato. AkhuM nagara DahoLAyuM hatuM. gherAyelAM vAdaLa vadhu gherAM banatAM cAlyAM hatAM. varasavA pahelAM pralayaMkara meghatAMDava maMDAI gayuM hatuM. meM vicAryuM : vAdaLa bhale gherAyuM. gherAvA de. varasI jaze eTale pharIthI nirabhra banaze ane satyano sUrya sahastrakiraNothI jhagamagI UThaze." mArA manobhAva nadInAM nIra jevA svaccha ane nirabhra AkAza jevA zubhra-zuci ane nirdoSa hatA. mArA manamAM mArA pitA pratye koI dveSa nahoto jabhyo. tema chatAM huM samajI gaI hatI ke have pitAnA pyAra ne vahAlanI duniyAmAMthI meM vidAya lIdhI hatI. sukha-du:kha, zoka-bhaya vagere badhI lAgaNIone jANe meM dUra haDaselI mUkI hatI. saMdhyAno samaya hato. kSiprA nadInA taTa para AvelA rAjapavanamAM huM vihAra karavA pahoMcI gaI. mArI sAthe mArI sakhI lalitA maunapaNe cAlI rahI hatI. upavanamAM latAmaMDapo hatA. temAM aneka bhadrAsano hatAM. eka bhadrA-sana para huM besI gaI. lalitA jamIna para mArA paga pAse natamastake beThI. mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #83
mArA manamAM rAjasabhAmAM thayelA vivAdanI vAto ghUmarAtI hatI. meM vicAryuM. "mArAthI mArA pitAno avinaya to nathI thayo ne? joke mArA zabdothI emane khUba AghAta thayo che, paraMtu kyAreka satya evuM dhAradAra hoya che... bIjAne vAge che, baLe che. hA, jo meM pitAnA abhimAnane, emanA kartutvanA abhimAnane puSTa karyuM hota to teo mArA para, surasuMdarInI jema prasanna thaI, mArA managamatA koI rAja kumAra sAthe paraNAvI detA paNa kyAM haju koI rAja kumArane mArA pati tarIke pasaMda ja karyo che? ane e pasaMdagI karanArI huM koNa? athavA mArA pitA paNa mArA mATe e varanI pasaMdagI zAne kare ?' mane emanuM kartutvanuM abhimAna jarAya na gamyuM. e bolyA ke "huM dhAruM tene sukhI karI zakuM ane dhAruM ene duHkhI karI zakuM...' A kathane mane akaLAvI mUkI. mAruM mana khaLabhaLI UThyuM... eTale mAre vastusthiti... karmano siddhAMta batAvavo paDyo... paNa tyAM emano ahaMkAra emane naDyo! "huM pitA ane tuM mArI putrI... putrIe to pitAnI dareka vAta nIcA moDhe mAnI ja levAnI... koI taka nahIM karavAno... koI carcA nahIM karavAnI!" AvI vAta kema calAvI levAya? vaLI teo to rAjA che ne! eka to pitA ane vaLI rAja! eTale abhimAnanA pahADa para besI gayA. mArA pratye atyaMta nArAja thayA. keTalo badho prakopa pragaTyo hato rAjasabhAmAM! - have teo mane duHkhI karavAnA upAyo zodhaze! have teo mane putrIrUpe nahIM paNa zatrurUpe jovAnA. eTale mArI sAna ThekANe lAvavA, emanI mAnyatAne siddha karavA mane duHkha kema paDe, enA vicAro karavAnA! bhale kare, mArAM karmo mArI sAthe che. mArAM puNyakarmono udaya haze to teo mane duHkhI nahIM karI zake ane mArAM pApakarmono udaya haze to mane sukhI nahIM karI zake! huM vicAronA pravAhamAM taNAtI jatI hatI. tyAM lalitA bolI : have aMdhAruM UtarI AvyuM che. ApaNe mahelamAM jaIe." hA, cAla, mahelamAM jaIe." huM sahasA UbhI thaI gaI ane ame be sakhIo mahelamAM pahoMcI. mAre mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI pAse javuM hatuM. mane mArI mAtA khUba gamatI 74 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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hatI ane haju paNa game che. huM jyAre prabhAte nidrAno tyAga karuM, AMkho kholuM tyAre mane enI ardhavikasita kamaLa jevI AMkho... ane paravALA jevA enA adharasaMpuTa dekhAtA. enAmAM himAlayanI zItaLatA ane vasaMtanI uSmA varatAtI... ane UjaLAM dUdha jevAM suMdara vastra paherelI mArI mAM rUpasuMdarI dekhAtI. huM ene lagabhaga bheTI paDatI. paNa Aje jyAre huM enA khaMDamAM pravezI tyAre e palaMga para gumasUma beThI hatI. hatI, e ekalI ja hatI, huM enI pAse jaIne UbhI rahI. "mA!' huM bolI. beTI..." eNe mArI sAme bhInI AMkhe joyuM. meM enI AMkho joI... ne huM coMkI UThI... "mA, tuM raDI che? jarUra raDI che mA... zA mATe mA?' ane mAro svara Adra banI gayo. huM mArI mAne vaLagI paDI. kharekhara, mArI mAnI AMkhomAMthI AMsu sAravA lAgyAM hatAM. mArA uttarIya vastrathI enI AMkho lUchI, eNe mArI AMkhomAM AMkho parovI... enI AMkhomAM udAsI hatI... ajaMpo hato... Akroza hato... mayaNA..." te bolI. huM palaMga para enI pAse ja besI gaI hatI. tArA pitA AvyA hatA..' haM...' tIvra kaSAyamAM hatA..." haze ja..." na bolavAnuM bolI gayA... beTI!" kaSAyathI prerita manuSya na bolavAnuM ja bole..." paNa temanA jevA moTA mANase AvuM badhuM aNachAjatuM bolAya? bALako to bolI jAya, paNa mAtA-pitAthI aghaTita bolAya kharuM? paNa temane koNa samajAve?' mA, kaSAyaparavaza jIvane samajAvavAno prayatna vyartha jAya che. ene samajAvavA jatAM eno roSa baLavattara thAya che." te chatAM, temane khoTuM pagaluM bharatAM to rokavA paDaze...' eTale?" 'teo tane tArAM karmonA havAle karavAnA bahAne, koI duHkhI, daridra... ayA 7pa For Private And Personal Use Only

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apaMga... evA yuvaka sAthe...' mArI mA bolI na zakI... tenAthI DUsakuM mukAI gayuM. 'mArI mA! tuM AvI ciMtA kare che? tuM to jinamatanI jJAtA che. koI koIne duHkhI karI zakatuM nathI. koI koIne sukhI karI zakatuM nathI. mA, A siddhAMtanI to mArI laDAI che! ane huM A siddhAMtane vaLagI rahevAnI chuM! mArA pitAnuM kartRtvanuM abhimAna mAre toDavuM ja che. e bhale ema mAne ke 'huM mayaNAne du:khI karI daI, enA siddhAMtane khoTo siddha karI dauM...!' nA, mA! nA, emanAthI huM DaratI nathI. du:khothI DaravAnuM zA mATe? pUrvajanmomAM pApakarmo bAMdhyAM haze ane e karmo A janmamAM udayamAM Avaze to duHkha Avaze ja! e duHkhono samabhAve svIkAra karI levAno. mana para e duHkhono bhAra nahIM rAkhavAno, A vAta huM sArI rIte samajelI chuM.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'eTale beTI, tArA pitA tane koI raste rajhaLatA bhikSuka sAthe...... anAtha sAthe... apaMga sAthe paraNAvI deze to tuM paraNI jaIza?' 'hA mAtA! jarUra paraNI jaIza...! jo mArA puNyakarmano udaya haze to e bhikSukanA dehamAM ke vezamAM koI bhavya AtmA chupAyelo haze! koI uttama puruSa rahelo haze! koI rAjakumA2 Avelo haze! zA mATe ciMtA kare che mA? sarvajJa paramAtmAnA A siddhAMta para mArI avicala zraddhA che!' 'paNa bhadre, mArI AvI UgatI kaLI jevI putrIne duHkhI thatI huM nahIM joI zakuM... nahIM joI zakuM, beTI...' mArI mA AvezamAM UbhI thaI gaI. 'huM mahArAjAne spaSTa zabdomAM kahI daIza ke putrI mAtra tamArI ja nathI, mArI paNa che. mArI saMmati vinA tame enAM lagna nahIM karI zako.' 50 'mAtA, to ApaNI vAta... ApaNo paDakAra DhIlo paDI jaze. tuM paNa mA, sarvajJa-matane mAnanArI che ne? bhagavAna RSabhadevanI upAsikA che ne? gurudeva municandrasUrinI ziSyA che ne? tuM jarAya na gabharAIza, mA. ApaNA mAthA para paramAtmAnI aciMtya kRpA che ane sadgurunA AMtarika AzIrvAda che mA, pachI DaravAnuM zAnAthI?' mArI mA, tuM sAMbhaLa : For Private And Personal Use Only mANA

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mAM, zuM Ane tuM sukha kahe che? dhagadhagatI retInA raNane tuM samajuM, phUlajhADa kahe che? tuM zuM Ane sukha kahe che? dhana-yauvana-jIvananA raMgo UThatA-zamatA tarala taraMgo kSaNajIvI... svapna jevA zAzvatane enI khAtara khovA? mRgajaLane zuM tuM sukha kahe che? mA, zuM Ane tuM sukha kahe che? rogo jemAM saLavaLe che, na kSaNabhara kaLa vaLe che... ne kSaNa kSaNa je pIgaLe che... durgadhathI bharelI kAyAne tuM sukha kahe che? mAM, Ane tuM sukha kahe che? na kara pyAra, nathI e rasanI dhAra nathI e prema-abhisAra A badho che betAla sUra-asAra ene tuM malahAra kahe che? tuM zuM ene sukha kahe che? mArI mA, tuM zuM Ane sukha kahe che? mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI sthira dRSTie jotI rahI. mane lAgyuM ke ene kaMIka kahevuM che. "bola mA! zuM kahevuM che tAre?" to pachI vIrAMganA banIne beTI, jhajhUmavuM paDaze. A to sattAdhIza che.. rAjA-mahArAjA che... emanA hAtha ghaNAM lAMbA hoya che, beTI.." mA, tuM pAchI bhUlI gaI? badhAnAM hAtha karatAM mArA paramAtmAnA hAtha ghaNA ja lAMbA che ne Abha UMcA che! mArA gurudevanA hAtha vaja jevA daDha che ne kamaLa jevA komaLa che! ane mAro dharma - mAro zIladharma.. mArI rakSA karavA sadA-sarvatra tatpara che.. mATe mArI mA! mArI vahAlI mA! tuM mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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paNa mArA pakSe che ne! mArA paMDita... mahAmanISI subuddhi paNa mArA pakSe che. mahAmAtyanI paNa mArA pratye... tArA pratye keTalI badhI sahAnubhUti che!' . Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir to pachI tArA tAtane...' koI AjIjI karavAnI AvazyakatA nathI. koI prArthanA karavAnI jarUra nathI. emane je karavuM hoya te karavA de!' ame mA-putrI mauna thaI gayAM. rAtano pahelo-bIjo prahara vItI gayo hato. ame sUI javAno nirNaya karyo. dIpako jhAMkhA karI dAsI bahAra cAlI gaI. For Private And Personal Use Only mANA

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13 ujjayinI rAtrinA aMdhakAramAM stabdha hatI. vAtAvaraNamAM apUrva nIravatA hatI. paraMtu mArA aNu-aNumAM jhaMkAra hato. spaMdana hatuM. saMvedanAsaMcetanA hatI. keTalI mArmika ane vedhaka hatI e saMcetanA Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir huM mArI kathA saMbhaLAvatI jatI hatI... have kathAmAM vaLAMka Avato hato. e vaLAMke 'e' UbhA hatA! zrIpAla! nA, nA, uMbararANA! e bolI UThayA : 'have mane mArI karamakathA kahevA do...' 'nA, beTA, nA, pahelAM, tArI kathA nahIM, mArI kathA kahevI paDaze. e pachI tArI kathA zarU thaze, pahelAM mArI kathA sAMbhaLo.' mayaNA saMbhAraNAM! e vItyA divasonAM saMbhAraNAM! e pAgala jIvananA avazeSo... enA ya dhvaMsAvazeSa... vismRtinA zyAmala paTa para paNa kadI ye vilupta nahIM thanArAM e smaraNo... kevI ane keTalI mAdakatA bharI che emAM? kevI vedanA anubhavAya che emAM? keTaluM darda cUMTAyeluM che emAM? sukha-du:khanuM e ajaba saMmizraNa - ullAsa ane nizvAsa... vilAsa ane vedanA, aizvarya ane dAridracanuM bhISaNa aTTahAsya... Aha...! keTakeTalA nizvAsa ne nisAsA bharyA paDyA che emAM? mAruM gata jIvana e to evuM saMbhAraNuM che ke je sukha-duHkhathI jarjarita tathA mAnavIya AkAMkSAo ane bhAvanAothI chinnabhinna prAsAdanuM eka karuNApUrNa avazeSa che. evA aneka avazeSo parathI kALano asIma pravAha vahI rahyo che. temAM nitanavA taraMgo UThyA che... bharatI vadhatI gaI che ane mArA jIvananA e avazeSa jANe jaLamagna khaMDero thaI gayA che. jaLanI aMdara ja anAyAsa dhovAIne nAza pAmyA che... have rahI che smaraNonI thoDI zI mATI. paNa e mATImAM ya jIvana che. bhAvanAo ane vAsanAo ene uddIpta kare che. vismRtinI zItaLatA ene ThAre che ane sukha-duHkhanI bhISaNa AMdhI For Private And Personal Use Only

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e jIvana-kaNone vera-vikhera karI nAMkhe che. zAMta banI jAya che. e smRtikonI uvekhanA karI, ene veravikhera karI, eno nAza karI kALa zAMtino zvAsa le che. chatAM e kaNa e smaraNo para vahAvelA sukhaduHkhanA azruvArie punaH aMkurita thAya che ane e navaaMkurita kaNonA AdhAre sarjAya che eka svapnaloka! ane eka vAra pharIne ApaNe e vItyA divasonI mAdakatA ane vedanAnI sRSTimAM viharavA mAMDIe chIe. e azrupUrNa jIvana mAnavajIvanane jALavI rAkhe che. pASANahRdayI kALa paNa potAnA kaThora ane pralayaMkara svabhAvane bhUlI gayo ane e svapnalokamAM vicaratAM vicaratAM e pote ja eka saMbhAraNuM banI gayo che! saMbhAraNAM! svapnalokanAM saMbhAraNAM! enA sukhamaya divasonA bhagnAvazeSa che. A pArthiva jagatamAM avatarIne paNa suMdara svargIya svargalokane svapnalokane mAnavI bhUlI zakato nathI. e mRgatRSNAmAM doDavAnI icchA... e vizuddha kalpanAlokamAM viharavAnI ghelachA... e adamya icchAnI tRpti kAje mAnavI AkhuM jIvatara doDe che. doDyA ja kare che. ane enuM e manohara AkarSaka rUpa mAnavIne lalacAvatuM Akhare tyAM laI jAya che ke jyAM kalpanAnuM svarga sthAyI nathI hotuM! e acira sthAyI svarga khaMDita thaIne mAnavIne marmAhata karI eno nAza karI zake che. 80 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir chatAM e svapnalokamAM, e svargamAM eka AkarSaNa che, eka manamohaka jAdu che ke je mAnavIne nirupAya banAvIne potAnA tarapha kheMcetA jAya che. e svapnalokanI duHkhada karuNa kathA... bhagna kathAnI e vyathAbharI vAta jANe che, tenI asAratAne oLakhavA chatAM mAnavI enI tarapha ja kheMcAto cAlyo jAya che. huM paNa cAlI rahI hatI. e smaraNo, bhagnAzAonA e avazeSo... keTakeTalA unmAdaka hoya che? premanI e karuNa kathA jotAM na jANe zAne AMkhamAM AMsu bharAI Ave che! e bhagna khaMDeromAM pharatAM dilamAM eka tophAna UThe che. nisAso mUkI devAya che. haiyuM bharAI Ave che. AMsu sarI paDe che. bhagna svapnalokanA, bhAMgI paDela haiyAnA, verAna banelA svarganA e khaMDeroe paNa eka navo mAnavakalpanAloka sarjyo che. hRdaya talase che, magaja behoza bane che. smRtionuM vAvAjhoDuM UkhaDe che, bhAvono pravAha chalakAI UThe che. AMkhomAM jhaLajhaLiyAM UbharAya che ane vismRtinI e mAdaka madirAnuM pAna For Private And Personal Use Only mayagA

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karIne huM jANe kyAMya taNAI rahI hatI. nasomAM dhrujArI UThI hatI. magaja koI navI tAjagI anubhavI rahyuM hatuM. pAgalapaNuM? dIvAnapaNuM? kaMI ye samajAtuM na hatuM. A zuM thaI gayuM? kevI rIte thaI gayuM? koI ja mArga sUjhato na hato. huM koMkaNadezanI rAjakumArI kamalaprabhA, lagna karIne caMpAnagarInA rAjA siMharathanI mahArANI banIne AvI hatI. caMpAnagarInA sAmrAjyanA navayuvAna samrATa siMharathanuM e madabharyuM chalakatuM yauvana, e mastAnI adA... Aje enI smRti manane pAgala karI mUke che. rAjyanI prajA AkhI enAM caraNe ALoTatI hatI. yavana-sAkI madirAno jAma bharAI gayo hato. rAjyazrI enA caraNe nartanarata hatI. paNa durbhAgya.. e mAro hRdayanAtha e premI potAnI preyasI-nagarIthI risAI gayo... mAtra be varSano rAjakumAra ApIne teNe mane vidhavAno veSa aMgIkAra karAvyo. teNe potAnuM bhagna hRdaya mArA usaMgamAM arpIne mRtyunuM AliMgana lIdhuM! sadhavAvasthAnuM eka mAtra cihna seMthAnuM siMdura bhUMsAI gayuM... yauvananI mAdakatA ThIMgarAI gaI. mahArAjA siMharathanI huM pahelI premakathA hatI. e kathAno mAtra cAra ja varSamAM kaccaraghANa nIkaLI gayo. mArI UgatI javAnI ane mArA bhagna haiyA para thatA kAramA kaThora ghA.. emanA hRdayamAM vedanAno koI pAra na hato. amAruM e asthAyI milana, gaNyAgAMThyA divasonI e sukhada paLo ane pachI emano ciraviyoga. parasparane jhaMkhatA ne jhUratA amArA AtmAo nAhyA chatAM ya zAMta na thayA ane Aje huM mArI chAtI para paththara mUkI mArA vidrohI hRdayane dAbI rahI chuM. kAraNa, jyAre mAro putra zrIpAla be varSano thayo, rAjaparivAra ane maMtrImaMDaLanI salAha mujaba zrIpAlano rAjyAbhiSeka karI devAmAM Avyo. huM rAjamAtA banI gaI. mahAmaMtrI matisAgare rAjyanI suvyavasthAno saMpUrNa bhAra upADI lIdho hato. mArA diyara ajitasena zrIpAlanA - bALarAjAnA paDakhe - aDIkhama thaIne UbhA rahyA. prema ane karuNAnA, sneha ane saMbaMdhonA pyAlA bharAtA rahyA... bharAtA rahyA... eka varSa, be varSa... paraMtu pachI e pyAlA DhaLavA mAMDyA, phUTavA mAMDyA. ane amRtanI jagAe mAnavarudhira vahevAnI mANA 81 For Private And Personal Use Only

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gupta maMtraNAo zaru thaI. payaMtra racAyAM. ajitasena kAkAe bhatrIjAno vadha karI, svayaM rAjya prApta karavAnuM paDyuMtra racyuM. senApatione phoDyA... maMtrIone vaza karyA. diyara dagAkhora banyo. mahArAjA siMhAthe je caMpAne vasAvI hatI, sajAvI hatI. jene pArthiva svarga banAvyuM hatuM, jene potAnI bhAvanAothI, potAnA aMtaranAM vArithI sIMcyuM hatuM.. je saurabha, saMgIta ane sauMdaryano cirapravAha vaheto karyo hato, premarasanA e suMdara jhagamagatA sphaTika pyAlA... varSo sudhI e pyAlAo bharAtA ja rahyA hatA. jIvanarasa emAM ThalavAto rahyo hato. paraMtu eka divase ajitasene e sauMdaryanI lAlIne mAnavarudhiranI lAlIthI phikkI pADI devAno peMtaro racI dIdho hato. bALakumAranA jIvanarasane sUkavI nAMkhanAra mRtyarUpI haLAhaLa jhera emAM ThalavavAnI yojanA nizcita banI hatI. paraMtu mahAmaMtrI matisAgara, sva. mahArAjAnA pUrNa bharosApAtra puNyapuruSa hatA. teo temanA AvAsamAM rAtrinA samaye AMTA mArI rahyA hatA. sonA ane rUpAnI dIvIo upara dIpazikhAo jhAMkhI paDI gaI hatI. sevako nirAMte sUI gayA hatA. maMtrIrAja prAsAdanI bArI vATe gRhaudyAna vIMdhIne dUradUra aMdhakAramAM jovA mathatA hoya tema najara pheMkatA, AMTA mArI rahyA hatA. grISmano akaLAvI nAMkhanAro divasa hato. AkhA divasanI rAja kAjanI lAMbI mAthAkUTa ne vItelI sudIrgha rAtri.. chatAM Aje mahAmaMtrI koI gaMbhIra vicAraNAmAM hatA. khaMDamAM AMTA mArI rahyA hatA. temanA moTA bharAvadAra snAyubaddha paga, virAmakhaMDanI pRthvIne dAbavA mathatA hoya tema avizrAMta cAlI rahyA hatA. teo guptamArge mArA rAjamahelamAM, mArA zayanakhaMDamAM AvI pahoMcyA. kSaNabhara to huM stabdha thaI gaI. teo mArI sAme AvIne UbhA rahyA. temanI daSTi nIcI hatI. huM Asana parathI UbhI thaI gaI ane mahAmaMtrIne besavA nimaMtraNa ApyuM. paNa A zuM? emanI AMkhomAM AMsu? hA, UnAM UnAM AMsu. nizvAsanI bhaThThImAM tapelAM AMsunAM biMduo! 82 mubA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #92
"bolo, mahAmaMtrI,.. je vAta hoya te ni:saMkoca kaho..." "devI, dhIme bolo... dIvAlone kAna hoya che..." huM mauna thaI gaI. "mahArANI, Aje ja bALarAjAne laI gupta raste Apa jaMgalamAM adazya thaI jAo... atyAre ja A rAtrimAM...' nahitara?' bALarAjAnI hatyA... tamArI hatyA... mArI hatyA..." hA! paDyuMtra goThavAI gayuM che." "mahAmAtya... A badhuM zuM? be varSa pUrve vidhavA banI ane Aje mAre rastAnI rajhaLatI. " hAjI, A bALakumAranI rakSA khAtara jaMgalamAM bhAgI javuM paDaze. chupAI javuM paDaze. rUpaparivartana karavuM paDaze... jaMgalonAM kaSTo sahavAM paDaze!' mArI svapnasRSTi bhAMgI paDI. AMsuo vahevA lAgyAM. e AMsuomAM svarga mAruM vahI gayuM. svapnasRSTimAM svargane verAna banatuM joyuM. svapnamAM paNa hAya, e svarga cirasthAyI thaI na zakyuM. svapnalokamAM e ja rudana! mAnavaAkAMkSAo bhagna bane che, nirAzAo moM phADIne enI sAme ghUrake che. kaThora nirjIva jIvana e svargane hatuM na hatuM, karI mUke che. chatAMya svapno jovAnI A lata! ATalAM kaThora satyonA anubhava pachI ane AvAM karuNAjanaka drazyo jovA chatAMya pharIpharI e sukhada divasone yAda karavA svapnasRSTimAM viharavAnuM e pralobhana... eka vAra hoThe lagADI tarachoDI devuM... keTalI kaThoratA? haiyuM dAkhavI na zake tevI niSpharatA joIe. paNa mArI e svapnasRSTi mArA Azcarya ane AnaMdanI e vastu bhAMgI paDI... UDI gaI... pArthiva svargane verAna banatuM joyuM, e khaMDeronuM karuNa dana sAMbhaLyuM, enA e marmabhedI nisAsA sAMbhaLyA. enI sAthe huM paNa raDI paDI. mane lAgyuM ke huM kharekhara huM lUMTAI gaI. mane mahAmaMtrIe rAjamahelamAMthI gupta suraMganA mArge nagaranI bahAra kADhI. rAtano pahora hato. mahAmaMtrI mArga cIMdhI, namana karI cAlyA gayA. kahetA gayA : "havAmAM ogaLI jajo! zatrunA hAthamAM na AvI jazo..." mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #93
nirjana nadIkinAre huM cAlI. mArI chAtIe rAja kumArane meM cIpakAvelo hato. te kharekhara UMghI gayo hato. nirjana nadIno kinAro ane vArevAre UbhA thatA vanavagaDAnA ThaMDA hima vAvaMToLa... dUra dUra nagaranA guMbajo para laTakatA AkAza-dIpako ya AkAzadIpaka jevA dekhAtA hatA. nadIkinArA paranuM smazAna dekhAyuM. smazAnamAM ghorakhodiyAM jAnavaro lapAtAM-chupAtAM pharatAM hatAM. emanI haDapheTe caDatI mAnavInI khoparIo ne hADakAM citra-vicitra avAja karatAM hatAM. AkAzamAM koI phaNIdharanA saLavaLATa jevo vIjaLIno lasarako thayo ane mArI AgaLa kIcaDabharyuM nALuM joyuM. enI badabo-kIcaDa, kAMTA.. jhAMkharAM mane mUMjhavI na zakyAM. huM ughADe page jANe doDI rahI hatI. manamAM zatruno bhaya hato. putra rakSAnI jhaMkhanA hatI. meM mArI potAnI jAtane jIvananI koI sAMkaDI galImAM koI nirjana ane ujjaDa bhUpradeza para ekalI-aTUlI banIne UbhelI joI. e sAMkaDI ane ujjaDa bhUminI eka bAju dhasamasato, udhamAta macAvato, khaLabhaLATa karato pracaMDa pravAha vaheto hato. A pracaMDa pravAhamAM ja mAre taNAvAnuM hatuM. huM akaLavikaLa banatI hatI. mAruM dainika jIvana khaLabhaLI gayuM hatuM. mAruM vyagra mana abhAnapaNe bolI UThatuM hatuM "A saMsAra? AvI duniyA? A kaThora niSphara pArthiva jagata mAruM sarvasva lUMTI gayuM.' huM hIbakIhIbakIne raDI paDI. kaThora pArthiva jagatamAM A kaThora lokamAM jyAM mAnavabhAvonI koIne kaMI paravA nathI; mAnavaicchA AkAMkSAono upahAsa karavo e eka svAbhAvika vAta che; jyAM mAnavahRdaya para ghA karavAmAM ja manoraMjana raheluM che tyAM oha...! AthI vadhAre huM vicArI nathI zakatI. mAre mArA putrane surakSita jagAe mUkavo hato. rAjA ajitasena duzmana banyo hato. e mane ane kumArane game tyAMthI zodhI kADhIne motanA ghATe utArI devA icche che. evuM kaMI bane e pUrve mAre putrane surakSita jagAe mUkI devo joIe. e aMdhArI rAta hatI. AkhI duniyA para ghora aMdhAra chavAyo hato. chatAM jagata sUtuM na hatuM. caMpAno e tAja, caMpAnA sAmrAjyano e sitAro... mAtA kamalaprabhAnA hRdayAkAzano e ujjavala candra Aje sadAne For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #94
mATe chupAI javAno hato. zizune janma ApanArI mAtAe jIvasaTosaTanI bAtha bhIDI hatI. sneha ane jIvananI e jANe AkharI paLo hatI, e rAjamahelanA sukhamaya divasono, prema ane AhlAdathI pUrNa chalakatA e jIvanano have aMta AvanAra hato. jagata keTaluM kSaNabhaMgura che! Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir huM bhayathI vyAkuLa hatI. mArga ajANyo hato. AMdhI vadhatI jatI hatI. bhAgyAkAza durbhAgyarUpI vAdaLothI chavAI rahyuM hatuM. roIroIne AsamAne sarvatra AMsurUpI jhAkaLabiMdu veryAM hatAM. AhonA dhummasamAM mane mArga sUjhato na hato. e verAna-ujjaDa pradezamAM cAlIcAlIne... doDIdoDIne huM thAkI gaI hatI. chatAM mArA lAlane chAtIe vaLagADIne huM caMpAthI dUra dUra cAlI rahI hatI. mane khAtarI hatI ke mane ane bALarAjAne pakaDavA mATe ajitasena enA sainikone mArI pAchaLa cAreya dizAomAM doDAvaze ja. kharekhara mArA e nAlAyaka diyare mArA svargasamA saMsAramAM narakanuM viSa phelAvyuM hatuM. anaMgayauvanA viSakanyA paNa hoya che. eno sahavAsa sevIne koNa ciraMjIva banyuM che? khera, duHkhanA bhUte sukhane satAvyuM che. mastI ane unmAdane kSayano rAjayoga vaLagyo che! mArI AzAo ane kAmanAone niSThura saMsAra dvArA kacaDAtI joIne huM raDI paDI hatI, mAruM sajIva komaLa hRdaya phATIne jANe TukaDeTukaDA thaI gayuM hatuM... e TukaDAo mArA AkhA ye bhagna svapnalokamAM vikharAyelA nirjIva thaIne paDelA che. aruNodaya thayo hato. huM eka bhISaNa aTavImAM pravezI gaI hatI. tyAM mane cAreya bAjuthI duHsaha durgaMdha AvavA lAgI. meM AsapAsa joyuM, dUra dUra najara nAMkhI... paraMtu khyAla na Avyo ke AvI ghora durgaMdha kyAMthI AvI rahI che... huM aTavImAM dhIre dhIre AgaLa vadhatI cAlI... tyAM eka evo nadIkinAro Avyo ke jenA taTa para nAnA-nAnA pahADo hatA. pahADomAM nAnI-nAnI guphAo hatI. medAnomAM ghaTAdAra vRkSo hatAM... ane tyAM seMkaDonI saMkhyAmAM mANaso hatA! mANaso hatA paNa kolAhala na hato. maNA e seMkaDonI saMkhyAmAM kuSTharogI puruSo hatA. koI pahADonI guphAnA dvAre beThelA hatA, koI vRkSonI chAyAmAM beThelA hatA. koI pahADanI For Private And Personal Use Only 85

Page #95
bakholAmAM beThelA hatA, sUtelA hatA. emanAM aMgo-pratyAMgo gaLI gayelAM hatAM. temanA hAthanI AMgaLIo kharI paDI hatI ane temAMthI durgadhamaya rasI jharatI hatI. temanAM nAka-kAna saDI gayelAM hatAM. emane jovA AMkho rAjI thatI na hatI. hAtha-paganI cAmaDI sapheda paDI gaI hatI ane emAM chAlAM paDI gayAM hatAM. temAMthI durgadha mAratuM drava vahetuM hatuM. kuSTharogIonuM vaseluM eka gAma ja hatuM e. kamalaprabhA rAjaputrane khabhethI utArI, eka pASANa para beThI. ajANI sannArI.. te paNa suMdara vastrAlaMkArathI suzobhita strIne, putra sAthe ekalavAyI AvelI joI kuSTharogIono saradAra prabhAtasiMha kamalaprabhA pAse Avyo. teNe namratAthI kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : "he devI! Apa bhUlAM paDIne ahIM AvI caDyAM cho? A pradezamAM ame sAtaso kuSTharogIo rahIe chIe. ame paNa nagaramAM ja janmyA hatA, paraMtu A cepI kuSTharoganA lIdhe amane zahera-nagaro-gAmothI dUra rahevAno janAdeza che. rAjAno paNa Adeza che. ame keTalAka samayathI ahIM rahIe chIe. "he bhrAtA! huM caMpAnagarInI rAjarANI kamalaprabhA chuM. caMpAmAM rAjavidroha thayo che. bALarAjAno vadha karI, eno kAko ajitasena rAjA banavA icche che ke Aje banI paNa jaze. e bALarAjAnI hatyA na karI nAMkhe, te mATe, huM rAtorAta rAja kumArane laIne bhAgI chuM... ne atyAre tamArA zaraNe AvI chuM. mArA vIrAo! tame mArI ane mArA putranI rakSA karI zakazo? hamaNAM ja navA rAjA ajitasenanA sainiko AvI pahoMcaze. amane joze to jotAMnI sAthe ja e amAro vadha karaze! e mahArAjA siMharathano vaMzavelo naSTa karavA icche che. jyAre huM koI paNa rIte rAja kumArane jIvato rAkhavA icchuM chuM. "jIvato nara bhadrA pAme!" mATe mArI tamane vinaMtI che ke tame amArI, mAtA-putranI rakSA karo. amane chupAvI gho. "bahena!' prabhAtasiMhe kamalaprabhAne potAnI sagI bahena karI. bahena, tuM nizcita rahe, ame tamArA baMnenI saMpUrNa rakSA karIzuM! ajitasenanA ghoDesavAro bhale Ave. tamane e zodhI nahIM zake. paNa eka vAta...' 83 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #96
bolo, zI vAta che?' bALarAjAne kuSTharoga lAgI jaze!' bhale lAge!" "to nirbhaya raho!' jIvato nara bhadrA pAme che. e jIvaMta raheze to eno roga huM dUra karavA game tyAMthI vaidyarAja laI AvIza...' to bhale prabhAtasiMha ane zikharasiMha - A be sAtaso kuSTharogInA samUhanA AgevAno hatA. alabatta te baMne paNa kuSTharogathI grasta hatA ja; paraMtu buddhizALI hatA. sAtaso kuSTharogIonA kAphalAnI vacce amane mA-dIkarAne chUpAvI dIdhAM. ajitasenanA sainiko AvyA! cAreya bAju tapAsa karI na maLI paNa rANI ke na maLyo bALarAjA. ghaNI zodha karavA chatAM na maLyAM. nirAza thaIne sainiko pAchA cAlyA gayA. caMpAmAM sattAnuM parivartana thayuM. rAjasiMhAsane ajitasena beTho ane potAnI ANa manAvI. rANI kamalaprabhAne tathA bAla rAjakumArane sArI rIte bacAvI levAmAM AvyAM. tyArabAda meM sAtaso koDhI puruSo samakSa mArI karamakathA kahI saMbhaLAvI. sahunI AMkho bhInI thaI gaI. meM kahyuM: mArA bhrAtAo! mArA lAlane. mArA rAja kumArane tamane soMpIne jAuM. chuM. e haju cAra varSano che. covIza varSano thAya tyAM sudhI te gupta ja rahevo joIe. e caMpAno rAja kumAra che - A vAta kyAre ya koInA mukhe na AvavI joIe.... have e tamArA ja kuSThIonA kAphalAno eka sadasya banI gayo che. avAranavAra huM ene jovA jarUra AvatI-jatI rahIza.' meM prabhAtasiMhane tathA zikharasiMhane zrIpAlanI javAbadArI soMpI. baMnee rANIne AzvAsana ApyuM ke rAja kumAra amArI pAse surakSita raheze. alabatta A roga saMsargajanya hovAthI kumArane kuSTharoga thaze kharo. paNa enuM jIvana salAmata raheze... huM tarata ja tyAMthI nIkaLI gaI. ajitasenanA guptacarothI bacavA meM paNa mArA piyara kAzI javAnA badale zrAvatinI pAse svAmI bAdarAyaNanA mayaNA 87 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #97
AzramamAM javAnuM nakkI karyuM. mArI sAthe prabhAtasiMha Avyo. mane bAdarAyaNa AzramamAM mUkI te pAcho potAnA sthAne pahoMcI gayo. prabhAta ane zikhare vicAra karIne zrIpAlanuM nAma "uMbara' pADI dIdhuM. tene paNa samajAvI dIdhuM ke "tane tAruM nAma koI pUche to kahevAnuM ke mAruM nAma ubara che!" huM putrane mUkIne cAlI to kharI... paNa putrathI vikhUTA paDavAnI e chellI paLo hatI. huM caMpAnI rAjarANI hatAza banI, hAtha para hAtha mUkI, vivaza banI beThI beThI mArA ane kumAranA takadIrane rotI hatI. siMhAsanArUDha thaye tyAre be varSa paNa pUrAM thayAM na hatAM, tyAM to ene enA ja rAjyamAMthI vidAya levAnI veLA AvI hatI. enI samasta AzAo para enA badhAya umaMga ne utsAha para jANe hima paDI gayuM hatuM. zuM zuM ummIdo hatI, kevAM kevAM aramAna hatAM? jyAre samaya Avyo e ummIdo ane aramAno pUrAM thavAnI jyAre AzA hatI, barAbara tyAre ja mane choDIne, sukha-madirAno pyAlo hoThe aDyo na aDyo tyAM to e nIce paTakAyo ane cUrecUrA thaI gayo. e sukhamadirA mATImAM maLI gaI. mArAM e AMsu, Aha ne nisAsA viphaLa na gayAM! tapta AMkho ane dhakhadhakhatA hRdayamAMthI nIkaLIne te A bAhya jagatamAM AvyA hatA. samayanA vahevA sAthe e paNa ThaMDA thavA lAgyA. samayanA zILA samIranI thApalIo khAIne eNe kevuM suMdara svarUpa Aje dhAraNa karI lIdhuM che! Aje A mArA lAlane joIne koNa jANe kema haiyuM bharAI Arva che! AMsu sarI paDe che ane hRdayamAM tophAna macI gayuM che! kuSTharogIono kAphalo dina-rAta padayAtrA karato, caMpAnI sImAne atikramIne niraMjanA nadInI pelI pAranA ghanaghora araNyamAM pahoMcI gayo. jaMgAnuM nAma hatuM "bRhadAraNya'. bRhadAraNyanI aMdara ja girikaMdarAo hatI. girikandarAomAM sAtaso kuSTharogI nivAsa karI zake teTalI jagA hatI. jaMgalamAM khAdya-bhakSya phaLo vipula pramANamAM prApya hatAM ane niraMjanA nadInuM pIvA mATe madhura pANI hatuM. temano jIvananirvAha sArI rIte cAlu thayo. have bhikSA mATe gAmanagaromAM javAnI jarUra nahotI rahI. 88 apaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #98
maNA avicalapaNa teo titikSApUrvaka potAnI vyAdhijanya vedanA dhIra bhAvI sahavA lAgyA. paraMtu bALarAjA uMbara mAtAno viraha sahana karI zakato nathI, e mAtAne jhaMkhe che... e raDe che... mAtAne zodhe che... e khAto nathI... pIto nathI... enA zarIrane saMbhALavA chatAM roganA DAgha to paDavA zarU thaI ja gayA hatA. prabhAtasiMhe uMbarane ramavA-khelavA mATe be bALako paNa lAvI dIdhAM hatAM. uMbarane mitro maLatAM te hasI paDyo. re

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14 'mA, tuM to mane kuSTharogIone bhaLAvIne cAlI gaI hatI. huM to tyAre sAva nAno hato. mA vinA na jIvI zakAya, evI mArI sthiti hatI. paNa tuM mane kAraNosara koDhI-vastImAM mUkIne, prabhAtakAkAne ne zikharakAkAne soMpIne cAlI gaI hatI. huM ghaNA divasa rahyo hato. tArI pAse AvavA dhamapachADA karyA hatA. meM ghaNA divasa sudhI khAdhuM na hatuM... bhUkhyo ne tarasyo sUI jato hato. 90 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mA! tArA vinA meM mAthAM pachADyAM hatAM... mane kyAM khabara hatI ke mAro kAko duzmana banIne mane mArI nAMkhavA icchato hato! prabhAtakAkA ane zikharakAkA mane jIvanI jema jALavatA hatA. mane ekalAne jarA ya dUra javA detA na hatA. temaNe mArA mATe eka suMdara guphA pasaMda karI hatI. emAM suMvALuM bichAnuM pAthareluM hatuM. jamavA mATe cAMdInI thALI rAkhI hatI. teo kema mArA mATe pakSapAta karatA hatA, te mane zarUAtamAM nahotuM samajAtuM.' mArA zarIra para paNa kuSTharoga phelAvA lAgyo hato. mArA eka hAthanAM AMgaLAMnAM TeravAM kharI paNa paDyAM hatAM. mArA paganI AMgaLIo paNa saDavA lAgI hatI... chatAM mArA jamaNA hAthanI hatheLI ane AMgaLIo nIrogI hatI. mArI mA, mane tArA para ghaNI vAra gusso Avato. teM mane ApeluM vacana tuM bhUlI gaI hatI. meM kahyuM : jA tArI kiTTA che! tuM ahIM AvavAnI hatI, na AvI. samAcAra paNa na mokalyA... ahIM kAkA kahe che ke tyAM vaizAlImAM khUba ja azAMti che. magadha ane vaizAlI be mahAsattAo laDAInA Are AvIne UbhI che ane tethI dareka bhayabhIta che. AsapAsa eTalA bhaya, AzaMkA ane gUMcavADo che ke patro paNa nirdhArita sthAne pahoMcatA nathI. mA, A jaMgala have mane gamyuM che. e khUba suMdara che. cAreya tarapha For Private And Personal Use Only praNA

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lIlotarI ja lIlotarI che. have meM joyuM ke prakRti-sauMdarya zuM che. savAre ahIM jAtajAtanAM suMdara pakSIo dekhAya che. tuM to temane joIne pAgala thaI gaI hota! tuM ahIM amArI sAthe kema nathI AvI jatI? ApaNane ahIM eTalI badhI majA paDI gaI hota! haju mAre tane kazuMka vadhAre kahevuM che. ame ahIM eka parvatIya guphAmAM rahIe chIe. A guphA eka nAnakaDI TekarI para che. A eka aghorI bAvAnI jagA hatI. ahIM bhoMyataLiyAmAM eka kUvo che. zuM koI divasa kalpanA paNa Ave? paNa kUvAnuM pANI khUba gaMdhAya che. tethI ame teno upayoga nathI karatA. najIkamAM ja eka jharaNuM vahe che. temAMthI ame pIvAnuM pANI bharIe chIe. unALAnA vaizAkhamAM paNa A pANI ThaMDuMgAra hoya che. ahIM amArI sAthe eka baMgALI kAkA che. huM temane vaidakAkA kahuM chuM. teo Akho divasa hUko gagaDAvyA kare che! bAkI Ama bahu sArA che. teo mArI pAse vAto kare che. pattAM rame che ane sarasa gIto gAya che.. paNa bicArA... temanuM nAka saDI gayuM che. paga paNa saDI gayA che. temanAM patnI baMgALInA suprasiddha lekhikA che. teo temanA dIkarA sAthe maLavA AvyAM che. dIkaro kITu khUba ja majAno che. meM tenI sAthe dostI karI che. tenI sAthe ramavAnI khUba majA Ave che. te mane "dAdA kahe che ne mArI sAthe sAthe pharyA kare che. mA, huM tane khUba yAda karuM chuM. divasamAM hajAra vAra. tuM mane yAda kare che ke bhUlI gaI? te haju sudhI mane kema kAgaLa lakhyo nathI? amArA prabhAtakAkA aThavADiyAmAM be vAra zaheramAM jAya che.... pAchA vaLatAM patra letA Ave che. huM AturatAthI tArA patranI rAha jouM chuM. koIka divasa to teo tAro kAgaLa lAvaze ne? mArI mA, ahIM ghanaghora aMdhAruM che. kaI tithi che te khabara nathI. te divase meM je aMdhArAnI vAta karI hatI, te haju cAlu che. ame Akho divasa paDyA rahIe chIe. jyAre bhUkha lAge tyAre UThIne khAIe ne pAchA sUI jaIe. ane zuM khAIe? mAtra kaDhI! roja kaDhI ja! divaso vize vigatavAra tane kahI na zakuM. kAraNa ke keTalA divaso vItI gayA mA For Private And Personal Use Only

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te ja mane khabara nathI. ATalA divasothI sUraja Ugyo ja nathI. badhe aMdhAruM... cAreya tarapha mAtra aMdhAruM che. huM khUba kaMTALI gayo chuM. paNa huM zuM karI zakuM? ' are, eka vAta kahevAnI to bhUlI ja gayo. tane kAgaLa lakhyA pachI ame amAruM raheThANa badalIne bhoMyarAmAM rahevA gayA chIe. kAkA kahe che : yuddha zarU thaI gayuM che. joke havAmAM khUba dhULa che. pahelAM thoDA divasa to ame zvAsamAM dhULa letA hatA. kharekhara dhULa ja khAtA hatA. rUmAlane ame philTara tarIke vAparatA. have dhULa thoDI ochI thaI che. paNa aMdhAruM emanuM ema ja che. A kevA prakAranI laDAI haze? kAkA kahe che ke A badhuM bhAre bANavarSAnA lIdhe thayuM che. jyAM sudhI vAtAvaraNamAMthI dhULa heThI nahIM besI jAya tyAM sudhI prakAza nahIM thAya. kharekhara prakAza Avaze? huM to gAMDo thaI jaIza. amArA bhoMyarAmAM je pANI che te to sAva kharAba che. A pANI khUba gaMdhAya che. amAre te pIvuM paDe che. bIjo koI upAya nathI. pariNAme amAro kuSTharoga vadhu vakarI rahyo che. joke have e pANI pIvAmAM ame TevAI gayA chIe. nahitara bIjuM karI paNa zuM zakAya? kAkA kahe che : keTalAka divasa amAre A pANI ja pIvuM paDaze. tyAM badhuM kema che? tyAM paNa aMdhAruM che? tame to tyAM AvuM gaMduM pANI nahIM ja pItA ho, tamane to tyAM cokhkhuM pANI maLatuM haze? ahIMnA jevuM gaMdhAtuM nahIM hoya? jyArathI ahIM aMdhAruM thayuM che tyArathI mAro mitra kITu mAMdo paDyo che. te Akho divasa UMdhyA ja kare che. ame paNa divasano moTo bhAga sUtA ja rahIe chIe. paNa amArI pAse to ekabIjAne kahevA jevI vAto paNa hoya che. jyAre phITu to kaMI ja bolato nathI. Akho divasa te dardanA UMhakArA nAMkhyA kare che. tenA AkhA zarIre kuSTharoga phelAI gayo che. mane mAro patra ahIM ja pUro karavA de. huM thAkI nathI gayo paNa bahAra eTalI badhI ThaMDI che ke mArA hAtha lAkaDAnA thaI gayA che. mA, tuM sArI haze. tArA ubaranA praNAma. 92 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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priya mA, thoDI miniTo pahelAM ja kITu gujarI gayo. mane khabara nathI ke tene zI takalIpha hatI. huM tene Akho divasa raDato ja jato. tenA mAthAnA ane zarIranA badhA vALa kharI paDayA hatA. ane tenA nakha paNa ukhaDI gayA hatA. tenI AMkho lohI jevI lAlaghUma thaI gaI hatI. tenuM AkhuM zarIra cakAmAM ane DAghathI bharapUra hatuM. bicAro kITu! tene AvI rIte pIDAto huM joI zakato na hato. huM khUba ja DarI gayo chuM ne hRdayanI badhI vedanA ThAlavuM chuM. tAro uMbara. priya mA, mane khabara nathI ke huM tane zA mATe patro lakhyA karuM chuM. mane e paNa khabara nathI ke e tane pahoMcaze ke nahIM? kyAreka hAthamAM mazAla laI kAkA bahAra jAya che. bahAra atizaya ThaMDI che. aMdara paNa ghaNI ThaMDI che. ame khUNAmAM agni peTAvIe chIe. amAruM badhuM kAma ame tenA prakAzamAM ja karIe chIe. baLataNa mATe lAkaDAM lAvavAnAM hoya to kAkA bahAra nIkaLe che. teo bahAra jAya tyAre burakhA jevo vicitra pozAka pahere che. tyAre teo bhUta jevA lAge che. temane AvA vezamAM joI mane hasavuM Ave che. vaidyakAkA mArI sAthe have ramatA nathI. kITunA mRtyu pachI teo ekalAataDA ja rahe che. ane have temano tamAkuno sToka khalAsa thaI gayA pachI temanA manoraMjana mATe, paNa kaMI bacyuM nathI. kAkI bahu bolakAM na hatAM. paNa have huM jouM chuM ke teo jAta sAthe vAto karatA hoya che. kAkA paNa ghaNI vAra vAto karatA hoya che paNa chAnImAnI; gusapusa ja. mArI sAthe koI vAto nathI karatuM. mane khUba ekaluM lAge che tethI huM tApaNAnA ajavALe tane kAgaLa lakhuM chuM. mArA manamAM je kaMI Ave te huM tane lakhuM chuM. ApaNe maLIzuM tyAre huM ja tane A badhA kAgaLo rUbarU ApIza. barAbara ne?, tAro uMbara. priya mA, keTalAka divaso pahelAM eka bapore prakAzano jhabakAro thayo ane amAruM baporanuM rojiMdu khANuM pUruM karI peluM gaMduM pANI pItA hatA, eTalAmAM to kAkIe ociMtAnI cIsa pADI ane bahAra doDI gayAM. vaidyakAkA tene zAMta pADavA bahAra doDI gayA paNa prabhAtakAkAe temane rokyA. pelo vicitra mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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burakho paherAvyo ane te baMne kAkIne zodhavA bahAra nIkaLyA. be-traNa kalAka pachI teo AvyA. kAkIne gharamAM laI AvyA. paNa teo khUba mAMdA paDI gayAM hatAM. temane peTamAM duHkhAvo thayo ane bahAranA jharaNAnuM pANI pIvAthI UlaTImAM lohI paDavA mAMDyuM. e pANI jherI rasAyaNathI dUSita thayeluM hatuM. tenA lIdhe e pANI pInAra bImAra paDI jatAM hatAM. eno artha e ja hato ke jIvanano bAkIno bhAga amAre kUvAnuM e gaMdhAtuM pANI ja pIvAnuM hatuM? nA, pIvAnAM cokhkhAM pANInI koI AzA na hatI. oha.... kevI durgadha che e pANInI! kevI cItarI caDe che enI? koIka upAya vicArIe chIe. zarIra para kuSTharoga vadhI rahyo che. sAtasoe sAtaso puruSo rogathI trAsI UDyA che. tAro uMbara. priya mA, tane A chello kAgaLa lakhuM chuM. joke badhA kAgaLa mAre tane hAthohAtha ja ApavAnA che. chellA keTalAya divasothI mane tAva rahe che ane peTamAM sakhata du:khe che. mane khUba nabaLAI lAgavAnI zarUAta thaI gaI che. have huM patra nahIM lakhI zakuM. kadAca have huM lAMbo samaya A jagatamAM nahIM houM. mA, tyAM sudhImAM tuM ahIM AvI jaIza to ApaNe maLI zakIzuM. tane ahIM AvavAnuM mana nathI thatuM? hA, ahIM kharekhara naraka ja che... ame sAtaso kuSTharogI narakamAM ja jIvIe chIe... amArAM zarIromAMthI lohI ane paruM jharyA kare che. zarIranAM aMgopAMga saDI gayelAM che. durgadhano koI pAra nathI... paNa ame to varSothI TevAI gayA ne! tamArAthI, nagarajanothI A durgadha sahana na thAya tevI che. mA, mane kyAreka tArA para tiraskAra chUTe che. teM mane e ajitasenanA sainiko dvArA mAro vadha thavA dIdho hota to sAruM thAta... A duHkhabharI duniyAthI chUTI jAta.. bAkI, AvA yAtanAmaya jIvanano koI artha nathI. jIvanano koI AnaMda nathI, mane prabhAtakAkAe kahyuM hatuM ke huM caMpAnagarIno rAjA hato. huM be varSano hato ne mAro rAjyAbhiSeka thayo hato... kAraNa ke mArA pitArAjA acAnaka mRtyune bheTyA hatA. huM be varSa sudhI rAjA rahyo ane 94 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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pachI paristhiti palaTAI. tuM mane laIne rAtorAta bhAgI. mane bacAvavA teM A kuSTharogIonA ToLAmAM mane soMpI dIdho... mA, huM jIvI to rahyo chuM paNa kevuM trAsamaya jIvana che mAruM? tuM kyAreka AvIne mane joI jAya che... mAruM kuSTharogathI grasita zarIra joIne tArI AMkho bharAI Ave che... tuM raDe che... paNa tuM mane aDI zakatI nathI... mArA mAthe tAro hetALa hAtha pheravI zakatI nathI. tArA vAtsalyabharyA khoLAmAM mane laI zakatI nathI... tArI vivazatA huM jANuM chuM mA, chatAM mane tArA para gusso Ave che... tAre mane jIvavA devo nahoto joIto... huM marI jAta... to tane thoDA divasa putravirahanI vedanA raheta, paraMtu pachI dhIredhIre e vedanA dUra thaI jAta ane pachI kAkAno bhaya paNa tane na raheta... tuM rAjamahelamAM rahI zakata... Aje mArA ja kAraNe tAre gupta veze ane gupta sthAne rahevuM paDe che. tArA para satata bhayanAM vAdaLa chavAyelAM rahe che... Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mA, have to varSo vItI gayAM, mAro bAlyakALa vItI gayo. kizoraavasthA cAlI gaI ane yauvanamAM meM praveza karyo che. jema jema huM moTo thato jAuM chuM tema tema mane mArA ane tArA vicAro khUba satAve che. huM eka rAjakumAra ane tuM eka rAjarANI! varSothI ApaNe krUra kALano ane adRzya durbhAgyano sAmano karatAM jIvI rahyAM chIe. kyAreka e krUra durbhAgya para roSe bharAIne mAthAM pachADyAM che, mArI vivazatA 52 krodha Avyo che ane e krodha AMkho vATe azrurUpe TapakI paDelo che. nirAzAnA ghora aMdhArA vacce ApaNe kyAM sudhI jIvavAnuM? mArI mA, eka divasa vahelI savAre prabhAtakAkAe ane bIjA sAthI puruSoe mArI pAse AvIne kahyuM : 'uMbara! ame sahue eka sAro nirNaya karyo che!' samaNA huM kaMI bolyo nahIM. e sahunI sAme joI rahyo. ame tane amAro rAjA banAvavAno nirNaya karyo che! ame sAtaso mANaso... tane amAro rAjA banAvIzuM! AvatIkAle A ja araNyamAM tAro rAjyAbhiSeka karIzuM!' huM kaMI nA bolyo. mauna rahyo. sAMbhaLato rahyo. mArA manamAM vicAro jhabakyA : 'huM rAjA banuM ke prajAjana rahuM, ahIM zo pharaka paDavAno che? For Private And Personal Use Only 95

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96 Ame ya A badhA ja sAthIdAro mane mArA bAlyakALathI prema ApI rahyA che! mane mAna ApI rahyA che! pachI mAre bIjuM zuM joIe? zA mATe prabhAtakAkA mane rAjA banAvavAno upakrama race che? zuM haze emanA manamAM? huM samajI zakato nathI... emanA mukha para ullAsa che. rogathI gaLI gayelI emanI kAyAe jANe navuM rUpa dhAraNa karyuM hatuM. meM mArI mauna saMmati ApI dIdhI hatI.' tAro uMbara. mANA

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16 bIjA divase 700 svajanonI hAjarImAM mAro rAjyAbhiSeka thaI gayo hato. mAruM nAma "ubararANA rAkhavAmAM AvyuM hatuM. mane savArI karavA mATe eka khaccara ApavAmAM AvyuM hatuM. mArA lalATe lAla kumakumanuM tilaka karavAmAM AvyuM hatuM. amAro paDAva mAlavadeza ane madhyapradezanI sImA para nAMkhavAmAM Avyo hato. nadI hatI. nadImAM svaccha pANI hatuM. nadInA kinAre pahADonI TekarIo hatI. TekarIomAM guphAo hatI... ane kayAMka kayAMka sapATa medAna hatAM. amAro sAtaso mANasono kAphalo tyAM phelAIne goThavAI gayo hato. prabhAtakAkAe mArA mATe (huM rAjA hato ne!) rasoDuM banAvyuM hatuM. tyAM rasoI banatI hatI, rasoDAnA dhumADiyAmAMthI dhumADAnI sIdhI pAtaLI sera nIkaLatI hatI. lAla mATInA dhumADiyAmAMthI nIkaLato dhumADo AsamAnI hato. paNa e vasaMtanA AsamAnI AkAzamAM sarato tyAre rAkhoDI raMgano banI jato. huM e dhUmra sera joIne kazIka gaNatarI mAMDI rahyo hato. mArA mATe je ghAsanI suMdara jhUMpaDI banAvI hatI tenA daravAjA pAsenA boraDInA vRkSa para jaMgalI madhamAkhIo beThI hatI. jANe e vanarAjImAM bIjA koI puSpo ja na hoya tema e boraDI paranI maMjarIonA gucchane cUsI rahI hatI. camelInAM ane caMpAnA khIlatAM phUlone jANe A madhamAkhIo sAva visarI gaI hatI. mane thayuM ke A kALI ane sonerI madhamAkhIonI AvatI-jatI hAranA raste cAlyo jAuM to madhamAkhIoe je vRkSa para madhapUDo bAMdhyo hoya tyAM sudhI pahoMcI javAya. madhapUDAmAM khullA pILA raMganuM madha chalakatuM haze. madhapUDo zodhavo e mahattvanuM kAma hatuM, bIjAM kAma pachI paNa thaI zake. baporano nAjuka taDako mArA hRdayamAM spaMdana jagAvI rahyo hato. boraDI paranI maMjarIone vaLagelI madhamAkhIonI mAphaka bapora mane vaLagI! have mayaNA 97 For Private And Personal Use Only

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haiyuM hAtha kema rahe? have A ghara-khetara vaTAvIne AmravRkSonI katAra vIMdhIne vihetI nadI tarapha jatA rastA para pahoMcyA vinA kema cAle? madhapUDo e nadInA jharaNAnI AsapAsanA koI vRkSa para ja baMdhAyo haze. huM AmravRkSone pAra karI, AgaLa vadhyo. retIno rasto kore mUkI huM pUrva dizAmAM doDavA lAgyo. doDatI vakhate mane jarA ya pagano duHkhAvo na thayo. A rastA para doDavAnuM mane gamyuM. huM dhIme dhIme doDato rahyo. have vanarAjIno cheDo AvI gayo hato. retInA paTamAM gati ApoApa ghaTI gaI. have utarANa AvatuM hatuM. huM thoDI vAra aTakyo. badAmI retI ane pAInavRkSo AsamAnI AkAzanI kora maDhI rahyAM hatAM. nAnAM sthira vAdaLAM rUnA pola jevAM lAgatAM hatAM. huM joto hato tyAM thoDI vAra mATe sUrya vAdaLa pAchaLa chupAI gayo ane vAdaLAM rAkhoDI raMganAM thaI gayAM. "rAta paDe e pahelAM varasAdanI jharamara Avaze! meM vicAryuM. DhoLAva mohaka hato. e retIno ghero paTa hato. baMne bAju lImaDAnAM vRkSo hatAM, tarehatarehanAM vRkSo mahorI UThyAM hatAM. A badhAM vRkSo mArAM paricita hatAM. eTale eka eka vRkSane premathI maLato... eka eka choDane snehathI sparzato huM dhIre dhIre cAlato hato. rastAnI ugamaNI kore DhoLAva hato, tyAMthI vIsa phUTa dUra eka jharaNuM hatuM. kinAro bhAtabhAtanI vanarAjIthI sabhara hato. A gIca vanarAjInA zItaLa aMdhakAramAMthI rasto karI e jharaNA tarapha huM AgaLa vadhyo. jharaNA pAse pahoMcatAM ja eka anokhI prasannatAno anubhava karI rahyo. majAnI ekAMta jagA hatI. kUvAnuM pANI jevuM nirmaLa jharaNuM retImAMthI ja phUTI nIkaLatuM hatuM. jANe kinArAonA be lIlAchama hAthomAM jhilAyuM hoya evuM e lAgatuM hatuM. jyAMthI jharaNuM phUTatuM hatuM tyAM pANI bhamarIo khAtuM hatuM. aMdara retInA kaNa kaMpamAna lAgatA hatA. kinArAnI pelI pAranuM mukhya jharaNuM jarA vadhu UMcAI parathI phUTatuM hatuM. cUnAnA sapheda paththaro vaccethI rasto karIne e AgaLa vadhatuM hatuM ane DhoLAva para vegathI vahIne vaLAMkamAM DhaLI jatuM hatuM. vaLAMkamAM vaheto pravAha ziva-sarovaramAM bhaLI jato hato. ziva-sarovara kSiprA nadInA eka bhAgarUpe hatuM. nadI uttare samudramAM jaI maLatI hatI. A jharaNuM zarU thaI aMte mahAsAgarane maLe che, e kalpanA ja mane uttejita karI mUkatI hatI. mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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doDavAnA kAraNe have mane thAka ane ukaLATa thavA lAgyo. paraMtu pachI tarata ja dhUsara raMganAM kotarono zItala sparza meM anubhavyo. bhUrA raMganA adhovastrane meM UMcuM laI lIdhuM ane mArA rajoTAyelA paga e chIcharA jharaNAmAM boLyA. paganI AMgaLIo retIne aDatI hatI. pANI e AMgaLIo ane majabUta ghUMTaNa vaccethI vahI jatuM hatuM. pANI khUba ThaMDuM ane dhAradAra hatuM. mArA paga sAthe ramata karatuM e vaheNa kalanAda karI rahyuM hatuM. meM vahetA pANImAM AmathI tema cAlI joyuM. mArA paga suMvALA paththaro joDe ghasAtA hatA. ekAeka meM thoDeka AgaLa caLakatI mAchalIonuM ToLuM joyuM. chIcharA pANImAM chabachabiyAM karato huM tyAM gayo. paNa mAchalIo ekAeka adRzya thaI gaI. jANe e kyAreya hatI ja nahIM! lImaDAnA vRkSanA mULa pAse pANI UMDuM hatuM. huM tyAM namIne Ubho rahyo... kadAca mAchalIo dekhAze! paNa ekAeka kAdava nIcethI eka deDako kUdI paDyo! eka kSaNa e mArI sAme joI rahyo, pachI DarI gayo hoya ema pAcho vRkSanA mULa pAsenA UMDA pANImAM sarI gayo. huM hasI paDyo! Dara nahIM, huM tane pakaDIza nahIM." huM bolyo. havAnA kAraNe uparanA vRkSanI be DALI chUTI paDI ane enI vaccethI taDako mArA mAthA para ne khabhA para DhoLAyo. paga pANImAM hoya tyAre mAthA para sUryano uSmAbharyo sparza mane gamyo. paNa vaLI pavananI laherakhI baMdha paDI gaI ane taDako pAcho vRkSa para caDI gayo. huM sAme kinAre gayo, tyAM vRkSo ochAM hatAM. nAnuM khajUrInuM jhADa tenI sAthe ghasAyuM. mane acAnaka yAda AvyuM ke khissAmAM cappa paDyuM che. meM jaLacakkI banAvavAno vicAra karyo. joke meM kyAreya AvI jaLacakkI banAvI na hatI. dAdImAno putra olivara dariyA parathI ghera Avato tyAre jaLacakkI banAvI Apato. huM tarata ja jaLacakkI banAvavA besI gayo. pANI UMDuM na hatuM, paNa vegamAM vahetuM hatuM. tADanAM pAMdaDAMnI cakkI goThavI, tene vega ApavA AMgaLAMthI calAvI. vahetA pANIno vega-sparza pAMkhiyAne vega ApI rahyo ane pAMkhiyAM uparathI nIce ane nIcethI upara javA mAMDyAM, jaLacakkI cAlu thaI gaI. bahu sahajatAthI e cAlI rahI hatI, meM UMDo zvAsa lIdho ane pravAhanI pAse ja retImAM laMbAvyuM. mArI AMkho jaLacakkInI camatkArika gatine nihALI rahI hatI. upara-nIce, nIce-upara mayaNA 99 For Private And Personal Use Only

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thatI e jaLacakkI dilacaspa hatI. peTALamAMthI pANI phUTatuM ja rahevAnuM. eno Acho-pAtaLo pravAha kyAM ya sudhI vaheto ja rahevAno. vRkSa parathI kharatAM pAMdaDAMthI vikSepa na paDe to A jaLacakkI cAlu ja rahevAnI. huM moTo thAuM, bApu jevaDo thAuM tyAre ya A jharaNuM evuM ne evuM ja vahetuM raheze, ema mane lAgyuM. eka khUMcato paththara meM haDaselyo. jamInamAM thoDo khADo karyo ane hAthanuM ozIkuM karIne sUto. haLavI hUMphALI rajAI jevo uSmAbharyo ane pAtaLo taDako mArA deha para patharAyo. retImAM paDyo paDyo huM susta AMkhe jaLacakkI sAme joI rahyo hato. jaLacakkInI gati taMdrAmAM nAMkhI de tevI madhura hatI. tADanAM pAMdaDAMnAM pAMkhiyAMnI gati sAthe mArI AMkho jhilamila thatI hatI. pAMkhiyAmAMthI ekIsAthe TapakatAM jaLabiMduo ulkAthI dorAtI tejarekhAo jevAM dekhAtAM hatAM. vahetA pANIno avAja bilADInA baccAnA bacakArA jevo hato. deDakAnuM saMgIta thoDI vAra vAtAvaraNamAM patharAyuM. paNa pachI e cUpa thaI gayo. rUnA pola jevAM mota vAdaLothI AcchAdita AsamAnI AkAza mArA para toLAI rahyuM hatuM ne mArI AMkho maLI gaI! huM jAgyo tyAre mane lAgyuM ke huM koI judI ja duniyAmAM chuM! eka kSaNa to, A svapna nathI, evo vicAra AvI gayo. sUrya adRzya thaI gayo. hato. enI sAthe tejachAyAnI lIlA paNa saMkelAI gaI hatI. lImaDAnAM kALAM thaDa have adRzya thaI gayAM hatAM. caMpAnAM camakatAM lIlAM pAMdaDAM paNa dekhAtAM na hatAM. jaMgalI caeNrInI zAkhAo vacce sUrye pAtharelI sonerI bhAta paNa have jaNAtI na hatI. AkhuM jagata dhUsaravaraNuM thaI gayuM hatuM. dhodhamAMthI UThatAM jaLasIkaro jevuM jhAkaLa mArI tvacAne galIpacI karI rahyuM hatuM. jhAkaLa ekIsAthe hUMphALuM ane zItaLa hatuM. huM catto pharyo ane pArevAnI narama bhUkharI chAtI jevA AkAza para mITa mAMDI. kUNo choDa jema haLavI jharamarane samAvI le tema huM jhINI jharamara jhIlI rahyo. mAro cahero bhIMjAI gayo ane khamIsa paNa bhInuM lAgavA mAMDyuM, eTale huM Ubho thayo; paNa tarata aTakI gayo. huM sUto hato tyAre koI haraNa jharaNA para AvyuM hatuM. pUrva kinArA para tAjAM pagalAM dekhAtAM hatAM ane e pANInI kinArI pAse aTakatAM hatAM. pagalAM UMDAM ane aNIdAra 100 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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hatAM. eTale e koI moTI haraNInAM haze, ema lAgyuM. kadAca enA peTamAM bacyuM haze. vaheLA sudhI AvI haze ane pANI pIdhuM haze. pachI ene gaMdha AvI haze! e bhayathI nAsI gaI haze. evuM to pagalAM parathI cokakasa lAgatuM hatuM. huM manomana icchato hato ke e haraNI tarasI pAchI na pharI hoya to sAruM. meM bIjAM pagalAM paNa tapAsyAM. khisakolIoe sArI evI dhamAcakaDI bolAvI hatI. eka hiMsaka paza paNa ahIM AvyuM hoya ema enAM aNiyALAM nahoravALAM pagalAM parathI lAgyuM. paNa e kyAre AvI gayuM haze, eno khyAla mane Avyo nahIM. mArA bApune (kAkAne) AvI bAbatomAM bhAre sUjha hatI. evuM eka anumAna kharuM hatuM ke koI haraNI. ahIM AvI bhayabhIta thaI pAchI pharI gaI hatI. huM pharI pAcho jaLacakkI tarapha vaLyo. e jANe sadAkALa tyAM ja rahI hoya ema cAlI rahI hatI. Ama to pAMkhiyAM tADapatranAM hatAM paNa A chIcharA pANIpravAhamAM e TakI rahyAM hatAM ane AchA varasAdanA kAraNe caLakI rahyAM hatAM. meM AkAza sAme joyuM. atyAre keTalA vAgyA haze ke pote keTaluM sUto haze te mArAthI nakkI thaI zakyuM nahIM. huM pazcima kinAre pahoMcyo. tyAM rokAvuM ke nahIM, e vicArato Ubho hato tyAM varasAdanI jharamara sAva aTakI gaI. vAyavya dizAmAMthI havAnI laherakhI AvI ane sUrya bahAra nIkaLyo. vAdaLAM ekaThAM thaI gayAM ane pUrva dizAmAM meghadhanuSya kheMcAyuM. meghadhanuSya eTaluM manohara ane eTaluM raMgabharyuM hatuM ke ene jotAM mAruM hRdaya prasannatAthI chalakAI UThyuM. dharatI para Acho lIlo raMga patharAyo hato. varasAdamAM dhovAyelI adRzya havAe paNa sUryaprakAzamAM sonerI raMga dhAraNa karyo hato. jaLasIkarothI chaMTAyelAM vRkSo, ghAsa ane choDavAo camakI rahyAM hatAM. jema retImAMthI jharaNuM phUTI nIkaLe tema mArA aMtaramAMthI paNa AnaMdanuM jharaNuM phUTI nIkaLyuM. meM hAtha pahoLA karyA ane pheraphUdaDI pharavA mAMDyo. kyAMya sudhI pharato rahyo. phUdaDInI jhaDapa vadhatI gaI ane lAgyuM ke have kadAca paDI javAze tyAre zarIra DhIluM mUkyuM. AMkho mIMcI dIdhI ane jamIna paranA kuNA ghAsamAM cattopATa DhaLI paDyo. nIcenI ane AsapAsanI dharatI cakarAvA lAgI. meM AMkho kholI. bhUruM AkAza ane rUnA pola jevAM mayA 101 For Private And Personal Use Only

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vAdaLAM cakarAvo letAM hatAM. huM Ubho thayo. mane haju thoDI sustI lAgatI hatI, paNa aMtarathI huM bhAre mokaLAza anubhavI rahyo hato. huM pAcho pharyo. gharanI dizAmAM doTa mUkI. bhInAzathI maghamaghato pavana mArA UMDA zvAsomAM samAI rahyo hato. varasAdanA kAraNe paga nIcenI retI kaThaNa banI hatI. AthI pAchA pharavAmAM mane kazI ja takalIpha na paDI. sUraja AthamavA Avyo hato. lAla-sonerI raMgathI raMgAyelA pazcimanA AkAzane paDachAye vRkSo UMcAM ne kALAM dekhAtAM hatAM. huM amArA khetaramAM pravezyo. "sAMjanuM bhojana taiyAra thavA AvyuM haze. prabhAtakAkA nagaramAMthI pAchA na pharyA hoya to sAruM!" ema huM manomana icchI rahyo hato. kAraNa ke pachI ja mane khyAla Avyo ke kAkA bahAra gayA hatA tyAre pote gherathI Ama cAlyA javuM joItuM na hatuM. tyAM to meM vRddha ghoDAno haNahaNATa sAMbhaLyo. kAkA AvI gayA hatA. teo lAkaDAM levA jatA hatA. meM doTa mUkIne kahyuM : lAvo kAkA, huM lAkaDAM laI AvuM..." kAkAe TaTTAra thaI mArI sAme joyuM. thoDuM hasyA ane bolyA : "mane hatuM ja ke rAjA rakhaDavA nIkaLI paDyA haze!" 'huM kotara sudhI gayo hato.' meM paNa AvuM ja dhAryuM hota. huM nagaramAM jato hato tyAre vicArato hato ke "atyAre uMbaranuM mana bIjA koI kAmamAM nahIM lAge. huM paNa ubara jevaDo houM to AvA phakkaDa dahADe zuM karuM?' ane ekAeka mArA prazna mane javAba ApI dIdho : "huM bhaTakavA nIkaLI paDuM!" namatA sonerI sUryamAMthI paNa na sAMpaDe eTalI uSmA mArA hRdayamAM kAkAnA zabdothI chalakAI UThI. meM mastaka halAvIne kahyuM : "huM paNa ema ja bhaTakavA nIkaLI paDyo!' zrIpAlanuM mana smaraNonI sRSTimAM DUbI gayuM hatuM. eNe zaizavano AnaMda mANyo ja na hato, ema kaho to cAle. eNe ghaNA duHkhada anubhavonA ujharaDAo sahana karyA hatA. ekAMta jaMgalanI vizALatAmAM e sAtaso kuSTharogIo sAthe varSo sudhI rahyo hato. tene mAnavano sparza IjA kare tevo lAgato hato, paNa vanarAjIno sparza jANe praphullatA arpato hato. jaMgalanuM 102 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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jIvana vasamuM hatuM, chatAM A sthaLamAM e potAnI duniyA racI zakato. mANaso karatAM jaMgalanAM rAnI pazuo ochAM hiMsaka lAgatAM hatAM. rIMcha, varucitto ke dIpaDo ociMtI tarApa mArI jAya e samajAya evuM hatuM, paNa mAnavInI kUratAne e keme ya jIravI zakyo na hato. hamezAM nagarothI.. gAmothI dUra jaMgalomAM amAro paDAva raheto. kAkA zikharasiMhe thoDuM thoDuM vAMcatAM-lakhatAM zIkhavyuM hatuM. bAkI to kumaLAM hADakAM duHkhI Ave ne AMgaLIo bahera mArI jAya eTaluM kAma karavuM paDatuM hatuM. hamezAM anAjanI achata rahetI. eTale khetaramAM sArI evI mahenata karavI paDatI hatI. chatAM huM e badhAmAM rAjakumAra hato ne eTale mane thoDI sagavaDo vadhAre maLatI hatI. mAnavasvabhAvanI eka vicitra khAsiyata mane samajAvA lAgI hatI. pRthvI paranAM prANIomAM eka mANasajAta ja evI che ke je game tevI viparIta paristhiti ke vAtAvaraNane bahu jhaDapathI apanAvI le che. garama pradezanuM janAvara ThaMDA pradezamAM jIvI zakatuM nathI. khullA gaganamAM viharatAM paMkhI pIMjarAmAM bhAgye ja baccAM pedA karI zake che. khArA pANInAM mAchalAM mIThA pANImAM taraphaDIne marI jatAM hoya che paNa mANasa to game tevI hADamArI ke hAlAkIne vaza thaIne jIvI javAnI prakRti dharAve che! mAnavI nAmanA prANInI A mahAnatA haze? bhAdaravAnA chellA divaso hatA, kSiprA nadInA taTa para zItaLa ane prasanna tejasRSTi patharAI hatI. pILI camelI thoDI thoDI mahorI hatI. AkhA ye vistAramAM enI maheka chavAI gaI hatI. pIcanAM vRkSo paNa mahorI UThyAM hatAM. koyalanuM saMgIta Akho divasa cAlu rahetuM hatuM. pArevAMe mALA nAMkhyA hatA ane ghU..ghU..karI ekamekane bolAvatAM hatAM. prabhAtanAM prakAza jhaLahaLI rahyo hato. huM eka vaTavRkSane aDhelIne beTho hato. tyAM prabhAtakAkA ane zikharakAkA vagere dasapaMdara moTA puruSo mArI pAse AvIne UbhA. meM UbhA thaI sahune praNAma karyA. e badhA tyAM ja retImAM beThA. huM paNa beTho. prabhAtakAkA bolyA : uMbararANA, kAle savAre ApaNe ujjayinI nagarImAM javAnuM che." "zA mATe?" pUchyuM. mayaNA 103 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ujjayinInA rAjA prajApAla udAra che, dayALu che." tenuM zuM prayojana che?' rANA mATe rANI joIe ne?' eTale?' rAjA koI yogya kanyA Ape to tArAM lagna karIe!" lagnanI vAta sAMbhaLIne mane romAMca thayo... yuvAna puruSe lagna karavAM joIe, evuM meM sAMbhaLyuM hatuM... paraMtu kuSTharogI mATe lagna asaMbhava ja hoya! kuSThIne koNa potAnI kanyA paraNAve? azakya! vaLI, kuSTharogathI gherAyelo huM.. koI strIne sukha ApI paNa na zakuM ne?" huM AvA vicAro karato rahyo, tyAM kAkAe AjJA karI : kAle savAre ApaNe sahue ujjayinI nagarImAM javAnuM che. tAre ghoDA para besavAnuM che....' 104 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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na 17 ame ujjayinInA ugamaNA daravAjethI nagaramAM praveza karyo. huM eka khaccara jevA ghoDA para beTho hato. ghoDAnI lagAma pakaDIne javAnasiMha cAlato hato. mArI pAchaLa sAtasoe sAtaso kuSTharogI cAlI rahyA hatA. rasto dhULabharelo hato eTale amArA cAlavAthI khUba dhULa UDI rahI hatI. ujjayinInI prajA mATe A pahelo ja prasaMga hato ke nagaramAM eka sAthe sAtaso kuSTharogI AvI caDhyA hoya keTalAka rogInA hAtha kharI paDelA hatA to keTalAka laMgaDA hatA. keTalAka khAMsatA hatA to keTalAkanAM zarIra gumaDAMthI grasita hatAM. mAkhIo baNabaNatI hatI. koInA moDhAmAMthI lALa TapakI rahI hatI... koInA mAthAnA vALa UtarI gayelA hatAM. keTalAkanI cAmaDI saDI gayelI hatI. temanA zarIra para melAM vastro hatAM. bhayaMkara durgadha temanA zarIramAMthI phelAtI hatI. nagaravAsI loko trAsa pAmI rahyA hatA. nagaranA kUtarA bhasI rahyA hatA. tyAM rAjyanA maMtrI somadeva mArI pAse AvyA. prabhAtakAkA mArI sAthe cAlatA hatA. maMtrIe AjJA karI : UbhA raho.' ame UbhA rahyA. tame koNa cho ane nagaramAM zA mATe AvyA cho?' ame kuSTharogI chIe. nagarathI dUra kSiprAnA taTa para giri-guphAomAM rahIe chIe. Aje ame eka viziSTa prayojanathI nagaramAM AvyA chIe. kSamA karajo. amAre nagaramAM na AvavuM joIe, e ame jANIe chIe.. paNa.." prabhAtakAkA bolatA hatA. 'paNa zuM? zA mATe nagaramAM AvyA cho?' A azva para beThA te amArA rAjA che, rANA che. ame sAtaso kuSTharogI chIe. ame A yuvAnane amAro rAjA banAvyo che.." maMtrIe mArI sAme joyuM ane bolyA : bhale rAjA banAvyA, nagaramAM zA mATe AvyA? tamAre nagaramAM na mayamAM 105 For Private And Personal Use Only

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AvavuM joIe, e tame nathI jANatA?' 'mahAmaMtrI, amAre amArA rAjA mATe rANI joIe che! amane koI kanyA, mahArAjA Ape to rANA sAthe lagna karavA che!' 'oho... ema vAta che? tamAre rAjA mATe rANI joIe che ke bIjuM kaMI joIe che?' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'nahIM mahAmaMtrIjI, bIjuM badhuM amArI pAse che. amAre mAtra rAjA mATe rANI joIe che!' 'bhale, huM mahArAjAne vAta karuM chuM...' 'to ame AgaLa vadhatA nathI. A cokamAM ja rokAIe chIe...' 'nA, nA, nagarajano durgaMdhathI trAsI gayA che. tame be-cAra bhAIo ja rokAo, bAkInA badhA ja loko tamArA paDAvamAM pahoMcI jAya tema karo.' 'bhale, ame ema karIe chIe.' prabhAtakAkAe pAMca AgevAnone tyAM rAkhIne bAkInA badhA rogI puruSone amArA paDAvamAM mokalI ApyA. amane pAMcane laIne mahAmaMtrI, mahArAjAnI pAse AvyA. mahArAjA paNa potAnA rasAlA sAthe pharavA mATe nagaranI bahAra ughAnamAM jaI rahyA hatA. udyAnamAM ja eka latAmaMDapamAM teo beThA ane amane bolAvyA. ame dUra UbhA rahyA. mahAmaMtrIe kahyuM : 'mahArAjA, A sAtaso kuSTharogI che. ApaNI ujjayinIthI ghaNA dUra kSiprA nadInA taTa para giriguphAomAM teo vAsa karIne rahelA che. temanI pAse dhana-dhAnya che, khAvA-pIvAnuM che, paheravA-oDhavAnuM che... paNa temanA rAjAne rANI nathI!' 106 'eTale emano ya koI rAjA che?' 'hA jI, A uMbararANA amArA rAjA che!' mane prabhAtakAkA ghoDA parathI utArIne mahArAjAnI pAse laI gayA. mahArAjAe mane pagathI mAthA sudhI joI lIdho! kuSTharogathI vyApta mArA zarIrane joI lIdhuM. mArA DAbA hAthanI kharI paDelI AMgaLIo paNa joI ane AkhA zarIre paDelA DAdhothI vahetuM paruM paNa joyuM. 'mahArAjA, amane amArA rAjAne yogya kanyA joIe che. ame ene For Private And Personal Use Only mANA

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rANI banAvIzuM. vidhipUrvaka lagna karIzuM. Apa ApanA vizALa rAjyamAMthI ekAda kanyA ApavA kRpA karI amArA sAtaso ya mANasonI A ja eka yAcanA che... ame ApanI kIrti sAMbhaLI che ke Apa koI yAcakane khAlI hAtha pAcho nathI kADhatA. ame ApanI prazaMsA sAMbhaLI che eTale ja nagaramAM AvavAnuM sAhasa karyuM che, mahArAjA! A nagaranI prajA to dayALu che. nahitara loko amane gAma-nagaramAM pravezavA detA nathI. paththaro mAre che. haDadhUta kare che... lAkaDIonA prahAra kare che... paraMtu ahIMnI prajAe amane du:kha nathI ApyuM..." mahArAjA prajApAla UMDA vicAramAM paDI gayA. mahAmaMtrI ane bIjA rAjapuruSo paNa mauna UbhA rahyA. tyAM acAnaka mahArAjA jorathI bolI UThyA : maLI jaze, tamane kanyA maLI jaze! rAjakanyA maLI jaze!' "to pachI mahArAjA, Aje ame jaIe. Apa kaho tyAre ame AvIe..." AvatI kAle savAre rAjasabhAmAM ja Avo. tyAM ja tamane tamArA uMbararANA mATe rANI ApIza!' avazya?' prabhAtakAkA vAta nakkI karavA lAgyA. avazya. ujjayinInA rAjAnuM vacana kadApi na phare. tamane tamArA rANA mATe rANI maLaze ja! ame mahArAjAnA caraNe dUrathI praNAma karyA. emano upakAra mAnyo ane amArA mukAme javA pAchA vaLyA. "mahAmaMtrI! mArI abhimAnI putrI mayaNA mATe enAM karmo ja pati zodhI lAvyAM! A kuSTharogI yuvAna rAjA mArI putrIno pati banaze! huM Aje ene bolAvIne vAta karuM chuM. haju paNa jo e potAno durAgraha choDe to mAre ene vaizAlInA suMdara parAkramI rAjakumAra sAthe paraNAvavI che. paNa jo e potAno haThAgraha choDavAnI ja na hoya ane "mArA karmo ja mArA mATe pati lAvaze...' A vAta pakaDI rAkhavAnI hoya to enAM karmo A kuSTharogIne laI AvyAM che. paraNe ene ane AnaMdathI jIvana vitAve!" mahArAjA..."mahAmAtya somadeva mahArAjAnA caraNo pakaDIne bolyA : "choru mayaNA 107 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #117
choru thAya... mA-bApe evA na thavAya... mahArAjA... AvA kuSTharogI sAthe mayaNA jevI rAjakumArIne na paraNAvAya. mahArANI rUpasuMdarI paNa pasaMda nahIM kare.' 'mahAmaMtrI! to zuM huM pasaMda karuM chuM Ane pati tarIke? nA, A to mayaNAnAM karmonI pasaMdagI che! 'karma kare te thAya!' ema e chokarI kahe che ne? 'pitA kare te na thAya!' ema e mAne che. huM ene sukhI na karI zakuM, enAM karmo ja ene sukhI karI zake! ema e mAne che... Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'mahArAjA! Apa zAMta thAo. ApaNe pharIthI mayaNAne bolAvIne vAta karIe! ene samajAvIe. eno durAgraha choDAvIe... e nAnI che! nAnAM bALako thoDuM bhaNe-gaNe eTale uchAMchaLAM thaI jatAM hoya che. chatAM mayaNA to samajadAra chokarI che...' 'bhale, ApaNe samajAvIe. bolAvo ene.' rAjamahelanA suMdara sabhAkhaMDamAM mahArAjA prajApAla siMhAsana para beThA, bAjumAM mahArANI rUpasuMdarI beThAM. bIjI ta2pha mahAmaMtrI somadeva ane paMDitarAja subuddhi beThA. nagaranA pramukha zreSThIo paNa padhAryA hatA. mayaNA potAnI mAtA rUpasuMdarInI pAse beThI hatI. mahArAjAnI nikaTa beThI hatI. kSaNabhara sabhAkhaMDamAM mauna patharAyuM. tyAM mahArAjAe mayaNAne kahyuM : 'beTI, karmono pakSa choDI de. 'karma kare te thAya', evI mAnyatA tyajI de. tuM ema bola ke 'pitAjI! Apa je karazo te amArA sukha mATe haze! Apa ja amArAM sukha-duHkhanA vidhAtA cho. Apa dhAro to amane svarga ApI zako, Apa dhAro to amane narakamAM dhakelI zako!' eka kSaNa... be kSaNa... traNa kSaNa... mauna chavAyuM. cothI kSaNe visphoTa thayo. 108 'pitAjI! sarvajJa paramAtmAnuM vacana che ke karmo kare te thAya! A saMsAramAM dareka jIva karmothI baMdhAyelo che. karmone parAdhIna che. karma kare te ja thAya! sukha ane du:kha... yaza ne apayaza... badhuM ja karmonA prasAde thAya che. pitAjI! A duniyAmAM AvIne potAnI AzA-AkAMkSAo koNa pUrNa karI zakyuM? cira-milananuM sukha koNe meLavyuM che? thoDI ja paLono, thoDA ja divasono, thoDAM ja varSono... yA yugono saMyoga... ane basa, karmonI For Private And Personal Use Only samaNA

Page #118
krUratA ahIMthI saMsAranI jIvanakathA, sukhavArtA samApta kare che. viyoga.. viyoga... ciraviyoga... ane e para vahAvelAM AMsu, basa, e ja zeSa rahI jAya che, hRdaya saLagI UThe che. AMsuonAM pUra UbharAya che. UnA UnA ucchavAso nIkaLI paDe che ane aMte rahe che smRtirUpa dIpakanI aMka zyAmala dhUmrarekhA. jIva to pAmara che. karmonAM baMdhanothI jakaDAyelo che. tyAM "huM tane sukhI karI dauM!' evI mithyA kalpanA karavAno koI artha nathI.' "eTale mayaNA, tuM tArA nirNayamAM aTala che ne?" "hA jI, huM mArA nirNayamAM nahIM, sarvajJa paramAtmAnA siddhAMtamAM aTala chuM. saMsAramAM rahelA jIvone sukha-du:kha emanA potAnAM zubha-azubha karmonA udayathI maLe che - A vAta taddana sAcI che ne huM e vAtane mAnuM chuM." to bhale, mahArAjAnA mukha para krodhanI rekhAo taNAI AvI. temaNe mahAmaMtrIne kahyuM : 'tame pelA kuSTharogIonA rAjAne AvatIkAle rAjasabhAmAM bolAvI lejo. huM emane yogya rANI ApIza! emanAM zubha karmonA udayathI emane rAjakanyA maLaze!' samAcAra kuSTharogIonA paDAvamAM pahoMcI gayA. teo badhA khuzIthI nAcI UThyA. samAcAra rAjamahelamAM phelAyA. mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI ane mArA mAmA sAmatarAjA puNyapAlane paNa maLyA. te baMne atyaMta nArAja thayA. samAcAra nagaramAM phelAyA. keTalAka loko rAjI thayA, keTalAka loko nArAja thayA. keTalAke rAjAnI bhUla batAvI, keTalAke mayaNAnI bhUla batAvI. keTalAke A vivAdane ja anucita mAnyo. have eka vAta sarvatra spaSTa banI hatI ke mayaNA jo potAnA siddhAMtane vaLagI rahe to teNe kuSTharogI evA uMbararANAne pati tarIke svIkAravAnA hatA ane jo e potAno Agraha choDI de to ene eka rAjyanA devakumAra jevA rAjakumAra sAthe lagna karavAnAM hatAM duniyAnI dRSTie mayaNA jANIbUjhIne duHkhano mArga laI rahI hatI, jyAre jJAnInI dRSTie mayaNA satyanA kAMTALA mArga para pagalAM pADI rahI hatI, ke je satyaniSTha vyakti mATenI niyati hoya che! mayaNAne vaiSayika sukhonuM AkarSaNa na hatuM ke bAhya mANA 109 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #119
zArIrika duHkhonI paravA na hatI. eka kuSTharogathI gherAyelA yuvAnano pati tarIke svIkAra karavAmAM enuM mana pAchuM paDatuM na hatuM. e svIkAra karavA taiyAra hatI, tatpara hatI. mayaNAe jIvatejIva mRtyune AliMgana ApavAno nirNaya karyo. hAsyane tyAgI eNe hAhAkArane apanAvyo. prakAzane mUkI eNe aMdhakArano Azaro lIdho. vilAsane Thokara mArI eNe tapano prAraMbha karyo. raMgaberaMgI vastro choDI eNe zveta vastra aMgIkAra karyA. vinAzano, orA AvatA mRtyuno e karuNa ninAda sAMbhaLavA chatAM ya enuM dila kaMpatuM na hatuM. bIjA divase rAjasabhAmAM je te nirNaya thavAno hato. ubararANAne rAjasabhAmAM AvavAnuM nimaMtraNa maLI gayuM hatuM. nagaravAsI loko savArathI ja rAjasabhAmAM goThavAI jatA hatA. rAjasabhAmAM zaivo ane jaina, badhA ja potapotAnA sthAne besI gayA hatA. mahArAjA prajApAla siMhAsana para birAjamAna thayA hatA. paDadA pAchaLa rANIvAsa beTho hato. maMtrIo, mahAmaMtrIo, patio, sArthavAho ne zreSThIo potapotAnA sthAne besI gayA hatA, tyAM ubarANAe potAnA sAtasa sAthIdAro sAthe rAjasabhAmAM praveza karyo. uMbarANA mahArAjAnI pAse jaIne vinayapUrvaka Ubho rahyo. tyAM mAtA rUpasuMdarI sAthe gauravabharI damAmadAra cAle mayaNA AvI rahI hatI. mayaNAnuM mastaka unnata hatuM. enI AMkhomAM vIjaLI camakatI hatI. mukhamudrA para e ja dRDhatA, e ja pratApa ane e ja vibhUti hatI. pitAnI daSTi sAthe putrInI dRSTi maLI. rAjAe hajAro trizULanA ghUgharA ekasAthe jhaNajhaNI UThe evuM aTTahAsya karyuM. enA eka-eka pagalAmAM vijayano azrAvya huMkAra saMbhaLAvyo. sthira ane dRDha pagale teNe mayaNA pAse AvI enA khabhA para hAtha mUkIne kahyuM : "dIkarI! tArAM karmo tArA mATe koDhiyo pati laI AvyAM che.' "he tAta! mane A pati svIkArya che!' viNAnA jevA e madhura sUra hatA. bhaDabhaDatA agni para varasatA e ASADhI megha jevA zItala zabda hatA. rAjakuLa, rAja vaibhava... nagara ane manohara ughAno... A badhuM choDI, mayaNA uMbararANAnI sAthe nagaranA bAhyapradeza tarapha cAlI ke jyAM upekSAno 110 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #120
ghora aMdhakAra prasarelo hato. jyAM kIrtino prakAza na hato. jyAM sauMdaryanI chAyA na hatI ne jyAM mamatAnA paDachAyA paDatA na hatA. mahela AgaLa lokonI giradI thaI hatI. lokonA caherAo para koI judI ja rekhAo hatI. temanI prItipAtra banelI rAjakumArI tarapha temanI Asakti Aje jANe DhaLI paDI hoya tevuM lAgatuM hatuM. Aja mArA sauMdaryane, mArAM komaLa aMgone temanI najarathI loko pItA na hatA. mArA pratyenI dilacaspI, pyAra, AkAMkSA ane stabdhatA.. je harahaMmeza mane e najaromAM dekhAtI hatI e Aje jaDatI na hatI. keTalAkanA caherA para viSAda hato. keTalIka AMkhomAM AghAta hato. keTalIka nigAhomAM bhaDabhaDato dhikkAra hato. kema jANe temanI ArAdhya rAjakumArIne temaNe bahu moTI gunegAra mAnI lIdhI hatI. keTalIka mithyAtvI najaramAM luccAIbharelo AtmasaMtoSa hato. tema chatAM keTalIka AMkhomAM bhInA camakArAomAM mane anukaMpA paNa dekhAtI hatI. temanI mayaNA rAjakumArI koI anerA dRzyamAM temanI sAme khaDI hatI. rAjasabhAmAM dama bharavAnI jagA na hatI. nIce pherasa para jyAM jagA maLI tyAM loko AvIne besI gayA hatA. meM Aje AchA AsamAnI raMganI sAdAM dhoLAM phUlanI chApavALI sADI, ane sapheda coLI paherI hatI. zarIra para phUlono zaNagAra hato. alaMkAro meM utArI nAMkhyA hatA. huM rAjasabhAmAMthI mArA pati uMbararANA sAthe bahAra nIkaLI. amArA 700 sAthIdAroe ubararANAno jayajayakAra bolAvI dIdho. paNa tyAM ujjayinInA rAja kavie mArI pAse AvIne, mane ane uMbararANAne UbhA rAkhIne hajAro lokonI medanI vacce eka gIta lalakAryuM ke .: gIta : ulkApAta samuM jIvana te malayAcala mAnI mANyuM mayaNA benI! amaratane teM pIdhuM ne pAI jAyuM! eka vAra bhalabhalA bhUpane tharatharAvI daI tArI hAka! ane rAjasabhAmAM sabhAjanone mugdha karI gaI tArI hAka. siddhAMtonA spaSTa javAbo ApIne te gajavI hAka nAstikonA ne rAjAnA haiye sarjAvI gaI hoLI e hAka mayaNa 111 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #121
te sAhasa smita bhera karI pariNAmane jANyuM. mayaNA benI amaratane teM pIdhuM ne pAI jAyuM. hAra-jItanI no'tI kalpanA, karavuM'tuM madanuM khaMDana, sadA rahe jhaLahaLatI jyoti karavuM'tuM jinamatanuM maMDana, satata vahAvI jJAnanI dhArA karyuM te mithyAmata-bhaMDana hatuM bhavya ne divya eka camatkRtibhara uraspaMdana. tiraskAranA jalathI teM to zAMtithI nAhI jAyuM. - mayaNA benI amaratane teM pIdhuM ne pAI jANayuM. vaMToLAnA tAMDava sAthe hato niraMtara tAro pyAra hato zraddhAno kSatriyavaTano saptaraMgI zaNagAra hRdaye RSabha, manamAM munivara, hatI tArI balihAra bhaktinI zaktithI pAmI'tI tuM prabhuno pyAra. javAMmardInA jaMgamAM devI! teM raMge raMgAI jANyuM. mayaNA benI ! amaratane teM pIdhuM ne pAI jAyuM. teM haiyAmAM rudana bharIne, cahere nita pAthariyAM hAsa, aMdhakAramAM mArga zodhavA pahoMcI te sadgurunI pAsa. aNizuddha satIvrata adAthI sAcaviyI aNanama ullAsa jarUra paDI tyAM jhera pIdhAM teM paNa hatI haiye amRtanI Aza. teM saMsAranI zarazayyA para muktigIta gAI jANyuM. mayaNA benI amaratane teM pIdhuM ne pAI jAyuM. uMbararANAe mayaNAne joI. tenA caherA para brahmanuM ojasa hatuM. e eTalI ja suMdara hatI, eTalI ja custa. tenA custa zarIramAM kyAMya khoTI carabI jamA nahotI thaI. tenuM rezama jevuM badana, laMbagoLAkAra cahero, sIdhuM ghATIluM nAka, kaMDArelA tAnA jevA hoTha, saheja kaI jhAMyavALI AMkho, lAMbI sapramANa grIvA, pAtaLI kamarane ope evuM vakSa:sthaLa, kAcA rezamanA buTTA jevI cibuka ane gulAbI DhoLa pAtharyo hoya tevo nAjuka urapradeza. ubararANA mayaNAnA zarIra tarapha ajaba AsaktithI joI rahyo. badhuM ja addabhuta hatuM... paNa tenA manamAM prazna UThyo : "A strI zuM mArA mATe yogya che? huM enA mATe yogya che kharo? rAjAe potAnI AvI 112 muBI For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #122
apsarA jevI putrI, mArA jevA kuSTharogIne ApI... te rAjAno rAjakumArI pratyeno prakopa ja hovo joIe. pitAne putrI pratyeno tIvra roSa ja hovo joIe. paNa A rIte putrInA jIvanane pIMkhI nAMkhavAnA pitAne adhikAra nathI. hA, pitA rAjA che! sattAdhIza che! eTale e putrInA jIvana sAthe Avo kUra khela khelI zake... paNa huM enA dehane sparza nahIM karuM... enI kAyAne rogI nahIM karuM... ane mArA baMdhanamAM nahIM bAMdhuM! ene huM mukti ApIza. mArA sukha mATe enA sukhanuM balidAna nahIM lauM.... huM mAruM sukha jatuM karIza. Ameya A kuSThI jIvana sukhabhoga mATe hoya ja nahIM. ujjayinInI sarahada choDI ame amArA paDAve tarapha cAlI nIkaLyAM. e pahADIomAM UbhelAM vRkSo, e vRkSomAMthI caLAIne Avato laherAto pavana, caTTAnomAMthI vahetAM nAnakaDAM jharaNAM, ghAsa para jAmelAM pANInAM camakatAM phorAM, e saumAM je caitanya hatuM, nisarganI je aviSama ramaNIyatA hatI, tevuM ja kaMIka mane ubararANAmAM dekhAtuM hatuM. zI khabara ke pachI huM kharekhara svapnamAM hatI! garma tema paNa te divase e guphAnI bhekhaDanA ochAyAmAM mane koI akathya anubhUti thaI hatI. kadAca e ghaDI ja mArA premanI zarUAta haze. e anubhUtinA kAraNe ja mane ubararANo mAro puruSottama lAgyo haze? zI khabara... paNa e divase huM kaMIka pAmI hatI.... amArA paDAvamAM to bhavya utsavanuM vAtAvaraNa hatuM. sahunA mukha para anero AnaMda UbharAto hato. amArAM lagna mATenI taiyArIo thaI rahI hatI nagaramAMthI paNa mArA pratye sneha-sahAnubhUti dharAvatAM aneka strI-puruSo amArI pAchaLa-pAchaLa AvI rahyAM hatAM. bhale, e lokone mAro A nirNaya gamyo haze ke nahIM gamyo hoya, paraMtu temaNe mArI upekSA karI na hatI. mArI sakhI lalitA paNa AvI hatI. joke e sahunA mukha para udAsI chavAyelI hatI... aNagamo paNa haze... chatAM mArA pratyenI sahAnubhUti to hatI ja. amAro lagnotsava UjavAyo. huM vidhipUrvaka ubararANAnI patnI banI. uMbararANAnA sAtaso sahavAsIo AnaMdathI nAcI rahyA hatA. jyAre mArA pratyenA premathI.. snehathI ne sahAnubhUtithI AvelAM strI-puruSonI AMkhomAMthI AMsu TapakI rahyAM hatAM. meM IzArAthI e sahune kahyuM ke, "have 113 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #123
tame nagaramAM cAlyA jAo..." ghaNA loko cAlyA gayA. lalitA nA gaI. meM lalitAne kahyuM, "tuM cAlI jA ane mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarIne AzvAsana Apaje. ene kaheje ke enI putrI duHkhI nathI... ene pastAvo nathI.. e enA lIdhelA mArgamAM dRDha che." - lalitA punaH AvavAnuM kahIne cAlI gaI. huM uMbararANA sAthe amArI guphAmAM pravezI. guphAne puSpothI zaNagAravAmAM AvI hatI. svaccha Asano pAtharavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. emanA sAthIdAroe svaccha pANInuM mATaluM mUkeluM hatuM ane bIjI badhI ja sagavaDatAo goThavI hatI. huM guphAnA dvAre beThI hatI... mArA manamAM vicAronI vaNajhAra cAlI rahI hatI. huM agninI sAkSIe lagnanI pavitra gAMThe baMdhAI chuM. huM lagnabaddha banI... mArA jIvana pharate lakSmaNarekhA dorAI gaI. mAre have navA vAtAvaraNamAM navajIvana jIvI batAvavAnuM che. mAre ahIM mAruM nArItva, satItva satInuM jIvana jIvI batAvavAnuM che. game tevA jhaMjhAvAta sAme ahIM mAre TakI rahevAnuM che. have mAre mAtra mAro ja nahIM, A mArA kuSTharogI patino paNa vicAra karavAno che. huM Aje jIvananA eka khaDakanI bhekhaDa. para UbhI chuM. sAme ja ghUghavato dariyo che. navA pavananA susavATo che. jhaMjhAvAta che. vAvAjhoDA sAme Takkara jhIlIne mAre jhajhUmavAnuM che. varadhIra banIne jIvI batAvavAnuM che. mArA satItvanI rakSA karavAnI che. nArIjIvananAM ciraMtana mUlyonI sAcavaNI karavAnI che. vaLI, huM koI mahAna nArI nathI. sAmAnya rAjakanyA chuM ane have to eka gharabAra vinAnA, dharatI para bhaTakatA eka kuSTharogI puruSanI patnI mAtra chuM." huM kartavyavimukha nahIM banuM. zraddhAthI bharI bharI banI, sauprathama mArA patine kuSTharogathI mukta karavAnuM kAma mAre karavAnuM che. mArI prabhuprIti, mArI paramAtmabhakti, mArI guruzraddhA ne gurusevA... A badhI mahAna zaktio mane bhAre hiMmata bakSe, evI mArI manokAmanA che. ane chatAMya, samayanAM pelAM prabaLa paribaLo ya mane DarAvI rahyAM che. manamAM UThatA jhaMjhAvAta samA vicAronAM tophAno.... zuM mArI hayAtIne, mArA astitvane ukheDIne pheMkI deze? A joradAra pratikULa pravAhamAM kheMcAI-ghasaDAIne DUbI to nahIM jAuM? nA, nA, mane mArA bhagavAna 114 mayA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #124
mA RSabhadeva 52 pUrNa vizvAsa che! mane mArA gurudeva municandrasUri para ekAMtika zraddhA che... huM emanI zaraNAgata chuM... e have mArI ciMtA karaze... mAre mArI ciMtA nathI karavAnI! aMtaranA aMdhAre nAtha dIpa banIne Avo nAtha! dIpa banIne Avo nAtha! prANo che paravaza sau mArA Aza banIne Avo nAtha... dIpa banIne Avo nAtha! pragaTo deva! jIvana-aMdhAre karma-AtamanA baMdhiyAre kArAgAre muktinuM saMgIta banIne Avo nAtha... dIpa banIne Avo nAtha... hRdaya-vyathAnA pArAvAre vyAkuLatA kerI majhadhAre tAraka dhAraka nAvika thaIne Avo mArA nAtha mane ko sanAtha! aMtaranA aMdhAre nAtha dIpa banIne Avo nAtha! 115

Page #125
nA 17 kSiprA nadIno taTa koDhI-kAntAra rAtorAta utsavanA svargamAM badalAI gayo hato. lohI-paru jharatA zarIravALA sAtaso koDhI kezariyA vezamAM sAmaMta rAjA banI gayA hatA. premabharelA kaMThothI nagara-strIoe ane rAja kanyAoe vivAhanAM gIto gAyAM hatA. ane anekavidha maMgalAcAramAM potAnA harSAzru sIMcyAM hatAM. rAjavAdyo vAgyAM hatAM, zaMkhadhvani thayA hatA. araNyomAM pahelAM hajAro varSono aMdhakAra caitanya banI aMgaDAI laI rahyo hato. vanaphUlothI sajjita pariNayavedImAM, potAnI gaLI gayelI AMgaLIothI sauMdarya sAmrAjJI mayaNAkumArInuM pANigrahaNa karI, mahArAjA uMbarANA bhItaramAM ja kRtajJatAnAM AMsu vahAvI rahyA hatA. emanuM suvarNakhacita uttarIya vastra bhIMjAI rahyuM hatuM. vividha sugaMdhita aMgarAgane bhedIne paNa emanI dehadurgadha bahAra phUTI paDI hatI. jhUkelI AMkhe mayaNAe zrIpAlane jayamAlA paherAvIne, mayaNA emanAM caraNomAM paDI gaI. zrIpAlanAM caraNonI sAthe hRdaya paNa namrIbhUta banI gayuM. araNya-zikhara para pratipadAno pAMDura kSayI caMdramA cAlato cAlato aTakI gayo. guphA-dvAranA AmratoraNanI nIce, uMbararANA ane mayaNA keTaloka samaya niHstabdha UbhAM rahyAM... e be sivAya trIjuM koI na rahyuM tyAre ubararANAe nIravatAno bhaMga karyo : bhagavatI !' parama anukaMpAthI bharyAbharyA be nayana ubararANAnA vidUta caherA para vyApta thayAM. mArA deva! mArA kAmadeva!' nahIM nahIM, kAmadeva nahIM, koDhI kaha, devI..." mArI abhIpsAno bhaMga na karo, mArA devatA! mArA svapnane toDo nahIM!" mayaNAno gaMbhIra dhvani guphAmAM phelAyo. 113 mANasA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #126
zuM tuM mArA dehane joI nathI rahI? tAre jovAyogya mAro cahero nathI, devI!" A tamAro asalI cahero nathI, nAtha! nahIM, tame tamAro cahero joI nathI zakatA. mArI AMkhothI eka vAra tame tamane juo..." 'devI, tame game te kaho, huM tamArA mATe yogya nathI... mArA saMparkathI tamAro svarNasamAna deha kadarUpo banI jaze. te rUpe raMbhA jevI che, mArA paricayathI tAruM rUpa naSTa pAmaze. mATe manamAM jarAya zarama rAkhyA vinA tuM tArI mAtA pAse jA ane bIjA devakumAra jevA rAjakumAra sAthe lagna karI rAjyalakSmIne bhogava! devI viSayasukho bhogava. mArA baMdhanathI tamane mukta karuM chuM.' tyAM mayaNA bolI - eha vacana kema bolIe re lo, INe vacane jIva jAya re vAlesara, jIva-jIvana tume vAlA re lo, avara na nAma khamAya re, vAlesara, pazcima ravinavi ugame re lo, jaladhi na lope sIma re, satI avara icche nahIM re lo... jo jIve to sIma re, vAlesara. udayAcala upara caDhyo re lo, mAnuM ravi parabhAva re vAlesara, mayaNA mukha jovA bhaNI re lo, zIla acala avadAta re, vAlesara. cakravAka duHkha cUrato re lola, karato kamala vikAsa re vAlesara, jagalocana jana ugiyo re lo, pasaryo puharI prakAza re, vAlesara. (uMbararANAne mayaNA kahe che) he vahAlezvara! tame AvAM vacana kema bolo cho? AvAM vacano sAMbhaLatAM to mAro jIva jAya. tame mArA jIvananA sAthI cho, vahAlA sAthI cho. eTale tamArA sivAya bIjAnuM nAma paNa jIvanasAthI tarIke huM sahana karI zakuM nahIM. he nAtha! jema sUrya pazcima dizAmAM Ugato nathI ane samudra potAnI maryAdA mUkato nathI, tema satI strI jyAM sudhI jIve tyAM sudhI paraNelA pati sivAya bIjA koI puruSane icche nahIM. AvI avicala ne ujjavala zIlavALI mayaNAsuMdarInA mukhane jovA ja jANe. sUrya prabhAta samaye udayAcala parvata para caDhyo hoya, tema huM (kavi) mAnuM chuM! A pramANe cakravAka ne cakravAkInA virahano nAza karanAra sUrya-vikAsI mayamA 117. For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #127
kamaLone vikasAvato ane jagatanA jIvone cakSu samAna A sUrya udaya pAmyo tyAre pRthvI para prakAza phelAyo. meM kahyuM : "he nAtha, A tamAro asalI cahero nathI. tame svayaM potAne joI nathI zakatA. mArI AMkhothI eka vAra tame tamane juo, prabhu!" ane bhaktibharapUra nayanothI mayaNAe dUrathI ja potAnA svAmIne avikalapaNe potAnA AMcalamAM bAMdhI lIdhA! ane potAnA vallabhano hAtha pakaDI te guphAnA aMdhakAramAM pravezI gaI. zrIpAlanA zarIra paranA vraNo para dhIre dhIre mayaNA puSponI kaLIothI sahelAvavA lAgI. guphAmAM mAtra be jaNAM hatAM. mayaNA, tame koNa cho? tame mArI bhItara evI rIte AvI gayAM cho ke jANe tamArA sivAya ahIM bIjuM koI nathI! mAro ja AtmA mane lArI rahyo che.... nahitara bIjuM koI ahIM zA mATe Ave? yAtanAono A deza mAnavothI ghaNo dUra che!" "sAcuM kaho cho svAmI, eka huM ja chuM ahIM, bIjuM koI nathI. svAmI! mArA potAnA ja svarUpane maLavA huM AvI che ane e pAmIne huM bharAI gaI chuM! janamajanamanA mArA A badhA ghA, tamArA A ghAothI bharAI gayA che. huM pUrNakAma thaI! huM paripUrita thaI!' mayaNA! tamArI hathelIonuM caMdana-kapUra sahana nathI thatuM. te chatAM atalamAM evuM koI agAdha sukha che... nirAkula che. tene mArI bhItara ja badhuM pAmI gayo chuM.... bahAramAM pAmavAnuM kaMI bAkI rahetuM nathI. mayaNA! kharekhara te ananyA cho! tArA sivAya bIjuM koI nathI.." kaMIka samaya badhuM mauna patharAyuM. pAchI madhura kaMThathI cuppI bhaMga thaI. pachI saMkoca zAne, mArA nAtha?" "mArI pAse vakSa nathI, bAMho nathI... deha ja nathI... devI!' mArI bAMho che, mAruM vakSa che. mAruM zarIra che... have e parAyuM nathI, deva! ApanuM ja che... ApanuM ja raheze...! nAtha! mArA ahaMne toDo ane cAho to sohaM banAvI lo! mArA vazamAM kaMI ja nathI, ba! to cUpa raho ane mane saho!" 118 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #128
eka athAka monamAM tadAkAra thavAno saMgharSa zarU thayo. asahya che A sukha! kuSTharogI A kevI rIte sahe? koDha to mArA aMcalamAM laI lIdho che! bhrama tyajIne mArI najIka Avo deva! mArA parama puruSa! huM tamane tamAruM svarUpa batAvuM.' e rAte vadhAre pavana na hato, dhULanI AMdhI bahu jaladI UDI gaI hatI. varasAda pachI tArA nIkaLI AvyA hatA, bilakula sApha ane dhovAyelA! AMdhI to have kyAMya dekhAtI na hatI. zImaLAnuM vRkSa sIdhuM UbhuM hatuM. tenI DALIo pANImAM bhIMjAyelI cAMdInI jhAlaro jevI camakatI hatI. huM uMbarANAne laI guphAnI bahAra AvI hatI. dhULa ane AMdhI pachI tArA nIkaLI AvyA hatA. e eTalA caLakatA hatA ke jANe havAmAM sonerI jevo cUro kharI rahyo hato. na prakAza, na aMdhakAra! vaccenI koI cIja! aMdhArAne juo to e rozanI jevo banI jato ane ajavALAne juo to aMdhakAra jevo! kyAreka koI pakSI vRkSa parathI UDIne guphAnA dvArA para phaDaphaDatuM lAgatuM. lokonA avAjo enI pAMkho nIce dabAI jatA. e havAmAM UDatuM to vAtonA TukaDA pharIthI joDAI jatA. jANe kazuM ja banyuM na hoya... mAtra havAmAM eka dhrujArI kAMpatI rahetI. meM uMbarANAne kahyuM : "juo, AkAzamAM candra nIkaLI Avyo che." bahu nAno.. eka kApelA sapheda nakha jevo!" prabhAta thayuM hatuM. kSiprAno taTa sAtaso mANasonA kolAhalathI bolakaNo banI gayo hato. sahu potapotAnA nityakarmamAM pravRtta thayA hatA. huM paNa uMbarANAne laI kSiprAnA taTa para javAnI taiyArI karatI hatI, tyAM lalitA AvI pahoMcI. ame nadInA taTa para gayAM. tyAM meM ane lalitAe uMbararANAnA ghA sApha karI, tenA para davA lagAvI pATA bAMdhyA. bIjA paNa najIkamAM rahelA rogI puruSonA ghA sApha karIne davA lagADI, pATA-piMDI karI. lalitA amArA mATe dUdha ane nAsto laI AvI hatI. ame AsapAsanA paricita be-cAra bhAIone bolAvIne dugdhapAna karyuM ane nAsto karyo. nAsto karyA pachI lalitAe mayaNAne kahyuM : "devI! nagaranuM mahA 119 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #129
vAtAvaraNa ghaNuM niMdApracura ane Akrozabhara raheluM che. emAMya zaivapaMthIo to khUba rAjI thaIne khullaMkhullA bole che ke : "juo jaina dharmano prabhAva mayaNA jaina dharmane prANathI paNa adhika mAne che. jinamaMdire jAya che, jaina sAdhuo pAse jAya che... e mayaNAne kevo pati maLyo? kuSTharogI! jenA hAthapaganI AMgaLIo kharI paDelI che. jenuM zarIra koDharogathI ati grarata che... jaina dharmano A prabhAva? mayaNA mana-vacana-kAyAthI.. tana-mana-dhanathI jaina dharmanI ArAdhanA kare che... e ArAdhanAnuM A phaLa ene maLyuM? AnA karatAM to zaiva dharma keTalo mahAna? ke rAjakumArI surasuMdarIne manapasaMda rAjakumAra maLyo.' jaina dharma karatAM zaiva dharma mahAna che!" A vAta rAjamahelamAM paNa zarU thaI che ane nagaramAM pracalita thaI che. jaina dharma evo camatkAra nathI karI zakato ke kuSTharogI evA ubararANAno kuSTharoga miTAvI zake! mayaNAne paNa A vAta khUMcI gaI. game te upAyathI uMbararANAno kuSTharoga maTavo joIe! e mATe huM bhagavAna RSabhadevanA maMdiramAM jaIza. pachI gurudeva municandra pAse jaIza, kuSTharoga to maTavo ja joIe! jainetaro - zaivo je rIte niMdA karI rahyA hatA te vAta asahya hatI. mayaNAe lalitAne kahyuM : lalitA, koI paNa upAye ubararANAno roga dUra thavo ja joIe.' na karIza kakaLATa manavA, karIza nahIM kakaLATa! pakaDI leje vATa.. samatAnI vATe cAlIne pahoMcavuM zivaghATa bhale ne garje pralaya kaDAkA, pAmavI che sukhazAta manavA karIza nahIM kakaLATa, pakaDI leje vATa. kadama kadame kAMTA lAkho, paDaze catto pATa pRthvI bane bhale pIDAgRha, khAvI cho pachaDATa manavA! karIza nahIM kakaLATa... pakaDI leje vATa.. anila bane aMgAra bhale ne gALono ghoMghATa 120 mayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #130
jinavaranuM dhara dhyAna hRdayamAM sukha Ave pUrapATa manavA! karIza nahIM kakaLATa... pakaDI leje vATa... lalitAnA mananuM to samAdhAna thayuM, paraMtu nagaramAM core ne cauTe jinadharmanI niMdA thaI rahI che. sAthe sAthe devI, tamArI paNa niMdA thaI rahI che. tamAre tamArA pitAjInI vAta svIkArI laIne 'pitRvo mavanI saMskRti jALavavI joItI hatI. eka rAja kumArI jo pitAnA Adezane avagaNe to enI asara sAmAnya prajAjano para paDe ja. chatAM DAhyA mANaso ApanI siddhAMtaniSThAnI prazaMsA kare che. eka siddhAMta khAtara tame je sukha-bhogano tyAga karyo che, enI prazaMsA paNa nagaramAM Thera Thera thaI rahI che. ApanI mAtA devI rUpasuMdarI ane ApanA adhyApaka subuddhi ApanA siddhAMtane sArI rIte samajAvI rahyAM che. mayaNA 121 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #131
nA 18 hajI Aje suvrata-udyAnamAM bhagavAna RSabhadevano prAsAda hajAronI saMkhyAmAM sarvasAdhAraNa strI-puruSa ane bALakothI khIcokhIca bharAyelo che ane emAM evI utsuka nistabdhatA che ke jo soya paDe to paNa saMbhaLAya. maMdiranA sabhAmaMDapamAM eka UMcA Asana para tejomAna devI mayaNA potAnA pati ubarANA sAthe beThI che. bAlasUryanI lAla kAntinA maMDalanI pavitra rozanI mayaNAnI kAyA para patharAyelI che. mayaNA mRgazAvaka jevI nirdoSa che ane mRgendra jevI pracaMDa-pratApI che. bhAratanA, vizeSa karIne mAlavadezanA cunaMdA paMDito tyAM birAjamAna che. hajAro AMkho, vidyutaprabhA samAna mayaNA upara lAgelI che ane tyAM acAnaka gaMbhIra zaMkhanAda suNAI sAMbhaLAyo. kevalyanI vizuddha sauMdaryaprabhAthI jemano deha dedIpyamAna che; karoDo sUrya jemanAmAM ekasAthe udyodita che; nArakonI akathya vedanAo; saMgharSa ane vedanAo jemane hastAmalakavatuM niraMtara saMvedita che, triloka ane trikAlanA anaMta pariNamana jemanI AtmaprabhAmAM anusamayataraMgita che - e pUrNakAma ane pUrNasuMdara ahit RSabhadevanA caraNomAM mayaNAe mana-vacana-kAyAthI praNAma karyA. teNe kahyuM : mArI stavanA pratipala nava-nUtana hoya che. vastasauMdarya pratikSaNa pariNamanazIla hoya che. emAM paLepaLe navA-navA bhAva ane navAM navAM rUpe pragaTa thAya che. bhagavAna RSabhadeva anaMta suMdara che. agAdha ane asIma che emanuM rUpa ane lAva! keTalAka lokomAM ja e varNana pUruM thaI jatuM nathI. e tribhuvanamohinI mA che! pratikSaNa mArI AMkho sAme nita navI banIne pragaTa thAya che. hamaNAM ja ahIM, A paLe sattAnA anaMta samudramAMthI aMgaDAI letI, eka apUrva lAvaNyaprabhA sAthe e pratimA pragaTa thAya che! 122 apaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #132
aho! zabdonA ekadezIya kathanamAM, A karuNAmAtAnA anaMta ramaNIyarUpanuM varNana kevI rIte karI zakAya? enI rUpavibhA anaikAntinI che. vividha bhAva, vividha saMvedana, vividha bhaMgimAo, saMbaMdho ane saMdarbhomAM e ekasAthe abhivyakta thaI rahI che. kALathI atIta te potAnA samayanI eka vAranI ramaNI che, mA che, dhAtrI che, vidhAtrI che, vadhu che, sarvAganA che, urvazI che, tilottamAM che ane sarvasaMvAriNI paNa che... e zuM nathI? sArAMza e che ke e pUMjIbhUta rUpavigraha che. je manuSyanI jevI cAhanA che, jevA bhAva che, ene anurUpa enI cetanA pragaTa thAya che. ahA! kevI parama anugrahavatI, anukaMpAvatI bhagavatI che A pratimA bhagavAna RSabhadevanI! jagadIzvaranI! paramezvaranI! huM anubhava karuM chuM ke enI parama kRpA A kSaNe amRtanA samudranI jema cAre bAjuthI UchaLIUchaLIne mane navaDAvI rahI che. potAnA nirAvaraNa zuddha sparzanA jaLathI e mArA A priyatama rANAnA aNu-aNune abhisiMcita karatI rahI che. mArI ane mArA A priyatamanI samasta vAsanA ane cetanA enI karuNA ane ramaNIyatAnA saMga tadAkAra thaIne, enI anuttara sauMdaryamUrtinI sAthe AliMgita thaI gaI che. he prabho! bAre svargonA kamalavanonA savarNima parimalaparAga je tamArA dehamAM rUpAyamAna thayo che ane bhagavaMta! tamAma apsarAo ane devAMganAonI sArabhUta rUpamAdhurI ApanAM aMgAMgothI jharI rahI che. tame kalpalatAo jevI lacIlI, tavaMgI, manacAhI, manamAyI ane sarvakAmapUraNa zaktizALI cho. tamArA mukhamaMDaLanI saumya savarNa AbhAmAM, badhA sUryo, badhA candramAM, badhA graha-nakSatronI jyoti, samarasa, saMvAdI, samaMjasa banIne vyApta che. tamArA bhU-madhya tilakamAM, nikhilanA ekIbhUta AkarSaNanuM kendra banIne raheluM che. tamArI bhramarInAM kheMcAyelAM dhanuSya, amArA prANonAM tIranI jema kheMcIne vividha kAmya vastuone vIMdhe che. tamArI AMkhonA sarvasvahArI kaTAkSa, amArA mana-madananA marmone bhede che. daSTinA AghAtathI amArI vAsanA TukaDeTukaDA thaI jAya che. sarva deza-kALanA sahastradala kamalonA mArdava, makaranda ane saurabhathI tamArA hoTha saMmudita rahe che. A hoThonA madhaNA 123 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #133
vAtAvaraNamAM niraMtara prakRti sAthenuM cuMbana pravAhita rahe che. tamArI cibukanI goLAImAMthI jANe jaMbudvIpa pRthvI para utarI Avyo che. tamArI kaMbugrIvAnI rekhAomAM jANe keTalA janmonI mamatA UbharAI rahI che! lokamadhyamAM trasa-nADInA samAna che tamAro grIvAno pradeza. enA rekhApaTalomAM cAreya nikAyanA rAzita jIva mamatAkula thaI zaraNa zodhe che! he bhagavan! A saMsAra-ApanA klezathI jIvo saMtrasta che. e jIvone mATe ApanA caraNonI chAyA chatra bane che. he nAtha, jema sUrya paropakAra mATe prakAze che tema Apa paNa lokahitArthe A pRthvI para vicaraNa karo cho. he jinezvara! je koI jIva ApanAM darzana kare che teo dhanya banI jAya che ane jeo ApanAM darzana nathI pAmatA teo bhale svargavAsI hoya, to paNa adhanya che. tribhuvanapati! jeonA hRdayacaityamAM Apa ja eka adhidevatArUpe birAjamAna cho, te bhAviko zreSThAtizreSTha che. he jinezvara? he marudevAnaMdana, huM Apane prArthanA karuM chuM ke Apa kyAreya mAruM hRdayasiMhAsana khAlI karazo nahIM. parama paramezvara bhagavAna RSabhadeva! mohano vAruNI samudra tame tarI gayA ane tethI ja tamArA AtmataTa para kaivalyasUrya avatIrNa thayo hato! he anantakoTi brahmAMDonI janetA ane abhaya-zaraNadAtrI mAtA! tamArAM zrIcaraNonA padhasaMcArathI pratipala nitya-nUtana sRSTionI uSAo phUTatI rahe che. bhavAraNyamAM jIvI rahelI jIva rAzi ne jIva-yonine tamArA pAdasparzathI ajJAta, abUjha amaratvanuM AzvAsana maLatuM rahe che. o paramAtmA! o parama mA! AtmaramaNI mA... ApanI ziSyA mayaNAne ApanI zrIkamalagodamAM utsagita karo! carama AliMgana karo... parama bhaktinuM sukha pradAna karo! o parama AtmA! o bhagavad Sabhadeva! sahasA mayaNA nirvApha thaI gaI. parAvAku thaI gaI. rasasamAdhimAM aMtaralIna thaI gaI. eka virATa ane akhaMDa niHstabdhatA jANe diganto sudhI vyApta thaI gaI. vizvanI badhI gatividhi jANe ekAeka virAma pAmI gaI. apane ApamAM vizuddha advaita mahAsattAnA sivAya tyAM jANe kazuM ja zeSa na rahyuM. ArAdhaka ane ArAdhdha, vaktA ane zrotA, kavi ane bhAvaka... eka abheda nIravatAmAM tadAkAra banI gayAM. hajAro AMkhoe ekAgra apalaka dRSTithI joyuM : vacce rahelA UMcA 124 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #134
Asana para eka saMbhrAnta strI, nizcala ane nirvikAra dazAmAM lIna che. enI pAseno puruSa ruNa che paNa nirmaLa che. divya dRSTimAM e niratizaya kAmadeva che! ujjayinInAM aneka seMkaDo strI-puruSa tyAM stabdha banIne beThA che. emane mayaNAnI prabhuzaktino, prabhubhaktino prabhAva pratyakSa jovo che.' mayaNAe kezara, caMdana, puSpa ane kapUra Adi uttama dravyothI prabhunI pUjA karI. sugaMdhI puSpothI bharapUra hAra teNe prabhunA kaMThe paherAvyo. tyAra pachI caityavaMdana karyuM. bhAvanA bhAvI. kAyotsargadhyAna karyuM.... ane tyAM mayaNAe paramAtmAnI stavanA zarU karI : zaraNa eka tamAruM sAcuM jinavara! bIjuM badhuM che kAcuM.. zaraNa eka tamAruM sAcuM... , vAcALa kare che bhakti jinavarI stavanA karavI che palabhara. he Adi tIrthakara jaganA gAvAM che gIta Aje manabhara. saMsAra-duHkhathI pIDita loko Ave che zaraNe doDI animeSa nayane nirakhI tamane pAme che zAMti thoDI... jeo sAMbhaLe ApanAM vacano karmavana bALI jAtAM nAmamaMtra tamAro japatA sarva siddhi te pAtA... tama bhaktinuM bakhtara je pahere, vaja paNa tene na vadhe, trizULa paNa chede na tene jAya muktimAM te sIdhe... zaraNa eka tamAruM sAcuM jinavara! bIjuM badhuM che kAcuM.. mANo 125 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #135
mayaNA ane ubararANA! prabhumAM tanmaya banyAM... badhuM ja bhUlIne paramAtmAmAM lIna banyAM... hRdayamAM apUrva AhlAda pragaTyo! te ja vakhate prabhunA kaMThethI puSpamALA nIkaLI ane uMbara2ANA pAse AvI. uMbararANAe be hAthe e mALA grahaNa karI potAnA kaMThamAM Aropita karI. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir bIjI ja paLe, bhagavaMtanA hAthamAM raheluM bIjorAnuM phaLa UDIne uMbarANAnA hAthamAM AvyuM! uMbara2ANAe harSathI te grahaNa karyuM. A vakhate mayaNA kAyotsargadhyAnamAM hatI. teNe dhyAna pUrNa karyuM... te nAcI UThI! prabhuno A parama prasAda! teNe tyAM ja uMbararaNAnA kAnamAM kahyuM : 'mArA deva! A prabhukRpA thaI. tamAro kuSTharoga have gayo samajo! paramAtmAnI kRpAthI zuM nathI thatuM? viSa amRta bane che. agni jaLa bane che! zastra saraLa daMDa banI jAya che ne sarpa doraDuM banI jAya che!' 127 mATe he mArA kAmadeva! paramAtmAnI khUba bhakti karo. emanI pUjA karajo. A ApaNane zubhano saMketa maLyo che. ujjvala bhaviSyano nirdeza maLyo che. paramAtmaanugrahanI eka jhalaka maLI che. have ahIMthI ApaNe gurudeva pAse javAnuM che. For Private And Personal Use Only mA

Page #136
sika 19 RSabhaprAsAdanI pAse ja pauSadhazALA AvelI hatI. ane e pauSadhazALAmAM AcAryazrI municandrasUri birAjamAna hatA. ame - huM ane uMbarANA dhIre pagale pauSadhazALAmAM pravezyAM. pauSadhazALAmAM gurudevano dharmopadeza cAlI rahyo hato. Akho khaMDa zrotAothI bharAI gayo hato. ame paNa saunI pAchaLa cUpacApa besI gayA ane dharmopadeza sAMbhaLavA lAgyAM. viSaya cAlato hato "manuSyabhavanI durlabhatA'no A manuSyajIvanamAM pramAdano tyAga karI, AtmabhAvamAM jAgrata banI dharma-puruSArtha karI levo joIe. AtmakalyANa sAdhavAnI badhI ja sAmagrI manuSyane maLI che, te sAmagrIno sadupayoga karI levo joIe. paraMtu sukhano tIvra rAgI jIvAtmA sukhanA samayano ke sukhanI jAtano vicAra nathI karI zakato. je sukhanI ene tIvra bhUkha lAge che te sukha bhale kSaNika hoya, te bhogavI le che. te sukha halakI jAtanuM hoya to paNa te bhogavI le che. sukhanI tIvra bhUkha viSayasukhonI kSaNikatAno vicAra nathI karavA detI. paraMtu te chatAM, tamane atyaMta priya ane zreSThamAM zreSTha bhojana ApavAmAM AvyuM che. tame atyaMta kSudhAtura paNa cho, bhojanano thALa sAme che; zreSTha mIThAIo, priya vyaMjano, svAdiSTa pharasANa, madhura zarabata-badhuM sAme che; pIrasanAra premathI ane AgrahathI bhojana pIrase che, tame khAvAnI taiyArI karo cho tyAM tamAro vizvAsapAtra ane nikaTano mitra doDato, hAMphato tamArI pAse Ave che ane tamane koLiyo moMmAM nahIM mUkavAno izAro karI, tamane bahAra bolAve che ne kAnamAM kahe che : "A bhojanano eka kaNa moDhAmAM na nAMkhIza. dago thayo che. A bhojanamAM jhera bheLavI devAmAM AvyuM che', ATaluM kahIne te jhaDapathI cAlyo jAya che. kaho, tame zuM karazo? e priya, svAdiSTa ane zreSTha bhojana tame karazo? e bhojana para tamAro rAga Takaze? nA, have e bhojanamAM tamane jhera mayamA 127 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #137
ja dekhAvAnuM! cAmaDAnI A AMkhothI nahIM, mananI AMkhothI jhera dekhAze. bhAjananA padArthamAM ekameka thaIne bhaLI gayelA jherane carmacakSu joI zakatI nathI. mananI AMkho, jJAnanI AMkho joI zake che. e bhojya padArthamAM motanAM darzana thAya che. zarIra dhrujI UThe che. zarIre pasIne thaI Ave che, AMkhomAM bhaya tarI Ave che. tame eka kSaNano ya vilaMba karyA vinA e bhojanano tyAga karI devAnA. mane jhera dekhAtuM nathI, A to mArAM svajano che, teo dago kare nahIM, ATalI bahumUlya sAmagrI pheMkI kema devAya? A to koIe jheranI khoTI zaMkA karI haze...' AvA tarka-vitarka tame karo kharA? "AmAM jhera che ke kema?' e jANavA thoDuM khAvAno prayoga karo kharA? jarAya nahIM. e padArthone sparza paNa na karo! vaiSayika sukho paNa jharamizrita bhojana jevAM che. emAMya strI-puruSanuM saMbhogasukha to halAhala jhera sAthe ghoLAyeluM sukha che. mAno ke koI rUpasuMdarI pratye tamArA manamAM anurAga janmyo. e rUpasuMdarIne paNa tamArA pratye anurAga janme, ema tame iccho cho. ene anurAgI banAvavA tame aneka prayatno karo cho. kyAreka koI udyAnanA latAmaMDapamAM e maLI gaI ke kAzmIranI yAtrAmAM, zrInagaranI koI ramaNIya hoTalamAM maLI gaI, tame ene manAvI levA AdarapUrvaka enI khuzAmata karavA mAMDI, eno paDyo bola upADI levA tatpara banyA. enuM ekAduM mIThuM smita, enA ekAda bolano Tahuko meLavavA tame talapApaDa banyA ane cAra-pAMca divasanI e "sevAbhaktinA aMte e priyatamAe tamane hasIne bolAvyA. vibhinna hAvabhAva karIne tamArA dilane bahelAvavA mAMDyuM. enI suMdaratAmAM tame abhivRddhi joI, tamAro snehasAgara UchaLavA mAMDyo. mohanAM mojAM AkAzamAM UchaLavA lAgyAM. ' have darzana ane zravaNa pachI, rUpasuMdarInA sparzanI vAsanA bhabhUkI UThI. tame dIna banIne, bhikhArI banIne, enA dehasukhanI yAcanA karI. eNe potAnAM tana-mana tamane samarpita karavAnI tatparatA batAvI, tame mohanA unmAdamAM nAcI UThyA ane saMbhogasukha mANavA Atura banI gayA. te vakhate tamArA zayanakhaMDanA bAraNe TakorA paDyA. "koI AvyuM!" ema samajIne tame dvAra kholyuM. sAme zveta vastromAM sajja, hAthamAM daMDa ane 128 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #138
pAtra... AMkhomAM karuNA ane vANImAM mAdhurya... evA sAdhupuruSane UbhelA joyA. temaNe temane kahyuM : vatsa, huM kaMI levA nathI Avyo, kaMIka kahevA Avyo chuM!" tame kahyuM : "munivara, Apane je kahevuM hoya te kaho." munivare kahyuM : "vatsa, viSayasukho halAhala jherathI paNa vadhu khataranAka che. jhera to eka mRtyu Ape che. A vaiSayika sukho seMkaDo jIvanone duHkhamaya banAvaze. seMkaDo motane kamota banAvaze. mATe pAcho vaLa mArA priya bALa! zAMta thA, svastha thA. je vaiSayika sukha bhogavavA tuM tatpara thayo che teno tyAga kara." ATaluM kahIne "dharmalAbhano AzIrvAda ApIne e sAdhu cAlyA gayA. have tame zuM karazo? tamane e vaiSayika sukhamAM halAhala jheranAM darzana thaze? tamArI uddIpta kAmavAsanAmAM tAlapUTa viSanAM darzana thaze? hA, mananI AMkho khUlI gaI hoya to ja e darzana thAya. e darzana thayA pachI gAtro zithila thaI jAya. zarIre parasevo vaLI jAya, AMkho bhayathI pahoLI thaI jAya. jJAnI puruSoe khUba rAgathI sevelA-bhogavelA viSayone seMkaDo, hajAro jIvanonI paraMparAmAM duHkhonuM sAtatya ApanArA batAvyA che. jo e viSayonuM sevana maMda rAgathI, alpa rAgathI thAya to e e viSayo eTalA badhA bhISaNa duHkhadAyI nathI banatA ane jo e viSayonuM sevana sarvathA tyajI devAmAM Ave to e viSayo eka kSaNanuM paNa duHkha ApI zakatA nathI. pAMca indriyonA je je viSayo sAthe ApaNA rAgano saMbaMdha thAya che, je je viSayo sAthe hRdaya AsaktithI baMdhAya che, te te viSayo ApaNA AtmAnuM ahita karanArA bane che, arthAt ApaNI rAgadazA ane Asakti ja ApaNuM adha:patana kare che. jyAM sudhI vaiSayika sukhono ApaNe sarvathA tyAga na karI zakIe tyAM sudhI e viSayonuM sevana tIvra rAgathI na karIe. rAgamAM tIvratAne na bhaLavA daIe. "viSayasaMbhogamAM halAhala jheranuM darzana karanArI divyadRSTi khUlI gayA pachI rAgamAM tIvratA AvI zakatI nathI. "viSayasaMbhoga'nI bhUkha sahana thatI nathI ane e viSayasevana nAchUTake kare che, tyAre rAga hoya, paraMtu e rAgamAM tIvratA na hoI zake. ayaNa 129 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #139
"samyagdaSTi jIvAtmA viSayopabhoga kare, chatAM e pApakarmono baMdha alpa pramANamAM kare che.' AvuM pratipAdana sarvajJanA zAstro kare che, enuM hArda A ja che. jJAnadaSTi kaho, divyadRSTi kaho, yogadaSTi kaho ke samyagdaSTi kaho, e dRSTi viSayarAgamAM tIvratA bhaLavA detI nathI. SamAM tIvratA bhaLavA detI nathI. e jJAnadRSTi A che - viSayo viSa karatAM ya vadhu bhayaMkara che. viSa (jhera) eka jIvana naSTa kare che, viSayo aneka bhava aneka jIvana barabAda kare che. upadeza detAM detAM AcAryadeve sahuthI pAchaLa beThelI mayaNAsuMdarIne joI. enI pAse beThelA eka tejasvI paNa ruNa puruSane beThelo joyo. dezanA pUrNa karI. gurudeve mayaNAne bolAvI. 'kumArI! Aje kema ekalI AvI? tuM to hamezAM rAjaparivAra sAthe hAthI, ghoDA ne pAlakhImAM AvatI hatI. tArI sAthe sainiko ane prabuddha puruSo AvatA hatA..' 'gurudeva! rAjasabhAmAM pitAjI sAthe vAda-vivAda thayo... temano ahaMkAra ogALavA ane sarvajJasiddhAMtane pALavA mATe meM A kuSTharogI puruSa sAthe lagna karyo che. gurudeva! nagaramAM zaiva loko mArI to niMdA kare ja che, jaina dharmanI paNa niMdA kare che. bole che loko : "juo, mANAe jaina dharmano siddhAMta pakaDI rAkhyo to ene kuSTharogI pati maLyo! jyAre surasuMdarIne kevo sohAmaNo rAjakumAra maLyo! kAraNa ke e zaivamatane mAnanArI rAja kumArI hatI... jinamatamAM evI koI zakti nathI... evo koI camatkAra nathI ke je kuSTharogIne kAmadeva jevo suMdara kumAra banAvI de!' he zubhadA mayaNA rANI adIna rahIne karyA karaje gItonI rasalahANI he zubhadA mayaNArANI! Abha tUTe ne dharaNI dhruje, bane pavana tophAnI, jhaMjhAnA tAMDava para caDhaje tyajavI duniyA phAnI he zubhadA mayaNArANI! 130 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #140
samaNA Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir takhtanazIno kerI tumAkhI mAMhI kaiMka taNANI tuM gAMDI banI evuM gAje bhale rahe nA zANI he zubhadA mayaNArANI. tuM jinamatanuM karaje pAlana dRDha banI mastAnI karmonA baMdhodayanI vArtA hRdayahRdayamAM samANI he zubhadA mayaNArANI. tuM ArAdhya jinavANI mIThI, tuM muktinI eMdhANI AtamadhyAnanI karatI raheje nitanita e ja kahAnI he zubhadA mayaNArANI! gurudeva! mAruM mana eka ja vAtathI valovAya che. nagarajano jaina dharmanI niMdA karI rahyA che. jaina dharmanA ArAdhakonI nirAdhAratA para anukaMpA varasAvI rahyA che... prabho! mane kuSTharogI pati maLyo, enuM mane jarA ya du:kha nathI. mArA pitAe mArA mATe je varanI pasaMdagI karI te meM saharSa svIkArI che. mane vaiSayika sukhanuM evuM koI AkarSaNa paNa nathI. vaLI mAruM bhAgya kevuM ujjvaLa che ke emane, uMbararANAne paNa vaiyika sukhanI koI tIvra icchA nathI. temanuM zarIra nIrogI na bane tyAM sudhI mane sparza karavAnI paNa teo nA pADe che. gurudeva! temanI udAratA to kevI adbhuta che... teo mane lagnanA baMdhanamAMthI sahajabhAve mukta karI, huM koI bIjA rAjakumAra sAthe lagna karI vaiyika sukha bhogavuM - tevo Agraha kare che... paraMtu mArI dRDha zraddhA che ke teono kuSTharoga ApanI ja kRpAthI dUra thaze. ane Ape ja gurudeve, jinazAsananI niMdA na thAya, jinazAsananI prazaMsA thAya, enI kIrti vadhe, eno yaza vadhe, tevo upAya karavo paDaze. gurudeva! Apa jinamArganA jJAtA cho. mokSamArganA jJAtA cho. Apa utsargamArga jANo cho, Apa apavAdamArga jANo cho... he paramaguru! Apa mahAna zaktionA dhAraka cho. hA, Apa ApanA prabhAvane vistAravA mATe ApanI yogazaktiono upayoga na karo, te ucita che; ke amArA jevA sAmAnya strI-puruSonA auSadhiprayogo na karo, e ApanI maryAdAo che. Apa koI sAvadya-pApayukta prayoga na karo, e paNa eTaluM ja sAcuM che. paNa prasaMga AvI Ubho che eka rAjakumArInA siddhAMtano! Ape je For Private And Personal Use Only 131

Page #141
Apelo e siddhAMta che. e siddhAMtanI khAtara meM mArA upakArI pitA sAme jaMga mAMDyo che... e jaMgamAM huM vijayI banuM chuM to jinamata vijayI bane che. mArA gurudeva vijayI bane che.. mArA e pati, emano kuSTharoga maTI jAya to huM emanI sAthe vaiSayika sukho bhogavI zakuM." AvI mArI koI bhAvanA nathI ane mane evI viSayavAsanA satAvatI paNa nathI, gurudeva! bhagavAna RSabhadevanI e parama kRpA mAnuM chuM. Apa gurudevano divya anugraha mAnuM chuM! huM bahu ja saraLatAthI brahmacarya pALI zakuM chuM. eTaluM ja nahIM, teo paNa (uMbarANA) nirvikAra rahI zake che. juo ne temanAM nayanomAM eka paNa lITI che vikAranI? gurudeva! avilaMba mArA para kRpA karo. uMbararANAno kuSTharoga maTavo ja joIe. prabho! huM jANuM chuM karmono siddhAMta. azAtAvedanIya karmano udaya pravarte che temane. paNa e karmano udaya nikAcita nathI lAgato. e karmodaya parAvartanazIla hoI zake che. azAtAvedanIya karma, zAtAvedanIya karmamAM parivartana thaI zake. Apa karI zako! Apa zaktizALI cho. viziSTa jJAnIpuruSa cho." 132 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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bolatAM bolatAM mArI AMkhomAM AMsu UbharAyAM. huM ane tamArA putra gurudevanI sAme besI gayAM. dharmopadeza sAMbhaLavA AvelAM strI-puruSo haju tyAM ja hatAM. gurudeve e badhAne saMbodhIne kahyuM : he mahAnubhAvo, je uttama strI-puruSo sAdharmikonI bhAvapUrvaka bhakti kare che, emanA pratye hRdayanuM vAtsalya vahAve che teo kharekhara potAnA mastake jinAjJAne dhAraNa kare che. sAdharmika-vAtsalya eka mahAna dharma-ArAdhanA che. tIrthakaroe kahyuM che : ___ "egattha savvadhammA sAhimmaavacchalaM tu egtth| buddhitulAe tuliyA dovi a tullAI mnniaaii||' buddhinA trAjavAmAM eka tarapha badhA dharmo ane bIjA trAjavAmAM sAdharmika-vAtsalya rAkhavAmAM Ave to baMne samAna rahe che. sarva dharmo eTale devapUjA, gurudarzana, tapazcaryA, dAna, zIla vagere; enI sAme eka mAtra sAdharmika-vAtsalyano dharma barAbarI karI zake che. mATe tamArI zakti anusAra sAdharmika-bhakti karavI joIe. sAdharmikane gharaAMgaNe AvatAM joIne je manuSyane sneha utpanna thato nathI, e manuSyamAM samyagdarzana che ke kema enI zaMkA rahe che. arthAt e mANasamAM prAyaH samyatva-guNa na hoI zake. mATe vizeSarUpe je sAdharmiko ApattimAM phasAyelA hoya, dAridrathI gherAyelA hoya, roga-zokathI saMtapta hoya te sAdharmikono udAratAthI uddhAra karavo joIe. temane ApattimAMthI bacAvavA joIe, temanI daridratA dUra karavI joIe. temanA roga-zoka dUra karavAnA upAya karavA joIe. sAdharmika pratye hArdika prIti haze to ja temanI bhakti thaI zakaze. prIti vinA bhakti na thaI zake. paramAtmA jinezvaradevanA dharmazAsana pratye zraddhAvizvAsa rAkhanAro zrImaMta hoya ke garIba hoya, temanA pratye prIti hovI joIe. paramAtmA pratye prIti haze to temanA dharmazAsana pratye paNa prIti mANA 133 For Private And Personal Use Only

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jAgaze ane to dharmazAsananA AdhArabhUta sAdharmiko pratye paNa prIti thaze. A mArA paramAtmAnA zAsananA pratye zraddhA rAkhanArA che, mArA bhAIo che, mArI baheno che, huM temanI bhakti karuM.' Avo ullAsa tamArA hRdayamAM jAgavo joIe. jo tame zrAvaka cho, zrImaMta cho ane tamArA nagaramAM duHkhI sAdharmika hoya, to teno uddhAra karavAnI bhAvanA tamArA hRdayamAM jAgavI joIe. AcAryadevanI preraNA pAmIne nagaranA nagarazreSThI puNyadhana UbhA thayA ane gurudevane praNAma karI kahyuM : "gurudeva, rAjakumArI mayaNAsuMdarIne huM nagaranI bahAra je mAruM ghara che, te rahevA mATe bheTa ApuM chuM. enI icchA hoya eTalo samaya e gharamAM rahe. potAnuM ghara mAnIne rahe...' ane he mAtAjI.' mayaNAe potAnI sAsu kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : gurudevanI preraNAno saMketa pAmIne, e badhAM sukhI zrImaMta zrAvakazrAvikAo pota-potAnA ghare jaIne suMdara vastro, alaMkAro... sonAmahoro ane gharamAM Avazyaka evI badhI ja sAmagrI laIne AvyAM ane amArI sAme khUba prema ane AdarathI DhagalA karI dIdhA.' vacce zrIpAle kahyuM : "he mAtA, e badhuM joIne huM to mUDha jevo banI gayo hato. rAjakumArI pratyeno lokono e premabhAva, gurudevanI anupama karuNA ane e badhuM apUrva vAtAvaraNa.. kharekhara mAruM hRdaya gadgad thaI gayuM hatuM.' mayaNAe vAtanuM anusaMdhAna karatAM kahyuM : "gurudeve amane kahyuM : hamaNAM tame tamArA navA gRhamAM praveza karo. badhuM vyavasthita goThavI do. AvatI kAle tamAre mArI pAse AvavAnuM che. varlsa! tuM ciMtA nA karIza. tArA para bhagavAna RSabhadevano divya anugraha thayo che. eTaluM badhuM zubha ja thaze." ane he mAtAjI, ame A makAnamAM rahevA mATe AvI gayAM. amane amArA sAdharmika bhAI-bahenoe eTalI badhI sAmagrI ane dhana-saMpatti ApI hatI ke amAre amArI AjIvikAnI koI ciMtA rahI na hatI ane te ja gurudeve amane ja viziSTa dharmaArAdhanA batAvI hatI, te ame nizcita banIne karI zakyAM ane kevuM sAruM pariNAma AvavuM joItuM hatuM te pariNAma AvyuM. tamAro putra rogamukta banyo. 134 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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gurudeva pAsethI pAchA vaLatAM ame zrI RSabhaprAsAdamAM gayA hatA, tyAMthI meM eka loTo bharIne prabhunuM snAtraja La laI lIdhuM hatuM. A gharamAM jyAre ame AvyAM tyAre mArI sakhI lalitA ane nagarazreSThInAM dharmapatnI subhadrA hAjara hatAM. temaNe amAruM svAgata karyuM ane teo mArA mATe lAvelAM mUlyavAna vastro ane alaMkAro mane paherAvavA taiyAra thayAM. meM namratApUrvaka emane kahyuM : "Apa mArAM mAtAtulya cho, devI! paNa mAro saMkalpa che ke Amano (uMbarANAno) koDharoga maTe pachI ja zaNagAra sajavA. mATe mane kSamA karo." 'paNa mahArANI... ApanI mAtA rUpasuMdarInI mane AjJA che, A badhA alaMkAra tane paherAvI devAnA! tuM eka rAjakumArI che...' nA, nA, huM to eka kuSTharogInI patnI chuM. mAre gAmamAM ghara nathI ke sImamAM khetara nathI! huM eka akiMcana puruSanI patnI chuM.' subhadrAe mAro hAtha pakaDyo ne kahyuM : "rAja kumArI mayaNA, tArA hRdayanI jvALA huM joI zake che. kAraNa ke huM nArI chuM. tArA pitAe tArI sAthe je vartana karyuM e kAraNe mahArANI ochAM duHkhI nathI. huM emanI pAsethI AvuM chuM. AkhI rAta temaNe valopAtamAM pasAra karI che. AkhI rAta teo potAnI jAtane dhikkAratAM rahyAM. mahArAjAnA amAnuSI vyavahArathI atyaMta vyathita thaI gayAM..' bolatAM bolatAM subhadrAnI AMkho bhInI thaI gaI. bIjI bAju lalitA mArA navA gharane vyavasthita goThavatI jatI hatI ane AMkho sADInA pAlavathI lUchatI jatI hatI. meM jyAre zaNagAra sajavAno spaSTa inkAra karI dIdho tyAre subhadrAe mArA mAthe hAtha pheravIne kahyuM : "kumArI! tuM mahAsatI cho! tArA pati jaladIthI nIrogI bano... mArA yogya je kAMI kAma hoya te mane kahevarAvaje. A lalitA sAthe...' subhadrA cAlyAM gayAM. meM tamArA putranA zarIre haLavA hAthe paramAtmAnuM snAtra jaLa lagADavA mAMDyuM. emanA ekeeka ghAne sApha karIne pachI pATA bAMdhI dIdhA. lalitAe bhojana banAvI dIdhuM hatuM. meM emane bhojana karAvyuM mayaNA 135 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ane pachI lalitA sAthe meM paNa bhojana karI lIdhuM. pachI meM emane kahyuM : "ApaNe have ApaNA sAthIdAronA paDAva para ja Ie. teone A badhI vAtanI jANa karIe ke jethI teo ApaNI ciMtA nA kare ane ApaNe emane je kaMI AvazyakatA hoya te pUrI karI ApIe. ApaNI pAse aDhaLaka saMpatti AvI gaI che...' temaNe hA pADI. lalitAne ghare rAkhIne, ame baMne amArA paDAva tarapha kSiprA nadInA taTa para cAlI nIkaLyAM. joke rasto lAMbAM hato, paNa nisarganuM sauMdarya anupama hatuM. lAMbA lAMbA vAMsanA jhuMDa, enI para jhINA halyA karatA paDadAnI jema phelAyelI lajAmaNI. koIka kizorI saMtAkUkaDI ramatI hatI. kyAreka dekhAtI, kyAreka jaMgalanI hariyALImAM chupAI jatI. amArI sAthe mitratAnI adamya icchA, paNa zaramALa! hAsyamAM kalakala nAda. pagamAM abhilASA ane pachI araNyanI nirjanatAmAM vilIna thaI jAya che, eno avAja! huM kyAMya sudhI joI rahI, paNa e sAme nathI AvatI. mane thAkelI joIne rANA bolyA : "juo, A anAdikALathI araNyanA A phUlachAyA rastA para dUradUranA janmasthaLathI satata doDatI Ave che A girikanyA kSiprA! e thAkI to nathI! enuM lakSya che sAgara! vahetI vakhate ujjaDa dharatIne harIbharI karatI jAya che, A ja che jIvana! jIvanapatha para potAnA nirdhArita sthaLa tarapha jatAM jatAM mANasa jo potAnAM svajano-snehIo ane mitronuM bhaluM na karI zake to e kevuM jIvana? zuM mUlya A mAnavazarIranuM? sAgara tarasa nathI chipAvato, nadInuM madhura jaLa tarasa chipAve che. je saMpatti bIjAnI garIbAI dUra na kare, e saMpatti zA kAmanI? devI, tame Aje ahIM mArA 700 sAthIdAro pAse AvavAno nirNaya karyo... ethI mane anahada AnaMda thayo che!' emaNe utsAhamAM mAro hAtha pakaDI lIdho... paNa tarata ja pAcho kheMcI lIdho, jANe bhUla thaI gaI hoya! vAMsanA gADha jhuMDanI pelI tarapha jharaNAM dekhAya che. jaMgalanA hariyALA raMga upara nIla AkAzamAM sUrya jhUle che. AkAza keTaluM bhUruM che! AkAzanI nIlAza karatAM ya vadhu gADha, caMdaravAnI jhAlara jevI A parvatamALAo che. nIlAzanI bAbatamAM emanI ne AkAzanI vacce 136 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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spardhA jAmI che. AkAza karatAM parvatonI nIlAza vadhAre che. tethI sapheda vAdaLonAM jhUlphAM chUTAM chUTAM bichAvI dIdhAM che, parvatonI upara. yogasAdhanAmAM beThelA maharSinI jema zarIra para bhasmanI rekhA jevI manohara dekhAya che vAdaLInI rekhAo! yogasAdhanAmAM beThelA parvatane dhyAnabhaMga karavA mATe kUlapAMdaDAnI vacce aneka vRkSo varSAnA jaLanA tAlamAM apsarA banI gayAM che! paNa parvatonuM dhyAna tUTatuM nathI. vAdaLAMnI bhasma jharatA jharatAM lapasI rahI che, dharatI para AzIrvAdanI jema caraNapAdukA banIne! jaMgalI pakSInI jema vAdaLAM ahIM baMdhanamukta che. marajI mujaba ahIM tyAM pharyA kare che. jIvanano artha zodhe che? gADha jaMgalamAM 700 kuSTharogIonI nAnInAnI jhUMpaDIo, jAta-jAtanI nAnI-moTI velIo, vRkSone jANe hAthamAM hAtha nAMkhIne gUMthAyelI hatI. nAnAM-moTAM aneka prakAranAM phUla, phaLa ane rUpaguNano koI pAra na hato. vizALa prakRti phelAyelI hatI. ekatA ane maitrIno saMdeza laIne, dharatI para UbhelAM vRkSone asIma prakAza meLavavAno jANe nazo caDyo hato. badhAM sUrajane pI javA mATe UMce ne UMce jANe vadhI rahyAM hatAM. ahIM badhuM potapotAnA sthAne garimAmaya hatuM. badhuM ucca ane suMdara hatuM. ahIM rahelA 900 mANasonAM zarIra bhale rogagrasta hatAM, paNa mana taMdurasta hatAM. AtmA nirmaLa hatA. amane jotAM ja prabhAtakAkA, javAnasiMha vagere sAme doDI AvyA. ekeeka jhUMpaDI saLavaLI UThI. vAyuvege amArA AgamananA samAcAra badhe pahoMcI gayA. sAtaso ya kuSTharogI sAthIdAro amane gherI vaLyA. meM sahune jamIna para besI javA vinaMtI karI. sahu besI gayA. pachI gurudevanI pAse ame gayAM, e pUrve jinAlayamAM gayAM... tyAM badhe je AzcaryakArI ghaTanAo banI te badhI kahI saMbhaLAvI ane have ame ujjayinInI bahAra je nagarazreSThInA makAnamAM rahevAnA chIe, e paNa batAvI dIdhuM. badhAnAM mukha para AnaMdanAM toraNo baMdhAyAM. meM prabhAtakAkAne kahyuM : "tame sahu ahIM nizcita banIne rahejo. huM tamane joIe te badhI sAmagrI mokalAvI ApIza. thoDI sonAmahoro mayaNA 137 For Private And Personal Use Only

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tamArI pAse rAkho." meM eka sonAmahoro bharelI thelI temanI sAme mUkI dIdhI. have paramAtmAnI parama kRpAthI ane gurudevanA parama AzIrvAdathI tamArA rANAno roga thoDA ja divasomAM maTI jaze, evI mArI zraddhA che ane je upAyathI emano roga dUra thaze, e ja upAyathI tamArA sahuno kuSTharoga dUra karavAnI mArI bhAvanA che. mATe tame sahu AjathI "zrI RSabhadevAya nama:' maMtrano khUba jApa karajo. avAra-navAra ame tamane maLatA rahIzuM..." thoDoka samaya tyAM rokAIne ame pAchA nagara tarapha cAlyA. javAnasiMha amArI sAthe amArA ghara sudhI AvI gayo. 138 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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AkhA rAjamahelamAM khaLabhaLATa macI gayo hato. aMtepuranA rakhevALa, senApatio, maMtrIo ane dAsa-dAsIonAM moM jANe sivAI gayAM hatAM. emanI badhI cahala-pahala cUpacUpa ane dabAyelA pagale thaI rahI hatI. mahAmaMtrInI bagI Ave, na Ave ne jatI rahe. mahArAjAnA aMgata maMtrIno cahero gaMbhIra ane taMga hato. bIjA rAjapuruSo doDAdoDa karatA hatA ne raghavATamAM hatA. rAte dIvA saLagyA, paNa jANe ujAsa ja nahIM. be divasa pUrve Akho rAjamahela rozanIthI jhaLahaLI UThyo hato. mahela ja nahIM, rAjadhAnInI AkhI nagarImAM jhaLahaLATa hato. AnaMda ane utsavanuM parva UjavAtuM hatuM. brAhmaNonA vedagAnathI savAra UgyuM hatuM. mahelanA daravAje TaMkAnizAna gagaDatA hatA. baporanA jamaNavAramAM AkhuM nagara UmaTyuM hatuM. rAjarajavADAMnA mahemAnothI atithibhavano dhamadhamatAM hatAM. jarakasI jAmA ane lAla-lIlA-kesarI raMganA sAphAothI darabAra khaMDa ropha mArato hato. najarANAMnI tAsako svIkArAtI hatI ane aMdhAruM UtaratAM to nAcanA chama-chamAchama-chama ane tabalAnA dhinnaka-dhAnA paDaghAthI mahela guMjI UThyo hato. rAjakumArI surasuMdarInAM lagna thayAM hatAM. ane Aje? badhuM sUmasAma hatuM. cahalapahala hatI, AvanajAvana hatI, nityanA niyamita krama pramANe badho vyavahAra cAlato hato, paNa emAM jANe prANa ja na hato. eka vajanadAra boja mahela para paDelo hato. jaladI Ukale nahIM evI gUMca paDelI hatI. mahArAjA prajApALa emanA khaMDamAM vyagra banI AMTA mAratA hatA. ghaDIka ghUMvAMpUvAM thatA hatA, hAtha masaLatA hatA. maMtrIo upara ane rAjapuruSo para rIsa utAratA hatA. gussAmAM ne gussAmAM e badhAMne khaMDamAMthI cAlyA javA mATe barADA pADatA hatA. becAra vAra myAnamAMthI talavAra kADhI, havAmAM vIMjhI khaMDanA daravAjAnI bahAra pahoMcI gayA hatA, paraMtu gaMbhIra mahAmaMtrI emane samajAvI-paTAvI khaMDamAM lAvatA hatA. mahAmaMtrI somadeva khaMDamAMthI khasatA ja na hatA. mayaNA 139 For Private And Personal Use Only

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mahAmaMtrInA dekhAvaDA vRddha caherA para vaphAdArI ane thoDIka murabbIvaTanI jhAMya UpaselI hatI. mahArAjAne teo aMdara-bahArathI barAbara jANatA. vizvAsu hatA ane prajJAvaMta hatA. mahArAjA emanA para gusso karatA, trADa paNa pADatA, paNa emanI vinavaNIne vaza paNa thaI jatA. mahAmaMtrIe mahArAjAne kahyuM : "mahArAjA, vaLI eka vakhata dAsIne mahArANI pAse mokalI joIe?" mahArAjA mahAmaMtrI sAme joI rahyA ane manomana bolatA hoya ema kahyuM : "dAsIthI zuM vaLaze?' chatAM temaNe saMmati ApI. mahAmaMtrIe rAdhAne bolAvI rANIvAsamAM rANI rUpasuMdarI pAse mokalI. dAsI jevI gaI evI ja pAchI AvI. teNe be hAtha joDI kahyuM : "mahArAjA, rANIvAsanA daravAjA sajjaDa baMdha che. baMdha daravAjA bahAra mahArANInA piyarathI lAvelo cokIdAra khullI talavAre pahero bhare che. koIne aMdara javA deto nathI. mane paNa ghasIne nA pADI ane kahyuM mahArANI devIe koIne paNa aMdara javAnI nA pADI che." meM kahyuM ke "mane mahArAjAe pote mokalI che..." to kahe - "mahArAjAne paNa aMdara javAnI manAI che... to tArI zI vAta?' rAdhA mahArAjA sAme jotI UbhI rahI. mahArAjAe ene izArAthI bahAra javAnuM kahyuM. e bahAra gaI eTale mahArAjA talavAra kheMcIne tADUkI UThayA : "mArA rAjamAM, mArA mahelamAM mane... mahArAjAne rANIvAsamAM javAnI baMdhI? e cokIdAranuM mAthuM vADhI nAkhuM." mahArAjA khaMDanI bahAra dhasI jatA hatA, tyAM mahAmaMtrIe manAvI lIdhA. talavAra myAna karI. thoDA narama paDIne bolyA: "mahAmaMtrI, tameya DosA thaI gayA. nahitara tame cUpa besI raho?' mahAmaMtrI mauna rahyA. mahArAjA bolyA : somadeva, maneya kyAM avaLI mati sUjhI? mAre zA mATe mayaNA sAthe vAdavivAda karavo joIto hato? e rAja kuMvarI 1415 varSanI ane huM 60 varSano! mAre jidda karavI joItI na hatI... chatAM meM zuM khoTuM karyuM che? e chokarIne enAM potAnAM karmo para bharoso che... e mane mithyAbhimAnI kahI jAya... zuM mAre sAMbhaLI levAnuM? ene koDhIyA sAthe paraNAvI te meM khoTuM karyuM che? nA, meM nathI paraNAvI, enAM karmoe ene paraNAvI che! e sukhI ke duHkhI enAM karmothI thavAnI che. to pachI enI mAtAe zA mATe 140 mamaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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ATalI badhI rIsa mArA para utAravAnI?' mahAmaMtrIe kahyuM : "mArA nAtha! kSamA karajo, paNa mAruM namra sUcana che ke Apa pote rANIvAsamAM padhAro..." nA, nA somadeva, pelo enA piyarano cokIdAra... mArAthI kaMIka AvuM vetarAI jaze... AvaDA moTA rAjyano rAjA potAnA rANIvAsathI ema ne ema pAcho phare kharo? somadeva, mane to e rANIno AvAsa ja saLagAvI mUkavAnuM mana thAya che. rANIne bhAgIne enI dIkarI pAse javuM hoya to jAya ke enA piyaramAM jAya, mane enI paravA nathI." "to pachI mahArANInA bhAI sAmatarAjA puNyapAlane bolAvIne emane mokalIe to?' mahAmaMtrIe navo vikalpa sUcavyo. rUpasuMdarInAM mAtA-pitA to mRtyu pAmyAM hatAM. bhAI puNyapAla sAmatarAjA hatA. mahArAjAne mahAmaMtrIno A vikalpa gamyo. aMgata maMtrIne bolAvIne sAmaMta rAjA puNyapAlane bolAvyA. teo ujjayinImAM ja rahetA hatA. puNyapAla AvyA. mahArAjAne ane mahAmaMtrIne maLyA. badhI paristhiti jANI. mahArANI rUpasuMdarIe mayaNA sAthe thayelA anyAyanA virodhamAM mahArAjA sAthe rahevAno ke bolavAno paNa vyavahAra toDI nAMkhyo hato. bhAIne Avelo jANI rUpasuMdarIe rANIvAsano daravAjo kholyo. mahArANIe moTAbhAIne praNAma karyA. rAjA puNyapAle khUba vAtsalyathI rUpasuMdarIne kahyuM : "bahena, mahArAjA sAthe samAdhAna karI le. mayaNAnuM to je thavAnuM haze te thaze. enAM karmo..." moTAbhAI, ema na bolo. mayaNA mArI putrI che. mahArAjAnI putrI nathI? tamArI bhANeja nathI? zuM e kuMvarI anAtha hatI ke ene AvA raste bhaTakatA eka koDhIyA sAthe paraNAvI dIdhI? mArI paNa anumati na lIdhI?" sahiSNutA nArInuM AbhUSaNa che, paNa anyAyane mAthuM jhukAvIne sahana karI levo e nArIdharma nathI. pati anyAyanA mArge cAle.... patnI cUpa rahIne sahana karI le, to badhAne nukasAna thaze. pRthvI para pApabhAra vadhaze. e pApanAM phaLa niSpApa lokoe paNa bhogavavAM paDe che. tethI e bhayaMkara lAMchana ane asahya apamAna pachI paNa huM deha dhArI rAkhIne jIvita rahuM, sukha-saMpatti ane rAjabhoga bhogavuM? e mArA jIvananuM lakSya nathI. huM have anyAya, adharma ane pApanI viruddha saMgrAma karIza. meM pratijJA karI che ke mANasA 141 For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArI mayaNA jyAM sudhI eNe kheDelA saMgrAmamAM vijayI na bane, eno vara nIrogI na bane tyAM sudhI ane enA pitA enI kSamA na mAMge tyAM sudhI huM A mahelano tyAga karIza ane mArA mAthAnA vALano aMboDo nahIM vALuM. A vALa sadAya chuTTA raheze. bhale e mATe jagata mane nArI nahIM, paNa rAkSasI kahe! paNa jagata jANI le ke nArI sRSTi race che. nArI kalyANI che. nArI pApAtmAono-durAtmAono saMhAra karanArI paNa hoya che. nArIne durbaLa samajIne mahArAjAe bharI rAjasabhAmAM rAjakumArI mayaNAne eka koDhIyA sAthe paraNAvI dIdhI, apamAnita karI, aTTahAsya karyuM... huM eno badalo laIza. jagata jANaze ke nArIhRdaya komaLa jarUra hoya che, paNa durbaLa nathI! mArI A pratijJA pUrNa karavAmAM moTAbhAI, tame mane madada nahIM karo to tamArA ujvala kuLane kalaMka lAgaze.' rUpasuMdarInI daDha vANI sAMbhaLIne rAjA puNyapAla prasanna thayA. teo bolyA: 'bahenI, tAro roSa ne pratijJA yogya che. tArI putrIe ne mArI bhANeje je saiddhAMtika saMgrAma mAMDyo che, te yogya ja che. te chatAM mane ema lAge che ke mahAvijJAna zraddheya ane AdaraNIya gurudeva subuddhinI salAha levI joIe. ane teo jo anuti Ape to huM kAle ja tane mArA mahelamAM premathI laI javA taiyAra chuM.' 142 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir bhAI puNyapAla gayA ne rANIvAsanA daravAjA baMdha thaI gayA. mahArAjA ane mahAmaMtrI vaLI mathAmaNamAM paDI gayA. tyAM rAjA puNyapAlano saMdezo maLatAM paMDita subuddhi rAjamahelamAM pahoMcyA. teo vizvabharanA sAhitya, dharma, tattvajJAna ane zAstronA UMDA abhyAsI hatA. mayaNAsuMdarInA vidyAguru hatA. rANI rUpasuMdarI paNa emanI pAse ja bhaNyAM hatAM. emanA dharma-tattvajJAnanI aneka carcAonAM rasAyaNomAM mahArANInA manaH koSa ghaDAyA hatA. sarvakSazAsananA siddhAMto AtmasAt karyA hatA. rUpasuMdarIne hamezAM emanA vatsala AdhAranI khevanA rahetI hatI. subuddhi paMDitane paNa emanA mATe potAnI dIkarI jeTalAM ja heta-prIta-mAyA baMdhAyAM hatAM. mahArANInA jIvanamAM UbhI thayelI gUMcathI emanuM citta paNa pArAvAra glAni anubhavatuM hatuM. teo saMdeza maLatAM ja doDI AvyA hatA. 'he mahAdevI, kema acAnaka notarAM mokalyAM?' 'ApanA moDhe 'mahAdevI'? ApanI to huM rUpA chuM... rUpu chuM... ApanI For Private And Personal Use Only samA

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rUpu!' zarUAtamAM saheja gusso karI rUpasuMdarI pachI dhrusake dhrusake raDI paDyAM. baMdha haiyAno valopAta AgaLA kholIne vahI Avyo. kazuM bolyA vinA subuddhi rANInA vAMse vatsala hAtha pheravatA rahyA. emane raDavA dIdhAM. AMsu lUchI mahArANI bAjumAM beThAM. cUpa-cUpa. caherA para viSAda ane asahAyatA chavAyelAM hatAM. keTalIka kSaNo mauna rahyA pachI rANI bolyAM : 'Apane mAMDIne badhI vAta karuM.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir subuddhie aTakAvIne kahyuM : 'mane badhI khabara paDI che, rUpA!' 'Apane zI khabara paDI? Ape zuM karyuM?' meM badhuM sAMbhaLyuM che, karyuM kaMI ja nathI. paNa mahArANIe zuM karyuM?' 'meM mahArAjA mATe mArA rANIvAsanA daravAjA baMdha karyA che. mArI putrI sAthe temaNe karelA anyAyano mAre badalo levo che ane te mATe vahelAmAM vahelI take A mahela choDIne mArA bhAInA mahelamAM eka sAdhvI jevuM jIvana jIvavuM che. A mATe tamArI salAha levA tamane bolAvyA che.' 'rUpA, ApaNA mahArAjA eTalA sArA che, kulIna che ne bhalA che. A rAjakuLanI dezamAM moTI pratiSThA che. eTale ahIM tarakaTo nathI ke atyAcAro nathI...' 'Apa zuM kaho cho? mayaNA para atyAcAra nathI thayo? enI sAthe ghora anyAya nathI thayo? have mane rasto batAvo. eTalA mATe to Apane maLavA mana dhamapachADA mAratuM hatuM.' ATalo samaya baMdha rANIvAsamAM tame zuM karatAM hatAM?' 'aMtaranAM dvAra ughADavA mathatI hatI... RSi-munionA upadezone vAgoLatI hatI.' 'to pachI nirNaya?' mahela choDavAno... bhAInA ghera javAno. mayaNAne game te rIte upayogI banavAno.' A nirNaya aphara?' 'aphara! lagabhaga aphara!' mA 'kema lagabhaga?' 'ApanI sAthe vAta karyA pachI ja pAko nirNaya thAya.' 'ethI pitA-putrIno saMgharSa maTI jaze?' For Private And Personal Use Only 143

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nA, e saMgharSamAM mArI putrI vijayI banaze. te mATe huM bhAInA ghera rahIne ene upayogI banI zakuM.' "pachI zuM?' mayaNAno prazna patI jAya, enA patino kuSTharoga maTI jAya, basa, pachI mAre... mAre sAdhvI banI javuM che!' sAdhvI? zA mATe?' AtmasAkSAtkAra mATe, brahmasAkSAtkAra mATe!" bhale, e samaye je ucita lAge te karaje . paNa mArI eka vAta mAnaje.' eka nahIM, Apa kaho e badhI ja vAta mAnIza. paraMtu Apa mane have A mahelamAM rahevAnI AjJA nA karazo. ATalI mArI vinaMtI che." bhale, bhAInA ghera jaje. sAmatarAjA puNyapAla tane khUba cAhe che. tuM tyAM svasthatAthI rahI zakIza. paNa tArA manamAM mahArAjA pratye roSa nA rAkhIza. emanA pratye durbhAvanA nA rAkhIza. rUpA! A eka saMgharSa che. eka tarapha mahArAjAno ahaMkAra che, kartutvanuM abhimAna che, to bIjI tarapha mayaNAno siddhAMta-saMgharSa che. vivekano saMgharSa che." "rUpA, te chatAM meM ahaMkArI puruSanI AMkho bhInI joI hatI. emanA hRdayamAMthI putrI mATenI mamatAno sparza gayo nathI. paraMtu e eka rAjA che. sattAdhIza che. have e pAchaLa pagalAM nahIM bharI zake. ApaNe emane kSamA ja ApavAnI che." kSamA? AvA amAnavIya karma karanArane kSamA? e nahIM bane gurudeva.. mArI samaju ane satI putrInuM ghora apamAna karavAno badalo to emane maLavo ja joIe. emanA ahaMkArano cUro thaI javo joIe." thaze rUpA, tane paramAtmazakti para ane mahAna gurunA prabhAva para zraddhA nathI? uMbararANAno koDharoga je divase maTaze e divase ahaMkArInA ahaMkArano cUro thaI ja javAno che. jaina dharmanA niMdakonAM mukha sivAI javAnAM che. tuM rAha jo. dhIraja rAkha. mayaNA koI sAmAnya strI-kanyA nathI. enuM vyaktitva bhavya che, virala che ane daivI zaktithI sabhara che." rUpasuMdarInA mukhethI eka vedanA-kAvya sarI paDyuM : he deva, jhaMkhI'tI jharamara jhAMkhI tyAM evI musaLadhAra vai 144 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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prItinuM koruM pAnetara zetAna-kare coLAI gayuM... koI zata-zata yugathI nIkaLyA'tA sukhanI zodhamahIM yAtrI ahIM saMsAre ramatAM ramatAM dojakha jone zodhAI gayuM... huM phATI AMkhe zodhI rahI sonerI rajakaNa sukhaDAMnI tyAM jIvanakerA sUtramahIM duHkha motI banI parovAI gayuM... amRta to hAthe nahotuM caDhayuM paNa nIra hatuM nirmaLa thoDuM durbhAgya juo re te ya halAhala saMgAthe ghoLAI gayuM... rUpasuMdarI raDI paDI. subuddhie enA mastake potAno hAtha mUkI ene zAMta karI. rUpasuMdarI bolI: 'gurudeva, mAnuM hRdaya mA ja samajI zake. mArI lADalI putrI atyAre kevI vikaTa sthitimAM che... enI kalpanA karuM chuM ne mAruM kALajuM kaMpI UThe che. mArA manamAM mahArAjA pratye tIvra roSa saLage che. huM have emanuM mukha paNa jovA nathI icchatI. eTale A mahelano tyAga karI bhAInA ghera cAlI jaIza." gurudeva, mahArAjA bhale zauryathI, vIryathI, aizvaryathI ane rUpaguNathI bharelA hoya, paNa teo potAnI ja sujJA putrInI ja vAta na samajI zakyA. enA jJAnapUrNa kathananA hArdane na samajI zakyA. eTaluM ja nahIM, teo gama paNa na khAI zakyA. nAnakaDI putrInI sAthe vAda-vivAdanI bAliza ceSTA karI putrInA bhavane bagADavAnuM ghora pApa karyuM...' subuddhi rUpasuMdarInA Akrozane AMkho baMdha karIne, saumya bhAvathI sAMbhaLI rahyA. thoDI kSaNo mATe khaMDamAM mauna chavAyuM. pachI gaMbhIra svare subuddhi bolyA: mANA 145 For Private And Personal Use Only

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"rUpA! rANI rUpasuMdarI! tAro Akroza sAco che. potAnI priya ane nirdoSa putrI sAthe eno pitA ja jyAre anyAya kare tyAre mAtAnA hRdayamAMthI Akroza pragaTe ja. paraMtu mAre tane eTalI ja vAta kahevI che ke tuM mayaNAnA bhaviSyanI ciMtA na karIza. e paramAtmA RSabhadevanA aciMtya anugrahane prApta karelI che e gurudeva municandrasUrijInI kRpAno prasAda ene prApta thavAno che. eTale enuM bhaviSya ujvala che ane mane to bhaviSya dekhAya che, ke.." zuM gurudeva?" mayaNA potAnA devakumAra jevA pati sAthe A ja mahelamAM pAchI pharaze! enA para svarganA deva kusumavRSTi karaze! rUpA, dhIraja rAkha ane samayane pasAra thavA de.." gurudeva subuddhine AdarapUrvaka vidAya ApI. sAmatarAjA puNyapAla potAnI bahena rUpasuMdarIne levA ratha laIne rAjamahelanA dvAre pahoMcyA. rUpasuMdarIe badhA zaNagAra utArI nAkhyA. zarIra para badhAM ja zveta vastro paherIne te rathamAM jaIne besI gaI. ratha ujjayinInA rAjamArga para doDavA lAgyo. 146 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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e divase AkAzamAM vAdaLAM chavAyAM hatAM. nIlameghamAM phAlganInI zyAmala rUpazobhAnuM citraNa thatuM hatuM. acAnaka AkAzamAM divya prakAzamaMDaLa UmaTyuM. meM gharanI agAsImAMthI joyuM to eka susajjita ratha mArA makAnanI AgaLa AvIne Ubho hato. huM maTakuM ya mAryA vinA joI rahI... e rathamAMthI mArI mA rANI rUpasuMdarI UtarI rahI hatI! enuM anupama rUpa! enuM divya saundarya! kudaratI prakAzamAM e ati suMdara dekhAtI hatI... joke tenA zarIra para zveta svaccha vastro hatAM. koI ja zaNagAra na hato. hAthamAM saubhAgyanAM mAtra ratnakaMkaNa dekhAtAM hatAM. huM jhaDapathI gharanI bahAra AvI. mArI mA pagathiyAM caDhI ja rahI hatI. meM eno hAtha pakaDyo. e jhaDapathI upara AvI mane bheTI paDI. enI AMkhomAMthI AMsu TapakavA mAMDyAM. te raDavA lAgI hatI. ubararANA paNa khaMDamAMthI bahAra AvI gayA hatA ane amane mA--putrIne ekabIjAne vaLagI rotI joI rahyA. huM mAne gharanA khaMDamAM laI gaI. tene palaMga para besADI. e mana hatI. enI AMkho AMsubhInI hatI. huM mAnuM duHkha barAbara samajatI hatI. te khUba ja asvastha hatI... putrInuM duHkha jovAnuM enA bhAgyamAM lakhAyuM haze... paNa mane lAgyuM ke mArI mA duHkhathI bhAMgI paDI hatI. alabatta, emAM nimittakAraNa huM ja hatI. huM ja enI pragaTa vedanA hatI. huM mAnI dazAno anubhava karatI hatI. manamAM thatuM hatuM ke thoDI vedanA mAgI lauM. enI pAsethI laIne thoDuM vadhAre sahana karI lauM. mAno bhAra kaMIka haLavo karavA meM kahyuM : mA, tuM zA mATe ATalI duHkhI thAya che? tuM mane duHkhamAM jue che mATe? paNa nA, mArI mA, huM duHkhI nathI.. huM to parama sukhI chuM. tane khabara che RSabhaprAsAdamAM paramAtmAno kevo apUrva anugraha thayo?' meM mAtAne mayamA 147 For Private And Personal Use Only

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e ghaTanA kahI saMbhaLAvI. enI AMkho vikasvara thaI gaI! te bolI UThI: 'kharekhara! adbhuta! mArI dIkarI, A tAruM parama saubhAgya kahevAya!' e pachI meM pauSadhazALAmAM gurudevanA upadezathI sAdharmikoe karelI apUrva bhaktinI vAta karI, to mArI mAnI AMkho harSathI vikastara thaI gaI. ane tyAM ja eNe AMkho baMdha karI, be hAtha joDI, mastaka namAvI gurudevane bhAvavaMdanA karI. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mAe kahyuM : 'beTI, tArA vinA mahelamAM rahevAnuM mane kSaNabhara paNa na gamyuM, meM tArA pitAnuM moM jovAnI paNa spaSTa nA pADI dIdhI hatI. aMtepuranA daravAjA baMdha karAvI dIdhA hatA. chevaTe gurudeva subuddhi padhAryA. temaNe ghaNI sAMtvanA ApI. tArA ujvala bhaviSyanI sacoTa vAta karI... mahArAjAnI bhUlane kSamA karI devAnI preraNA ApI... paNa e preraNA mArA gaLe na ja UtarI. mArA manamAM haju paNa tArA pitA pratye tIvra roSanI Aga saLagI rahI che. tArI sAthe thayelA ghora anyAyano badalo levA mana talasI rahyuM che.' 'mA, gurudeva subuddhinI vAta sAcI che, sArI che. zA mATe mArA pitA pratye roSa karavAno? e eka puruSa che. sattvazIla puruSa che. emanAmAM pauruSa bhareluM che. teo potAnI eka nAnakaDI putrInuM apamAna sahana na ja karI zake! e eka parAkramI puruSanI svAbhAvika nabaLAI hoya che. ane mArI mA! mane, mArA manamAM mArA pitA pratye jarAya durbhAva nathI. A to eka saiddhAMtika saMgharSa che. 'karma kare so hoya!' A vAta mAre emane manAvavI che, samajAvavI che.' paNa beTI, e mATe putrI para pitA ATalA krUra banI zake? AvA pASANahRdayI banI zake? eka araNyavAsI, ajANyA ane kuSTharogI yuvAna sAthe tane paraNAvI dIdhI? A to jIvana-maraNano savAla banI gayo che, beTI..." 148 mA, Ane ApaNe siddhAMtanuM yuddha kahevuM joIe. AvA yuddhamAM rAga-dveSa na hovA joIe. AmAM to zAMta rIte vijayanA mArge prayANa karavAnuM che.' 'beTI, teM zuM vicAryuM che? tuM cAla mArI sAthe, huM rAjamahela choDI tArA mAmAnA ghera rahevA cAlI gaI chuM. tuM paNa tArA vara sAthe cAla. ApaNe For Private And Personal Use Only magaNA

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tyAM sAthe rahIzuM. huM tane levA ja AvI chuM.' 'nA, mA! mArAthI mAmAnA ghera na avAya. mane A gharamAM rahevA mATe gurudeve AjJA karI che ane A ja gharamAM teo amane baMnene koI nirdoSaniSpApa dharmaArAdhanA karAvavAnA che!' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir rUpasuMdarI vicAramAM garakAva banI. pachI potAnI sAthe lAvelI eka ratnajaDita nAnI peTI kholI. temAM eka ratnapratimA hatI. nIlaratnanI suramya pratimAnAM meM darzana karyA. mAe kahyuM : 'beTI, A pratimAjI mArI pitRparaMparAmAM mane maLI che. A pratimA huM tane ApuM chuM. tuM pratidina A pratimAnI trikALa pUrjA karaje ane AnuM abhiSeka jaLa tamArA baMnenAM zarIra para chAMTajo.' meM khUba bhaktibhAvapUrvaka paramAtmAnI pratimA grahaNa karI ne e ja ratnamaya peTImAM mUkI, eka suMdara gavAkSamAM padharAvyA. mAe kahyuM : beTI, A pratimAnI roja aSTaprakArI pUjA karaje. saMdhyA samaye AratI karaje. tAro zoka-glAni-nirAzA badhuM dUra thaI jaze.' 'mA, tArI bhAvanA phaLo, tuM mArI guru paNa che ne! guruvANI phaLatI hoya che.' beTI, jaladI uMbararANA nIrogI bane to tArA pitAno ahaMkAra cUracUra thaI jAya... e tArAM caraNomAM namatA Ave ane je ajJAnI loko jaina dharmanI ane tArI niMdA kare che, te badhA mauna thaI jAya. jaina dharmano nagaramAM ane mAlavadezamAM jayajayakAra thaI jAya!' magaNA 'thaze mA! thoDA divasomAM ja thaze. tuM dhIraja rAkha ane manane svastha rAkha, mArA pitAjI Ama to saraLa che, eTale pragaTa satyano svIkAra karatAM vAra nahIM lagADe. Ama to gurudeva municandrasUrijInA teo bhakta che. gurudevanI kRpAthI ja teo daivI upadravothI mukta thayA hatA ne? mA, e ja gurudeva tArA jamAIne nIrogI karaze ja. tane khabara nathI. pauSadhazALAmAM gurudeve amane baMnene sAthe joIne pUchyuM hatuM : 'mayaNA, tArI sAthe A puNyazALI puruSa koNa che?' temaNe emane puNyazALIprabhAvazALI kahyA che... to koI rahasya haze ne emanA manamAM? mA, kAle savAre amAre emanI pAse javAnuM che. teo amArA mATe koI eka AdhyAtmika yAMtrika ke mAMtrika upAya batAvaze. mane to ekaso eka TakA For Private And Personal Use Only 149

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vizvAsa che ke tArA jamAI nIrogI banI jaze. mATe tuM zoka na karIza. du:khI nA thaIza. A siddhAMtanA yuddhamAM huM vijayI banIza. e tArA mATe moTo mahotsavano prasaMga banI jaze.' mAtAe zAMta avAje kahyuM : "dhIrajathI sahIne kartavyapAlana karavuM, e ja manuSyano zreSTha dharma che. jyAre je paristhiti utpanna thAya, je bhUmikA prApta thAya tyAre tene anurUpa kartavyapAlanamAMthI pAchA na haThavuM, jIvanano A ja uttama mArga che. beTI, mArA AzIrvAda che tane... yazasvinI thAo.' rAtrinuM aMdhAruM pRthvI para utarI AvyuM hatuM, mArI mAtA UbhI thaI. mane chAtIe cAMpI AliMganothI bhIMjavI dIdhI. saDasaDATa te makAnanI bahAra nIkaLI gaI. rathamAM besI gaI. meM enAM caraNono sparza karyo ane ratha aMdhakAramAM adRzya thaI gayo. huM rANAnI sAme AvIne UbhI. mArA mukha para smita relAyuM. paNa, koIka hase che, enA hAsya ane AnaMdanuM kAraNa jANyA vinA bIjo mANasa hasI nathI zakato. paNa koIkanA AMsu, zoka, du:kha joIne enI vyathAnuM mULa kAraNa jANyA vagara paNa mANasa eka vAra to acAnaka vyathita thaI jAya che. AMkha chalakAI jAya che. mANasa pIgaLI jAya che. viSAda varSanI jema bIjAone bhIMjavI de che. AkAzamAMthI AMsu jhare che ne pRthvIno khoLo bhIno thaI jAya che. sUrajane vAdaLAM DhAMkI de to dharatI para kALI chAyA UtarI Ave che. barAbara e ja rIte, mArI mAtAnAM AMsu... zoka... vyathA joIne rANAnuM mana bharAI AvyuM hatuM. emaNe pahelI ja vAra mArI mAtAne joI hatI. te jotA ja rahI gayA hatA. mAtAnA suMdara caherAnI khinnatAe emanA moDhA para kALI chAyA pAtharI dIdhI hatI. temanI AMkho chalakAI gaI hatI. amArI mAtA-putrInI vAto teo sAMbhaLatA hatA, paraMtu mArA khyAla mujaba badhuM samajatA na hatA. kAraNa ke temanuM jIvana ja jaMgalomAM, araNyomAM vItyuM hatuM! haju to pahelI ja vAra suMdara ane pAkA makAnamAM temaNe vasavATa karyo hato. cAra varSanI uMmare to teo mahelamAMthI je galamAM pahoMcI gayA hatA. e mahela emanI smRtimAM na hato. 15o mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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rANA bhAvuka hatA. eTaluM to teo samajatA hatA ke emanI sAthe mArA pitAe mArAM lagna karyA te jarAya ucita nathI karyuM ane eTale ja mArI mAtA paNa duHkhI-duHkhI thaI gaI che. emanI sAme smita pharakAvatI UbhI rahI, tyAre temanA mukha para viSAda hato. teo dardabharyA svare bolyA : devI, ApaNA ja kAraNe mAtAjI duHkhI-duHkhI thaI gayAM che... mArAthI emanuM duHkha joyuM na gayuM.." nAtha, e mA che ne? dIkarInuM duHkha mAne bahu duHkhI kare ja, e mane duHkhI mAne che..." "te sAcI vAta che ne? mArI sAthe... mArA jevA kuSTharogI sAthe eka sAmAnya kanyA paNa lagna karIne duHkhI thAya to pachI tame to rAja kumArI cho! tame kharekhara, jANIbUjIne du:khI thayAM cho...' meM kamalaprabhAnI sAme sasmita joIne kahyuM : "A tamArA lADalAnA DahApaNabharelA zabdo hatA..." pachI emanI sAme joyuM... emanA gorA gorA mukha para zaramanA zeraDA paDyA hatA. teo maMda-maMda hasI rahyA hatA. meM emane e vakhate madhura svare kaheluM : "mArA deva, saMgharSa vinAnA jIvanano koI artha kharo? saMgharSa vagara kyAMya jIvana hoya che? vaLI mArA jIvanamAM to tame mArI sAthe ja cho... ane ApaNe jaMgalamAM nathI, nagaramAM chIe! ApaNA para paramAtmA RSabhadevanI ane gurudevanI paramakRpA che! ApaNane nagaranA hajAro sAdharmika bhAI-bahenonI hUMpha che! pachI ApaNe duHkhI kevI rIte? paNa lagnajIvanano artha... vaiSayika sukha... te to mArAthI tamane nathI maLatuM ne?' oho... tame to mArI dayA ciMtavavA lAgyA! mane... mArA manamAM viSayavAsanA jarAya satAvatI nathI. tame nizcita raho. jyAM sudhI tame pUrNa nIrogI nahIM bano tyAM sudhI sahaja rIte ApaNe brahmacarya pALavAnuM che ane pALIzuM. kAraNa ke gurudeva ApaNane je koI roganivAraNano upAya batAvaze temAM brahmacaryapAlana to karavAnuM haze ja. e pAlana vinA koI sAdhanA saphaLa nathI banatI." rANI kamalaprabhA ekAgra citte mArI vAto sAMbhaLI rahyAM hatAM. zrIpAla mayaNA 151 For Private And Personal Use Only

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paNa zAMta citte zravaNa karatA hatA. temanuM rUpa khIlyuM hatuM. temanuM sauMdarya pAMgaryuM hatuM. zrI siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanAthI emanI samajazakti ane vicArazakti paNa vikasI hatI. joke teo ochuM bolatA hatA. "mane koDhIyAonA ToLAmAM mUkI mArI jiMdagI barabAda karI nAMkhI', A vicAra mULamAMthI nIkaLI gayo hato. "mane kADhI lokone soMpIne mArI mAtAe mArI jIvanarakSA karI che." e vicAra emanA manamAM dRDha thayo hato. kamalaprabhAe mane pUchyuM : "beTI, pachI tame baMne gurudeva pAse kyAre gayAM hatAM? gurudeve tamane roganivAraNano zo upAya batAvyo hato?' 152 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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nahi 23 ( tyAre prabuddha AcAryazrI municandrasUrine potAnI antarmukha AtmAnubhUti ane zAstrAnubhUti, eka puNyazAlI yugalanA duHkhanivAraNa mATe upayogamAM levI paDI hatI. te mATe temane AtmalakSI brahma-zikhara parathI nIce UtaravuM paDyuM hatuM. e uttama jIvo samajI zake evI vAstavika saraLa bhASAmAM potAnA uccatama zAstrajJAnane kholavuM paDyuM hatuM. parokSa ne parama tattvane ahIM ane atyAre ja" pragaTa karavA vivaza thavuM paDyuM hatuM. jyAre ekAMta antarmukha AtmAnubhUtine, jIvananA pratipaLanA AcAra-vyavahAra ane mAnavIya saMbaMdhone AdhAra ApavA mATe e dizAmAM vALavI paDI hatI. te yugamAM bhAratIya AkAzamAM eka divya vANInI garjanA saMbhaLAtI hatI. te dhvani ujjayinInI vizALa pauSadhazALAmAMthI UThI rahyo hato AcAryo'haM kavirahamahaM vAdirAT paNDito'haM, daivajJo'haM bhiSagahamahaM mAntrikastAntriko'ham / rAjannasyAM jaladhivalayAmekhalAyAmilAyAM, AjJAsiddhaH kimiti bahunA siddhasArasvato'ham / / huM AcArya chuM. huM kavi chuM. huM vAdIomAM samrATa chuM. huM paMDita chuM. huM daivajJa chuM. huM bhiSa-mahAvadya chuM. huM mAMtrika ne tAMtrika chuM. huM rAjAonI samudrathI vIMTaLAyelI pRthvInI mekhalA-kaDIonuM milana-tIrtha chuM. huM AjJA-siddha chuM. arthAt huM je Adeza A te siddha thAya ja. are, huM siddha sArasvata chuM!" huM ane rANA, vahelI savAre snAna karI, zuddha zveta vastra dhAraNa karI, dhara baMdha karI zrI RSabhaprAsAdamAM gayAM. vidhipUrvaka prAsAdamAM praveza karI, prabhune bhAvapUrvaka praNAma karI, traNa pradakSiNA ApI prabhunI samakSa hAtha joDI natamastake UbhAM rahyAM. huM je pramANe darzana-vaMdana karuM e ja rIte teo paNa karatA hatA. mayaNA 153 For Private And Personal Use Only

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prabhudarzanathI emanA mukha para prasannatA pragaTI hatI. ame prabhunI stavanA karI, jinAlayamAMthI bahAra nIkaLI pauSadhazALAmAM vidhipUrvaka praveza karyo. gurudeva padmAsanamAM dhyAnalIna hatA. emanA tejasvI mukhamaMDala para apUrva zAMtinuM AbhA-valaya prasArita hatuM. ame nava hAtha dUra UbhAM rahI dhImA svare "natthaNAvaM" bolyAM. temaNe dRSTi kholI. amArI sAme joyuM. mArA hRdayamAM to janma-janmAMtaramAM saMcita koI apUrva prItinuM pUra UbharAyuM... ane mArI AMkhomAMthI avirata azrudhArA vahevA lAgI. jANe ke mArI anAtha banI gayelI cetanAne AdhAra-Azraya maLI gayo! ame baMne gurudevanI nikaTa gayAM. ame baMne emanAM caraNomAM paDIne rudana karavA lAgyAM... mArA mukhethI eka kAvya sarI paDyuM - jyAM dRSTi paDI tyAM dANa dava ne kAna paDyo kolAhala, aphasosa munIzvara, kahuM zuM tamane eka sapanuM muja roLAI gayuM... re jiMdagIbhara bhramaNAmAM bhaTakI ne eka ghaDI evI UgI ke kaMcana che ke kathIra e spaSTapaNe jovAI gayuM... meM TIpuM TIpuM saMcIne mAMDa bharI pIyUSanI gAgara, tyAM eka dhaDAko ne paLamAM pIyUSa badhuM DhoLAI gayuM.. dIsatAM' to udyAna aMdhAre te raNa nIkaLyAM ajavAsa thatAM huM kone kahuM? hasavA mathatA A haiyAthI rovAI gayuM.. mayaNA! AyuSyamatI! tuM AvI gaI? huM tamArA baMnenI ja pratIkSA karI rahyo hato. tArA A patinA kuSTharoganuM nivAraNa karavA, sarvajJabhASita graMthomAMthI eka viziSTa yaMtra zodhyuM che. e yaMtranI vidhipUrvaka ArAdhanA karavAthI 154 apaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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avazya A puNyazALI puruSa nIrogI banaze. mayaNA, tuM to jinamatanI jJAtA che. tuM jANe che amArA zramaNonA AcAra-vicAra. amArAthI gRhastho mATe auSadhopacAra ke maMtra-taMtra-yaMtranA prayogo na batAvAya. paraMtu tAro A pati bhaviSyamAM jinadharmano udyota karanAra banavAno che. A puruSa jinazAsananI mahAmUlyavAna saMpadA che. A mahApuruSa dvArA sarvajJa zAsananI deza-videzamAM zAna vadhavAnI che. A uttama puruSano apUrva abhyadaya thavAno che, eTale meM zAstronuM parizIlana karI siddhacakra mahAmaMtra" uddhata karyuM che. A mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA tamAre baMnee karavAnI che. te mATe tamAre kSamAzIla rahevAnuM che. indriyone zAMta rAkhavAnI che. nava divasa sudhI AraMbha-samAraMbha karavAnA nathI. bane eTaluM mauna rahevAnuM che. to ja A mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA thaI zakaze. meM hAtha joDI, mastaka namAvI kahyuM : "gurudeva, ApanI AjJA mujaba ame mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA karIzuM. Apa amane e mahAyaMtra ApavAnI kRpA karo ane kyArathI ane kevI rIte enI ArAdhanA karavAnI che, e samajAvavAnI kRpA karo." AcAryadeve potAnI sAme eka kASThanA bAjoTha para tAmrapatra para Alekhita yaMtrane mUkyuM. mayaNAne saMbodhIne gurudeve yaMtrane samajAvavAno prAraMbha karyo : bhadra! A siddhacakra mahAmaMtra che. A yaMtranA madhyabhAgamAM aSTadala-kamala hoya che. te kamaLanI karNikAmAM "OM hrIM' maMtra bIja sAthe arihaMta paramAtmAno jApa ane dhyAna karavAnuM che. "OM' mokSabIja che, "hrIM' mAyAbIja che. e pUrvadalamAM siddhapadanuM, dakSiNadalamAM AcAryapadanuM, pazcimadalamAM upAdhyAyapadanuM, uttaradalamAM sAdhupadanuM, agnikhUNAmAM darzanapadanuM, naiRtya khUNAmAM jJAnapadanuM, vAyavya khUNAmAM cAritrapadanuM ane IzAna khUNAmAM tapapadanuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. dareka padano jApa "OM hrIM' sAthe karavAno hoya che. A aSTadalakamala, mahAmaMtranuM paheluM valaya kahevAya. bIjuM valaya soLa pAMkhaDInuM hoya che. temAM eka-eka dalanA aMtare prayA 15 For Private And Personal Use Only

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aSTavarganuM - (----d--4-) dhyAna karavAnuM che. khAlI rahelAM ATha dalomAM "OM namo rihaMta'nuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. trIjA valayamAM ATha dizA-vidizAomAM ATha 'anAhata'nuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. be-be dalanA aMtare be-be labdhipadonI sthApanA karavAnI. ema prathama paMktimAM 16 labdhipada Ave. evI rIte bIjI ane trIjI paMktimAM paNa 16-16 labdhipada Ave. dareka labdhipadanI sAthe "OM hrIM marda no nA' pada bolavAnuM. tyAra pachI yaMtrapIThathI labdhiparyata mAyAbIja (hrIM ) vaDe traNa rekhAothI cAreya bAju vekhana karavAnuM. tenI paridhimAM ATha gurupAdukAnI sthApanA karavAnI ane tene namaskAra karavAnA. cothI aDadhI rekhAnA aMte "' lakhavAnuM. cAreya dizAomAM "jayA' vagere cAra devIonI sthApanA karavAnI ane vidizAomAM jaMbhA Adi devIonI sthApanA karavAnI. tyAra pachI kaLazAkAra yaMtranA uparanA bhAgamAM zrI vimalavAhana Adi adhiSThAyaka devo tathA cakrezvarI vagere devIonI sthApanA karIne temanuM maMtrapado dvArA dhyAna karavAnuM che. 17 vidyAdevIonI, gomukha vagere 24 zAsanadevonI, cakrezvarI Adi 24 zAsanadevIonI sthApanA karavAnI. yaMtrakaLazanI nIce mULa sthAne sUrya vagere 9 grahonI sthApanA karavAnI. gaLAnA bhAge "naisarSika' Adi navanidhinI sthApanA karI, enA maMtrAkSarothI dhyAna karavAnuM. te pachI daza dipAlonI ane cAra varonI sthApanA karavAnI. he puNyazAlinI, A siddhacakra mahAmaMtra vidyAnuvAda' nAmanA dazamAM pUrvamAMthI uddhata kareluM che. A parama rahasyabhUta yaMtra che. enI ArAdhanA karavAthI kevA viziSTa lAbha ArAdhakane prApta thAya che, te tame baMne ekAgra citte sAMbhaLo : A vidhipUrvaka A mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA karanAra ArAdhaka potAnuM vAMchita sukha prApta kare che. dhanano arthI dhana pAme che. padano cAhaka padavI meLave che. strInI icchAvALI strI meLave che ane putranI kAmanAvALAne putra maLe che. 153 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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jene saubhAgya joIe tene saubhAgya maLe che. jene mAna-sanmAna joIe tene mAna-sanmAna maLe che. jene rAjyanA mahAmaMtrI banavuM che te mahAmaMtrI bane che. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mahAna samRddhi prApta thAya che. rUpa ane lAvaNya maLe che. viSaprayoga maTe che, tIvra tAva maTe che, kuSTharoga maTe che. aDhAreya prakAranA kuSTharoga dUra thAya che. 84 prakAranA vAyu-roga maTe che ane nahIM rujhAtA ghA rujhAI jAya che. * bhayaMkara bhagaMdara roga zAMta thAya che. jalodara maTI jAya che. vividha prakAranI vyAdhio ane jvara zAMta thaI jAya che. khAMsI, khasa, kSayaroga, AMkhanA roga, sannipAta vagere rogo nAza pAme che. * cora, bhUta, DAkaNo, zAkaNo satAvI zakatAM nathI. * masA-roga, pAThAM paDavAM, heDakI AvavI, zarIranAM aMga-upAMgamAM cheda paDavA, nAsura thavuM, peTanI pIDA, dAMtanI pIDA vagere pIDAo zAMta thAya che. tyAM sudhI ja vipattinI ghora nadI pAra nathI karI zakAtI ke jyAM sudhI siddhacakrarUpa kRpAbharapUra jahAjamAM beThA nathI! * tyAM sudhI ja baMdhana che... tyAM sudhI ja kleza che, jyAM sudhI AdarapUrvaka zrI siddhacakranuM smaraNa nathI karyuM. * A mahAyaMtranA prabhAvathI strIone vaidhavya nathI AvatuM, khoTAM kalaMka nathI AvatAM ke bAlavaidhavya nathI AvatuM. * A siddhacakranA ArAdhanathI he mayaNA! vikalatA, durbhAgya, kurUpatA, dAsIpaNuM vagere dUra thAya che. * bhaktipUrvaka manuSyo je kaMI sukha icche te badhuM emane maLe che. paraMtu te mATe te kSamAzIla joIe, jitendriya joIe, zAMta-upazAMta joIe, nirmaLa brahmacArI joIe ane vikArarahita cittavALo joIe. mamaNA * je manuSya siddhacakranuM ArAdhana kare che teNe jinazAsananI ArAdhanA karI kahevAya. kAraNa ke jinazAsanano sAra hoya to siddhacakra che! he mayaNA, jinAgamomAM siddhacakranAM nava pado sivAya bIjuM kaMI nathI, mATe e nava padane jANavAnAM che ne emanuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. huM tamane baMnene nave pado samajAvIza. For Private And Personal Use Only 157

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Shri Mahavir Jain Aradhana Kendra // www.kobatirth.org kAraNa ke atyAra sudhI je anaMta AtmAo mokSamAM gayA che ane je javAnA che; vartamAnamAM je mokSamAM jaI rahyA che te aharniza A navapadamaya siddhacakranI samyag ArAdhanAthI ja jaI rahyA che. mana-vacana-kAyAnI zuddhi joIe! A zuddhi sAthe A nava padamAMthI ekAda padanI ArAdhanA manuSya kare to viziSTa sukha-saMpatti ane padapratiSThA maLe che. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mana-vacana-kAyAnI zuddhi sAthe pahelA padanI (arihaMta) ArAdhanA karIne devapAla vagere zreSTha mAnavasukha pAmyA hatA, to kArtika vagere daivI sukha 158 pAmyA hatA. bIjA siddhapadanI ArAdhanA karIne pAMca pAMDavo mAtA kuMtI sAthe siddhAcala para mukti pAmyA hatA. trIjA AcAryapadanI ArAdhanA karIne nAstika rAjA pradezI marIne devalokamAM deva thayo hato. * cothA upAdhyAyapadanI ArAdhanA karIne AcArya siMhagirinA ziSyo jJAna prApta karIne kRtArtha thaI gayA hatA. pAMcamA sAdhupadanI ArAdhanA karIne rukmiNI sukhI thaI, virAdhanA karIne rohiNI duHkhI thaI. chaThThA darzanapadanI ArAdhanA karIne zrIkRSNa ane rAjA zreNika vagere kSAyika samakitarUpe prazaMsApAtra banyA hatA. bhaviSyamAM teo tIrthaMkara thavAnA che. * sAtamuM jJAnapada ArAdhIne zIlamatI mahAna prajJAvatI banI hatI. AThamA cAritrapadanI ArAdhanA karIne jaMbUkumAra vagere hajAro strIpuruSo muktine varyAM che. * navamA tapapadanI ArAdhanA karIne vIramatI nAmanI mahAsatI zreSTha puNyaphaLa pAmI hatI. * he bhadre! he mayaNA! vizeSa zuM kahuM? A mahAyaMtranA samyag ArAdhanathI manuSya 'tIrthaMkara nAmakarma paNa bAMdhI zake che. 'bhagavaMta, amAre kyArathI A ArAdhanAno prAraMbha karavAno?' For Private And Personal Use Only mANA

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'vatsa, Aso mahinAnI zuklA saptamIthI prAraMbha karavAno che. sAtamathI pUnama sudhI AyaMbilanuM tapa karavAnuM. * e nava divasa A mahAyaMtranuM-aSTaprakArI pUjana karavAnuM. nave nava divasa nirmaLa brahmacaryanuM pAlana karavAnuM. * roja tamane eka eka pada samajAvIza, te pramANe jApa ane dhyAna karavAnuM. tamAre A badhI ja ArAdhanA tamArA gharamAM ja gupta rIte karavAnI che. pahelA ja divasathI A tArA patino roga dUra thavA lAgaze. ArAdhanAno pratyakSa anubhava thaze. tamAre baMnee khUba ja zAMtithI ArAdhanA karavAnI che. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mayaNA, tAre tArA A vanavAsI patine khUba vAtsalyabhAvathI pAse besADIne pUjana... jApa... dhyAna karAvavAnuM che.' 'he rANA! tame mayaNA kahe tema karazo ne?" mANA temaNe hasatA mukhe hA pADI. gurudevane saMtoSa thayo. gurudeve mane maMtra ApyuM. zuddha vastramAM pariveSTana karI ame yaMtra lIdhuM. gurudevane vaMdana karI ame amArA nivAsa tarapha cAlI nIkaLyAM. For Private And Personal Use Only 159

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24 170 Aja Aso mahinAnI zuklA saptamI hatI. chaThanI rAtre ame baMnee savAre vahelA UThI javAnuM nakkI karyuM hatuM. pahelAM huM jAgI gaI hatI. thoDI ja vAramAM temanA mukhamAMthI 'RRSamAya nama:' no asphuTa dhvani anAyAsa ja pragaTa thayo. temaNe AMkho kholI, mArI sAme joyuM. huM AnaMdavibhora hatI. UThIne paheluM kAma snAnAdithI paravAravAnuM hatuM. lalitA AvI gaI hatI. bAjunA nAnA paNa suMdara khaMDamAM cAMdInA bAjoTha upara bhagavAna RSabhadevanI ratnapratimA padharAvI hatI ane enI AgaLa bIjA evA ja maNijaDita bAjoTha para siddhacakra yaMtra sthApita karyuM hatuM. enI pAse ja aSTaprakArI pUjAnI sAmagrI mUkI hatI. khaMDa dhUpathI suvAsita hato. amAre baMnene pUjAmAM besavA mATe lalitAe zveta UnanAM Asano pAtharI dIdhAM hatAM. badhuM ja vyavasthita goThavI lalitAe amane pUjAmAM besI javAno saMketa Apyo. e gharanI bahAra dvAranI pAse jaIne besI gaI. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir ame baMne khUba prasannacitta hatAM. amAruM hRdaya harSathI pulakita hatuM. ame paramAtmAnI stuti karI. pachI siddhacakranI stuti karI : sakala maMgala parama kamalA keli maMjula maMdira bhavakoTi saMcita pApanAzana no navapada jayakara, arihaMta-siddha-sUrIza-vAcaka, sAdhu-darzana sukhakaruM, vara jJAna pada cAritra tapa e namo navapada jayakare ... zrI siddhacakra pasAya saMkaTa ApadA nAse save, vaLI vistare sukha manovAMchita, namo navapada jayakaruM... stuti karyA pachI, pahelAM bhagavaMtanI aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. te pachI siddhacakra mahAyaMtranI paNa aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. tyAra pachI bhaktipUrvaka bhAvapUjA karI ane arihaMtapadano mananI ekAgratApUrvaka jApa karyo. AyaMbila-tapanuM paccakkhANa lIdhuM ane te pachI huM UbhI thaI, caNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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paramAtmAnA tathA siddhacakra mahAmaMtranA abhiSekanuM pANI khobAmAM laI meM rANA upara chAMTayuM. temanI AMkho baMdha thaI gaI. temane samAdhi lAgI gaI. meM madhyamasUre maMtragAna zarU karyuM : OM hrIM namo arihaMtANaM OM hrIM namo siddhANaM OM hrIM namo AyariyANaM OM hrI namo uvajjhAyANaM OM hrI~ namo loesavvasAhUNaM OM hrIM zrI siddhacakrAya namaH tyArabAda "zrI siddhava ta6 namAmi' lokapaMktinuM vAraMvAra gAna karavA mAMDyuM. lagabhaga eka ghaTikA (24 miniTa) paryata huM A gAna karatI rahI ane temaNe AMkho kholI. be hAtha joDyA. prabhunA caraNe ane mahAyaMtranA caraNe praNAma karyA. pachI mArI sAme hAtha joDIne bolyA: devI! mane je zarIranI aMdara baLatarA thatI hatI, pIDA thatI hatI, te zAMta thaI gaI che. he bhagavatI! A bhagavAna RSabhadevano ane A gurudeve ApelA siddhacakra mahAmaMtrano prabhAva che ane vizeSa rUpe to tamArI zraddhAnuM A paheluM puSpa khIlyuM che! tamane praNAma!" are mArA nAtha, prabhunI samakSa Ama mArA guNa na gavAya..." gavAya. prabhu ja kahe che ke uttama strI-puruSonA guNa sarvatra gavAya. tArA upakArone to koI janamamAM nahIM bhUlI zakAya. ame AratI utArIne pUjanavidhi pUrI karI hatI. lalitAne bolAvIne enA mastake paNa prabhunuM abhiSeka-jala chAMTyuM. ame khaMDanI bahAra nIkaLyAM. ame lalitAne ghara bhaLAvIne jinamaMdire tathA pauSadhazALAe javA nIkaLyAM. e ja pUjananAM zveta vastro paherelAM hatAM. pahelAM jinamaMdiramAM jaI prabhunAM darzana-vaMdana-pUjana karyA. Aje arihaMtapada'nI ArAdhanAno pahelo divasa hato eTale khUba ja ullAsathI prabhunI bhAva-stavanA karI : mayaNA 11 For Private And Personal Use Only

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utAro karmono bhAra jinavara, utAro karmono bhAra. prANa re paMkheruM jhUre pAMjare kholo ne enAM dvAra.... jinavara 0 utAro vedanAnA bhAra ne AkuLa uranA othAra... kuNAM re kiraNo jJAnaprakAzanAM pragaTAvo teja phuvAra... jinavara 0 Avo re jinavara duHkha vAratA haratA jaDatAno bhAra sukhanAM sarjana karI sAcalAM relatA amarata-dhAra... jinavara 0 ame vidhipUrvaka pauSadhazALAmAM praveza karyo. pUjya gurudeva pAse zramaNa beThA hatA. temano vArtAlApa cAlato hato. ame vaMdanA karI. kuzaLapRcchA karI. gurudeve jamaNo hAtha UMco karI "dharmalAbha"nA AzIrvAda ApyA. tame nizcita samaye AvI gayAM cho." gurudeva bolyA. "prabho! ApanA mArgadarzana mujaba vahelI savAre ame baMnee zrI siddhacakra mahAyaMtranI aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. maMtrajApa karyo ane zrI arihaMtapadanuM dhyAna karyuM. gurudeva, have ApanA zrImukhe arihaMtapadano mahimA sAMbhaLavAnI icchA che. A uMbararANA) to dharmakSetramAM sAva navA ja che eTale ApanA mukhe zravaNa karavAthI emano AtmA vizeSa jJAnaprakAza pAmI zakaze." pUjya gurudeve khUba saraLa bhASAmAM teo (rANA) samajI zake evI zailImAM pahelA "arihaMtapadrane samajAvavAno prAraMbha karyo. "he mahAnubhAva! Aje "rihaMta'nuM dhyAna karavAno divasa che. dhyAna karatAM pahelAM jemanuM dhyAna karavAnuM hoya temanI oLakhANa karavI joIe. e oLakhANathI emanA pratye evo rAga-anurAga hRdayamAM pragaTa thaI jAya ke ApaNe temanI sAme joIe ke temanA dhyAnamAM magna thaI jaIe. jemanA para khUba anurAga hoya temanAmAM sahaja rIte lIna banI javAya che. A 162 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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che premanI parAkASThA. te parAkASThA maunamAM pariName che. arihaMta paramAtmAnI sArI ane sAcI oLakha thAya eTale emanA pratye premanAM pUra UmaTe. pachI emanA dhyAnamAM tanmaya banI javAya." paramAtmA arihaMtano prabhAva, emano mahimA anaMta che. ApaNI kalpanAzakti sImita che. sImita kalpanAthI anaMta-apAra mahimA kema karatAM samajAya? te chatAM thoDIka vAtothI arihaMta paramAtmAno paricaya karAvuM chuM. A saMsAra eka bhayaMkara aTavI che, jaMgala che. temAMthI ApaNe pasAra thaI rahyA chIe. jaMgalamAM koI rAjamArga nathI ke koI pagadaMDI paNa nathI. AvI aTavImAM koI mArgadarzaka joIe. koI bhomiyo joIe ke je ApaNane mokSa sudhI, ziddhazIlA sudhI pahoMcADI de! arihaMta paramAtmA ja evA pathapradarzaka che, bhomiyo che ke jeo mokSamArga batAve che. "mokSa' eTale acala... akSaya... anaMta.... avyAbAdha sthAna. e sthAne pahoMcavAno mArga batAve che. mokSa eTale jyAM parama sukha ane parama zAMti che, tyAM javAno mArga batAve che. mArga batAvanAranuM mahattva te samaje che ke je jANe che : "huM bhUlo paDyo chuM..." jene rasto jaDato na hoya. jene jaMgalanAM hiMsaka pazuono bhaya lAgato hoya. ApaNe kharekhara cauda rAjalokamaya vizALatama vizvanA araNyamAM bhUlA paDelA chIe. ApaNe mokSamArge caDhavA bebAkaLA banIe. mArgadarzakane pokArIe to arihaMta paramAtmA maLI jAya. ApaNe temane mArgadarzakarUpe oLakhIe. teo parama karuNAvaMta che. teo mokSamArga cIMdhanArA che, eTaluM ja nahIM, teo mArgamAM jIvone - ApaNane sAtha Ape che mATe teo "sArthavAha" che! sAtha Ape te sArthavAha kahevAya. arihaMta paramAtmA A bhayAnaka bhavanA jaMgalamAM ApaNane sathavAro Ape che. mArganuM jJAna to Ape ja che, sAtha paNa Ape che. jaMgalanA mArgamAM pArAvAra muzkelIo AvI zake, DAku-lUMTArA AkramaNa karI zake, jaMgalI pazuo paNa dhasI Ave, te vakhate sArthavAha ApaNI rakSA kare che. hA, ApaNe sArthavAhanI sAthe cAlavuM joIe. tame bhUmimArge musApharI nathI karatA, samudramArge yAtrA karo cho. saMsArane sAgara kahevAmAM paNa Avyo che. sAgaramAM tophAna Ave. nAvaDI-jahAja mANA 163 For Private And Personal Use Only

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UchaLe. temAM besanArA musApharo gabharAI jAya. "zuM thaze? nAva DUbI jaze to?" tyAre kuzaLa nAvika yAtrikone dharapata Ape che : "ciMtA nA karo. huM nAvane DUbavA nahIM dauM. hA, tame nAvamAMthI sAgaramAM kudI nA paDatA. game tevI AMdhI Ave ke game tevuM tophAna Ave, to ya huM tamArI rakSA karIza." je arihaMtanA zaraNe rahe che tene arihaMta DUbavA detA nathI. kAraNa ke teo bhavasAgaramAM taratI ApaNI jIvananaiyAnA kuzaLa nAvika che! bhUmimArge bhavajaMgalamAMthI pasAra thatA ApaNA teo "mahAgopa che', eTale ke rakhevALa' che. saMsAramAM Adhi-vyAdhi-upAdhi, janma-jarA-mRtyu vagere jaMgalI pazuo che. e pazuothI bacAvanAra eka mAtra mahAnagopamahAgovALa arihaMta paramAtmA che. jema govALa eka bAju Ubho rahI, potAnA pazuo tarapha najara pheravato pazuonI rakSA kare che, tevI rIte arihaMta ApaNI rakSA kare che. hA, ApaNe temanI AjJA mAnavI joIe, pazuo jema govALanI AjJA mAne che tema! ApaNe icchatA hoIe ke arihaMta paramAtmA amArI rakSA kare', to teo jarUra rakSA kare che. A rIte 'rihaMta' paramAtmA mahAgopa-mahAgovALa che, A mahAna nAvika che, A mahAna sArthavAha che, A mahAna mArgadarzaka che. A oLakhANa "paramAtmA kevI rIte jIvonA upakArI che', e dRSTithI karAvI. have arihaMta paramAtmAnA viziSTa guNavaibhava dvArA emanI oLakhANa karAvuM chuM. arihaMta paramAtmA rAgavijetA che', A emanI pahelI ane advitIya vizeSatA che. rAga traNa prakAranA hoya che : kAmarAga, sneharAga ane dRSTirAga. zabda, rUpa, rasa, gaMdha ane sparzano rAga e kAmarAga kahevAya. koI vyakti pratyeno rAga hoya te sneharAga kahevAya. pota-potAnA dharma-darzanano rAga hoya te dRSTirAga kahevAya. A traNeya prakAranA rAga prazasta (sArA) ane aprazasta (narasA) be 164 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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prakAranA hoya che. eka puNyakarma baMdhAve, bIjo pApakarma baMdhAve. arihaMta paramAtmA A baMne prakAranA rAgathI mukta hoya che, arthAt rAgavijetA hoya che. evI rIte paramAtmA 'SavijetA hoya che. teo prazasta dveSa nathI karatA, aprazasta haiSa paNa nathI karatA. arthAt teo kyAreya krodha nathI karatA, kyAreya mAna-abhimAna nathI karatA. nathI jIvo pratye dveSa karatA, nathI jaDa dravyo pratye dveSa karatA. na pApo pratye dveSa, na puNya para rAga. arihaMta paramAtmA indriyavijetA hoya che. jema ApaNane pAMca indriyo che tema arihaMta paramAtmAne paNa pAMca indriyo hoya. indriyonA be prakAra hoya che : dravyandriya ane bhAvendriya, pudgalamaya jaDa indriya dravyandriya kahevAya. AtmapariNAmarUpa indriya bhAvendriya kahevAya. "arihaMta' paramAtmA baMne prakArI indriyonA vijetA hoya che. ApaNe ApaNI pAMceya indriyothI zabda, rUpa, rasa, gaMdha ane sparzanA asaMkhya viSayono bodha ane bhoga karIe chIe. indriyo sAthe mana joDAyeluM hoya che. AtmA, mana ane indriyo dvArA pAMceya prakAranA asaMkhya viSayomAM bhaTakyA kare che ane ghora pApakarma bAMdhe che. ApaNe indriyonA dAsa chIe. jo ApaNe indriyo para vijaya meLavavo hoya to arihaMtanuM dhyAna indriyavijetArUpe karavuM joIe. paramAtmA arihaMta pariSahavijetA hoya che. 22 prakAranAM kaSTo te 22 pariSaha. sAdhupuruSa samatAbhAve A 22 pariSaho sahana kare. bhUkha, tarasa, garamI, ThaMDI, DAMsa-macchara vagere kaSTone arihaMta sahajabhAve svIkAre evA arihaMtanuM pariSahavijetArUpe dhyAna karavAthI ApaNAmAM paNa kaSTo samatAbhAve sahana karavAnI zakti pragaTe. arihaMta paramAtmA upasarga-vijetA hoya che. upasarga eTale saMkaTaApatti-upadrava. devo taraphathI, manuSyo taraphathI ane pazu-pakSIo taraphathI AvA upasarga thatA hoya che, evA upasargo thAya tyAre arihaMta paramAtmA meruparvatanI jema aDaga, nirbhaya ane nizcala rahe che. A rIte arihaMtanuM upasarga-vijetArUpe dhyAna karavAthI ApaNAmAM paNa kaSTo sahavAnI zakti pragaTe che. A rIte ApaNe arihaMta paramAtmAnI guNAtmaka oLakhANa karI. have mayaNA 195 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #175
emanA "tIrthaMkaranAmakarmanA udayathI emano je prabhAva pragaTe che, puNyakarmano utkRSTa udaya Ave che tyAre emanI AsapAsanI sRSTi kevI sarjAya che, eno paricaya karAvuM chuM. "tIrthaMkara nAmakarmanA udayathI arihaMta paramAtmAne ATha prakAranI zobhA prApta thAya che. devo "samavasaraNa'nI racanA kare che. temAM arihaMta besIne dharmadazanA Ape che. samavasaraNamAM vizALa azokavRkSanI chAyA patharAyelI hoya che. prabhunI upara traNa chatra hoya che. prabhunA mastakanI pAchaLa dedIpyamAna bhAmaMDala hoya che. prabhu ratnajaDita siMhAsana para birAjamAna hoya che. be bAju UbhA UbhA deva cAmara DhALe che. AkAzamAMthI devo puSpavRSTi kare che, duMdubhi vagADe che ane divya dhvani kare che. adUbhuta vAtAvaraNa sarjAya che. prabhunI divya mahimAvALI vANI varase che. devo, manuSyo, pazu-pakSIo sahu potapotAnI bhASAmAM arihaMta prabhuno upadeza sAMbhaLe che ne samaje che. samavasaraNamAM ATha prakAranI zobhA sAthe arihaMta paramAtmAnuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. evI ja rIte arihaMtanuM dhyAna cAra atizayothI paNa karavAnuM che. e prabhunuM jJAna anaMta hoya che. lokAlokavyApI hoya che. Ane jJAnAtizaya' kahevAya. * arihaMtanAM vacano - temanI vANI dareka jIva potapotAnI bhASAmAM samaje, Ane "vacanAtizaya' kahevAya. ja deva-devendro ane rAjA-mahArAjAo vagere badhA ja zreSTha loko arihaMtanI pUjA kare che, Ane "pUjAtizaya' kahevAya. arihaMta prabhu jyAM jyAM vicare tyAM tyAM AsapAsa roga-mArI-marakI vagere dUra thaI jAya. Ane "apAyAparama atizayakahevAya. ane chelle arihaMta prabhunI eka vizeSa oLakhANa karAvuM teo bhayavijetA hoya che! paramAtmAne koI bhaya na hoya. emane koIno ya bhaya na hoya. eTaluM ja nahIM, emanA zaraNe rahenAra paNa bhayavijetA bane! mATe tame baMne pati-patnI 163 ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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'namo jiNANaM jiabhayANaM' maMtrano jApa karatA rahezo. tame paNa to bhayavijetA banazo! hRdayakamalamAM kamalanI karNikAmAM-madhyabhAgamAM arihaMta padanuM A rIte zvetavarNamAM dhyAna karavAnuM che. AjanI rAta "arihaMta'nA dhyAnamAM vyatIta thAo! gurudeve arihaMtapadanuM varNana pUrNa karyuM. ame harSita manathI ne mukhathI vaMdana karI ghara tarapha cAlyAM. mANA 167 For Private And Personal Use Only

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(25 se. ame ghera AvIne AyaMbila karyuM. lalitAe bhAta rAMdhIne taiyAra rAkhyA hatA. eka ja dhAnyanuM ame AyaMbila karyuM hatuM. temane (rANAne) AyaMbila sArI rIte thayuM hatuM. AyaMbila karyA pachI emaNe, je je vAto gurudeve kahelI samajANI na hatI, te mane pUchavA lAgyA. meM premathI emanA prazno sAMbhaLyA ane khUba ja sneha-sahAnubhUtithI uttaro ApyA. kAraNa ke meM ghaNAM ghaNAM zAstronuM adhyayana kareluM hatuM. pUjya AcAryadeve paNa mane bhaNAvelI ane mahApaMDita subuddhie paNa mane jJAna ApeluM hatuM. mArA pitA ane guru, baMne kahetA ke huM viduSI chuM. jJAnapipAsu chuM. huM bahu jaladI aneka zAstromAM pAraMgata thaI gaI hatI. gaNita, saMgIta, citrakaLA, pAkakaLA, kAvyaracanA, dharmazAstro... vagere ghaNI vidyAomAM nipuNa thaI hatI. kAvya lakhavAnI dhUna paNa mane hatI. paramAtmAnA maMdiramAM to sahaja rIte kAvya phuratAM rahetAM. nRtyamAM to mArI pUrA dezamAM zreSThatA hatI. paNa meM kyAreya rAjasabhAmAM nRtya nathI karyuM. paramAtmAnA maMdiramAM ja nRtya karatI. chatAM dharmagraMtho ne adhyAtmazAstro aMge mAre pUjya gurudeva sAthe vArtAlApa thato. teo mArI zaMkAonuM sarasa samAdhAna karatA. eka divasa to jarA akaLAIne pUjya gurudevane pUchI beThI hatI : "sRSTinA badhA graMtho, badhAM zAstronuM jJAna pAmavA AjIvana paryApta na hoya to mANasa zo upAya kare ?' gurudeva hasI paDyA. 'tAruM nAma mayaNA nahIM paNa tRSNA vadhu yogya hota! bhadra, tRSNA duHkha denArI hoya che, paraMtu jJAnanI tRSNA AnaMdamayI hoya che. eka janmamAM to zuM, hajAra janmomAM ya nathI chipAtI! jJAnapAna karatA raho, tRSA vadhAre prabaLa thatI jaze. tRSNA na rahe to jJAnaprAptino mArga baMdha thaI jAya!'' meM harSathI pUchyuM : "Apa pAsethI ane paMDitajI subuddhi pAsethI ghaNA 138 mayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

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graMtho bhaNI... have karyo graMtha bhaNuM?' gurudeva hasIne bolyA : 'jJAnanA mATe graMtho ochA che? A vizALa vizva to graMthAgAra che. A sRSTimAM jIvANuothI mAMDIne graha-nakSatro sudhI badhA enA eka-eka graMtha che! eka-eka caitanya sAthenI paLapaLanI anubhUti e graMthanAM pAnAM che. jIvananI pratyeka anubhUti adhyayanano viSaya che. bAkI to huM subhage! jyAre AtmA avadhijJAnI, mana:paryavajJAnI ke kevaLajJAnI banaze tyAre ja jIvananI zreSThatama jJAnasaMpadA prApta thaze.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir gurudeva jANe tyAre mArA bhaviSyanuM sAcuM varNana karI gayA hatA. huM aneka kalpanAo karatI hatI... e kalpanAone kAryomAM gUMthIne tRpti pAmatI hatI. mANA AjanI ja kevI anubhUti che! zuM AjanuM paramAtmapUjana, siddhacakra mahAyaMtranuM pUjana... gurudeve kaheluM samajAveluM zrI arihaMta paramAtmAnuM svarUpa... AyaMbilanuM tapa... ane A mArA bhartAranA nirdoSa prazno... mArA hRdaya parathI kadIya nahIM bhUMsAya evI A anubhUti aMkita thaI gaI che. saMdhyA samaye ame amArA ja gharamAM birAjamAna karelA prabhunI samakSa ane siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI samakSa AratI utArI. prabhunI stavanA karI. (zaMga : AzAvarI) Atama! arihaMtanAM gIta gAvo. Atama! bhagavaMtanAM gIta gAvo. jApa japo arihaMta taNo sau aMtaranA eka tAre, karma TaLe, sahu sukha maLe ne, Utaro zivanA kinAre, Atama! arihaMta uramAM vasAvo... puruSomAM uttama ne siMha, puMDarika gaMdhahastI, lokamAM uttama, lokanA nAtha, hitakArI brahmamastI... Atama! arihaMta zaraNe jAvo... dIpaka sama ne udyotakArI, abhaya-nayananA dAtA, mArga batAve, bodhi Ape, zaraNAgatanA trAtA. Atama! arihaMtapUjA racAvo... Atama 7 For Private And Personal Use Only 139

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dharmanA dAtA dezaka-nAyaka, sArathi suMdara sohe cakravartI jina dharmatIrthanA, nirakhata jana-mana mohe, Atama! arihaMta-zAsana gAvo.. Atama 0 kevaLajJAna ne kevaLadarzana, dhAraka tAraka devA anubhava pragaTe aMtaramAM abhedabhAve sevA Atama! arihaMta guNa-gaNa bhAvo.... Atama 0 rAta UtarI AvI hatI. lalitA enA ghare cAlI gaI hatI. ene meM sAvadhAna karI hatI ke ahIMnI koI paNa vAta enA gharamAM nahIM karavAnI ke bIjA koIne ya nahIM karavAnI. ArAdhanAnI guptatA jaLavAvI atyaMta jarUrI hatI. have gharamAM ame be ja hatAM. ame sAmasAme beThAM hatAM. acAnaka temanI AMkho AMsubhInI thaI gaI. mArI sAme joIne temaNe kahyuM : devI, A pRthvI para manuSya ja sauthI vadhu duHkha pAme che. kAraNa ke sukhamAM DUbIne ya te duHkha ApattinI AzaMkA karato rahe che. du:khamAM DUbelA hoya tyAre keTalAka loko sukhanI kalpanA kare che. hA, duHkhamAM ja sukha chupAyeluM rahe che...' meM kahyuM : "tamArI sAcI vAta che. tamArI AMkhanAM AMsu ene ja sAbita kare che. tamArAM A azrubiMduonuM mUlya paNa vadhI jAya che. kAraNa ke A AMsa UgatA sUryanAM siMdurI kiraNone pratibiMbita kare che! tamArA mukhanI zobhA vadhAre che. sUryakiraNo pote mahimAmaya banI jAya che. jIvanamAM AMsunuM ya mUlya che. duHkhanI pAchaLa sukha lapAyuM che. je banavAnuM che te to banaze ja. mATe sukhanI kSaNomAM AnaMda mANI levo!! ame vAto karatAM karatAM nidrAdhIna thayAM. bIjA divase brAhmamuhUrtamAM huM jAgI gaI. paMcaparameSThInuM smaraNa karI, emanA jAgavAnI rAha jovA lAgI. huM AtmasmaraNamAM lIna banI. huM koNa chuM? huM kyAMthI AvI chuM ? kaI gatimAM jaIza?ahIM huM kayo puruSArtha karI rahI chuM? 170 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #180
mane kevuM paramAtmatattva maLyuM che? mane kevA saguru maLyA che? A badhuM ciMtana karatAM karatAM aruNodaya thaI gayo. teo jAgyA. jAgatAM ja "85madhevAya nama:' bolIne mArI sAme joI iSat hasyA. tyAM daravAje TakorA paDyA. meM daravAjo kholyo. sAme lalitA UbhI hatI... mane bheTI ja paDI. pachI mArA pagamAM paDI gaI. meM ene be hAthe pakaDIne UbhI karI. tene kaMI bolavuM hatuM paNa bolI nahIM, sIdhI e gharamAM cAlI gaI. kAraNa ke ene pUjananI badhI taiyArI karavAnI hatI. huM ane teo - ame snAnAdithI paravAryA. pUjAkhaMDamAM pravezyAM. lalitAe lagabhaga badhI taiyArI karI dIdhI hatI. ame pahelAM paramAtmAnI aSTaprakArI pUjA karI, pachI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI pUjA karI. Aje siddhapadanI ArAdhanA karavAnI hatI. ame "OM hrIM zrI sibhyo namaH svAhA' maMtrano jApa karavA mAMDyA. meM emane siddha bhagavaMtanI sAmAnya kalpanA ApI hatI. lAla raMgamAM siddhapadanuM dhyAna karavAnuM samajAvyuM hatuM. ame baMne jApa-dhyAnamAM lIna banyAM. dhIre dhIre teone dhyAnasamAdhi lAgI gaI. huM temanI pAse besIne madhyama svare "OM hrIM zrI siddheyo nakara vAhano maMtrajApa karavA lAgI. eka ghaDI sudhI temanI samAdhi rahI. temanA mukha parathI kuSTharoganA DAgha dUra thaI gayA. pachI dhIre dhIre temaNe AMkho kholI. mArA zarIre harSano romAMca thayo. meM snAtrajala kaLazamAMthI laIne emanA zarIra para chAMTyuM. dhIre dhIre emanA hAtha-paga uparanA kuSTharoganA DAgha dUra thaI gayA. jANe ke navI cAmaDI AvI gaI. ame bhAvapUjAmAM pravRtta thayAM. siddha bhagavaMtanI stavanA zarU karI : (: AzAvarI) gAvo siddha taNA guNagAna pragaTe, pUrA AtamabhAna.. gAvo 0. ATha karmane bhasma karIne, nija svarUpa suhAyA, ATha guNo pragaTyA AtamanA, anupama vaibhava pAyA, banavuM siddhaguNamAM gulatAna... gAvo 0 zivapuramAM zubha sthAna jamAyA, zuddha sphaTikamaya zilA, mayaNa 171 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #181
tyAMthI koI pAchuM na Ave, koI nahIM tyAM lIlA... tyAM to jJAna-amRtanAM pAna... gAvo 0 jJAna anaMtuM, vIrya anaMd, darzana paNa tyAM anaMta, sukha anatuM, kSAyika samakita, zivaramaNInA kaMta, pAmyA akSayapadanAM dAna.. gAvo 0. anaMta avagAhanA siddhanI re, acala arUpI zuddha, nirAkAra niraMjana gAvo, e che Atamabuddha, e to cidAnaMda bhagavAna.... gAvo 0 siddhacakranA bIjA padamAM siddha taNA guNa gAyA, paramAnaMda Ulase aMtaramAM lAgI siddhanI mAyA, jAgyuM! Aje Atama jJAna... gAvo 0 lalitAne ghauMnA AyaMbilanI taiyArI karavAnuM kahIne ame zrI RSabhaprAsAdamAM gayAM, paramAtmAnAM darzana-pUjana karI sIdhAM pauSadhazALAmAM pahoMcI gayAM. gurudevane vidhipUrvaka vaMdanA karI yogya sthAne besI gayAM. gurudeve "dharmalAbha' AzIrvAda ApI amane amArI ArAdhanA aMge pRcchA karI. gaIkAlanI ane Aja savAranI pUjA vagerenI vAta karI. gurudeva! ApanI parama kRpAthI emanA mukha parathI ane hAtha-paga uparathI roganAM cihno maTI gayAM! jevuM emanA para snAtrala chAMTayuM ke tarata ja cAmaDIno raMga badalAvA lAgyo! zarIranI aMdaranI baLatarA to gaI kAle ja zAMta thaI gaI hatI. eTale ghaNA samaya pachI emane gADha nidrA AvI! A badho Apano prabhAva che, gurudeva!' mAro prabhAva nathI subhage, A prabhAva zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtrano che. haju enA ghaNA ghaNA prabhAvo tame anubhavazo. jinadharmanI ArAdhanAmAM ane prabhAvanAmAM tamane siddhacakra-mahAyaMtra khUba ja sahAyaka banaze. have Aje mAre tamane siddhapadano paricaya karAvavAno che. mayaNA! tuM to navatattvomAM mokSatattvane samajelI che, paraMtu A puNyazALI rAjAne siddhapada samajAvavuM che. pachI tuM paNa emane siddhapadanI... mokSanI... vAta karaje." 'gurudeva! gaI kAle paNa tenI sAthe arihaMtapadanI vAto karI hatI. have temano jJAnAvaraNIya karmano sAro kSayopazama thayo hoya ema lAge che.' 172 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #182
mayaNA, kema bhUlI jAya che? paramAtmA RSabhadevano rAjA para kevo divya anugraha thayo che? pachI zuM bAkI rahe?" gurudeve snehabharI dRSTithI emanI sAme joyuM. teo zaramAI gayA. temaNe be hAtha joDI mastaka namAvyuM. have huM siddhapada samajAvuM chuM. ekAgra manathI sAMbhaLajo. je AtmA potAnA para lAgelAM ATheya prakAranAM karmono nAza kare che te AtmA "siddha' kahevAya che. ATha prakAranAM karmonAM nAma A pramANe che : jJAnAvaraNIya, darzanAvaraNIya, mohanIya, aMtarAya. nAma, gotra, AyuSya ane vedanIya. AmAM pahelAM cAra "ghAtI karmo kahevAya. pachInAM cAra "aghAtI karmo kahevAya. A ATha karmonA kSayathI AtmAnA mULabhUta ATha guNo pragaTa thAya che : 1. jJAnAvaraNIya karmanA kSayathI anaMta jJAna pragaTe. 2. darzanAvaraNIya karmanA kSayathI anaMta darzana pragaTe. 3. mohanIya karmanA kSayathI vItarAgatA pragaTe. 4, aMtarAya karmanA kSayathI anaMta vIrya pragaTe. 5. nAmakarmanA kSayathI AtmA arUpI bane. 6. gotrakarmanA kSayathI AtmA agurulaghu bane. 7. AyuSyakarmanA kSayathI AtmA akSaya sthiti prApta kare. 8. vedanIyakarmanA kSayathI avyAbAdha sukha prApta thAya. siddha bhagavaMto anaMtajJAna ane anaMtadarzanathI bAhya ane AMtarika samagra vizvane arthAtu lokane ane alokane pratyakSa jue che te jANe che! e ja emano parama AnaMda hoya che. vizvanA yathArtha darzana ane yathArtha jJAnamAMthI apUrva AnaMda anubhavAya che. e AnaMdanuM varNana zabdomAM na thaI zake. jo ke muktAtmAnA sukhanuM varNana karavuM ja zakya nathI, chatAM "namo siddhApa'no jApa karanArAone siddhonA sukhanI kalpanA ghaNI gamatI hoya che. mukta-siddha AtmAnA zreSTha sukhane traNa vizeSaNa ApavAmAM AvyAM cheH (1) sAdi-anaMta, (2) anupama, ane (3) avyAbAdha. (1) mukta-siddhi AtmAnuM sukha prAraMbhavALuM hoya che. enA sukhanI mayA 173 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #183
zarUAta hoya che. tenuM sukha anAdi nathI hotuM. sarve karmono kSaya thAya che tyAre AtmAmAM sukha pragaTa thAya che. mATe tene "sAdi' kahevAya. sAdi che ne anaMta che. siddhanA sukhano kyAreya aMta Avato nathI. siddha AtmAnuM sukha anaMta ja hoya. (2) bIjI vAta che anupama sukhanI. siddhonA sukhane koI upamA ApI zakAtI nathI. evI koI upamA ja nathI duniyAmAM ke kahI zakAya - "siddhanuM sukha AnA jevuM sukha che!" nA, koI upamA ja nathI. (3) trIjuM vizeSaNa che avyAbAdha. siddhonuM sukha bAdhArahita hoya che. pIDArahita hoya che. saMgharSa vinAnuM hoya che. jo amUrta AkAzane AghAta pahoMce to amUrta AtmAne AghAta pahoMce! siddhazilA para rahelA anaMta siddha bhagavaMtonuM koI paNa duHkha vinAnuM nirbheLa sukha hoya che. siddha bhagavaMtone "buddha' paNa kahevAya che. "pAraMgata' paNa kahevAya che. ajara', "amara" ane "asaMga' paNa kahevAya. >> 'buddha' eTale samagra vizvane jANanArA, >> 'pAraMgata' eTale saMsArano pAra pAmI gayelA. have pAchA emane saMsAramAM AvavAnuM ja nahIM. * "ajara' eTale "jarA"rahita. jarA eTale vRddhAvasthA. siddha bhagavaMta zarIrarahita hoya eTale vRddhAvasthA hoya ja nahIM. che, "amara'. siddha bhagavaMtone mRtyu nahIM. mRtyu zarIranuM hoya che. siddhone zarIra ja nathI hotuM eTale mRtyu na hoya. >> "asaMga'. siddha AtmAone koI pugalono saMga na hoya. emanI to Atmajyoti anaMta AtmajyatiomAM bhaLI gayelI hoya che. ApaNe evuM dhyAna karavAnuM ke ApaNI Atmajyoti paNa siddhazilA para jaIne tyAM anaMta AtmajyotimAM bhaLI jAya che! dhyAna ApaNA hRdayamAM karavAnuM che. hRdayamAM kamaLanI kalpanA karo. aSTadaLa kamaLanI kalpanA karo. "kamaLa'nI kalpanA arthapUrNa che. >> kamaLa jevuM komaLa hoya che, hRdaya tevuM komaLa joIe. * kamaLa jevuM nirlepa hoya che, hRdaya tevuM nirlepa joIe. je hRdayamAM siddhacakranuM dhyAna karavAnuM che, navapadonuM dhyAna karavAnuM che, te hRdaya 174 maNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #184
komaLa joIe. kaThora nahIM, kUra nahIM. kaThora hRdayathI ke hRdayamAM dhyAna na thaI zaka. krUra ane kaThora hRdaya sthira nathI banI zakatuM. te caMcaLa, asthira ane svastha hoya che. bIjI vAta che nirlepatAnI. kamaLa kAdava-kIcaDamAM utpanna thAya che, pANImAM te vadhe che, pachI kAdava ane pANIne choDI upara rahe che. kAdava ne pANIthI alipta rahe che. kamaLadala para pANI paDe ke nIce sarI jAya, tema hRdayane viSayanA vikalpo, viSayanI vAsanAo sparzatAM ja nIce sarI paDavI joIe. "hRdayakamaLa' para vAsanAonuM pANI Take nahIM, vikalponuM pANI Take nahIM. AvuM hRdayakamaLa navapadonuM nivAsasthAna bane che. vikalpo ane vAsanAo hRdayane apavitra karanArA che. asaMkhya vikalpavAsanAothI malina banelA hRdayamAM navapadanuM dhyAna na thaI zake. hRdayakamaLamAM navapadonuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. e mATe tamane 'kamaLanI kalpanA karatAM AvaDavI jaIe. AMkho baMdha karo. khIleluM kamaLa juo. dhIme dhIme kamaLane najIka lAvo. hRdaya pAse lAvo. pachI e kamaLa hRdayamAM goThavAI jAya... tame tamArA hRdayane ja kamaLarUpe juo. vacce karNikA ane enI ATha pAMkhaDIo. A siddha bhagavaMto cauda rAjalokanA agrabhAge AvelI siddhazilA para avasthita hoya che. rAjA! tamane mayaNA cauda rAjalokanuM svarUpa samajAvaze. tenA agra bhAge 45 lAkha yojana pahoLI siddhazilA rahelI che. te siddhonI bhUmi che. tenAM judAMjudya nAmo che : iSatprAgubhArA, mukti, siddhi, mukyAlaya, siddhAlaya, lokAgrA vagere. A siddhonI bhUmi zaMkhacUrNa jevI vimala che. ja mRNAla, caMdrIkaraNa, tuSAra, gokIra jevI zveta-dhavala ujjavala hoya che. A samagra pRthvI zveta-suvarNa jevI hoya che. * nirmaLa che, niSpaka che, darzanIya che, prAsAdika che, zubha che ane sukhapradA mahAnubhAva! audArika, taijasa ane kArpaNa - A traNa zarIrathI mukta thayelo ane janma-jarA-mRtyuthI mukta thayelo AtmA A siddhabhUmi para, siddhakSetra para pahoMcI jAya che. mayA 15 For Private And Personal Use Only

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gurudeve siddhapadanuM varNana pUrNa karI mane kahyuM : "he bhadra! siddhapadanuM dhyAna karavA mATe siddhonuM ATaluM svarUpajJAna paryApta che. tamArI tattvacarcAmAM A aMge tuM rANAne te te vAto samajAvavAno prayatna karaje . vizeSarUpe to siddhonuM lAla raMgamAM ekAgra dhyAna karavAnuM che. manane eka padmAsanastha siddhanI AkRtimAM sthira karI devAnuM che. prayatna karajo.' ame gurudevane vaMdanA karI, UbhAM thayAM. anya munivarone vaMdanA karI, pauSadhazALAnI bahAra nIkaLyAM. ghare AvyAM. lalitAe sasmita amAruM svAgata karyuM. ame eka dhAnyanuM (ghaunuM) AyaMbila karyuM. lalitAe kahyuM : mayaNA! mArI icchA thAya che ke huM paNa AyaMbila karuM!' bhale, navamA divase AyaMbila karaje! basa?' AyaMbila karIne temaNe be ghaDI vizrAma karyo. temane khUba sArI nidrA AvI gaI. jyAre teo jAgyA tyAre khUba praphullita lAgatA hatA. huM vicAravA lAgI : dareka mANasanA jIvanamAM asthira paLo Ave che, paNa lakSya hoya che sthiratA, zAMti ane paripUrNatA. have mArA jIvanamAM sthiratA AvatI hoya ema mane lAgatuM hatuM. zrI siddhacakra mahAmaMtra mArA hRdayamAM sthira thaI rahyuM hatuM. teo bolyA : "zuM vicAramAM DUbI gayAM, devI!' zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtrano vicAra - eno prabhAva...' huM bolI. adUbhuta che eno prabhAva! have A jIvanamAM koI paLa evI nahIM hoya ke huM ene bhUlI zakIza! teo gadgad thaI gayA. pachI to siddhapada aMge emaNe ghaNuM pUchayuM. temane samajAya e rIte uttara ApyA. temanA mukha para teja patharAyuM hatuM... saMtoSanuM ajavALu relAyuM hatuM. 176 ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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2che. amArA gharanI aTArImAM ame traNeya beThAM hatAM. huM, rANA ane rANAnI mAtA kamalaprabhA - mArAM sAsu. huM amAro vRttAMta saMbhaLAvatI hatI. dUra kSitija najIka vizALa gagananI nIlimA hariyALI dharatIne godamAM samAvatI mane dekhAtI hatI. citta prasanna hatuM. huM pavana jevI haLavI phUla banI gaI hatI. AsapAsa bhAvi jIvananAM sukhasvapnanAM valayo vaNAtAM jatAM hatAM. samasta jagata maMdira jevuM prasanna ane pavitra bhAsatuM hatuM. meM mArI sAsu kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : "mAtAjI! ame bIjuM AyaMbila paNa sukhapUrvaka karyuM. madhyAhnakALathI saMdhyA samaya sudhI siddhapada aMge huM emane samajAvatI rahI. saMdhyAkAlIna prabhupUjana ane siddhacakrapUjana karyA pachI ame amArA zayanakhaMDamAM gayAM. lalitA gharanuM badhuM kAma patAvIne enA ghera gaI. temaNe mane kahyuM : "Aje to mAre tamArA jIvananI koI romAMcaka ghaTanA sAMbhaLavI che!" huM temanA sAme joI rahI. temanA suMdara mukha para snehanI rekhAo aMkita thaI hatI. meM mArA bhUtakALamAM DUbakI mArI. mArI jalakrIDAno prasaMga yAda Avyo. ame traNa sakhIo - huM, lalitA ane chAyA - eka divasa kSiprAnA taTa para gayAM hatAM. kSiprAmAM pANInAM pUra AvyAM hatAM. paNa pUra osarI rahyAM hatAM. chAyAe jalakrIDAnI taiyArI karavA mAMDI. huM gabharAtI hatI. meM kahyuM : "chAyA! zuM pUramAM jalakrIDA thaI zake?' chAyAe nirbhayatA dekhADIne kahyuM : "bIka zAnI? A nadI UMDI nathI. pravAha paNa vegIlo nathI. kadAca vahAvI deze to paNa bhagavAna tane bacAvI leze.. ke pelo rAja kumAra.. je tArA mRtyu samaye AvI pahoMcyo hato huM khijAI gaI. kahyuM : "basa, basa kara chAyA! tArI kalpanAzakti to mayaNA 177 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #187
nadInI dhArA karatAM ya vegavaMtI che.' paraMtu chAyA mAro hAtha pakaDIne jalapravAhamAM kheMcI gaI. pAchaLa pAchaLa lalitA paNa AvI gaI. saumya zItala kSiprAnAM jaLa zarIra ane mana, baMnene potAnA madhura sparzathI vIMTaLAI vaLyAM. huM duHkha, gabharATa ane abhimAna bhUlI gaI. hasatAM hasatAM traNeya sakhIoe ekabIjA para pANI uDADyuM. jalakrIDAmAM badhuM ja bhUlI gaI. lalitAe phUlanI eka DALa pANInA pravAhamAM pheMkIne kahyuM : "juo, A DALane pahelAM koNa pakaDI le che?' ame traNa taratAM DALa pakaDavA taratAM AgaLa vadhyAM. ame traNeya zora macAvatI utsAhamAM AvI gaI hatI. jalasotamAM huM keTalI AgaLa nIkaLI gaI, eno khyAla na rahyo. DALI kyAM gaI, e paNa joI zakI nahIM. jANe huM tarI zakatI na hatI, prayatna vagara nadInA pravAhamAM vahI rahI hatI. koNa jANe kyAM? sakhIo pAchaLa rahI gaI hatI. emano avAja paNa saMbhaLAto na hato. huM vahe jatI hatI. huM svapnamAM hatI ke jAgrata... e paNa jANI zakI na hatI. acAnaka mane thayuM : "ujjayinInI rAjakumArIne AvI caMcaLatA zobhA nathI detI. dhIramati sthiracitta mayaNAne A zuM thaI gayuM?' paristhiti mANasane keTalo asahAya karI de che, pachI mANasa paristhitine ya badalI nAkhe che. huM gati badalIne kinArA tarapha pAchA pharavAnuM vicAratI hatI, paNa tyAM sudhImAM bhUlI gaI ke mAruM potAnI jAta para niyaMtraNa ja nathI. deha avaza, zaktihIna thaI gayo hato. have bhAgyane pravAhanA bharose choDyA vinA bIjo koI upAya na hato. mRtyu nikaTa AvI rahyuM hatuM. koI paNa kSaNe vamaLamAM DUbI jaI zakatI hatI. sUryAstano raMga pazcimI AkAzane lAla karI rahyo hato. mArA jIvanano saMdhyAkALa thavA Avyo hoya, ema lAgatuM hatuM.... e kSaNe jIvana pratye tIvra moha pedA thaI gayo! mana kahetuM hatuM. baMne hAtha phelAvIne mane ja AliMgana daIne jaLa srotamAMthI kheMcI lauM! jIvana keTaluM suMdara che, keTaluM priya che! potAnuM jIvana keTaluM kAmya hoya che mAnavIne! manamAM ne manamAM vicAratI hatI... mAre mRtyuno zItaLa sparza karavo paDaze. huM AMkha mIMcIne susta paDI paDI vahetI hatI. lahero para taratA koI phUlanI jema hiloLAtI hatI. tyAM to sarayUjaLamAM saMdhyAsnAna karI 178 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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astAcaLe jatA sUryane praNAma karatA eka tejasvI tapasvIe mane joI. eka chalAMgamAM AgaLa vadhI mAruM bAvaDuM pakaDIne bahAra kheMcI. bhAna gumAvyuM e pahelAM mane lAgyuM ke koIno abhaya hAtha mane pANImAMthI bahAra kheMce che. zarIra acetana banIne taratuM hatuM. najIka AvelA mRtyuthI bacI gaI hatI. bhAna to AvyuM. huM kSiprAnA kinAre retImAM cattI paDI hatI. AMkha mIMcIne kaMIka vicAruM tyAM to kAna pAse dhImo avAja saMbhaLAyo : "ujjayinInI prajJAvaMta rAjakumArI! zA mATe AtmahatyA karatAM hatAM? zuM ochuM che emane? sAMjanA samaye chalakAtI kSiprAmAM kUdI paDyAM!" huM coMkI UThI, "kono avAja che A? koNa che A rUparAja tapasvI?" meM dhIre dhIre AMkho kholI.. sAme UbhA hatA rAjakumAra aridamana! kurudezanA rAjA damitArinA putra ane mArI bahena surasuMdarInA premI! huM lajjAsaMkocamAM DUbI gaI. dhIre dhIre UThavAno prayatna karyo. pITha para chUTTA vALa paNa bhAre lAgatA hatA. zarIra paranAM bhInAM vastra paNa lajita karatAM hatAM. aridamana mArI dazA samajI gayA. teo maitrIbharyA svare bolyA: 'tame thAkelAM cho. mArI dAsI asmitA ratha pAse UbhI che. tame rathamAM besI jAo. te tamane ujjayinI pahoMcADI deze." meM kahyuM : 'he rAja kumAra, jalakrIDA karatAM karatAM pUranA pravAhamAM taNAI gaI... A eka durghaTanA banI. ene AtmahatyA kahevI te anucita che. khera, tame mArA prANa bacAvyA che. bahu moTo upakAra karyo che. A upakAra huM kyAreya nahIM bhUluM, rAjakumAra!' huM rathamAM besIne ujjayinI AvI gaI hatI. A mArA jIvananI romAMcaka ghaTanA meM kahI!" teo vismaya, Azcarya ane praphullita vadane sAMbhaLI rahyA hatA. teo bolyA: 'e rAjakumAre, tamArA prANa bacAvyA! mahAna upakAra karyo.' hA, e pachI to enAM lagna rAjakumArI surasuMdarI sAthe mArA pitAe dhAmadhUmathI karAvI ApyAM hatAM." Aje Aso zukla navamIno divasa hato. zrI siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanAno trIjo divasa hato. Aje "AcAryapada ArAdhanA karavAnI yaNA 179 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #189
hatI ane pILA raMganA dhAnyanuM-caNAnuM AyaMbila ka2vAnuM hatuM. nityakrama mujaba lalitAe pUjAkhaMDamAM pUjananI badhI ja pUrvataiyArI karI dIdhI hatI. ame snAna karI, zuddha vastra paherI pUjAkhaMDamAM gayAM. vidhipUrvaka paramAtmAnI ane siddhacakrajInI aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. caityavaMdana karI, 'AcAryapadanI stavanA karI : Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir (rAga : vAgezvarI) AcAraja chatrIza guNadhArI... AcAraja0 pAMca indriyonA vazakArI, brahmavADa nava dhArI, cAra kaSAyo dU2 nivAryA, pAMca samiti pyArI... AcAraja0 traNa guptine dilamAM dhArI guNa che tArA bhArI, jJAnAdi AcAra-pracAraka, le bhavijanane ugArI... AcAraja0 adbhuta rUpa ne jJAna anupama, darzana zivasukhakArI, mohavijetA, netA munigaNanA, jinavANI lalakArI..AcAraja0 zrI siddhacakranA trIjA padamAM sohe zamadamakArI, aMtarapaTa anubhava pragaTyo banIe sau bhavapArI... AcAraja bhAvapUjA pUrNa thayA pachI 'OM rrIzrI sUrimyo namaH svAhA|' maMtrano jApa zarU karyo. pahelAM bolIne jApa karavA mAMDyo... pachI dhIre dhIre mAnasajApa zarU thayo. jApa karatAM karatAM teo (rANA) samAdhimAM lIna thaI gayA. huM emane madhyama svare maMtra saMbhaLAvatI rahI. lagabhaga eka ghaDI sudhI teo samAdhimAM rahyA. temaNe AMkho kholI. meM snAtrajaLa laI temanA saMpUrNa zarIra para chAMTyuM. teo bhAvavibhora banI gayA... temanA hAtha-paganI AMgaLInAM TeravAM... nakha vagere je kharI paDyAM hatAM, te AvI gayAM. AMgaLIo akhaMDa thaI gaI. suMdara gulAbI jhAMyavALA nakha AvI gayA. zarIranA koI bhAga para rogano DAdha na rahyo. ame pUjAkhaMDamAMthI amArA zayanakhaMDamAM AvyAM. tyAM bhIMta para eka moTo arIso lAgelo hato. meM rANAne kahyuM : 'A arIsA sAme UbhA raho. tame tamArA zarIrane juo!' 180 teo arIsA sAme UbhA rahyA. potAnA pratibiMbane jotAM ja bolI UThyAM: 'A huM nathI... A huM nathI... devI...! huM to koDharogagrasta uMbararANo... A to koI rAjakumAra che!' For Private And Personal Use Only magaNA

Page #190
"nA nA, mArA nAtha, rAja kumAra nathI, rAjA che!' temanI AMkho harSAzruthI bharAI gaI hatI. teo bolyA : devI, gurudevanA A upakArano badalo kayA janamamAM vALI zakAze?" huM gadgad hatI. bhAvAtirekathI avAk thaI gaI hatI. emane jotI ja rahI... jinamaMdiramAM prabhune darzana-pUjana karI ame pauSadhazALAmAM gayAM. gurudevane vaMdanA karI, kuzaLapRcchA karI, yogya jagyAe besI gayAM. gurudeve amArI ArAdhanAno vRttAMta paDyo. rANAnA deha tarapha joyuM. samagra deha para dRSTi pharI vaLI. teo bolyA : bahu ja sarasa! zrI siddhacakra-mahAmaMtrano prabhAva adbhuta che. Aje trIjA ja divase rAjAno deha nIrogI banI gayo! have kramazaH pratidina deha puSTa banaze ane tejasvI banaze! devakumAra jevuM rUpa dhAraNa karaze.' 'gurudeva! Apa vacanasiddha mahApuruSa cho. ApanAM vacano acUka phaLe che ne phaLaze. Apano amArA para parama upakAra che. Apa akAraNa upakArI cho. karuNAnA sAgara cho. prabho! Aje amane AcAryapadano bodha ApI kRtArtha karo." gurudeve 'AcAryapadanuM varNana zarU karyuM. he yazasvinI! AcArya cAra prakAranA batAvavAmAM AvyA che. (1) nAmaAcArya, (3) sthApanA-AcArya, (3) dravya-AcArya, ane (4) bhAvaAcArya. have A cAreya AcAryano saMkSipta paricaya karAvuM chuM. (1) nAma-AcArya : jenuM nAma ja mAtra AcArya hoya. rastA para pharatI vyaktinuM nAma chApI dIdhuM "AcArya!' aTaka banI gaI AcArya! jevI rIte bharavADanA chokarAnuM nAma "indra" pADI dIdhuM! harijananA chokarAnuM nAma hanumAna" pADI dIdhuM! A nAma-AcArya kahevAya. (2) sthApanA-AcArya : AcAryanI mUrti pratimAne sthApanA-AcArya kahevAya. (3) dravya-AcArya : je duniyAnA zilpazAstra, jyotiSazAstra, nyAyazAstra vagere vyAvahArika zAstronuM jJAna ApanArA. tevI rIte zALA mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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mahAzALAnA AcAryo, te dravyAcArya kahevAya (4) bhAva-AcArya : bhAva-AcArya jinazAsanamAM hoya ane jJAnAcAra Adi pAMca AcAro pALe ane paLAve. AcArya je pAMca AcAra pALepaLAve te "paMcAcAra' kahevAya. te paNa tamane thoDuMka samajAvI dauM. (1) jJAnAcAra : pote jJAna meLave, jJAnI bane ane bIjA AtmAone jJAnI banAve. jJAnaprApti mATe ane jJAnanI pariNati mATe ATha AcAronuM pAlana karavuM joIe : (1) kALanuM lakSa rAkhe. (2) vinaya kare. (3) bahumAna dhare. (4) upadhAna kare. (5) gurusamarpaNa kare. () sUtra-zuddhi jALave. (7) arthazuddhi jALave. (8) sutra-artha baMneno yathArtha svIkAra kare. AcArya A AcAro pALe ne ziSyo pAse paLAve. (2) darzanAcAra : samyagdarzananA AcAro svayaM AcArya pALe ane ziSyone paLAve. (1) jinezvara bhagavaMtanAM kathelAM tattvo pratye niHzaMka zraddhA hoya. (2) anya dharmo-mato tarapha AkarSaNa na joIe. (3) "A sAcuM ne te paNa sAcuM', evI athiratA na joIe. (4) mUDhatA na joIe. (5) satkAryonI anumodanA kare. (6) dharmamArge DhIlA paDelAone protsAhita kare. (7) AcArya svayaM zraddhAsaMpanna hoya ane bIjAone zraddhAvAna banAve. (8) tIrthaMkara paramAtmAnA sthApelA caturvidha saMgha (sAdhu-sAdhvI-zrAvakazrAvikA) pratye hRdayamAM vAtsalyabhAva dhAraNa kare. zaraNe AvelA manuSyone karuNAthI UMce caDhAve, temanA AtmAone nirmala-pavitra banAve. cAritrAcAra: pAMca samiti ane traNa gupti - A ATha che cAritranA AcAra. AcArya svayaM samiti-guptinuM pAlana kare ane ziSyo pAse karAve. mayaNA! tuM rAjAne samiti-guptinuM svarUpa samajAvaje. tapAcAra : bAhya tapa ane Adhyetara tapa ka6 prakAre che. AcArya svayaM tapamAM puruSArtha kare ane ziSyone puruSArtha karAve. anazana, UNodarI, vRttisaMkSepa, rasatyAga e kAyakleza tathA saMlInatA - A bAhya tapa che. prAyazcitta, dhyAna, vaiyAvacca, vinaya, kAyotsarga ane svAdhyAya - A cha prakArano abhyatara tapa che. vIryAcAra : jJAna-darzana-cAritra ane tapa - A cAreyamAM AcArya vIryane phorave. arthAt cAreya AcAromAM puruSArthazIla rahe, ALasa na kare, pramAda na kare. bIjAone paNa puruSArthamAM preraNA Ape. 182 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #192
AcArya bhagavaMtanAM Ama to ATha lakSaNo batAvavAmAM AvyAM che. te lakSaNo paNa samajAvI dauM. - paheluM lakSaNa che paMcAcAra pALavAnuM ne paLAvavAnuM. ja bIjuM lakSaNa che tIrthaMkaranI gerahAjarImAM AcArya tIrthakara samAna hoya. arthAt caturvidha saMghanA AdhArabhUta AcArya hoya. AcAryanuM sthAna A rIte ghaNuM mahAna che. javAbadArIbharyuM che. AcAryapada meLavavuM saraLa che paNa bhAva-AcArya banI rahevuM muzkela che. trIjuM lakSaNa che : AcArya caturvidha saMghane kuzaLa rAkhe. saMghanI kuzaLatAnI javAbadArI samaje. AcAryanI chAyAmAM saMgha nirbhaya ane nizcita rahI zake, cothuM lakSaNa hoya che-AcArya zrutajJAnamAM pAraMgata hoya. je kALe jeTaluM jJAna hoya temAM teo pAraMgata bane. jJAnanA baLathI jinazAsananI zAna vadhAre. koI paNa vAdI-pravAdI Ave to vAda-vivAda karavAmAM AcArya samartha hoya, vijayI bane. jinazAsanano vijayadhvaja pharakato rAkhe. che pAMcamuM lakSaNa che : AcArya paththaramAM paMkaja pedA kare! ziSya mUrkha hoya, ja Dabuddhino hoya chatAM AcArya evA munine jJAnI banAve, potAnA jJAnanA baLathI, vAtsalyathI ane karuNAthI kaMTALe nahIM. ajJAnIne jJAnI ane mUrkhane samajadAra banAve. cha chachuM lakSaNa che upadeza ApavAnuM. AcArya niraMtara dharmano upadeza Ape, thAkyA vinA jIvonA upakAra mATe Ape. AcArya jANe ke kevo jIva kevI rIte dharma pAme. kone kevo upadeza Apavo. upadeza devAmAM teo kuzaLa hoya. upadeza zravaNa karanAranI yogyatA teo mApI letA hoya. temanI vedhaka dRSTi manuSyanI AMtarayogyatA mApI le. sAtamuM lakSaNa che bhASAjJAnanuM. AcArya dezanI sarva bhASAo jANanArA hoya, dezanA je je pradezamAM jAya te te pradeza-bhASAmAM teo upadeza Ape, te te dezanA ziSyone paNa emanI bhASAmAM upadeza Ape. ane bhaNAve. je dezanI je bhASA hoya te dezamAM te bhASAmAM upadeza apAya to upadeza vadhu asarakAraka bane. mArA 183 For Private And Personal Use Only

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AThamuM lakSaNa che suMdaratAnuM! AcAryano deha suMdara ne prabhAvazALI joIe. AcAryanuM bAhya zArIrika rUpa paNa ghaNuM mahattvanuM hoya che. AcArya rUpavAna joIe. rUpavAnanI sAthe sAthe kuLavAna ane lakSaNavAna paNa joIe. AcAryanI pasaMdagI mATe A ATha vAto agatyanI che. AcAryapadanA dhyAnamAM eka pachI eka A ATha rUponuM-svarUponuM dhyAna karI zakAya. ciMtana-manana karI zakAya.' AcAryadeve varNana pUrNa karyuM. keTalIka vAto rANAne mAre samajAvavAnI bhalAmaNa karI. ame sarve munivarone vaMdana karI pauSadhazALAnI bahAra nIkaLyAM. 184 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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27 mane lalitAnuM tyAgamaya jIvana game che. enuM jIvana ane preraNA Ape che. kyAreka enA tarapha ApoApa mAthuM jhUkI jAya che. paNa lalitAne mArI bhakti nathI joItI; joIe che mArI maitrI ane mAruM sAMnidhya. lalitA tyAga ane udAratAnI mUrti che. lalitAe mArI maitrInuM AdarapUrvaka svAgata karyuM che. e samajaNI thayA pachI lagabhaga mArI pAse rahI che! kAraNa ke e mahAmAtya somadevanI lADakI putrI che! lalitAnAM saMyama, tyAga ane kartavyaparAyaNatAthI mane zakti maLatI hatI. koI koI vAra e mArI pAse potAnuM hRdaya kholatI. koI koI vAra potAnI adhUrI kAmanAnI vyathAnI vAta paNa karatI! paNa jANe e kAmanAo ane vAsanAothI bahu UMce gaI hatI. kAmanAonuM damana karyuM hatuM. vAsanAonuM zamana karyuM hatuM. mane ghaNI vAra lAgatuM ke jIvananI prakAzamaya bAju ja jANe lalitA che. enI sAthe mArI ghaniSThatA vadhatI gaI hatI. akAraNa rAja kumArI tarIkenuM abhimAna, ahaMkAra, krodha, adhikAra... ochAM thaI gayAM hatAM. lalitA pAse hamezAM huM nAnI banatI ne emAM ja mane saMtoSa thato. paNa lalitA potAnI ciraparicita udAratAmAM mahimAvaMta rahI. te kahetI : "sakhI, tuM mAlavadezamAM Adarza nArI che. AryAvartamAM Adarza rAja kumArI che. tArI pAsethI ghaNuM zIkhavAnuM che. hajAro varSa pachI paNa tAruM sAhasa, vairya, buddhimattA, spaSTavAditA, svAbhimAna, paramAtmaprema, pativratA... guruzraddhA.... karmasiddhAMtamAM niSThA... A badhuM nArIjAtino Adarza banI raheze. tArA pavitra sauMdaryamAM samagra puruSajAti tAruM Adhipatya svIkAre che. e kAraNe surasuMdarI manamAM ne manamAM tArI IrSyA kare che. karatI hatI." surasuMdarI mArI IrSyA karatI hatI?' mane enA pati aridamana yAda AvyA. emanuM zaurya ane pauruSa smRtimAM AvyuM. surasuMdarI emane varI hatI. meM lalitAne kahyuM : mANasA 185 For Private And Personal Use Only

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khera, have to e dUra pradezamAM cAlI gaI che...' lalitAe mane kahyuM : "sakhI, eka mAMgaNI karuM?' eka nahIM, be! be nahIM, cAra! mArI sakhI, tuM je mAge te tane ApuM. mArA prANa..." nA bA, nA, mAre tArA prANa na joIe ke tArA prANanAtha paNa na joIe! mAre joIe che tArI ArAdhanA! tuM je siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA kare che, mane paNa evI ArAdhanA karAva!" huM kSaNabhara vicAramAM paDI gaI. "mAre pUjya gurudevane pUchavuM joIe. teo jo anujJA Ape to lalitAne paNa ArAdhanA karAvI zakAya... mArI sakhI che. manamAM duHkhI che. bhale mAlavadezanA mahAmaMtrInI putrI che, paNa enuM ya svataMtra mana hoya ne! enI icchAo hoya, kAmanAo hoya. ane badhuM ja eNe mane dila kholIne kahyuM che." "zuM gaMbhIra vicAramAM paDI gaI?" lalitAe mAro hAtha pakaDI, mane vicAromAMthI jAgrata karI. lalitA, huM gurudevane kAle pUchI joIza. A mahAyaMtra che! eTale khUba ja prabhAvazALI che. gurudeve khAsa to rANA mATe ja ApyuM che. eTale gurudeva hA pADaze to tane paNa mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA karAvIza." paNa tuM zuM mAne che? gurudeva hA pADaze ne?" lalitA, A mahAjJAnI puruSano viSaya che. huM AmAM koI kalpanA nA karI zakuM. te chatAM upakArI karuNAvaMta gurudeva prAya: nA nahIM paDe...' lalitA rAjI thaI gaI. amane AyaMbila karAvyuM. rANAe vizrAma karyo. varSothI zArIrika baLatarAnA kAraNe emanI nidrA lagabhaga cAlI gaI hatI, paraMtu Aso zilA saptamIthI emane ghasaghasATa UMdha AvavA mAMDI hatI. kAraNa ke zarIranI aMdaranI baLatarA zAMta thaI gaI hatI. pachI to bahAranA roganAM ghA-gUmaDAM vagere maTI gayuM hatuM. zarIra saMpUrNa nIrogI banI gayuM hatuM. jyAre teo jAgyA tyAre sUrya astAcala tarapha DhaLI gayo hato. teo prasannacitta hatA. hasIne bolyA : "Aje to khUba UMgha AvI gaI! 186 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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'Ave ja. UMgha AvavI te nIrogI zarIranI nizAnI che. have Apa nIrogI banyA cho.' meM kahyuM. temano, mahAyaMtranA prabhAve AzAtAvedanIya karmano udaya nAza pAmyo hato. zAtAvedanIya karma udayamAM AvyuM hatuM. pApa karma dUra thayuM hatuM, puNya karma udayamAM AvyuM hatuM. jIvamAtranA jIvanamAM AvuM parAvartana cAlyA karatuM hoya che. kyAreka evuM ya bane ke manuSya janmathI mRtyu sudhI duHkha anubhave! pApakarmono ja udaya cAlyA kare ane evuM paNa bane ke jIvAtmA janmathI mRtyuparyaMta sukha anubhave! puNyakarmono ja udaya cAlyA kare. ane moTA bhAge evuM bane ke manuSya kyAreka sukha anubhave, kyAreka du:kha anubhave! keTalIka vAtomAM puNyano udaya cAlato hoya, keTalIka vArtAmAM pApa karmano udaya cAlato hoya! Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mArI vicArayAtrA cAlatI hatI, tyAM lalitAe AvIne kahyuM : 'devI, AratIno samaya thaI gayo che.' ame pUjAkhaMDamAM jaI AratI utArI. paramAtmAnI bhakti karI. lalitA enA ghera cAlI gaI. ame be amArA zayanakhaMDamAM pravezyA, khaMDanI bahAra khullI agAsI hatI. tyAM bhadrAsana mUkIne beThAM. dUra dUra kSiprA nadInuM vaheNa camakatuM hatuM. AkAzamAM candra UgI gayo hato. vAtAvaraNamAM zAMti hatI, nIravatA hatI. meM rANA sAme joI sasmita pUchyuM : 'nAtha, Apane ApanA 700 sAthI yAda Ave che?' roja yAda Ave che! e badhA to mArA prANa rakSaka che, upakArI che. emanA eTalA badhA upakAro che ke eno badalo huM kevI rIte vALIza... te huM samajI zakto nathI...' teo bhAvavibhora thaIne bolyA. temanI tajJatAnuM e hRdayasparzI kathana hatuM. mayaNA 'nAtha! ApaNe jarUra badalo vALIzuM! ApanI AvI uttama bhAvanA che, to jarUra e bhAvanA phaLIbhUta thaze! ApanI badhI ja icchAo zrI siddhacakrajInA prabhAvathI paripUrNa thaze.' pachI to temaNe varSonA araNyavAsanI ghaNI ghaNI vAto karI. mana bharIne vAto karI. meM khUba AturatAthI e badhI vAto sAMbhaLI, e vAtomAM emanAM audArya, parAkrama, paropakAritA Adi guNono mahimA jANavA maLyo. rAtrino bIjo prahara zarU thaI gayo hato. ame nidrAdhIna thavA amArA zayanakhaMDamAM pravezyAM. For Private And Personal Use Only 187

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nityakrama mujaba cothA divase ame UThIne snAnAdithI paravAryAM. lalitA AvI gaI hatI. badhI ja pUjanasAmagrI taiyAra karI dIdhI hatI. ame khUba tanmaya banIne prabhunI ane zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. Aje upAdhyAya padanI viziSTa ArAdhanA karavAnI hatI. meM bhAvastavanA zarU karI: vAcaka pAThaka adhyApaka e, aMga-upAMganA jANa re sahu praNamo jinamata pAniyA... caraNa-karaNane dhAraNa karatA zivapurapaMthe cAle, dhyAna niraMtara pAvana dharatA, Atamajyota prajALe (2) jJAnadIpakane e pragaTAve, guNaratnonI khANa re... sahuO ghora timira ajJAnanuM TALe, saMzaya sadhaLA cheke, uttama kuLa avataMsa salUNA, AzaMsA sau bhede (2) zivaMkara ne abhayaMkara e, saumya-zItala tasa vANa re... sahu deza-videzanI bhASA jANe, paMcAcAra pracAre, pUrNa pratibhA, labdhapratiSThA, pApa anaMta pakhALe (2) deza-kALa ne bhAvanA jJAtA, jJAnaprakAzI bhANa re... sahu sUtra-artha sau kaMThe dharatA, mAyAne parihAre, mAna nahIM, madhyastha sthavira e, tRSNAne paDakAre (2) aMtarapaTa para anubhava pragaTyo, ziSyonA e prANa re... sahu bhAvastavanA pUrNa thayA pachI 'OM hrIzrI upAdhyAyebhyo namaH ravAhA / ' maMtrano jApa zarU karyo. lIlA raMgamAM upAdhyAya bhagavaMtanuM dhyAna zarU karyuM. roja mujaba Aje paNa emane dhyAnamAM samAdhi lAgI gaI. huM emane maMtra saMbhaLAvatI rahI. eka ghaDI pachI emanI AMkho khUlI. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir huM UbhI thaI. kaLazamAM bhareluM snAtrajala emanA zarIra para chAMTyuM. temaNe romAMca anubhavyo. temanuM mukhakamala vikasita thaI gayuM. teoe potAnuM mastaka mahAyaMtra para mUkI dIdhuM... thoDI kSaNo uccatama bhAvomAM pasAra thaI. ame pUjAkhaMDamAMthI bahAra nIkaLI gayAM. 188 paramAtmamaMdiramAM darzana-pUjana karI ame samayasara gurudeva pAse pahoMcI gayAM. Aje gurudeva amane 'upAdhyAya pada'no paricaya ApavAnA hatA. ame jaIne gurudevane bhAvapUrvaka vaMdana karI, kuzaLa pRcchA karI. gurudeve For Private And Personal Use Only samaNA

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'dharmalAbha'no AzIrvAda ApyAM. ame vinayapUrvaka amArI jagAe besI gayAM. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir gurudeva 'upAdhyAya pada' samajAvavAno prAraMbha karyo : 'huM mahAnubhAva, jema tame arihaMtanA 12 guNa jANyA, siddhanA 8 guNa ane AcAryanA 36 guNa jANyA, tema upAdhyAyanA 25 guNa batAvavAmAM AvyA che.' 11 aMga (zAstra) + 12 upAMga (zAstro) + caraNasittarI-1 (ArAdhanAnI 70 vArtA) + 1 karaNasittarI (ArAdhanAnI 70 vAto) - 25 guNa. = agiyAra aMgazAstronAM nAma A pramANe che : (1) AcArAMga, (2) sUtrakRtAMga, (3) sthAnAMga, (4) samavAyAMga, (5) vyAkhyAprajJapti, (6) jJAtAdharmakathA, (7) upAsakadazA, (8) antakRddA, (9) anuttaropapAtika dazA, (10) praznavyAkaraNa, ane (11) vipAkasUtra. bAra upAMganAM nAma A pramANe che : (1) aupapAtika, (2) rAjapranIya, (3) jIvAbhigama, (4) prajJApanA, (5) sUryaprajJapti, (6) jaMbudbIpa-prajJapti, (7) candraprajJapti, (8) kalpikA, (9) kalpAvataMsikA, (10) puSpikA, (11) puSpacUlikA, (12) vRSNidazA. A zAstronAM nAma che. upAdhyAya A zAstronA jJAtA hoya. zramaNonA samudAyamAM upAdhyAyanuM sthAna mahattvapUrNa hoya che. AcAryane jo rAjAnA sthAne samajIe to upAdhyAyane yuvarAjanA sthAne samajavAnA che. jinazAsanamAM upAdhyAya pada ati mahattvanuM che. kAraNa ke A zAsanamAM samyagajJAnanI ArAdhanAne zreSTha sthAna ApavAmAM AveluM che. sAdhu-sAdhvI mATe dinarAtanA 24 kalAkamAM 15 kalAka jJAnArAdhanA mATe hoya che. Du kalAka nidrA mATe ane 3 kalAka AhAra-vihAra-nihAra (sthaMDila) mATe hoya che. mANA upAdhyAyanuM Adarza vyaktitva hoya che. bhavya vyaktitva hoya che. zramaNazramaNI samudAyane nirmaLa samyagujJAnanI ArAdhanA karAvavAnuM mahAna kartavya je mahAna puruSanA zire che te upAdhyAyanA uttama vyaktitvane jANo. teo, 1. aMga-upAMga-zAstrone bhaNAvavAmAM uMghata hoya che. 2. teo pApaparivarjaka hoya che. For Private And Personal Use Only 189

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3. teo dhyAnamAM lIna hoya che. 4. karmanAza karavAmAM udyamI hoya che. 5. teo AcArya padane yogya hoya che. A emanI pAMca viziSTatAo hoya che. mATe teo goravAha hoya che, upAdhyAyanI eka bahu mahattvanI vAta che! teo jJAnadAna ApatAM jarAya kaMTALatA nathI; jarAya thAkatA nathI! teonuM jIvana pramAda vinAnuM hoya che. bhAvakaruNAthI bharelA e mahApuruSa saraiva suyogya ziSyone jJAnAmRta pivaDAvatA rahe che. bhale ne jijJAsu ziSya rAtre bAra be vAge jaIne emane prazana pUche! premathI ne bharapUra vAtsalyathI javAba Ape che! AvA upAdhyAyanuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. bIjI vAta upAdhyAyanA pApamukta hovAnI che. teo to pApamukta hoya ja che, paraMtu emanA caraNa-zaraNe rahenArA jIvAtmAo paNa pApamukta bane che. A rIte, upAdhyAya pAponuM parimArjana karIne ziSyone nirmaLa-vimala banAve che. trIjI vAta dhyAnI hovAnI che. jJAnI puruSa dhyAnI banI zake. jJAna vinA dhyAna na thaI zake. na thaI zake dharmadhyAna ke na thaI zake zukladhyAna. upAdhyAyo dharmadhyAna to kare ja, sAthe sAthe viziSTa prakAranAM AtmadhyAna paNa karatA hoya che. kyAreka jinavacananuM rahasya pAmavA dhyAnamAM lIna banI rahasya meLave che. dhyAnane agni kahevAmAM Avyo che. dhyAnanA agnimAM anaMta karmo baLIne bhasma thaI jAya che. upAdhyAya A rIte vipula karmakSaya karI AtmabhAvane nirmaLa kare che. dhyAnanI ArAdhanA eka viziSTa koTinI ArAdhanA che. cothI vAta AcAryapada pAmavAnI yogyatAnI che. AvA upAdhyAya AcArya padane yogya bane che mATe temane yuvarAja kahevAmAM AvyA che. AcArya pada mATe jevI tevI yogyatA kAma na lAge. jinazAsanamAM AcAryanuM sthAna sarvoparI che. "tisthara samo sUra - AcArya tIrthaMkara samAna hoya che. tIrthaMkaradevanA abhAvamAM AcAryane tIrthaMkararUpa mAnavAnA che! paNa e sAmAnya AcArya nahIM, bhAva-AcAryane mAnavAnA. mahAna puNyazALI hoya temane mAnavAnA. je te AcArya tIrthakara samAna na kahevAya. have upAdhyAyanI oLakha sthavirarUpe karIe. 190 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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jinazAsanamAM traNa prakAranA sthavira hoya che. (1) vayasthavira : jeo uMmaramAM moTA hoya, vRddha hoya. (2) paryAyasthavira : jeo zramaNaparyAyamAM moTA hoya. (3) jJAnasthavira viziSTa jJAnI hoya. A vayasthavira paryAyasthavirane ane jJAnasthavirane vaMdana kare. jo jJAnasthavira paryAyasthavira paNa hoya to. jJAnasthavira dIkSAparyAyamAM nAnA hoya, chatAMya paryAyamAM moTA muni, emane vaMdana kare. jyAre jJAnasthavira pAsethI jJAna levAnuM hoya tyAre ja vaMdana kare. jJAnaviranuM jinazAsanamAM advitIya sthAna che. AvA upAdhyAyanuM Aje dhyAna karavAnuM che. "aSTadala kamala"nI kalpanA karo. karNikAnI nIcenI pAMkhaDImAM upAdhyAyanI AkRti juo. lIlAchama varNamAM emane juo. OM zrI na 3vAyAvi padathI emano jApa karo. upAdhyAyanuM bhAvanikSepathI dhyAna karavA, evI kalpanA karo ke "upAdhyAya aneka suvinIta ziSyone jJAnadAna ApI rahyA che. emanA mukha para adbhuta vAtsalya, apUrva karuNA ane parama prasannatA chavAyelAM che. ziSyo apramatta bhAve aMjali joDIne, saMbhramAdi bhAvo sAthe jJAnaprApti karI rahyA che. kyAreka temanA mukha para "adabhuta-rasa'nI rekhAo UpasI Ave che. kyAreka vairAgyarasanI gaMbhIratA chavAI jAya che, to kyAreka zAMtarasanI saumyatA mukha para taravare che!" basa, A dRzya, AMkho baMdha karIne joyA karo ane jApa karatA raho. "he viduSI! zrI upAdhyAyanA jApa ane enA dhvaninA prabhAvathI manuSya nIrogitA prApta kare che. paraMtu dhyAna lIlA raMgamAM karavuM joIe.' dhyAna mATe Asana ane mudrA paNa siddha karavAM joIe. padmAsana, siddhAsana ke sukhAsane besIne jApa-dhyAna karavAnAM che. Aje AyaMbila paNa lIlA dhAnyanuM (maganuM) karavAnuM che. icchAo ane vAsanAothI mana mukta raheze to ja zrI siddhacakrajInA dhyAnamAM tame lIna banI zakazo. gurudeve vivecana pUrNa karyuM. meM gurudevanI nikaTa jaIne lalitA mATe ArAdhanA aMge pUchyuM. gurudeve pUrNimAthI ene ArAdhanA ApavAnI anujJA ApI. mayaNA 191 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ki 28 phera eka divasa ApaNe ApaNI jiMdagInA vastra para najara pheravIzuM to lAgaze ke alaukika AMgaLInA saMsparzanA kAraNe ApaNe parama pitAnI preraNAne mUrtimaMta karI che. ApaNane e dhanya kSaNe bodha thaze ke premanI pIMchIthI koI paNa prakAranA DAghaDUdha, TapakAM ke dhAbAM vagaranI suMdara AkRti UpasI Ave che. e vakhate duniyA e citrane nahIM, paNa enA para mahAzaktie, paramazaktie karelI raMgapuravaNIne nihALaze ane tene eka suMdaratama sAMgopAMga citranuM darzana thaze! e jIvaMta citra mArA prANanAtha rAjAnuM! rANAnuM hatuM ! samI sAMje amArI maDhulI jevA gharanA khaMDamAM ame traNeya beThAM beThAM vAto karatAM hatAM. moTA bhAge huM ja bolatI hatI. mArAM sAsu utsukatAthI mArI vAto sAMbhaLatAM hatAM. temanA putra paNa khUba snehathI mArA tarapha joIne ekAgratAthI zravaNa karatA hatA. acAnaka teo bolyA : "he mArI mA! hatuM nahIM kaMI suMdara, hatuM nahIM sAruM lIdhuM jANI ANe hatuM je naThAruM. hatuM mArI pAse nahIM kaMI arpaNane lAyaka hatuM badhuM apUrNa ane avAcya paraMtu banAvyuM ANe jIvana mAruM rocaka! mArI tarapha aMgulInirdeza karIne bolyA : "paraMtu banAvyuM ANe jIvana mAruM rocaka!' mane ghaNuM Azcarya thayuM. emanA manamAM kAvyanI phuraNA thaI hatI. suMdara kAvyanI racanA thaI hatI. eka dhAnyanuM (maganuM) AyaMbila karIne pachI rojanA krama mujaba temaNe vAmakukSI karI hatI. huM ane lalitA vAte vaLagyAM hatAM. lalitA mATe 192 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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gurudeva mahAyaMtranI ArAdhanA karavAnI anujJA ApI hatI, tethI te harSita hatI, praphullita hatI. mAro upakAra mAnatI hatI. lalitAe mane bhadrAsana para besADI, pote jamIna para besI, mane dhImA svare pUchayuM : sakhI, eka vAta pUchavI che. tArI aMtaraMga vAta che paNa mAre jANavI che. tuM kahe to pUchuM!" pUcha!" rAjasabhAmAM jyAre mahArAjAe Akroza karIne tene uMbararANAne soMpI hatI tyAre tane, tArA manamAM zuM thayuM hatuM?' huM hasI paDI. bolI : "mArI priya sakhI, duHkha AvI paDe tyAre ApaNe emAM kaDavAza ane roSa umarIe to duHkha cAlu raheze ane vadhArAmAM kaTutA ane krodha kAyamanA mahemAna banI jaze. pachI paristhiti zarUAtanI pIDA karatAM vadhAre viSama lAgaze. ApaNA kaparA kALamAM prema, zAMti ane maitrIthI hRdayane chalakAvI daIe to AkhIye paristhiti Azcaryajanaka rIte badalAI jAya che! tuM pratyakSa joI rahI che. pitAjI mATe huM kyAre ya ghasAtuM bolI nathI. are, manamAM ya e upakArI tAta mATe azubha vicAryuM nathI! bAkI to lalitA, sukha ane duHkhanI A jugalabaMdhI vagara vRddha ke yuvAna, baMnenA jIvana UbaDakhAbaDa, azakta ane avikasita ja rahe che! vaLI, meM mArA mananuM samAdhAna zodhI lIdhuM hatuM. tethI je paristhiti UbhI thAya tenI sAthe panAro pADatAM AvaDI gayuM che! dilanI khaTaka khAmoza thaI gaI che. meM eka vAta pAkkI mAnI lIdhI che ke jIvanamAM je kaMI che te paramAtmatattva ne gurutattva che! enI hUMpha ane enuM zaraNa ja parama zAMti Ape che. paraMtu mayaNA! tArA jIvanamAM kevA aMdhakAramaya divaso AvyA? tArI AkarI tAvaNI thaI..." paraMtu A kasoTInA paDakhepaDakhe hAsya pragaTayuM ne? AnaMda pragaTyo ne? UjaLA divaso UgyA ne?' sAcI vAta che tArI, mayaNA! tArA jevI mane banAvI de ne! mane tArA vicAro... tAruM jIvana... tArI dharma-ArAdhanA... badhuM ja game che!' kAraNa ke tane huM gamuM chuM!' ame baMne hasI paDyAM. ne rANA jAgI gayA. mANA 193 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #203
huM ane lalitA emanI pAse jaIne UbhAM rahyAM. teo sasmita bolyA : tame beso. Aje mane eka khUba sAruM svapna AvyuM! tamane saMbhaLAvuM chuM." ame baMne nIce jamIna para besI gayAM. temaNe svapnakathana zarU karyuM : svapnamAM meM joyuM to jaMgalanI keDI para huM ane eka divya puruSa sAthe cAlI rahyA chIe. acAnaka AkAzamAMthI eka tejalisoTo Ave che. tenA prakAzamAM mArA jIvananA prasaMgo ane banI rahelI ghaTanAo sAkAra thayAM. pachI meM keDI para pAchA pharIne joyuM to be jaNanAM pagalAMnAM nizAna retI para aMkita hatAM. tyAra pachI aneka dazyo mAnasapaTa para sarakavA lAgyAM. jyAre jiMdagInA aMtima prasaMganuM citra pUruM thayuM tyAre meM retImAM paDelAM pagalAM para najara nAMkhI to eka taphAvata dekhAyo. mArI jiMdagInA keTalAka cokkasa mukAme pagalAMnA nizAnanI hAramALA ekasarakhI na hatI. kyAreka eka ja hAra dekhAtI hatI. sAthe sAthe meM joyuM to mArA jIvananA vasamAM, viparIta, vimAsaNabharyA, duHkhada ane kaparA kALa vakhate eka ja vyaktinAM - eTale ke mArAM ja pagalAM dekhAtAM hatAM. A jANIne huM to duHkhI-duHkhI thaI gayo. ane e divyapuruSane Akroza karI kahevA lAgyo : "he divyapuruSa! teM mane vacana ApyuM hatuM ke huM jo tane ekalAne ja anusaravAnuM nakkI karuM to pachI dareka vakhate tuM mArI sAthe ja hoIza. paraMtu Aje mane tArI vAtamAM vizvAsa na rahyo. kAraNa ke mArA jIvananA khUba ja kharAba samaye huM ekalo ane aTUlo hato. retI paranAM pagalAMnAM nizAna enI sAbitI che. mane samajAtuM nathI ke je vakhate mane tArI hAjarInI hajAra vAra jarUra hatI tyAre tuM mane tarachoDIne kema jato rahyo?" e divya puruSe zAMtithI ne svasthatAthI javAba Apyo ke "vatsa! mArA mahAmUlA bALaka! huM tane cAhuM chuM eTale kyAre ya tane choDIza nahIM. tArA tApanA ane tAvaNInA samayamAM tane eka ja vyaktinAM pagalAM dekhAyAM, kAraNa ke e samaye meM tane UMcakI lIdho hato!' huM bolI : "adUbhuta svapna che, mArA nAtha!' lalitA bolI : "koI devanI kRpA thaI ApanA para!' ane mArA manamAM phuraNA thaI : "e divya puruSa, zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranA adhiSThAyaka zrI vimalezvara deva ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #204
ja hovA joIe. he nAtha, tame dhanya banI gayA. temane vimalezvara devano jIvanaparyatano sAtha maLI gayo! Apa nirbhaya ne nizcita banI gayA! 'devI, zrI siddhacakrajI maLyA pachI jema mAruM tana nIrogI banyuM che tema mAruM mana paNa zAMta, nirbhaya ane viSAdarahita banyuM che.' rAtri amArI dharmadhyAnamAM pasAra thaI hatI. rAtrinA chellA praharamAM ja ame nidrAdhIna thayAM hatAM. savAre lalitA AvIne pUjA-sevAnI badhI taiyArI karI rahI hatI. Aje zrI siddhacakrajInA pAMcamA sAdhupadanI ArAdhanA karavAnI hatI. ame paramAtmAnI ane mahAyaMtranI aSTaprakArI pUjA karIne pachI bhAvastavanA zarU karI. sAdhupadanI stavanA karI. mIThI mIThI lAge che munivaranI dezanA jANe gaMgAnuM nIra re.. pApo pakhALe pApI taNAM sau pahoMcADe bhavane tIra re... nirvANayogo sAthe sauhAmaNA bhavanA bhogo sau lAge bihAmaNA paMca mahAvrata pALe raLiyAmaNA dhAre zramaNanAM cIra re... pApo, icchAkArAdi sAmAcArI sAcave, krodhAdi doSo temane nA pAlave sAvadya bhASA svane ya nA've.. kaSTo sahe thaI dhIra re... pApo0 aMtasiMhAsane gurune padharAve, AjJA gurunI dilamAM dharAve, svAdhyAya-dhyAne manane DolAve jIve jIvana thaI vIra re.. pApo, tyAgI tapasvI yogI aNagAra re bhikSu-zramaNa-RSi taratA saMsAra re, jinavara-zAsananA moMghA zaNagAra re... gAvuM banI sanUra re.. pApo, mANA 195 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #205
bhAvapUjA pUrNa karI, zyAmavarNamAM sAdhupadano jApa ane enuM dhyAna zarU karyuM. 'OM hrIM zrI sarvasAdhubhyo namaH svAhA / ' Aje be ghaDI sudhI ame jApa-dhyAna karyuM. te pachI temanA deha para snAtrajalano chaMTakAva karyo. teo bhAvavibhora banI "zrI siddhava tava8 namAmi' gAvA lAgyA. vAraMvAra gAvA lAgyA. UbhA thaIne nAcavA lAgyA. emane nAcatA joIne mArA pagamAM dhrujArI vyApI gaI ane nRtya zarU thaI gayuM. ghaNA divaso... mahinAo pachI huM nRtya karI rahI hatI. sAja na hatA; sAjIMdA na hatA... chatAM jANe koI adazya tAla mane saMbhaLAI rahyo hato... ne huM nAcI rahI hatI. teo besI gayA hatA. AMkho baMdha karI dhyAnamagna banyA hatA. Arja ame thoDAM moDA paDyAM hatAM. pUjya gurudeva amArI pratIkSA karI rahyA hatA. ame vaMdana karI moDA paDavAnuM kAraNa batAvyuM. gurudevanA mukha para prasannatA patharAI. teo bolyA : kalyANI! nRtyapUjA to zreSTha pUjA che! emAM AtmA paramAtmAmaya banI zake che. te Aje uttama pUjA karI." prabho! Aje pahelAM to teo nAcI UThyA hatA! emane nAcatA joIne mAruM nRtya zarU thaI gayuM hatuM gurudeve rANAnI pUjAnI upabRhaNA karI. gurudeve sAdhupadanI vivecanA zarU karI. Aje sAdhupadanI ArAdhanA karavAnI che. te mATe sAdhunuM bAhya-AMtarika svarUpa jANavuM joIe. vizeSa rUpe Aje sAdhunuM zyAmaraMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM che. te mATe sAdhunuM vAstavika kalpanAcitra emanA ra7 guNonA mAdhyamathI mAnasapaTa para aMkita karavuM joIe.' pahelAM tamane sAdhunA 27 guNo batAvI dauM. teoja pAMca mahAvratonuM pAlana kare che. A cha kAyanA jIvonI rakSA kare che. pAMca indriyo para vijaya vare che. A rAtribhojana nathI karatA. - lobha nathI rAkhatA. miyANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #206
* kSamAzIla rahe che. ka citta nirmaLa rAkhe che. vastra-pAtranI vizuddha rIte pratilekhanA kare che. * saMyamayogomAM pravRtta rahe che. azubha manoyoga, vacanayoga, kAyayoganA tyAgI hoya che. 22 pariSadone sahana kare che. samatAbhAve upasargo sahana kare che, he mahAnubhAva! gurudeve rANAne kahyuM : sAdhunA A badhA guNonuM vistRta varNana karIne mayaNA tamane samajAvaze. sAdhujIvananI ArAdhanAnuM A vizALa kSetra che. A ArAdhanA dvArA sAdhu potAnA AtmAne nirmaLa karatA rahe che. have sAdhunI bIjI rIte sattara prakAranA saMyamanI ArAdhanA paNa sarvajJa paramAtmAe batAvelI che. teo pAMca AzravothI virAma pAmelA hoya che. pAMca indriyono nigraha karanArA hoya che. cAra kaSAyo para vijaya meLavavA prayatna kare che. * mana-vacana-kAyAnA azubha yogothI virata hoya che. pUjya gurudeve mane kahyuM : "he bhadra! tuM rAjAne Azravo, indriyo, kaSAyo, mana-vacana-kAyAnA yogo vagere samajAvaje." avazya samajAvIza, gurudeva." hAtha joDIne AjJA svIkArI. gurudeve AgaLa vivecana karatAM kahyuM : have sAdhunI sAta prakAranI vizeSatAo batAvuM chuM ke jene sAdhu vizeSa rUpe pALe che. pahelI vAta che -viSayavirAganI, sAdhu pAMca indriyonA viSayo tarapha virakta hoya, ene rAga na hoya. bIjI vAta che-sAdhu lokasaMjJAnA tyAgI hoya. arthAt duniyAnA lokone khuza karavAnI icchA na rAkhe ke pravRtti na kare. teo to mokSamArgane ja anusare. trIjI vAta che-kSamAdi dazavidha dharmanA pAlananI. sAdhu kSamA, namratA, saraLatA Adi 10 guNone AtmasAt karatA jIve. teo mAna-apamAnane mayamA 197 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #207
sama gaNe. teo kaMcana ane kathIrane samAna mAne, koI gALa Ape to roSa na kare, koI mAna Ape to garva na kare. mAna ApanAra ne apamAna karanAra, baMne sAdhune mana samAna hoya. cothI vAta che-sahAyaka banavAnI. sAdhu svayaM AtmakalyANanI sAdhanA kare ane bIjAone ArAdhanAmAM sahAya kare. 'sahAya kare te sAdhu!' A sAdhujIvanano Adarza hoya. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir pAMcamI vAta che- guru-AjJAnA pAlananI. sAdhu guruAjJAnA pAlanamAM tatpara hoya. upakArI gurunA pratye hRdayamAM ahobhAva dhAraNa kare ane ucita kALe ucita gurusevA kare. chaThThI vAta che- mahAvratamaya saMyamajIvananA pAlananI. sAdhu potAnuM saMyamajIvana naMdavAya nahIM, tene dorSA-aticAro lAge nahIM, te mATe jAgrata rahe. sAtamI vAta che- bhikSAcarInI. gocarInI, sAdhu bhramaranI jema dareka gharethI thoDI thoDI bhikSA le. gAya jema thoDuM thoDuM caratI jAya tema sAdhu paNa thoDI thoDI bhikSA grahaNa kare. jo ghaNAM ghara hoya to eka-be gherathI badhI bhikSA grahaNa na kare. sAdhu bhikSAnA 42 doSa TALIne bhikSA grahaNa kare. 42 doSa mayaNA batAvaze. e to A badhuM bhaNelI che. vaLI, sAdhune 'jaMgamatIrtha' kahevAmAM AvyuM che. 'jaMgamatIrtha' eTale haratuMpharatuM tIrtha. tIrtho be prakAranAM hoya che : sthAvaratIrtha ane jaMgamatIrtha. aSTApada, sammetazikhara... vagere sthAvaratIrtha kahevAya. jyAre sAdhu jaMgamatIrtha kahevAya. tIrthasvarUpa sAdhupuruSanI mana-vacana-kAyAthI ArAdhanA karI karmono nAza karavAno che. dhyAnAgnimAM karmonAM lAkaDAM nAMkhIne bALI nAMkhavAnAM che. 'sAdhupada'nuM dhyAna karavAnuM che. joke tame prabhAte dhyAna karIne AvyAM cho, paraMtu Aje jyAre mana-tana svastha hoya tyAre punaH punaH dhyAna karajo. 198 eka vAta bhUlazo nahIM, sAdhutAthI ja siddhi prApta thaI zake che. jIvananuM lakSya sAdhutA joIe. A mAnavajIvanamAM jo sAdhutAnI ArAdhanA thaI jAya to AtmAnuM kalyANa thaI jAya. For Private And Personal Use Only samaNA

Page #208
zrI siddhacakrajInuM dhyAna dharavA mATe mana svastha ane nirmaLa joIe. tana svastha ane nirmaLa joIe, mana vikalpothI ane vikArothI rahita hoya to te dhyAna karavA mATe upayukta bane che. tana viSayabhogathI virakta hoya, pAMceya indriyanA viSayonA upabhogathI mukta hoya to te dhyAna dharavA mATe upayukta bane che. evI rIte AsananI sthiratA paNa joIe. A rIte zrI siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanA karI parama kalyANa pAmo, e ja maMgala kAmanA." vivecana pUrNa thayuM. ame praphullita vadane gurudevane ane anya munivarone vaMdanA karI poSadhazALAmAMthI bahAra nIkaLyAM. mANasA 199 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #209
nahi 29 mAre Aje rANAne sAdhupadanI ghaNI vAto samajAvavAnI hatI. eTale ghera AvIne, vastraparivartana karIne ame amArA khaMDamAM besI gayAM. haju AyaMbila karavAne vAra hatI. lalitAne paNa meM bolAvI lIdhI ane tattvonuM vivaraNa zarU karyuM. he nAtha! gurudeve mane AjJA karI che ke je vAto teoe mAtra nAmanirdeza karIne choDI dIdhI, te vAto mAre Apane samajAvavI. eTale sarvaprathama sAdhunAM pAMca mahAvrato samajAvuM chuM. manuSya saMsArano tyAga karIne sAdhu bane eTale eNe A pAMca mahAvrata dhAraNa karavAM ja paDe * e mahAvratomAM paheluM mahAvrata ahiMsAnA pAlananuM hoya che. "huM manavacana-kAyAthI koI jIvanI hiMsA karIza nahIM, karAvIza nahIM, je karatA haze enI anumodanA karIza nahIM.' bIjuM mahAvrata satya bolavAnuM hoya che. huM mana-vacana-kAyAthI asatya bolIza nahIM, bolAvarAvIza nahIM, je bolatA haze enI anumodanA karIza nahIM.' trIjuM mahAvrata corInA tyAganuM hoya che. huM mana-vacana-kAyAthI corI karIza nahIM, karAvarAvIza nahIM; je karatA haze tenI anumodanA karIza nahIM.' cothuM mahAvrata brahmacaryanA pAlananuM hoya che. "mana-vacana-kAyAthI abrahma (mathuna) sevIza nahIM, sevarAvIza nahIM, sevanAranI anumodanA karIza * e samaya 22 tIrthakarono hato eTale e kALe mahAvrata cAra hatAM, paraMtu vartamAnakAlIna vAcakane saMzaya pedA na thAya eTale pAMca mahAvrata batAvyAM che. e kALe cothuM ne pAMcamuM mahAvrata eka hatuM, bheguM hatuM. mANamA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #210
pAMcamuM mahAvrata aparigrahanuM hoya che. "mana-vacana-kAyAthI huM dhanadhAnyAdino parigraha rAkhIza nahIM, rakhAvIza nahIM. je rAkhatA haze temanI anumodanA karIza nahIM.' A mahAvrato sAdhunAM prANabhUta hoya che. enA pAlanamAM koI bhUla thAya, koI kSati thaI jAya to gurudevane kahIne enuM prAyazcitta kare. manamAM pazcAttApa kare. sAdhujIvananI bIjI mahattvanI ArAdhanA hoya che cha prakAranA jIvonI rakSA karavAnI. arthAt e jIvonI hiMsA na thaI jAya, e jIvone pIDA na thAya e rIte jIvana jIvavAnuM hoya che! 1. pRthvInA jIvanI, 2. pANInA jIvonI, 3. agninA jIvonI, 4. vAyunA jIvonI, 5. vanaspatinA jIvonI ane 6. trasa (hAlatA-cAlatA) jIvonI hiMsA vagere na thaI jAya, tenI sAdhupuruSo pUrepUrI kALajI rAkhe che dasa prakAranI sAvadhAnI rAkhe! (1) Thokara na lAge, (2) dhULathI DhaMkAI na jAya, (3) jamIna sAthe ghasAI na jAya, (4) paraspara jIvo athaDAI na jAya, (5) emane sparza na thaI jAya, (6) kaSTa na paDI jAya, (7) emane kheda na thAya, (8) bhayabhIta na thaI jAya, (9) sthAnAMtara na thAya ke (10) marI na jAya. ATalI kALajI rAkhavAnI hoya, Ane "SajIvanikAyanI yatanA" kahevAya. virAdhanA thaI jAya to tatkAla "micchAmi dukkaDuM' Ape. arthAt "mAruM duSkRtya mithyA thAo! ekendriyathI paMcendriya jIvonA 563 prakAra thAya che. emanI upara kahyA mujaba 10 prakAre virAdhanA thAya. rAga-dveSathI thAya, karaNa-karAvaNa -- anumodanathI thAya, mana-vacana-kAyAthI thAya; bhUtakALa, bhaviSyakALavartamAnakALamAM thAya to arihaMta, siddha, sAdhu, deva, guru ane potAnA AtmAnI sAkSIe ' mini kura' kahevAnuM. kahevAnuM tAtparya e che ke sAdhupuruSo sarve jIvomAM caitanyanuM darzana kare 201 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #211
che. badhA jIvo mArA jIva jevA ja che. mAtmavat sarvabhUteSu evI samajaNa emanI vikaselI hoya che. sAdhujIvananI A be mukhya ArAdhanAo che. trIjI ArAdhanA che daza prakAranA sAdhudharmanI, yatidharmanI. e daza prakAranA sAdhudharmamAM lagabhaga bIjI badhI vAtono samAveza thaI jAya che. he nAtha, rAga-dveSa ane moha - sarva du:kho ane sarva lezonAM mULabhUta kAraNo che. A kAraNone dUra karavA mATe, doSone AtmAthI nirmULa karavA mATe daza prakArano sAdhudharma sarvajJa paramAtmAe batAvelo che. 1. pahelo sAdhudharma che kSamA : koI ApaNane gALa de, koI ApaNuM apamAna kare, koI prahAra kare... ApaNe sahana karavAnuM. sAdhupuruSa e gALo denAra tarapha, apamAna karanAra tarapha, prahAra karanAra tarapha karuNAbhAvathI jue che. emanA tarapha roSa ke rIsa nathI karatA. sahana karavAnI ane kSamA karavAnI zakti vadhAratA rahe che. 2. bIjo sAdhudharma che mArdava : mAna-kaSAya para sAdhu vijaya meLavavA jhajhUme che. mRdu bane che. emanuM hRdaya komaLa hoya che. mAna-abhimAna hRdayane kaThora banAve che. kaThora hRdayamAM saguNanAM bIja UgatAM nathI mATe sAdhu potAnI namratAne kAyama rAkhavA prayatnazIla rahe che. eno upAya che svadoSadarzana karavAno ane bIjAonA guNa jovAno. 3. trIjo sAdhudharma che Arjava : sAdhu sarala hoya. bALaka jevI temanAmAM saralatA hoya. jema bALaka je kare, jevuM kare te badhuM mAtAne kahI de tema sAdhu potAnA gurune potAnI bhUlo saraLatAthI kahI de. koI pApa hRdayamAM chupAve nahIM. AvI saraLatAnA kAraNe sAdhupuruSa sadeva prasannacitta rahe che. 4. cotho sAdhudharma che zauca : sAdhu pavitra puruSa hoya che. lobha manuSyane apavitra kare che. tRSNA gaMdA kare che. mATe sAdhu lobha-tRSNAno tyAga kare che. AMtarika pavitratA - zuddhi prApta karavAne teo kRtanizcayI hoya che. AMtaravizaddhinA mArge satata prayatnazIlatA e zaucadharma che. 5. pAMcamo sAdhudharma che saMyama : sAdhu hiMsA-jUTha-corI-maithuna ane parigrahathI virAma pAmelA hoya che. pAMca indriyono nirodha kare che. cAra kaSAyone upazAMta kare che. mana-vacana-kAyAnI azubha pravRttio roke che. AnuM nAma saMyama! teo dRDhatApUrvaka A saMyamadharmanuM pAlana karatA rahe che. 202 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #212
6. chaThTho sAdhudharma che tyAga : teo koI jIvano vadha karatA nathI. koI jIvone bAMdhatA nathI, jIvo sAthe dayAmaya vyavahAra rAkhe che. tyAganI A eka vAta che. bIjI vAta che - saMyamI sAdhupuruSone kalpanIya bhojana-vastrapAtra Adi ApavuM. sAdhu, sAdhune prAsuka bhojanAdi Ape! 7. sAtamo sAdhudharma che satya : sAdhuo hitakArI ja bole. sva-para mATe je hitakArI hoya te bole. teo ahitakArI na bole. visaMvAdI na bole. asatya na bole, satyaniSThAne teo mahAna dharma mAne che. satya bolatAM te DaratA nathI. 8. AThamo sAdhudharma che ta5 : sAdhu tapa karatA rahe che ne tapa dvArA karmanirjarA karatA rahe che. bAhya ane atyaMtara - baMne prakAranAM tapa teo karatA rahe che. 9. navamo sAdhudharma che brahmacarya : brahmasvarUpa AtmAmAM ramaNatA karavA sAdhu maithunathI nivRtta hoya che. teo manathI paNa maithuna nathI sevatA, brahmacarya pALI zakAya evA sthAnamAM teo rahe che, tevuM ja bhojana kare che, tevI tapazcaryA kare che. evuM ja adhyayana kare che. A rIte brahmacaryanuM pAlana karatA teo tana-manathI taMdurasta rahe che; ane parama brahmanI lInatA tarapha AgaLa vadhe che. 10. dazamo sAdhudharma che AkiMcanya : sAdhu aparigrahI hoya che. mUcchanA tyAgI hoya che. mamatAnA tyAgI hoya che. teo mAtra potAnA saMyamanAM upakaraNo ja pAse rAkhe che. koI paNa pagaladravya para mamatA na thaI jAya, enI sAvadhAnI rAkhe che. bhUtakALanAM pApono nAza karavA, vartamAnakAlIna jIvanane niSpApa banAvavA ane bhaviSyanA anaMta kALane sukhapUrNa banAvavA mATe A daza prakArano sAdhudharma zreSTha upAya che. je sAdhu-sAdhvI A dazavidha dharmane manavacana-kAyAthI ArAdhe che, teo avazya sukha-zAMti ane guNasamRddhi prApta kare che.' A rIte meM emane - rANAne sAdhupadanI jhAMkhI karAvI. temanA mukha para prasannatA patharAI hatI. bayA 203 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #213
lalitAe amane Aje aDadanuM AyaMbila karAvyuM. AyaMbila karIne temaNe vizrAma karyo. huM ane lalitA bIjA khaMDamAM jaI dhImA avAje vAto karavA lAgyAM. Aje lalitA praphullita hatI. kudarate ene apUrva lAvaNyamaya kAyA ApI hatI. premabharyuM hRdaya ApyuM hatuM. te tenI suMdara AMkhothI mArI tarapha joI rahI... pachI smita karIne bolI : mArI sakhI! zrI siddhacakra-mahAmaMtranI ArAdhanAthI mAtra rAjA ja nIrogI banyA che, eTaluM nahIM, tArI deha kAMti paNa nIlakamalanI pAMkhaDIo jevI atIva suMdara banI che. sAgaranI lahero jevA tArA gADhA vALa ane nIlapA jevI ujjavala camakatI manamohaka tArI nirdoSa Akho! vizvanA zreSTha zilpakAranA hAthe ghaDAyelI pratimA jevI suMdara mukhazobhA. yogya aMgasauSThava, unnata-puSTa vakSa, pAtaLI kaTi, raMbhAta jevA goLa ghana Uru, caMpAkaLI jevI hAtha-paganI AMgaLIo, lAla zatadalapA jevI hatheLI, paganAM taLiyAM, muktAvalI jevI daMtapaMkti, vidyutane paNa zaramAve evI hAsya-rekhA. candra jevA nakha.. ane tArA zarIranI kamaLa jevI bhInI bhInI mahekathI bhramarane paNa matibhrama thaI jAya! tArA vALanA vAMkaDiyA sauMdaryamAM pavana paNa baMdhAIne sthira thaI jAya.. tAruM AvuM sauMdarya khIlI UThya che, mArI sakhI! tArA A rUpanuM varNana huM ja ekalI nathI karatI. Aje nahIM, jyAre tuM mahelamAM hatI tyAre tArA rUpanI prazaMsA kavio karatA hatA. eka mahAkavie to kahyuM hatuM : "rAja kumArI mayaNAnA rUpanuM varNana game teTaluM karo, ghaNuM badhuM bAkI rahI jAya che. jIvanabhara kAvya lakhavA chatAM ya A anupama sauMdaryane yogya upamA nahIM maLe! mayaNAnI upamA mayaNA pote ja che!' lalitA mArI priya sakhI che! mane trAMsI AMkhe joi, hoTha AmaLIne hasI paDI. meM enA mAthe TapalI mArIne kahyuM : "tane sakhInuM dila rIjhavatAM sAruM AvaDe che! tane je puruSa varaze te svarganuM sukha pAmaze!' saMdhyAkAlIna AratI karI. lalitA gharanAM badhAM kAma patAvIne cAlI gaI. ame amArA zayanakhaMDamAM cAlyAM gayAM. thoDIka alaka-malakanI vAto karI ane rAtrino bIjo prahara zarU thatAM ja ame UMdhI gayAM. 204 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #214
savAre ame vahelA jAgI gayAM. meM emane kahyuM : "nAtha, atyAre mana svastha hoya to ApaNe pAMca padonuM dhyAna karIe. Aje darzana-padanuM pUjana karavAnuM che eTale pachI to pUjanaarcana ane dhyAna-jApa darzanapadanAM karavAnAM che. atyAre be ghaDIno samaya che, to pAMca padanuM dhyAna karI laIe. pahelAM arihaMtapadanuM zveta raMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM che. pachI siddhapadanuM lAla raMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM che. tyAra bAda AcAryapadanuM pILA raMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM. te pachI upAdhyAyapadanuM lIlA raMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM ane pAMcamA sAdhupadanuM kALA raMgamAM dhyAna karavAnuM che. ame baMne jamIna para ja Asana pAtharIne padmAsane besI dhyAna lagAvyuM. be ghaDI sudhI amAruM dhyAna koI vighna vinA pUrNa thayuM ane lalitAe gharano daravAjo khakhaDAvyo. teo bolyA : "devI, Aje dhyAnamAM mAruM mana lIna thaI gayuM. hRdayamAM romAMca anubhavyo. dhyAna pUrNa thatAM eka divya prakAzano lisoTo AkAzamAMthI utarI Avyo... ne temAMthI eka divya strI-AkRtie mArA para abhaya mudrAmAM hAtha mUkyo! be kSaNa... cAra kSaNa... ane badhuM adRzya thaI gayuM!" meM temane kahyuM : "he prItama! ApanA upara zrI siddhacakramahAyaMtranI adhiSThAyikA devI cakezvarInI kapA thaI che. e divya strI-AkRti bIjI koI nahIM, devI cakezvarI ja hovAM joIe. bahu ja uttama saMkta prApta thayo!' pachI ame nitya krama mujaba paravArIne pUjAkhaMDamAM gayAM, pUjAnI badhI ja pUrvataiyArI lalitAe karI dIdhI hatI. ame baMnee aSTaprakArI pUjA karI. siddhacakra-mahAyaMtramAM vizeSarUpe "darzanapada'nI pUjA karI. tyAra pachI bhAvapUjAmAM praveza karyo. Aje zraddhAnI vINA raNajhaNI hatI... meM gadyagIta zarU karyuM : prabhu! badhAnI vacce tAro svIkAra karuM chuM. badhAMnI vacce tane hRdayathI varI chuM. mAtra mArA manamAM ja nahIM, mArA gharanA khUNAmAM ja nahIM, mArI koI racanAmAM ja nahIM, tAro mahimA jyAM ujvala rahe te badhAnI vacce tAro svIkAra karIza, ghulokamAM ane bhUlokamAM huM tane ja hRdayathI varIza. mANasA 205 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #215
badhuM tyajIne tAro svIkAra karIza. mAtra tArA jIvanamAM ja nahIM, mAtra saMgItaravamAM ja nahIM, mAtra nirjana dhyAnanA Asana para ja nahIM, paNa jyAM tAro saMsAra jAgrata rahe che tyAM karmathI tAro svIkAra karIza. priyaapriyamAM tane hRdayathI varIza. ajJAtarUpe tAro svIkAra karIza. jJAtarUpe he nAtha, tane hRdayathI varIza. mAtra jIvananA sukhamAM ja nahIM, mAtra hasatA mukhamAM ja nahIM, mAtra sArA divasonA sahaja suyogamAM ja nahIM, paNa duHkhazoka jyAM aMdhAruM karI nAMkhe che, tyAM namra banIne tAro svIkAra karIza. AMkhanA AMsu vaDe tane hRdayathI varI chuM!' zraddhAbhAvanAM kusuma caDhAvIne ame "OM &namo ' maMtrano jApa ane dhyAna zarU karI dIdhAM. eka ghaDI sudhI jApa-dhyAna karIne, pachI snAtrajaLa meM rAjAnA zarIre chAMTyuM. temanA romaroma khIlI UThaDyAM. teo be hAtha joDIne prabhunI samakSa besI gayA. temanA kaMthI eka gIta sarI paDyuM: mArI zraddhA ho tava caraNe tava smRti rahe muja maraNe bhale ne Ave jhaMjhAvAto rahuM huM jinavara-caraNe... mArI zraddhAsumana svIkAro jinavara, karo bhaktisabhara mama aMtara. raho hRdayamAM Apa niraMtara nahitara DUbuM bhavamAM bhayaMkara... mArI0 na cAhuM dolata ke na cAhuM mAna na mAguM sukha ke na cAhuM dAna. mAguM jhajhUmavAnI hAma pahoMcavA mukti kerA dhAma... mArI0 sarvajJa deva ne sadguru pAmuM sarvajJabhASita dharmane kAmuM basa, bhavane pAra javuM che jyotamAM jyotane bhaLavuM che! 206 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #216
ame paramAtmA maMdire pUjana- darzana karI gurudeva pAse pahoMcI gayAM. vaMdanA karI yogya sthAne besI gayAM. Aje gurudeva amane "darzanapada" samajAvavAnA hatA. teoe vivecanA zarU karatAM kahyuM : "Aje he mahAnubhAva! tamane "samyagudarzanapadanuM svarUpa ane mahimA samajAvIza. samyagudarzana kaho, samakita kaho, samyatva kaho, badhA samAna arthavALA zabdo che. samyagadarzana eTale deva-guru-dharma uparanI zraddhA "arihaMta mArA paramAtmA, susAdhu mArA guru ane sarvajJabhASita tattvo, te mAro dharma." AvI zraddhA te samyagudarzananI prAthamika bhUmikA che. bhale, A traNa tattvonuM svarUpa na jANatA hoya, chatAM zraddhA thaI zake. AvI zraddhAnuM mahattva paNa ghaNuM hoya che. Avo zraddhAbhAva AtmAnuM utthAna karato hoya che. AvuM samyagadarzana keTalAka jIvone janmathI ja hoya. temane sahajabhAve deva-guru-dharma game ane zraddhA thAya. keTalAka jIvo evA hoya ke saguruno saMparka thAya, paricaya thAya, zraddhAvAna sAdharmikono paricaya thAya ane samyagadarzana pragaTa thAya. keTalAka AtmAone jAtismaraNazAnathI zraddhAbhAva pragaTe. koI vakhate pUrvajanma yAda AvI jAya, pUrvajanmamAM ArAdhelA paramAtmAnI, sadUgurunI ane dharmanI smRti thaI Ave! ane A janmamAM jIvAtmAne samyagdarzana prApta thaI jAya, A samyagdarzananA judIjudI apekSAothI ghaNA prakAro che. te samajavA mATe to vyavasthita adhyayana karavuM paDe. he rAjA! tamane A badhuM mayaNA samajAvI zakaze. eNe adhyayana kareluM che. AvuM samyagudarzana ApaNAmAM pragaTyuM che ke kema, teno tame svayaM nirNaya karI zako cho! te mATe pAMca lakSaNa batAvavAmAM AvyAM che. hA, koI avadhijJAnI mahAmuni ke kevaLajJAnI to spaSTa rIte kahI zake ke tamArAmAM samakitaguNa pragaTyo che ke nahIM. pAMca lakSaNa tamane samajAvuM chuM. (1) paheluM lakSaNa che AstikatA : AstikatA eTale zraddhA. pahelAM meM samajAvyuM e pramANe paramAtmA upara, sadguru para ane sadharma upara zraddhA mayaNI 207 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #217
jAge. evI samajaNa paNa Ave ke "A deva-guru-dharmanuM zaraNa akSayapada Ape che. mATe e ja maMgalakArI che, uttama che ane zaraNabhUta che." samakitInA manamAM Avo pAkko nirNaya thayelo hoya. rja maMgala kArI hoya te ja uttama hoya, ane te ja zaraNya hoya. "traNeya lokamAM arihaMta-siddha-sAdhu ane dharma ja maMgalakArI che, kalyANakArI che ane hitakArI che. temanuM huM zaraNa svIkAruM chuM." zraddhAnu-AstikatAnuM A svarUpa che. jenA pratye tamane zraddhA thaze tame ene zreSTha samajavAnA ane tenA zaraNe javAnA. enA zaraNamAM tame tamArI jAtane surakSita mAnavAnA. tame A uttama vibhUtionA zaraNe ja zo eTale tamArAmAM bIjuM lakSaNa pragaTa thaze. (2) bIjuM lakSaNa che vairAgya : saMsAranA bhautika sukho tarapha, pAMca indriyonA viSayo tarapha mana virakta banaze. jema jema zaraNAgatino bhAva vadhato jaze tema tema saMsAra pratye vairAgyabhAva tIvra banato jaze. vairAgyabhAva pragaTaze eTale trIjuM lakSaNa paNa AtmAmAM pragaTa thavAnuM. (3) trIjuM lakSaNa che saMvega : mokSasukhanI abhilASA jAgaze! eka sukha pasaMda na Ave to bIjuM sukha gamI jAya. saMsAranA sukha na gamyAM eTale mokSasukha game! "saMsAra asAra che', A vAta samajo to "mokSa sarasa che, sArabhUta che', ema lAge. kSaNika sukha pratye vairAgya jAge to zAzvata sukha pratye rAga jAge. saMsAranAM sukhomAM jIva anAsakta bane to mokSasukhamAM Asakti jAge. (4) cothuM lakSaNa che anukaMpA : anukaMpA eTale du:khI jIvo pratye dayA, bIjAnuM duHkha joIne AtmA kaMpI UThe, te anukaMpA kahevAya. samakitI AtmA dayAthI bharelo hoya. e bIjA jIvonAM duHkha dUra karavAnI bhAvanAvALo hoya ...ane yathAzakti duHkha dUra karavA upAya paNa kare. (5) pAMcamuM lakSaNa che prazama : upazamabhAva-prazamabhAva samakitadRSTi AtmAnuM viziSTa lakSaNa che. jinadharmanI zobhA A upazamabhAvathI hoya che. samakitadaSTi jIvamAM eTalI samajaNa AvelI hoya ke "sukha ane duHkha mArAM ja karmonuM phaLa hoya che. mArAM pApa karmothI duHkha Ave, mArAM puNya 208 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #218
karmathI sukha Ave.' to pachI duHkha ApanAra pratye dveSa nahIM thAya. A che upazamabhAva! AzAtAvaMdanIya karmanA udayathI zArIrika duHkho Ave. * vividha aMtarAya karmonA udayathI jIvanamAM vighno Ave. bhoga-sukho na maLe, upabhaganAM sAdhano na maLe, mAgavA chatAM bhikSA na maLe, dAna na maLe... zArIrika zakti na maLa, dhana-saMpatti na maLe. AvI badhI samajaNa meLavavAthI (upazamabhAva' keLavAya che. he rAjA! Aje "samyagdarzanapadanI ArAdhanA karI, e guNane AtmasAt karajo! samakitadRSTi jIva sadgati pAme che!" macaNA 209 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #219
na 30 je ame pauSadhazALAthI ghera AvyAM. lalitA dvAra para ja UbhI hatI. teNe sasmita vadane amane AvakAryA, jANe ke dhara enuM hoya! rANA amArA khaMDamAM gayA. lalitAe mAro hAtha pakaDIne UbhI rAkhI ane kAnamAM bolI : "ApaNe bahAra javAnuM che. ekAda ghaDImAM pAchAM AvI jaIzuM!' paNa kyAM javAnuM che?' huM laI jAuM tyAM!" kyAM laI jaIza?" jaMgalamAM. ahIMthI thoDe dUra..." meM rANAne kahyuM : "ame jarA bahAra jaI AvIe chIe. tame vizrAma karo." ame be jaMgalanI keDIe cAlyAM. lalitA bolI : "eka yuvAna saMnyAsI eka parNakuTI bAMdhIne rahelo che! pitAjI (mahAmaMtrI somadeva) pAse Avelo. bhagavAna RSabhadevano bhakta che! che bhagavAM vastradhArI! maLavA jevo che. yuvAnI che paNa nirvikAra che! rUpavAna che paNa saMyamI che. pitAjI prazaMsA karatA hatA. eTale mane thayuM ke tane darzana karAvI dauM!" ame parNakuTI pAse pahoMcI gayAM. saMnyAsI eka nAnA bALakanI jema ATha divasa pahelAM janmelA eka suMdara navajAta vAcharaDA sAthe totaDI bhASAmAM vAto karavAmAM magna hato. vAto karatAM karatAM e vAcharaDAnuM bharAvadAra pUMchaDuM potAnA svaccha gAla para pheravI leto hato! amane joIne eNe gaMbhIrapaNe pelA vAcharaDAne kahyuM : "vRSabhaputra, ApaNe tyAM koNa AvyuM che e tuM jANe che? siddhAMtaniSThA khAtara pitA-rAjA sAthe saMgharSa karanAra ane pitAe jene eka AraNyaka kuSTharogI sAthe paraNAvI che te rAjakumArI mayaNAsuMdarI che! AcArya municandrasUrinI mAnItI ziSyA che! 210 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #220
viduSI chuM! maMtrIkanyA ene laIne AvI che. tuM enuM svAgata kara! kevaLa lukhkhA svAgatathI nahIM cAle, bhAI! tArA bhAgamAMthI aradhuM garamagarama dUdha Aja tAre ene ApavuM paDaze! ApIza ne?' eNe vAcharaDAnA kAna pAse mAM rAkhIne ene pUchyuM. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir vAcharaDAe paNa enI bora jevaDI moTI moTI AMkho mArI sAme TagaTagAvIne kAna UMcA karyA. pUMchaDAnA komaLa keza UMcA karI eNe lADathI jhaTako mAryo ane teNe moTethI huM...' kahI hoMkAro dIdho. jANe ke e saMnyAsInI bhASA samajato hoya tema! eNe jANe saMmati ApI. saMnyAsI enA bhAMbharaDAthI khuza thaI gayo. eNe enA kapALa paranI nAjuka ruvAMTI para potAnI lAMbI AMgaLI pasavArI. huM e baMnene mugdhapaNe jotI ja rahI! mane e baMne caitanyatattvanAM AkarSaka rUpa lAgyAM. ghaDIbhara mane thayuM ke huM jo RSikanyA hota to mAruM jIvana paNa AvuM ja hota ne! enI parNakuTImAM ghAsanA Asana para ame beThAM. meM ane lalitAe saMnyAsIne praNAma karyAM meM prazna karyo : 'he tyAgIpuruSa, jIvanano zreSThatam AnaMda kayo che, e jANavAnI mArI tIvra icchA che. zuM manano AnaMda ja aMtima che?' nIcI dRSTi ane madhura vANI... gaMbhIra dhvani! 'rAjakumArI, manano AnaMda aMtima nathI. aMtima AnaMda to AtmAno che! e ja zreSTha ane akhaMDa AnaMda che.' mANA A jagatamAM ApaNe zA mATe AvyA chIe? kyAM javAnA chIe? A carAcara vizvamAM kayA tAMtaNe baMdhAyA chIe? AzramanI A gAyonAM suMdara vAcharaDAM zA mATe nAcekUde che? eka ja divasanuM jIvana jIvatAM phUlo vela para vAyulaharInI sAthe hasatAM hasatAM kema Dole che? megha zA mATe garje che? vAyu zA mATe vahe che? varasAda zA mATe varase che? samasta jagatanA kaNakaNa cetanAnAM praNayagIta gAtAM gAtAM aviratapaNe kaI rIte gatimAna rahI zake che? A vizALa jIvasRSTi... vividha jIvana...vividha jIvanarasa... A badhuM jANavA mATe, A badhuM jovA mATe eka adbhuta netra ApaNI bhItaramAM che. enuM nAma AtmA che! A netra jyAre khulI jAya tyAre tamAma samasyA dUra thaI jAya che. AkhuM vizva hAthanI hatheLImAM dekhAya che! mahAbhayAnaka lAgatAM vinAzanuM du:kha For Private And Personal Use Only 211

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paNa tyAre lAgatuM nathI. mithyA AnaMda paNa nAmazeSa thaI jAya che. pachI rahe che. mAtra prakAza! mAtra AnaMda! AtmAnaMda e ja sarvazreSTha AnaMda che. saMnyAsIe potAnI vizALa AMkho mIMcI dIdhI. temanA mukhamAM "OM namo DhaSamavevAya nI prArthanA sarI. prArthanAno dhIragaMbhIra dhvani parNakuTInA prAMgaNamAM jaMgalamAM guMjI UThyo. ame UbhA thayAM. saMnyAsIe abhayamudrAthI AzIrvAda ApyA ane ame jhaDapathI ghara tarapha cAlI nIkaLyAM. 'lalitA, kharekhara AnaMda maLyo. tuM mane yogya sthAne laI gaI hatI. saMnyAsI jJAnI che, anubhavI che. mArI samaja mujaba bhagavAna SabhadevanA samayamAM je kaccha-mahAkaccha vagere rAjAo dIkSA lIdhA pachI araNyavAsI banI gayA hatA ane bhagavAna RSabhadevane ja bhajatA hatA, te paraMparAmAM A saMnyAsI ho joIe.' ame ghera pahoMcyAM. AyaMbila karavAno samaya thaI gayo hato. Aje cokhAnuM AyaMbila karavAnuM hatuM. lalitAe cokhAnI traNa-cAra vAnagIo banAvI hatI. ame AyaMbila karI lIdhuM. rANAe vAmakukSi karI. huM ane lalitA pUjAkhaMDamAM gayAM. meM lalitAne kahyuM : sakhI! Aje to atyAre prabhubhakti karIe!" ame traNa khamAsamaNa dIdhAM ane stavanA zarU karI : chone koI mAna na deje moMdhuM koI dAna na deje UMcuM koI sthAna na deje mAguM to mAguM kevaLa he vItarAgI! guMje ura gAyana zraddhAnuM.. tene nA thaMbhAvI deje... chone0 chone bhAgye ja mArA hoya cAMdanI rAto, navI ko, "sRSTi mAMhI vahetI badhI prema-bichAto, haiyAbALa ghora unALo varase Atama kALo 212 mayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

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paramAtamathI prIta karavAnI jIvanI mArI Teva purANI tene nA visarAvI deje... chone, cho na lalATe lakhela mAre malayAnilano sAtha, phUlapathArI kAmaNagArI ne pharato hetano hAtha vIMjhAtA nita vaMToLa kaMTaka-sejanA khoLe sadgurunA caraNo cUmavAnI jIvanI mArA Teva purANI tene nA visarAvI deje.. chone, lalitAe paNa bhAvapUrvaka gAyuM. ame pUjAkhaMDamAMthI bahAra AvyAM. meM lalitAne kahI rAkheluM ke A nava divasa (Aso suda-7thI Aso pUnama sudhInA) eNe rAjamahelanI ke mAmAnA mahelanI koI vAta mane na karavI. ane amArI koI vAta enA gharamAM ke rAjamahelamAM na karavI. e badhI vAto nava divasa pUrNa thayA pachI ja karavAnI hatI. namatA pahore meM rANAne ane lalitAne thoDuM thoDuM tattvajJAna samajAvyuM. AtmA zuM che? * karmo zuM che? AtmAne karmo baMdhAyelAM che. kevI rIte karmo baMdhAya? kevI rIte karmo tUTe? dharma eTale zuM? ja paramAtmAnuM svarUpa zuM? vagere vAto saraLatAthI samajAvI. saMdhyAkAlIna AratI karI. teo khUba ja harSita hatA. mane kahyuM : devI, prabhune ApaNA hRdayanI vAto karo ne! teo jarUra sAMbhaLe che! mArA mukhamAMthI zabdo vahevA lAgyA : "he mArA prabhu! ekalA gharamAM beThAM beThAM mArA jIvanamAM teM kayo sUra bajAvyo? nAtha, tAro pArasamaNi gUMthI gUMthIne khuba cUpakIthI teM mane sajAvI!' divasanA prakAzano paDado tANIne tuM kyAM saMtAyo hato e huM nathI jANatI, paNa AthamatA ravinA toraNamAMthI te rAtanAM mArAM svapnomAM paga lAMbo karyo hato! mANA 213 For Private And Personal Use Only

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kAnamAM tArI mAlakauMsI vANI saMbhaLAya che. rAta pUrI thatAM jhAkaLathI dhovAyelAM prathama prabhAte tArA karuNAbharyA kiraNomAM huM mArAM bAraNAM ughADAM pAmIza. tAruM bhuvanavyApI Asana mArA hRdayamAM bichAva! rAtanA tArA, divasano ravi, aMdhakAra ane prakAzanI badhI zobhA, AkAzane bharI detI tArI badhI vANI lAvIne mArA hRdayamAM relAva! tArI bhuvanavINAnA sakala sUrathI mArA hRdaya ane prANane bharI de ne prabhu! duHkha-sukhano badho harSa, phUlono sparza, AMdhIno sparza... tArI karuNa zubha udAra hAtha... mArA hRdayamAM lAvI de ne! he mArA sakhA, tArAM darzana pAmyA vinA ekalAM ekalAM mArA divasa jatA nathI. ame traNeya AnaMdavibhora banyAM. lalitA mane bheTIne enA ghare cAlI gaI. ame be amArA khaMDamAM cAlyAM gayAM. temaNe mane kahyuM : "tame ane lalitA bahAra gayAM hatAM tyAre nagarazreSThI ahIM AvelA. "rAja kumArI kyAM che?' temaNe mane ja pUchyuM. meM temane kahyuM ke teo bahAra gayAM che. eka ghaDI pachI Avaze. Apa ahIM birAjo." teonI najara mayaNAnA kuSTharogI patine zodhatI hatI. mAre mArI oLakhANa ApavI na hatI. teo thoDI vAra beThA ane kahyuM : "huM pharIthI AvIza. tame rAjakumArIne kahI dejo. bIjuM to koI kAma na hatuM. emane mArA A gharamAM koI takalIpha nathI ne, eTaluM ja pUchavuM hatuM.' sAruM karyuM Ape, ApanI oLakhANa na ApI. Apa nIrogI banI gayA cho, A vAta jAhera karavAnI nathI." ame eka prahara sudhI navapadonI vAto karI ane pachI sUI gayAM. sAtamA divasanI savAre nityakrama mujaba ame paramAtmAnI pUjA karI ane siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI pUjA karI. pachI caityavaMdana karyuM. Aje "jJAnapada'nI viziSTa ArAdhanA karI hatI. stavanA paNa jJAnapadanI ja karI : 214 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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he jagannAtha! huM ajJAnI chatAMya che guNa gAvAnA koDa, huM bALaka chuM kAlI vANI koNa kare che enI hoDa... he0 bhAre karmI chuM huM svAmI, chatAM tamAruM chuM Azrita loha ane sonuM jima jinavara! tima karo karmo para jita.... he, jyAM jyAM vicaro he tIrthakara prabhAva prasare cAre kora rogI sau nIrogI banatA karmonuM cAle nA jora... he, vite rAga ghora aMdhArI Uge jJAnaprakAzanuM vhANuM Apo evI zakti jinavara! pAmI zakuM muktinuM TANuM.. he, bhAvastavanA pUrNa karI ane zrI jJAnapadano jApa ane dhyAna zarU karyuM : OM hrIM namo nA ze' A maMtrano jApa zarU karyo. dhyAna zvetavarNamAM karavAnuM hatuM. jApa-dhyAna pUrNa thayA pachI meM emanA para snAtrajaLa chAMTyuM. Aje temaNe paNa snAtrajaLa mArA para chAMTyuM ane lalitA para paNa chAMTyuM. teo ati praphullita hatA. ame lalitAne ghara soMpI RSabhaprAsAdamAM gayAM. tyAM darzana-pUjana karI, pauSadhazALAmAM gayAM. gurudevane vaMdanA karI yogya Asane beThAM. gurudeve gaMbhIra svare "jJAnapada'nuM varNana karavAno prAraMbha karyo : he puNyazAlinI! siddhacakra-mahAyaMtra evuM adbhuta yaMtra che, cakra che ke je cakra dvArA manuSya potAnA karmacakrane bhedI zake che. karmacakranA ArA ATha hoya che, siddhacakranA ArA nava che! karmacakra ATha karmonuM che, siddhacakra nava padonuM che.' mANA 15 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ane anaMta kALathI karmacakra ApaNA AtmA para pharatuM rahyuM che. e pharatA rahelA karmacakra ApaNane barabAda karyA che. behAla karyA che. ApaNA bhAvaprANono nAza karyo che, have A jIvanamAM e karmacakrano nAza karavo hoya to teno eka zreSThatama upAya siddhacakra che! apUrva, abhuta ane arjaDa cakra pAse hoya paNa pheravatAM na AvaDe, nizAna letAM na AvaDe, to cakra kaMI kAmanuM ja nahIM. zastra sAruM hoya teTalA mAtrathI zatru na jitAya. zastra calAvavAmAM pAraMgatatA joIe. siddhacakrane ghumAvatAM AvaDavuM joIe.. barAbara ghumAvIne nizAna laIne pheMkavAmAM Ave to karmacakranA cUrecUrA thaI jAya. siddhacakrane ghumAvavuM eTale hRdayakamaLamAM dhyAna karavuM. e dhyAna karatAM zIkhI jAo... basa, karmacakra naSTa thayuM samajo. karmo game teTalAM hoya, game tevAM hoya, paNa mArI pAse siddhacakra che, e brahmAstra che. huM karmacakrathI Darato nathI.' A vicAra karatA raho to kyAreya nirbaLa nahIM bano. jevI rIte gAruDIne potAnI maMtrazakti para zraddhA hoya che to sAme game tevo bhayaMkara sApa Ave, chatAM gAruDI Darato nathI. tene potAnI maMtra-zakti para saMpUrNa vizvAsa hoya che. evI ja rIte sarvatattvomAM sArabhUta tattva siddhacakra che. navapada che. A tattva para ApaNI zraddhA ni:zaMka joIe. niHzaMkatA mATe jJAna joIe. te mATe jJAnapadanI ArAdhanA karavAnI che. A ArAdhanAmAM mukhya che dhyAna. paraMtu jJAna vinA dhyAna na thaI zake. jJAnapadanuM dhyAna eTale viziSTa jJAnI puruSanuM dhyAna karavAnuM. jJAnI puruSono jJAnaprakAza jovAna. nirmaLa samyagdaSTi cAritravaMta jJAnI puruSonuM dhyAna dharavAthI ApaNA jJAnAvaraNIya karmano kSayopazama thAya che. jJAnAvaraNIya karmano kSayopazama karavA viziSTa jJAnI puruSono vinaya karavo. che. emanI sevA-bhakti karavI. emanA guNonI prazaMsA karavI. che. emanA mArgadarzana mujaba jJAnArAdhanA karavI. adhyayana karatAM zaMkA paDe to samAdhAna meLavavuM. 216 mANasA For Private And Personal Use Only

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A dhArmika ane AdhyAtmika jJAnanA graMthonuM adhyayana karavuM. che zAstro, graMtho, pustakone paNa sArI rIte rAkhavAM. jJAna-jJAnInI niMdA na karavI. ...to jJAnAvaraNIya karmano kSayapazama thAya che. jJAnopAsanAmAM kaMTALo, nirAzA ke udAsInatA - A badhAM tattvo bAdhaka bane che. jJAnAbhyAsamAM mahenata karavI ja paDe. emAM pramAda-ALasa na ja cAle. mahenata karavAmAM kacAza rAkhavAnI nahIM. samyagujJAna mATe yogya kALa, vinaya, bahumAna, upadhAnatapa, guruno apalApa na karavo, sUtra, artha ane te baMnenA abhyAsarUpa ATha jJAnAcAranuM pAlana karavuM joIe. jJAnI banavA jJAnI gurunA caraNe mana-vacana-kAyAthI samarpaNa karavuM paDe. jJAnaprAptimAM pramAda dUra karavo joIe. eka sUtra yAda rAkho - 'vidyArthIne ArAmanuM sukha na hoya ne sukhArthIne vidyA na hoya! he mahAnubhAva! have huM saMkSepamAM pAMca jJAna samajAvuM chuM. jJAnanA pAMcaya prakAra che : matijJAna, zrutajJAna, avadhijJAna, mana:paryavajJAna ane kevaLajJAna. A pAMca jJAna be vibhAgamAM vibhAjita che : pratyakSa jJAna ane parokSa jJAna. pAMca indriyo ane mananI sahAya vinA mAtra AtmAnuM je jJAna, te pratyakSa jJAna kahevAya ane pAMca indriya tathA mananI sahAyathI je jJAna thAya te parokSa jJAna kahevAya. paheluM jJAna che matijJAna. tene smRti, saMjJA, ciMtA... abhinibodha vagere samAnArthaka nAma paNa che. temAM thoDo thoDo arthabheda che. vartamAnakALaviSayaka jJAnane matijJAna kahevAya. A pUrvakALamAM anubhavelI vAta ke vastunA smaraNane smRtijJAna kahevAya. pUrvakALamAM anubhavelI ane vartamAnamAM anubhavAtI vastunI ekatAnA anusaMdhAnanuM nAma "saMjJAjJAna' che. ke bhaviSyanA viSayanI vicAraNAne "ciMtAjJAna' kahevAya. A cAreya jJAnanuM aMtaraMga kAraNa "matijJAnAvaraNa karmano kSayopazama' eka ja hoya che. A matijJAnanA cAra bheda che ane 24 prakAra paNa che. macaNA 217 For Private And Personal Use Only

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bIjuM jJAna che zrutajJAna. AtmA vaDe je saMbhaLAya te "zrata' kahevAya. sAMbhaLIne je jJAna meLavAya te zrutajJAna kahevAya. A zrutajJAna indriyo ane mananA mAdhyamathI thAya che. zabdArthanA paryAlocananA anusAra je bodha thAya, te zrutajJAna kahevAya. Aptavacana, Agama, upadeza, AmnAya, pravacana, jinavacana... A badhA zrutajJAnanA paryAyavAcI zabdo che. bhinna bhinna apekSAothI zrutajJAnanA judA judA prakAro batAvavAmAM AvelA che. 12 prakAra, 14 prakAra, ra0 prakAra, cAra prakAra ane be prakAra A badhA prakAro anukULa samaye mayaNA tamane samajAvaze. trIjuM jJAna che avadhijJAna. avadhi' eTale maryAdA, dravyanI, kSetranI ane kALanI maryAdAvALuM A jJAna hoya che. indriyo ane mananA mAdhyama vinA AtmA sAkSAt arthane jANe. AtmAnI rUpI padArthonA pratyakSa jJAnanI pravRtti te avadhijJAna che. cothuM jJAna che mana:paryavajJAna. mananI vAto sarva prakAre jANavI, mana saMbaMdhI badhuM ja jANavuM te mana:paryavajJAna kahevAya. pAMcamuM jJAna che kevaLajJAna. A eka ja jJAna che (AnA prakAro nathI), zaddha che, paripUrNa che, asAdhAraNa che ane anaMta che. kevaLajJAna sarva dravyo ane sarva paryAyone jANe che. evuM koI dravya nathI ke evo koI bhAva nathI ke je kevaLajJAna dvArA jANI na zakAya; joI na zakAya. lokAlokanA anaMta paryAyone jANavAnuM sAmarthya hoya che A kevaLajJAnamAM. A ja parama zreSTha jJAna che. have eka AtmAmAM ekasAthe keTalAM ne kyAM jJAna hoya te batAvuM chuM: * kyAreka AtmAmAM matijJAna-zrutajJAna - be jJAna hoya che. kyAreka AtmAmAM mati-zrata ane avadhi - traNa jJAna hoya. che kyAreka AtmAmAM mati-zruta ane mana:paryava - traNa jJAna hoya. * kyAreka AtmAmAM mati-zruta-avadhi ne mana:paryava - cAra jJAna hoya. ke kyAreka AtmAmAM eka ja kevaLajJAna hoya... A rIte gurudeve "jJAnapada' samajAvyuM. ame dhanyatA anubhavI. gurudevano upakAra mAnI ame UbhAM thayAM. anya munivarone vaMdanA karI bahAra nIkaLyAM. 218 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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hA 31 ke nagarazreSThInI A maDhulImAM amAruM jIvana AnaMdathI vyatIta thatuM hatuM. kyAM divasa Uge ne kyAM Athame tenI khabara sudhdhAM rahetI nahi. bALapaNathI pataMgiyAnI jema pAchaLa doDatI lalitA mArI pAse hatI. rAjamahalanI dIvAlo para mAthuM pachADatI mArI mA rUpasuMdarI kyAMka lapAI gaI hatI. khare ja, vismRti e manuSyajIvananI kevI prabhAvaka zakti che! rojabaroja manuSyanA jIvanamAM keTakeTalA banAvo bane, e badhAya mANasanA hRdayamAM jaLavAI rahe to? to enA paraspara saMbaMdhonA tANAvANA jaDatAM AMkhe aMdhArAM AvI jAya! pAgala banI javAya! eTale ja kadAca kudarate A vismRtinuM aNamola varadAna ApyuM haze! huM pote ja mArA bhAgya para ovArI gaI. ahIM mane koI vAtanI kamI nahotI. mArA pati paNa premALa ane suMdara hatA. mArA gurudeva jJAnI, vatsala ane karuNAsAgara hatA. huM mArI maDhulIna gavAkSamAM UbhI UbhI kSiprA nadIne ekITase jotI UbhI hatI. pAchaLathI koIe AvIne acAnaka mArI AMkho dAbI dIdhI. huM gabharAI gaI. AMkha para hAthanI pakaDa majabUta thaI. oha! A to lalitAnA hAthe hatA! huM hasI paDI... e mane harSathI bheTI paDI. eNe kahyuM : sakhI, mArI vAta mArA pitAjI mAnI gayA!' kaI vAta?' nahIM paraNavAnI.!" "are gAMDI, ema te cAle? tAre paraNavuM to paDaze ja!' "to pachI huM tArI sAthe kevI rIte rahI zakIza?" "to zuM kAyama tuM mArI sAthe rahevAnI che?' 'tuM nahIM rAkhe?' lalitAnI AMkho bhInI thaI gaI. svara ArTa thaI garyo. tenI moTI moTI mohaka AMkho mane joI rahI. mANA 219 For Private And Personal Use Only

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tuM samajadAra sakhI cho. huM kahuM tema tAre karavAnuM...' bhale...' te thoDI nArAja thaI. meM enI pITha pasavArIne heta varasAvyuM. ame AyaMbila karyuM. Aje paNa cokhAnuM AyaMbila karavAnuM hatuM. AyaMbila karIne rANAe vizrAma karyo. meM lalitAne sArI rIte samajAvI. mane paNa nidrA AvatI hatI eTale huM paNa sUI gaI. lalitA gRhakAryamAM lAgI gaI. sAMje ame bhAvapUrvaka AratI karI. prabhunI stavanA karI. ha arUpa! tamArI vANI mArA aMgamAM, mArA cittamAM mukti lAvI Apo. nityakALano tamAro utsava che vizvanI divALI. huM kevaLa tenuM eka mATInuM koDiyuM chuM. temAM kadI na bujhAtI, prakAzathI jhaLahaLatI tamArI icchA rUpI zikhA peTAvo." he anAma! jema tamAro vasaMtavAyu raMgeraMgamAM, puSpomAM, pAMdaDAMmAM, vane vane ane dizAe dizAe gIta aMkita karI jAya che, tema mArA prANanA kendramAM tamArI phUMka bharI do! tenA sUnakAramAM pUrNatA ApI sUrathI dhanya banAvo. tamAro dakSiNa kara mane pavitra karo..." he akSaya! "vipattimAM mArI rakSA karo', e mArI prArthanA nathI, paNa vipattimAM huM bhaya nA pAmuM ema icchuM chuM. duHkhamAM, tApamAM ke vyathita cittamAM bhale sAMtvanA nA Apo, duHkha para vijaya meLavuM, ema huM icchuM chuM. bhale mane sahAya na maLe, paNa mAruM baLa na tUTe ema icchuM chuM. saMsAramAM kSati pAmI, vacanA pAmI, chatAM mArA manamAM kSati na pAmuM tema icchuM chuM. tuM mAro bacAva karaje, e mArI prArthanA nathI, tarI zakuM eTalI zakti rahe ema icchuM chuM. bhale mAro bhAra haLavo na kara, paNa huM e bhAra vahI zakuM ema icchuM chuM. nata mastake, sukhanA divase tAro cahero oLakhI laIza, duHkhanI rAte samagra saMsAra jyAre vaMcanA kare tyAre tArA para saMzaya na karuM tema icchuM chuM! ha anaMta! baLa Apo, mane baLa Apo. hRdayanuM sarvasva luMTAvIne tamane praNAma karavA, sumArge bhramaNa karavA, badhA apakAro mApha karavA, badhA garvanuM khaMDana karavA, kumatine avagaNavA mArA prANamAM zakti Apo. tamane hRdayathI oLakhavA, tamane jIvanamAM pUjavA, tamArAmAM mArA cittanuM vAsasthAna zodhavA 220 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArA prANamAM zakti Apo. tamAruM kArya sAthe levA, saMsAranA tApa sahevA, bhavanA kolAhalamAM rahevA, nIravapaNe bhakti karavA mArA prANamAM zakti Apo. mana ane vacanathI para evI tamArI jyotimAM bhaLI javA, sukha-dukhamAM, lAbha-nukasAnamAM tamArI vANIne sAMbhaLavA mArA prANamAM zakti Apo." rAtrinA prathama praharamAM meM temane pAMca jJAnanI vAto thoDI saraLatAthI samajAvI. emaNe keTalAka prazano paNa puchuyA. meM emanuM samAdhAna karavA prayatna karyo. temanA mukha para saMtoSanI chAyA UpasI AvI hatI. bIjA praharamAM ame nidrAdhIna thayAM. vahelI savAre UThIne ame bhagavAna RSabhadevanuM ane zrI siddhacakranuM smaraNa karyuM. Aje amAre "cAritrapadanI ArAdhanA karavAnI hatI. sAdhupadanI ArAdhanA vakhate amane "cAritra' aMge thoDI samajaNa to maLI ja hatI. ame snAna karI, zuddha vastra paherI pUjAkhaMDamAM gayAM. lalitAe roja mujaba badhI ja pUrvataiyArI karelI hatI. ame prabhunuM ane siddhacakranuM aSTaprakArI pUjana karyuM. vizeSarUpe cAritrapadanuM pUjana karyuM. pachI bhAvapUjAmAM pravRtta thayAM. saMyamamaya jIvana ho! bhagavad saMyamamaya jIvana ho! sarva jIvonA pratye maitrI, dayA-karuNA hojo banuM upayogI sau jIvone, evo manoratha hojo jIvana guNa-upavana ho saMyamamaya jIvana ho... priya, satya ne pathya vacana muja mukhanI zobhA ho, asatya ne apriya vacanothI sadaiva mana tobA ho... jIvana satkaMcana ho, saMyamamaya jIvana ho. nyAya-nItine pramANikatA mama gRhano zaNagAra hojo, kadI na corI karavAno manamAM paNa vikAra hojo.. mANA 221 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #231
sadeva Atama-ciMtana ho saMyamamaya jIvana ho.. brahmacaryanuM pAlana karavA muja mana tatpara hojo. kadI na UThe viSayavAsanA kara tuma muja para hojo. paramabrahmanuM maMthana ho saMyamamaya jIvana ho.. na mamatA, na mUrchA manamAM rahe A bhautika arthomAM nirmama-nirlobhI banavuM, ramavuM che paramArthomAM jIvana sugaMdhI caMdana ho saMyamamaya jIvana ho..... stavanA pUrNa karIne ame "OM zrIM namo vArittara' maMtrano jApa ane dhyAna zarU karyuM. zvetavarNamAM dhyAna karyuM. eka ghaDI sudhI dhyAna karyA pachI meM snAtrajaLa rANAnA zarIra para chAMTyuM. emaNe mArA para chAMTyuM. amArAM citta praphullita thayAM. ame baMne jinamaMdire gayAM. darzana-pUjana karIne gurudeva pAse pahoMcI gayAM. vidhipUrvaka vaMdana karI ucita jagAe besI gayAM. gurudeve "cAritrapada" samajAvavAno prAraMbha karyo : mokSamArganI ArAdhanAmAM jeTaluM mahattva samyagudarzananuM ane samyagUjJAnanuM che, eTaluM ja mahattva samyakjhAritranuM che. eTale zrI siddhacakramAM darzana ane jJAna pachI cAritrapada batAvavAmAM AvyuM che. cAritradharma be prakArano che : kriyAtmaka ane bhAvAtmaka. pratikramaNa, AlocanA, svAdhyAya, pratilekhanA, pramArjanA, nigama-praveza vagere kriyAtmaka cAritradharma che. kSamA, namratA, saraLatA vagere daza prakArano sAdhudharma bhAvAtmaka cAritradharma A be prakAranA cAritradharmamAMthI eka paNa dharmanI upekSA na karI zakAya. A cAritradharmanA pAlanathI ja huM mokSamArganI ArAdhaka banI zakuM. arthAt nirvANa pAmI zakuM." AvI daDha zraddhA hovI joIe. 222 mayamAM For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #232
A cAritradharmanI ArAdhanAmAM satata jAgRti joIe. eka samayano paNa pramAda na karavo joIe. * yogya kALe vidhipUrvaka - bhAvapUrvaka pratikramaNa karavAnuM che. OM jJAnI gurudeva samakSa doSonI ArlocanA karavAnI hoya che. *divasa ane rAtanA ATha praharamAM pAMca prahara svAdhyAya karavAno che. * hRdayamAM jIvadayAnA bhavane akhaMDa rAkhI, vastra, pAtra vagerenI pratilekhanA karavAnI che. * karuNAbharyA haiye vastInuM pramArjana karavAnuM che. mArge jatAM-AvatAM jIvarakSAno upayoga rAkhavAno che. A rIte bhAvadharma ane kriyAdharmamAM zraddhApUrvaka apramatta banIne udyamazIla bane che sAdhu. A che cAritradharma. cAritradharmanI ArAdhanAmAM eka viziSTa ArAdhanA che sAdhusevA. bAla, vRddha, bImAra ane mahemAna sAdhuonI AdarapUrvaka sevA-bhakti karIne temane sukhazAnti ApavAnI che. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir evI ja rIte jJAnavRddha, paryAyavRddha ane jinazAsananA prabhAvaka sAdhupuruSonI paNa avasarocita sevA karavAnI che. A sAdhusevAnA guNane akhaMDa rAkhavA sAdhue guNadraSTA ne guNAnurAgI banavuM paDe. dareka sAdhupuruSamAM guNo ja jovAnA. chadmastha AtmAomAM doSo to hoya ja, chatAM doSo nathI jovAnA. kAraNa ke doSadarzana saddabhAvano nAza kare che. doSadarzanamAMthI dveSa janme che. cAritradharma eTale AtmaguNomAM ramaNatA karavAnI che, cAritravaMta mahAtmAne* mada-mAna sparzI zakatuM nathI. kAmavAsanA satAvI zakatI nathI. * moha phasAvI zakato nathI. maNA * matsara abhaDAvI zakato nathI. * roSa bhAna bhulAvI zakato nathI. OM viSAda vyAkuLa karI zakato nathI. have A cAritradharmanI cha bhAvAtmaka vAtone spaSTatAthI samajAvuM chuM. 1. AtmaguNonuM pragaTIkaraNa karavAnI ArAdhanAmAM lIna evA mahAtmAnuM koI ghora apamAna kare to paNa emanAmAM abhimAna UchaLatuM For Private And Personal Use Only 223

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nathI. ahaMkAra emane bharaDo daI zakato nathI. 2, parama brahmamAM magna evA mahAtmAnI sAme game tevI rUpasuMdarIo AvIne UbhI rahe, gIta gAya ke nRtya kare, chatAM e mahAtmAnA manamAM kAmavikArano eka jhabUko paNa thato nathI. kAmadevanuM ekeya bANa emane vIMdhI zakatuM nathI. 3. AtmabhAvamAM dRDhapaNe sthira rahelA maharSine priya-apriya viSayamAM rati ke arati thatI nathI. temanAmAM hAsya ke uga hotA nathI. khedauddhagathI para rahe che. 4. mokSamArganI ArAdhanAmAM nirata munivaranA haiye matsaranAM jALAM bAjhelAM na hoya. cAritravaMta AtmAnA cittacaMdramAne matsara, IrSAno rAhu grasI zakato nathI. 5. kSamAdharmane munijIvanano paryAya mAnanArA maharSine roSa hoya ja nahIM. jemane mAna-sanmAnanI apekSA nathI, Adara-satkAranI AzA nathI. priyavacanonI apekSA nathI. anukULatAono Azaro joIto nathI ke karelA upakAronA badalAnI apekSA nathI... evA cAritravaMta AtmAne roSa Ave ja kyAMthI? 6. dhIra-vIra banIne vizuddha AtmapradezanI parizodhamAM nIkaLI paDelA parAkramI mahAtmAo, mArgamAM game tevAM vighno Ave, saMkaTo Ave, upasargo ke pariSaho Ave, chatAM khinna nathI thatA. utsAhabhagna nathI thatA; ke bhayabhIta nathI thatA. AvA cAritravaMta mahAtmAonA guNa gAvA mATe sRSTimAM koI upamA jaDatI nathI! he suzIle! eka vAta pahelAM samajI levI joIe ke cAritradharmanI prAptino saMbaMdha "mohanIyakarmanA kSayopazama sAthe rahelo che. sarvaprathama darzanamohanIya (mithyAtva) karmano kSayopazama thavo joIe. te pachI anaMtAnubaMdhI, apratyAkhyAnAvaraNa ane pratyAkhyAnAvaraNa kaSAyono kSayopazama thavo joIe. A traNa jAtanA krodha-mAna-mAyA ane lobhano kSayopazama thAya tyAre cAritradharmanI prApti thAya. arthAtu prazasta mana-vacana-kAyAnA yogothI bAra prakAranA kaSAyono kSaya, upazama ke kSayopazama thAya tyAre cAritradharmanI prApti thAya che. A kaSAyo 224 mayANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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* bujhAI gayelA agni jevA kSINa kaSAyo hoya. (kSaya) rAkhathI DhaMkAyelA agni jevA upazAMta kaSAyo hoya. (upazama) * kaMIka olavAyelA ane kaMIka rAkhathI DhaMkAyelA agni jevA hoya. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir (kSayopazama) Avo uttama cAritradharma jemanAmAM hoya tevA cAritravaMta vaMdanIya sAdhupuruSanuM zvetavarNamAM dhyAna karavAnuM. guNa arUpI che, arUpInuM dhyAna na thaI zake. dhyAnarUpI dravyanuM thAya. eTale cAritraguNavALA mahAtmAnuM dhyAna karavAnuM. je cAritravaMta mahApuruSonuM dhyAna dharavAnuM che te saMpUrNa saMyamInuM dhyAna dharavAnuM che. jemaNe hiMsAdi pAMceya pApono trividhe trividha tyAga karelo hoya. mana-vacana-kAyAthI pApo kare nahIM, karAve nahIM, karatAnI anumodanA kare nahIM.' gurudeva cAritrapadanI vivecanA pUrNa karIne mane kahyuM : 'tuM rANAne karmono kSaya, upazama, kSayopazama sArI rIte samajAvaje. emanA mATe A badhI vAto navI che. paNa teo samajI zakaze.' zamaNA gurudeva roja emanA (rANAnA) zarIra para dRSTi nAMkhatA hatA. temanA mukha para saphaLatA maLyAno saMtoSa dekhAto hato. ame anya munivarone vaMdanA karI pauSadhazALAmAMthI bahAra nIkaLyAM. For Private And Personal Use Only 225

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nA 32 ha. ghera AvIne, vastraparivartana karIne ame amArA khaMDamAM beThAM. meM kahyuM : atyAre huM tamane karmono kSaya, upazama ane kSayopazama eka dRSTAMta ApIne samajAvuM chuM.' eka mANasane tarasa lAgI che. jaMgalamAMthI pasAra thaI rahyo che. enI pAse pANI che, paNa kacarAvALuM che. teNe e pANI bIjA pyAlAmAM gALI nAMkhyuM. garaNAmAM je kacaro rahyo te teNe pheMkI dIdho; paNa te chatAM ya gaLelA pANImAM sUkSma kacaro to rahI gayo hato. teNe te pANIno pyAlo jamIna para mUkI dIdho. dhIre dhIre kacaro pANInI nIce besI gayo. A thayo kacarAno kSaya, upazama ane kSayopazama! garaNAmAM je kacaro rahI gayelo teno kSaya thayo, sUkama kacaro je pANInI nIce besI gayo, te upazama thayo. A baMne vAto bhegI kahevI hoya to "kSayopazama thayo', ema kahevAya, A rIte cAritramohanIya karma(kaSAyo-12)no kSayopazama thAya eTale kSAyopathamika cAritranI prApti thAya. koI mANasa pANIne gALI zakato nathI. gaLavA mATe enI pAse dhAro ke garaNuM ja nathI, e pANInA pyAlAne jamIna para sthira mUkI de che. dhIre dhIre badho kacaro pANInI nIce besI jAya che! pANI cokhkhuM thaI jAya che. Ane upazama cAritra - aupazamika cAritra kahevAya, koI mANasa kacarAvALA pANIne gALIne, ukALIne ekadama zuddha kare, emAM jarA ya kacaro na rahe, tema je manuSya cAritramohanIya karmano (12 kaSAyono) kSaya karI nAMkhe, tene "kSAyika' cAritranI prApti thAya che. A rIte cAritramohanIya karmanA kSayathI, upazamathI ane kSayopazamathI cAritradharmanI prApti thatI hoya che, temane vAta samajAI gaI. teo bolyA : have barAbara samajAyuM!' 226 mayA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #236
joke pahelA ja AyaMbilathI huM AnaMdita hatI. paNa Aje AThamA AyaMbilanA divase mArA AnaMdanI sImA rahI nathI. duHkhanI rAta to pUrI thaI gaI che. jyAre rANAnI ArogyaprAptinA samAcAra nagaramAM ane pUrA mAlavadezamAM phelAze tyAre jaina dharmanA niMdakonAM moM sivAI jaze ane prajAne jaina dharmano kharo paricaya thaze. japa-tapa-pUjA-upAsanA ane brahmacaryanA kAraNe emanuM teja vadhyuM hatuM. zarIra kudaratI sauMdaryathI tejasvI banyuM hatuM. jaina dharmanA dveSIonAM dila bALavA mATe jANe daive badhuM rUpa emanAmAM ThAlavI dIdhuM hatuM! vasaMtanAM vadhAmaNAM karatA ko' vRkSanI DALe pahelavahelI kUMpaLo phUTatI dekhAya, yA choDanI DALe UgelI kaLI acAnaka ja eka savAre phUlapAMkhaDI banI khIlI UThe, tevI rIte mAruM hRdaya rANAne nIrogI joI khIlI UThyuM hatuM. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mArA hRdayane je duHkha korI khAtuM hatuM mArA dharmanI niMdA... mArAthI sAMbhaLI jatI na hatI. ane e mATe ja meM gurudevane rotI AMkhe vinaMtI karI hatI... 'gurudeva! evo upAya batAvo ke rANAno kuSTharoga dUra thaI jAya... ne loko jinadharmanI niMdA karavAnuM pApa tyajI de...' gurudeve kevI apUrva kRpA karI! kevo anupama upakAra karyo! AvA gurudeva mane maLI gayA... e mArA puNyanI parAkASThA che... huM janamojanama emane bhUlI nahIM zakuM. emanA upakArano badalo vALavo asaMbhava che mArA mATe. ane jyAre rAjamahelamAM A samAcAra pahoMcaze tyAre? mArA pitA... mahArAjA prajApAla... kevA bhoMThA paDI jaze? karmano siddhAMta mAnyA vinA cAlaze kharuM? mAnavo ja paDaze; ane mArI abhilASA pUrI thaze. Ama to temane, temanA hRdayamAM mArA pratye prema che ja. eTale rANA nIrogI banyAnA samAcAra maLatAM ja... teo avazya doDI Avaze! Ama to teo saraLa ne bhoLA che! gayA - ane jyAre duniyAne vAstavikatAnI jANa thaze ke e kuSTharogI uMbararANA to aMgadezanI caMpAnagarIno rAjA hato tyAre loko potAnI kAnapaTTI pakaDIne mAthAM dhuNAvaze! emAM ya vaLI pratyakSa pramANarUpe svargastha For Private And Personal Use Only 227

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rAjA siMharathanI rANI kamalaprabhAne jaze... tyAre ? mAre to jinezvarabhASita, sarvajJakathita "karmasiddhAMta' manAvavAnI vAta hatI. manuSya sukha pAme che potAnA puNyakarmathI ane duHkha pAme che potAnA pApakarmanA udayathI! koI koIne sukhI nathI karI zakatuM, koI koIne duHkhI nathI karI zakatuM. hA, vyavahAradharmamAM mAtA-pitAne upakArI mAnavAnAM che. je koI sukhamAM sahAyaka bane, nimitta bane, e badhAMno upakAra mAnavAno che. paNa upakAra karanAre to kyAre ya ema nathI mAnavAnuM ke "meM Ane sukhI karyo... meM Ane AbAda karyo. huM na hota to e barabAda thaI jAta, du:khI thaI jAta." Avo ahaMkAra karavAno ja nathI. mArA pitAjI sAthe A ja vAta para virodha thayo ne? saMtAno, Azrito upakArIno upakAra mAne ja. mAnavo ja joIe. mAtA-pitAnA upakArono badalo vALarvo ghaNo muzkela hoya che. paraMtu ethI ya vizeSa upakArI sadguru hoya che! teo A bhava ane parabhava - baMne bhavanA upakArI hoya che... eTale emanA upakArano badalo vALavo to ati - ati muzkela che. chatAM gurudeva kyAre ya bolyA nathI ke bolaze nahIM ke "mayaNA, meM tArA para kevo upakAra karyo! meM jo tane siddhacakra-mahAyaMtra na ApyuM hota to eka kuSTharogI pati sAthenI tArI jiMdagI narakanI jiMdagI banI jAta... kyAre ya nahIM! jJAnI puruSa kyAre ya mAne nahIM ke "meM Ane sukhI karyo!' na ja mAne, na ja bole. meM jyAre gurudevane kaheluM : "gurudeva! ApanA ja divya anugrahathI rANAne kuSTharoga maTI gayo. mAruM duHkha gayuM..!" tyAre gurudeve kaheluM : "mayaNA! e divya anugraha paramAtmAno che! siddhacakrajIno che, huM to nimitta mAtra chuM! tuM puNyazALI che. tArAM puNyakarma udayamAM AvyAM che...' mArI vicAradhArA to vahetI ja raheta... paNa lalitA vahevA de to ne! sakhI! Aje kaMI gaMbhIra vicAramAM?' "hA lalitA, AvatI kAle chelle AyaMbila! nava divasanI ArAdhanA pUrI thaI jaze!" 228 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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eTale?" pachInA vicAro Ave ne?' paNa atyAre AyaMbila karavAno samaya thaI gayo che, padhAro rAjakumArI mayaNAsuMdarI!' huM hasI paDI. lalitA mAro hAtha pakaDI mane rasoIghara tarapha laI gaI. rANA AvI gayA hatA. ame zAMtithI cokhAnuM AyaMbila karyuM. nityakrama mujaba teoe vizrAma karyo ane huM tathA lalitA gharanI parasALamAM jaIne beThAM. thoDI ADI-avaLI vAto karI tyAM kuSTharogIonA paDAvamAMthI javAnasiMha AvIne daravAje Ubho rahyo. meM ene joyo. "are javAnasiMha! atyAre....' 'hA devajI, rANAnAM darzana karavAnI tIvra icchA jAgI eTale doDI Avyo.' kema cAle che tyAM badhAnuM? koI muzkelI to nathI ne?' nA devIjI, koI duHkha nathI. badhuM sAruM cAle che... paNa rANA vagara badhuM sUnuM sUnuM lAge che... gamatuM nathI." javAnasiMhanI AMkho bhInI thaI gaI. meM ene gharamAM bolAvyo, besADyo. lalitAe pANI ApyuM. meM kahyuM : "javAnasiMha, rANA sUI gayA che. hamaNAM hamaNAM temane UMgha ghaNI Ave che eTale jagADavA nathI.." nA, nA, jagADazo nahIM, huM dUrathI ja joI laIza.." huM zayanakhaMDa pAse javAnasiMhane laI gaI. teo cAdara oDhIne sUI gayA hatA. mukha khulyuM hatuM. javAnasiMhe manapaNe praNAma karyA ane meM ene vidAya karyo. jyAM sudhI ArAdhanA pUrI na thAya tyAM sudhI mAre emane nIrogI jAhera karavA na hatA. basa, be divasa vacce hatA, Aja ane kAla! pachI bhale teonI nIrogitA jAhera thaI jAya! javAnasiMhanA gayA pachI lalitA rAjamahelanI vAto karavA icchatI hatI, paNa meM nA pADI. meM kahyuM ke atyAre ArAdhanAnA pavitra divaso cAle che. emAM rAga-dveSa jAge evI koI vAto ApaNe karavI nathI. atyAre to bharapUra upazamabhAvamAM ja rahevuM che.' saMdhyA samaye ame AratI karI. prabhunI stavanA karI. mayaNA 229 For Private And Personal Use Only

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vAge che Aje uranI sittAra gAvuM chuM Aje rAga malhAra mUrti manahara che, mArI AMkho Thare kevo tuM jinavara che! mArI AMkho Thare... raNajhaNe A tAro, jANe guMje che bhamarA phUlo para AlApuM huM A saragama jANe Tahuke che koyala DAlo para! manaDAnAM gIta che A, gIto madabhara che... mArI AMkho hare... rasa jhare dayAno, jANe varase che megha aSADhI Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir varaso prabhu niraMtara, aMtaranA dvAro ughADI aMtaranAM sukha done, sukho A kSaNabhara che... mArI AMkho Thare... rUpa che anupama, jANe brahmAe sarajyuM na hoya! dhyAna dharuM jinezvara, jANe koI judAI na hoye... darzana ho Atamane, darzana hitakara che, mArI AMkho re... stavanA pUrNa karI ame amArA khaMDamAM gayAM. lalitA enA ghare cAlI gaI. ame zrI siddhacakrajInA prabhAvonI ahobhAvapUrvaka eka prahara sudhI vAto karatA rahyA. amArAM baMnenAM hRdayamAM zrI siddhacakrajInuM sthAna avicala banI gayuM hatuM. Aje Azvina pUrNimA hatI. amArI ArAdhanAno Aje chello divasa hato. amAro ullAsa-utsAha apAra hato. Aje lalitAe vizeSarUpe pUjanasAmagrI taiyAra karI hatI. ame pUjAkhaMDamAM pravezyAM. sarvaprathama paramAtmAnI aSTaprakArI pUjA khUba ja tanmaya banIne karI... pUjana karatAM karatAM pUjya-pUjakano bhedabhAva ogaLI gayo ane abhedabhAve paramAtmamilana thayuM! zarIra romAMcita thaI gayuM! anuSThAna 'amRta anuSThAna' banI gayuM. 230 te pachI zrI siddhacakrajInuM paNa apUrva bhAvathI pUjana thayuM. jANe ke amane sarvasvanI prApti thaI gaI hoya evo bharapUra vizvAsa pragaTayo. ame pUrNa abhayanI anubhUti karI. amane jANe divya draSTi maLI gaI hoya, evAM navapadanAM divya darzana thayAM! For Private And Personal Use Only caNA

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Aje navamA 'tapapada'nI ArAdhanA vizeSarUpe karavAnI hatI. eTale 'tapaMpada'nI stavanA zarU karI : kevo A saMsAra? nathI ko ya sAra... ArAdho tapanA bAra prakAra... ArAdho0 tapathI thAye karmanirjarA pApo sahuye saLage maLe sukha ne zAMti manane, jAye udvega aLage... pAmo samatAno zaNagAra... ArAdho mamatA tUTe dehabhAvanI, pragaTe Atamajyoti puNyodaya bharapUra thAya ne pAmo guNanAM motI banavuM eka dina aNagAra... ArAdho divya tattvo sAMnidhya kare ne sahAya kare saMkaTamAM zakti maLe evI adbhuta ke cAlI zako kaMTakamAM... karavo guru taNo sathavAra... ArAdho stavanA pUrNa karIne 'OM hrI~ no tavaransa' A maMtrano jApa zarU karyo. zvetavarNamAM tapapadanuM dhyAna karyuM. Aje ame baMne dhyAnamAM nimagna banI samAdhimAM lIna banI gayAM. be TikA vItI gaI. ame jAgrata banyAM. amArI AMkhomAMthI harSanAM AMsu vahetAM hatAM. ame gadgad hatAM. dhIre dhIre UbhAM thayAM, mastaka namAvI, hAtha joDI, pUjAkhaMDamAMthI bahAra nIkaLyAM. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir Aje ame RSabha-prAsAdamAM viziSTa phaLa-naivedya-puSpa Adi laIne gayAM hatAM, paramAtmAnI bhAvapUrvaka pUjA karI hatI. pachI gurudevazrInI pAse pauSadhazALAmAM gayAM hatAM. maNA gurudevane vaMdanA karI ame ucita jagAe besI gayAM. Aje gurudeva amane 'tapapada' samajAvavAnA hatA. teoe vivecanA zarU karI : 'he mahAnubhAva, Aje tamane 'tapapada' aMge samajaNa ApIza. tame ekAgratApUrvaka sAMbhaLajo.' je karmone tapAve nAza kare tene tapa kahevAya. anAdikALathI AtmA ane karmano saMyoga che. jyAM sudhI AtmA karmothI baMdhAyelo che tyAM sudhI te saMsArI che ane jyAM sudhI saMsArI che tyAM sudhI janma-jIvana For Private And Personal Use Only 231

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ane mRtyunAM duHkho jIve bhogavavAnAM rahe che. parama sukhamaya mokSadazAne prApta karavAno puruSArtha karavA jeo saMkalpa kare che te sAdhako potAnA jIvanamAM tapazcaryAne samucita sthAna Ape che. arthAt jIvanane tapomaya banAve che. tapazcaryAnA mukhya be bheda batAvavAmAM AvyA che : bAhya tapa ane atyaMtara tapa. je tapa bIjA manuSya joI zake tene bAhya tapa kahevAya che ane je tapa bIjA manuSyo nathI joI zakatA tene atyaMtara tapa kahevAya che. baMne tapanA cha-cha prakAro batAvavAmAM AvyA che. pahelAM bAhya tapanA cha prakAro batAvuM chuM : pahelo prakAra che anazana. eka upavAsathI mAMDIne cha mahinAnA upavAsanI tapazcaryAne "anazana' kahevAmAM Ave che. AyaMbila vagere tapano samAveza paNa A prakAramAM thaI jAya che. bIjo prakAra che UNodarI, bhUkha karatAM ochuM khAvuM tenuM nAma UNodarI. sAmAnyatayA puruSe 3ra koLiyAno AhAra karavAno hoya che. ghaTADatAMghaTADatAM ATha koLiyA AhAra kare. trIjo prakAra che vRtti saMkSepa. sAdhu-sAdhvI mATe A tapano artha che bhikSAno saMkSepa. arthAt gRhasthonAM gharomAMthI parimita bhikSA grahaNa kare. bIja sAmAnya artha che khAvAnI vastuonI saMkhyAnuM niyaMtraNa karavuM. cotho prakAra che rasatyAga. dUdha, dahIM, mAkhaNa, goLa, ghI Adi vikRtiono tyAga karavo. zakya eTalI vikRtiono tyAga karavo. pAMcamo prakAra che kAyakleza, kAyotsarga dhyAne UbhA rahevuM. taDakAmAM UbhA rahevuM. AtApanA levI, kaDakaDatI ThaMDImAM nirvastra banI UbhA rahevuM vagere zArIrika kaSTo jANIbUjhIne sahana karavAM. chaThTho prakAra che saMlInatA. A tapanA be prakAra che : (1) indriya-saMlInatA, (2) noindriya-saMlInatA. (1) jema kAcabo potAnAM aMgopAMga gopavIne rahe che, tevI rIte sAdhaka AtmAo potAnAM aMgopAMga gopavIne rahe. arthAt zarIranuM ane indriyonuM nimprayojana halana-calana na kare. zakya prayatnathI kAyasthiratA rAkhe. zabda-35-2sa-gaMdha ane sparzanA viSayomAM jatI indriyone roke. AnuM nAma indriya-saMlInatA. 232 mayamAM For Private And Personal Use Only

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(2) "no-indriya' eTale mana. jevI rIte indriyonI saMlInatAnuM tapa karavAnuM che evI rIte mananI saMsInatAnuM tapa karavAnuM che. ArtadhyAna ane rodra dhyAnathI mukta mana saMlana kahevAya. jyAre manamAM krodha hoya, mAna hoya, mAyA hoya ane lobha hoya tyAre te mana saMlIna nathI hotuM. ugni ane azAMta hoya che. sAdhaka AtmA krodhAdi kaSAyono udaya ja roke. arthAt krodhAdi kaSAyo manamAM praveze ja nahIM; e rIte manane zAna-dhyAna ane cAritranI ArAdhanAmAM joDeluM rAkhe. te chatAM pramAdathI ke asAvadhAnIthI kaSAyo manamAM AvI jAya to tene upazAMta karavAnA upAyo kare. kAyAthI e kaSAyo abhivyakta thaI jAya to kSamA, namratA, saraLatA ane nirlobhatAthI enuM vAraNa kare. AnuM nAma noindriya-saMlInatA. tapazcaryAthI karmonI nirjarA thAya che, te karIne Atmavizuddhi prApta karavAnI jhaMkhanAvALA sAdhakoe A bAhya tapa Acaravu joIe. have tamane cha prakAranA abhyatara tapa samajAvuM chuM. pahelo prakAra che prAyazcitta. jenAthI cittazuddhi thAya tene prAyazcitta kahevAya. sadgurunAM caraNomAM vinayapUrvaka namratApUrvaka potAnAM pApo prakAzita karavAM, aticAro pragaTa karavA ane e sAMbhaLIne gurudeva je prAyazcitta Ape te vahana karavuM, ane prAyazcitta-tapa kahevAmAM Ave che. bIjo prakAra che dhyAna. ArtadhyAna ane raudradhyAnano tyAga, te paNa tapazcaryA che. "cittanirodharUpa dhyAna'ne tapa kahevAya che. evI rIte, dharma dhyAna ane zukla dhyAnamAM ekAgratA anubhavatuM citta paNa dhyAna che ane te tapa che. dharma dhyAnanA cAra prakAra batAvavAmAM AvyA che : (1) AjJA vicaya, (2) apAya vicaya, (3) vipAka vicaya ane, (4) saMsthAna vicaya. he rAjA! A cAra prakAro tamane mayaNA samajAvaze. zukla dhyAnano saraLa artha che : jenAthI zArIrika ane mAnasika duHkha, zoka, saMtApano nAza thAya tene "zukla" kahevAya. te zukla dhyAna paNa cAra prakAranuM hoya che : (1) pRthakatva-vitarka savicAra, (2) ekatva-vitarkaavicAra, (3) sUkSmakriyA-apratipAtI, (4) bhUpatakriyA-anivRtti. rAjA! A cAra prakAro paNa tamane mayaNA samajAvaze. mayaNA 233 For Private And Personal Use Only

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zukla dhyAnanA pahelA be prakAranA aMte jIvAtmA kevaLajJAnI bane che. chellA be prakAronA aMte AtmA ekarmA bane che. siddha mukta banI jAya che. trIjo prakAra che vezyAvRtya veyAvRtya eTale sevA. munijanoe khUba namratAthI ane prasannacittathI A veyAvRtya-tapa karavAnuM che. AcArya, upAdhyAya, bImAra, bAlamuni AdinI zarIrasevA karavI, emanA mATe bhikSA, pANI, vastra-pAtra lAvI ApavAM vagere sevA kare, evI rIte gRhastho paNa mAtA-pitAnI ane gurujanonI ucita sevA kare, te vezyAvRtya-tapa kahevAya. cotho prakAra che vinaya, jeo vinaya karavAne yogya che, temano vinaya karavAthI pApakarmono nAza thAya che, mATe vinayane tapa kahevAya che. pUjya puruSo Ave tyAre UbhA thavuM, mastake aMjali joDavI, caraNa dhovA, besavA Asana ApavuM vagere vinayanA aneka prakAro che. pAMcamo prakAra che vyutsarga. vyutsarga eTale tyAga. mithyAdarzanono anurAga tyajavAno che ane kaSAyone tyajavAnA che. kAyAnI mAyAno tyAga karavAno che. ane sthira thaI kAusagna karavAno che. A tyAga paNa tapazcaryA ja che. chaThTho prakAra che svAdhyAya. zAstrIsvAdhyAya - adhyayana - parizIlana atyaMtara tapa che. A svAdhyAya-tapanA pAMca prakAro che : (1) vAcanA : saddagurunI pAsethI vinayapUrvaka sUtrArtha grahaNa karavA. (2) pRcchanA : saMdeha dUra karavA vinayapUrvaka prazna pUchavA. (3) anuprekSA : manamAM zAstra-tattvonuM. anuciMtana karavuM. (4) AmnAya : sUtrapAThanuM zuddhipUrvaka uccAraNa karavuM. (pa) dharmopadeza : dharmatattvono upadeza Apavo. he mahAnubhAva, bAhya tapa atyaMtara tapamAM sahAyaka bane che, eTale atyaMtara tapamAM sahAyabhUta bane eTaluM ja bAhya tapa karavuM joIe. indriyone kSati na pahoMce te rIte bAhya tapa karavAnuM che. tapanuM abhimAna na AvI jAya enI pUrI takedArI rAkhavI joIe. tapathI karmonI nirjara karavAnI che, AtmabhAvane nirmaLa karavAno che - A vAta khAsa yAda rAkhavAnI che." gurudeve "tapapadanI vivecanA pUrNa karI. ame kRtajJatA vyakta karI UbhAM thayAM. anya munivarone vaMdanA karI pauSadhazALAmAMthI bahAra nIkaLyAM. 234 ayamAM For Private And Personal Use Only

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- ' 33 - Aje amArA samagra AvAsamAM siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI maheka bharI hatI. mArA jIvanamAM A nava divaso apUrva, romAMcaka ane sarva zreSTha vItyA hatA. gahana saMyama, vidhivat navapada-ArAdhanA, ekAgratApUrvaka gurudevanA zrImukhe nava parama tattvonuM zravaNa... romaroma vikasI jatA evI prabhubhakti... dharmacarcA ane tattvaciMtana... mAruM samagra astitva agocara AnaMdathI plAvita thaI gayuM hatuM. mArA mananI bhItaramAMthI eka gahana gaMbhIra avAja mane saMbhaLAyA kare che. jema jema huM manathI nirdhAra karIne e avAjane rUMdhavAno prayatna karuM chuM tema tema vAyunA susavATAnI eka thapATathI agninI jvAlA bujhAtAM pahelAM jorathI bhaDakI UThe tema e avAja jANe mane ThokI ThokIne kahe che: "maNA! tArA jIvananI kathA saune kahe, saune samajAya evI bhASAmAM Aja tuM saune kahI de. tArA jIvananI AjanI paristhiti paNa evI ja che." loko kahe che "mayaNA, teM tAruM jIvana eka phATeluM cIMtharuM karI nAMkhyuM che!' kahe, gaLuM phADIne kahe ke cIMtharuM na hatuM, e to jarInA tAMtaNe gUMthAyeluM eka najAkata rAjavastra hatuM. kevaLa paristhitinI krUra kAMTALI vADamAM ujharaDA paDI paDIne e cIMtharehAla thaI gayuM hatuM. paNa have e cIMtharehAla nathI, suMdara akhaMDa ramaNIya rAjavastra che.. joI lo Akho kholIne! kALanA bhayaMkara jhaMjhAvAtanI sAme ekalA jhajhUmatAM phATI gayelAM rAjavastronuM mUlya kaMI ochuM nathI. have saune ughADI AMkhe jovA de! kAna kholIne sAMbhaLavA de! hA, suMdara AdarzakathA sAMbhaLyA pachI bIjI ja kSaNe e kathAne atyaMta AsAnIthI, bephikarAIthI bhUlI janArA A pAgala saMsArane zuM tArI A kathA kyAreya halabalAvI mUkaze kharI? e kathAmAM eTaluM sAmarthya che kharuM? are, A zuM kevaLa kathA che? nA, A to eka mahAna satya che! ane mANA 235 For Private And Personal Use Only

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satya, zrotA ke draSTAnI icchAno vicAra kyAreya karatuM nathI. e to sadAya enA mULa svarUpe UgatA sUryanI jema ja ApaNI samakSa AvIne UbhuM rahe che! huM to kevaLa jIvananA chellA zvAsa sudhI siddhAMta mATe laDanArI ane gurudevane samarpita, siddhacakrajInI parama upAsikA ane mArA rANAnI eka rANI rUpe rahIza. vRkSa batAvelIthI ane pazupaMkhIthI vIMTaLAyeluM nisarga devatAnI godamAM lapAyeluM vizALa nagara ujjayinI! cakora, cAtaka, koyala, bhAradvAja, sAraMga Adi asaMkhya pakSIonA madhura kalaravathI prAta:kALe ALasa maroDatI huM jAgI jatI.. joke bAlyakALanI e smRti keTalI badhI AkarSaka hoya che! smRtimAtrathI kSiprA-mAtAno kSitija sudhI vistarelo paTa AMkha sAme AvI jAya che. zubhra nIla jalanuM kSitija sudhI patharAyeluM vizALa sAmrAjya! e jaLanuM eka eka biMdu mane oLakhe che ane huM paNa eka eka biMdune sArI rIte oLakhuM chuM. A ja kSiprAnA taTa para patharAyelI bhInI retI para doDatA doDatAM mArI nAnI nAnI nirdoSa pagalInAM cihno UpasI AvyAM che. ahIM ja naTakhaTa vAyue mArA uttarIya vastra sAthe cheDachADa karI ene keTalIya vAra mArA aMga parathI uDADI mUkyuM che. bALapaNa eTale? koI ene surekha vyAkhyAmAM bAMdhI zakazo? sau potapotAnI kalpanAthI bALapaNane varNave che. paNa mane pUcho to kahuM ke bALapaNa eTale mukta ane nibaMdha kalpanAonA azvono joDelo eka svairavihArI ratha! dUra sudhI dekhAtuM kSiprAnuM pANI kharekhara nIlagaganane sparzatuM nathI ne? e jovA mATe ratha enI asaMkhya lahero para cakkara lagAvI bIjI ja kSaNe kSitijane AMbavA doDI jAya che, to kyAreka A ratha AkAzamAM TamaTamatA asaMkhya tArA jaDelA che, e nIla chata choDIne pRthvI para Tapa laIne kema nathI TapakatA enI khAtarI karavA aMtarikSamAM e khUba UMcAI sudhI chalAMga mAre che! huM mArA vicAronA rathamAM ghUmatI hatI, tyAM rANA mArI sAme AvIne UbhA. zAMta citte mana bharIne mArI sAme jotA nirdoSabhAve bolyA : 236 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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'devI!' 'kaho nAtha!' 'gaI rAta mane kyAM ya sudhI UMgha AvI nahIM. vicAro doDatA ja rahyA... AkhI rAta paDakhAM pharIne vitAvI.' 'avo to karyo vicAra vAraMvAra satAvato hato?' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'mArA jIvanarakSaka, mArA jIvanasAthI sAtaso mANasono...' 'Apano emanA pratye sAco prema che, nAtha!' A sAco tyAre gaNAze ke jyAre e badhA ja sAthIdAro mArA jevA nIrogI banaze!' 'ApanI icchA, ApanI bhAvanA uttama che, nAtha...' 'zuM teo nIrogI thaI zakaze e parama prabhAvI zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranA snAtrajaLathI?' 'ApanI zraddhA zuM kahe che?' 'nIrogI banI zakaze, avazya banI zakaze! devI, je sukha mane maLyuM e sukha mArA upakArI, mArA jIvanarakSaka mitrone maLavuM ja joIe ne?' emanA A udAtta vicAro sAMbhaLI mAruM mana AnaMdathI UbharAI gayuM... mArI AMkho harSanAM AMsu vahAvavA lAgI. meM kahyuM : 'he svAmInAtha ApaNe ApaNA gurudevane pUchI laIe pachI e kAma karIe.' ame AyaMbila karI lIdhuM hatuM. madhyAhnakALe gurudeva pAse javAnuM nakkI karyuM. trIjA praharanA prAraMbhe ame gurudevanAM caraNomAM pahoMcyAM. vaMdanA karI kuzaLapRcchA karI ame beThAM. 'gurudeva! Ape amArA para parama kRpA karI. Apa ja amArA pitA cho, mAtA cho, sakhA cho... eka kSaNa paNa Apane bhUlI nahIM zakAya. sadaiva hRdayamAM ApanI chabI banI raheze. pro! Apa na maLyA hota to...? e kalpanA dhrujAvI de che. mana bahera mArI jAya che... madhyA gurudeva, have emanA manamAM eka bIjo zubha saMkalpa pragaTyo che...! 'devI, jANuM chuM! A rANA mahApuruSa che. rAjabIja che. e kRtajJa puruSa che. e emanA jIvanarakSaka sAtaso kuSTharogIone nIrogI karavA icche che ne?' huM ane rANA ekabIjAne joI AzcaryamAM DUbI gayAM! 'gurudevane A For Private And Personal Use Only 237

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vAtanI khabara kevI rIte paDI gaI?' gurudevanA mukha para maMda maMda hAsya ramatuM hatuM.. gurudeva, Apa aMtaryAmI cho..." mayaNA, rANAnI icchA saphaLa thaze. AvatIkAle tamAre sAtaso mANasone chAMTI zakAya eTaluM snAtrajaLa taiyAra karIne laI javAnuM. jyAM teo che, tyAM jaIne tamane je vidhi batAvuM te vidhithI snAtrajaLa dareka kuSThI para chAMTavAnuM. e nIrogI banI jaze. sAMgopAMga thaI jaze! ane e sAtaso puruSo bhaviSyamAM A rANAnA ja sahayogI banaze!" meM ane rANAe vicAryuM : gurudeva divyadraSTA che. AryAvartanA zreSTha jJAnIpuruSa che! ame gurudevane praNAma karyA, anubhava karI rahI hatI ke jANe hRdaya sAva haLavuM phUla jevuM thaI gayuM che. lalitA savAre vahelI AvI gaI hatI. traNa moTA ghaDA pANI lAvavAnuM hatuM. meM lalitAne pUnamanA divase ja sUcanA ApI dIdhI hatI ke eka dAsIne sAthe laI Ave eTale kAmakAjamAM saraLatA rahe. pANI ane pANImAM nAMkhavAnAM viziSTa dravyo AvI gayAM hatAM. ame snAna karI, pUjAnAM vastro paherI pUjAgRhamAM pravezyAM. Aje lalitAne paNa pUjAmAM besADavAnI hatI. eTale ame traNeyae pahelAM bhagavAna RSabhadevanI ratnamaya pratimAnuM aSTaprakArI pUjana karyuM. pachI zrI siddhacakrajInI snAtravidhi zarU karI. lagabhaga be ghaTikA sudhI ame snAtrAbhiSeka pUrNa karI, traNa svaccha ne suMdara ghaDAomAM snAtrajaLa bharyuM, enA para zrIphaLa mUkIne rezamI vastra bAMdhyuM. siddhacakrajInI ame aSTaprakArI pUjA karI ane lalitA pAse karAvI. enA AnaMdano pAra na hato. te harSathI gadgad hatI. pUjA pUrNa karIne stavanA karIne, ame pUjAkhaMDanI bahAra AvyAM. meM rANAne kahyuM: ApaNe A snAtrajaLanA ghaDA laIne atyAre ja ApanA sAtaso sAthIdAro pAse pahoMcI jaIe. pachI AvIne nava AyaMbilanuM pAraNuM karIzuM!' temaNe saharSa saMmati ApI. ame pUjAnAM vastromAM ja pANInA traNa ghaDA laIne nIkaLI paDyAM. meM, lalitAe ane enI dAsIe eka-eka ghaDo mAthe 238 mayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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laI lIdho. rANA AgaLa ane ame pAchaLa. jaMgalanI keDIe cAlatAM jANe ame UDI rahyAM hatAM! ame upakArIonA upakArano kiMcit badalo vALavA jaI rahyAM hatAM. ame sukhI thayAM to amArA sAthIo paNa sukhI thavA joIe." A udAtta bhAvanAne laIne ame doDI rahyAM hatAM. ame e lokonA paMDAvanI najIka pahoMcyAM tyAM durgadha AvavA lAgI. lalitAe mArI sAme joyuM.. pelI dAsIe paNa eka hAthe nAka dAkhyuM. lalitAne kahyuM : "mArI sakhI, ApaNe jemanA kAma mATe jaI rahyA chIe e sAtaso kuSTharogIono paDAva najIka Avyo che. enI A durgadha che... Aje e durgadha dUra thaI jaze... lalitA, Aje rANAnA e sAtaso ya sAthIdAro zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranA prabhAve nIrogI banI jaze! temanAM gaLI gayelAM, saDI gayelAM, kharI paDelAM aMga-upAMga navAM AvI jaze!' oho! ghaNuM sAruM! sAtaso mANaso para parama upakAra thaze... emane navuM jIvana maLaze!" lalitA hAMphatI hAMphatI bolI. mAthe snAtrajaLa bharelo ghaDo hato! e thAkI gaI hatI. ema to mArI Doka paNa du:khatI hatI paNa harSanA AvegamAM e duHkha lAgatuM na hatuM. ame have paDAvanI najIka pahoMcyAM hatAM. tyAM to dUrathI e lokoe amane AvatAM joI lIdhA ane cAra pAMca AdheDavayanA puruSo sAme doDI AvyA! temaNe mane oLakhI lIdhI! paNa rANAne na oLakhyA! teo mane, lalitAne ane dAsIne jovA lAgyA...AgaLa UbhA rahelA tejasvI suMdara yuvakane joI teo vicAramAM paDI gayA... devI! Apa padhAryA? amArA rANA....?' ne pelo tejasvI suMdara yuvaka khaDakhaDATa hasI paDyo! meM Aje emane pahelI vAra ja A rIte mukta manathI hasatA joyA! teo bolyA : cAlo AgaLa. tamArA rANA tamArA paDAvamAM tamane maLaze!' ame tvarAthI paga upADyA... pelA mANaso to doDatA gayA ane paDAvamAM bUmAbUma karI mUkI... rAja kumArI AvyAM che! rAjakumArI AvyAM che... sahu medAnamAM bhegAM thAo! ame tyAM eka gheghUra vRkSanI nIce jaIne zuddha jagA joIne ghaDA nIce amA 239 For Private And Personal Use Only

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mUkyA. ame traNeya besI gayA. rANA UbhA rahyA. thoDI ja vAramAM sAtaso kuSTharogI tyAM bhegA thaI gayA. sahu dhArIdhArIne rANAne jotA hatA... ane emanA rANAne zodhatA hatA... mane joIne praNAma karatA hatA. tyAM javAnasiMha AgaLa Avyo. subhASakAkA paNa najIka AvyA. bIjA paNa temanA be paricita mitro AgaLa AvyA. subhASakAkAe mane pUchayuM : devI! amArA rANA nathI AvyA?' AvyA che ne!' "kyAM che?' "A UbhA che e ja tamArA rANA!' ane sahu AMkho pahoLI karI AzcaryathI moM pahoLA karI temane joI rahyA... subhASakAkA to bheTavA jatA hatA, paNa aTakI gayA... "nA, nA, mAro cepa lAgI jAya!' javAnasiMha ekadama pAse jaIne Ubho rahyo. meM sahune saMbodhIne kahyuM : bhAIo, tame sahu besI jAo. huM tamane tamArA rANAnAM darzana karAvuM chuM." sahu besI gayA. huM rANA pAse jaIne UbhI rahI. meM e lokone saMbodhIne A ja tamArA uMbarANA che! bhagavAnanI dayAthI ane gurudevanI kRpAthI temano kuSTharoga maTI gayo che. temanuM zarIra pUrNa nIrogI banyuM che... badhAM ja aMgopAMga navAM AvI gayAM che... tame emane pratyakSa joI zako cho!' devajI! A badho upakAra tamAro che...' subhASakAkA harSanAM AMsu vahAvatA bolI UThyA. "nA, nA, upakAra badho ja gurudevano che. tamane mArA e gurudevanAM darzana karAvIza, paNa e pahelAM tamane sahune paNa nIrogI karavAnI bhAvanAthI rANA ahIM AvyA che! rANA che ne! eTale prajAne sukhI to karavI ja paDe ne! e ekalA sukhI thAya, ema kema cAle? eTale bIjI badhI vAto pachI karIzuM. pahelAM tame A medAnamAM pacAsa/pacAsanI paMktimAM besI jAo. palAMThI vALIne besI jAo, javAnasiMha, badhAne paMktibaddha besADI do. pachI tamAre AMkho baMdha karI "trAumadevAya nama:' bolatA rahevAnuM. ame 240 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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' nA .' tamArA upara pANI chAMTatA rahIzuM... tamAre AMkho kholavAnI nahIM. huM kahuM tyAre ja AMkho kholavAnI." badhA pacAsa-pacAsanI paMktimAM besI gayA. medAnanI cAre bAju vRkSo hatAM eTale sUryano prakAza parNomAMthI caLAIne Avato hato. pavana paNa zItala hato. ame zrI siddhacakrajInuM be kSaNa dhyAna karI, ghaDo kholyo. kaLazamAM pANI bharyuM. be kaLaza hatA. eka kaLaza meM lIdho, bIjo rANAe lIdho . ane eka paMktimAM emaNe jalachaMTakAva zarU karyo, bIjI paMktimAM meM jalachaMTakAva zarU karyo... lalitA ane dAsa amane kaLazo bharIbharIne ApatI jatI hatI... jANe yakSarAja vimalezvara ane devI cakezvarI hAjara hoya, evo divya prakAza medAna para chavAI gayo. "nRpamavevAya nama:'no samUha maMtroccAra araNyane mukhara karI rahyo hato. ame "zrI siddhava vidhAtu sauraLam' bolatAM jatAM hatAM ane snAtrajaLa chAMTatAM jatA hatAM. jANe AkAzamAMthI, divya dhvani relAto hoya... kusumavRSTi thatI hoya tevo AbhAsa thato hato. lagabhaga be ghaTikAmAM samagra kAryakrama pUro thayo. ame paNa zrI siddhacakrajInuM dhyAna karatAM UbhAM rahyAM... thoDI vAre lalitA bolI UThI : mayaNA! mayaNA.. jo to... A AgaLanI paMktimAM beThelA mANasonA hAtha-paga sArA thaI gayA.. emanA nAka... kAna... badhuM sAruM thaI gayuM... emanA zarIranI cAmaDI paNa sArI thaI gaI. koI DAgha na rahyo... saMpUrNa zarIra sAruM thaI gayuM..." aho! devI... zrI siddhacakrajIno Avo divyaprabhAva! A te kevo camatkAra! mArI sakhI... mane to Aje ja siddhacakrajI phaLyA! meM Aje pUjA karI ane Aje ja A adbhuta prabhAva jovA maLyo..." huM ane rANA, amArI pAchaLa lalitA ane dAsI... ame badhI paMktiomAM dareka mANasa para dRSTi nAMkhatAM AgaLa vadhyAM. gurudevanA kathana mujaba pariNAma AvyuM hatuM! 700 ye rogI puruSo nIrogI banI gayA hatA. meM moTethI bolIne jAhera karyuM : he bhAIo, tame tamArI AMkho kholo. tame tamArA zarIra juo. tame sahu nIrogI banI gayA cho! tamArAM kharI paDelAM, saDI gayelAM aMgopAMga mayaNA 241 For Private And Personal Use Only

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navAM AvI gayAM che... bhagavAna RSabhadevano ane gurudeva municandrasUrijIno A prabhAva che!" sahue AMkho kholI. potAnAM ane bIjAnAM zarIra jovA lAgyA. AzcaryathI, AnaMdathI ane harSAtirekathI teo UbhA thaIne nAcavA lAgyA! amArI cAreya bAju temaNe nAcavAnuM zarU karyuM... ame.. emAMya rANA to ati harSita hatA. huM A vRttAMta amArI maDhulImAM besIne mArI sAsu rANI kamalaprabhAne saMbhaLAvI rahI hatI. rANA paNa hAjara ja hatA. jyAM A 700 sahayogIonI vAta cAlI ke vAtano dora temaNe pakaDI lIdho ane temaNe vRttAMta kahevA mAMDyo. mA, te divase e sAtaso ya sAthIoe tyAM bhegA maLIne rAjasabhAnuM dRzya UbhuM karI dIdhuM! temanAmAMthI ja je o hRSTapuSTa puruSo hatA teo rAjasabhAmAM kozapAla, azvapAla, senApati, amAtya saciva vagere pAtro bhajavavA taiyAra thayA hatA. zI khabara... rAjasabhAnI jANakArI temaNe kyAMthI meLavI haze? medAnamAM eka khAsso moTo paththara hato. ene rAjasiMhAsana banAvyuM. mane temaNe siMhAsana para besADyo. mayaNAne mArI pAse ja besADI. lalitA ane dAsIne mayaNAnI pAchaLa UbhI rAkhI, atyaMta AdarathI jhUkIne subhASakAkA bolyA : "caMpAnagarInA adhipati zrIpAla mahArAjano..' saue harSollAsathI sAda dIdho - "jaya ho!' sau nIce besI gayA. mAro have chUTako ja nahoto. AthI huM rAjAnI Dhabe bolyo : amAtya, sabhAnuM kAmakAja zarU karavAnI anujJA ApavAmAM Ave che!' amAro A ramatotsava barAbara jAmyo hato, eTalAmAM bAjumAM caratA pazuomAMthI eka khaDatala Akhalo jayajayakAranA avAjathI bhaDakyo. eNe enI jADI pUMchaDI UMcI TaTTAra karI avAjanI dizA tarapha kAna mAMDyA. nasakorAM phulAvato ane ziMgaDAM bharAvato, kAnane UMcA karato sIdho amArI tarapha dhasyo. enuM vikarALa rUpa joIne subhASakAkA bhAgyA... e hAtha UMcA karIne moTethI bolyA : "mahArAjA, bhAgI... bhAgo.... saMkaTa.." samAcAra cAreya bAju phelAI gayA. mayaNA mAro hAtha pakaDI mane kheMcavA 242 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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lAgI. paNa huM phaTAka daIne paththara para akkaDa Ubho rahI gayo. devIne UMcakIne mArI pAchaLa UbhI rAkhI. jhaMjhAvAta sama e Akhalo amArI tarapha dhasyo. enI AMkhomAMthI aMgArA jharatA hatA.. aDapheTamAM Ave ene lAta mArIne enAM cIMtharecIMtharAM uDADI nAkhavA enA magajanI nasenasa taNAtI hatI. enA moMmAMthI lALa TapakatI hatI. paththara pAse AvIne e saheja vAra Ubho rahyo. AgaLanA paganI kharIthI khararara mATI khodI ane zigaDAM UMcAM karI dhAradAra bANanI jema ekAeka UchaLyo! meM kSaNabhara AkAza sAme mITa mAMDI. vimalezvara yakSa ane cakezvarI devI zrI siddhacakrane laIne UbhAM hatAM. meM mastaka namAvyuM. zrI siddha taddauM namA"i bolyo ane mayaNAne pAchaLa dhakelI daI bIjI ja kSaNe meM mArA hAthanI majabUta pakaDamAM AkhalAnAM ziMgaDAM ja kaDI lIdhAM! mayaNAe "o svAmInAtha." evI cIsa pADI te saMbhaLAI, pachI zuM zuM thayuM te mane spaSTa yAda nathI. paraMtu mane ulALI mAravA jema jema e pahelavAna Akhalo joradAra jhIMka mArato hato tema tema baMne hAthanI pakaDa enAM ziMgaDAMne joradAra bhIMsamAM letI hatI. mane lAgyuM ke mAruM zarIra jANe agnimAM zekAIne rathacakranA lohanI jema tapI gayuM che! pachI mayaNA kyAM hatI, lalitA kyAM hatI... enI mane saheje khabara na hatI. huM jAgyo tyAre medAnamAM paDyo hato. mAruM mastaka mayaNAnA khoLAmAM hatuM. bAjumAM subhASakAkA ane badhA ja 700 sAthIdAro UbhA hatA. AkhalAnA mAlikanA hAthamAM AkhalAnI rAza hatI. thoDI vAra pahelAM lAlaghUma DoLA phADIne UchaLato Akhalo atyAre thAkIne hAMphato hato. enA moMmAMthI phINa nIkaLatuM hatuM. meM AMkho kholIne joyuM. mayaNA ekITase mane joI rahI hatI. enA mukha para hAsyanI lahera camakatI hatI. mane ekAeka rAjasabhA yAda AvI! mane vicAra Avyo ke ekAeka mArA dehamAM ATalI virATa zakti kyAMthI AvI? ane bIjI ja kSaNe e kyAM cAlI gaI? huM tarata beTho thayo. mane kyAM vAgyuM che e jovA mArA zarIrane tapAsyuM. deha para eka nAno ujharaDo paNa na hato. huM Ubho thayo. pAse UbhelA AkhalA para eka camacamAvIne thapATa mArI. enAM rUMvADAM bhayathI thatharI UThyAM! pUMchaDAne saMkorato mArI pAsethI bhAgyo. mayaNa 243 For Private And Personal Use Only

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kAryakrama pUro thayo hato. A badhA sAthIdArone bhagavAna RSabhadevanAM darzana karAvuM. pachI gurudeva pAse laI jAuM ane oLakhANa karAvuM ke - "A badhA mArA prANarakSako che! jIvanarakSako che! mane prema karanArA che. mane cAhanArA che. gurudeva! ApanI kRpAthI teo nIrogI thaI gayA... sukhI thaI gayA! emanuM jIvana dhanya banI gayuM" deva-gurunAM darzana karI te sAtasone ame suMdara vastronI eka-eka joDI ApI. bhAthuM ApyuM ane darekane pota-potAnA ghera javAnI AjJA karI. pachI amane ApanAM darzana kyAre thaze?' subhASakAkAe pUchuyuM. huM bolAvIza tamane badhAne! huM tamane jIvanaparyata nahIM bhUlI zakuM. mArAM mAtAne paNa tamArI vAta karIza.. e tamArI dharmanI bahena che ne! Avaze ahIM! kyAreka ahIM Avazo to enAM darzana paNa thaI jaze." AMkhomAM... eka AMkhamAM harSa ane bIjI AMkhamAM virahanuM duHkha laI e sAtaso sAthIdArone premabharI vidAya ApI. ame amArI maDhulImAM AvI gayAM hatAM. thAkI gayAM hatAM. huM to AvatAM ja palaMgamAM lAMbo thaIne paDI gayo. mArA manamAM eka ja vicAra ghUmarAto hato. be kalAka sudhI rAnI pazano sAmano karyo to paNa mArA aMga para eka paNa ujharaDo nahIM! meM mayaNAne pUchyuM. teNe kahyuM : "A ja zrI siddhacakrajIno prabhAva che. tamAruM zarIra zastrothI apratihata raheze!" eTale huM ghAyala nahIM thAuM? paNa maravAno ya nahIM?' "nA! amara koI nathI rahetuM. mRtyu to nizcita ja che. paraMtu siddhacakrajInA prabhAve AvA divya ghaNA anubhavo Apane thatA raheze. eTaluM ja nahIM, zrI siddhacakrajInA dhyAnamAM paNa avanavA anubhavo thatA raheze." haju ame pAraNuM karyuM na hatuM. pAraNuM yAda paNa AvyuM na hatuM! sUrya astAcaLa tarapha jaI rahyo hato. lalitAe dUdha garama karI dIdhuM. thoDAMka phaLa paNa dAsI laI AvI hatI. ame dUdhathI ne phaLothI pAraNuM karI dIdhuM. hRdayamAM jeTalo AnaMda hato, tethI vadhAre zarIramAM thAka hato. ame pathArImAM paDatAMnI sAthe ja nidrAdhIna thaI gayAM. 244 ayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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38 meM mArI sAsu kamalaprabhAne kahyuM : 'mAtAjI! Aja sudhIno samagra vRttAMta ame Apane kahI saMbhaLAvyo che. have Apa amArI sAthe ja cho. have je ghaTanAo banavAnI che, temAM ApanI hAjarI rahevAnI ja che.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir kamalaprabhAe kahyuM : beTI, ATalI nAnI uMmaramAM teM meru jeTalo bhAra vahana karyo che. te mArA lAlane nIrogI to karyo ja, sAthe sAthe paramAtmAno bhakta karyo. gurudevano prItipAtra karyo ane zrI siddhacakrajIno parama ArAdhakaupAsaka karyo. ene zraddhAvAnu, jJAnavAna ane cAritravAn karyo! sAce ja beTI, teM mane paNa jinamArganI upAsikA banAvI dIdhI! sAco mokSamArga batAvyo. tuM mArI putravadhU ja nahIM, putrI ja nahIM, mArI guru paNa banI che! beTI, have putrane huM zrIpAla ja kahIza. tAre paNa e ja nAmano upayoga karavAno! Ama to e caMpAnagarIno rAjA ja che! eno rAjyAbhiSeka thayelo hato!' mANA 'mA! e badhuM bhUlI jA! huM eka kuSTharogI hato... ne have eka rAjakumArIno bhattara banyo che. eNe mane sAco manuSya banAvyo che! devaguru-dharmano upAsaka banAvyo che! basa, ATalI ja oLakhANa pUratI che...!' meM kahyuM : 'mAtAjI, AvatI kAlathI roja ApaNe prabhAte zrI RSabhaprAsAdamAM prabhudarzana mATe jaIzuM. barAbara ne?' 'avazya, ApaNe traNeya sAthe jaIzuM!' 'pachI gurudevane vaMdana karavA pauSadhazALAmAM jaIzuM!' 'jaIzuM! darzana karIne pAvana thaIzuM!' kAryakrama pharI gayo hato. gharamAM bhagavaMtanuM pUjana ane zrI siddhacakrajInuM pUjana, derAsara upAzrayethI AvyA pachI karavAnuM nakkI karyuM jethI utAvaLa na karavI paDe, roja ema ja cAlyuM. For Private And Personal Use Only 245

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ame eka divase vahelI savAre derAsare javA nIkaLI gayAM. derAsaramAM pahoMcIne vidhipUrvaka darzana karyA. pachI raMgamaMDapamAM paramAtmAnI bhAvapUjA karavA beThAM. huM AgaLa beThI hatI. mArI saheja pAchaLa eka bAju zrIpAla ane bIjI bAju kamalaprabhA beThAM hatAM. jAvuM ghaNuM ye dUra manavA jAvuM ghaNuM ye dUra... jhaMjhAvAto AvyA manavA, hoDI thaI gaI cUra anaMtayAtrA zivanI manavA, saMkaTathI bharapUra jinavara! banavuM zUra jAvuM ghaNuM ye dUra sAthI AvyA koIka manavA kaiMka dhIra ne vIra koI rahyA ne pAchA gyA koI, manamAM thaI majabUra prabhuvara! Apo premanAM pUra jAvuM ghaNuM ye dUra dIse kinAro, nahIM ovAra, jAvuM dUra-sudUra, Avo sukAnI! hiMmata rAkhI, haiye zraddhA-sUra jAvuM ghaNuM ye dUra.. raMgamaMDapanA eka thAMbhalAne aDhelIne UbhelI eka rUpavatI jAjaramAna nArI mayaNAnI stavanAne nahotI sAMbhaLatI... paNa mayaNAnI pAchaLa lagabhaga aDIne beThelA rUpa-lAvaNyathI bharapUra yuvAnane joI rahI hatI! mayaNA enI putrI hatI... e rANI rUpasuMdarI hatI. tenA manamAM tumula kolAhala jAgyo hato... "mArI putrI, zuM eNe svecchAe paraNelA kuSTharogIne tyajI daI, A bIjA yuvAnane paraNI gaI? zuM enA badhA Adarzo havAmAM UDI gayA? karmasiddhAMta parano eno vizvAsa DagI gayo ke viSayasukhanI vAsanAe ene bhramita karI dIdhI? zuM eNe bIjo vara karIne mArI kUkha lajAvI? kuLane kalaMkita karyuM? e to duniyAmAM upahAsapAtra banaze, huM paNa upahAsapAtra banIza. enI khAtara to mahela choDyo, mahArAjAno tyAga karyo. are, jyAre mahArAjA jANaze ke mayaNAe kuSTharogI patino tyAga karI bIjAM lagna karyA che, tyAre teo paNa duHkhI thaI jaze. karmasiddhAMtano tiraskAra karaze. dharmanI vAtone khoTI mAnI leze... aho, dhikkAra che mane, 246 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #256
ke meM AvI kulakalaMkinI putrIne janma Apyo.." rUpasuMdarI raDI paDI. enuM rudana mayaNAnA kAne paDyuM. stavanA pUrNa thaI gaI hatI. teNe potAnI mAtAne oLakhI. tene raDatI joI... e UbhI thaI.. utAvaLI utAvaLI mAtAnI pAse jaI, enA be hAtha pakaDI.. enI AMkhomAM AMkho parovIne bolI : mArI mA, harSita thavAnA badale tuM du:khI kema thaI gaI? paramAtmAnI aciMtya kRpAthI ane gurudevanA parama anugrahathI amArAM badhAM duHkhadurbhAgya dUra thaI gayAM che! mA, jinamaMdiramAM saMsAranI vAto na karAya. te karavAthI AzAtanA lAge. mATe ame rahIe chIe e ghare tuM Ava. tyAM badhI vAta tuM sAMbhaLIza to harSathI nAcI UThIza tArI putrI zuM koI khoTuM kAma kare kharI?' beTI, huM atyAre ja tArI sAthe tArA ghera AvuM chuM! jIvanamAM aneka prasaMgo bane che. mANasa game teTaluM maLe to paNa te badhA prasaMgo yAda rAkhavA muzkela hoya che. paraMtu keTalAka prasaMgo bhUlavA mathIe to paNa bhulAtA nathI. pANImAM magare pakaDelo zikAra e kyAreya choDavA taiyAra hoto nathI tema mana paNa evA viziSTa prasaMgane bhUlavA taiyAra hotuM nathI. mananI maMjUSAmAM AvA aneka mulAyama ane khaDabacaDA prasaMgonAM vastro pahelAM hoya che... Aje evI eka maMjUSA khUlavAnI che. e maMjUSA che caMpAnI vidhavA rANI kamalaprabhAnI. paraMtu e pahelAM huM mArI mAtA sAthe thoDI vAto karI lauM! kAraNa ke e snehamayI, karuNAmayI, sauMdaryamayI mArI jananI che. annapUrNAnI jema paripUrNa ane dharitrInI jema sarva sahanArI, mUrti jevI stabdha, vismita pazcAttApabharI ane mugdha dRSTithI mane joI rahI hatI. meM namIne mAno caraNasparza karyo. jharatA phUlane jhIlI letI hoya ema komaLa hAthe mane prayatnapUrvaka UbhI karI.... kSINa ane pazcAttApabharyA avAje bolI: beTI, meM tArA mATe khoTA vicAra karyA... mane kSamA...." meM mAnA mukhe hAtha mUkI bolatI baMdha karI, tyAM to zrIpAle AvIne mAne praNAma karyA. "mA, A ja e kuSTharogI... tArA jamAI che! emane AzIrvAda Apa." ayA 247 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #257
mArI mA apalaka netre emane joI ja rahI! kAmadeva jevA suMdara... UMcI ne puSTa deha... pahoLuM vakSasthaLa.... nirmaLa netrakamaLa... hAtha-paga-hatheLI. badhuM manorama! viziSTa sauMdaryathI paripUrNa mukha! mA, paramAtmA RSabhadevano parama anugraha thayo... gurudevanI aparaMpAra dayA varasI... teoe zrI siddhacakra-mahAmaMtra ApyuM, enI ArAdhanA karAvI... pariNAme tArA jamAI nIrogI banI gayA. nava divasa AyaMbilano tapa karyuM.. japa karyo... dhyAna karyuM ane badhAM duHkho TaLI gayAM!" ame amArA gharanA madhyakhaMDamAM beThAM hatAM. rANI kamalaprabhA mArI bAjumAM ja beThA hatAM. teo bolyAM : mahArANI! mArI A putravadhUe.. tamArI A lADalI beTIe to mArA kuLano uddhAra karyo che. mArA putrane nIrogI karI amArA para mahAna upakAra karyo che. kharekhara, mane ane mArA A putrane duHkhonA mahAsAgaramAMthI pAra utAryA che. amane jinadharma pamADyo che. sukhanA mAnasarovaramAM taratAM karI dIdhAM che... vadhAre to zuM kahyuM? ghaNA ghaNA janmonuM puNya saMcita thayuM hoya to ja AvI putravadhU maLe!' vaLI, ATalI nAnI uMmaramAM teNe potAnA rAjA-pitA sAthe dharmanA siddhAMta mATe kevo saMgharSa karyo? mahAdevI! tame tamArI A putrIne dhAvaNamAM ja ghaNA ghaNA saMskAro ApelA lAge che. kevuM enuM svaccha ne vizALa hRdaya che! kevI udAratA ne sahiSNutA che! A pRthvI para anupama kahI zakAya evA guNo ane evuM jJAna che tamArI A putrI pAse! tamArI putrIe tamArA vize paNa mane ghaNI vAto karI che.' mArI mA, rANI kamalaprabhA sAme apalaka dRSTie jotI, enI vAto sAMbhaLI rahI hatI. mArI mAne haju mAtA-putrano sAmAjika paricaya maLyo na hato ane e jANavAnI strInI icchA prabaLa hoya che! eTale mA bolI: amArA parama bhAgyodayathI Avo ciMtAmaNi jevo jamAI maLyo che. emane jotAM ja emanA zauryanuM, vIratvanuM, jJAnanuM ane aizvaryanuM anumAna karI lIdhuM... te chatAM he devI! emanuM kuLa, emanuM nagara... emanA vaMza.. vagere jANavAnI mArI tIvra icchA che." kamalaprabhAe mArI sAme joyuM; pachI zrIpAla sAme joyuM ane potAno vRttAMta kahevo zarU karyo. 248 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #258
mahArANI! aMgadezanI rAjadhAnI caMpAnagarI che. e nagarInA rAjA hatA siMhatha. emanI huM rANI kamalaprabhA chuM, koMkaNadezanA rAjA vasupAlanI huM bahena thAuM. mahArAjA rUpavAna hatA, premALa hatA. zUravIra hatA. aparaMpAra rAja vaibhava hato. mane ema lAgatuM hatuM ke huM koI svarganI apsarA chuM ane devendra sAthe sukhabhoga bhogavI rahI chuM! huM pote mArA bhAgya para ovArI jatI hatI. tyAM mane koI vAtanI kamI nahotI. Adara-satkAra, saMpatti, kIrti, pratiSThA mArAM caraNomAM ALoTatAM hatAM. jIvana, mANasa sAthe kyAreka sukhanI raMgapaMcamI rame che. kyAreka sukhano gulAla eTalo badho uDADe che ke jIva ghuMTAvA lAge! hAtha UMcA karI kahevAnuM mana thAya ke basa thaI have A sukhanI choLo!" paraMtu vidhAtA manuSyane saMpUrNa sukha kyAM Ape che? ekAda duHkha evuM Ape che ke e duHkhanI AgaLa badhAM ja sukha tuccha bhAse che, eka divasa mahArAjA mAnasika paritApathI vikSubdha banelA mane lAgyA. meM gabharAtAM gabharAtAM pUchyuM : "Apa Aje udAsa kema cho?" kamala, zuM kahuM tane? nirvazI rAjAnuM A jagatamAM sthAna nathI. to pachI svargalokamAM to hoya ja kyAMthI? mRtyu pachI ene sau bhUlI javAnA. huM koI samrATa nathI, huM to vidhAtAnA rAjyano eka bhikhArI mAtra chuM. mArI sAthe mAruM nAma paNa vilIna thaI javAnuM..." zuM eTale ja Apa ATalA duHkhI cho? ema ja hoya to bhAradvAja RSinA maMtrathI huM Apano vaMzavelo cAlu rAkhavA putranirmANa karIza. RSi bhAradvAje mane eka viziSTa maMtra Apela che. pachI meM mahArAjAne RSinA yajJayAganI Avazyaka mAhitI ApI. teo bolyA : kamala! A siMharathane apayazanA UMDA khADAmAMthI ugAravA mATe ja vidhAtAe tane mArI patnI rUpe mokalI lAge che!" "svAmInAtha! thoDA samayamAM ja A rAjamahelamAM tamane rUparUpano aMbAra putra jovA maLaze!' thoDA divasa bAda eka prAtaHkALe meM Acamana mATe pANI hatheLImAM lIdhuM ane AMkho mIMcI dIdhI. maMtranA zabdo mArA hRdayakuMbhamAM goLagoLa pharavA lAgyA. enA pratyeka uccAre huM dehabhAna bhUlatI gaI. AkhA saMsArano bhAra mayaNA 249 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #259
UMcakatI pRthvInA nAmanuM smaraNa karIne meM yamadevanuM AvAna karyuM. mAruM saMpUrNa aMga eka jyoti banI gayuM. pRthvImAMthI eka jyota AvI ane pelI jyatamAM bhaLI gaI. jatAM jatAM tenuM saMkramaNa karatI gaI. dhIme dhIme huM zuddhimAM AvI. mAro deha tharathara kAMpavA lAgyo. huM phasaDAIne palaMga para besI paDI. te divasathI meM mauna laI lIdhuM. mane ekAMta vAtAvaraNa gamatuM hatuM. pharI eka navuM jIvana zarU thayuM. kramaza: vikasatuM gayuM. yogya samaya AvatAM mane eka divasa savAre veNa UpaDI. huM mAtA banI. eka tejasvI chatAM zAMta mukhAkRtivALA bALakano janma thayo. mahArAjA rAjInA reDa banI gayA. saunA mukha para AnaMda AnaMda chavAI gayo. samagra caMpAnagarI harSanA hiloLe caDhI. gheraghera toraNa baMdhAyAM. prajAe gharo ane dukAno zaNagArI, nagarazreSThIo rAja kumAra mATe bheTaNAM laI rAjamahelamAM AvavA lAgyA. mahArAjAe mana mUkIne dAna ApavA mAMDyuM. jelomAMthI kedIone mukta karAvI dIdhA. duzmanone paNa premathI jItI laI, maitrInA saMbaMdha bAMdhyA. rAjamahela upara asaMkhya dIvA pragaTAvavAmAM AvyA. Dhola-nizAna vAgavA lAgyAM. nagaramAM bhavya AnaMdotsava racAI gayo. nagaramAM core ne cauTe nRtya-nATaka thavA lAgyAM. mahArAjAe svajanone, mitra rAjAone, maMtrImaMDaLane, zreSThIvargane ane jJAtijanone bhojana mATe nimaMtraNa pAThavyAM. bhojanamAM batrIza pakavAnna ane tetrIza vyaMjana pIrasavAmAM AvyAM. te pachI te te saMbaMdhane anurUpa AbhUSaNo, vastro AdithI paherAmaNI karavAmAM AvI. darekane zrIphaLa-puSpa arpaNa karyA. mukhavAsa ApyAM. kesaranAM tilaka karyA ane caMdana-gulAbajaLa chAMTIne sahune khUba AnaMdita karyA. tyAra pachI svajano bhegA maLyA. phoI AvI ane rAjakumAranuM nAma pADayuM zrIpAlakuvara. kamalaprabhAe potAnuM vaktavya cAlu rAkhyuM hatuM. mahArAjAnA sahavAsamAM ane rUpALA rAjakumAranA saMgamAM mArA divaso AnaMdathI pasAra thatA hatA. jIvana kevuM mohaka, AnaMdamaya, romAMcaka ane 2pa0 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #260
udAtta che, enI pratIti thatI hatI. mahArAjAnA sAhacaryathI eka ja bhAva UmaTato hato ane te vizaddha premano! prema ja mananI sauthI prabhAvaka preraNA che. jIvana udAratAthI mArA para sukhanAM puSpo varasAvI rahyuM hatuM. zrIpAla cAra varSano thayo hato. eka divasa teo mRgayA khelavA jaMgalamAM javA taiyAra thayA. mRgayAnI badhI taiyArI thaI gaI hatI. mahArAjA jhaDapathI mahelanI bahAra nIkaLatA hatA, tyAM emanA mastaka parano suvarNajaDita mugaTa daravAjAnA paDadAmAM bharAIne nIce gabaDI paDyo. mArA manamAM bhayanuM mojuM pharI vaLyuM. AgaLa AvI meM tarata ja mugaTa UMcakI laIne kahyuM : "mahArAja, Aja na jAo to na cAle?' 'kamala, strI svabhAve Darapoka hoya che! paraMtu puruSo kRtanizcayI hoya che. huM javAno ja. tuM manamAMthI bhaya kADhI nAMkha, huM kaMI yuddhamAM nathI jato, mAtra mRgayA mATe jAuM chuM.' mastaka para mugaTa caDhAvI te jhaDapathI bahAra nIkaLI gayA. bIjA divase to teo pAchA AvI gayA. paraMtu emano sadAya hasato cahero Aje plAna paDI gayo hato. meM mAnyuM ke vanamAM bhaTakIbhaTakIne thAkI gayA haze. mane joIne teo khuzamijAjamAM AvI jaze, ema samajI huM hasatI hasatI emanI pAse gaI. paraMtu temaNe mArI sAme paNa joyuM nahIM. nIcuM moM karI sIdhA teo potAnA khaMDamAM cAlyA gayA. huM paNa emanI pAchaLa gaI. teo sIdhA ja palaMgamAM cattApATa paDI gayA. huM temanA mAthe hAtha pheravavA lAgI. Apane zuM thAya che?' dhIrethI pUchayuM. peTamAM zuLa bhoMkAya che... sahana nathI thatuM." meM tarata dAsIne bolAvIne, rAjavaidyane bolAvI lAvavA doDAvI. paraMtu vaidyarAja Ave te pahelAM to mAruM saubhAgya naMdavAI gayuM. mahArAjA mRtyu pAmyA. mArA para jANe vajapAta thayo... huM mUchita thaI jamIna para DhaLI paDI. jyAre bhAnamAM AvI tyAre svajanoe mane gherI lIdhI hatI. mahAmaMtrI matisAgara mArI nikaTa beThA hatA. zrIpAla temanA khoLAmAM hato. huM satata vilApa karI rahI hatI.. khAtI na hatI, pItI na hatI. chAtI phATa rudana cAlu hatuM. tyAM mahAmaMtrIe mane kahyuM : mahArANI, have hRdayane majabUta karo. Ama vilApa karatAM rahezo to rAjyanuM zuM thaze? have rAjyanI dhurA Ape saMbhALavAnI che. rAjakumAra nAnA mayaNA rapa1 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #261
che, eTale badhI ja javAbadArI Ape upADavI paDaze.' mane mahAmaMtrInI vAta sAcI lAgI. rAjA vinA rAjasiMhAsana sUnuM rahe ane rAjasiMhAsana sUnuM rakhAya nahIM. meM mahAmaMtrIne vinaMtInA svare kahyuM: "mahAmaMtrIzvara! have rAjyanA ane amArA tame ja AdhAra cho. tame rAja kumAra zrIpAlano rAjyAbhiSeka karAvo, enI AjJA pravartAvo ane tame ja rAjyabhAra saMbhALo. jyAM jarUra lAge tyAM mane pUchI zakazo.' bAra divasano zoka pALavAmAM Avyo. tyAra pachI zubhamuhUrta rAja kumArano rAjyAbhiSeka karavAmAM Avyo. mahAmaMtrI matisAgare rAjyanuM sArI rIte saMcAlana karavA mAMDyuM. rAjyAbhiSeka thaye cha mahinA paNa vItyA na hatA, tyAM eka divasa mahAmaMtrI mArI pAse AvyA. mahArANIjI, mAre ekAMtamAM ApanI sAthe agatyanI vAta karavI che." mahAmaMtrI mArA mATe pitAtulya hatA. mane teo gupta maMtraNAgRhamAM laI gayA ane kahyuM : mahAdevI, tame ajitasenane oLakho cho ne? rAjakumArano e pitarAI kAko, ApaNo duzmana banyo che. teNe rAjya potAnuM karI levA paDyuMtra racyuM che. eNe senApatine phoDI potAne vaza karyo che. rAjamahelanA dareka mANasane phoDIne potAnA karI lIdhA che. e rAjakumAranI hatyA karavA mAMge che. mAro paNa vadha karavA icche che. mahArANI! A mahelamAM, A nagaramAM ApaNuM koI nathI...! mATe Aje rAtre ja tame rAja kumArane laI, A nagarathI dUra dUra cAlyAM jAo... havAmAM ogaLI jAo. ajitasena tamane baMnene zodhavA AkAza-pAtALa eka karaze... paNa tame baMne enA hAthamAM na Avo e rIte jaMgalamAM khovAI jAo.' paNa mahAmaMtrIjI, e ajitasena Apane paNa mAravA icche che ne? Apa zuM karazo?' huM mAro mArga zodhI laIza. Apa ciMtA nA karazo' 'te chatAM, Apane kyAreka maLavuM hoya to...?' 'trakaSi bAdarAyaNanA AzramamAM, magadha dezanI sImA para..." e Azrama to mAro joyelo che ane praSirAjanI mArA para parama kRpA che...' mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #262
"to e Azrama zreSTha che. ajitasena tyAM pahoMcI nahIM zake.' Avazyaka sUcanAo ApI mahAmaMtrI cAlyA gayA. huM stabdha banIne UbhI rahI gaI... sukhanuM sapanuM pUruM thaI gayuM hatuM. du:khanI aMdhArI rAta mArI sAme hatI... chatAM kAyara bane cAle ema na hatuM. rAjamahelamAMthI nagaranI bahAra nIkaLavAno bhUgarbha mArga hato. mane e mArga mahArAjAe batAvelo. mahAmaMtrI paNa jANatA hatA. mAre kumArane laI madhyarAtrinA samaye e bhUgarbha mArge nagaranI bahAra nIkaLI javAnuM hatuM. mArI asahAyatA... pAmaratA para be AMsu TapakI paDyAM. paNa tarata ja mArI aMdara khaLabhaLATa thayo"huM kSatriyANI chuM... vaLI cAritryazIla chuM! mAre putranI rakSA prANanA bhoge paNa karavI ja rahI." kRSNapakSanI caudazanI aMdhArI rAta.... mAre rAtorAta aMgadezanA vikaTa araNyamAM khovAI javAnuM hatuM. rAta pachI dharatI paraparoDhanuM kiraNa phUTaze tyAM sudhI mAre atyaMta gupta sthAnamAM pahoMcI javuM paDaze. mArAM bAkInA jIvananAM badhAM sapanAM dhULamAM maLI gayAM hatAM. IrSALu, ahaMkArI, durAcArI ane rAjyalobhI ajitasenanI bhraSTa buddhie moTo anartha saryo hato. huM dhImA pagale mArA zayanakhaMDa tarapha cAlavA lAgI. mAro lAla zrIpAla palaMgamAM nizcitapaNe UMghato hato. huM enI pAse jaIne beThI e have thoDI ghaDIono ja rAja kumAra hato, mahelavAsI hato.. pachI to zI khabara e ane huM kyAM hoIzuM? mAre putranI sAthe jANe bhaDabhaDa baLatI agnizikhAmAM praveza karavAno hato.. sAgaranA ataLa UMDANa tarapha AgaLa vadhavAnuM hatuM. hiMsaka pazuonA jaMgalamAMthI pasAra thavAnuM hatuM. kSaNabhara huM dhrUjI UThI.. paNa pachI mana makkama karIne, yogya samaya AvatAM, meM zarIra parathI badhA ja alaMkAro utArI nAkhyA. mAtra thoDI sonAmahoronI kothaLI kamare bAMdhI lIdhI. eka tIkSNa charI paNa kamaramAM chupAvI lIdhI. ajaba dRzyothI bharyo che mArA jIvana-nATakano A majAka uDADato aMka! AMsune rokyAM. hRdayane paththara jevuM karyuM ane UMghatA kumArane meM mArA khabhe lIdho. enA para kaththAI raMganI cAdara oDhADI dIdhI ane mahelanA gupta mArgamAM meM praveza karyo. meM mArA upakArI RSi bhAradvAjanuM smaraNa karyuM : gurudeva! mArA putranI rakSA karajo..." mANA 253 For Private And Personal Use Only

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YA huM cAlatI na hatI. jANe doDatI hatI, jarmIna para sUkAM pAMdaDAMnA DhagalA hatA. moTA-nAnA patharAo hatA... kAMTA hatA... gIcogIca vRkSo UgelAM hatAM. pagamAM kAMTA bhoMkAtA hatA. aMdhArAmAM kaMI spaSTa dekhAtuM na hatuM. paNa mArga parathI sarpo... ajagaro... uMdaro... pasAra thatAM lAgatAM hatAM. vAgha, cittA, varu jevAM hiMsaka pazuonI trADo saMbhaLAtI hatI... kyAMka kyAMka AganA bhaDakA thatA... koI bihAmaNI... DarAmaNI AkRtio pragaTa thatI ne adRzya thatI hatI, mArI chAtI dhaUE thatI hatI. 254 Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir rastAmAM nadI AvI, paNa pANI chIMcharuM hatuM. huM nadI UtarI gaI... tyAM jaMgalI vAMdarAMonAM ToLAM vRkSo para kUdAkUda karatAM hatAM... jharaNAM AvyAM... jharaNAMnA kinAre thoDI vAra huM beThI. aruNodaya thavAmAM hato. zrIpAla jAgI gayo hato. jAgatAM ja teNe dUdha mAMgyuM... ne mArI AMkhomAMthI AMsu varasI paDayAM. meM putrane chAtIsaraso dAbIne kahyuM : 'mArA lAla, tane have huM ahIM dUdha kyAMthI ApuM? ApaNe rAjapATa choDyAM... mahela choDyo... badhuM choDyuM... have to ApaNA prANa bacI jAya eTale basa! vatsa, tuM dhIraja rAkha... kaMi ne kaMI khAvA-pIvAnuM maLI jaze...' vaLI meM putrane teDI lIdho ane AgaLa cAlI. aruNodaya thaI gayo hato. rasto dekhAto hato. huM jhaDapathI cAlI rahI hatI... tyAM mane thoDe dUra ghaNA mANaso ane ghaNAM jhUMpaDAM dekhAyAM. huM kaMIka Azvasta thaI. najIka pahoMcI meM joyuM to e kuSTharogIono kAphalo hato! mane joIne, mArA khabhe suMdara bALakane joIne, e loko UbhA rahI gayA. mArI pAse AvyA. temanA AgevAna dekhAtA mANase mane pUchyuM : 'mAtA, tame koI UMcA gharanAM strI lAgo cho, Ama ekalAM kyAM jAo cho?' mAruM gaLuM bharAI AvyuM. AMkho bhInI thai gaI. te joine pelA puruSe kahyuM : 'mAtA, tame nirbhaya raho. tamane koI duHkha hoya to kaho...' huM Azvasta banI ane mAro samagra vRttAMta kahI saMbhaLAvyo. te lokoe For Private And Personal Use Only caNA

Page #264
paraspara vAtacIta karIne tarata ja mane kahyuM : "mahAdevI! tame A khaccara para besI jAo. putrane godamAM laI lo. enA para tamArI ja A cAdara oDhADI do. mane e rIte besADI, mArI cAreya bAju e sAtaso kuSTharogI vIMTaLAI vaLyA. mane khAtarI ja hatI ke savAre ajitasena mane ane kumArane rAjamahelamAM nahIM jue eTale amane zodhI lAvavA cAreya dizAmAM sainikone ravAnA karaze. be ghoDesavAra sainiko ane jyAM hatAM tyAM AvI pahoMcyA. AvIne pUchavA lAgyA : ahIMthI tame eka strIne nAnA bALaka sAthe jatI joI che ke?' nA re, ame joI nathI." amAre tamArA kAphalAmAM tapAsa karavI paDaze.' "karo tapAsa, ame badhA ja kuSTharogI chIe... amane aDazo to tamane paNa kuSTharoga thaze. pachI jevI tamArI icchA...' sainiko gabharAyA. tyAMthI ja pAchA vaLI gayA. mane prabhAtasiMha bAdarAyaNa-AzramamAM pahoMcADI gayo. "A badhI mArI karamakathA meM ahIM AvIne mayaNA-zrIpAlane kahI hatI. Aje puna: tamane kahI che.' pachI tame ATalAM varSo e AzramamAM ja pasAra karyo?" rUpasuMdarIe pUchyuM. hA, tapasvinI banIne tyAM rahI. kulapati dayAnA sAgara che, ane tapasvinI mAtA naMdinI paNa khUba ja sAlasa svabhAvanAM, mRdu, komaLa ane premabharyA zabdothI vAta karanArAM che. hA, manamAM kyAreka pracaMDa tophAno jAgatAM. tene dabAvI daI, jIvana sAthe samAdhAna sAdhI saMtoSa mAnyo hato. asaMtoSano saMtoSa! kyAreka cittabhrama jevuM paNa thaI jatuM... vicAromAM caDhI jatI. vicAronuM kendra mArI putra hato. te kuSTharogathI gherAI gayo hato. huM ene kyAreka kyAreka maLI AvatI... ene jotI ne mAruM haiyuM bhAMgI paDatuM hatuM...' bolatAM bolatAM kimalaprabhAnA gaLe DUmo bAjhayo. rUpasuMdarIe sahAnubhUtibharyA zabdomAM kahyuM : ayA 2papa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #265
'rANI! tamAruM jIvana to mane IrSyA upajAve evuM che. huM je tamArI jagyAe hota to bhAMgI paDI hota. tamArA jevuM svamAnI jIvana jIvanArA keTalA? tame to nAnI uMmare sarvasva gumAvyuM. chatAM vIrAMganA banIne tame jIvana sAthe jaMga kheDelo che. mAre mana to tame koI mahAna vIrAMganA cho.' mArI mAtAe potAnI sADInA cheDAthI mArI sAsunI AMkho lUchI, ane mane kahyuM : "beTI! tuM sAce ja mahAna puNyazALI cho... have du:khanA dahADA gayA... huM ghera jaIne tArA mAmAne badhI vAta karuM chuM. have tamAre ahIM rahevAnuM nathI. mAmA tamane sanmAnapUrvaka levA Avaze! kAraNa ke caMpAnagarInA rAjA-rANIne potAnA mahele laI javAnA che! sAthe caMpAnI rAjamAtA paNa haze! samagra ujjayinI nagarI harSanA hiloLe caDhaze." mAlavadezanI pATanagarI ujjayinInI zobhA devonI amarAvatIne jhAMkhI pADe tevI banI hatI. Aje mayaNAsuMdarIno zrIpAla sAthe sAmatarAjA puyapAlanA rAjamahelamAM pravezotsava hato. eka atyaMta tejasvI rAjaparivAramAM eka navI yazakalagI umerAyAno AnaMda prajAnA haiye samAto na hato, rAjamArgone atyaMta kALajIthI svaccha karIne tenA para jaLachaMTakAva karavAmAM Avyo hato. nagarInI hoMzIlI kanyAoe AkhA rAjamArgane aneka jAtanI raMgoLIothI suzobhita karyo hato. durgane pharatAM AsopAlavanA toraNa ane kAMgare kAMgare dIpAvalio goThavavAmAM AvI hatI. durganA mukhya daravAjA ane rAjamahelanAM pravezadvAra maNimuktAonAM toraNothI ane keLa vagerenA staMbhothI zaNagAravAmAM AvyAM hatAM. zrIpAlamayaNAne vadhAvavA mATe sonA-rUpAnAM puSponA thALa laIne khIlatI. kusumakaLIo jevI pura kanyAo haLave sAde maMgalagIta gAI rahI hatI. nagarajanoe potAnAM gRhone toraNo, dhUpazikhAo ane nAnAM nAnAM citrothI alaMkRta karyA hatAM. gokhe ne jharUkhe, prAsAdonI agAsIo ane makAnanAM chAparAM para putravadhUo potAnA rAjamAIne vadhAvavA sarva sAmagrI sAthe besI gaI hatI. killAnI pAchaLa ugatA ravinAM kesaravaraNAM kiraNo, e navayauvanAonAM puSTa rakta kapola pradeza para lAvaNyanI navajyota pragaTAvatAM hatAM. 253 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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rAjasarovaromAM kamalapuSpo pUrNapaNe vikasyAM hatAM. vAgho durganI sAthe paDaghA pADatAM gAjavA lAgyAM. duMdubhinA nAda ane tUrighoSa AkAza gajavavA lAgyo. dhULanI DamarIo AkAzamAM caDhI. rAja kumAra zrIpAlanuM svAgata! mahArAjAnA jamAInuM svAgata! mayaNAsuMdarInA bhartAranuM svAgata! nagaravAsIonAM haiyAM lAgaNIthI adha ardhA thaI jatAM hatAM. emanAM dila maMgalakAmanAonI AratI utAratAM hatAM. tyAM to rAjakAthI para soneraselI ne maNimuktAothI jaDelI aMbADI najare paDI. aMbADImAM zrIpAla ane mayaNA beThelAM hatAM. UgatA sUryane paNa jhAMkho pADe tevI tejaAbhA zrIpAlanA mukha para jhaLahaLI rahI hatI. zrIpAlanI bAjumAM ja mayaNA beThI hatI. tenA hAthamAM rezamI jhUlavALo suvarNapaMkho hato. hajI enI UghaDatI juvAnI hatI, paraMtu eno prabhAva ujjayinInI prajA para jAmelo hato. enA pravitra ne suMdara mukhane kSaNavAra paNa nIrakhI levuM, e jIvananI aNamola paLa manAtI hatI. Aje mayaNA nagaravAsIone atyaMta pratibhAvaMta lAgI. temaNe jAyuM hatuM ke uMbararANAnA kuSTharoganuM nivAraNa ane enA 700 sAthI kuSTharogIonA roganuM nivAraNa mayaNAe karyuM hatuM. mayaNAnuM svamAnI, pratApI ane prabhAvazALI vyaktitva mAlavaprajAnuM prabaLa AkarSaNa banyuM hatuM. e divase ujjayinI nagarI ajaba utsAha, adamya ullAsa ane amApa harSanI taraMgAvaliomAM nAhI rahI hatI! AkhA nagaramAM sau mayaNAnI prabhAvagAthA gAI rahyAM hatAM. savArI sAmatarAjA puNyapAlanA rAjamahelanA vizALa dvAra pAse pahoMcI. rAjakuLanI strIo amArAM ovAraNAM laI svAgata karavA UbhI hatI. ame hAthI parathI nIce UtaryA. amAruM svAgata thayuM. ame bhavya rAjamahelamAM praveza karyo. mahela pUrvAbhimukha hato. khUNAmAM eka nAno bAga hato. mArI mAmI vizAlA mane khUba gamatI. e paNa mane khUba cAhatI hatI. mArI mAtA rUpasuMdarI sAthe paNa mArI mAmIne sAro prema hato. mAmA, mAmI, mAtA.. ane bIjA svajano mahelanA sabhAkhaMDamAM bhegAM mANo 2pa7 For Private And Personal Use Only

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thayAM hatAM. mAmAe zrIpAlano paricaya Apyo. sahu svajano, nagarazreSThIo ane rAjyanA adhikArIo vismita thayA. AnaMdita thayA. mayaNAe karelA roganivAraNanI vAta sAMbhaLI sahu mayaNA tarapha ahobhAva-bharI dRSTithI joI rahyA! mayaNAe kahyuM : "he pUjyo, roganivAraNa mArAthI nathI thayuM, e badho ja prabhAva gurudevazrI municandrasUrijIno che. emanA ja aciMtya anugrahathI badhuM sAruM thayuM che. tyArapachI mayaNAe rANI kamalaprabhAno paNa sahune paricaya Apyo. sahunAM mana rAjI thayAM. prItibhojana karI sahu pota-potAnA sthAne gayA. juo rAja kumAra, have A rAjamahela tamArI ja che, ema samajIne ahIM rahevAnuM che." rAjA payapAle zrIpAlane potAnA mahelamAM kAyama mATe rahevA AmaMtraNa ApyuM. mahela vizALa che. tamane ane mayaNAne mahelano je bhAga game, tyAM tame rahI zakazo. tamArI icchA mujaba tyAM badhI ja sagavaDatAo thaI jaze. joke lagabhaga to badhuM vyavasthita ja che. chatAM mayaNA joI leze, ne je kaMI navuM karavAnuM haze te thaI jaze.' pachI kamalaprabhA sAme joIne puNyapAla bolyA : mahArANIjI, Ape paNa have ahIM putranI sAthe ja rahevAnuM che. ahIM koI vAte saMkoca rAkhazo nahIM. rUpasuMdarI ahIM che, enI bhAbhI paNa tamane sAro sAtha Apaze!' tyAM vizAlA bolI : "Ape taddana sAcuM kahyuM. caMpAnI mahArANI mArA ghera kyAMthI? mane to AnaMdanI koI sImA nathI... mayaNA mArI bhANeja nathI, mArI putrI che! e mane khUba ja priya che... rAjasabhAmAM je divase ulkApAta thayo... mayaNA uMbararANAno hAtha grahIne cAlI gaI... tyArathI mane zAMtithI UMgha nathI AvI, bhojana nathI bhAvyAM...' bolatAM bolatAM vizAlAno kaMTha rUMdhAI gayo. rUpasuMdarIe sADInA pAlavathI vizAlAnI AMkho lUchI. kamalaprabhAe lAgaNIbharyA svare kahyuM : "amArI du:khanI amAsanI rAta vItI gaI.. sukhanuM prabhAta pragaTyuM che... kevI rUpavAna, guNavAna ane 258 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #268
prabhAvavaMtI putravadhu maLI! kevAM snehachalochala svajano maLyAM.. kharekhara, manuSyanuM jIvana eka sukha-duHkhanuM cakra che! sukha pachI duHkha, du:kha pachI sukha... ane pAchuM.." mA, have duHkhanI kalpanA nA karIza!' zrIpAla bolI UThyo. "beTA, sukhane tuM zuM mAne che? pUcha A mayaNAne! e kaheze sukha to jhAkaLanA biMdu jevuM che... jotajotAmAM e kamalapatra parathI sarI paDe!" haze mA, sukha jhAkaLanA biMdu jevuM! paraMtu eka biMdu kharI paDaze ke bIjuM biMdu bAjhI paDaze.. e kharI paDaze ke trIjuM biMdu AvI jaze! mA, have du:khanI kalpanA ja nA karIza!' sAcI vAta che. paramAtmA RSabhadevano aciMtya anugraha prApta thayA pachI, gurudevanI parama kRpA maLyA pachI ane zrI siddhacakrajIne hRdayakamalamAM sthApita karyA pachI koI duHkhanI tAkAta nathI ke je ApaNane halabalAvI zake!" mayaNAe dRDha svare kahyuM. mayaNA, beTI! te ghaNAnAM duHkha dUra karyA... haju eka vyaktinuM duHkha dUra karavAnuM bAkI che!" rAjA puNyapAle kahyuM. konuM bhAI?" rUpasuMdarIe pUchuyuM. 'tuM pUche che konuM duHkha?' mayaNAnA niSkAsana pachI ane tArA ahIM AvyA pachI mahArAjA rAjamahelamAMthI bahAra nIkaLyA che kharA? kyAre ya rAja sabhAmAM AvIne beThA che kharA? teo potAnA khaMDamAMthI bahAra ja nIkaLatA nathI. emanI pAse mAtra be ja vyakti jaI zake che, eka rANI saubhAgyasuMdarI ane bIjA mahAmaMtrI somadeva. mArI bahena! jANe ke emaNe saMnyAsa laI lIdho hoya, e rIte e jIve che. ApaNe mahAmaMtrInA mukhe mahArAjAnI hAlata sAMbhaLIe to kharekhara, mahArAjA pratye karuNA UbharAI jAya evI vAto che...' 'bhAI, tame kaho cho te sAcuM haze. paNa emAM aparAdha kono che? aparAdhI e pote ja che ne? pote karelA aparAdhanI sajA pote ja bhAMgavavI rahI..' rUpasuMdarIno mahArAja pratyeno roSa jarA ya ocho thayo na hato. sAcI vAta che tArI, bahena! paNa mANasane potAnI bhUla samajAya tyAre mo 2pa9 For Private And Personal Use Only

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to e kSamApAtra bane ne?' bhUla samajAya to ne? bhUla samajAI hota to dIkarI jIve che ke marI gaI che - enI tapAsa paNa na karAvata? kyAM tapAsa karAvI? kyAM kone khabara-aMtara pUchuyA? e emanA ahaMkAranA hAthI para beThA beThA jhUlyA kare che...' mahAmaMtrI kahetA hatA... "kyAreka kyAreka mahArAjA mayaNAne yAda karI raDe che... bhIMta sAthe mAthuM pachADe che.. kyAreka mahArANIne yAda karIne pastAvo kare che. e paNa mane choDIne jatI rahI.' ema bolIne AjaMda kare che... vaLI pAchA roSamAM AvI jAya che... kyAreka to lAge ke mahArAjanuM citta bhramita thaI gayuM che...' "mAmA, pitAjInuM paNa hita thAo! temane sAruM thAo! e mArA parama upakArI che. emano upakAra huM bhUlI nathI. emaNe mane Apelo apAra prema bhUlI nathI.. meM kyAre ya emanuM bUruM ichyuM nathI. A to vAta dharmanA siddhAMtanI hatI! eTale vAta pakaDAI gaI. bAkI, mAtA-pitAnA upakAro kyAre ya bhUlI na zakAya. je bhUle te kapUta kahevAya. avasara Ave huM pitAnA mananuM jarUra samAdhAna karIza... Apa ciMtA nA karazo..' 260 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #270
nahi 89 . maNA! Arja emano kevo apUrva veza hato! dIrgha supuSTa zarIra, saumya kAMti, ujjavala netra, caMdanacarcita mukhazobhA, gaLAmAM zubhra puSpahAra, vAMkaDiyA gADhA vALamAM meghAbhiSekanI chavi, AMkhomAM nIla samudra-svapnanI sthira taraMgamayatA. eka ja vAra joyuM. lajjAthI AMkho namI gaI. mana thatuM hatuM ke anaMta kALa sudhI A manohara rUpa nihALatI rahuM, paNa lajjA asahanazIla hoya che! zrIpAla khUba komaLatApUrvaka Asana choDIne mArI tarapha AvI rahyA hatA. kaMpita hRdaye huM sthira rahI. manamAM thayuM... "A parama kAmya puruSanAM caraNomAM mAruM sarvasva arpI dau!" sAkSAt kAmadeva! suMdara kAmya puruSa! mArI dRSTi mArA hRdaya upara sthira hatI. kSaNabhara huM coMkI UThI. mArA hRdaya para A caMdanacarcita mukhazobhA konI? e to dUra hatA. mArA hRdaya para kema jouM chuM? A lalitA keTalI duSTa che! mArA kaMThanA ratnAhAranA padakamAM ujvala motInuM nAnakaDuM darpaNa jaDI dIdhuM hatuM. e ja darpaNamAM jhalakI rahI hatI zrIpAlanI chavi! e maMda hAsya kare che, huM lajjAmAM vadhu DUbI jAuM chuM... darpaNamAMthI najara khaseDI lIdhI. hAthapaga para najara karI, paNa tyAM ye e ja dazA. tyAM dareka pAMkhaDI para jaDelA ratnakhaMDamAM zrIpAlanI chavi jhalakI rahI hatI. mArI ratnacUDImAM, vIMTImAM ane karNaphUlamAM, mAthA paranI ketakImAM, nAkanI ratnanathanImAM zrIpAlanuM maNimaya rUpa zobhI rahyuM hatuM. mArA aMgaaMgamAM zrIpAlanI chavi citrita hatI. 0 0 0 zrIpAla! nizigaMdhAnAM nAnAM nAnAM zveta ane sugaMdhita phUlomAM zobhatI mayaNA kALA sIsamanA palaMga para salajja beThI hatI. huM zayanagRhamAM dAkhala thayo mayA 261 For Private And Personal Use Only

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ke tarata ja te vastro saMkoratI UbhI thaI. zaramathI moM nIcuM karIne te UbhI hatI. huM avAk thaI gayo. huM aTArImAM jaIne Ubho rahyo. tyAMthI AkAzamAM pUrNacandra dekhAto hato. potAnI rUperI cAMdanI dharatI para khobale khobale varasAvI rahyo hato. AkhI ujjayinI nagarI kevI zAMta hatI! kSiprA nadI taraphathI zItaLa pavananI lahera mahela sudhI laherAI rahI hatI. meM kSiprA nadI tarapha dRSTi karI. dUra cAMdanImAM vaheto eno rUperI pravAha ghumarATI letAM kabUtaro jevo dekhAto hato. haLavekathI meM aTArIno daravAjo baMdha karyo ane palaMga pAse pahoMcyo. e manamAM ne manamAM hasatI hatI. enA gAlamAM mohaka khaMjana paDyAM. te kaMI bolI nahIM. hajI ye te lajAmaNInI velanI jema lajavAIne UbhI hatI. meM kahyuM : A rAjamahelamAM aneka pASANapratimAo kotarelI che. emAM tAre eka vadhAro karavo che? kyAM sudhI Ama UbhI rahIza? basa nIce.' te saMkocAIne nIce beThI. enI sADInA sonerI buTTA mazAlanA prakAzamAM jhagamagI UThyA. meM ene vismayathI pUchyuM : mayaNA! A sADI Aje te kema pasaMda karI? khAsa koI kAraNa?' 'tamane siddhacakrajImAM sonerI AcAryapadanuM dhyAna karavuM vadhu game che ne eTale!' te atyaMta haLave sAde bolI. eno avAja rUpAnI ghaMTaDI jevo madhura hato, paraMtu enA avAja karatAM ya mane eno uttara bahu gamyo! aruMdhatIne laI AkAzamAM pUrNimAno pUrNa vikasita caMdra dhIme dhIme UMce caDavA lAgyo. gavAkSanA adhakhUlA daravAjAnI taDamAMthI kSiprA nadInI zItaLa laharIo nirbhayapaNo zayanagRhamAM maMda maMda praveza karI rahI hatI ane zItaLatAno anubhava karAvatI hatI. mayaNAnA sahavAsamAM mArA divaso AnaMdathI pasAra thatA hatA. te eka Adarza patnI hatI. mAtra patnI tarIke ja nahIM, paNa bahena, mAtA, kanyA, bhAbhI.. tarIkenA badhA saMbaMdhomAM paNa mane e Adarza ja lAgatI hatI. divasanA moTA bhAgano mAro samaya zrI siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanAmAM pasAra thato. kyAreka huM kSiprA nadInA taTa para jaIne paNa siddhacakrajInA dhyAnamAM nimagna thato. bAkIno samaya rAjA puNyapAla, mahAmaMtrI somadeva, mArI mAtA, 262 mayaNAM For Private And Personal Use Only

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mArI sAsu... vagerenI sAthe vAtAmAM pasAra thato. nagaranA zreSThIo, zreSThIkumAro, rAjyanA adhikArIo vagere paNa maLavA AvatA. temanI sAthe paNa ghaNI vAto thatI. mayaNAnA sahacaryamAM rAtri khIlI UThatI! jANe have mArA mATe rAtri rahI ja na hatI! akhaMDa divasa ja hato! covIsa kalAka ujAsa! paryakarma udAratAthI mArA para sukhanAM puSpo varasAvI rahyuM hatuM. mArI AsapAsa mArA para prema varasAvanArA keTalAMya svajano-parijano ane nagarajano hatAM. emAM ya rAjA puNyapAlano panotA putra azvinI to sAganA jhADa jevo sIdho, UMcA daMDa jevo ruAbadAra dekhAto hato! e mane khUba gamato. e chokaro vyAyAmapremI, svaccha, nirmaLa ane naphikaro jIva hato! mAro jANe nAno bhAI! zarIre hRSTapuSTa hato. enA premALa svabhAvanA kAraNe saune e vahAlo thaI paDyo hato. kyAreka rAjA puNyapAla ke mahAmaMtrI somadeva mArI sAthe rAjakAraNanI carcA karatA. payapAla mane kahetA "zrIpAla, hajI tamane rAjanItinuM kazuM jJAna nathI. rAjanIti eTale kapaTanIti! tyAM bhAvukatA cAle nahIM. rAjakAraNIonAM mana jaMgalI ghUsanA dara jevAM hoya che. enuM dara kyAMthI zarU thAya che ne kyAM jAya che, enI koIne jANa hotI nathI, tema rAjakAraNIonAM mana kaLI zakAtA nathI." mane A vAto sAMbhaLIne, mArI mAtAe kahelI mArA kAkA ajitasenane paryaMtranI vAta yAda AvatI. mAruM mana vicAromAM aTavAI jatuM. niyatie mAnavane jIvana zA mATe ApyuM haze? jAte baLIne, khAkha thaIne jagatane ujALavA mATe ke potAnA tuccha sukhane khAtara bIjAone nirdayatAthI saLagAvI devA mATe? mANasane prema ane sabhAvathI jIvavuM kema nahIM gamatuM hoya? to pachI jIvano mULa svabhAva kayo? prema ke krUratA? prakRtie ja, karmoe ja mANasamAM krUratA pedA karI haze ne? "dehamAM AtmA che', ema ghaNI vAra mayaNA kahe che. to pachI krUratA, dveSa, asUyA, vera... A badhA AtmAnA bhAvo haze? mayaNA "auyika bhAvo"nI vAta karatI hatI. jo ema ja hoya to pachI mANasano zo doSa? ke pachI A badhA mananA bhAvo che? mana keTaluM moTuM rahasya A be akSaromAM chupAyeluM che? mayamAM 263 For Private And Personal Use Only

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eka divasa amasto ja huM kSiprAnA kinAre pharavA nIkaLyo hato. tyAM zveta vastradhArI nIcI dRSTie cAlatA hasamukhA munivara siddhezvara mane rastAmAM maLyA. tAjAM khIlelAM zveta kamaLa jevo emano cahero prasanna ane praphulla hato. emanA eka hAthamAM sIsamanA lAkaDAno daMDa hato ane bIjA hAthamAM bhikSApAtra hatuM. kadAca teo bhikSA mATe ke jaMgala javA mATe nIkaLyA hoya. muni siddhezvara, AcAryadeva municandrasUrinA prItipAtra putravat ziSya hatA. mane A muni sarvaguNasaMpanna lAgyA hatA. jIvanayAtrAmAM teo mane sauthI vadhu adhyayanazIla ane durArAdhya chatAM vinamra yAtrI lAgyA hatA. teo jaina muni hatA. temanI maryAdAo hatI chatAM mArA mATe teo premALa mitra hatA. kudaratanA rasika bhoktA hatA. keTalI jhINavaTathI emaNe AsapAsanI nAnImoTI vAtone jIvanamAM bauddhikatAthI svIkArI hatI emanA vicAro vizALa hatA. huM emane thoDo thoDo oLakhato thayo hato. mArI sAthe kalAko sudhI vAto karatA. gurudeva municandrasUrie emanA vikAsanI badhI ja tako ApI hatI. emanA virATa vyaktitvanA vaTavRkSa heThaLa e muni bhUchatranI jema UcharyA hatA. mane emanuM anokhuM svataMtra vyaktitva lAgatuM hatuM. A ujjayinImAM emanA jevuM koInuM vyaktitva meM joyuM nathI. kyAreka to e gurudeva karatAM ya zreSTha lAgatA! himAlayanA zveta zikhara jevA UMcA! gaMgAnA paTa jevA vizALa! meM mAro ratha Ubho rAkhyo. huM nIce Utaryo. munivaranAM caraNe vaMdanA karI kahyuM: "he munirAja, ApanAM darzanathI Ajano divasa sAro ja ze! Aja to akalpanIya durlabha atithino bheTo thaI gayo! emaNe sahajatAthI hasatAM kahyuM : "mArAM darzana zuM ATalAM lAbhadAyI che? to to roja tArA kSiprA taTe javAnA mArgamAM AvIne Ubho rahuM." e to tamArA mATe zakya nathI, e huM jANuM chuM. paNa tamArAM darzana lAbhadAyI che e cokkasa! cAlo, zuM tame kSiprAnA taTa para padhAro cho?' nahIM mahAnubhAva, samaya thaI gayo che. mAre javuM joIe. gurudeva mArI rAha jotA haze." "to cAlo, huM paNa tamArI sAthe AvuM.' mAro ratha rAjA puNyapAlano putra azvinI calAvato hato. meM ene ratha rAjamahele laI javA kahyuM. 294 bhayA For Private And Personal Use Only

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meM siddhezvara munine eka prazna pUchyuM : munirAja! anAsaktabhAve eka prazna pUchuM chuM. ApanA gurudeve Apane koI divya anubhava karAvyo che kharo?' 'zrIpAla! mane sAkSAt anubhava che divya tattvono! paNa meM e koIne jaNAvyo nathI. Aja sudhI mane koI yogya vyakti maLI nathI, paNa Aje huM tane jaNAvIza." koI mahattvapUrNa ane gupta vAta kahevAnI hoya ema dhImA avAje munivare mane kahyuM : "teoe mane zrI siddhacakrajInA adhiSThAyaka vimalezvara yakSanuM AhvAna karI, temane pratyakSa bolAvavAno maMtra Apyo che.' oho! guru ziSya mATe zuM nathI karatA! dhanya che tamane guru-ziSyane!' 'zrIpAla, tane paNa huM e AhvAna-vidyA avazya zIkhavIza." Apano parama upakAra thaze, gurudeva!' eTalAmAM pUrva dizAmAM prakAza patharAI gayo. aMdhakAranuM peTa cIrIne sUryadeva upara AvyA. sonerI kiraNoe sAmrAjya pAtharyuM. sUryakiraNane jouM tyAre mane enA nirAkAra svarUpa vize hamezAM kheda thato. e jo sAkAra hota to meM ene mArAmAM samAvI lIdhAM hota. ene sugaMdha hota to meM ene mana bharIne mANI hota! e kiraNone vAcA hota to meM enI sAthe kalAko sudhI gappAM mAryA hota! to paNa huM dharAta nahIM. | siddhezvara muni bolyA : "zrIpAla, meM tane thoDI vAra pahelAM kahyuM hatuM ne ke jIvana anaMta che. mane A nadIkinAre enI tIvra anubhUti thaI rahI sonerI kiraNothI camakatA zrIpAlanA mukha para joIne munivare pUchyuM: sonerI kiraNonI prabhAthI tArI tejasvI kALI AMkho anerA tejathI camakI rahI che!' Ama jo, sAme kinAre hariyALAM ghAsa para jhAkaLabiMdu kevAM camakI rahyAM che?' munirAje AMgaLIthI saMketa karyo. hA", javAba Apyo, "kAle rAtre ahIM zaMkara-pArvatI AvyAM haze! teo saMtAkukaDI ramyAM haze ane ramatAM ramatAM pArvatInA gaLAMmAMnI motInI mALA tUTI gaI haze! ramyA pachI bahu vAre pArvatInuM enA para dhyAna gayuM mANA 265 For Private And Personal Use Only

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haze! juo, A tamArI kAyamanI kheMcAkheMcInuM pariNAma!' evI zaMkara sAthe mIThI takarAra karI haze! ane laDavAmAM savAra paDI gaI haze! pAchA javAnI utAvaLamAM hAtha lAgyA eTalAM motI jematema bhegAM karI pahora thAya e pahelAM patinA hAthamAM hAtha parovI teo kailAsa parvata para javA nIkaLI gayAM haze! bAkI rahelAM A motI atyAre caLakI rahyAM che. savAranA pahoramAM A jhAkaLabiMdu zaMkara-pArvatInA rahasyane sonerI kiraNa samakSa hasatAM hasatAM khulluM karI rahyAM che!" huM mArI kalpanA para khuza thaI munirAja sAme jovA lAgyo. muni maMda maMda hasatA hatA. nadIethI huM mahelamAM Avyo. mahelamAM dAkhala thatAM ja mane eka agatyanA samAcAra maLyA. rAjA puNyapAle saMdhyA samaye mahelanA vizALa prAMgaNamAM eka samAroha Ayojita karyo hato. sAmatarAjA puNyapAlanA rAjamahele nagArAM vAgyAM. rAjamahelanA zikhara para rezamI rASTradhvaja garvathI pharakato hato. amAruM eTale ke mAruM ane mayaNAnuM svAgata karavAno koI kAryakrama ghaDAyo hato. sabhAgRhanA madhyabhAgamAM pUrvAbhimukha nava-dasa hAtha UMcuM bhavya rAjasiMhAsana masta hAthInI jema zobhatuM hatuM. e prAcIna hatuM. bhavya hatuM. saMpUrNa suvarNathI maDhAyeluM hatuM. siMhAsananI be bAju mahArANI, rAjaguru, senApati, purohita, amAtyonAM Asana hatAM. rAjasiMhAsananI sAmenAM Asano para AmaMtrita rAjAo ane nagaranA yoddhAo beThA hatA. maMDapa khIcokhIca bharAI gayo hato. mukhya siMhAsana para mane ane zrIpAlane besADavAmAM AvyAM. sAmatarAjA puNyapAle UbhA thaI mane suvarNajaDita mugaTa paherAvyo. eka rUperI mUkavALI talavAra ane jariyAna vastro ApyAM ane te pachI temaNe ja mAro pUrvaparicaya ApI lokone Azcaryacakita karI mUkyA : caMpAnareza mahArAjA zrIpAlano jaya ho!' no gaganabhedI svara AkAzamAM UMce caDhaDhyo. rANI vizAlAe mayaNAnA zaNagAra sajyA hatA. mayaNAne sugaMdhI puSpono zaNagAra sajAvyo hato. mastaka para kamaLanI ardhanidrita kaLIono mugaTa paherAvyo hato. pITha para laTakatA chUTA keza 263 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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kSiprA nadInA UMDA nIlavarNA pravAhanI bhrAnti karAvatA hatA. bhAla pa2 ardhacandranI ADa karI hatI. sau mayaNAnA utkaTa rUpane, chaTAdAra yauvanane nIrakhI rahyA. A kAryakrama AnaMda-utsavano ja hato. nartakInAM nRtya ane saMgItakAranAM gItothI harSa mANavAno hato. kAryakrama khuba sArI rIte cAlato rahyo... mahArAjA prajApAlanA mahelamAM mahAmaMtrI somadeve, mahArAjAne khUba samajAvI-paTAvIne Aje saMdhyA samaye nagaranI bahAranA kAmadeva-udyAnamAM vihAra karavA javAnuM samajAvyuM. rANI saubhAgyasuMdarIe paNa mahArAjAne samajAvavAmAM sAtha Apyo. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'ghaNA divasothI nAtha, Apa mahelanI bahAra nIkaLyA nathI... nagaracarcA jANI nathI. rAjapuruSone maLyA nathI... Aje to Apane koI paNa rIte bahAra laI javA che! thadaLa, azvadaLa ne hastIdaLa sAthe savArI kADhavAnI che...' mahArAjA mAnI gayA. mahAmaMtrI ane rAjA puNyapAlanI yojanA pAra pADavAnI AzA baMdhAI. rAjasavArIne pAchAM pharatAM rAjA puNyapAlanA mahela AgaLathI pasAra karavAnI yojanA ghaDAI hatI. ane e ja rIte mahArAjA prajApAlanI savArI nIkaLI. nagaramAM pharI nagarajanoe rAjA-rANIne vadhAvyAM... savArI kAmadevanA ughAne pahoMcI. rAjA-rANIe kAmadevanI mUrtinI pUjA karI ane savArI pAchI pharI. dhIre dhIre savArI puNyapAla rAjAnA mahelanI nikaTa pahoMcI. tyAM madhura vAghonA avAja rAjAnA kAne paDyA : gItanA zabdo kAne paDyA : nRtyanA jhaNakAra kAne paDyA... 'A badhuM zuM saMbhaLAya che, rANI?' 'ApaNe mahAmaMtrIne pUchIe...' rANI saubhAgyasuMdarIe mahAmaMtrIne izAro karI bolAvyA. mA 'mahArAjA, A to ApaNA sAmaMtarAjA puNyapAlano mahela che. tyAM mahotsava cAlI rahyo che!' tyAM to rathanI sAme ja rAjA puNyapAla AvIne UbhA. 'mahArAjA, mArA mahelane pAvana karo!' mahArAjAno hAtha pakaDI puNyapAle mahArAjAne rathamAMthI utAryA. vizAlAe saubhAgyasuMdarIne utArI. For Private And Personal Use Only 237

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baMnene maMDapamAM laI javAmAM AvyAM. mahArAjAe siMhAsana para beThelI mayaNAne to oLakhI, paNa zrIpAlane na oLakhyo. basa, teo stabdha thaIne UbhA rahI gayA... manamAM hAhAkAra thaI gayo.. "A mArI putrIe bIjA koI puruSa sAthe lagna karyA lAge che! chevaTe pApa pragaTya ja! AmAM doSa mAro ja hato. meM bhayaMkara krodhamAM avicArI kRtya karyuM hatuM. mArI apsarA jevI putrI meM koDhIne paraNAvI dIdhI hatI... e chokarI paNa kuLazaMkhaNI nIkaLI... mArA kuLane abhaDAvyuM.. potAnA patine pariharI e bIjA yuvAnane paraNI gaI..." rAjAnA mukha para viSAda chavAI gayo. teo ghora glAnithI bharAI gayA. paraMtu tarata ja rAjA puNyapAle vAtane saMbhALI lIdhI! "mahArAjA, Ape vicAryuM tevuM nathI! "mayaNA mahAsatI che! 'mayaNAe tapa-japa, jJAna-dhyAna Adi dvArA gurudevazrI municandrasUrinI mahAna kRpAthI e ja kuSThI patine nIrogI karyo ane te rUpavAna, zauryavAna ane guNavAna banyo che! rAjana, ApaNo e jamAI caMpAnagarInA mahArAjA siharathanA putra zrIpAlakumAra che! rAjamAtA kamalaprabhA paNa ahIM mArA ghera ja rahelAM che. mATe zoka dUra karo ne navadaMpatIne hRdayanA AzIrvAda Apo. pachI badhI vAto vistArathI thaze.' 238 maya For Private And Personal Use Only

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pho 39 ha gIta-nRtyano kAryakrama pUrNa thayo. puNyapAla, mArA mAmA, mArA pitAjIno hAtha pakaDI mahelanA maMtraNAkhaMDamAM laI gayA. tyAM temane ratnajaDita suvarNa siMhAsana para besADI temanuM ucita svAgata karavAmAM AvyuM. tyArapachI mArA mAmAe mArI ane zrIpAlanI badhI ja kathA saMkSepamAM saMbhaLAvI dIdhI. pitAjI sAMbhaLatA sAMbhaLatA aneka AzcaryanA AMcakA anubhavatA hatA. huM, zrIpAla, mArI mAtA, vizAlA... kamalaprabhA.. ame sahu tyAM upasthita hatAM, mahAmaMtrI paNa hAjara hatA. bolatA hatA mAtra mArA mAmA. mahArAjAnA mukha para bhAvonuM parivartana spaSTa dekhAtuM hatuM. mAmAe je kahevAnuM hatuM te kahI dIdhuM. thoDI vAra khaMDamAM mauna patharAyuMpachI dhIrethI pitAjI mArI sAme joIne bolyA : beTI mayaNA...' huM dUra beThI hatI, UThIne emanI pAse beThI. temaNe potAno jamaNo hAtha mArA mAthA para mUkyo ane bolyA : beTI, A ajJAnI pitAne kSamA karI deje. ahaMkAravaza thaIne meM tArI sAthe anyAya karyo hato. rAjasabhAmAM teM kahelI vAta sAcI ja hatI. paNa mArA abhimAne mane bhramita karyo. tArI sAcI vAtano svIkAra to na karyo, uparathI tane du:khI karavA eka anAtha ane kuSTharogI puruSa sAthe tane paraNAvI dIdhI... 'paraMtu jaina dharmanA prabhAve tuM duHkhI na thaI. huM tane duHkhI na karI zakyo... tuM sukhI thaI! caMpAnagarInA rAjAnI rANI thaI! ane A kAmadeva jevaM tane bhara maLyo! kharekhara, jene puNyano udaya hoya che tene koI duHkhI karI zakatuM nathI ane jene pApakarmano udaya hoya che tene koI sukhI karI zakatuM nathI... mANa 269 For Private And Personal Use Only

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joke meM tArI sAthe evo duSTa vyavahAra karyo che ke tuM mAruM moDhuM jovA ya rAjI na hoya, chatAM huM tArI vAraMvAra kSamA mAgIne vinaMtI karuM chuM ke tame sahu have rAjamahelamAM cAlo. nadIkinAre ApaNo ja zveta mahela che, te mahela huM tamane ApuM chuM. Ame ya mAre to badhuM tamane ja ApavAnuM che ne!' 'pitAjI, amane ahIM mAmAnA ghare phAvI gayuM che, amane ahIM rahevA do.' pitAjInI viSAdagrasta chavi mArA hRdayane karuNAthI Ardra karatI hatI. tyAM paNa phAvI jaze. mAmA-mAmI tyAM paNa Avaze. have huM tamane mArI pAse ja rAkhavA icchuM chuM. beTI, je banavAkALa hatuM te banI gayuM... paNa tane yAda karIne rAtonI rAto huM raDyo chuM... taraphaDyo chuM... kone kahuM? tArI mAtA paNa mArAthI risAIne ahIM bhAInA ghera AvI gaI... saubhAgyasuMdarI paNa surasuMdarInI ciMtAmAM ne ciMtAmAM raDyA kare che... surasuMdarInA gayA pachI enA koI ja samAcAra nathI... huM to mRDha banI gayo chuM...' have mArI mAtAthI na rahevAyuM, na sahevAyuM. te jarA roSamAM bolI: 'viduSI... vidyAvatI nArInI vAtano vicAra ja nahIM karavAno? enA mATe sneha, sahAnubhUti ke samavedanA na hovAM joIe? zuM e paththara che? niSprANa pratimA hoya che? tame mUDha banyA, amane paNa mUDha karI nAMkhyAM...' bolatAM bolatAM enuM gaLu bharAI AvyuM. AMkha bhInI thaI gaI. mahArAjAnI diSTa jamIna para jaDAI gaI hatI. mArI mAtA bolI: 'bhale mayaNA-zrIpAla AvatAM hoya to temane rAjamahelamAM laI jAo. huM rAjamahelamAM nathI AvavAnI.' 'mahArANI! acAnaka zrIpAla bolI UThyA. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'mahArANIjI! navajAta zizunuM mana eka suvarNa tAsaka samuM nirmaLa hoya che. ene dunyavI gUMconI kaMI khabara hotI nathI. paraMtu AsapAsanI paristhitie eka vAra enA aMga para amaMgala hAtha pheravyo ke enA hAthanI rekhAo e tAsaka para spaSTapaNe UThavAnI! 270 are, rekhA mAtra UThatI nathI, suvarNanI tejomaya pArzvabhUmi para e rekhA sUryaprakAzamAM camakI UThe che! guNonI sAthe ajJAta doSo For Private And Personal Use Only mamaNA

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paNa dekhAvA lAge che. navajAta zizunuM mana dhoIne sApha karIne sUkavI nAkhelA vastra jevuM hoya che. emAM nAmanAya saLa hotA nathI. paraMtu e ja mana prauDha thatAM karacalI paDelA vastra jevuM banI jAya che. emAMthI zraddhA-jJAnanuM pANI varALa banI UDI jAya che. emAM daTAI paDyA rahe che kevaLa mUMjhavaNanA zuSka tANAvANA! keTalA tANAvANA! keTalI karacalIo! eno koI aMta ja nahIM! TheSa, tiraskAra, AtmazlAghA, udvega, AtmapIDana, kAma, matsara, moha, nirAzA, viphaLatA, prema, mamatA, karuNA, vAtsalya...! keTalI agaNita karacalIo che AmAM! pratyeka vyaktinA jIvana-vastra sAthe vaNAI gayelI! mahAdevI! je kaMI banyuM che temAM mahArAjAne aparAdhI mAnavAnI jarUra nathI. AvuM badhuM bane A saMsAramAM! kyAreka sArA mATe paNa kharAba banatuM hoya che! eka kuSTharogInA svarUpe tamane caMpAno rAja kumAra ne jamAI tarIke maLI gayo ! jo tame A vAtathI AnaMdita ho to mahArAjAne kSamA ApI do! huM to emanuM tattvajJAna sAMbhaLatI ja rahI! AvI abhuta vAta temaNe kevI rIte karI? ATaluM jJAna temane kyAMthI maLyuM? zuM emanI jJAnapadanI ArAdhanAthI thayelA kSayopazamanuM A phaLa haze! huM visphArita netre emane joI rahI. mArI mAtAnA mananuM samAdhAna thatuM lAgyuM. amAro ratha rAjamahelanA mahAdvAramAM pravezyo. rathamAM huM, mayaNA ane mArI mAtA kamalaprabhA - traNeya beThAM hatAM. rathano sArathi hato azvinI, ratha mahelanA dvAre Ubho rahyo, azvinI rathamAMthI nIce Utaryo. mayaNA ane mArI mAtA paNa nIce UtarI gayAM. huM rathamAM ja besIne rAjamahela jovA lAgyo. saMpUrNa rAjamahela sapheda saMgemaramaranA ArasathI bAMdhelo hato. enI sImAne zyAma pASANathI jaDI dIdhI hatI. zyAma sImAnI vacce A zveta rAjamahela kevo dekhAto hato? jANe kALI mATInI goLImAM ThAMsoThAMsa bharelo mAkhaNano piMDo! mayANA 271 For Private And Personal Use Only

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huM rathamAMthI nIce Utaryo. mAtA ane mayaNAM sAthe mahelamAM pravezyo. mahelamAM aneka khaMDo hatA. vacamAM goLAkAra pANInuM taLAva hatuM. emAM asta thatA sUryadevanAM asaMkhya kiraNo svecchAe vihAra karatAM hatAM. raMgIna mAchalIo ane zeta tathA unnata grIvAvALA rAjahaMso killola karI rahyA hatA. zveta ane nIla kamaLo vAyunI laharIthI ahIMtahIM DolatAM hatAM. taLAvanA cAreya khUNe zveta pASANamAMthI kotarelI siMhanI AkRtio hatI. sAme rAjamahelamAM javA mATe caDavAnAM sauthI vadhAre pagathiyAM hatAM! tyAM to mahArAjA prajApAla svayaM sAme AvyA. temanI cAla gavalI ane mohaka hatI. teoe je veza paheryo hato, temAM teo viSNu jevA zobhatA hatA. teo prabhAvazALI lAgatA hatA. hAthamAMthI avAranavAra sarI jatA uttarIyane potAnA hAthathI jALavatA hatA. emanI mAMjarI AMkho vedhaka ane pANIdAra hatI. vizALa bhAlapradeza hato ane nAka sIdhuM ane aNIdAra hatuM. vIjaLInI jema tejagatithI teo rAjamahelanAM pagathiyAM caDavA lAgyA. upara pahoMcIne teo UbhA rahyA. mArI sAme joIne bolyA : "tamane A rAjamahela gamaze!" mahelanA pratyeka thAMbhalA para suMdara nakazIkAma kotaravAmAM AvyuM hatuM. pratyeka thAMbhalo akhaMDa paththarathI ghaDAyelo hato. mahelanI bhIMto para aneka suMdara citro AlekhavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. pratyeka khaMDanA daravAje dAsa-dAsIo vinamrabhAve UbhAM hatAM. aneka sthaLe yoddhAonAM suMdara zilpo vibhinna mudrAmAM kaMDArelAM hatAM. ThekaThekANe lAkaDAnA piMjarAmAM mayUra, koyala, kapota, bhAradvAja Adi pakSIone rAkhavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. 'zrIpAla! mahArAjAe kahyuM : "have tamAre ahIM ja rahevAnuM che. roja rAjasabhAmAM AvavAnuM rAjyanA maMtrIgaNa sAthe paricaya karavAno. rAjya aMge jANakArI meLavavAnI ane AnaMdathI jIvavAnuM" mayaNAnI sAthe huM ane mArI mAtA, mahelanA amArA AvAsamAM pahoMcI gayAM. amArA pahelAM lalitA pahoMcI gaI hatI ane badhuM ja vyavasthita goThavI dIdhuM hatuM. mArI mAtAno rANI rUpasuMdarI sAthe sAro saMbaMdha baMdhAyo hato. rANI saubhAgyasuMdarI paNa mArI mAtA pAse 272 mayaNA For Private And Personal Use Only

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avAranavAra AvatI-jatI hatI. mayaNAnAM mAmI vizAlA paNa mArI mAtA sAthe ghaniSTha rIte premasaMbaMdhathI baMdhAyAM hatAM. sarvatra AnaMda phelAyo hato. mahelamAM, nagaramAM ane rAjyamAM. sarvatra mayaNAnI prazaMsA thaI rahI hatI. jaina dharmano apUrva mahimA phelAI rahyo hato. Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir amArA divaso, mahinAo... sukhabhogamAM pasAra thatA hatA. hA, amArI dharmaArAdhanA kyAreya khaMDita thatI na hatI. zrI siddhacakrajInuM pUjana, dhyAna barAbara thatuM hatuM. zrI RSabhaprAsAdamAM pratidina ame sahu darzana-pUjana-gIta-nRtya Adi bhakti-arcanA karatAM hatAM. gurudeva municandrasUrijInAM darzana-vaMdana karI emanI amRtavANInuM zravaNa karatAM hatAM. avAranavAra dharmacarcA paNa karatAM hatAM. mArI mAtA ane rUpasuMdarI paNa dharmacarcAmAM bhAga letI hatI. mArA nityakrama mujaba rathamAM besI huM ane azvinI kSiprA nadInA kinAre jatAM hatAM. A amAro prAbhAtika kAryakrama hato. kyAreka siddhezvara munirAja mArgamAM maLI jatA to huM rathamAMthI UtarI jato ne emanI sAthe cAlato. eka divasa na dhArelI ghaTanA banI. joke ghaTanA Ama to sAva mAmUlI kahevAya. paNa kyAreka nAnakaDo kAMTo pagamAM bhAre vedanA karato hoya che! evI ja vAta banI. rAjamArga parathI amAro ratha pasAra thaI rahyo hato. rathane azvinI haMkArato hato. huM rathamAM beTho hato. tyAM eka gharanA bAraNe eka kanyA UbhI UbhI mane joI rahI hatI. teNe enI mAtAne pUchyuM : 'mA, A rathamAM Avo suMdara puruSa koNa jAya che?' beTI, e ApaNA mahArAjAnA jamAI che!' mA A vArtAlApa savAranA nIrava vAtAvaraNamAM mane saMbhaLAyo... 'ApaNA mahArAjAnA jamAI!' mArI oLakhANa jamAI tarIke ApavAmAM AvI... mane vAta na gamI. loko mane sasarAnA nAme oLakhe che... mArA mATe lAMchanarUpa che.' jeo potAnA guNothI oLakhAya che te uttama puruSo kahevAya. jeo pitAnA nAme oLakhAya che teo madhyama koTinA puruSo For Private And Personal Use Only 273

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kahevAya. jeo mosALa-pakSathI oLakhAya teo adhama koTinA puruSo kahevAya ane jeo sasarAnA nAme oLakhAya teo adhamAdhama puruSo kahevAya.' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir e divase huM azvinI sAthe bolyo nahIM. e paNa mane gaMbhIra mukhamudrAmAM joIne bolyo nahIM. kSiprAnAM zItala pANImAM paNa mane TADhaka na vaLI. meM azvinIne kahyuM : 'ApaNe pAchA rAjamahele jaIe.' mane rAjamahele utArIne azvinI ratha laIne cAlyo gayo. huM sIdho mArA AvAsamAM pahoMcyo. mAruM mana udAsa hatuM. mane pelI strInA zabdo bhAlAnI jema bhoMkAtA hatA. mana caMcaLa banI gayuM hatuM. huM palaMgamAM paDI ALoTavA lAgyo. tyAM mayaNAno madhura svara saMbhaLAyo. kema Aje thAkI gayA?' te mArI pAse AvIne UbhI rahI. paNa meM enI sAme na joyuM. eNe mArI sAme dhArIne joI lIdhuM. 'udAsa lAgo cho... zuM thayuM?' huM mauna rahyo. te palaMganI kinAre basI gaI. 'tabiyata to sArI che ne?' meM mAthuM halAvIne hA pADI. 'to zuM manaduHkha thayuM?' ciMtAbharyA svare te bolI. 'zuM koIe tamAruM apamAna karyuM ke tamArI AjJA na mAnI? jaladI bolo... tamArI udAsInatA mArAthI joI jatI nathI...' meM ene mArgamAM sAMbhaLelo vArtAlApa kahI saMbhaLAvyo, ane pUchyuM : 'bhadre! mAre ahIM zvasuragRhe rahevuM keTaluM ucita che? sasarAnA nAme oLakhAvuM keTaluM kharAba che?' mayaNA mArI vAta sAMbhaLIne vicAramAM paDI gaIM... 274 'to pachI caMpAnuM rAjya levuM paDe... yuddha karavuM paDe... ane jo ema ja karavuM hoya to mArA pitA potAnI vizALa senA Apane Apaze. Apa yuddha karIne potAnuM rAjya pAchuM meLavo.' 'to duniyA kaheze sasarAnI sahAyathI rAjya lIdhuM! nA, nA, mAre tArA pitAnI koI ja sahAya nathI levI. huM mArA ja parAkramathI rAjya laIza...' For Private And Personal Use Only mamaNA

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"Apa vicAra. gaMbhIratAthI vicArIne je pagaluM bharavuM paDe te bharo.. Apa svaparAkramathI yazasvI bano, e to huM paNa icchuM chuM." eka strInI nAnakaDI jIbhe mArA sudaDha vyaktitvanuM kSullaka zabdothI mUlya AMkyuM? eka rAja kumAra mATe AthI bhayAnaka zarama-bIjI kaI hoI zake? joke e strI kaMI mAruM apamAna karavAnA AzayathI e zabdo bolI na hatI, chatAM e mArA mATe to ghora apamAna ja kahevAya. AvA zabdo aMtaHkaraNane vIMdhI nAkhatA hoya che. e zabdo huM bhUlavA prayatna karuM to paNa na bhUlI zakuM. zAMtinI paLomAM e mane vizeSa asvastha karI mUke che. hRdayasarovara DahoLAI jAya che. koI nirNaya karatAM pahelAM mAre munIzvara siddhezvarane maLIne emanuM mArgadarzana paNa levuM joIe. mayaNA paNa A aMge gaMbhIratAthI vicAratI to thaI gaI che. e samaje che "patinA gauravamAM patnInuM gaurava samAyeluM hoya che." ane buddhizALI tejasvI rAja kumArI, hamezAM potAnA patinA sauMdaryanI sAthe sAthe zaurya ane vIryanI pUjaka hoya che. e icche ke eno pati zUravIra hoya, parAkramI hoya.. digaMtavyApI kIrtivALo hoya! vaLI, jIvana, eka rAjakumAranuM jIvana mAtra ezaArAma mATe na ja hoya. jIvanano koI cokkasa Adarza hoya. koI nizcita dhyeya hoya. e dhyeyane pAra pADavA puruSArtha karavo joIe! Aje huM ekalo ja nadIkinAre javA nIkaLyo. Aje mAre siddhezvara mahAmunine maLavuM hatuM ane teo nadInA kinAre ja dhyAnastha dazAmAM jovA maLyA. huM AnaMdita thayo. jevuM dhyAna pUrNa thayuM ke meM jaIne vaMdanA karI. temanA mukha para smita ramI rahyuM. emanI AMkhamAMthI tejanA phuvArA chUTatA hatA. mukha brahmatejathI caLakatuM hatuM. meM temane sIdho ja prazna pUchyo : 'gurudeva, jIvana eTale zuM? jIvananuM dhyeya zuM?" 'zrIpAla, janma ane mRtyu vacce vahetI eka saritA... tene jIvana kahevAya. sRSTimAM jIvana to anaMta prakAranAM che. paraMtu kumAra, manuSyanuM jIvana sarvazreSTha jIvana kahevAya che." mayaNA 275 For Private And Personal Use Only

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zAthI munIzvara? A jIvanamAM kaI vAtanI zreSThatA che? sukhanI ke duHkhanI? yazanI ke apayazanI?' emAMthI eke ya nahIM! A mAnavajIvanamAM ja mukti pAmavAno puruSArtha thaI zake che. jIva ziva banI zake che. AtmA paramAtmA banI zake che. A daSTie A jIvananI zreSThatA che." munIzvara, meM muktinI, mokSanI vAto mayaNAnA mukhe sAMbhaLI che. mane thoDI thoDI samajAI che. paraMtu mahArAja, mAre to A vartamAna jIvanamAM mukti joIe che! zvasuragRhamAMthI mukti joIe che. have mana ahIM rahevAmAM akaLAya che...' zrIpAla, badhI ja vyathA, vedanAo ane akaLAmaNono aMtima upAya to AdhyAtmika ja che. chevaTe to enA ja zaraNe javuM paDaze paNa atyAre have A mArI vAto bhUlI jA! ane jIvanano artha kartavya-pAlana kara! tuM rAjakumAra che.... caMpAno bhUtapUrva rAjA che! tArI raktavAhinIomAM kSatriyanuM lohI vahe che! vaLI atyAre tArI puruSArtha karI levAno kALa che! puNyano prabaLa udaya tArA puruSArthane saphaLatAnA zikhare pahoMcADaze! vaLI, zrI siddhacakra jevuM advitIya siddhayaMtra tane maLeluM che. tArI avicala zraddhA che. tuM vidgo para vijaya meLavI zakIza." to mAre ujjayinI choDIne..." "hA, gurudeva kahetA hatA ke paradezamAM ja zrIpAlanI bhavya unnatinA prabaLa yoga che!" tyAre meM gurudevane pUcheluM : "gurudeva, zrIpAla kyAMthI prayANa kare to zubha thAya?" gurudeve kaheluM : "bhRgukaccha baMdarathI enuM prayANa thaze! ene daivI zaktio prApta thaze..." siddhezvara munivare mArA khabhA para potAno hAtha mUkIne mane kahyuM: 'hRdayamAM zraddhA, sAhasa ane zaurya bharIne jIvananA mArge prayANa karaje.' pachI ame sAthe ja nagaramAM AvyA. rAjamahela AgaLa huM Ubho rahyo to temaNe kahyuM : "kumAra, gurudevanAM darzana karIne Ava ne ! cAla, mArI sAthe.." huM munirAja sAthe pauSadhazALAmAM gayo. gurudevanAM darzana karyA. 276 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

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khIlelA pArijAta vRkSa jevA teo zAMta ane prasanna dekhAtA hatA. emano avAja madhura hato. gaMbhIra hato. emane jotAM ja mAruM hRdaya anekavidha bhAvothI... nadInAM pUra jevuM UbharAI gayuM. huM emane mArA bhagavAna mAnato hato. emAM atizayokti nathI. teo mArA ane mayaNAnA aMtaryAmI che. nahitara teo mArA mATe siddhezvara muninI AgaLa mArI unnatinI vAta zI rIte kare? huM kaMI paNa boluM e pUrve to gurudeve kahyuM : vatsa, tAro saMkalpa sAco che, tAruM bhaviSya mane pratyakSa ujvala dekhAya che. mAtAnA AzIrvAda grahaNa karIne, mayaNAnI zubhakAmanAo laIne zubha divase prayANa karI devuM joIe.' mAruM mana daitamAMthI advaitamAM sarI paDyuM. vicAronuM tumula yuddha zAMta thaI gayuM. meM gurudevanI preraNA aMtaHkaraNamAM jhIlI lIdhI. tyAM siddhezvara munivara mArI pAse AvIne UbhA rahyA. teo bhAvavibhora hatA. mArA pratye apAra sneha vaheto meM anubhavyo. emanA vizuddha snehano jANe mane sparza thato hato. teo bolyA : kumAra, dharmane hRdayamAM dhAraNa karIne zUravIra puruSa arthapuruSArtha ane kAmapuruSArthane sAdhe che. vipula artha-kAmanI prApti thayA pachI, eno paribhoga karyA pachI e niSkAma.. nispRha bane che. pachI enA jIvanamAM mokSa-puruSArtha AraMbhAya che, ke je A manuSyajIvananuM aMtima lakSya che." zrI siddhacakra sarvatra ane sarvakALa tArI rakSA karaze ane tArA A bhagavAna..." siddhezvaranI AMkhomAMthI AMsunI dhArA vahI rahI... "tArA A bhagavAna sadaiva tane AzIrvAda ApatA raheze!' 277 For Private And Personal Use Only

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( 3 ) pelI dAsI pUchI rahI che, "rAjamAtA, Apa udAsa kema cho? kaI rIte ene samajAvuM ke huM udAsa kema chuM? mArA jIvanamAM AMdhInuM kevuM tophAna macI gayuM che? enuM zuM kAraNa haze? manuSyane A cakarAvAmAM koNa ghumAvatuM haze? Ano sUtradhAra koNa haze? mayaNA vAraMvAra kahe che : jIva mAtrane karmo nacAve che. karmo ja dareka jIvanA sUtradhAra che. paNa AvAM mArAM karmo? Aje huM A rAjamahelanI aTArIe UbhI chuM. mArI AsapAsa vaibhava che. mArA dareka Adezane jhIlavA tatpara dAsa-dAsIo khaDe page UbhAM che. ujjayinInAM sau nagarajano mane "rAjamAtA. rAjamAtA..." kahI Adara Ape che. rAjA prajApAla jevA sAlasa ne baLavAna rAjA paNa mane Adara Ape che. zrIpAla jevo suMdara, suzIla, saMyamI, vIra putra hovA chatAM mArA duHkhanuM kAraNa zuM haze? koI paNa strIne AthI vadhu zuM joIe? ThIka che, nAnI uMmaramAM mane vaidhavya AvyuM. rAjya gayuM... du:kha AvyAM.. paNa dukha gayAM ne sukha AvyAM che ne! AnAthI vizeSa zuM joIe? paraMtu vAta ema nathI. kevaLa AvI bAhya vAto para sukha avalaMbatuM nathI. mananI svasthatA hoya to ja jIvane zAti vaLe. tyAre ja jIvana sukhI gaNAya. ATalA vaibhavonI vacce hovA chatAM mane aMtaramAM zAMti nathI. jyArathI zrIpAle paradeza javAnI vAta karI che tyArathI mArI chellI keTalIya rAto ajaMpAmAM vItI che. mAruM mana pavananI AMdhImAM UDatAM sUkAM pAnanI jema kyAMya dUra sudhI pahoMcI jAya che. chellAM pacAsa varSonI yAtrA karIne mana pharI pAchuM dehanA piMjarAmAM purAI jAya che. emAM ya gata pacIsa varSono kALa! pacIsa varSonA lAMbA kALamAM A kamalaprabhAe kamalaprabhArUpe keTalA divaso vitAvyA haze? eka paNa divasa nahIM! A varSo keTalAM 278 mANA For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #288
kRpaNa ane keTalAM zithila? mArA mananA saghana AkAzamAMthI atItanI smRtionI varSA aneka dhArAe varasavA lAge che. kyAreka evI muzaLadhAra varSA thAya che ke enA mArAthI mAruM mana cALaNI to nahIM thaI jAya, evI bhIti jagAve che. zrIpAla videzayAtrAe javAnuM kahe che. sArI vAta che enI. vIra, svamAnI ane parAkramI rAjakumAra bIjAnA Azare AnaMda-pramodanuM jIvana pasAra karavAnuM pasaMda na ja kare. Ama to mahArAjA prajApAle paNa ene kahyuM ke tAre caMpAnuM rAjya levuM hoya to mArI vizALa senA tane ApuM. tuM ajitasena sAthe yuddha karI, enA para vijaya meLavI, tAruM rAjya prApta kara. paraMtu zrIpAle nA pADI. sasarAnI sahAyathI rAjya nathI meLavavuM ke sasarAnA Azraye rahevuM paNa nathI. ene videzamAM jaIne bhAgyane camakAvavuM che ane eno bhAgyodaya thaze ja, ema mAruM mana kahe che... chatAM eka mAtA chuM ne huM? varSo sudhI putrano viraha meM vekyo che. putranA rogagrasta dehane varSo sudhI joIne raDI chuM... taraphaDI chuM. meM enA bAlyakALanA lADakoDa pUrA karyA nathI. enA zaizavakALane AnaMdathI bharyo nathI. huM ene koI sukha ApI zakI nathI. have jyAre sukhanA divaso AvyA che tyAre e mane choDI javAnI vAta kare che. pahelAM meM eno tyAga karyo hato, have e mAro tyAga karavA taiyAra thayo che... paNa have huM eno viraha sahana karI zakIza? mAruM mana kevuM AvyuM banI gayuM che. vAraMvAra mane enuM mukha jovAnI Teva paDI gaI che. zuM karuM? eka tarapha kartavyanI bhAvanA ene rokavAnI nA pADe che. bIjI tarapha enA taraphano patrasneha ene javA devAnI nA pADe che... oho... manamAM kevuM vaita pedA thaI gayuM che? vicAronuM vaita! koI koI vAra zrIpAla jaMgalamAMthI pAchA AvavAmAM eTalI vAra lagADatA ke huM ciMtAmAM paDI jatI. sakhI lalitA mArA mananI vAtanuM anumAna karI letI ane AzvAsana ApatI kahetI, "sakhI, tuM mArA mANA 279 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #289
priya sakhAnuM apamAna kare che!" huM tenI sAme joI rahetI. te hasIne kahetI, "zrIpAla jaMgalamAM ekalA zuM zuM karI zake che, jaMgalI hiMsaka prANIone zaktihIna karI de che, e ja tuM jANatI hota to tuM ATalI ciMtA na karata. lAge che ke zrIpAlanA bAhubaLa ane astra kauzala para tane bharoso nathI, A zuM zrIpAlanuM apamAna nathI? tuM emanI gharmapatnI cho, to paNa emanA mATe AvI kalpanA kare che? tuM emanI ciMtA na kara." lalitAnuM AzvAsana sAMbhaLIne huM mArI jAtane dilAso ApavAno prayatna karatI hatI. e divase zrIpAla pAchA AvyA tyAre lohItaraboLa ane jakhamI hatA. A kema thayuM, e koI jANatuM na hatuM. e divase teo kaMIka becena hatA. e hAlatamAM ja pAMcAladezanA eka vegavAna ghoDA para besIne teo jaMgalamAM gayA hatA. ghoDAe vega pakaDyo ne e jaMgalamAM antardhAna thaI gayA. bahu vAra pachI e ghoDo ekalo ja jhaDapathI doDato pAcho Avyo. sevako zrIpAlane zodhI zodhIne thAkI gayA. Akhare pahADanI taLeTImAM bebhAna paDelA joyA. jakhamI dazAmAM UMcakIne temane laI AvyA. romAMcaka ghaTanAonA nAyaka banavAnI lAlasA zrIpAlamAM janmathI haze? kadAca ALasa ne udAsI dUra karavA mATe e bhayAnaka ghoDAnI pITha para e vana-parvata-pradezanuM sauMdarya jotAM jotAM asvastha thaI gayA haze. e vakhate ghoDo emanA kAbU bahAra gayo haze ane e paDyA haze. kevI rIte zuM thayuM, eno vicAra karavAno samaya na hato. tarata ja sAravAra zarU karI. rAjavaidya cikitsA karI. temaNe kahyuM : "satata lohI vahI rahyuM hatuM paNa ciMtA jevuM nathI. hamaNAM bhAnamAM AvI jaze." e vakhate lalitAe hasIne kahyuM : "have samajI, ujjayinInI azvazALAmAM bIjA ATalA azvo hovA chatAM pAMcAlano duSTa azva laI jaIne zrIpAle zA mATe Apatti vahorI lIdhI! nahIM to tanvI priyatamA mayaNAnuM sAhacarya kema maLe? sadAcArI, suzIla ane bolavAmAM saMyamavALA zrIpAla, mayaNA pAse jabaradastI sevA... sAhacarya meLave nahIM ne!' 28O mayaNa For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #290
lalitAnI dareka vAtamAM rasikatA hovA chatAM mArA du:kha ane saMtApanI sImA na hatI. vicAra karatI hatI ke zrIpAle AvuM kAma kharekhara zA mATe karyuM? huM zrIpAlanA paga pAse beThI hatI. mAthA pAse mA kamalaprabhA beThAM hatAM. zrIpAla bhAnamAM AvI rahyA hatA. AMkha khUlatAM ja mArA para emanI najara paDI. mArI AMkho bharAI AvI. mA beThAM hatAM eTale meM mArI jAtane ekadama saMbhALI lIdhI. zrIpAle eka vAra AMkho kholIne pAchI mIMcI dIdhI, bIjI ja kSaNe mA sAme joIne hasyA ane bolyA : nAnI amastI vAtamAM tame sau gabharAI jAo cho? lohI vahI jAya e mArA mATe koI navI vAta nathI.' kamalaprabhAe koI javAba na Apyo. mAtra emanA vALa para hAtha pheravatAM rahyAM. emanI AMkhamAM AMsu AvyAM. zrIpAla mATe haLavuM bhojana karavA e UThyAM. mane kahetAM gayAM ke zrIpAlanA paganAM taLiyAM dhIre dhIre paMpALatI raheje.' huM paNa e ja icchatI hatI. dhIrethI, hRdayanI badhI ArdratA sAthe nIlakamalanI jema emanA pagane paMpALavA mAMDI. tyAM lalitA bolI 'rAjakumAra, mArA ahIM rahevAthI tamArA ArAmamAM muzkelI to nathI paDatI ne?' zrIpAlanA mukha para hAsya pharI vaLyuM. tyAM lalitAe potAnI vAcALatA AgaLa calAvI 'mayaNAnI sevA ane sAhacaryanA lobhathI to ghoDAnI pITha parathI paDIne A hAlata nathI karI ne?' huM lajjA ane du:khathI bevaDa vaLI gaI. zrIpAla gaMbhIra thaI gayA. teo bolyA : 'lalitA, koI paNa yuddhanA kAraNe pRthvI 52 lohI vahetAM AvyAM che. dAnavatva naSTa karavA mATe thoDuM lohI vahevaDAvavuM paDe che!' - maNA - Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir 'zuM kaho cho? dAnava koNa? yuddha zAnuM?' lalitA coMkI UThI. zrIpAla sthira najare lalitA sAme joI rahyA. 'mANasanI kAmanA ne vAsanA ja duSTa dAnava che ane viveka vacce saMgharSa thAya che! kAmanArUpa dAnava baLavAna thaI jAya che, tyAre mAthA para lohI caDhI jAya che! vAsanA gaLI jAya che vivekane. basa, mAthA parathI lohI vahI jAya eTale dAnava hArI jAya che!' konI vAta karo cho?' lalitAne kaMI samajAyuM nahIM. For Private And Personal Use Only 281

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mArI vAta. mANasanI vAta. mANasanI vAsanAnI vAta...! mana thatuM hatuM ke zrIpAlanI chAtI para mAthuM mUkIne khUba AMsu vahAvI dauM. pUrA vizvAsathI kahuM - "svAmI! tamArA vinA ujjayinamAM A deha dhAraNa karIne kevI rIte jIvI zakIza?' - huM cUpacApa emane jotI jotI zaMnuM zuM vicAratI rahI... e zA mATe videza-paradeza javAnI haTha laIne beThA che? mArA mATe AthI moTI bIjI kaI sajA hoI zake? | vidAyanA hAvabhAvathI emaNe kahyuM : "have rajA Apo, mayaNA! jIvatA rahIzuM to pAchAM maLIzuM. vana-jaMgalamAM eka vAra paga mUkyA pachI kyAM zI Apatti Ave, koNa jANe?' AzaMkA, udvega ane ciMtAthI mAruM moDhuM sukAI gayuM. manamAM thatuM hatuM ke zrIpAlanAM caraNomAM namI paDIne kahyuM - "mane Thokara mArIne paradeza jAo... udvega ane AzaMkAmAM thoDuM thoDuM maravA karatAM ApanAM caraNomAM mRtyu kalyANakArI thaze.' paNa mane lAgyuM ke mAro jhAMkho cahero joIne teo manamAM duHkhI thaze. meM mArA manane kaThora banAvIne kahyuM : caMpAnA ane ujjayinInA zreSTha vIra zrIpAla araNyamAM aNadhArI ApattinI vAta kare che? pahelI vAra sAMbhaLuM chuM. mane to vizvAsa che ke vIra-zreSTha zrIpAla koI paNa ApattimAMthI mukta thavA samartha che. pRthvInI koI zakti emane parAjita nahIM karI zake. zrI siddhacakrajI Apane kSemakuzaLa pAchA lAvaze. basa, zrI siddhacakrajI ApanI pAse che, eTaluM ja yAda rAkhajo." zrIpAla komaLa avAje bolyA : "mayaNA! tame tamAruM kartavya pUruM karyuM che. tame mAtAnI sAthe rahejo. tamane mAro abhAva nahIM khaTake. gurudevanuM sAMnidhya che, paramAtmA RSabhadevanI chatrachAyA che... divaso sukhacenamAM pasAra thaI jaze. huM paradezamAM kyAMya paNa rahuM, zrI siddhacakrajI tamArI pAse raheze. tamane cena maLaze, mane paNa cena maLaze.' huM cUpa. bIjuM zuM kahuM? huM mUMgI thaI gaI. ghaNuM badhuM kahyA vagara rahI gayuM. zrIpAle mAro hAtha potAnA hAthamAM laIne kahyuM : "tame 282 mayaNAya For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #292
viduSI cho, vidyAvatI cho, tamane huM zo upadeza ApuM? to paNa thoDI vAta kahuM chuM. kyAreka mA kaThora thaI jAya to gerasamaja na karazo. emanA manane AghAta na Apazo. evI ja rIte mahArAjAnI upekSA na karazo. tamArI mAtA sarvoparI che. emanA taraphanAM kartavyomAM DhIlAza nahIM karatA. mArA mATe tame du:khadarda sahyAM che, mAna-apamAna sahyAM che. e kyAre ya bhUlI zakIza nahIM. rahI mArI vAta! mArA duHkhano have eka vicAra paNa na karazo. eka rAjaputre bacapaNathI ja vanavAsa, Apatti, upavAsa, thoDuM anna, garIbI ane bhAgyanI sAthe saMgrAma karyo che! karmono yoga haze.. to ApaNe pharI maLaze. have vidAya Apo." zrIpAlano eka eka akSara svIkAravA jevo hato. huM sAMbhaLatI jatI hatI. dharAtI na hatI. meM kahyuM : mArA nAtha! vahelA vahelA pAchA Avajo. mane bhUlI na ja zo! tame parAkramI ne puNyazALI cho, aneka rAjakumArIo tamArI ardhAganA banavA talasaze. chatAM A dAsIne vIsarI na jazo." che. AjathI roja ekAsaNAnuM vrata karIza. che. jamIna para zayana karIza. ja snAna ane zaNagArano tyAga karIza. che sacitta - sajIva vastuonuM bhakSaNa nahIM karuM. zrI siddhacakra-mahAyaMtranI pratidina ArAdhanA karIza. tamArI mAtA ane mArI mAtA paNa siddhacakrajInuM ArAdhana karaze. ame roja tamArA kuzaLanI kAmanA karatAM rahIzuM. Apano mArga kuzaLa ho! nirvighna ho....! tyAM kamalaprabhA AvyAM. teo bhAvAvezamAM hatAM. "vatsa, huM tArI sAthe paradezamAM Avaze. tyAM huM tArI khabara-aMtara rAkhIza... tane vatsa, eka ghaDI paNa have mArAthI judo nahIM rahevA dauM..." kamalaprabhA raDI paDyAM. zrIpAla gaMbhIra svare bolyA : "mA, paradezamAM tuM ke mayaNA sAthe ho to mArA mATe moTuM baMdhana rahe. mane tamArI ciMtA rahe... huM mArAM apaNA 283 For Private And Personal Use Only

Page #293
dhAryA kAryo na karI zake. mATe tame sAsu-vahu ahIM ja sAthe rahejo . zrI siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanA karajo." rotI rotI kamalaprabhA bolI : "putrI zrI siddhacakrajInA adhiSThAyaka devo ane devIo tArI rakSA karo! tArAM vighno dUra karo..." kamalaprabhAe zrIpAlanA bhavya lalATe kesaranuM tilaka karyuM. gaLAmAM puSpahAra paherAvyo ne kamare talavAra bAMdhI. vijayamuhUrte teo prayANa karI gayA... samaya vitato jAya che. joke e kyAre ya pUro nathI thato. zarIrane duHkha sahavAnI Adata paDI jAya che, pachI e game teTaluM asahya hoya to paNa! sUraja Uge che ne Athame che. divasa para divasa vItatA jAya che... vicAratI rahetI. zrIpAla kyAre pAchA Avaze? mAtA kamalaprabhA sAthe huM rAjamahelanA ja udyAnamAM eka kuTIramAM rahetI hatI. ame baMne brahmacAriNI hatAM. mA amArA baMne mATe bhojana banAvatI. ame eka vAra ja bhojana karatAM. e paNa sAva sAmAnya. divasano moTo bhAga pUjA-arcanAmAM ane siddhacakrajInI ArAdhanAmAM pasAra thato. roja paramAtmAne ame sAsu-vahu prArthanA karatI ke "zrIpAla jyAM hoya tyAM sukhI rahe! temanAM duHkho dUra thAo!" devarSi nArada pAsethI koI koI vAra zrIpAlanA khabara maLI jatA. devarSi nArada ghaNA divasa pachI AvyA hatA. zrIpAlanA samAcAra laIne AvyA hatA. mAro saMnyAsinI jevo veza joIne teo hasyA. bolyA : have A udyAna-kuTIra choDIne mahelamAM pAchAM jAo. rAjanaMdinI! A badhAMnI have zI jarUra che?" meM AzaMkAthI pUchayuM : "devarSi, zrIpAla kuzaLa to che ne?' 'zrIpAlanA kuzaLatA sivAya bIjA zA khabara hoI zake? kuTIranA AMgaNAmAM besIne nArade kahyuM : "zrIpAla vIrapuruSa che. e jyAM paga mUke che tyAM zreSThatA prApta kare che! dareka dezamAM emane vividha prakAranA durlabha upahAra maLe che, sanmAna maLe che." nArada hasIne bolyA - "mayaNA! mANasanI kAmanA avinAzI che. 284 For Private And Personal Use Only

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saMsAranI dareka utkRSTa vastuthI ghara sajAvyA pachI paNa mana khAlI rahe che. jeTaluM pAme che, eTaluM ja vadhu pAmavAnI icchA vadhI jAya che. eTale zrIpAla jeTaluM vadhAre meLavaze eTalI ja tamArI AkAMkSA, moha, mAyA ane sAthe sAthe duHkha tathA abhAva vadhI jaze. eTale zrIpAlane zuM zuM maLyuM te na pUcho. kadAca ethI tamane duHkha thaze!' 'duHkha thaze?" huM AzaMkAthI bAvarI banI gaI. devarSie komaLa avAje kahyuM : "mayaNA, Apa koI sAdhAraNa rAjakanyA nathI. viziSTa cho. tame rAjAonA ane zreSThIonA aMtepuromAM aneka upapatnIo joI che ane A rAjAonuM gaurava gaNAya che. eTale zrIpAla videzayAtrAmAM jo potAnA pauruSanA baLe suMdara rAjakumArIo meLave to ene tamAruM gaurava mAnavuM joIe. zrIpAla bhale so patnIo svIkAre, paNa Apa emanI prathama patnI - priyatamAM rahevAnAM ja. bIjI patnIonI vacce tamArI zreSThatA sthApita karavAno moko maLaze. tethI Apa zrIpAlane vadhu priya banI zakazo.' huM cUpa hatI. nirvikAra hatI. zrIpAlanI huM prathama patnI chuM ja, paNa emanI sAthe dAmpatyajIvanamAM sukha, AnaMda, rAga-dveSa, virAgaanurAganI anubhUtimAM bhAgIdAra thanAra emanA jIvananI prathama nArI huM nahIM? to koNa haze e bhAgyavAna rAjakanyA jene kAraNe zrIpAla potAnuM brahmacarya, japa, tapa, vagere badhuM bhUlI gayA? nArada hasIne bolyA : "zrIpAlamAM eka adabhuta AkarSaNazakti che. je rAjyamAM teo jAya che e rAjyanI rAjakumArI potAne emanI samakSa arpita karI de che. zrIpAla puruSa thaIne nA kema pADI zake?' huM avAka thaI devarSine joI rahI. temaNe hasIne kahyuM : "videzanA te te rAjAo mahAbaLavAna vIrapuruSo che. teo prANanuM balidAna ApavA sadAya taiyAra rahe che. tethI zrIpAle lagna dvArA e vIrabhUmi sAthe mitratA sthApita karI che. bIjA arthamAM, AvatA yuddha mATe emane patrikA ApI AvyA che. A rAjanaitika kAraNothI zrIpAlanAM lagno AvakAravA yogya che." mane AzvAsana maLyuM. rAjanaitika kAraNothI jo zrIpAla so patnI sAthe mANasA 285 For Private And Personal Use Only

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lagna kare to mane duHkha nathI. paNa bIjI koI 2maNIne mArA karatAM vadhAre suMdara, viduSI ke premamayI mAnIne enA premamAM aMdha thaIne lagna kare to e mAre mATe ghora apamAna Tharaze. manamAM ne manamAM prabhune prArthanA karatI hatI ke 'dezahitamAM zrIpAla bhale so nArIne vare, paNa premamAM paDIne koInI sAthe lagna na kare!' Acharya Shri Kailassagarsuri Gyanmandir mArI eka sakhI hatI mAyA. mAyAno artha che. indrajAla. mamatA, moha, zaThatA! A badhAMne bhegAM karavAthI je artha thAya che te ja che jIva! eTale ke jIvana mAyA che! devarSi nAradanA gayA pachI huM kaMIka vyAkuLa thaI gaI hatI. ajANapaNe IrSyAthI baLatI hatI. abhimAnathI kSINa thatI hatI. rAjanaitika kAraNothI zrIpAla ekathI vadhu patnIono svIkAra karI rahyA che e paNa jiddI mana svIkArI zakatuM na hatuM. mAyA mAruM manaparivartana karavA hajAra prayatna karatI rahI. mArA kAnamAM kahetI hatI 'mahArANIjI! konA mATe brahmacAriNInuM jIvana! kaThora tapasyA, sAdAIbharyuM jIvana, nidrAvihIna rAtamAM konI vyAkuLa pratIkSA? niSThura zrIpAla mATe? teo to A daramiyAna traNa traNa kanyAo sAthe dAmpatyano AnaMda laI cUkyA che. Apane bhUlI gayA haze. Avaze tyAM sudhImAM ApanA mATenI utkaMThA, kutUhala, AkarSaNa ochAM nahIM thaI gayAM hoya? Apa rUpavatI cho, viduSI cho, zreSTha nArI cho. A jIvana sukha mATe che. upabhoga ne AnaMda mATe che. sukhanI AzAmAM ja mANasa asahya duHkha sahana karI le che. paNa A sukha to zrIpAle samApta karI nAMkhyuM che. bhUlI jAo emanI vAta... yauvana ApanI pAse AvIne sthira thaI gayuM che. vipula vaibhava ApanAM caraNomAM ALoTe che...' 286 jIvananI paLepaLa mUlyavAna che, paNa yauvananI dareka paLa amUlya hoya che! jIvanano upabhoga karo, mahArANI. zrIpAla pAchA AvIne jue ke Apane duHkha devA mATe emaNe je kAvataruM karyuM hatuM, e niSphaLa gayuM che...' mAyA madhamAkhInI jema mRdu guMjanamAM kahetI hatI. jIvanano artha For Private And Personal Use Only mayaNA

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ughADI rahI hatI. koI koI vAra enI caturAI mane mohita karI jatI. mAyAnI vAtonA joramAM vahI jAuM? kSaNika jIvananI dareka paLane sukhamaya karuM? dareka mANasanA jIvanamAM asthira paLo Ave che, paNa lakSya hoya che sthiratA, zAMti ane paripUrNatA. paNa mArI sthiratA kyAM? paripUrNatA kayAM? jene nikaTa icchuM chuM te dUra che. nadInA vaheNamAM vahetA phUlanI jema... hAthathI sarakI jatI paLonI jema. mane thayuM, vIrapuruSa zrIpAla bhale AkhI pRthvInI rAja kanyAone paraNe. emAM emano zo doSa? emanA hRdayamAM mAruM sthAna avicala ane aparivartanIya ja che, ne raheze, mArI e zraddhA che! emanI huM zraddhA chuM. ane amArI zraddhA che zrI siddhacakrajI! OM zAMti... OM zAMti... OM zAMti.. mANA 287 For Private And Personal Use Only

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vAyaka oMgha For Private And Personal Use Only

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AcArya zrI kailAsasAgaramari jJAnamaMdira kobA tIrtha Acharya Sri Kailasasagamur Gyanmandir Sri Mahavir Jain Aradhana Kondra Koba Tirth, Gandhinagar 382007 (Gul.) INDIA Website: www.kobatirth.org E-mail: syanmandirokobatirth.org ISBN 978-81-89177-03-4 AJIVA GRAPHICS - 925001918 For Private And Personal Use Only