Aptavani 09

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/008831/1

Page #1
tamAma zAstro samAyA cauda AptavANIomAM !!! praznakartA : tame je 356 DigrI upara beThA cho, to tamAre dareka DigrInuM je jJAna che e AptavANImAM ApavuM joIe ne ? | dAdAzrI : hA, te A AptavANIo cauda nIkaLaze ne badhI pUrI thaze. te badhAmAM bheguM thaze tyAre emAM paruM jJAna AvI jaze. eTale maNakA pUrA thavA joIe ne ? haja to navamo bhAga chapAyo che. haju to bIjI pAMca bAkI rahI. | praznakartA : caudamI AptavANI kevI thaze , navamI | AptavANI ATalI suMdara che to ? | dAdAzrI : badhA zAstronI aMdara je jJAna pragaTa che, ne, e badhuM A cauda AptavANImAM AvI jaze . eTale bahAra pachI bIjA zAstronI lokone helpa levAnI jarUra nA rahe. A navA zAstro, A navI vAta , A badhuMya navuM ja mUkAze, A saraLa bhASA che , te lokone anukaLA Ave che. ane emAM badho ja mokSamArga batAvI dIdhelo che, kaMI bAkI rAkhyuM nathI. - dAdAzrI AtmavijJAnI e. ema. paTela nI mahIM pragaTa thayelA dAdI magAvALI ArasImAM jaya jayakAra ho zreNI zreNI AptavANI zreNI- 9 laurasiani

Page #2
AptavANI zreNI - 9 che haiM . 37__E_da dA prakAzaka C prata bhAva mUlya dravya mUlya varSa : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana (madrAsa) vatI zrI ajita sI. paTela 9, manohara pArka, egamora, madrAsa - 600 008. phona - 8261369, 8261243. H saMpAdakane svAdhIna : 5000 : 'parama vinaya' ane 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI', e bhAva ! : 50 rUpiyA (rAhata dare) : 1997 prAptisthAna : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana 1, varuNa epArTamenTa, 37, zrImALI sosAyaTI, navaraMgapurA, amadAvAda-380009. phona - (079) 6421154 pheksa - 408528 E-Mail : dimple @ad1.vsnl.net.in lesara kaMpojha : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana, amadAvAda prinTara : mArUti prinTarsa, amadAvAda.

Page #3
samarpaNa anaMta avatAra caDhyA paramapada pAmavA, mathyA, hAMphayA, thAkyA, ne anaMtIvAra pachaDAyA, sAdhaka sIdhI vATa melI, lIdhI bAdhaka galI, so kamAvA jatAM, kaSAyo thatAM baso khoTa malI. ApopuM, kapaTa, mamatA, lobha, lAlaca, caturAI, mAna, spardhA, TIkA, gurutA, aham ne judAI. kAcAkAna, pArakuM sAMbhaLavuM, pUjAvAnI kAmanA, ArAdhanA aTakAvI karAve kaMI virAdhanA. AvaDatano aham, lAlaca, palaTAve pATo, 'huM jANuM chuM' kepha, jJAnInA doSa dekhI khAya khoTo. ADAI, svacchaMda, zaMkA, trAguM, risAmaNa, udvega mokSamArgI sAdhakonAM helthI manamAM prasAre 'plega' mokSamArganAM bAdhaka kAraNone koNa batADe ? koNa choDAve ? koNa pAcho tyAMthI mULa mArge vALe ? mArganA 'bhomiyA' prakAze sarva bAdhaka kAraNa, sUkSma phoDakArI 'AptavANI' sAdhakone samarpaNa ! ////////// 3 trimaMtra

Page #4
saMpAdakIya anaMta avatArathI mokSe javA jIva jhaMpalAyelo che. keTalIya vAra caDhe che ne keTalIya vAra paDe che. dhAryuM pariNAma AvatAM roke che koNa ? mokSanI sAdhanA karanAra-karAvanArAM 'sAdhaka-kAraNo'ne keTaleka aMze pAmI zake che, kiMtu 'bAdhaka-kAraNo' jANI-joIne tenAthI virakata rahe che phakta ko'ka kALe pragaTelA jJAnI ja ! jJAnI puruSa jyAre pragaTa pratyakSa sAMpaDe tyAre ja mokSamArga Akho khullo thaI jAya che, eTaluM ja nahIM paNa TheTha sudhI pahoMcI javAya che ! e mokSamArgamAM UMce caDhavAno mArga kyAMka kyAMka maLI Avaze. paNa UMce caDhatAM caDhatAM je Denjarasa poInTasa' Ave che tenI lAlabattIo kyAMya maLatI nathI. caDhavAnA rastAnI jeTalI mahattA che tenA karatAM lapasaNiyA sthAnakonI jANakArI-takedArI anekagaNI mahattvanI che ane te takedArI vinA game teTalo puruSArtha Adare to ya te pachaDAyA ja karavAno. mArga. muktinAM sAdhana mAnIne sAdhaka je je kare che, enAthI ene mukti anubhavamAM AvatI nathI. keTalAM keTalAM sAdhana karyA pachI paNa enuM baMdhana tUTatuM nathI. emAM kaI bhUlla rahI jAya che ? chUTavA mATe chUTavAnAM kAraNo sevavAM joIe. ane je je kAraNo seve, enAthI ene chUTavApaNuM-mukti anubhavamAM AvatI jAya to ja eNe sevelAM kAraNo chUTavAnAM che ema kahI zakAya, paNa A to chUTavAnAM kAraNo seve che chatAM baMdhana chUTatuM nathI, te zAthI ? jJAnI puruSe saMpUrNa mokSamArgane joyo che, jANyo che, anubhavyo che ane te mArgane pUro karyo che. tethI te mArgane bAdhaka doSo, te mArgamAM AvatAM vighno-AvatI aDacaNo ke AvatAM jokhamo jaNAvI zake. e mArge AvanArAone doSo kevI rIte nirmUlana karI zakAya tenuM sarva jJAna, sarva upAya daI zake. jagatamAM je doSothI baMdhAyelA che evA doSo, je jagatanAM lokonI draSTimAM AvI zakatA nathI. tethI loko niraMtara evA prakAranA doSothI baMdhAIne, te doSone poSaNa ApIne mokSamArgamAMthI vimukha ja rahyA che. pUrve thaI gayelA jJAnIo mokSamArga naDatA doSonI lokone cetavaNI ApI gayelA. paraMtu mokSamArganI prApti thayA pUrve naDatA doSo, mokSamArganI prApti thayA pachI naDatA doSo, te sarvanuM vigatavAra vivaraNa hoya to mokSamArgano sAco abhilASI sAdhaka te mArgane pUrepUro pAmI zake, te mArge pote pragatimAM prayANa rAkhI zake. chatAM kharo mArga to jJAnI puruSanA caraNamAM rahIne ja pUro karavAno rahe che. pUrvenA jJAnIo kahI gayA ke krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha, enAthI baMdhana che. e doSa khalAsa thaye mukti thAya. badhA doSo krodha-mAna-mAyAlobhamAM samAya che, paNa vyavahAramAM e doSo kevA svarUpe ughADA paDatA hoya che, kevA svarUpe thayA karatA hoya che ? e to, jJAnI puruSa phoDa pADe tyAre ja samajAya. jJAnI puruSa eTale pUrNa prakAza. ane e pragaTa jJAnaprakAzamAM sarva doSothI chUTakAro thavA jJAnI puruSa pAse AlocanA khUba ja anivArya 10 AtmasAdhanA karatAM karatAM sAdhaka kyAM kyAM pote potAne ja bAdhaka banI jAya che, tenI atyaMta tIkSNa jAgRti vinA sAdhanA siddha thatI nathI. arthAt A puruSArthamAM napho prApta karavA karatAM khoTa kema aTakAvAya e ati ati agatyanuM che. jJAnI puruSa bheTI jAya ane jJAnI puruSanI oLakhANa thaI ArAdhana zarU thAya tyAre pahelAM to saMsAramAM ja, vyavahAramAM ja aTavAyelA, teo ja saMsAranI sAdhanA karanArAo ja, have mokSamArganI sAdhanA tarapha vaLe che. have bAkI rahelo vyavahAra jyAre pharajiyAta pUro karavAno rahe che tyAre jANye-ajANe saMsAranI sAdhanA ye thaI jatI hoya che, e lIkeja koNa dekhADe ? e tamAma lIkejane sIla karavAnA vyavahAra jJAna, adhyAtmajJAna temaja adhyAtma vijJAna sudhInuM jJAna, jJAnakaLA ne bodhakaLA atre pragaTa jJAnI puruSa dvArA khullAM thAya che. mokSamArga eTale muktino mArga, saMsArI baMdhanothI mukta thavAno

Page #5
upoddhAta DaoN. nIrubahena amIta banI jAya che. potAne jyAM jyAM duHkhamaya pariNAma vartatAM hoya, gUMcAmaNa thatI hoya, mUMjhavaNa thatI hoya, kaMI anubhavanI jhAMkhI thatI na hoya, kaI graMthi herAna kare che, te sarva kAMI vigatavAra jJAnI puruSane AlocanA kare to satsaMga dvArA jJAnI puruSa mahIMlA doSone khotarI kADhI Ape. jJAnI prakAza dhare, ne te prakAzamAM doSo dekhI zakAya ane doSothI chUTakAro pAmI zakIe tevo mArga jaDe. | mukhya vAta to e che ke A doSo graMthisvarUpe rahelA hoya che. te graMthi haMmezAM 'aMDara grAunDa'-bhoMyamAM daTAI rahelI hoya che. saMjogo maLatAM, pANI chaMTAtAM jamInamAM rahelI gAMThamAMthI kuMpaLo phUTe ane pAMdaDADALAM vRddhine pAme e parathI graMthinuM svarUpa oLakhAya ke gAMTha zenI che, kayo roga mahIM paDyo che ? paNa doSanuM svarUpa nathI oLakhato tyAM sudhI e doSo poSAyA ja karatAM hoya che. jJAnI puruSanA satsaMgamAM Ava-Ava karavAthI, emanI vANI sAMbhaLa-sAMbhaLa karavAthI, vAtane samaja-samaja karavAthI kaMIka jAgRti utpanna thAya ane nijadoSo oLakhavAnI, jovAnI zakti Ave. e pachI kUMpaLo UkheDavA sudhInI jAgRti utpanna thaye kAryakArI rIte puruSArtha mAMDe to e gAMThanuM nirmulana thAya. paNa e sarva sAdhanA jJAnI puruSanI AjJApUrvaka ane jJAnI puruSa ene doSo vigatavAra oLakhAve tema tema e doSonuM svarUpa pakaDAya, e jaDe, pachI e doSothI chUTavA mAMDe. Ama mokSamArganI pUrNAhuti thAya. prastuta graMthamAM pragaTa jJAnAtmasvarUpa saMpujya dAdAzrInI vANImAMthI pragaTa thayelA mokSamArganA bAdhaka kAraNonI suMdara talasparzI hRdayabhedI chaNAvaTa mokSamArgIonI samakSa thaI che te atre saMkalita thAya che, je sAdhakane pratyeka pagathiye paDavAmAMthI ugAranAruM nIvaDaze. graMthamAM sujJa vAcakane kSati-truTi bhAsatI hoya to te jJAnI puruSanI vANIne kAraNe nahi paNa saMkalanAnI khAmIne kAraNe che. te badala kSamA prArthanA. DaoN. nIrubahena amIna jaya saccidAnaMda anAdikALathI prakRti svAbhAvika rIte saMsArabhAvamaya ja baMdhAyelI che. ane jyAre potAne 'jJAnI puruSa' prApta thAya tyAre pote adhyAtmamAM praveze che. paNa pUrvabhave baMdhAyelI saMsArI svabhAvamaya prakRti saMjogonA bhIDAmAM udayamAna thayA vinA rahevAnI nathI. ane AvAM duSamakALamAM e prakRtimAM udayakarmo mokSamArganI vimukhatAvALAM ja-mokSamArgamAM bAdhakatAvALAM ja prAye vizeSa hoI zake. tevAM kALamAM prakRtimAM vaNAyelo saMsAra-abhimukha mAla ane potAnI AtmasAdhanAnA adhyAtmika puruSArthanA saMgharSamAM pote muktidazAne vijaya pAmavAnI aneka anubhavIsamajaNono jJAnI puruSa atre phoDa pADI Ape che. 1. ADAI : risAvuM H traNe sIdho ne saraLa mokSa to sIdhA ne saraLa hoya ene ja maLe. badhI rIte pAMsarA thayelA jJAnI puruSanA trikALasiddha vacano jene samajAI jAya, tene mokSa hAthaveMtamAM che. jJAnI puruSa to kahe che ke mokSe jatAM ADAIo ja naDe che ne pAMsarA thavAya to paramAtmapada prApta thAya. lokonA mAra khAIne pAMsarA thavuM enA karatAM jAte samajIne pAMsarA thavuM zuM khoTuM ? potAnI ADAIonA svIkArathI te jAya ne asvIkArathI vadhAre majabUta bane. Ama ADAIone jue-jANe ane kabUle to ja ADAI jItAI jAya. potAnI ADAIo jovAno adhikAra che. te paNa niSpakSapAtI draSTi thAya to ja potAnI ADAIo dekhAya. nahIM to ApaNI ADAIone koI cIMdhe to e potAne potAnI ADAIonI tapAsa karavAno ne kADhI nAkhavAno skopa maLyo kahevAya. nahIM to pachI bIjAMnI ADAIo dekhI, te paNa eka jAtanI potAnI ADAI ja gaNAya. ADAIo saMpUrNa jAya tyAre bhagavAna thAya. potAnI ADAIone

Page #6
vijJAna ne ADo te huM chuM ane sIdhuM mAre thavAnuM che, tenuM nAma krama !" - dAdAzrI pote dekhe tyArathI e javA mAMDe. dila Thare evI sAcI vAtano ya svIkAra nA kare te ja ADAInuM svarUpa. evAo potAne mate ja varte. jJAnInA mate cAle tenI ADAIo khalAsa thAya. prakRtinA TopamosTa guNo mokSamArge vATakharcamAM sAMpaDe. atyaMta namratA-atyaMta saraLatA-sahaja kSamA-ADAI to nAme ya nA hoya-evAM guNa pragatinuM pramANa kahI zakAya. potAnI ADAIonuM bhAna rahevuM e ja "jAgRti' che ! ADAIo maMdatAne pAmelI hoya chatAM mamatAvALo saMsAramAM ja garakI gayelo hoya, jyAre mamatArahitapaNuM hoya ane sUkSmamAM sUkSma ADAIo oLaMge to e TheTha jJAnIpada pragaTAve ! ADAInuM mULa ahaMkAra che. ADAI karIzuM to ja badhA pAMsarA thaze evuM jJAna sAMbhaLyuM-zraddhAmAM AvyuM ke pachI ADAIo vartanamAM AvyA vagara rahe nahIM. jJAnI puruSa pAse koI ADAI kare to tene jJAnI puruSa taraphathI kyAreya Teko-uttejana nA maLe. tyAM pelAe pAMsarA thaye ja chUTako ! nispRhatA AgaLa ADAIo heThI paDe, saMpUrNa savAMgI saraLa evA jJAnI puruSano rAjIpo to saraLatA guNathI saheje maLe ja ! potAnI ADAI pote jANe tyAre e pAcho pharyo kahevAya. svarUpa jJAna hoya to ja ADAI oLakhAya. ane to ja e ADAI khapatI jAya. pariNAme eka dahADo ADAI khalAsa thaIne UbhI raheze. bAkI, ADAIvALo to Akho mokSamArge ya cUkI jAya. potAnuM dhAryuM bIjA pAse karAvavA jAya to ADAI UbhI thAya ne pArakAnA dhAryA pramANe karavA jatAM ADAIo khalAsa thatI jAya. A je ADo che te huM hoya evuM jJAna thavuM, enuM nAma akrama risAvuM e paNa ADAIno ja prakAra che. risAya temAM khoTa koNa khAya ? risAya tenA mATe gADI UbhI rahe kharI ? risAya tenI sAme to keTalI gADI upaDI jAya. kAraNa ke jagata kaMI aTakavAnuM nathI. sAmo risAya che te risALa para risAya che ane je risALa che te risAnArane jue che. je risALa che te ApaNuM svarUpa hoya. ane je risAya che te AtmA hoya. AtmA AtmAne ja jue, zuddha ja jue. emAM mokSamArga samAyelo che. jJAnI puruSa pAse koI risAya tyAM jJAnI puruSanuM DiliMga kevuM hoya ? e vItarAgatAnI samaja jJAnI puruSa ja pamADI zake ! vItarAgatA sAthe niSkAraNa karuNA e ja pratyakSa jJAnI puruSanI vizeSatA che ke pariNAme sAmo doSamukta thaIne mokSamArge sthira thAya ne AtmakalyANa sAdhI zake. ADAInI caDhatI avasthAomAM risAyane to ya dhAryuM nA thAya tyAM pachI trAguM karIne ya dhAreluM sAmA pAse karAvIne ja jaMpe. dhAryuM karAvavA dhamapachADA karavA, mAthAM kUTavAM, raDavuM ane sAmAne evA sakaMjAmAM mUkI de ke, gabharAIne ya sAmo vaza thaI jAya e badhA ja trAgAnAM lakSaNo ! tevAonI pAse samajAvaTathI samAdhAna thAya nahIM to tyAMthI khasI javuM e ja upAya levo rahyo. trAguM karavuM e ya kaLA che. bhayaMkara zaktio veDaphI nAkhe che emAM. bhayaMkara khoTa khAya che pariNAme tiryaMca gati oLaMge evI jokhamadArI ya AvI paDe ! akrama vijJAnI, trAgAmAMthI bacavAnA upAya dekhADI de che. pratyeka vikRta prakRtione badhAM ja phejhIjhathI joIne-anubhavIne tenAthI mukti pAmavAnI draSTi jJAnI puruSa khullI kare che, jethI bIjAone paNa te draSTi 13 14

Page #7
karAve. zaMkA eTale ghora ajJAnatA. akrama vijJAnamAM zaMkAnI prakRtithI bacavA 'vyavasthita'nI niHzaMka dazAmAM sthira rahevAnI vaijJAnika samajaNa jJAnI puruSa dvArA AjJA svarUpe prApta thAya tema che. khUle-khIle ne jIvanamAM ADAIothI, risAvAthI, trAgAMthI pote chUTI zake athavA to ADAIovALAthI, risAnArathI ke trAgAMvALAthI pote chaTakI zake. potAnI prakRtithI chUTI javAnI jJAnakaLAo ane sAmAnI prakRtinA sakaMjAmAM na phasAtAM tenI joDe samAdhAnI nikAla thavAnI samyak prakAranI samajaNo akrama vijJAna dvArA jJAnI puruSa kahI jAya che, je mokSamArge bAdhakatA nivAravA atyaMta upakArI thaI paDe ! 2. udvega : zaMkA : noMdha sAmA pAse dhAryuM karAvavAnI rItamAM ADAIthI zarUAta karIne risAvAnI rIta ajamAve ne tema chatAM saphaLa nA thAya to trAgAM Adare. paNa to ya dhAryuM nA thAya to pote atyaMta ugane pAme che. dhAreluM karAvavAnI dAnata ghasAya to uganA du:kha-bhogavaTAthI chUTato jAya. mohanI parAkASTAothI uga sarjAya che ane ugamAM bhayaMkara karmo baMdhAI jAya che. prakRtinA vega-Avega ne uganA sUkSma phoDa jJAnI puruSa ja jaNAvI zake ! ane uganA nimitta-kAraNothI mukta thavAnI saraLa cAvIo paNa evA jJAnIpuruSa pAsethI saMprApta thAya. ugathI bacavA tenA nimitto khoLI tenAthI cheTA rahevuM ghaTe agara to e vastu game teTalI amUlya kema nA hoya, paNa to ya choDI devI paDe, paNa uddhaganA kAraNane mULathI ukheDI nAkhavAM paDe. kAraNa ke saheja paNa udvega thAya tyAMthI ja e mokSamArga nathI. akrama vijJAnamAM je ugamAM phasAya che tene pote joyA kare eTale pote mukti mANe. A to ugamAM huM phasAyo - evuM ajJAnatAthI jAta para letAM ja kharekhara pote phasAya che ! uga karAvanAruM koNa ? buddhi. vegamAMthI AvegamAM ne ugamAM e ja lAve che ane buddhi che e ja zaMkAo janmAve che. buddhizaktithI ukela na AvatAM gUMcAya, e pachI zaMkAo utpanna gharamAM sApa peTho, e nimitte je zaMkA peThI e sApa gharamAMthI bahAra jato jovAmAM nA Ave tyAM sudhI zaMkAno kIDo TADho paDe nahIM ane 'vyavasthita'nuM jJAna samajAya tyAM zaMkA utpanna thAya ja nahIM. jJAnI zrImukhe pragaTeluM vijJAna to aneka avatAronA anubhavonA pRthakkaraNano nicoDa che. aneka prakRtinA pratyeka paryAyomAMthI anubhavapUrvaka pasAra thaI lAdheluM muktinuM mULa jJAna e zodhakhoLa che jJAnI puruSanI ! manuSyonA jIvanamAM keTalAya prasaMgo evA banI jAya che temAM je bane che tyAM ene zaMkA hotI ja nathI, jyAM kudaratI krame badhuM banI rahyuM hoya tyAM zaMkA ja zA mATe ? khorAka khAdhA pachI te pacavAnI bAbatamAM zaMkA paDe che ke pacaze ke nahIM ? zaMkA zuM helpa kare che ? zaMkAzIla to jIvato hovA chatAM marelA jevI ja sthitimAM rahyo che ! dIkarIo bhaNavA jAya tenI para zaMkA rAkhe to zuM thAya ? e zaMkA to naryo ajaMpo karAve. e potAne ja duHkhadAyI che. koInA cAritra saMbaMdhamAM zaMkA lAvavI e to bhayaMkara jokhama che. e jokhama kema kheDAya ? dekhyuM nA hoya tyAM sudhI niHzaMka rahevAya. paNa pUrve tevuM na hatuM ? A kaMI rAtorAta UbhuM thaI gayuM ? nA. mATe zaMkA thatI hoya tyAM to A pahelethI Ama ja hatuM ema samajI javuM. jagata to polaMpola ja che. AtmAne vAIphe ya hotI nathI ne dIkarI ya hotI nathI. mokSamArge prayANa pachI na cUkanArAone to AtmA sivAya kyAMya UMDuM UtaravA jevuM ja nathI. kaLiyuganA prabhAvamAM dhaNI-bairI vacce morAliTI tUTI, sinsiyAriTI 16

Page #8
tUTI tyAM zAM sukha bhogavavAM ? kaLiyugamAM vAIpha potAnI thAya nahIM. naryuM kapaTa ane dagAphaTakA-vRttio ja emAM vahetI hoya ! to pachI zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM rahyuM ja kyAM ? eka pativrata ne eka patnIvrata e ja zreSTha cAritra, nahIM to pachI saMDAsa ja kahevAya ne ? - jyAM badhA ja jAya !! eka viSayanI lAlaca ja zaMkA janmAve che ne ? viSayathI chUTyA to zaMkAthI ya chUTyA. nahIM to A bhava to bagaDe ne anaMta avatAra bagADI nAkhe ! mokSe janArAe zaMkAno niSedha karavo. zaMkA thatAM ja sAmA joDe judAI paDI jAya. zaMkAnA paDaghA sAmA para paDyA vagara rahe nahIM. mATe zaMkA rAkhavI nahIM ne zaMkA paDavAnI thAya tyAM jAgRta rahI ene ukheDI nAkhavI. dIkarIo kolejamAM jAya ne mA-bApane temanA cAritra para zaMkA paDe to zuM thAya ? duHkhanuM ja upArjana thAya pachI ! gharamAM prema pamAto nathI, tethI chokarAM bahAranA pAse prema khoLavA jatAM lapase che. mitranI jema premapUrvaka rahe to A pariNAma TaLe. chatAM dIkarIno paga ADe raste paDI gayo to kaMI gharamAMthI kADhI mUkAya che ? premapUrvaka Azaro ApIne nukasAna sameTI levuM ja rahyuM ! pahelethI ja sAvadhAnI AvakArapAtra che paNa zaMkA to nahIM ja ! jyAM zaMkA nathI tyAM koI prakAranAM duHkha rahetAM nathI. zaMkA paDavI e udayakarma che paNa zaMkA rAkhavI e udayakarma nathI. e zaMkAthI to potAno bhAva ja bagaDe che. zaMkA e moTAmAM moTI nirbaLatA che, AtmaghAtI che e. jJAnI puruSa para koI zaMkA vyakta kare to jJAnI puruSa jANe badhuM ya chatAM kaMI ja banyuM nA hoya tevI sahaja dazAmAM ja varSe ane zaMkA karanArA joDe ya kiMcit bheda emanAmAM nA hoya. emanI abhedatA ja sAmA mANasane zaMkAmAMthI mukta karAve. zaMkA karavA karatAM to tamAco mAravo sAro ke jhaTa ukela AvI jAya paNa zaMkA to dina-rAta korI khAya, TheTha maratAM sudhI. 17 zaMkAzIlanuM koI kArya siddha ja nA thAya. niHzaMkatAne ja siddhi vare. niHzaMkapaNAthI zaMkA jAya. maravAnI zaMkA koIne thAya ? tyAM to jhaTa khaMkherI nAkhe. pragaTa jJAnI puruSa upalabdha che tyAM sudhI to tamAma prakAranI zaMkAonAM niHzaMka samAdhAna thAya evuM che ne to ja mokSamArge saheje ya ADakhIlI nahIM Ave. zaMkAmAM be khoTa. eka to potAne pratyakSa duHkha bhogavavAnuM ne bIjuM sAmAne gunegAra dekhyo ! akrama vijJAna zuM kahe che ke zaMkA-kuzaMkA karanArane 'pote' kahevuM ke zaMkA nA rAkhazo. kahenAra judo ne karanAra judo ! eksiDanTanI zaMkAvALA DrAyavarane gADI soMpAya ? zaMkAzIlano sAtha ja na karAya. nahIM to potAne ya zaMkAmAM nAkhI de. jene zaMkA paDe tene ja muzkelI Ave e kudaratano kAyado che ane je zaMkAne gAMThe nahIM ene koI aDacaNa ja nathI. AMkhe dITheluM khoTuM Thare evA jagatamAM zaMkA zuM sevavI ? zaMkAnuM eka ja bI AkhuM jaMgala karI nAkhe ! zaMkAno cheda to bIja gaNitanI jema uDADI devo. chevaTe jJAnapUrvaka pote potAnI jAtathI judA rahIne zaMkA karanArane dhamakAvI, laDhIne ya zaMkA UDADavI. zaMkA karyAno bhogavaTo turata Ave ja. paNa joDe joDe navuM bIja naMkhAya te AvatA bhave ya bhogavaTo lAve ! zaMkA yathArtha pratikramaNathI dUra thAya. zaMkA sAme pratikramaNa karavAnAM che, niSphikarA nathI thavAnuM. jeNe zaMkA karI, je atikramaNa kare che tenI pAse pratikramaNa karAvavAnuM che. puruSa thayA pachI mahIM mana ADuM-avaLuM dekhADe to tene kema gAMThIe ? lepAyamAna bhAvo e badhA pudgala bhAvo che, jaDa bhAvo che, 18

Page #9
prAkRta bhAvo che. AtmabhAvo te nathI ja. pote anaMta zaktino dhaNI, tene koI zuM karI zake ? ema zUravIratA ja niHzaMkatAmAM pariName che ! zaMkAnI sAme jAgRti vadhAravAnI ja jarUra che. ne jAgRti hoya to ja jJAtA-draSTA rahI zakAya. ne tyAra pachI zaMkA paNa nirmulanapaNAne pAme che. ApaNA para koI zaMkA kare, te kaMI gamyuM nathI. AmAM ApaNo ja kaMIka doSa che. bhale atyArano nahIM hoya to pAchaLano, to ja AvuM bane. kAyadAnI bahAra jagata eka sekanDa paNa gayuM nathI. mithyAjJAna para vahema eka jJAnI puruSa ja pADI Ape. ane je jJAna para zaMkA paDI, te jJAna UDI jAya. sAcA jJAna para kyAre ya zaMkA nA paDe. | 'pote koNa che ?" potAnA nAmadhArIpaNA para to bhavobhavathI niHzaMka che, tyAM zaMkA karavAnI che ! potAnI avaLI gADha mAnyatAo para zaMkA paDe to samakita thavAnI taiyArIo gaNAya. AtmA zuM haze ? kevo haze? e saMbaMdhanI zaMkA javI ati kaThina che. krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha konA guNo haze, e zI rIte samajAya ? e to pratyakSa jJAnI puruSa samajAve to ja samajAya ne to zaMkAthI mukta thAya. AtmA kevo haze ? zuM haze? enI vicAraNAmAM jIvana vitAvavAnuM che, nahIM ke beDarUmamAM ne sinemA-hoTalomAM !! jAta jAtanA saMdeha kyAre jAya ? vItarAga ne nirbhaya thAya tyAre. AtmAnI zaMkA koNa kare che? mULa AtmAne evI zaMkA ja nathI. A to 'pote ja "mULa AtmAnI zaMkA kare che. AtmAsaMbaMdhI niHzaMka thAya, tene niraMtara mokSa ja che ne ! atyAra sudhI je jJAna laIne pharyA, je je jJAnanAM sAdhano karyA, te sarva para zaMkA paDI tyAMthI mAMDIne AtmAsaMbaMdhI saMpUrNa niHzaMkatA nA thAya tyAM sudhInI adhyAtmamAM zaMkA kahI. e niHzaMkatA thaye nirbhayapada prApya bane ! ane nirbhayatA tyAM sarva saMgomAM ya asaMgatA ! akrama vijJAnanI ajAyaba balihArI che ke eka kalAkanA adbhuta jJAnaprayogathI pote AtmAsaMbaMdhI kAyamano niHzaMka banI jAya che. pustaka vAMcI AtmAsaMbaMdhI zaMkA nA jAya. tyAM to pratyakSa jJAnI ja joIe. vadhAre jANyuM tenI vadhAre zaMkA. 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI' thatAM ja niHzaMkatA. jenAthI kaSAya jAya te jANeluM sAcuM ! jyAM zaMkA tyAM saMtApa. niraMtara niHzaMkatA e nizAnI che. AtmA jANyAnI. zaMkA paDavI e eka prakAranI jAgRti che. "A meM kahyuM ke koNe karyuM?" e zaMkA paDavI e UMcI jAgRti kahevAya. "huM tanmayAkAra thaI gayo." evI je zaMkA paDe che, e paNa eka prakAranI jJAnajAgRti ja che. aMtima jJAna jAgRtimAM to 'tanmayAkAra thavAnuM ja nathI" evuM bhAna ja rahe. jJAnI puruSanI dazAmAM vyavahAra badho pudgala kare ne pote vItarAga rahe. prati paLa vyavahAramAM hovA chatAM kazAnI noMdha nahIM. noMdha thAya to draSTi malina thaI jAya. A jJAnI puruSanI AMkhamAM niraMtara vItarAgatA ja bhaLAya. sAco prema tyAM noMdha nathI. noMdha nahIM tyAM Tenzanarahita dazA ! jagatano prema noMdhavALo prema che, ene Asakti kahevAya. je premamAM vadha-ghaTa thAya, te Asakti kahevAya. 'te dahADe tame mane evuM kahyuM hatuM' evuM mahIM thatAM ja noMdha thaI kahevAya ne pariNAme tyAM prema paravArI jAya. je potAnI gaNAya evI patnInI paNa noMdha rAkhI, tenAthI ja premamaya jIvana paNa viSamaya banI jAya. noMdha rAkhavI e khoTuM che' e prathama enI pratItimAM bese. pachI te anubhavamAM Ave. pachI AcAramAM Ave. AcAramAM lAvavAmAM A sAyanTiphika rIta che. noMdha hoya to tyAM manamAM vera rahe. noMdha nA rAkhIe to aradhuM du:kha UDI jAya. jJAnI puruSane to kyAreya noMdha nA hoya. ApaNe noMdha 19

Page #10
rAkhIe eTale sAmo noMdha rAkhe ja. prathama to noMdha levAnI zarUAta thAya. eTale mAnasika yuddha zarU thayuM, pachI vAcika yuddha ne chevaTe kAyika yuddha sudhI jaI zake. mATe mULa ja UkheDI naMkhAya, te uttama ! mokSe janArane to noMdhavahI ja kADhI nAkhavI paDe. noMdha levAnI aTakI, teno saMsAra aTakyo. saMsAramAM cokkasa te mokSa mATe acokkasa. saMsAranI cokasAI eTale saMsAranA TekAo ! noMdha karavAnI prakRtine ogALavA akrama vijJAna zuM kahe che ? ke e noMdha prakRti kare che, tene 'ApaNe' jANIe. prakRti noMdha kare eno vAMdho nathI, paNa enI joDenI 'ApaNI' sahamati UDI eTale noMdha UDI. noMdha karavAnI' Teva vijJAna vinA chUTe nahIM. saMsArI svabhAva to maraNa pasaMda kare paNa noMdha choDavAnuM nApasaMda kare. jyAM karmono udaya ne asta niraMtara thato hoya evAM badalAtAM karmonI noMdha te kema levAya ? noMdha kaI rIte levAI jAya che ? koI paNa nimittathI saheja paNa potAne arUci ke rUci thaI to tenI noMdha levAI ja jAya. paNa tyAM e nimitta joDe noMdha na rahe to e puruSArtha mokSane pamADe. noMdha thAya tyAM pote pudgalamAM tanmayAkAra thaI ja jAya. pachI sattA ya pudgalanI ja varte. potAnI svasattA tyAM AvarAya. noMdha levAthI mana te pratye DaMkhIluM thAya ne jene noMdha levAnI baMdha thAya, te vItarAga dazA tarapha vaLyo gaNAya. 3. komata sesa : velDIMga A kALamAM komanasensa korANe mUkANI che, evuM vartamAna jJAnI puruSa bedhaDaka kahe che. 'komanasensa eTale evarIvhera eplikebala, thIyareTikala ejha vela ejha prekiTakala." komanasensanI A vyAkhyA tadana maulika ane adbhuta che. komanasensavALo to game tevA kATa khAdhelAM tALAM ya ughADI nAkhe. koInI joDe athaDAmaNamAM nA Ave. athaDAmaNane komanasensathI ja TALe, gharamAM bahAra-ophisamAM badhe ja. gharamAM tau bairI joDe matabheda ja nA paDavA de. game teTalo buddhizALI hoya paNa tenAmAM vyavahArukatA nA hoya, eTale ke komanasensa nA hoya to jhaghaDA ja thAya. jeTalo ahaMkAra DAuna thAya teTaluM game tenI joDe 'DiliMga' suMdara rIte thaI zake. badhAnI sAthe milanasArapaNAthI jAta jAtanI vAtacIta karavAthI komanasensa khIle. vyavahArano tiraskAra karavAthI komanasensa khalAsa thAya. komanasensavALAno badhA joDe sUra maLato Ave. - vyavahAramAM DisIsana levA athaDAmaNa TALavA komanasensa ja kAma lAge. saraLa mANasa chetarAya paNa badalAmAM komanasensa enI vadhatI jAya. komanasensa to tyAM sudhI kAryakArI bane che ke koI game teTaluM apamAna kare to ya 'DIprezana' nA AvavA de. svArtha-ghATa hoya tyAM komanasensa nA khIle. kAraNa ke komanasensa ghATamAM ja vaparAI jAya. koI paNa eka bAbatamAM ekasparTa thayo ke tenI komanasensa rUMdhAI. komanasensavALAne sAmAonI prakRtino sTaDI hoya tethI ja to e game tevuM tALuM kholI zake. komanasensa e eka prakAranI sUjha che ane sUjha e kudaratI bakSisa che. jyAre buddhi napho-khoTane dekhADanArI che ane prajJA to jJAna-prakAza lAvyA pachI ja utpanna thAya. komanasensa saMsAranA tALAM ukelI zake paNa mokSanuM ekuMya nahIM, jayAre prajJA mokSa tarapha laI jAya. 21 22.

Page #11
eDajasTa evarIvhera thavA mATe jJAnI puruSa kaI rIte badhe eDajasTa thaIne cAlatA hoya che tenuM nirIkSaNa karavAthI AvaDI jAya. ne je eDajasTa evarIvhera thatAM zIkhI gayo, te saMsAra tarI gayo. phariyAda karavA karatAM 'eDajasTa' thaI javuM uttama. ApaNI 'lAITa' vadhu hoya to tene DIma karI, DIma lAITavALA joDe eDajasTa thaI javuM. matabheda TALavA jJAnI puruSa cAvI Ape che ke, "ApaNe badhA eka chIe ane ApaNAmAM judAI nathI." ATaluM dararoja pAMca vakhata savAramAM bolavuM. to eka dahADo koInI joDe matabheda nahIM rahe evI veLA AvIne UbhI raheze. ApaNI ekatA para koI phAcara mAravA Ave ja kema karIne ? e ja ghAlameliyA. ene pesavA ja kema devAya ? kAcA kAnanA rahyuM kema pAlave ? hamezA koInuM tUTatuM hoya tyAM 'velDIMga' karI ApavuM. pote aDacaNa veThIne ya sAmAne 'velDIMga' karI ApavuM e bahu UMcAmAM UMco guNa kahevAya. A kALamAM velDIMga karanAro mAra khAya. be jaNanuM velDIMga karI ApyuM. e baMne eka thaI gayAM to ya velDIMga karanArane bhAge to nukasAna ja ! Avo mAra paDe eTale velDIMga karanAro pAcho paDe. paNa AtmAnuM jene sudhAravuM che teNe to mAra khAIne ya velDIMga karavuM ! velDIMga karatAM nA phAve to ya manamAM 'velDIMga karavuM che' evA bhAva rAkhI choDI devuM, paNa 'vikhUTA paDe to sAruM evo durbhAva to nA ja sevAya. phrekacara karI ApanArA Thera Thera maLe paNa velDIMga karanAro to viralo ja maLe. kAdava aDe nahIM e rIte nIkaLI javAnuM che. jyAM kiMcit mAtra koI paNa jAtanI apekSA nathI, DAgha nathI tyAM saMpUrNa zuddhatA hoya, te ja jJAnI dazA ! jJAnI puruSane dehanuM paNa mamata nA hoya. jJAnI puruSa ahaMkAra ne mamatArahita hoya. mamatA eTale "mAruM" che ane tethI huM khaDuM rahyuM che. mamatAno vistAra to "mAro dehathI mAMDIne 'mArI vahu, mAruM ghara, mAruM gAma, mAro deza, mArI duniyA' sudhI vistare tema che. mamatA bAunDrIpUrvakanI hovI joIe. mamatAnI bAunDrI eTale ApaNe jIvatAM hoIe tyAM sudhI ja enuM astitva hoya. dAkhalA tarIke A deha, to ethI AgaLanI mamatA ApaNI javI joIe, e pachI ekanA eka dIkarA mATenI paNa ! nahIM to e vistArelI mamatA du:khadAyI ja che. isyoransa lIdhelI sTImara DUbe to isyoransavALAne keTalI ciMtA thAya ? evI mamatA hoya to kazI upAdhi nA karAve. baMgalo vecyAnA dastAveja thaI gayA pachI baMgalo baLI jAya to kaMI thAya ? nA. dastAvejanA kAgaLiyAthI mamatA UDI jAya to zuM sAcI samajaNathI mamatA nA jaI zake ? bAkI, baMgalo to kahe che ke "zeTha, kAM to huM jaIza kAM to tuM jaIza." saMgrahasthAnanI zarto zuM? mahIM jovAnI-pharavAnI badhI ja chUTa paNa joDe laI nA javAya. evuM A manuSyone badhuM ja ahIMnuM ahIM ja mUkIne nirAMte ThAThaDImAM mAnabhera sUtAM sUtAM javAnuM ! evA jagatamAM A badhI zI mAthAphoDa ?! kakaLATa thAya te mamatA zuM sUcave che ? je vAIpha kharekhara potAnI nathI, te marI jAya to du:kha kema thAya che ? lagnaveLAe ja corImAM 'mArI vahu, mArI vahu....' ema mamatAnA AMTA mArato gayo. tenAthI sAyakolojikala IphekTa thaI ne vahu para mArApaNuM peThuM. tenuM duHkha thAya che. tene 'oya mArI, hoya mArI' kare to te mArApaNAnA AMTA ukalI jAya, to du:khamukti thAya. 4. mamatA : lAlaca TUMkuM jIvana temAM eka miniTa paNa kema bagADAya ? saMsAramAM kyAMya 23 24.

Page #12
saMsAranI vastuo naDatI nathI, mamatA naDe che. je vastu para mamatA karI te vastuthI baMdhAyA. kharI rIte ApaNI kaI vastu che ? aMte to dehe ya sathavAro nathI deto ne ! mamatA vagara mare tene mokSa che. mamatA sAthe mokSamAM praveza nathI maLato. mamatA e khoTI vastu che' e jJAna thavuM moTAmAM moTI kamANI akrama vijJAna to teTale sudhI phoDa pADe che ke jene mamatA che te 'ApaNe' nhoya. svarUpajJAnIne mamatA hoya te prAmeTika mamatA hoya, DrAmAmAM mamatA hoyane evI ! mamatA vagarano bhogavaTo kevo mukta manano hoya ! jiMdagImAM lAlaca jeNe karI nathI, e bhagavAnane khoLI kADhe ! eka prakAranI lAlacavALAne lobhiyo kahevAya. lAlacu ane lobhiyAmAM phera. lobhiyo eka ja dizAmAM lobhI hoya. jyAre lAlacane badhI ja vastuonI lAlaca hoya. jemAM ne temAM sukha bhogavI levAnI lAlaca. lAlacuno chUTakAro ya muzkela che. lAlaca to potAno dhyeya cUkAve. lAlacu ja phasAya badhe. lAlacu to potAnuM sarvasva ahita karanAro kahevAya. lAlaca to bhautika sukha bhogavI levAnI dAnatanA AdhAre UbhI thAya. emAM pachI niyama ke koI kAyado nA hoya. jyAMthI tyAMthI-yenakena prakAre ya sukha paDAvavuM ! | viSayanI lAlaca bhayaMkara duHkho notare. viSayamAM dhRNA to viSayathI chUTakAro thAya. viSayanI lAlaca che tyAM sudhI athaDAmaNo thavAnI ja. are, bhayaMkara vera paNa baMdhAya. viSayanA lAlacu aMte dabaDAvIne paNa bhogavI le. viSayanI lAlaca viSayamAM lAcAra banAvI che. tyAra pachI vahu ene mAMkaDAnI peTha nacAve. paNa sAmasAme badalo lIdhA vagara rahe ke pachI ? lAlacu to viSaya ekalAMno ja nahIM, paNa khAvAno-pIvAno, pharavAno, badhI ja vAtano lAlacu hoya. lAlacanA vicAra Ave, tene pheravavA, e puruSArtha thayo. to pachI e jokhamI nathI ane te pheravyA vagara gayA to te jokhamI bane che. lAlacu lAlacano mAryo game tevI javAbadArI vahorI le. lAlacune badhuM ja khape. jema darda davAne kheMce tema lAlacu pAse tenI lAlacanI badhI ja vastuo kheMcAI Ave. prakRtimAM hoya eTalA ja dhaMdhA karAya. lAlacanA mAryA AbhAsI dhaMdhAo karavA jatAM mAra paDe. nAzavaMta vastuonI lAlaca zI ? 'A jagatanI koI paNa vinAzI cIja mane khapatI nathI.' e nizcaya karyo ke lAlaca jAya. lAlaca janmajAta vastu che ane mare tyAre ya e bIja joDe ja jAya. ne bIje avatAre pharI pAchuM e bIja Uge. lAlacanI sAme ahaMkAra Ubho kare to te jAya. paNa pachI e ahaMkArane pAcho dhovo to paDe ja. jJAnI puruSanI hAjarImAM game te roga hoya te nIkaLI jAya. lAlacamAMthI chUTavAno bIjo upAya e che ke lalacAvanArI badhI cIjo baMdha karI de. ene yAda ja nA kare ane yAda Ave to ya pratikramaNa karyA kare, to emAMthI kyAreka chUTe. lAlacu e dagAkhora kahevAya. jJAnI puruSanI AzA oLaMgI jAya. eTale tyAM jJAnI kRpA ya nA utare. jJAnInI AjJAmAM ja rahevAno daDha nizcaya thAya ne mana-vacana-kAyAthI khUba khUba sTroMga thAya to kaMIka lAlaca jAya. lAlacu to jagatamAM koIne sukha nA Ape, badhAne du:kha ja Ape. kusaMgathI lAlaca pesI jAya. kusaMgano pAsa to jhera karatAM ya vasamo. 25

Page #13
lAlaca mULa jJAnane pragaTa nA thavA de. e buddhijJAnamAM ja jaIne aTake. prathama potAnI bhUlo dekhAya, tenI pratIti bese. khAtarI thAya pachI puruSArtha mAMDIne lAlacanI bhUlo bhAMgI zake. pUjAvAnI lAlaca to rItasaranI ToLakIo UbhI karAvIne potAne pUjAvaDAve. tenuM phaLa zuM Ave ? narkagati. guru thaI besavuM ne te pada bhogavavuM e ya lAlaca ! A to bhayaMkara roga gaNAya. saMsAra roga nirmULa karavo hoya to eka bhava jJAnInI AdhInatAmAM kADhavo. tenAthI judI daMDakI nA vagADAya. jene kaMI paNa lAlaca nathI, tene bhagavAna paNa pUchanAra nathI. 5. mAta : garva : gAravatA mohanIya kArya pUruM thAya tyAre jJAnAvaraNa tUTe evuM jaNAvatA jJAnI puruSa kahI jAya che ke, 'amane zeno moha hato ? amane koI paNa prakArano moha nahoto. paisA Apo ke viSaya, koI moha nahoto. eka mAnano ja moha.... pAchuM abhimAnanuM jora nahIM. abhimAna to, mamatA hoya tyAre abhimAna thAya. A to mamatA vagaranuM mAna !'' apamAna, apamAna ne apamAna ja jene nAnapaNathI maLyAM hoya, tene mAnanI bhUkha jabarajasta rahe. mAna, mAna ne mAna ja jyAMthI tyAMthI maLyuM hoya, tene mAnanI bhUkha maTI jAya. mAnIne mAna maLe to tenI lobhanI gAMTha chUTatI jAya, jyAre lobhiyAne game teTaluM mAna maLe to ya lobhanI gAMTha nA chUTe. mAna hoya to paNa te calAvI levAya. paNa 'kyAMthI mAna maLe, kyAMthI mAna maLe' evo upayoga rAta-dahADo rahe te bhayaMkara jokhamI. mAnano to nikAla thaI zake paNa mAnanI bhUkhanuM muzkela che. loka mAna Ape te nirAMte cAkhavuM paNa tenI Teva na paDI javI joIe. vaLI je mAna Ape, tenI para rAga nA thaI jAya te jovuM joIe. mAna cAkhavAmAM jAgRti maMdatAne pAme ne mAnamAM kapaTa peThuM to aMdhAruM ghora thaI jAya. mAna cAkhavAno vAMdho nathI paNa mananI vikRti kephamAM pariName teno vAMdho che. mAnanuM astitva ja kadarUpuM banAve pachI te AkarSaNarUpa nA thaI zake. sAmAne halako mAnyo tethI mAna TakyuM che. mAnano premI eTalo ja apamAnano premI thaI zake ? potAnuM apamAna kyAMka na thaI jAya enuM ja lakSa rahyA kare. e mAnanI bhIkha peTI kahevAya. A mAna-apamAna kone sparze che ? AtmAne ? nA. e ahaMkAra bhogave che. jo 'tame' 'AtmasvarUpa' ho to tamAruM koI apamAna karI zake ja nahIM. AtmAne kaMI mAna-apamAna vaLage ? akrama vijJAnamAM 'jenuM apamAna thAya che, te 'pote' hoya kahetAM ja pote chUTo paDI jAya che. apamAna karanAro upakArI dekhAya to mAna kapAya. ajJAnatAmAM apamAnano bhaya jato rahe to naphaphaTe ya thaI jAya, ne jJAna pachI apamAnano bhaya jato rahe to saMpUrNa svataMtra thaI jAya. mAnanA aneka paryAyo che. abhimAna, ghamaMDa, tumAkhI, tuMDamijAjI, ghemarAjI, macharALa, svamAna, mithyAbhimAna. 'mAruM nAma lalavo' kahe to jANavuM ekalo ahaMkArI kahevAya. 'mAruM nAma lallubhAI' kahe to e mAnI paNa kahevAya. 'huM lallubhAI vakIla, mane nA oLakhyo ?" e abhimAnI. kazo ya mAla nA hoya to ya kaheze, 'huM game tene harAvI pADuM" e ghamaMDa. nahIM samajaNano chAMTo ke nahIM lakSmIno, chatAM mijAja pAra vagarano, e tuMDamijAjI, tumAkhIvALo to game tevAM moTA zeTha jevA mANasane ya haDadhUta karI mUke ! jene ne tene chI chI ryA kare, ne potAthI be mAIle ya nA javAtuM hoya to ya kaheze, ke AkhI duniyA pharI AvuM, e ghemarAjI ! hama judo, ahaMkAra judo, ahaMkAra jAya, paNa 'hama" nA jAya jI. jyAM kazo ja mAla nA hoya tyAM hama UbhuM thAya. 'hama' juduM ne 'huM kaMIka 28

Page #14
chuM' e ya juduM ! jyAM pote nathI tyAM potApaNAno Aropa karavo, enuM nAma ahaMkAra. ahaMkAranuM astitva darekamAM hoya ja, jJAnI puruSa sivAya. vistarelo ahaMkAra eTale mAna. mamatAsahita mAna e abhimAna. A mAro baMgalo, A mArI moTara ema pradarzita kare e abhimAna. abhimAna che tyAM saMyama nathI ne jJAne ya nathI, tyAM ajJAna che. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e ja ahaMkAra ne 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' to e nirahaMkAra. svarUpajJAna pachI mULa ahaMkAra gayo paNa ahaMkAranA pariNAma rahyAM. ahaMkAranAM sarvapariNAma khatama thAya tyAre kevaLajJAna thAya. | 'ApaNA ahaMkAranA pariNAmathI koIne kiMcitmAtra du:khe na ho' evo bhAva karavAno. chatAM koIne du:kha thaI jAya to tenuM pratikramaNa karI AgaLa cAlavA mAMDavAnuM. mAna ane svamAnamAM zuM aMtara ? mAna eTale igo vItha rIca maTeriyalsa. ane svamAna eTale potAnI je lAyakAta che teTalA pUratuM ja mAna. potAnA mAnane saheje ya saLI nA thAya, te jue e svamAna. vyavahAramAM svamAna e sadguNa che paNa jyAre mokSe janArAone svamAnathI ya mukta thavuM paDe. apamAna sAme rakSaNa kare te svamAna. abhimAnI to hoya, tenuM ja pradarzana kare ne mithyAbhimAnI to kazuM ya nA hoya to ya 'amAre Ama che ne tema che" ema ThokAThoka kare. apamAna thavAM emAM mAna mApavAnuM tharmomiTara che. apamAna kare ne te aDe to jANavuM ke e jabarajasta mAnI che. nirmAnIne 'huM nirmAnI chuM' evo ahaMkAra. nirmAnIpaNAno ahaMkAra to vadhAre sUkSma ! e ahaMkAre ya zUnya thAya to ja kAma thAya. - jJAnI puruSa saspRha-nispRha hoya. sAmAnA pudgala mATe saMpUrNa nispRha ne enA AtmA mATe saMpUrNa saspRha. jJAnI puruSamAM unmattatA nA hoya. lokone to gajavAmAM jarA rakama paDI hoya ke chAtI TAITa thaI jAya, ne unmata ! ane jJAnIne to jabarajasta vaibhava sAmethI AvIne paDe chatAM ya emanAmAM kiMcitmAtra unmattatA nA hoya. jJAnI puruSane potApaNuM nA hoya. mana-vacana-kAyA pratye potApaNuM ja nA hoya ne ! jJAnI puruSamAM garva nA hoya. 'huM karuM chuM, meM kahyuM" e badhuM ya garva. svarUpamAM Ave to garva mATe. 'meM karyuM' evuM thatAM ja mahIM mITho garvarasa utpanna thayA vagara rahe ja nahIM. 'huM hato to thayuM' e ja garvarasa. jagatamAM garvarasa jeTalo mITho rasa kazAmAM nA hoya. garvarasa zI rIte jAya ? e vijJAna jANavAthI jAya. kayuM vijJAna ? 'A koNa kare che? te jANe to pote karato nathI e samajAya. ne pachI 'huM karuM chuM'no garvarasa utpanna ja nA thAya. jJAnI puruSane koI kriyA 'meM karI' evuM nA hoya. 'jANuM chuM'no kepha caDhe te to bhayaMkara jokhama ! jJAnI vinA e roga kyAreya nA jAya, jhera karatAM ya bhayaMkara. aham rAkhavo hoya to huM kaMI ja jANato nathI'no rAkhavo. sAmo prazaMsA kare tenAthI Akho dahADo mastImAM rahe te sarva prazaMsA. ne garvarasa to 'meM kevuM sarasa kyuM !' huM karuM chuM' evo ahaMkAra garvarasa cAkhavAnI Teva pADe. garvarasa nA cakhAya, te mATe zuM karavuM ? kazuM karavAnuM ja nathI. svarUpajJAna prApta thayuM hoya, teNe jJAna ja jANavAnI jarUra ke garvarasane cAkhanArA ApaNe hoya ane ApaNe zuddhAtmA chIe e lakSamAM rAkhavuM joIe. jJAnI puruSa gAravatAmAM nA hoya. gAravatA eTale unALAmAM kAdavamAM beThelI bheMsane kAdavanI ThaMDaka kAdavamAMthI bahAra nIkaLavA nA de, 30

Page #15
tema bhautikasukhamAM paDelAone rasa-gAravatA, riddhi-siddhi gAravatA, zAstra-gAravatA saMsAramAMthI bahAra nIkaLavA nA de. e to jJAnI puruSa karuNA karI bahAra kADhe tyAre nIkaLAya. jJAnI puruSanI samajaNathI ene samajAya ke bhautikamAM sukha nathI, sukha AtmAmAM ja che evI pratIti bese. pote tema daDha nakkI kare tyAre gAravatA chuTavA mAMDe. akrama vijJAna ema kahe che ke zuddhAtmA pada prApta thayA pachI gAravatAnI asara jene thAya che te pote nathI ane e khyAlamAM jAgRti rahe. eTale gAravatA khalAsa thatI jAya. garva nathI, gAravatA nathI, aMtaraMga spRhA nathI, unmattatA nathI, potApaNuM nathI, evI gajabanI jJAnadazAmAM vartatA pratyakSa jJAnI puruSane Azraye javAthI anaMta avatAranI khoTa eka avatAramAM bhAMgI jAya ne mokSaprAptinI geraMTI maLI jAya. 6. laghutama H gurutama jJAnI puruSanI dazA, e vyavahAramAM laghutama ne nizcayamAM gurutama ! jJAnI puruSa koInA guru nA hoya. e koInA uparI nahIM, tema ja emano koI uparI nahIM, bhagavAna paNa nahIM. bhagavAna to jJAnI puruSane vaza varte. je koInAmAM ahaMkAra ne mamatA nA hoya, tene bhagavAna vaza varte ! jagatamAM sahu koIne gurutama thavuM game. laghutama nA game. gurutama thavA gayo, te cAra gatimAM rakhaDavAno ne laghutama thayo te vahelo mokSe jAya. akrama vijJAna zuM kahe che ? rileTivamAM laghutama, riyalamAM gurutama ne svabhAvamAM agurulaghu ! rileTivamAM laghutama te riyalamAM gurutama thAya ja niyamathI ! tyAM bhagavAna bheTe ja. jagadguru thavAnuM nathI, jagatane guru karavAnuM che. gurukillI vinAnA guru eTale e bhAre thaI beThA kahevAya. e pote DUbe ne upara besanArane ya DUbADe. gurukillI to jJAnI puruSa pAsethI ja maLelI hovI joIe. gurukillI eTale 'huM ziSyano ya ziSya chuM, laghutama chuM' evI niraMtaranI jAgRti. - darekanA AdhyAtmika DevalapamenTanA AdhAre guru joIe. kinDara gArTananA guru, pharsTa sTAnDarDanA, sekanDa sTAnDarDanA.... kolejanA ane chellA guru to AkhA jagatane guru kare. jyAM sudhI vyavahAramAM gurutamabhAva nahIM jAya, 'huM kaMIka chuM' evuM jAya nahIM tyAM sudhI laghutamabhAva Ave nahIM. laghutama pada prApta thavuM bahu muzkela che. e to jene riyala ne rileTivanI bhedarekhA niraMtaranI paDI gaI hoya, jJAnI puruSa thakI tene ja te pada prApta thAya. jJAnI puruSanI AjJAmAM je varyo, te laghutama padane pAmI jAya. draSTi laghutama taraphanI thaI gaI, dhyeya laghutama taraphano thaI gayo to te pada prApta thAya. - laghutama thayAnI nizAnI zuM ? gADImAMthI nava vakhata utArI pADe ne nava vakhata pAchA bolAve to dareka vakhate jarAya asara thayA vinA pote tema varte to jANavuM ke pote laghutama thayo. laghutamabhAvamAM rahevuM ane abhedadraSTi rAkhavI e akrama vijJAnanuM phAunDezana che." - dAdAzrI gurutama ahaMkArathI saMsAra sarjAyo ne laghutama ahaMkArathI saMsAra AkhI duniyAmAM sauthI 'juniyara' thAya, te AkhA brahmAMDano 'siniyara' thAya. gaNitamAM nAnAmAM nAnI ane avibhAjya hoya evI rakama te laghutama. ane te vyAkhyA uparathI jJAnI puruSane nAnapaNamAM ja, pUrvAzramamAM ja bhagavAna jaDI gayA ke bhagavAna ja laghutama che. tyArathI laghutama tarapha DhaLatAM DhaLatAM chevaTe saMpUrNa laghutama thayA ne bIjI bAju gurutame ya thayA. laghutama to kAyamanI salAmatI bakSe. laghutamane paDavAno bhaya ja nahIM ne ! 31.

Page #16
Athamyo. gurutama thavA jatAM resakorsa maMDAya. laghutamamAM to harIphAI ja nahIM ne ! gurutamanI ghoDadoDamAM doDIne hAMphI hAMphIne marI jAya badhA ane InAma lAge ekane ja ! TIkA, spardhA e ahaMkAranA mULa guNo che. sahu sahunAM karmo bhogave che temAM koInI TIkA kema karAya ? TIkA karavI eTale pote potAnuM bagADavuM ! AvaDatavALAo to ghoDadoDamAM hAMphI mare. enA karatAM AvaData ja nathI karIne bAjue besI rahevAmAM majhA che. jJAnI puruSa to cokhe cokhuM kahI de che ke amane dADhI karatAM ya nathI AvaDatI, ATalAM varSe ya ! AvaDatano ahaMkAra laIne pharanArAne khabara nathI ke emanI bhUlo to A kudarate bakSelI 'phekTara opha sephaTI' nIce dabAI jAya che ne pote mAnI le che ke mane kevuM sarasa AvaDyuM. jemAM AvaDatano ahaMkAra che tyAM sudhI e kAma karyuM ja javAnAM. jene kaMI AvaDe nahIM tene zuM karavAnuM ? AvaData ahaMkAranA AdhAre TakelI che. jyAM ahaMkAra ja nathI-khalAsa thayelo che tyAM AvaData zI rIte Take ? jJAnI puruSa to potAne kaMI ja AvaDatuM nathI, ema ThokI ThokIne kahe chatAM loka mAne to ne ? loka to ema ja kahe ke dAdAne to badhuM ja AvaDe che. tyAre teozrI ema kahe che ke "huM to AtmAnI vAta jANuM chuM. 'AtmA' jJAtA-draSTA che te jANuM chuM. 'AtmA' je je joI zake che e 'huM joI zakuM chuM. bIjuM kazuM AvaDatuM nathI." sAmo kheMce tyAM jJAnI dhIme rahIne DhIluM mUkI choDI daIne AgaLa cAlavA mAMDe. sAmo kheMce ne pote yu kheMce to pragati rUMdhAya. jene jevuM dekhAya tenI te pakaDa pakaDe temAM eno zuM doSa ? jene mokSe javuM che tene to jagata gAMDA kahe, mAre, kADhI mUke to ya tyAM hArIne besI javuM. sAmAne jItADIne jagata jItI javAnI jJAnIonI rIta ! eTale hAravAnuM jagatamAM zIkhavA jevuM che. to ja A jagatathI chUTAya. bAkI, jItavA gayo tyAM sudhI e hAryo ja kahevAya. jJAnIonI A zodhakhoLa kharekhara eDopTa karavA jevI che. jJAnI puruSa pote abudha thayA hoya, jyAre jagata to pote akkalavALA thavA ke kahevaDAvavA pharatuM hoya !! 'ekasparTa' bahu tyAre eka sajekaTano thaI zake. tenAM karatAM 'sabameM babUcaka' e sauthI sAruM ! badhAmAM babucaka hoya tenuM gADuM sArI rIte cAle. kAraNa ke darekanA e kasparTa bhADe maLe. vakIla bhADe maLe, DokaTara, sI.e., solisITara... are, kArakhAnuM calAvavA menejare ya bhADe maLe ! mArAmAM kaMI barakata nathI' kahyuM ke ApaNe A lokonI resakorsamAMthI chUTyA. koI bIjo ApaNane barakata vagarano kahe, tenA karatAM jAte ja nA kahI daIe to chUTAya to kharuM A jagatathI ! resakorsanA saravaiyAmAM sAra zuM sAMpaDyo ? Aje pahelo naMbara Ave to ya pAcho chello naMbara kyAre to AvavAno ja. eTale uparathI bhagavAna AvIne ya paNa ghoDadoDamAM doDavA lalacAve to nA pADI devI ! resakorsamAMthI khasI jatAM ja vyaktitva jhaLakavA mAMDaze. resakorsane ne parsanAliTIne baMnene meLa paDe nahIM ! akrama vijJAnano TUMko ne Taca korsa karI lIdho, tenuM anaMta avatAranuM sATuM eka korsamAM pUruM thaI jAya evuM che. pachI kAyamanI nirbhayatA, asaMgatA, vItarAgatA ! 7. kheMca : kapaTa : poInTameta akrama vijJAna' e jJAnI puruSanA anubhavapUrvakanuM vijJAna che ane te vijJAna vyavahAranI ke adhyAtmanI tamAma prakAranI gUMco ukelI nAkhe tevuM che. akrama vijJAna prApta thayuM, tenuM jIvana kevuM hovuM ghaTe ? bilakula 3

Page #17
kheMca vagaranuM. potAnI sAcI vAtane jAhera kare paNa koI svIkAre nahIM to tene sAcI TharAvavAnI ya jarUra nA jANe. ane vakhate kheMca UbhI thAya prakRtimAM bharelA mAlane hisAbe, to tene paNa 'jovI' to 'pote' mukta thaI jAya. mokSamArgamAM kAyado nathI. sahejAsaheja je bane te kharuM ! no laoNlaoN ! bAkI, eka kAyado karavA jatAM kAyadAono DuMgara khaDo karavo paDe. kAyado che tyAM sahajatA nathI. mokSa to sahaja thAya teno che. caDase caDhyo eTale potAnuM sthAna choDIne nIce paDavuM. potAnuM sAcuM hoya chatAM ya jo enI pakaDa pakaDe to ya e ahaMkAra gaNAya. jagatanuM satya e nirapekSa satya nathI, sApekSa satya che. tenI pakaDa zI pakaDavAnI ? jJAnI puruSa to saMpUrNa nirAgrahI hoya. matabheda vinAnA thayA to jANavuM ke sAce mArga chIe. kyAMya pakaDa nA pakaDe. vALo tema vaLI jAya, tene saraLa kahevAya. badhA kaSAyomAM kapaTa bahu bhAre. kAraNa ke kapaTa haMmezAM mIThuM lAge ne dekhAya nahIM. kapaTa badhA hisAba baMdhAve. kepaTa to bebhAna karI de. eTale potAnAM kapaTanI potAne ja khabara nA paDe tethI tene kADhavuM ya muzkela. saMsAranA lAbho UThAvavA bIjAne potAnA abhiprAya pramANe kheMcavA, potAnA vizvAsamAM levA e kapaTa, e kapaTanI potAne khabara nA paDe. "mokSa sivAya mane kaMI ja khapatuM nathI' evI niraMtaranI jAgRti rahe tyAre e kapaTa javA mAMDe. roja savAre pAMca vAra ema bolavuM, enAthI jAgRti AvatI jAya. caturAIthI sAmAne vaza kare, kapaTane laIne ane kapaTano dAva pUro ramavA mATe. jene potAnA hitanI vAta che ke ahitanI e samajAya to te sAmAnI caturAImAM nA phasAya. 'potAnA sarva doSa kADhavA ja che, mokSe javuM ja che.' te bhAvanA bhAva bhAva karavAthI chUTAya. 35. saMsAramAM kyAMya mIThAza varte che tyAM sudhI nija svabhAvanuM akhaMDa dhyAna nA varte. e khaMDita thaI ja jAya. kaDavAmAM vAMdho nA Ave. mIThAzamAM maTakuM marAI jAya. jJAnI puruSa maLyA pachI mokSanA sTezane pahoMcavA ApaNI gADI meIna lAIna para hoya. paNa vacce koI 'poInTamena' bheTI jAya to gADI kaye gAma laI jAya tenuM ThekANuM nahIM. Akho pATo ja badalAvI nAkhe ! evuM bole ke ApaNane cakarAve caDhAvI nAkhe ! jJAnI puruSa cetave tyAre khabara paDe ke pATo badalAI gayo. pachI jhINavaTathI pRthakkaraNa kare to khabara paDI jAya ke kyAMthI zarUAta thaI, zuM thayuM, koNe karyuM. zA AdhAre thayuM, ApaNI kaI lAlaca lalacAvI gaI, mahIM nirAkuLatA hatI te gaI ne AkuLatA kyArathI peThI. jAgRtimAM e badhI khabara paDe. jeno vyavahAra Dagyo, teno nizcaya DagI ja jAya. kAcA kAnanA nA thAya, pATo nA badalAya to pragati thAya. samyak vAtane ja vaLagI rahevAya. ene chedatI vAtane manamAMya nA dharAya. jJAnI evA bhoLA nA hoya. eTale koI bIjA mATe laI javA phare to ya nA cUke ne ! kapaTa tyAM bhoLapaNa hoya. koI avaLuM kAnamAM reDI jAya ne mAnI jAya te bhoLapaNa. tyAM upAya to e ja ke DrAmeTika sAMbhaLIe kharuM, tene AMtarIe nahIM. paNa AdhAra to samyak para ja rAkhavAno. sahu sahunI samajaNa pramANe bole. paNa Azaro to samyak vAtano ja levAya. akrama vijJAna evuM che ke mokSamArganA game tevAM bAdhaka kAraNo AvIne UbhAM rahe chatAM ya pAra nIkaLI javAya tema che. je 'muzkela che, muzkela che' kare, tene mATe muzkela banI jAya. mAre ?" evuM koIthI bolAya nahIM. e bheda pADyo kahevAya. mAre zuM ?" evuM hoya tyAM pratikramaNa karI karIne pAchA pharavuM. 'mAre zuM ?" kahe eTale nispRha thaI gayo. te potAne bhayaMkara nukasAna kare. mokSano mArga cUkAya nahIM e ja joyA karavAnuM che ! 36

Page #18
'mArI pAchaLa zuM bolatA hatA ?" e thayuM ke tyAMthI mokSamArga UDyo. jene je bolavuM hoya, te bhalene bole. ApaNe jAtane chUpAvavI hoya to A prazna Ubho thAya ne ! | 'kAna daIne sAMbhaLe' te ya bhayaMkara roga kahevAya. ane ApaNo guno haze to bole temAM zuM vAMdho ? koI ApaNA mATe game te bole, e bhale bole. sAruM ja che. ApaNe sTroMga rahevAnI jarUra che. nAnI bhUla paNa bhayaMkara bhamAvI de ! potAnAmAM kapaTa hoya tethI to kAna daIne sAMbhaLavAnuM mana thAya. bIjAnI vAta sAMbhaLIne to ApaNuM magaja bagaDI jAya. e vAta kahenAro enA sahaja bhAve kahI jAya. paNa ApaNA dUdhapAkamAM mIThuM paDyuM tenuM zuM? ApaNI zI dazA thAya ? keTalAMka kahe che ke amAre DaranA mAryA kapaTa karavuM paDe che. paNa Dara zeno ? guno hoya tene Dara ne ! mokSanA kAmI thaI jAya tene mokSamArganuM koI bAdhaka kAraNa aDe nahIM. 'huM jANuM chuM' e mokSamArganuM moTAmAM moTuM bAdhaka kAraNa ! e ApaghAta karAve. 'huM jANuM chuM' e narI mAdakatA lAve, je javI mahA muzkela ! jene 'huM jANuM chuM kepha nathI, enuM to moTuM ya rUpALuM dekhAya. bhayaMkara ajAgRtine kAraNe to A roga utpanna thaI jAya. | 'jANuM chuM' ema mAnIne paDelI bhAMjagaDano nikAla karavA jAya to UlaTuM baphAI jAya. 'huM jANuM chuM'nI mIThAza varte ke kUMpaLo phUTe. tyAM tarata ja bhUMsI nAkhavuM. kUMpaLo phUTatAM ja cUMTI kADhavuM. nahIM to e roga vadhI jAya, jAgRti khalAsa karI nAkhe. mokSamArgamAM badhA ja bhaya-signalo jJAnI puruSa pAsethI jANI levA joIe, to ja sepha sAIDa rahe. nahIM to sTImara kaye gAma jaze, tenuM ThekANuM nahIM. jene mokSe ja javuM che tene sAco mArga jaDI Ave ja evo niyama che. 8. jAgRti : pUjAvAtI kAmatA jJAnInI samajaNe ApaNI samajaNa meLavI, temanA samAMtare cAlavAnuM. nahIM to mArga kyAre phaMTAI jaze te kahevAya nahIM. mokSamArge potAnI samajaNano eka aMza paNa cAle tema nathI. potAne sAcI samajaNa ja nathI tethI to bhaTakIe chIe ne ! sAmAnA praznonuM samAdhAna kyAre thAya ke jyAre ahaMkAra saMpUrNa khalAsa thAya, DiscArja ahaMkAra paNa khalAsa thAya tyAre. jyAM sudhI garvarasa cakhAya che tyAM sudhI cAlvAda vANI paNa nA nIkaLe. eTale buddhino, ahaMkArano rasa nA paDavo joIe. ahaMkAra gayo nA hoya ne upadezaka thaI bese to sAmAne kaMI phAyado thAya nahIM. enA kAnane sAruM lAge eTale vAha vAha kare. paNa enAthI potAne bhayaMkara nukasAna thAya. ahaMkAra ja badho khorAka khAI jAya ne Akho mokSamArga cUkAvI de ! akrama mArgamAM upadezaka thavA janArAne jJAnI puruSa lAlabattI dhare che ke, "ApaNA jJAnano eka vALa jeTaluM kahevA jAya to loko tUTI paDe. lokoe AvI zAMti joI nathI, AvuM sAMbhaLyuM nathI eTale tUTI paDe ne ! paNa pelo ahaMkAra mahIM beTho beTho hasyA kare." pUrNAhuti karavI hoya to koI jagyAe, koI pUche to ya kAcA nA paDazo. buddhino kSaya nA thAya, ahaMkArano kSaya nA thAya, paugalika icchAo khalAsa nA thAya, viSayano vicAra paNa Ave che tyAM sudhI bhArelo agni ja che. e kyAre bhabhUkI UThe, te kahevAya nahIM. upazama thayelA kaSAyo jyAM sudhI kSaya thayA nathI, tyAM sudhI upadezamAM paDavuM e bhayaMkara jokhama che. jyAM sudhI potAnI jAta mATe pakSapAta rahelo che, tyAM sudhI potAnI bhUlo nA jaDe. mUrdhAmAM ne mUrdhAmAM rAkhe. karmanA udayano jhapATo Ave tyAre 38

Page #19
udaya svarUpa thaI jAya. jAgRti AvarAI jAya ne upayoga cUke. e to jJAnI puruSanA satsaMgamAM rahyA kare to pachI e jAgRti pAchI Ave. jAgRti vastu judI che ne jJAna judI vastu che. UMghamAMthI jAgavuM e jAgRti kahevAya. jAgRtimAM kaSAyo upazamelA hoya. paNa jJAna to kyAre kahevAya ke jyAre kaSAyono kSaya thayo hoya. jema jema jAgRti vadhe tema tema karmo baMdhAya nahIM ne mahIM ekadama cokhkhuM karI nAkhe. jyAM sudhI mAnamAM kapaTa hoya, te jAgRti utpanna nA thavA de. kapaTa eTale DhAMkavuM ne UMdhe raste ja laI jAya te. kapaTa ne ahaMkAra-krodha, mAna mAyA-lobha ja UMdhe raste laI jAya. jyAre koI paNa prakAranA kapaTano aMza nA rahe, viSayano vicAra zuddhAM nA Ave, kaSAyo nirmULa thaI jAya tyAre jAgRti che e 'jJAna'mAM pariName. 'jJAnI puruSa'no Azaro chUTyo ke kaSAyo vaMzAvALI sAthe caDhI bese. are ! kaSAyo to game te raste jJAnIno Azaro choDAvavA phare. jarAka mIThAza vartI ke kaSAyone khorAka maLyo. kaSAyone traNa varSa sudhI nAme ya khorAka nA maLe to te nirvaMza thAya. paNa jo jarAka khorAka maLyo ke pAchA tagaDA thaI jAya ! jJAnIpada tyAre maLe ke kaSAyo kyAreya jamI nA jAya eTalI badhI jAgRti joIe. jJAnI mAthe hoya to ja kaSAyone jItI zake. emano Azaro nA choDavo. jJAnI puruSa jyAM sudhI sarTiphAya nA kare tyAM sudhI upadeza apAya ja nahIM. mahIM badhA doSa taiyAra ja besI rahelA hoya te tarata caDhI bese. badhA guNo kSAyaka thAya tyAre enI meLe e pada Avaze ! jAgRti to tene kahevAya ke cora nA pese. potAnA dareka doSo dekhAya. ahaMkAra paNa dekhAya. e ahaMkAra ahIM che ja ane e garvarasa cakhAvaDAve che. koIe jarA kahyuM ke tame bahu sarasa karyuM ke tarata ja garvarasa cAkhI le. e ja pachI pADI nAkhene ! A mIThuM, A kaDavuM bheda bhAMge 39 tyAM jJAna che. satsaMgamAM koInA praznonA khulAsA jJAnI puruSa sivAya koIthI nA karAya. phakta sahejAsaheja vAtacIta thAya paNa potAnI jAtane jarAya vizeSa mAnyuM ke viSa pharI vaLyuM samajo ! jAgRti vadhatI jAya tema tema upazama kaSAyo kSaya thatA jAya. jene jAgRti utpanna thaI, teNe sAmAyiko-pratikramaNo karI karIne doSo kSaya karavA mATe jAgRtino phAyado UThAvI levAno. 'dAdA'nA bALaka banIne sIdhe sIdhuM cAlyA javAmAM majhA che. dAdAnA bALaka banyA to dAdA UMcakaze ne moTA thayA to jAte cAlavAnuM ne pachI rakhaDavAnuM ! e to jyAre TapalAM paDe tyAre pAcho Ave. pUjAvAnI kAmanA e bhayaMkara roga che, AtmaghAtI che, koI je'je' kare, tenI pachI Teva paDI jAya. AtmA to pUjya che ja ane dehanI rAkha thavAnI tene pUjAvA phare che ! A rogathI to mokSa aTakyo che. jJAnIthI saheja svataMtra mArga kADhyo ke bhayaMkara bhUlabhUlAmaNImAM peThA. jJAnInI pUMThepUMThe vahI javAnuM kahyuM tyAM ADaphAMTo kema poSAya ? e jokhama kema kheDAya ? e badhuM ja pachADe chevaTe ! je je mokSamArgane bAdhaka karanAruM AvIne UbhuM rahe tene tarata ja UkheDIne pheMkI devAnuM. to dhyeyane vaLagI rahevAya. dhyeya mokSano karavA jAya. paNa mahIM dAnata khorI hoya to dhyeyane UDADI mUke. dhyeyane toDAve te ja duzmana. mokSe javuM hoya to pote eTaluM makkama thaI javAnuM ke A dehanuM je thavAnuM hoya te thAva paNa mokSamArgane nahIM cUkuM, kAma kADhI ja levuM che. to tenuM kAma pUrNa thAya. ATalo ja bhAva karavAno che, daDha nizcaya karavAno che. mokSamArganAM A bhayasthAno jJAnI pAsethI jANI laI tyAM niraMtara 40

Page #20
cetatA rahevAnuM che. je kaMI bhUlo thaI hoya tenI jJAnI pAse AlocanA karI pAchAM pharI chUTI javA jevuM che. mokSamArgamAM pUjAvA javAya nahIM. jagatakalyANa karavAno dhyeya kartAbhAve rakhAya nahIM ane ahaMkAra karAya nahIM. mokSamArgamAM to guptaveze cAlI nIkaLavAnuM che. TheTha sudhI jJAnI puruSano satsaMga ne jJAnI puruSano Azaro choDAya nahIM. jJAnI puruSanA doSa nA jovAya. bhUla nA kaDhAya. temanI nava vAto samajAya ne eka na samajAya to tene korANe mUkI 'veITa enDa voca" karavuM. enI meLe pachI samajAze. 9. potApaNuM paramAtmA jJAnI puruSane AkhA jagata joDe abhedatA hoya. koI joDe judAI nA hoya. jJAnI puruSamAM buddhi hoya to ja bheda paDene ! abudha to abheda hoya vizvasaMge ! abhedatA jJAnane puSTa kare. judAIthI zaktio veraNa-cheraNa thaI jAya. potApaNuM jAya tenI judAI jAya, e abheda thAya badhAthI. A e. ema. paTele ApApaNuM choDI bhagavAnane samarpita karyuM che. jenuM ApopuM gayuM, te bhagavAna joDe abheda thaI gayo, jANavuM. jJAnI puruSane potApaNAnuM unmelana thayeluM hoya. saMpUrNa saMyogAdhIna varte, nirahaMkArapaNe, poTalAnI jema jayAM javuM paDe tyAM jAya ! potApaNuM chUTe tyAre sahaja rahevAya. potAno koI mata ja nA hoya emane ! chatAM emano vyavahAra badho ja Adarza hoya. Akho dahADo e DAmeTika ja hoya. potApaNuM jAya te ja DrAmeTika rahI zake. prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare e potApaNuM kahevAya. kapaTa karIne prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare e gADha potApaNuM kahevAya. potApaNuM gayuM che tenI parIkSA zI ? nava vakhata gADImAMthI utArI pADe ne nava vakhata pAchAM bolAve to ya moDhA para ke mahIM jarA ya pheraphAra nA thAya te ! 'vyavasthita'nuM jJAna potApaNuM choDAve. jJAnI puruSa sivAya badhAne ja potApaNuM hoya. potApaNuM jAya to e bhagavAna thayo ! eka phero potApaNuM gayuM eTale e kAyamanuM gayuM. 'jJAna' prApta thayA pachI cArja ahaMkAra jAya paNa DiscArja ahaMkAra rahe. ene potApaNuM kahevAya. ane e ya khalAsa thaI jAya, tenuM potApaNuM gayuM kahevAya. jeTalI jAgRti eTalA pramANamAM potApaNuM jAya. potApaNuM javA mATe kyA prakAranI jAgRti joIe ? ke "A huM ne A huM hoya,' 'pote' koNa che e niraMtara lakSamAM hoya, jJAnI puruSanI AjJA paLAtI hoya, sAmI vyakti nirdoSa akartA dekhAtI hoya.... game tevAM pariNAma Ave chatAM A huM hoya kahyuM ke chUTyA ! potApaNuM gayuM tyAM garva ke gAravatA nA hoya. ahaMkAranA pakSamAM, ajJAnatAnA pakSamAM besavuM, upayoga cUkAya, e badhuM potApaNuM kahevAya. 'vyavasthita' pramANe udayamAM tanmayAkAra nA thavuM e puruSArtha che. prajJA prakRtinA udayamAM tanmayAkAra nA thavA de, jayAre ajJA prakRtinA udayamAM tanmayAkAra karI nAkhe. udayamAM potApaNuM badhAne varte, 'jJAna' prApti pachI jema jema udaya Ave temAM puruSa thaIne puruSArtha kare tema tema potApaNuM khalAsa thAya. jJAnI puruSanuM ApopuM gayeluM jene dekhAyuM tenuM kAma thaI gayuM. ApopuM gayuM te thaI gayo paramAtmA ! pachI 'vyavasthita' temanuM calAvI le ! - jaya saccidAnaMda 42

Page #21
58 118 119 127 anukramaNikA 1. ADAI: risAvuM : traNuM samajavA jevI vAta 'jJAnI'nI ! 1 e na hovuM ghaTe ! pAMsarA to thavuM paDaze ne ?! | 'vAMko', te "pote' nahoya ! ADAI kabUlya ADAIonI hAra ! evuM A 'akrama vijJAna' ! ADAI, komana : akomana ! risAyA ? to 'gADI' jaze ! ADAIo, strI-puruSamAM ! temAM khoTa kone ? jovAnuM, pote potAnuM ! pachI pharI nA risAyA kadI ! ADAI chUTI jatAM "risALa' ja risAyelAne jue ! naDe mAtra AvaIo ! vItarAgatAnI anokhI rIta ! ADAInuM svarUpa ! 'vItarAga' chatAM ya 'khaTapaTa' ! samajaNathI saraLatA ! enuM nAma trAguM ! mokSamArganI vATakharco ! e trAguM na kahevAya ! nAnapaNanI ADAIo ! evAMne cheTethI namaskAra ! ahaMkAranA AdhAre ! trAgAMnA pariNAma ! 'nathI thatuM nA bolAya ! trAgAM karanArAnI sAme ! e jJAna ja vartanAmAM ! e to nAgAI kahevAya ! ADAIo darekanI judI ! tAyaphAnI sAme ! e ADAIo, aMtavALI ! A rIte ya matabheda TALyo ! saraLa, chatAM sUkSma ADAIo ! trAguM, e ya eka kaLA ! tyAM to ApaNe ja cetavAnuM ! tyAM samajaNapUrvaka cetelA ! ene 'sAnI' ja pAMsaro kare ! 18 ene trAguM bhAre paDyuM ! saraLatAthI rAjIpo prApta ! 19 prakRtimAM ja vaNAyeluM ! nATakIya ahaMkAra ! 20. trAgAMvALAthI cetatA rahIe ! e ADAI 'jANavAthI jAya ! bacavAnuM "eDajasTamenTa' ! 2. uga: zaMkA toMdha kreganI sAme ! nahIM to zaMkA nA rAkhavI ! dhAraNA nahIM, to krega nahIM ! ceto kharA, paNa zaMkA nahIM ! vega, Avega ane udvega ! jANe badhuM, to ya zaMkA nahIM ! dvega, keTalI badhI muzkelI ! 'kahenAra' ne 'karanAra', be judAM ! e paribaLothI khasI jAva ! tyAM zUravIratA hovI ghaTe ! buddhi ja lAve udvega ! A to "prIkozana' ke Dakho ?! 43 jene udvega thAya, te "pote' nahoya ! zaMkAnuM mULa ! saMzayAtmA vinazyati ! zaMkA judI, jijJAsA judI ! bhakato mATe to..... rAkhavI, vahemanI davA ! e to paramANuo pramANe ! 'grejyuDisa' pariName zaMkAmAM ! zaMkAnuM samAdhAna ?' pratyeka paryAyamAMthI pasAra ! 'te' 'seTala' kare, vyavahAra ! zaMkA nukasAna ja karAve ! zaMkA to TheTha maraNa karAve ! suMdara saMcAlana tyAM zaMkA zI ? sarva kALe zaMkA jokhamI ja ! enAM jokhama to bhAre ! aMdhArAmAM, keTalIka AMkho tANavI ?! mokSe janArAone ! cAritrya saMbaMdhI 'sepha sAIDa' ! kevI dagAkhorI A !! AvAM dagAmAM moha zA ? zaMkAnI parAkASThAe samAdhAna ! e to bhayaMkara roga ! zaMkAnI asaro ! buddhi bagADe saMsAra ! zaMkA, kuzaMkA, AzaMkA ? mohathI mUrSita dazA ! evI TIkA karavA jevI nathI ! ceto, choDIonAM mA-bApa ! zaMkA ? nahIM, saMbhALa lo !! mokSamArgIya saMyama ! zakA mATe upAya ! 'vyavasthita'thI niHzaMkatA ! mokSe javuM hoya, to.... bImAMthI... jaMgala ! 111 zaMkAzIla mana juduM, "ApaNe" judAM ! 116 pratikramaNathI 'pyaoNriTI" ! 113 tyAM "cArja thAya ! pudgalabhAvane gAMThavA nahIM ! 'zaMkA' sAme jJAnajAgRti ! 120 sAmAnA saMzayanI sAme ! 121 zaMkA karavAnI tyAM jaga niHzaMka (?)! 123 jUThA jJAna para vahema (!). 124 vahema 'ahaMkAra' para ja ! 125 bhavobhavathI niHzaMkatA ! 125 Atma saMbaMdhI niHzaMkatA.... ! 126 Ama manuSyapaNuM nA gumAvAya ! tyAre saMdeha jAya ! 128 'AtmA'nI zaMkA kone ? 128 prajJA AtmApakSI ja ! 13) niHzaMkatA-nirbhayatA-asaMgatA-mokSa ! tyAre thAya niHzaMkatA ! 13ra. bheda vijJAna 'akrama' thakI ! pachI jokhamadArI ja nahIM ! pustakathI na chUTe saMdeha ! 136 e jANeluM to zaMkA karAve ! 136 e bhUla khoLavAnI ! evI zaMkA ? tyAM "jJAna" hAjara !! 140 nija zuddhatvamAM nizaktA ! 141 zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM che ja kyAM ?! 142 DiliMga' pudgalanA, 'pote' vItarAga! 143 prema tyAM noMdha nahIM ! 144 bhUla bhAMgavI, 'sAyanTiphikalI' ? 143 noMdha' to baMdhAve vera ! 148 'vyavasthita' tyAM noMdha nahIM ! 149 paNa e saMsAramAM ja khuMpAve ! 150 to tUTaTyA TekA saMsAranA ! 150 'sahamata' nahIM, to chUTayA ! 15ra 133 139 para top 103 1o9

Page #22
195 221 222 202 159 203 101 234 e to potAnI ja nirbaLatA ! 'noMdhanArAthI judAM "ApaNe" ! 153 zaMkA suNatAM gebI jAduthI ! badalAtAM karmonI noMdha zI ? 154 chatAM nathI daMDayA 'huM-tuM'thI ! noMdha levAno AdhAra ! zaMkA karavA karatAM... abhiprAya ApavAno adhikAra (?)! 156 thApaNa mUkayA pachI zaMkA ?! noMdha tyAM pudgala sattA ja ! 157 dhIreluM yAda AvyuM ne ! noMdha : abhiprAya ! 157 niHzaMkatA, tyAM kArya siddhi ! jAgRtinI jarUra, noMdhanI nahIM ! e zaMkA koI nA kare ! noMdha, tyAM DaMkhIluM mana ! 159 samAdhAna jJAnI pAsethI ! 10ra 'jJAnI'nuM savAMga darzana ! to zaMkA TheTha sudhI rAkho ! 102 vItarAgatAnI vATe ... 3. komanasensa: velDIMga 'komanasensa'nI kyA ! 162 badhAM 'tALAM'nI cAvI 'eka' ! 'evarI hera eplIkebala' ! 16 saMsAramAM zIkho ATaluM ja ! 'komanasensa'nuM pramANa ! 164 phariyAda ? nahIM, "eDajasTa' ! vyavahArakatA vinAnA ! 165 'DAuna' sAthe 'levaliMga' ! 'DAuna' ahaMkAra, to 'DilIMga' 'besTa" ! 165 abhedatA Ama sadhAya ! 'milanasArathI vadhe 'komanasensa' ! 166 kAcA kAnanA nA thavAya ! sUra meLavatAM meLavatAM.... 167 'velDIMga', sUkSma saMdhANa ! e athaDAmaNa TALe ! 168 'veDIMga' karanArAne.... to rokAya svaccheda ! 168 'bhAvamAM pAchuM nA paDAya ! saraLatAthI vadhe 'komanasensa' ! 169 pahelethI ja sUjha, 'velDIMga'nI ! 'solyuzana' 'komanasensa'thI ! 170 'velIMga', eka kaLA ! ghATa, tyAM pUrNatA nahIM ! 'velDIMgathI sarvatra AnaMda ! enAthI sUjha judI ! 171 jJAnI'nI maulika vAto ! 'komanasensa' savAMgI !! 172 toDe badhA, sAMdhe viralo ! .....ane buddhi, sUjha, prajJA ! 176 4. mamatA : lAlaca kAdavathI cheTA sArA ! 189 viSayanI lAlaca, kevI hIna dazA ! 215 nirapekSa jIvana bhAvyA 'jJAnI'nAM ! enAthI ja athaDAmaNa ! 217 mamatA nAme ya nahIM ! 10 ne lAlacamAMthI lAcArImAM ! saMpUrNa nimamatva tyAM paramAtmapaNuM ! lAlacuno sparza bagADe saMskAra ! e ja lakSaNa mamatAnAM ! e ja puruSArtha ? mamatAno vistAra ! 192 lAlacu vahore jokhamo ja ! mamatA 'bAunDarI'pUrvakanI ! lAlacunI najara ja bhogamAM ! 45. vistArelI mamatA ! AnI lAlaca zI te ? rAkhavI mamatA paNa.... svachaMda, aTakaNa ne lAlaca ! miTAvo mamatA samajaNathI ! lAlacanI graMthi ! 223 'myujhiyama'nI zarato ! evo nizcaya choDAve lAlaco ! 223 sAyakolojikala IphekTa ja ! ahaMkAre karIne kaDhAya ! 224 mamatA vagereya badhuM prApta ! tyAre lAlaca jAya ! 225 lAlacanAM pariNAme phasAmaNa ! lAlaca khAtara to du:kha Ape ! 226 ava svabhAva, chatAM sUkSma avalokana ! 204 Avo durupayoga thato nathI ne ? 226 mAnyatA ja vaLagADe mamatA ! kusaMgano pAsa ! je mamatAvALo, te 'pote' hoya ! 205 enAM AvaraNa bhAre ! 228 DrAmeTika mamatA, DrAmA pUratI ! AjJApAlana ja aMtima upAya ! 228 bhogavaTo, paNa mamatA vagara ! pUjAvAnI lAlaca ! tene mokSa maLe ! eka bhava 'jJAnI'nI AdhInatAmAM ! 236 lAlacamAM, niyama paNa nahIM ! AdhInatA, paNa upara nahIM ! ra37 lAlaca to dhyeya cUkAve ! hetu, pUrvakAmano ghaTe ! 238 jokhamI, lobha ke lAlaca ? 210 zAzamAM nathI, sAMbhaLyAmAM nathI..239 jyAM tyAMthI sukhanI ja lAlaca ! 5. mAta: garva :gAvatA mAna, mamatA vagaranuM ! 241 dehAbhimAna, zUnyatAne pAmeluM ! 276 manamAM mAneluM mAna ! 242 svarUpajJAna pachI.. e badhuM ya mAna mATe ja ! svamAna eTale... krodhathI bhayaMkara uttApanA ! ajJAna dazAno zreSTha sadguNa ! 282 gamato ahaMkAra du:khadAyI banyo ! abhimAnI : mithyAbhimAnI ! khAnadAnIno ahaMkAra ! enuM nAma mithyAbhimAna ! 285 mAnanI bhUkha ! rAI bharI magajamAM !! mAnanA 'svAda'mAM lobha chUTe ! mAna mApavAnuM tharmomiTara ! mAna : mAnanI bhIkha ! nirmAnI : nirahaMkArI : nirmohI ! 289 mAna cAkho, paNa... sapuruSa e ja ke jene..... mAnamAM kapaTa : mAnanI vikRti ! ama. sRhI nathI ! apamAna karanAro, upakArI ! .... unmatattA nathI ! apamAnano premI ! .. potApaNuM nathI !! gaNataranI helpa ? garva mIThAzathI Ubho saMsAra ! pratikAra, tyAM pratikramaNa ! | 'vijJAna" ja choDAve garvarasa ! 213 170 189 294 294 297

Page #23
339 305 13 408 319 320 32 1 apamAnanI nirbaLatA ! 256 'jJAnI'ne garva nathI ! 298 AtmAne mAna-apamAna ? garvarasa caDhAve kepha ! jenuM apamAna, te "pote' nahoya ! 257 aham rAkhavo 'jANato nathI'no ! vaLagelI vaMzAvaLI kapAyanI ? garva, svaprazaMsA vakhate.... "jAgRti" ! 'karanArA'nI jagyA 'cenja' ! 'zAnI', gAravatAmAM nathI ! mAna, e hiMsaka bhAva ja ! 262 A paNU badhI gAravatA.. 310 mAnanA paryAyo aneka ! 262 gAravatAmAMthI chUTavuM kaI rIte ? 312 hama' naDe mokSe jatAM ! 267 mukti sAdhavI 'zAnI' Azreya !! 315 ahaMkAra, mAna, abhimAna....eka nathI ! 270 6. ladhutama : gurutama 'laghutama' 'gurutama' padamAM 'jJAnI' ! 317 dheya, laghutama padano ! bhAvamAM to laghutama ja ! u18 ladhutama bhAvanI khumArI ! 340 tyAre bhagavAna vaza varte ! 'sva'-bhAva pAmavo e ja gustama ! 342 'juniyara'nA ya 'juniyara' ! enI 'TesTa ekjhAminezana' ! 34ra laghutama bhaNatAM jaDavA bhagavAna ! 'phAunDezana' akrama vijJAnanA ! mahattva, ladhutama padanuM ja ! ladhutama ahaMkArathI mokSa tarapha ! 343 laghutA ja laI jAya, gurutA bhaNI ! 322 emAM 'resakorsa' je nahIM ! 344 lAcAra thavA karatAM...." doDe badhAM, InAma ekane !! 344 gurutama thavA gayA, to..... TIkA, potAnuM ja bagADe ! 345 laghutamane ja vare gurutama ! Ama ghoDadoDamAMthI chaTakAya ! 347 sAdhavo yoga laghutamano ! Ane AvaData kema kahevAya ? 348 jagadguru ? nahIM, jagatane guru ! tyAM thaI gayo ahaMkArazUnya ! gurukillI eTale ? jagata jItAya, hArIne ! 3pa1 laghutamathI 'ejhekTanesa' ! nahIM to pragati rUMdhAya ! 353 varlDano ziSya ja, varlDano uparI ! chUTavA mATe gajabanI zodhakhoLa ! 354 'jJAna' ApyuM ke meLavyuM ? ekamAM "e sparTa'. paNa badhe upapa oLakhavuM pada 'jJAnI'nuM ! 'resakorsa'nA saravaiye ! vartavuM "pote' laghutama bhAve ! 334 InAma 'pahelA'ne, hAMphavAnuM badhAne ! 360 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' ! 336 to "parsanAliTI' paDe ! 'rileTivamAM laghutama bhAva ! 337 jItADIne javA do ! pUrNa laghutama, tyAM pUrNatva ! 338 korsa, akrama vijJAnano ! 363 7. kheMca : kapaTaH poInTameta akrama vijJAna, ukele gUMco sarve ! 365 kapaTa, caturAI bAdhaka mokSamArgamAM ! 331 jIvana, kheMca vagaranuM ! 36pa 'poInTamena', mokSamArgamAM..! enI pakaDa nA hoya ! 368 | 'mAre' zuM ? .. 386 saraLa thaI ukela lAvavo ! 3% kAna daIne sAMbhaLavuM...?! bharelA mAlano pakSa nA laIe ! 371 'huM jANuM chuM', ApaghAtI kAraNa ! 394 8. jAgRti: pUjAvAtI kAmatA 'sAnI'nI samajaNe samajaNa ! 401 samakita thakI lAyaka bhaNI ! 410 pUrNAhuti karavI hoya, to 40ra tyAM khUba khUba cetIne cAlavuM ! 410 upazama, e bhArelo agni ja ! 403 bALaka banavuM, 'jJAnI'nA ! 411 pAta' para pakSapAta, svasattA AvAya ! 404 pUrNatA vinA pachADe 'upadeza' ! tyAre 'jAgRti' pariName 'jJAna'mAM ! 46 apUjyanA pUjAvAmAM patana ! jAgRti', tyAM kaSAyo 'jame' nahIM ! 4OF mokSamArganAM bhayasthAno ! 415 'sAyaka', pachI sephasAIDa ! guptaveze cAlI javuM ! 417 mIThuM lAgyuM, tyAM paDe mAra ! 408 'jJAnI' saMgAthe pAMsarA cAlIe ! 418 *vizeSatA', tyAM viSe ! Yol aho, kAruNya 'zAnI' taNuM ! 419 9. potApaNuM : paramAtmA abhedatA, AkhA vizva saMge ! 422 'DiscArja' ahaMkArI e potApaNuM ! 441 ApApaNuM soMpI dIdhuM ! 423 pramANa jAgRti'nuM, 'DiscArja potApaNuM !441 *jJAnI'ne potApaNuM nathI ! yathArtha jAgRti judApaNAnI ! 443 *jJAnI' asahaja nathI ! anubhava pramANe, ogALe potApaNuM ! 446 pachI ja DrAmeTika kahevAya ! A badhuM potApaNuM ! chatAM rahyuM potApaNuM ! 427 rahyo A ja puruSArtha ! 43 sattA gaI, potApaNuM rahyuM ! 429 tyAM baLa prajJAtaNuM ! huM, vakIla, maMgaLadAsa ! 430 ema enubhava vadhato jAya ! 448 rakSaNa, te lakSaNa potApaNAnA ! 431 samajavI jJAnabhASAnI jhINI vAto ! 49 tyAM gADha potApaNuM ! 432 'akrama vijJAna'nI labdhi ! 451 jonArAne nathI potApaNuM ! 434 adhInatA vinA mokSamArga nathI ! 45ra 'TesTa' potApaNAno ! jJAnIdazAnuM pramANa ! 453 tyAre jaze potApaNuM ! 43pa 'vijJAna'mAM vAta ja samajavI rahI ! 453 choDavo zokha potApaNAno ja ! 437 oLakhanAro ja pAme ! "bhAva" thakI Adaravo puruSArtha ! 438 ApopuM gayuM. thayo paramAtmA ! 455 udaya'mAM vartatuM potApaNuM ! 426 46 3pa0 48 330 434 40 47

Page #24
dAdA bhagavAna' kathita tatvajJAna tathA vyavahArajJAta saMbaMdhI graMtho 8) vartamAna tIrthaMkara zrI sImaMdhara svAmI : brahmAMDanA bhUgoLanuM jJAnI puruSanI dIvyadraSTie avalokana, vartamAna tIrthaMkara zrI sImaMdhara svAmI ke je hAlamAM che bIjI pRthvI para, mahAvideha kSetramAM sadehe vicarI rahyA che, temanI saMpUrNa mAhitI, parama pUjaya dAdA bhagavAnanA DAyarekTa anusaMdhAna dvArA je maLI che tenuM varNana. (pRSTha - 118) 1) dAdA bhagavAnanuM AtmavijJAna : 'koNa chuM'nI oLakha mATe, AtmajJAna prApti mATenI tamAma pAyAnI taiyArIo karAvatI vANInuM saMkalana. (pRSTha - 66) 2) pratikramaNa : jIvanamAM Dagale ne pagale thatAM doSomAMthI mukta thavAnuM ane AtmajJAnanA mArge pragati karavA sAdI, saraLa, sacoTa ne TUMkamAM ApeluM mArgadarzana. (pRSTha - 488) saMkSipta H (pRSTha-72) 3) tIjadoSa darzanathI... nirdoSa : 'pArakAMnA doSo jovAthI karma baMdhana ne potAnAM ja doSo jovAthI mukti.' A siddhAMta para potAnAM sthULatamathI mAMDIne sUkSmatama doSo kevAM hoya che, tenI suMdara chaNAvaTa atre agopita thAya che. (pRSTha - 128) 4) paisAto vyavahAra : agiyAramAM prANanuM sthAna pAmelA paisAe kyAM ne kone kera vartAvyo nathI ? paisA pAchaLanI hAyavarALane hImanI jema ThArI nAkhatI vANI. (pRSTha - 418) saMkSipta H (pRSTha - 74) 5) pati-patnIno vyavahAra: kaLiyugamAM pati-patnInI khITapITono anubhava paraNelAMone kaMI pUchavAno hoya ? enuM samAdhAna pAmI satyuganAM rAma-sItA jevuM jIvana jIvatAM anekone karI detI vANI. (pRSTha - 514) saMkSipta : (pRSTha - 112) 7) mA-bApa chokarAMto vyavahAra : pazcimanI havA, TI.vI., muvInI gaherI asarothI vikRtine pAmelAM AjanAM bALako ane pAchalI saMskRtinAM mA-bApa vaccenuM aMtara ane temAMthI thatAM gharSaNomAMthI AbAda mukta thaI Adarza vyavahAra karatAM mUkI detI vANI. (pRSTha - 576) saMkSipta H (pRSTha - 90) E) "Who Am I?" : "Who am I?" is a burning question since the begining of ar being in the universe ! Answer to it is here... (Page-128) 10) AptavANI zreNI - 1 thI 11 : AtmajJAna prAptinI bhUmikA taiyAra karAvIne TheTha kevaLajJAnanI zreNIo caDhAvatI tattvajJAnanI vANInuM caDhatA krame raju karatAM graMtho..... guhya jJAnane sAdI, saraLa ne taLapadI bhASAmAM praznotarI rUpe raju thAya che, je sAdhakonAM potAnAM ja prazno vAMcatA vAMcatA ukelAtA jAya che ne mokSamArganI zreNIo caDhAvatAM jAya che. mokSamArganA sAdhakone khUba ja saraLa ane saheluM thaI paDe tevI gAIDa.. 11) mRtyu samaye, pahelAM ane pachI : mRtyu pahelAM, mRtyu samaye ne pachI AtmAnI zI sthiti, te mATenI zI jAgRti potAnI ne sagAMvahAlAMnI, temaja zrAddha-saravaNI vagerenI satyatAne khullI karatI gUDha vANI. (pRSTha - 184) 12) vANIto siddhAMta : 'vANI koNa bole che ? kaI rIte utpanna thAya che ?" teno vaijJAnika siddhAMta ke je kyAMya pragaTa thayo nathI, te A pustakamAM khullo thayo che. kaThora, kaDavI, mIThI vANInA svarUpo ane madhurI vANInI prApti Adi tamAma rahasyo A pustakamAM aMti thayA che. (pRSTha - 555) saMkSipta : (pRSTha - 84) vANI vyavahAramAM : saMkSipta : (pRSTha - 84)

Page #25
13) samajathI prApta brahmacarya : jayAM viSaya-vikAranA sukhamAM loka gaLADUba racyA rahe che tevA kALamAM viSayanA doSo-jokhamonuM bhAna karAvatI ane saMpUrNa brahmacaryamAM rahevA mATenA mArgadarzananI suMdara samajaNa pADatI vANI. (pRSTha - 652) saMkSipta H (pRSTha - 94) 14) karmanuM vijJAna : 'karma' zabdanuM vaijJAnika eksaplenezana zuM che ? karmabaMdhana zuM che ? ne karmothI mukti kaI rIte thaI zake ? karmono bhogavaTo kone che ? vi. aneka praznonA uttara ApatI draSTAMto sAthenI sAdI-saraLa taLapadI bhASAmAM samajaNa pADatI vANI. (pRSTha - 84) 15) bhogave enI bhUla : gharamAM, dhaMdhAmAM kaMI paNa bhogavavAnuM Ave che, nukasAna thAya che tyAre bhUla konI ? mArI zI bhUla ? evA prazno UbhAM thAya tyAre samAdhAna thAya evI samaja prApta karAvatI vANI. (pRSTha - 32) 16) banyuM te ja nyAya : ApaNI joDe zA mATe anyAya thAya che ? nirdoSa jela bhogave, anItivALA baMgalA bAMdhe e zA mATe ? evAM jagatamAM chUTavA mATe adbhUta cAvIsama vANI ! (pRSTha - 32) 17) eDajasTa evarIvhera jIvanamAM prasaMge prasaMge sAmAne eDajasTa nahIM thaIe to jIvana pote ja problema banI jAya. tyAM pati-patnIchokarAM vacce, bosa ke nokara joDe, eDajasTa evarIvhera thavAnuM sonerI sUtra A pustakamAM sAMpaDe che. (pRSTha - 32) 18) athaDAmaNa TALo: matabheda kyAM nahIM paDatAM hoya ? temAM upAya zo ? athaDAmaNa TALavAnuM ane niphlezamaya jIvana jIvavAnI kaLA ane TheTha mokSa sudhInI cAvI pustakamAMthI prApta thAya che. (pRSTha - 32) 'dAdA bhagavAna' koNa? jUna ogaNIsaso aThThIvananI e samI sAMjano chaeka vAgyAno samaya, bhIDamAM dhamadhamatuM suratanuM sTezana, pleTaphorma naM. 3 paranAM relavenAM bAMkaDA para beThelA aMbAlAla mULajIbhAI paTela rUpI maMdiramAM kudaratI krame akrama svarUpe kaMIka janmothI vyakta thavA mathatA 'dAdA bhagavAna" saMpUrNapaNe pragaTa thayA che ane kudarate saryuM adhyAtmanuM addabhUta Azcarya ! eka kalAkamAM vizvadarzana lAdhyuM ! 'ApaNe koNa ? bhagavAna koNa ? jagata koNa calAve che ? karma zuM? mukti zuM ? 'I. jagatanAM tamAma AdhyAtmika praznonAM saMpUrNa phoDa paDyA ! Ama kudarate, jagatane caraNe eka ajoDa pUrNa darzana thayuM ane tenuM mAdhyama banyA zrI aMbAlAla mULajIbhAI paTela, carotaranAM bhAdaraNa gAmanAM pATIdAra, kaMTrAkTano dhaMdho karanAra, chatAM pUrNa vItarAga purUSa ! emane prApti thaI te ja rIte mAtra be ja kalAkamAM, anyane paNa prApti karAvI ApatAM, emanA adbhUta sidhdha thayelA jJAna prayogathI ! ene akrama mArga kahyo. akrama eTale kama vinAno ane kama eTale pagathiye pagathiye, krame krame UMce caDhavAno ! akema eTale liphaTa mArga ! zorTakaTa ! teozrI svayaM pratyekane 'dAdA bhagavAna koNa ?' no phoDa pADatA kahetAM ke, "A dekhAya che te 'dAdA bhagavAna' hoya. dAdA bhagavAna to caudalokanA nAtha che, e tamArAmAM ya che, badhAmAM ya che. tamArAmAM avyaktarUpe rahelA che ne 'ahIM saMpUrNapaNe vyakta thayelA che ! huM pote bhagavAna nathI. mArI aMdara pragaTa thayelA dAdA bhagavAnane huM paNa namaskAra karuM chuM." 'vepAramAM dharma ghaTe, dharmamAM vepAra na ghaTe" e siddhAMtathI teo AkhuM jIvana jIvI gayAM. jIvanamAM kyAreya emaNe koInI pAsethI paiso lIdho nathI. urdu dhaMdhAnI vadhArAnI kamANIthI bhaktone jAtrA karAvatA ! parama pUjya dAdAzrI gAmegAma-dezavideza paribhramaNa karIne mumukSu jIvone satsaMga tathA svapajJAnanI prApti karAvatAM hatAM. teozrIe potAnI hayAtImAM ja pU. DaoN. nIrubahena amInane svarUpajJAna prApti karAvavAnI jJAnasiddhi Apela. teozrI dehavilaya bAda Aje paNa pU. DaoN. nIrubena amIna gAmegAma dezavideza pharIne mumukSu jIvone satsaMga tathA svapajJAnanI prApti nimitta bhAve karAvI rahyA che, jeno lAbha hajAro mokSArthI laIne dhanyatA anubhave che. - jaya saccidAnaMda.

Page #26
dAdA sazuve namonamaH AptavANI zreNI - 9 [1] ADAI : risAvuM : trAgavuM samajavA jevI vAta "jJAtI'tI ! 'jJAnI puruSa'nI vAta daraasala sIdhI che. mokSa paNa sIdho che. mokSamAM badhAne pesavA de che. kaMI nA pesavA de evuM che nahIM. paNa mokSane mATe lAyaka hovo joIe. tyAM to mokSamAM vAMkAcuMkA cAle to paisAya evuM nathI. enA karatAM pahelethI pAMsarA thaI jaIe e zuM khoTuM ?! mokSa agharo nathI, paNa 'jJAnI puruSa'nI vAta samajAI to kAmanuM che. nA samajAI to gUMco paDaze. kAraNa ke 'jJAnI puruSa'nI trikALa siddha vAta kahevAya. e eka phero bolyA hoya ne, te tIrthaMkaro ya e ja kahetA hoya. ApaNe jJAnI puruSa'nA kahyA pramANe cAlavuM; kAraNa ke 'jJAnI puruSa' kone kahevAya ? je badhI rIte pAMsarA thaI gayelA hoya ! te gALo levAmAM ya pAMsarA ne gALo ApavAmAM ya pAMsarA. paNa gALo ApatI vakhate to gALo Ape nahIM. kAraNa ke pAMsarA thayelA hoya eTale Ape ja nahIM ne ! ame to pahelethI ja pAMsarA thaI gayelA chIe. ne tamAre ya ADAI to kADhavI ja paDaze ne ? badhI ADAI kyAM sudhI cAlaze te ?! e to mahIMthI koIka phero nIkaLe tyAre ADAInI khabara paDe. nahIM to jJAnI puruSa'nI pAse Ave tyAre khabara paDe ke "ohoho, haju ATalI ADAI bharAI che ?!" AptavANI-9 pAMsarA to thavuM paDaze ne ? praznakartA : ADAIo kema jatI nathI ? dAdAzrI : zI rIte jAya te ? ghaNA dahADAno mukAma karelo. ane pAchuM bhADAno kAyado, peThA pachI khase nahIM. ahIM rahevA AvelI e ADAI khase ke pachI ? meM eka jaNane kahyuM, 'ATalI badhI ADAI zuM karavA karo cho ? thoDI ADAI ochI karo ne ?" tyAre e kahe che, "duniyAmAM ADAI vagara to cAle nahIM." tyAre meM kahyuM, 'A sApaneya daramAM pesatI vakhate sIdhuM thavuM paDe. jo mokSe javuM hoya to pAMsarA thAva ne ! nahIM to loka pAMsarA karaze, tyAra pachI mokSe javAze. enA karatAM jAte ja pAMsarA thaI jAva ne !' loka to mArI mArIne pAMsarA kare, enA karatAM jAte pAMsarA thaI jaIe, e zuM khoTuM ? mATe jAte ja pAMsarA thaI jAva. loka mArI mArIne pAMsarA kare ke nA kare ? praznakartA : kare. paNa to ya loko pAMsarA thatAM nathI ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa jyAre tyAre to pAMsarA thayA vagara chUTako ja nathI ne ! kaDavo anubhava thAya ne, pachI ADAI enI meLe ja chUTI jAya. A to ADAIo pAra vagaranI che. koI avatAramAM koI pAMsaro karanAra maLyo nathI. ane jo maLyo hota to Ama bhaTakata nahIM. eTale badhuM thAya, paNa pAMsaro nA rahe. te A jagata zuM kare che ? mArI mArIne pAMsaro ja kare che. haju pAMsaro nathI thato ?! to mAro ene ! te pachI baI mAre, chokarAM mAre, badhA loka mAre, ne ene pAMsaro kara kara karyA kare. mane to keTalAMya avatArathI lokoe mArI mArIne pAMsaro karI nAkhyo, tyAre huM DAhyo Damaro thaI gayo. jyAre huM pAMsaro thayo tyAre juo, mAre 'A' jJAna maLI gayuM ne ! Ama to huM ya pAMsaro nahoto. eTale A jagata AkhuM ya pAMsaro kare che. je pAMsarA nA thayA hoya tene ya pAMsarA thavuM ja paDaze ne, jyAre tyAre ?! tyAre A to dhoLA AvyA pachI ya ADo thAya have ! A jevI tevI vaMzAvaLI nathI ane pAcho gharamAM ja ADo thAya.

Page #27
AptavANI-9 gharamAM bAbo marI jAya, pachI A to raDAroLa kare ke mArA bAbAno bAbo, ekano eka bAbo hato ! jANe e pote maravAno nA hoya ne, evuM e ya raDe. pote maravAno nahIM hoya ?! dAdo thayo to ya ? paNa to ya bAbAnA bAbAnuM raDe. alyA, javAnuM thayuM to pAMsaro rahe ne ! dAdo thAya tene javAnuM nA thayeluM hoya ? signala to paDI gayuM hoya. dAdo thayo tyAMthI signala paDyuM. to ya jANe potAnI gADI nA UpaDavAnI hoya evI vAta kare. te A signala paDI gayuM che, mATe ceto jarA have. praznakartA : gADI upaDavAnI nizAnIo AvI gaI che. dAdAzrI : hA, signala paDI gayo che. have nirAMte gADInI UpaDavAnI taiyArI che. have pAMsaruM thavAnI jarUra che. ADAI kabUlya ADAIonI hAra ! e ADAI zuM haze ? tame ghaNAM ya vakhata lokonI pAse bolo cho ke, "are bhaI, ADAI kema karo cho tame ?" agara to tamane koI kahe ke, 'ADAI kema karo cho ?" oLakho to kharAM ke nA oLakho ADAIne ? praznakartA ADAI to oLakhAya ne ! dAdAzrI : keTalAM varSathI oLakho? praznakartA : jyArathI samaja AvI tyArathI. dAdAzrI : eTale ADAIno 'sToka rahevA dIdho hato ke vecI dIdho? rahevA dIdho ? tame to 'hA' kaho cho. 'nA' kahetA hoya to atyAre ADAI nIkaLI jAya ne ? praznakartA : 'hA' kahevAthI nIkaLI jAya. dAdAzrI : ema ?! "nA" kahevAthI nA nIkaLI jAya ? praznakartA nahIM. 'nA' kahevAthI to ADAI vadhAre majabUta thAya. dAdAzrI : tyAre loka kahe che ne, 'nA' kahevI ? ke nA, mArAmAM koI ADAI nathI. AptavANI-9 ADAI, komata : akomata ! kone ADAIno anubhava nA hoya ? jeTalI buddhi vadhAre eTalI ADAI vadhAre. samajadAra mANaso ADAI ochI kare. ane jADI khAlanA mANaso bahu ADAI kare, e ADAIne choDe nahIM. have e ADAIne zuM kahevAya ? lokonI ADAI ne enI ADAImAM phera zuM ? "voTa ijha dhI Dipharansa biTavIna komana enDa anUkomana' ADAI ? "ankomana' ADAI eTale gADha ADAI hoya. e ADAI pachI chuTe nahIM. jema A gADha samakita chUTatuM nathI, tema A gADha mithyAtva chUTe nahIM. pachI game eTaluM ene samajAvIe to ya e emanuM sthAna choDe nahIM. tame lAvI lAvIne kinAre lAvo to ya paNa mULa sthAna choDe nahIM. evuM 'ankomana' ADAI paNa enuM sthAna choDe nahIM. ADAIo, strI-puruSamAM ! ADAI tamArAmAM thoDIghaNI kharI ke nahIM ? thoDI kharI ? to Amane kaho ne, ke kADhI Ape. jarA godA mAre ke ADAI nIkaLe ! praznakartA : eTale godA mAre tyAre ja ADAI nIkaLe ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM ? e godA mAratA nathI koI dahADo ? bAkI A to naryo ADAIno ja mAla bharelo che. ADAI nA hoya ene saraLa kahevAya, vALyo vaLe tema. praznakartA : puruSo pote kaMI evuM kabUla kare ke ame ADA chIe ? e to enI bairI ja kahe tyAre khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : e to strIo ya bahu ADI hoya che. A kaMI ekalAM puruSonI ja vAta karatA nathI. A to banneva AvAM hoya tyAre ja chokarAM AvAM thAya che ne ! ane strIone ADI karanArA A puruSo. e ADI nathI hotI, mULa janmajAta ADI nathI hotI. A puruSa to janmatAM ja ADo hoya che. e to mAtAne mahIM Ama Ama kUNIo mAre. puruSa jAti to mAne Ama kUNIo mAre. mAthI saheja maracuM vadhAre khavAyuM hoya

Page #28
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 to mahIM kUNIo mAre. ane strI, e janmajAta evI ADI nathI. jovAtuM. pote potAnuM ! A to lokonI ADAInuM kahe kahe kare. jANe emaNe potAnI evI ADAI kADhI nAkhI che (!) eTalA hAruM lokone kahe che. 'A ADo che" evuM nA kahevuM joIe. praznakartA : dAdA, sAmo mANasa ADo dekhAya e paNa potAnI ja ADAI ne ? dAdAzrI : e moTAmAM moTI ADAI ne ! praznakartA : eTale ADAIo badhI potAnI ja jovAnI che ? dAdAzrI : to bIjA konI ? bIjAne kahevA jAva to e sAmo thaI jAya. praznakartA : ADAIonI paNa keTalIka vakhata amane khabara nathI paDatI. e amane sIdhaIo lAge. dAdAzrI : e khabara nA paDe. e to mahIM UMDA UtaravuM paDe. ADAIo jovA mATe niSpakSapAtI valaNa levuM paDe. koI ApaNane kahe ke, "ADAI zuM karavA karo cho ?" tyAre ApaNe kahIe, 'juo ne, mUrakho che ne ! huM ADAI karuM chuM ke e kare che ?" sAmo UlaTo ApaNane tapAsa karavAnuM kahe, to mahIM tapAsa karo. A to ApaNe ApaNI ADAIonI tapAsa nathI karatA, paNa tenI ADAIonI ApaNe tapAsa karIe chIe. kema mane nathI kahetA ke ADAIo tame kema karo cho ?! have mArAmAM ADAIo dekhe, to e kahyA vagara rahe nahIM. jagata to jevuM dekhe evuM kahe. ADAI chUTI jatAM.... A loka to kaheze, 'tArI banAvelI cA nahIM pIuM." ohoho, tyAre konI banAvelI cA pIza have ? eTale e dhaNI che te dabaDAve pelIne. zuM kaheze ? 'teM cA bagADI ne, eTale have pharI tArA hAthanI cA nahIM pIuM." dabaDAve bicArIne, ADo thAya. keTalI badhI ADAIo ! tenAM duHkha paDe che ne ! eTale ADAI ja naDe che. moha to kazuMya nA naDe. e to be vakhata moha rahe pAcho, ne trIjI vakhata mahIM kaMTALo Ave. sarasa jamavAnuM hoya, paNa moTuM caDhAvIne jamADe to ? nA game, nahIM ? "baLyuM tAruM jamavAnuM' ema kahe ne ?! are, hIrA paNa moTuM caDhAvIne Ape to nA game. A sAhebanuM moDhuM caDheluM hoya ne hIrA ApI jAya to tame zuM kaho ? 'lo tamAro hIro tamAre ghera laI jAva." Ama kahe ke nahIM ? to hIrAnI kiMmata vadhAre che ke moDhuM caDhyAnI ?! ApaNA loko hIrA nA le. jyAre phorenamAM to viliyamanuM moTuM caDyuM hoya to ya leDI khAI le. ane ApaNe tyAM to AvI bane. chatAM A strIo nA kare. A to Arya saMskArI strIo ! phorenamAM cAlyuM jAya. phorenamAM to moDhuM caDhAvIne A hIrA Ape ne, to kahe, 'cho ne, mUo bUmAbUma kare. ApaNe to hIrA AvI gayA ne !' ane ahIM A nA cAle. A to Arya sannArI kahevAya. tamane kema lAge che ?' praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : eTale ApaNe gharamAM moTuM nA caDhAvIe to hIrA karatAM vadhAre che ne ?! nAno bAbo hau rUpiyA aDavA nA de. kaheze, "A to mArA rUpiyA, lAvo joIe.' eka bAbatamAM saraLa hoya tyAre bIje ADAI hoya. e ADAI nA nIkaLe tyAM sudhI chUTAya nahIM. ADAI jAya to bhagavAna thAya evuM pada che, A jagyA che evI. 'dAdA' ADAIthI zUnya thaI gayelA che ! darekanI ADAI judI judI rItanI hoya. tame jene ADAI kahetA ho e tamArI ADAI tamane nA dekhAya. tamArI ADAI tamane dekhAya

Page #29
AptavANI-9 7 to to tame bhagavAna thaI jAva. potAnI ADAI potAne dekhAya e bhagavAna thAya. haju tamArI ADAI tamane kyAM dekhAya che ? nahIM to tame bhagavAna thaI jAva. taDe mAtra ADAIo ! mATe sIdhA thavAnI jarUra che. jo huM sIdho thaI gayo chuM, to che bhAMjagaDa kazI ? keTalAya avatArano mAra khA khA karIne A sIdho thaI gayo chuM. kazuM ADAI ja nathI ne, have. tame kaho ke 'nIce heMDo' to nIce heMDIe. amAre ADAI nAma nA hoya. to ya koI kaheze, 'tame AvAM cho, tevAM cho.' paNa e to evo 'je' che tene e kahe che. huM pelAne khoTo ya nahIM kahuM ke tuM khoTo che. ane e kone kahe che te ya huM samajI jaIza. e mane kaheto nathI, paNa mArA 'pADozI'ne kahe che. praznakartA H tamArA pADozI koNa ? dAdAzrI : A 'e. ema. paTela' ijha dhI pharsTa nebara. 'hI ijha konTrAkTara olso, inkamaTekSa peyara olso'! ene e kahe che. loka kaheze, 'saMsAramAM jJAna thAya nahIM.' are, 'inkamaTekSa peyara' che ane 'konTrAkTa'no nAgo dhaMdho kare, to ya 'jJAna' thayuM ! e juo to kharAM ! mATe A saMsAramAM zuM naDe che ? tArI ADAI ja naDe che ane meM to mArAmAM bahu ADAIo dekhI hatI. ane e ADAIo badhI khalAsa thaI to huM 'jJAnI' thaI gayo. mahIM ADAI nA rahe to jANavuM ke jJAnI thaI gayA. ADAItuM svarUpa ! praznakartA : ADAInuM svarUpa zuM samajavuM ? dAdAzrI : dila Thare evI vAta hoya to ya svIkAra nA kare, potAnAM mate ja cAle. ame koIne kazuMya kahIe nahIM, dabANa nA karIe. chatAM koIne kazuM kahIe ane jo kadI e nA mAne to ene ADAI ja kahevAya ne ? potAnA mate ja cAlavuM che ne ? ke 'jJAnI'nI AjJAthI cAlavAnuM ? AptavANI-9 praznakartA : kharekhara 'jJAnI'nI AjJAthI ja cAlavAnuM che. dAdAzrI : badhI ADAI ja hoya. badhe jyAM ho tyAM ADAIthI ja badhuM UbhuM rahyuM che ne ! phakta amArAmAM ADAI nA hoya. ame ADAI zUnya thaI gayelA chIe. koI dabANa kare ke, 'tamAre phalANuM kAma karavuM ja paDaze. nahIM to ame badhAM upavAsa karIzuM.' du:khamAM paDatAM hoya to ame kahIe ke, 'le bhaI, karIe. paNa upavAsa nA karazo.' praznakartA : e ADAI nA kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. ADAI A kahevAya ke 'ame upavAsa karIzuM.' ahIM jagata AkhuM aTakyuM che. praznakartA : ane jyAre Apa kaho to e vakhate tevuM nA karavuM, ene ADAI kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : ADAI ja kahevAya ne ! tyAre bIjuM zuM ? kaMI 'dAdAjI' evuM kahe kharAM ke Ama karI lAva ?! kaMI ApaNA hitanuM hoya to ja kahe ne ?! mATe tyAM ADuM nA thavuM. samajaNathI saraLatA ! tame ADAI joyelI ke koInAmAM ? e ADAI mANasomAM hoya che evuM joyeluM ? praznakartA : mArA potAnAmAM ja hatI ne, dAdA. bhayaMkara ADo hato huM. dAdAzrI : ema ?! je ADo hato, tene ya 'pote' jANe ! kAraNa ke jANanAra judo ne ?! ke ADo thanAra te ja jANanAra haze ? nA, ADo thanAra te hoya jANanAra. AmAM jANanAra judo che, jANanAra 'pote' che. pachI ADAI badhI tamArI jatI rahI, nahIM ? praznakartA : haju che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : to pAMsaruM thavuM paDaze. ADAI to nA cAle. ane jo ApaNA A 'jJAna'thI pAMsarA nahIM thAva, to loka mArI-ThokIne pAMsarA

Page #30
AptavANI-9 karaze. enA karatAM samajaNathI ja pAMsarA thaI jaIe ApaNe. eTale bhAMjagaDa maTI gaI ne ! haMmezAM ya DakhoDakhala kare ne, eTale dhaDa karIne vAge. eTale e ene pAMsaro ja karatI jAya. DakhoDakhala ja pAMsarA kare che. e ADAInAM zIMgaDAM badhAM ahIM tuTI jAya to rAge paDI jAya ! e badhI ADAIo pAzavatA jevI hoya. sArA be mANasa kahe ke, "alyA bhAI. amArI vAta mAnane ' tyAre e zuM kaheze ? 'nA, e mArA mAnyAmAM nathI AvatuM.' e enI ADAI ApaNI sAme ughADI pADI. e ADAI jaze tyAre mokSa thaze. mokSamArganI vATakharco !. A amane koI kahe, 'dAdA, A badhAMne page lAgo.' to badhAne pAMca pAMca vakhata page lAgI AvuM. ame to vAgharIne ya page lAgIe. je rIte page lAgavuM hoya ne, te rIta amArI pAse hoya. eka AtmAne page lAgavuM ane pelA vAgharIne ya page lAgavuM, banne rIta amArI pAse hoya. e kaheze, 'AtmAne page nA lAgazo, vAgharIne page lAgo.' to vAgharIne hau page lAgIe. eTale namratA hovI joIe. tadana namra, evo ogaLI gayo pANImAM tenuM kalyANa thaze. ane jyAM sudhI mahIM gAMgaDuM haze tyAM sudhI ogaLyo nathI, tyAM sudhI cakkara pharyA karaze. jema 'moTA mANasa'nI sthApanA thaI tema namra vadhAre hoya, akaDAI nA hoya. akaDAI to halakA mANasanAmAM hoya. A "jJAna" maLyA pachI akaDAI kone hoya ? halakA mANasane ! nahIM to akaDAI hotI haze ?! pachI, sAcI vAta hoya to tarata mAnI jAya, ene saraLa kahevAya. praznakartA : paNa e to koI kahe ane ApaNe mAnIe ne, emAM ghaNI vakhata ApaNane gothAM khAvAno ya vakhata Ave. dAdAzrI : gothAM khAvA sArAM. evuM che ne, eka saMte kahyuM ke, " mANasa jAtano vizvAsu chuM." tyAre koI kahe, 'koI tamane chetarI jaze to ?" tyAre e kahe, 'eka chetaraze, be chetaraze, paNa koIka dahADo evo AptavANI-9 mANasa mane maLI Avaze ke mAruM kAma thaI jaze.' eTale e zuM kahe che? chetarAtAM chetarAtAM kAma sAruM thaze. ane je chetarAvA nA rahyA che to bhaTakI bhaTakIne marI jaze, to ya ThekANuM nahIM paDe. kAraNa ke vizvAsa ja nA bese ne ! zaMkAzIla thayA, eno kyAre pAra Ave ? tamane samajAya che A 'thIarI' ? saraLatA eTale bIjA kahe ke tarata mAnI le, bhale chetarAvAnuM thAya. eka chetaraze, be chetaraze, pAMca chetaraze, paNa sAco mANasa pachI tyAM maLaze ene ! nahIM to sAco maLe ja nahIM ne ?! "sIsTama" sArI che ne ? chetarAya, e to ApaNA prArabdhamAM lakhyuM haze to chetaraze. nahIM to chetaraze zI rIte ? eTale chetarAtAM chetarAtAM AgaLa jazo to peluM sAcuM maLI Avaze. te saraLa konuM nAma kahevAya ? ke 'A gADI ahIMthI amadAvAda jAya che' kahyuM eTale e besI jAya. enuM nAma saraLa. ane pelo kaheze ke "enI zI khAtarI ? ApaNe bIje tapAsa karIe to ?" tyAra pahelAM gADI UpaDI jAya. gADI UpaDI jAya ke nA UpaDI jAya ? AvI to keTalIye gADIo UpaDI gayelI ane bhaI tyAM ne tyAM ! saraLa eTale zuM ? khetaramAMthI bhIMDA lAvyA ane tarata vaghAra mUkIne mUkyA ke tarata daza miniTamAM varako vaLI jAya. ane asaraLa eTale zuM ke phrIjhamAM mUkelA bhIMDA ! phrIjhamAM be dahADA bhIMDA mUkIe to zuM thAya ? pachI e asaraLa bhIMDA kahevAya ! eTale bhagavAne zuM kahyuM ? saraLanuM kAma thaze. saraLano mokSa che. asaraLanuM tyAM AgaLa kAma cAle nahIM. praznakartA : A to ema lAge che ke koIpaNa jagyAe jaIe tyAM badhuM haze, paNa saraLatAno abhAva hoya che. dAdAzrI : hoya ja nahIM saraLatA ! ATalI vastu kayAMya dekhAya nahIM, sahaja kSamA. tame ene kazuM kahI Avo to e noMdha rAkhyA vagara rahe nahIM. e noMdhamAM rAkhI mUke, cha mahinA sudhI bhUle nahIM. noMdha nA rAkhe, enuM nAma sahaja kSamA kahevAya. pachI bIjuM zuM hoya ? kaThoratA hoya. dareka jAtanI kaThoratA hoya. pachI Agraha badhI jAtanA hoya. ane

Page #31
12 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 11 pachI saraLatA emanAmAM nA hoya, eTale tame vALo to e vaLe nahIM. namratA to hoya nahIM, paNa saraLatA ya hoya nahIM. 'Topa" paranI saraLatA joIe. pachI 'Topa paranI namratA joIe. namra eTale zuM ? ke sAmo vaita name tyAra pahelAM e Akho ya namI jAya. koI akaDAI kare tenI joDe ya pelo name. bAkI, manuSyano svabhAva kevo ? sAmo akaDAI karato hoya, to e akaDAI kare, paNa tyAM ya name to e mokSe javAnI nizAnI kahevAya. pachI nirlobhatA hoya. lobhe ja pakaDI rAkhelAne, lokone ! tethI bhagavAne kaheluM ke jAtrAe jaI Avajo, Ama karI Avajo ne paisA vAparI nAkhajo. eTale rUpiyA vaparAya to pelI lobhanI gAMTha ochI thaI jAya. nahIM to navvANuMnA dhakkAnI peTha lobha vadhato jAya. eTale A duniyAmAM koI cIjanI jarUriyAta nathI evo bhAva rahevo joIe. eTale A badhA guNo AvavA joIe. pelA badhAM bhUtAM nIkaLI jaze ane saraLa thaI jazo tyAre mokSa thaze. tAtapaNanI ADAIo ! amArA vakhatamAM kahetA hatAM ke ; "duniyA divAnI kahevAze re, bhUMDI bhIMtomAM bhaTakAze. pApe ya enuM jayAre pragaTa thAze, tyAre bhUvA-jati ghera jAze." pApa jyAre enuM pragaTa thaze, tyAre bhUvA-jatione tyAM jaIne dorA-dhAgA karAve ne phalANuM karAve. eTale pApa enuM pragaTa thAya pachI e bhUvA khoLe, jati khoLe. evuM koI kavie gAyuM che. praznakartA : dAdA, A pada kyAre vAMceluM tame ? dAdAzrI : A to paMcAvana varSanI vAta. e bahu jUnI nathI. bepAMca hajAra varSanI vAta nathI. praznakartA : paNa tamane yAda badhuM kemanuM rahe che ? dAdAzrI : amane kazuM yAda nA hoya. A somavAra che ke maMgaLavAra che te ja mane yAda nA Ave ne ! praznakartA : to A badhuM kyAMthI nIkaLyuM, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : A to amane dekhAya Ama ! Ama pharyA ke tarata peluM dekhAya, eTale ame bolIe. mAphaka Ave evI cIja dekhAya, te bolI nAkhIe. ame AvuM kyAM yAda rAkhIe ? amane TheTha sudhInuM, nAnapaNamAM hato tyAM sudhInuM badhuM dekhAyA ja kare. badhA paryAya dekhAya. AvuM hatuM..... AvuM hatuM, pachI AvuM hatuM, skUlamAM ame ghaMTa vAgyA pachI jatA hatA, e badhuM ya amane dekhAya. sAheba ciDhAyA kare. kahevAya nahIM ne ciDhAyA kare. praznakartA : Apa ghaMTa vAgyA pachI kema jatA hatA ? dAdAzrI : evo ropha ! manamAM evI khumArI. paNa e pAMsarA nA thayA tyAre ja A dazAne ! pAMsaro mANasa to ghaMTa vAgatA pahelAM jaIne besI jAya. praznakartA : ropha mAre e avaLo rasto kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : A to avaLo ja rasto ne ! ghaMTa vAgyA pachI bhAI Ave, sAheba pahelAM AvyA hoya ! ane sAheba moDA Ave to cAle, paNa chokarAM to ghaMTa vAgyA pahelAM niyamathI Ave ne ?! paNa A ADAI. 'zuM sAheba enA manamAM samaje che ?" kaheze. le !! alyA, bhaNavA javuM che ke tAre bAkhaDI bAMdhavI che ? tyAre kahe, "nA, bAkhaDI bAMdhavAnI pahelAM." bAkhaDI bAMdhavAnI kahevAya ene. tame bAkhaDI zabda sAMbhaLelo ? tame hau sAMbhaLelo ? tyAre sAruM. praznakartA: to sAheba tamane kazuM kahI nA zake ? dAdAzrI : kahe ya kharA, paNa kahevAya nahIM. ene bhaDaka lAge ke bahAra patharo mAraze, mAthuM toDI nAkhe. praznakartA : dAdA, tame AvAM tophAnI hatA ? dAdAzrI : kharA, tophAnI kharA. mAla ja tophAnI badho, ADo mAla. praznakartA ane emAM AvuM 'jJAna" thaI gayuM, e to bahu kahevAya.

Page #32
AptavANI-9 13 dAdAzrI : "jJAna" thaI gayuM. kAraNa ke mahIM cokhyuM hatuM ne ! mamatA nahotI. vAMdho ja A ahaMkArano hato. paNa mamatA nahotI eTale A dazA thaI ! saheje mamatA nahIM, lAlaca nahIM paNa mAruM nAma dIdhuM ke pelAnuM AvI banyuM. eTale keTalAMka to mArI pAchaLa evuM kahe, AnI miyAMpaNI bahu ja che. tyAre keTalAMka to kaheze, "are, javA do ne tuMDamijAjI che." eTale mArA mATe zuM zuM vizeSaNa vaparAya, te badhuM pAchaLa rahIne jANuM pAcho. paNa mane mamatA nahotI. e mukhya guNa sarasa hato, eno pratApa A ! ane mamatAvALo so gaNo DAhyo hoya to ya saMsAramAM ja UMDo Utarelo hoya. ame mamatArahita, te kharekhara majhA AvI. A mamatA e ja saMsAra che. ahaMkAra e saMsAra nathI. ne te mane ya lAgyuM ke have pAMsaro thaI gayo chuM. koIe pAMsaro karavo nA paDe mane. praznakartA : kevI rIte pAMsarA thaI gayA, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : lokoe mArI-ThokIne, UMdhuM-catuM karIne, Amatema sakaMjAmAM laIne paNa pAMsaro karI nAkhyo. praznakartA : e AgalA avatAromAMthI cokhkhuM thatuM gayeluM ne ? dAdAzrI : keTalAMya avatArathI A pAMsarA thatAM AvelAM, tyAre A avatAramAM puro pAMsaro thayo. bAkI, hindustAnano mAla pAMsaro nA hoya, ADo ja hoya. keTalAMka to janma letI vakhate mAthuM nIce hoya, tene badale mAthuM upara hau hoya. ane keTalAMka to garbhamAM ADA thaI jAya che. te enI mAne ya mAre, e ya mare ane badhAMyane mAre, ne DokaTarane ya phajeta kare. praznakartA : paNa emAM enI evuM karavAnI icchA na hoya. e to thaI jAya ne ? dAdAzrI : mULathI ADo svabhAva eTale, jyAM jAya tyAM ADo thAya. garbhamAM ya ADo. e jyAM jAya tyAM ADo ! ane sIdho hoya te jyAM jAya tyAM sIdho cAle. 14 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : hindustAnanA lokomAM ADAI che ane mokSanA adhikArI paNa e ja che. dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, ADA hoya te ja mokSe jAya. ane ADAI to, samajaNavALo kare ke aNasamajaNavALo kare ? samajaNavALo ja kare, ADAIo ? praznakartA : paNa e UMdhI samajaNa che ne, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e samajaNa aMtarAI tethI ! ane tyAM phorenamAM ADAI nahIM. ene to jevuM hoya evI sIdhI vAta. praznakartA : e samajaNa aMtarAI, e phoDa pADo ne, dAdA. dAdAzrI : ApaNI vadhelI samajaNa e aMtarAI. ApaNI samajaNa helpa' nA kare to samajaNa avaLe raste cAle. ADAI jAya to ukela AvI gayo. ADAI kharI rIte ahaMkAra gaNAya che. e ahaMkArano phaNago ja che. ahaMkAratA AdhAre ! ADAI game che tamane ? praznakartA : gamatI to nathI, paNa jatI ya nathI. dAdAzrI : e to huM kADhI ApIza. ADAIo UbhI thAya che. jatI nathI, e tamane bhAna thAya che ne ? te ja jAgRti che. nahIM to e bhAna ja nA thAya ne ! ADAIo UbhI thAya che, e bhAna ja kyAM che ?! e ApaNe kahyuM hoya ke, "AvI ADAI karo cho ?" tyAre e kahe, 'tame ja ADA cho' evuM tarata sAmuM mAre ke nA mAre ? 'bosa' ema kahe, 'tame ADAI karo cho.' to moDhe nA bole, bosache eTale. paNa aMdarakhAne manamAM kahyA vagara rahe nahIM. kAraNa ke ahaMkAra zuM nA kare ? ahaMkArathI ja UbhuM rahyuM che. ahaMkAranA AdhAra upara UbhuM rahyuM che. ahaMkAra vilaya thAya eTale paramAtmA ja che.

Page #33
AptavANI-9 praznakartA : paNa tyAM to amArAthI 'A khoTuM che' evuM keTalIka vakhata kahevAI jAya che. dAdAzrI : hA, kahevAI jAya. e to anAdinI Teva che ne, ApaNI ! te ApaNane khabare ya paDe ke A khoTuM thayuM. evuM kahevAI gayA pachI khabara paDe ne ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : paNa anAdinI Teva che. eTale 'ekazana-rIekazana'no niyama che ne ! eTale ekadama kaMI baMdha nA thAya. 'tathI thatuM' nA bolAya ! have tamAre 'ADAI jatI nathI' evuM nA kahevuM. kAraNa ke huM lokone pUchuM chuM ke, 'zuM thAya che ?" tyAre e kahe che, "sAheba, jANIe chIe badhuM, paNa thatuM nathI.alyA, kaI jAtanAM mANaso cho ? AtmAnI AvI dazA karI nAkhI ?! AtmA to jevo kaltha evo thaI jAya, e huM kahuM chuM, to ya tame AvuM bolo cho ? 'jANuM chuM badhuM ya, paNa thatuM nathI' kaho cho ? to pachI AtmA evo ja thaI jAya, pAMgaLo thaI jaze. evuM nA bolAya ke "jANuM chuM badhuM ya, paNa thatuM nathI.' 'thatuM nathI' evuM to bolAya ja nahIM. hA, nA thatuM hoya to e ya jANyA karo. paNa tethI karIne 'nathI thatuM' ema bolAya nahIM. mane tAva koI vakhata Ave, to koI pUche ke, 'tamane tAva Avyo che ?" tyAre huM kahuM ke, 'hA, bhaI, e.ema.paTelane tAva Ayo che te huM jANuM chuM.' 'mane tAva Avyo' evuM kahuM to mane coMTI jAya. jevo kalpa evo thaI jAya tarata. eTale huM evuM nA boluM.. AtmAno mukhya svabhAva, jevo kalpa evo thaI jAya. tame kaho ke huM bhagavAna chuM, to tevAM thaI jAva. ane tame kaho ke, 'huM nAlAyaka chuM to tevAM thaI jAva. kahetAMnI sAthe ja te rUpa thaI jAva. bhagavAna thavuM joIe ema kaho, te ghaDIe bhagavAna thaI jAya kharA, paNa kaheze, 'have zuM karuM te ?" eTale tamane AvaDe nahIM, te pAchAM hatA evAM ne evA DaphoLa thaIne UbhA raho. AvaDavuM joIe ne ?! ApaNe je pada AptavANI-9 pAmyA, tyAM AgaLa have mAre zuM karavuM e AvaDavuM joIe ne ?! nahIM to pAchAM hatA tevAM ne tevAM thaI jAva. eTale AtmA jevo ciMtave evo thaI jAya, evo hovAthI aneka jAtanAM rUpo ne rUpAMtara badhuM thayA ja kare che. ane ciMtave che te ya svataMtrapaNe ciMtavato nathI. AjubAjunA bhIDAne laIne tevuM ciMtave che. e jJAta ja vartatAmAM ! praznakartA: to ADAInuM 'rUTa kojha' zuM ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra. praznakartA : paNa e 'kojhijha' karelAM eTale enI 'IphekTa'ne ? dAdAzrI : A 'iphekTa' che. paNa 'kojhijha' ryA tyAre ne ! 'kojhijha' kevI rIte paDe che ? ke paheluM ADAInuM jJAna thAya ke ADA thaI jaIzuM ne, eTale badhAM ThekANe AvI jaze. evuM ene jJAna thAya. "gharanAM badhAM mANasone ThekANe lAvavA ADA thaIzuM, ADAI kAma lAge kharekharI.' e jJAna thAya ene. e pachI A zraddhA bese enI. A zraddhA e jJAnane 'sTroMga" kare. zraddhA vagaranuM jJAna hoya ne, to to UDI jAya. paNa zraddhA beThI eTale zraddhA ane majabUta kare. ane pachI e ADAI cAritramAM Ave ane jo majhA (!) pachI Ave ! ADAIo darekatI judI ! praznakartA : badhAMne ekasarakhI ADAI nA hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : ADAI judI judI jAtanI hoya. tyAre zAke ya eka ja jAtanAM hoya che badhAM kaMI ? zAke ya judI jAtanuM, ADAI ye judI jAtanI, kaDhIno svAde ya judI judI jAtano, 'hAITa' ya badhAnI judI jAtanI, raMge ya badhAnA judI jAtanA. badhuM judI judI jAtanuM ja che ne ! A "jJAna' maLe eTale ADAI jatI rahe ane koIne ADAI rahI hoya to e dekhAya ne ! enI potAnI icchA ene saMgharavAnI nA hoya.

Page #34
AptavANI-9 saMgharo karavAnI icchA nA hoya ke lAva beMkanA khAnAmAM mUkI AvIe, evuM nA hoya. e ADAIo, aMtavALI ! praznakartA : ApaNe nakkI karIe chIe chatAM 'eDajasTa' nathI thavAtuM. enI pAchaLa kAraNa zuM rahyuM che ? kAM to ApaNI ADAI che ke kAM to pachI ApaNuM 'vyavasthita' evuM che mATe A prayatno saphaLa thatA nathI ? dAdAzrI : nA, ADAI rahI che ethI. badhI ja ADAIo che. jene ADAI gaI ane pachI badho gUMcavADo gayo. tamAre ADAIo javA mAMDI che te eka dahADo khalAsa thaI jaze. kAraNa ke TAMkIno naLa khullo mUkI dIdho che ne navI Avaka baMdha che. eTale TAMkI eka dahADo khAlI thaI javAnI. have ADAIonAM kArakhAnAmAM navuM utpAdana thatuM nathI ne junI ADAIo nIkaLyA kare che. eka ADAI Ave ne eno aMta Ave. pachI pAchI bIjI ADAI Ave. e gaI ke pachI pAchI trIjI ADAI Ave. jeTalI ADAI Ave eTalI pachI jAya. saraLa, chatAM sUkSma ADAIo ! praznakartA H AptasUtramAM vAkya Ave che ke, "jJAna thatAM pahelAM ame Akho ADAIno samudra oLaMgyo. eTale eka eka ADAIne ame bhAMgI tyAre A jJAna pragaTa thayuM." dAdAzrI : hA, badhI bahu ADAIo hatI. lokone dekhAya nahIM, paNa amane lAge ke mahIM ADAIo che. lokone jo ke saraLa lAge. e nAnI nAnI ADAIo, sUkSma ADAIo, ahaMkArI ADAIo hatI. dehanI ADAIo nahIM, risAya evI nahIM. ahaMkAranI ADAI ! mane potAne khabara paDe ke A bhAInI joDe avaLuM pharyuM che A. pelAne A khabara nA paDe. praznakartA : e ADAImAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM ? sAmAnI sAcI vAta hoya ne ApaNe 18 AptavANI-9 badhuM avaLuM karIe to e ahaMkAra, gAMDapaNa ja kahevAya ne ! praznakartA: to ADAI che e ahaMkAranI ja vikRti che ne ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra ja. buddhine kazuM levAdevA nahIM. praznakartA : paNa e ahaMkAranI vikRti ja ne ? dAdAzrI : vikRti ja. vikRti eTale kevI ? loka pAchaLa kaheze, 'javA do ne, jarAka keka che, enuM nAma nA lezo." alyA, IjIna cAle che ne heDa zI rIte keka ?! tyAM to ApaNe ja cetavAtuM ! praznakartA : ghaNAM ya evAM hoya che ke ApaNe saheja vAta karIe ke 'bhAI, AnuM Ama.....' to sAme bacakuM ja bhare ! dAdAzrI : hA, hoya. paNa te ApaNe vAta karatAM pahelAM cetavuM joIe. nahIM to zuM nuM zuM thAya ! vaDhamvaDhA thaI jAya. kAraNa ke ApaNe zuM kahevA mAgIe e ene pahoMce nahIM. eTale e Ane UMdhuM samaje. ApaNI bhalI lAgaNIne e samaje nahIM. ene UMdhuM samaje. eTale pachI e sAmo thaI jAya. eTale ApaNe samajI javuM ke mArI vAta A bhAIne pahoMcatI nathI, huM phona karuM chuM te A bhAIne vAta pahoMcatI nathI. eTale ApaNe AgaLa vAta karavI baMdha rAkhavI. ne enI vAta sAMbhaLyA karavI, paNa ApaNI vAta pahoMcADavI nahIM. e ApaNA 'poInTa"ne samajato nathI. ene "jJAnI' ja pAMsaro kare ! praznakartA : koI ADAI kare tyAM zuM karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : e hiMmata lokone nA hoya ne ! e sthiratAnuM amAruM kAma. amArI pAse to pharI ADAI kare ja nahIM ne ! e ADAI kare to te dahADe kazuM ja dekhe nahIM. e hisAba kADhI jue, te pharI ADAI kare ja nahIM amArI pAse. A to ADAIne uttejana maLeluM ne, eTale ADAI vadhAre 'sTroMga' thayelI. A loka to bicArA nabaLA mANasa ane

Page #35
AptavANI-9 emAM koI ADAI kare, eTale e nabaLo mANasa zuM kahe ? "javA do ne, ene ' eTale A prajA to suMvALI prajAne, te ADAIne uttejana Ape che. mArI pAse Ave to khabara paDI jAya. praznakartA have A ADAI e pUrvabhavano mAla bharI lAvelo, evuM kharuM ? AptavANI-9 ApI zake? paNa e rAjIpo meLavavo sahelo nathI. ene mATe to saraLa thavuM paDe. 'jJAnI puruSa' to saraLa hoya, nAnuM doDha varSanuM bALaka hoya ne, tenAM karatAM ya vadhAre saraLa hoya. have saraLa AgaLa ApaNe asaraLa rahIe to pachI e rAjIpo kema maLe ? 'levala' joIe AmAM ! tamane samajAyuM ne, A badhuM ?! nATakIya ahaMkAra ! dAdAzrI : te badhuM pUrvabhavanuM ja che ne ! A badhuM A bhavanuM kazuM nathI. praznakartA : to pachI A uttejana maLe pachI majabUta thAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, majabUta thAya ne, pachI. paNa niHspRha AgaLa koI pahoMcI nA vaLe. saraLatAthI rajIpo prApta ! 'jJAnI'nI niHspRhatA AgaLa koI pahoMcI nA vaLe. jene "mAruM potAnuM-parAyuM' rahyuM nathI, e cAhe so kare. emano rAjIpo laI lIdho hoya to brahmAMDa khuza thaI jAya. paNa emano rAjIpo jaladI thAya evo nathI. kAraNa ke 'jJAnI puruSa' atyaMta saraLa che, eTale emano rAjIpo meLavavo muzkela che. emanAM eka kalAkano rAjIpo to ApaNuM kAma kADhI nAkhe. huM kahuM chuM ne badhAne, meM badhAne 'gereMTI' ApI che, ke eka kalAkamAM mArA jevuM pada ApI zakuM, jene joItuM hoya tene paNa evI saraLatA lAvavI muzkela che ne ! 'jJAnI puruSa' atyaMta saraLa che eTale rAjIpo nA thAya. jo 'jJAnI puruSa' asaraLa hota ne, to rAjIpo thAya. jyAre A to atyaMta saraLa kahevAya. have saraLane kevI rIte khuza karavA ? pote saraLa thAya to e khuza thAya. hA, e 'levala'mAM kaMIka nIce Utare to khuza thAya. nahIM to kevI rIte khuza thAya te ?! bAkI, 'jJAnI puruSa'no eka kalAkano rAjIpo AkhA brahmAMDano mAlika banAvI de, eTalo badho rAjIpo hoya. jJAnI puruSa', ke jene A 'varlDamAM koI cIja joItI nathI e zuM nA praznakartA : AptasUtramAM che ke "vahetA ahaMkArano vAMdho nathI, paNa ahaMkArane saheja pakaDyo, enuM nAma ADAI." have e vaheto ahaMkAra che e kayo ahaMkAra ? dAdAzrI : A strIono ahaMkAra jozo to e badho vaheto ahaMkAra. 'A hamaNe huM kaDhI karuM chuM, hemaNe Ama zAka karI nAkhuM, tema karI nAkhuM" e badhuM bole te badho ahaMkAra, paNa te vaheto ! ane puruSo to ahaMkArane pakaDe. 'meM Ama kahyuM hatuM ne te Ama karyuM ?" e ADAI. praznakartA : eTale vaheto ahaMkAra e nATakIya ahaMkAra kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e nATakIya ja ahaMkAra. vahetA ahaMkArano vAMdho nathI. puruSane vaheto ahaMkAra hoya to ya vAMdho nathI. vaheto ahaMkAra pakaDI rAkhyo e ADAI thaI. e ADAIo "jANavA'thI jAya ! praznakartA : potAne khabara paDI ke ADAI thaI che potAnI, have emAM pAchuM pharI javuM hoya to kevI rIte phare ? dAdAzrI : ADAI thaI e jANyuM, enuM nAma ja pAcho phare che. ADAIne jANatI vakhate ja pAcho pharI jAya. jANato nathI tyAM sudhI pAcho nA phare, ne jANyuM eTale pAcho ja phare. praznakartA e pAchA pharavAmAM bIjAM kayA 'eDajasTamenTa' levAM paDe ? dAdAzrI : bIjuM kazuM nahIM. e to enI meLe pAcho ja pharI jAya.

Page #36
AptavANI-9 tyAM zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : paNa mArA jevAM kahe ne, ke 'kyAM cAlyo ? ApaNe javAnuM kaye gAma ?" ghaNAM evA che ke jo ene cokhkhuM kahIe to e ADo cAle. eTale mAre pheravIne bolavuM paDe che. haju kAcuM ne, badhuM. paTAvI paTAvIne kAma levAnuM. bAbAone to samajAya samajAya karIe. praznakartA : badhA bAbA jevA dekhAya ne paTAvI paTAvIne tamAre mokSe laI javAnA. te vakhate Apane keTalI badhI karuNA rahetI haze ?! AptavANI-9 21 ane je prayoga joItA hoya e badhA prayoga sAthe pAcho pharI jAya, 'eDajasTamenTa' prayoga hoya tenAthI. ApaNuM "jJAna" lIdheluM hoya to ADAIne jANe. nahIM to jANe ja nahIM ne ! ane A to pote potAnA doSa dekhe. praznakartA : ADAIne jANe tyAre pAcho pharI jAya. have ene jANe kaI rIte ? ADAIne oLakhe kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : tarata oLakhe. ApaNuM "jJAna" lIdheluM hoya eTale tarata oLakhe ke A ADAI karavA mAMDI. vyavahArikatA che ke nahIM te badhuM tarata khabara paDI jAya ane vyavahArikatAnI bahAra karavA mAMDayuM te ya khabara paDI jAya. praznakartA : paNa potAnI ADAI potAne kaI rIte khabara paDe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNuM jJAna hoya to khabara paDe. nahIM to khabara nA paDe. ane e khabara paDI hoya ne, tenI para pachI DhAMkI de ane ADAImAM ja rahe. ApaNAM 'jJAnanA pratApe khabara paDe. praznakartA : DhAMkI de e zuM che ? dAdAzrI : enI para DhAMkI de, e "Dabala' ADAI. praznakartA : to pachI pelI ADAI nIkaLavAno 'skopa' ja nA rahyo ne ? dAdAzrI : vadhe UlaTI. praznakartA: paNa ApaNe to mULathI ADAI khalAsa karavAnuM lakSa hoya ne ? to tyAM zuM karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : tuM tArI jAte karI levA jaIza to tane nahIM phAve. mane pUchavuM ke A kemanuM che, te huM kahI daIza ke bhAI, A kADha ADAI ! praznakartA: eka to ADAI vastu UbhI thaI hoya, pAchuM ene pote DhAMke e "Dabala' ADAI. to pachI e pUchavA ja nA de ne, ADAI. to dAdAzrI : A badhA bAbA jevA dekhAya. bAbo risAya che, evuM. paNa paTAvI paTAvIne AgaLa laI javAnA. praznakartA : ane mAphI mAgIne ya paTAvatA tamane joyA che. dAdAzrI : paNa Amane mokSe laI javAnA che, te mATe cetIne cAlavuM paDe ne ?! enuM zuM jAya ? e to eka bhAI hato, te kahe che, 'dAdAjI, lo tamArAM pustaka ane A tamAruM jJAna tamane pAchuM ApyuM.' meM kahyuM, 'hA, bahu sAruM thayuM. tAro upakAra mAnuM chuM.' nahIM to rastAmAM pustaka pheMkI dIdhAM hota. enA karatAM A to ghare AvIne pAchAM ApI gayo. ene guNa nA mAnavo paDe ? 'A tamAruM jJAna pAchuM ApuM chuM' kahe che. e to huM ja laune nirAMte ! praznakartA : nirAMte, eTale pAchuM upakArI draSTithI lo. dAdAzrI : hA, A kaMI rastAmAM pheMkI nA dIdhAM, eTale DAhyo mANasa ! sAruM karyuM. praznakartA: A to Apa "jJAnI puruSa" cho, to sAmAnI ADAI nIkaLI zake. dAdAzrI : vahelI nIkaLI jAya. nahIM to mAra khAIne, khattA khAIkhAIne nIkaLe che. khattA khAya ne khattAnA anubhava thatA jAya ne, tema tema ADAI nIkaLatI jAya. nahIM to keTalAMya avatAre nIkaLe.

Page #37
AptavANI-9 23 24 e ta hovuM ghaTe ! praznakartA : A "jJAna" lIdhelA mahAtmAone ADAI vadhAre takalIpha Ape che ke aTakaNa vadhAre takalIpha Ape che ? dAdAzrI : aTakaNo ! ADAIo to bahu nahIM. ADAIone to e samaje che ke A ADAI e khoTI vastu che. A 'jJAna' maLyA pachI ADAI ene mAra khavaDAve. eTale A bharelI ADAI che, pUraNa karelI che te galana thAya che, e mAra khavaDAve che. eTale A ADAIno zokha nA hoya. paNa aTakaNa vadhAre pajave. have jo ke A doSo haju herAna kare badhA, jJAna hovA chatAM ya. A mAla che te nA hovo ghaTe. paNa have mArkeTamAMthI bharI lAvyo hoya, ene nA kahevAya nahIM ne, ApaNAthI ? je bharelo mAla che, je puraNa thayelo e galana thaze. navo pUraNa thavAno nathI. jUnuM galana thaI rahyuM che. jUnuM pUraNa kareluM che e galana thaI rahyuM che ne e ApaNuM ja pUraNa kareluM che. mATe ApaNe 'joI' 'joI' ane zuddha karI karIne 'leTa-go' karavAnuM, ene zuddhIkaraNa karIne 'leTa-go' karavAnuM. pachI te game tevuM hoya. chatAM kema karI e badho vyavahAra cokhkho nIkaLe evuM to hovuM joIe ne ? 'vAMko', te "pote' hoya ! meM to tamane sIdhAM karyA ne ! nathI karyA ? kAraNa ke AvuM koNa hatuM ? 'caMdubhAI'. te 'tame' to caMdubhAI hoya. to "ApaNe" kahI devuM ke "A huM hoya. huM to A zuddhAtmA." to bolo, tamArI ADAI jatI rahI ne ? tamane kema lAge che ? eTale A akrama vijJAne badhA gRhasthIne sIdhA banAvyA. sIdhA thavAne mATe sAdhu thavAnI jarUra che. jo gRhasthI sIdhA thayA to teno ukela ne sIdhA thavA mATe sAdhupaNuM karavAnuM che. potAne khabara paDe ke A 'caMdubhAI' vAMko ne 'huM sIdho. eTale 'tame to sAdhu thayA vagara sIdhA thaI gayA ne ! akrama vijJAna to sAruM che ne ! to ya pachI amane loka zuM kahe ? 'A caMdubhAI hatA tevAM ne AptavANI-9 tevAM ja che.' paNa e amAre jovAnuM nahIM. tyAM lokone ame zuM kahIe ? 'tamane je caMdubhAI dekhAya che e judA che ane mane dekhAya che e judA che.' loka khoDa kADhe ke nA kADhe ? ke A 'dAdA'nI pAchaLa paDyA ne haju to evA ne evAM cho, kahe ke nA kahe evuM ? to tyAM "ApaNe' 'te' vAMkA nA hoIe, paNa ApaNe e vAta sAMbhaLIe, eTale sAMbhaLIne pAchAM ghera jaIne 'ApaNe' 'caMdubhAIne kahIe paNa kharAM ke, "tame jevA cho evAM dekhAtA hoya evuM loka kaheze. mATe haju kaMI pAMsarA thaI jAva. 'dAdA' ne 'huM' beThA chIe. to amArI hAjarImAM pAMsarA thaI jAva." to e pAMsarA thaI jaze. bAkI, jAte pAMsaruM thavuM hoya to nA thavAya. kAM to guru pAMsaro karI Ape. paNa guru pAMsarA thayelA hovA joIe. paNa pAMsarA guru maLavA muzkela che ne ! evuM A "akrama vijJAta' ! eTale A to ADAI jene hatI, te 'huM' hoya. ema AkhI jagyA ja pote khAlI karI nAkhI ne ! pachI rahyuM ja zuM che ? gunegArImAM hato, e gunegArIpaNuM chUTI gayuM. ane mULa gunegAra hato tene tyAM ja rahevA dIdho. mULa gunegAra to 'e' ja hato. A to "ApaNe" vagara, kAmanA mahIM 'pArTanarazIpa' karI nAkhI hatI. pachI have sIdhA thaI gayA ne ? 'tame' pote sIdhA thayA eTale AnI, 'caMdubhAI"nI ADAI kADhI nAkhazo. jyAM sudhI 'pArTanarazIpa' hatI tyAM sudhI A "caMdubhAInI ADAI nA nIkaLe. have 'pArTanarazIpa' chUTI gaI, eTale 'tame' caMdubhAIne dhamakAvIne paNa ADAI kADhI nAkhazo. eTale A 'akrama vijJAna'no pratApa ke je vAMko che te 'huM' hoya, ane 'huM to A zuddhAtmA ! praznakartA : eTale jene sudhAravA phare che to ya sudhare nahIM, ne enI pAchaLa Akho bhava pUro thAya, paNa e vastu ja 'pote' hoto nathI ne ? evuM ja thayuM ne ?! dAdAzrI : hA, tethI pAra ja nA Ave ne ! tethI to anaMta avatAra bhaTakavAnuM ne !!

Page #38
AptavANI-9 e to tethI lokoe tIrthaMkara mahArAjane kaheluM ke he bhagavAna ! Apane je kaDIbaMdha lIMka maLI e ko'ka mahAbhAgyazALIne maLe ! kaDIbaMdha lIMka eTale ahIMthI AgaLano rasto, ethI AgaLano rasto, ethI AgaLano rasto ema maLI Ave. kaDIbaMdha ! ane TheTha sudhI pAchuM !! ane A lokone kaDIbaMdha lIMka maLe nahIM ane kyAMya cAlyA jAya. mane ya kaDIbaMdha lIMka maLI hatI. evI meM mArI jAta mATe zodhakhoLa karI ke A kaI jAtanuM banyuM ?! paNa te mane kaDIbaMdha lIMka maLelI ! tethI AkhuM A 'akrama vijJAna' pragaTa thayuM ne ! eTale A "je ADo che te 'huM' hoya" evuM jJAna thavuM, enuM nAma "akrama vijJAna'. ne "ADo te 'huM chuM ane sIdhuM mAre thavAnuM che", tenuM nAma krama ! risAyA ? to "gADI' jaze ! praznakartA : koI risAya e enI ADAIno prakAra kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM kahevAya ? nahIM to risAvAnI jarUra ja kyAM rahe che ? paNa ADo thayA vagara rahe nahIM. jarAka ene vAMkuM paDyuM eTale ADo thaIne Ubho rahe. vAMkuM paDavuM joIe. bAkI risAya tyAre AvuM kare ne ! sTezana para eka bhAInI vahu risAyelI AvelI. te bhAI ane kahe, 'gADImAM besI jA ne ! gADI UpaDI jaze, pachI rAta paDI jaze.' to ya e nA beThI. ane ene ya rakhaDI maravuM paDyuM. risAyelA mANasanI AgaLa to bAra gADIo jatI rahe. gADI kaMI risAyelAne manAvavA Ave ? jagata to cAlyA ja karavAnuM. jagata UbhuM rahe thoDI vAra ? tame risAva to jAnavALA UbhAM rahe ? jAnavALA chokaro paiNAvavA jatAM hoya ne tame risAyA ho te tamArA sAruM besI rahe be dahADA ? nA. evuM che A jagata ! praznakartA: A jAnanI aMdara pitarAI risAya ne chevaTe saMdezo mokale ke tame amane manAvavA Avo eTale ame mAnI jaIzuM. AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : te gADI UpaDatAMnA 'TAIma" mAne. ene anubhava thayelo che ke A gADI UpaDI jaze. jagata to cAlyA kare che. amatho tuM tArI jAte ADAI zuM karavA kare che ? e to evuM che ne, ke A gADInAM gArDa joDe ke DrAIvara joDe huM risAyo, to pelo thoDIvAre kahe ke, 'bhAI, besI jAva ne ! atyAre zuM kAma jhaghaDo karo cho ? besI jAvane !' paNa huM risAuM ke besavAno ja nathI, basa !" to pelo haDahaDATa Trena upADI jAya ke nA upADI jAya ? jagata kaMI UbhuM rahetuM haze ? jagata to cAlyA ja karavAnuM. tame enI joDe 'eDajasTa' thAva. nahIM to rakhaDI marazo 'sTezana' upara, pelo to sITI vagADe ne ? e ya joyeluM meM to. AvAM ya khela joyelA badhA, pelAe gADI upADI mUkIne A rahI gayelA ! praznakartA : pachI ene lAge ne, ke A gADI gaI ne mane khoTa gaI ? dAdAzrI : e zuM mAne ke, "meM karyuM che e ja kharuM che." e paNa e khoTa gaI evuM jo mAne, evI jo AvaData AvaDe to to pachI pharI bhUla rahe ja nahIM ne ! eTalI badhI samajaNa hoya nahIM. mANasa pote potAnI khoTane joI zake evI ya samajaNa nA hoya emAM. mANasanuM gajuM nahIM ne ! e to bahu ja zakti joIe. gADI upaDyA pachI manamAM nA thAya ke e to A 'korTa'nI tArIkha hatI ane AnI joDe kyAM jhaghaDo karyo ? pachI manamAM pastAvo nA thAya baLyo ? korTamAM tArIkha hoya ane kaMI kAraNasara ApaNane sAco jhaghaDo hoya, bhUla e lokonI hoya, ApaNI bhUgla nA hoya, chatAM ya paNa gADI upaDatAM pahelAM e bhUlano nikAla karI nAkhavo joIe ne ? pelA vinaMtI kare ke, 'bhaI, have mUkIne, Ane UMcuM ahIMthI ! e mAstaranI bhula thaI.' ema loko bole to ya ApaNe nA besIe tyAre ghanacakkara ja kahevAya ne ? pachI pelo 'vhIsala' ja vagADe ne ?! te evI rIte A jagata cAlI jAya che ane pelA mUrakhA besI rahe che bAMkaDA para. praznakartA : ene pachI eka-be jaNAM kahevAvALA ya maLI Ave ke tame barobara karyuM che.

Page #39
AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : hA. evuM kahenArA pAchAM maLI Ave ne, ke barobara karyuM che. cA laI AvuM ke nAsto lAvuM ?" be rUpiyA hoya te ya loka paDAvI le pAchAM. ekaMdare AmAM majhA nathI. 23 A 'dAdA'nI gADImAMthI UtArIne kADhI mUke, mAre to ya pesI jajo pAchaLathI. ahIMthI kADhI mUke to ApaNe bIjA DabbAmAM pesI javuM. pAchA tyAM koI kADhI mUke to trIjA DabbAmAM javuM. pAchA tyAMthI ya kADhI mUke tyAre cothA DabbAmAM javuM ! lokono dhaMdho zuM ? kADhI melavuM. paNa ApaNe to pharI koI DabbAmAM pesI javuM, gADI cUkI javI nahIM. temAM khoTa kone ? huM to nAnapaNamAM risAto hato, thoDuM ghaNuM. ko'ka dahADo risAyo hoIza. bahu risAyelo nahIM. to ya meM saravaiyuM kADhI joyuM ke risAvAmAM tadana khoTa che, e vepAra ja tadana khoTano che. eTale pachI kyAreya paNa risAvuM nahIM, evuM nakkI ja kareluM. koI ApaNane game te kare to ya risAvuM nahIM. kAraNa ke e bahu khoTavALI vastu che. eTale meM to nAnapaNathI risAvAnuM choDI dIdheluM. mane thayeluM ke bahu moTuM nukasAna che A to. huM risAyelo kharo, paNa te divase savAranuM dUdha gayuM ! te pachI meM te divase zuM zuM gayuM eno hisAba kADhayo, sAMje hatA tenAM te pAchAM. manAyA tyAre UlaTuM nukasAna gayuM. te meM khoLI kADhyuM. pachI mane manAvyA rophathI mAna ApIne ! paNa savAranuM dUdha ya badhuM gayuM ne ! eTale eka-be pherA nAnapaNamAM risAI joyeluM. paNa emAM khoTa gayelI, eTale tyArathI pharI meM risAvAnuM choDI dIdheluM. A khoTa jAya ke nA jAya ? praznakartA : jAya. dAdAzrI : have to ApaNe AtmA thayA. have ApaNane AvuM nA hoya. tame ko'ka dahADo risAyelA ke ? nahIM ke ? koI risAya che kharuM gharamAM ? praznakartA : nA. 28 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : tyAre sAruM che. praznakartA : Ape kahyuMne, ke dUdha amAruM gayuM, risAyA tethI. te kaI uMmare ? dAdAzrI : te nava-dasa varSanI uMmare. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, nava-dasa varSanI uMmare ame ya evI rIte dUdha gumAvyA hatA. te amane ya khoTa paDe pelI peTanI, eTale ema to thAya ke A khoTa gaI. paNa to ya ame cAlu rAkhyuM ne tame baMdha kevI rIte karI dIdhuM ? dAdAzrI : mAre to savAranuM dUdha ne e badhuM gayuM. meM hisAba kADhyo hato ke A risAyo tethI ATalI khoTa gaI ! mATe risAvuM e naryuM khoTavALuM che. mATe ApaNe A baMdha karI do. ADuM thavuM nahIM. tyAre A ADAI ja kahevAya ne ! ApaNe haThe caDhIe ke 'mAruM dUdha ATaluM ochuM kema ?' are melane pULo, pI le ne. pharI vArake Apaze. bAne huM zuM kaheto hato ? 'mane ne bhAbhIne badhAMne sarakhAM gaNo cho tame bA ? bhAbhIne acchera dUdha, te mane ya acchera dUdha Apo cho ? ene ochuM Apo.' mAre acchera rahevA devuM hatuM. mAre vadhAravuM nahotuM. paNa bhAbhIne ochuM karo, doDha pAzera karo. tyAre bA mane zuM kahe che ? 'tArI bA to ahIM che. enI bA ahIM nathI ne ! ene khoTuM lAge bicArIne. ene duHkha thAya. eTale sarakhuM ApavuM paDe.' to ya paNa mAre meLa paDe nahIM. paNa bA mane samajAva samajAva kare, thIMgaDAM mAra mAra kare. eTale eka phero ADo thayo, te pachI khoTa gaI. eTale meM kahyuM ke have pharI ADuM thavuM nathI. nahIM to badhA tyAre kaheze, 'rahevA do tyAre ene !' te pachI evuM ja thAya ne ! pachI pharI tA risAyA kadI ! praznakartA : A khoTane tarata oLakhI, e to vANiyAbuddhi thaI ne ? dAdAzrI : e to evuM kaMI nahIM. vANiyAbuddhi eTale vaNikabuddhi kahevAya. ane viNaka eTale vicArazIla buddhi kahevAya, DahApaNavALI

Page #40
AptavANI-9 buddhi kahevAya. paNa khoTane oLakhe pachI pharI khoTa nA khAya ne ?! risAya eTale khoTa jAya. tame eka dahADo risAIne rAtre dhamapachADA karIne nA khAva to pachI badhAM zuM kare ? badhAM jAgatAM rahe ? badhAM ya vakhata thAya eTale UMghI jAya. eTale khoTa tamane jAya. 29 zuM risAmaNAM ne manAmaNAM pAchAM ?! ane manAve ya koNa baLyuM ? A to jamavAnuM thAya eTale kaheze, 'cAlo jamavA kAkA, jamavA heMDo ne ! tyAM AgaLa taiyAra thaI gayuM che. badhAM besI rahyAM che.' tyAre pelA kahe, 'nA, atyAre jamavA nathI AvavAno, jAva.' te pelA loko eka-be vakhata vinaMtI kare, pachI ? pachI Tebala para jamavAnuM to cAlu thaI ja jAya ne ! eTale ame pharI risAyA nathI. atyAre ya, haju ya koI dahADo koInI joDe ame risAyA nathI. bhAgIdAranI joDe ya ame risAyelA nahIM. e risAyelA koI vakhata. paNa te amArAmAM risALa dekhe nahIM eTale pachI e paNa pharI risAya nahIM. 'risALa' ja risAyelAne jue ! eka bhAI mane kahetA hatA ke, "mArI vAIpha mArI joDe risAya che.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'risAya che, te ene jonAro koNa ? 'tuM' nahIM. A 'risALa' che te jue che. koNa jue che ? 'risALa' che te jue che, 'tuM' hoya ! eTale 'tAre' jANavuM ke A 'risALa' joI rahyo che. je 'risALa' hoya, te risAyelAne jue. AtmA, AtmAne ja jue ! AtmA bIjI avasthAne jue ja nahIM. ciDhAyelo hoya, te ciDhAyelAne jue. eTale meM e bhAIne kaheluM ke, 'baI to risAyelI hatI, e eno AtmA hoya, e to baI che. ane A risALa che e tAro AtmA hoya. A baI konI para risAya che ? risALa upara risAya che, te tuM jo ! tuM joyA kara.' AnAthI 'solyuzana' Ave ne ? nahIM to 'solyuzana' kema Ave ? A to koI risAyA kare, koI gALo bhAMDyA kare ane e to ema ja hoya. paNa AtmA A badhA paryAyothI judo che. AtmA AmAM koI jagyAe che nahIM. A badhuM thaI rahyuM che, e zenA AdhAre ? sahu sahunAM 30 AptavANI-9 karmothI che badhuM. A karmaphaLa maLyA kare che, temAM 'ApaNe' zuM levAdevA ? sahu sahunAM karma bhogave, temAM 'ApaNe' zI levAdevA ? evI rIte A che. jo AtmA prApta karavo hoya to AtmA juo, bIjuM jovA jevuM nathI. amArI samajaNamAM kevuM haze ? tamArI samajaNa ne amArI samajaNamAM phera haze ne ? amane kazuM duHkha aDatuM nathI, enuM zuM kAraNa che ? kAraNa ke amArI samajaNa che amArAmAM. ame aNasamajaNane kheMcI nathI lAvatA. ane A to aNasamajaNane bahArathI, lokonI pAsethI kheMcI lAve ! ApaNe lokonI sAthe zuM levAdevA ? badhuM 'vyavasthita' che, hisAba che. hisAbanI bahAra kazo pheraphAra thavAno nathI. copaDAnA hisAbathI bahAra pheraphAra thAya kharo ? to zenA sAruM A badhuM ? ane vAIpha risAI hoya, tene risALa hoya te ja ene risAyelI joI zake, eno AtmA nA joI zake. je risALa hoya te ja jue. risALa mANasa risAyelAne jue che. nahIM to risAyelo kema dekhAvo joIe ? mArI pAse risAyelA nahIM AvatA hoya ? paNa mane risAyeluM koI nA dekhAya. kaMI hisAba to kADhavo paDaze ne ? Ama hisAba vagara copaDA cAlatAM haze ? hisAba to joIe ne ? vItarAgatAtI anokhI rIta ! praznakartA : ApanI sAme koI risAya to enA pratye Apa kevI rIte rAkho ? dAdAzrI : bilakula vItarAgabhAvathI ! kheMca-beMca amane nahIM, ene manAvavAnI bhAvanA nahi. ApaNane ema lAge ke manAvavAthI vAMkuM thAya evuM che, to bilakula baMdha ! ane ApaNane lAge ke manAvyAthI sIdhuM thAya evuM che, to ekAda zabda ame kahIe ke, 'bhAI, amArI bhUlacUka thaI hoya to, besone nirAMte. bhUlacUka to mArI ya thAya ne tamArI ya thAya' ema kahIne ene besADIe. paNa kheMca nahIM, vItarAgatA hoya. niraMtara vItarAgatA hoya ! ane enA tarapha kiMcitmAtra abhAva nahIM ane bhAva nahIM. ane pachI 'dAdA bhagavAna'ne kahI devAnuM ke enI para kRpA utAro. ane 'caMdubhAI' ane 'caMdubhAI'nAM mana-vacana-kAyA, bhAvakarma-dravyakarma

Page #41
AptavANI-9 31 nokarmathI bhinna evAM 'tamArA' 'zuddhAtmA'ne kahI dauM ke 'caMdubhAInI upara kRpA utAro. te badhAM 'kanekazana' huM meLavI ApuM. pachI vItarAgatAthI rahuM. e risAyelo ne huM A sIdho, vyavahAra amAre cAlyA kare ! thoDo vakhata e mUMjhAyA kare, pachI nIkaLI jAya badhuM. praznakartA: to dAdA, evuM kharuM ne, ke risALa mANasa hoya tene sAmethI jo protsAhana nA maLe to enI rIta ene ApoApa choDavI paDe ? AptavANI-9 evAM mANasa hoya ene ame bolAvIe. e vyavahAra sAcavavo paDe, e vyavahAra sAcavIe ame. ane pelA tIrthakara bhagavAna che te evuM nA sAcave. emane khaTapaTa nahIM ne ! ane A to khaTapaTa amArI !! praznakartA : e khaTapaTano vibhAga Apano rahyo che, mATe to ame badhAM Ama ApanI pAse AvI zakIe chIe. dAdAzrI : hA, te ja. ene laIne to huM aTakyo chuM e A lokonuM mArAM jevuM kema kalyANa thAya, eTaluM ja, ene mATe khaTapaTa ! khaTapaTe ya ene mATe ne ! A badho vepAra ja eno ne ! ane lokonuM paNa kalyANa thaI jAyane ! lokone vItarAgatA jovAnI maLe ahIM AgaLa. praznakartA: have pelI vyavahAranI bAbatanI ADAI je che ne, ke A dUdha ochuM ApyuM emAM risAyA. to mokSamArgamAM ADAI kevI hoya dAdAzrI : evAne ame protsAhana ApIe nahIM. koI dahADo nA ApIe, jarA ya nA ApIe. protsAhanathI evo mANasa avaLo thAya che. A chokarA joDe ya vItarAgatAthI rahevAthI te bahu sArAM thAya che. e chokarAMne ya protsAhana ApIe to chokarAM avaLAM cAle. vItarAgatA joIe ! chokarAM Ave eTale hAtha pheravavo, nA Ave to kaMI nahIM, evuM ! Ave to hAtha pheravavo ne 'hITa hITa' kare to kaMI nahIM. pachI pharI Ave to enA upara hAtha pheravavo. e kazuM kare e ApaNe dhyAnamAM levAnuM nahIM, ApaNe vItarAga rahevuM. e kazuM kare, tene ApaNe gaNavAnuM nahIM, noMdha karavAnI nahIM. praznakartA : e bahu moTI vastu che ne ! dAdAzrI : noMdha nahIM ! noMdha to kleza karAvaDAve. noMdha jarA ya nahIM. koInAM sAruM noMdha nahIM karavAnI. A badhAne ame vaDhIe, paNa noMdha nahIM. eka kalAke ya noMdha nahi. noMdha rAkhIe to amAruM magaja bagaDI jAya. ame to noMdhapothI ja kADhI nAkhelI. dAdAzrI : A narI mokSamArganI ja ADAI, tethI saMsAra Ubho rahyo che, mokSa aTakyo che ! nahIM to mokSa to tArI pAse ja che ne ! e ADAI enI dIvAlo che badhI. hajI ADAI che, narI ADAInuM poTaluM ! enuM dhAryuM ja kare !! enuM nAma zuM ! praznakartA : sAmAnI pAse potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavuM e ADAImAM gaNAya ? dAdAzrI : bIjuM zuM tyAre ? ADAI nahIM tyAre bIjuM zuM ? ane e risAI karIne chevaTe trAguM karIne ya paNa dhAryuM karAve. trAguM tame joyeluM nahIM ? tamane tAva caDhI jAya, trAguM juo to ! sAmo mANasa trAguM kare to tamane tAva nA caDhelo hoya to ya tAva traNa DigrIe caDhI jAya. praznakartA : trAguM eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : trAguM eTale pote evuM karavuM ke sAmo bhaDakIne pachI vItarAga', chatAM ya "khaTapaTa' ! praznakartA : te dAdA, e AMkhanI aMdara niSkAraNa karuNA hoya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e ja. bIjuM zuM ? A to niSkAraNa karuNA ! enA AtmA upara ja amArI draSTi hoya, enA pudgala upara draSTi nA hoya. chatAM ya vyavahAra ame sAcavIe pAchAM ke A satsaMgane hitakArI mANasa che, eTale "Avo padhAro" ema kahyA karIe. bIjA lokonuM hita kare

Page #42
AptavANI-9 33 potAnI vAta 'eksepTa' karI de. potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavA mATe game tevuM kare. mAthuM phUTe, Ama kUTe, kUdAkUda kare, raDe, cheDo vALe. ApaNane cogaradamathI bivaDAvI mAre, enuM nAma trAguM kahevAya. praznakartA : DhoMga kare ane trAguM kare emAM pharaka zuM ? dAdAzrI : DhoMga kare che ke trAguM kare che, e badhuM potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavA mATe ja kare che ! atyAre badhAM jamavA bese ne eka bhAI kaheze ke 'huM khAvAno nathI.' e trAgAM kahevAya. A to sArAM loka che ke kahe che, nA, bhAI, jamI lo, nA, bhAI, jamI lo !' te jamADe che. paNa jo loka khasI jAya ne, to enI meLe tyAM pachI jamI le. koI bhUkhyo marI jAya evo nathI. e trAguM na kahevAya ! praznakartA : keTalAMka to gusso Ave ne, to rUmanAM bAraNAM baMdha karIne pesI jAya. A badhAM, AkhuM ghara upara-nIce thAya, paNa bAraNuM khole ja nahIM e trAguM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e trAguM nathI kahevAtuM. e ADAI kahevAya. trAguM vastu judI che. praznakartA : chAtI kUTe, mAthuM phoDe pote potAnuM, e trAguM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e mAthuM phoDe te ya keTalIka ADAI hoya che ne keTaluMka trAguM hoya che. trAguM e zabda judI vastu che. trAgAmAM ene potAne kazI asara nA thAya. e ADAImAM to potAne mahIM upAdhi thayA karatI hoya. trAguM eTale khAlI nATaka ja ! A to ADAI kahevAya. trAgAmAM to raDatAM jAya ne bUmo pADatA jAya, paNa ene mahIM asara nA hoya. A bAraNAM vAsIne je karIe chIe, gharanAMne bhaDakAvI mArIe, e ADAI badhI. emAM to potAne upAdhi thatI hoya ne sAmAne ya upAdhi kare. ane trAgAmAM to ene aDe nahIM ne trAguM kare, enuM nAma trAguM ! vyAkhyA joIe ke nA joIe ? game tene tame trAguM kaho, evuM to nA bolAya ne ! 34 evAne cheTethI tamaskAra ! AptavANI-9 trAguM to bahu nukasAna kare. praznakartA : trAguM eTale, eno jarA dAkhalo ApIne samajAvo ne ! dAdAzrI : trAguM koI karato hoya to tamane nA khabara paDe ? trAguM karatAM bhale nA AvaDe. paNa trAguM koI karato hoya to te khabara paDe ne ! praznakartA : A satyAgraha kare e trAguM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e eka prakAranuM nAnuM trAguM ja kahevAya. paNa ene alaMkArI bhASAmAM bolI zakAya evuM che. alaMkArI bhASAmAM bolAya ke A satyAgraha kare che. ane trAguM e to, ene koI satyAgraha kahe ja nahIM ne ! trAguM eTale TUMkamAM kahevAmAM zo bhAvArtha che ke potAne jyAre je kaMI kAma karAvavuM ja hoya ane badhAM rAjI nA hoya to mArI-ThokIne karAvavuM. trAgAM karI karIne, bivaDAvI bivaDAvIne, Ama bivaDAve, tema bivaDAve, Ama kare, tema kare ne chevaTe dhAryuM karAve. praznakartA : sAma, dAma, daMDa, bheda vAparIne paNa karAvavAnA. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa dhAryuM badhuM karAvI le, karAvyA vagara choDe nahIM, enuM nAma trAguM ! e trAgAM meM joyelAM che, meM to pAMca-sAta vakhata joyelAM che. paNa meM to cheTethI namaskAra karelA, ke 'he trAguM, tuM ya nA dekhAIza ane karanAro to darzana ja nA Apazo.' A trAguM e to zIkhelI vastu che. pAchAM koI guru ene maLI Ave. A kaMI pote UbhI karelI vastu nathI. praznakartA : eTale potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavA mATe Agraha rAkhe e trAguM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : Agraha che e trAguM nA kahevAya. paNa DarAvIne pelAM lokonI pAse karAvI le. DarAve ne, ke nahIM to huM ApaghAta karIza, nahIM

Page #43
AptavANI-9 to huM Ama karI nAkhIza, tema karI nAkhIza ? 35 praznakartA : dhAkadhamakI, sAma, dAma, daMDa badhuM karIne. dAdAzrI : sAma, dAma, daMDa badhuM vAparIne. ane bicArAM saraLa mANaso te zuM kare ? kaheze, 'ApI do. ApaNuM je thavAnuM haze te thaze.' ne baI bicArI jaNaso hau ApI de. praznakartA : trAguM kare e to samajIne karato hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : badhuM samajIne ja. trAguM eTale potAnI jAte jANIjoIne banAvaTa ! trAgAMtA pariNAma ! praznakartA : to enuM pariNAma zuM bhogavavuM paDe ? dAdAzrI : e to AkhI tiryaMcagati oLaMgI le ! AkhI tiryaMcagati oLaMgI jAya, to e kaMI jevuM tevuM aizvarya (!) kahevAya ke ?! praznakartA : e raudradhyAnamAM Ave ? dAdAzrI : raudradhyAna to sAruM enAM karatAM, bahu rIte sAruM. eTale ApaNA ahIM koIe evo guno karyo hoya to mArI pAse mAphI mAMgI lejo. evuM be-pAMca vakhata thaze tyAre ekAda guno jato raheze. bahu khoTo guno kahevAya che. AkhI tiryaMcagati oLaMgIne narkagatimAM jAya. eya pAchI raudradhyAnathI maLe evI narkagati nahIM. A to jIvatAM ja lokone narkamAM nAkhIne pote trAguM karIne kAma kaDhAvI le che, game te bhoge. bhoga eTale game te thAva, paNa karAvIne ja choDe. trAmAM karatArAtI sAme ! praznakartA : Aje A kALamAM to ThekaThekANe AvuM trAguM thayA kare. dAdAzrI : nA, dareka ThekANe nahIM. e to nAnA prakAranuM. ane A trAgAM to bahu moTAM hoya. e to mAthA hauM phoDe. evo eka trAgAvALo 36 AptavANI-9 mArI pAse trAguM karavA mAMDyo. tyAre kahyuM, "bhaI, mahAdevajI pAse jaIne mAthuM vadhera. ahIM zuM karavA vadhere che ? A to mahAdevajInA mahAdevajI che ! tuM lAkha trAgAM karuM ne, to ya peTamAM pANI nA hAle evo puruSa che A.' mane jJAna nahotuM to ya huM kaheto'to ke, 'tuM mArI pAse lAkha trAgAM karuM to ya peTamAM pANI nahIM hAle evo huM chuM.' A trAgAMnI kaLA to bahu vasamI che. ame enAthI dUra bhAgIe chIe. e kaLA ame joyelI. eTale ame tamane kahIe. praznakartA : e trAgAM karanArano nyAya batAvavAno hoya to zuM karavuM ? banne trAgAMvALAM hoya to ? dAdAzrI : emAM huM paDuM nahIM. trAgAMnI bAbatamAM ame nA paDIe. praznakartA H nahIM, paNa nyAya batAvavAno prazna Ave to zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : are, nyAya batAvanAro ya AkhI tiryaMcagati oLaMge evuM thAya. mArI pAse koI trAguM karavA Avyo hoya to e to enI jiMdagImAM kho ja bhUlI jAya. e samajI jAya ke A trAguM karavuM e guno che. eka trAgAM karanArI bAI, emaNe mane zuM kahyuM ? ke ATalAM badhAM mANaso maLyAM, koInI pAse mAruM dhAryuM karAvI zakI nA hoya to te tame ekalAM ja cho. tyAre meM kaheluM ke tamArAM jevAne to oTIomAM rAkhIne pharuM chuM. praznakartA : trAguM karanArAnI sAme ene oTImAM ghAlIne kAma levuM, e zIkhavuM paDe ! e ya vidyA che ne ! dAdAzrI : e amane AvaDe. paNa emAM ya bahu paDavA jevuM nathI. A to nAchUTake AvI paDeluM hoya to huM paDuM. bAkI, A UbhuM karavA jevuM nathI. ame to bIjI jagyAe ya AvAM trAgAM joyelAM. dhaNI pelIno aMboDo jhAlIne kheMcIne Ave, mArI pAse nyAya karAvavA. pelI bAIye trAgAM karanArI ne A bhaIye trAgAM karanAro hoya ! eTale AvuM ame

Page #44
AptavANI-9 A eka ja bhAvathI. AptavANI-9 bahu joyeluM ! duniyA che te amane zuM raMga jovA nA maLyo hoya ?! eTale trAguM to enuM nAma kahevAya ke badhAM mANasone potAnI icchA vagare ya dabAI javuM paDe ane hA e hA kahevI paDe. jema polIsavALAne vaza thaI jAya che ne, evuM vaza thaI javuM paDe. ene trAguM kahevAya. praznakartA eTale evI pecamAM mUke ema ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, ene sakaMjAmAM mUke. praznakartA sAmo trAguM karato hoya to enI sAme ApaNuM vartana kevuM hovuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe to kahevuM ke bhaI, AvuM zA mATe karo cho ? kayA sukhane mATe karo cho ? A je paDAvI lIdheluM sukha che, e tArI pAse keTalA dahADA cAlaze ? praznakartA : chatAM ya pelo samaje nahIM to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : to khasI javuM. praznakartA : eTale ene namatuM ApI devAnuM ? dAdAzrI : e namatuM ApyA barAbara ja che. khasI javAnI rIta ja e che ne ! eTale Ama khasI ja javAnuM. sApa pAchaLa paDe to sApa bhAge ke ApaNe bhAgavuM paDe ? ApaNe khasI javAnuM. e sApane to zuM ?! A bheMsano bhAI ApaNI pAchaLa paDyo hoya to ApaNe ema kahIe ke, 'mArI pAchaLa tuM zuM joIne paDyo che ?" ema kaho ke, 'huM to vaDodarAno vakIla chuM'? e to rAjAne ya choDe nahIM. e to bheMsano bhAI kahevAya. praznakartA: paNa Ape to ApanI sAme trAguM karanArane namatuM nathI ApyuM. ene kIdhuM ke tArAM jevAM to keTalAMyane oTImAM ghAlI dauM. to e kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : keTalIka jagyAe to namatuM hau ApeluM che. namatuM eTalA ja mATe ke Ane bicArAMne, Ama karato karato raste caDhaze A. e to tAgAI kahevAya ! vakIlone ya evAM trAgAMvALo bhego thAya ne ! koI mANasa evo trAgAMvALo hoya ne, to vakIle ya kaheze, baLyuM AnAthI to chUTo ApaNe ahIMthI. pelAne zuM kaheze ? ke 'bhaI, tAro kesa laDhI ApIza. tuM phI nA ApIza.' eTale badhI jAtanA loka hoya. praznakartA : ghaNI vakhate amuka vakIlo ya trAguM kare che ke pahelA paisA Apo. pachI ja korTamAM Ubho rahIza, nahIM to nahIM. pAchuM evuM chellI ghaDIe kahI de ke atyAre paisA Apo to korTamAM jauM, nahIM to nahIM. dAdAzrI : nA, e trAguM nA kahevAya. e to sAmasAmI garajanI vAta che. praznakartA : e to ene phI apAI gayA, pachI ya vadhArenA paisA levA mATe kare. dAdAzrI : hA, te ya kare, to ya trAguM nA kahevAya. e nAgAI kahevAya. nAgAIvALAne jItI zakAya. bAkI, trAguM to tiryaMcagati oLaMge. vakIlo ya nANuM bole ne asIlo ya nANuM bole ke, "sAheba, meM tamane rUpiyA ApyA che, huM bhUlI nathI gayo. tame pAMca-sAta jaNa UbhA hatA ne, tyAre meM tamane ApelA." have AvuM vakIlane avaLuM coMTI paDe to vakIle ya zuM kare ? vakIle ya mANasa che ne ? 'AphaTara ola' e mANasa che ne ! zuM kare che ?! tAyaphAtI sAme ! amArA eka sagA hatA, te AvyA, eTale eka bene trAguM karavA mAMDyuM. eTale pelA bhAI, je amArAM sagA hatA ne, te gabharAI gayA. eya, eya Ama nA karAya." kahyuM, 'ema nahIM, e jarAka kUdI raheze. pachI ApaNe cA nirAMte pIe, hamaNe tuM jo to kharo. jovA jevuM che sarasa. kevuM sarasa lAge che A !' ATaluM kahyuM ke pelAM bena tarata baMdha

Page #45
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 39 thaI gayAM, ne kahe che, "mAro tAyapho karo cho ?" meM kahyuM, 'tAyapho karo cho eTale tAyapho ja joIe ne ! bIjuM zuM karIe ?! praznakartA : jo ame tAyaphAvALAne tAyapho kahIe to amane Dabala mAra paDe. dAdAzrI : evuM mAra paDe to tamAre tAyapho zabda nA bolavo. ApaNe pahelAM to jarA dhIme dhIme levuM paDe. meM ya pahelAM to dhIme dhIme lIdheluM, pachI kaThaNa karyuM. e ADuMavaLuM kahevA mAMDyA eTale pachI cAvI jozathI vAsavA mAMDI. jema pelA '' 'TAITa' karIe chIe ne, evuM. te narama paDI gayA pachI. tAyaphAthI to jagata ghaNuM kharuM bace che. paNa A trAgAthI to nA bace. A trAgAthI ja lokone bicArAne mArI nAkhyA che ! ane te keTalAMya lokone !! ane keTalAMka to puruSo hau trAgAM kare che. A rIte ya matabheda TALyo ! potAnuM dhAryuM nA thAya tyAre trAgAM kare. dhAryuM karAvavA mATe kare e trAguM kahevAya. potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavA mATe, bIjAM badhAM mANasone bivaDAvavA mATe tAgaDo racavo, enuM nAma trAguM. mAre tophAna, tophAna ! koI mANasa hRdayanA pocAM hoya, DhIlAM hoya te badhAM gabharAI jAya bicArAM ! ame eka dahADo trAguM karyuM hatuM. e vAsaNo badhAM, khAMDanA, cAnA DabbA, ghAsatelanA DabbA ne telanA DabbA badhuM pheMkApheMka kareluM. badho ragaDo karelo, oraDAmAM ragaDo ragaDo thaI gayo badho. praznakartA : dhAryuM karAvavA ? dAdAzrI : hA. AkhI jiMdagImAM eTaluM trAguM kareluM. ene trAguM kahevAya. dabAvI mAravA ! te ya pArakA sAruM, dharmane mATe karavuM paDeluM. mArA potAnA mATe kazuM kareluM nahIM. kAraNa ke hIrAbAne ame kahyuM ke, AvuM tamArAthI vartana nA karAya.' vAta evI hatI, amane "jJAna" thayA pachI mAmAnI poLamAM bicArI choDIo vidhio karavA Ave. te hIrAbAne to bicArAne kazo roga nahIM, bicArAM sarasa mANasa. paNa sAmA bAraNe bese ne, te pelAM bairAMoe badhAMe emane caDhAvelAM ke 'hAya hAya bApa, A badhI nAnI, nAnI choDIo dAdAne Ama page aDIne Taca kare che. bahAra badhuM khoTuM dekhAya. A te sAruM dekhAya ? dAdAjI sArA mANasa che, paNa A khoTuM dekhAya che. AmAM dAdAnI zI AbarU ?" loka jAtajAtanA Aropa kare, ane te AvuM ghAlI dIdhuM. te A hIrAbA bicArAM gabharAI gayelAM, ke A to ApaNI AbarU jAya che. Ama pote sArA mANasa, te lokoe nAkhyuM mahIM mIThuM. dUdhamAM mIThuM nAkhe to zuM thAya ? praznakartA : phATI jAya. dAdAzrI : te huM jANato hato ke A lokoe mIThuM nAkhavA mAMDyuM. che, te phATaze jyAre tyAre ! paNa meM rAha joyelI. paNa eka dahADo eka bena vidhi karatI hatI, te hIrAbAe paMjo vALatAM vALatAM bAraNuM Ama khakhaDAvyuM. koI dahADo e evuM kare nahIM. amAre tyAM gharamAM rivAja ja nahIM Avo. pelI choDI bhaDakIne jatI rahe eTalAM sAruM ja kareluM, mane bhaDakAvavA mATe nahIM. choDIo jANe ke hamaNAM hIrAbA vaDhaze. te choDI Ama vidhi karatI karatI dhrujI gaI. huM samajI gayo ke AnI pAchaLa cALA che. A cALA nA samajaNa paDe baLyA ? atyArano jevo bhoLo hoIza te dahADe ? pachI meM kahyuM, 'have tamAre ne ApaNe, bene juduM karI nAkhIe. A to nA poSAya. eTale have tame bhAdaraNa raho. ane tyAM tamAre rUpiyA pAMcaso-sAtaso jeTalAM joItA hoya eTalAM mahine mokalI Apaze. have ApaNe baMne bheguM rahevAnuM nahIM. tyAM caMdrakAMtabhAI, bhANAbhAI ema pAMca-cha jaNa beThA hatA. emane ya zIkhavAnuM maLe ne, ko'ka dahADo ! upadeza maLe ne !! hIrAbA pharI pAchA cA mUkavA mAMDyAM. te 'sTava" khakhaDAvyo haDahaDATa, te 'va' raDI UThe evo ! meM kahyuM, Aja khakhaDAmaNa cAlI che. ApaNe '' pheravo. nahIM to UMdhuM ja cAlyuM gADuM. te meM to mahIM jaI cAnA, khAMDanA, telanA, ghAsatelanA DabbA, badhA uparathI nIce pheMkyAM, badhuM pheMkApheMka karyuM, badhuM haDahaDATa. jANe 40 volTa pAvaranuM aDyuM ! badhAMno ragaDo karyo. sAmethI pelAM caDhAvavAvALAM bena

Page #46
AptavANI-9 41 AvyAM, AjubAjuthI ya badhAM AvyAM. temane meM kahyuM, 'A hIrAbA AvAM devI jevAM baI, emanAmAM 'poIjhana' koNe nAkhyuM ?" "bhaI, tamArAthI Avo krodha nA thAya. "jJAnI puruSa' cho tame." "jJAnI puruSa'no ja krodha jovA jevo che. juo to kharAM. pachI kahyuM, A mahIM nAkhyuM tyAre ja A dazA thaIne ?! zuM karavA AvuM nAkhyuM ? zuM bagADyuM che tamAruM ? tyAre e kahe, "bhaI, ame kazuM nathI nAkhyuM. ame vAta karI hatI eTalI ja." 'A zA sAru ? emanI jiMdagI kharAba karIne tame lokoe ?" tyAre e kahe, "zuM jiMdagI kharAba karI ?" meM kahyuM, 'have chUTuM rahevAnuM thayuM emane. have bhAdaraNa ApaNuM navuM makAna bAMdhyuM che, tenI mahIM hIrAbAe rahevAnuM. mahine kharca badho ApIzuM." tyAre e kahe, 'bhaI, evuM nA thAya, nA thAya evuM. A gheDe ghaDapaNa thatuM haze ?" meM kahyuM, "je mATalAne tirADa paDI, e mATaluM kAmamAM zuM lAge ? e to pANI jhame. pANI game eTaluM bharIe to ya bahAra nIkaLI jAya. mATalAne tirADa paDI hoya tene rakhAya ?' Ama kahyuM eTale pADozIo gabharAI gayA, 'AvuM bolo cho ?! mATalAne tirADa paDI gaI ?!" loka samajI gayo ke have hIrAbAne juduM rahevAnuM thavAnuM. hA, dharma upara Aphata nA AvavI joIe. te dahADe khAMDa-bAMDa, cA-bA, badhuM bheguM karI dIdhuM. paNa vItarAga bhAvamAM ! saheje peTamAM pANI hAlyA vagara !! caMdrakAMtabhAI, bhANAbhAI badhA beThA hatA. badhAne kahyuM, 'zIkhajo ghera." pachI bIje dahADe enuM phaLa zuM AvyuM ? pelAM pADozIo hIrAbAne UlaTAM samajaNa pADa pADa kare ke, 'bhAIne upAdhi thAya evuM nA karazo. koI Ave to cho Ave. ApaNe mAthAkUTamAM nA paDavuM.' UlaTAM have avaLuM zikhavADavA mAMDyA, kAraNa ke emanA manamAM bhaDaka pesI gaI ke have je kaMI thaze te ApaNAM mAthe ja AvavAnuM che. mATe ApaNe have cetatA rahevuM. meM karyuM hatuM ja evuM ke pharI A loko karatAM hoya to kho bhUlI jAya. pachI pharI evuM karavuM paDyuM nathI, pachI koI dahADo nahIM. eTalI davA karelI. haju yAda haze emane, e to emane ya cagyuM hatuM. koI dahADo cage nahIM, A pelAM lokoe zikhavADI rAkheluM badhuM, ke jarAka vadhAre karazo to choDI jatI raheze, pachI pesaze nahIM. ko'ka vakhata A 'jJAnI'no avatAra hoya ne bicArI choDIo 42 AptavANI-9 darzana karavA Ave ne ! ene azAMti rahe che tethI AvI che ne ! jaMpIne darzana to karavA do lokone. te eTale sudhI zikhavADeluM ke "dAdA paNa A choDIo joDe." evuM ya zikhavADayuM hatuM ke "A choDIo dAdAne laI jaze." are, evuM hotuM haze ? keTalA varSano, huM Doso thayelo mANasa, te kaI jAtanuM AvuM zikhavADeluM ! paNa emano zo doSa bicArAno ? hIrAbAne ema paNa samajAya ke A mArI bhUla che. A chokarIo satsaMgamAM AvatI hatI ne, paNa emane potAne so TakA khAtarI hatI ke A to morala ne sinsiyara che. paNa A to lokomAM khoTuM dekhAya, eTalA mATe 'tame choDI do A' kaheluM. tyAre kaMI choDyuM chuTe evuM che ? A to 'vyavasthita' ! ane e to aNasamajaNamAM bole. e to kaMI dahADo vaLato haze? ane A relavelAIna ukheDI nakhAya ? tyAre ApaNe rasto to karavo paDe. eTale pachI pelA bUcathI nA cAle. e to AMTAvALo bUca mAravo paDe. AMTAvALo bUca mArIe eTale pachI UkhaDI nA jAya ne ! praznakartA: peluM je nATaka karyuM e kapaTa nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA. emAM kapaTa nahIM. e to A dUdha UbharAtuM hoya ne lAkaDAM kADhI laIe e kaMI kapaTa nA kahevAya. dudhapAka UbharAto hoya to lAkaDAM kADhI laIe, e kapaTa kahevAya ? praznakartA : paNa Azaya to kaMI sAruM karavAno kharo ne ? dAdAzrI : emane cokhkhA karavAno. te ghaDIe badhAM beThAM hatAM, te sajjaDa thaI gayelAM. ane badhAM hoya tyAre ja AbarU lauM ema ne ema AbarU lauMe nahIM. nahIM to e gaLI jAya. kaheze "ohoho koI hatuM ja nahIM ne !' te gaLI jAya ne ApaNI mahenata nakAmI jAya. hIrAbAne anubhava, te e amane jANe ke sinsIyara ne morala che ja. e to pelA ekalAM kesamAM ja che te emanAM manamAM jarA pasI gayuM. te peluM kADhavuM muzkela paDyuM. ane te syAdvAda rIte nA nIkaLyuM, eTale A bIjI rIte kADhavuM paDyuM. paNa davA evI karI ke pharI hIrAbA kazuM karavA jAya tyAre kahe, 'e nA karazo. ApaNe bhaInAmAM paDavuM ja nahIM. bhaIno svabhAva bahu kaDaka che. Avo kaDaka svabhAva, te mahAdevajI ja joI

Page #47
AptavANI-9 43 lo ne !" eTalI badhI chApa pADI dIdhI. ne hIrAbA ya jANe, 'te hajI ya tIkhA bhamarA jevA che ? - e to 'jJAnI' thaIne besavuM saheluM nathI. koIne AvAM phaNagA phUTe to badhAM mULamAMthI kADhI nAkhe. nahIM to e phaNagA to moTAM jhADa thaI jAya ! juo ne pachI e 'kazuM bolavuM nahIM, tamAre kazuM bolavuM nahIM" ema hIrAbAne kahetAM. meM kahyuM, 'huM kazuM karavAno nathI. dAdAne koNa kazuM karavAnuM che ? A choDIo to zuM karavAnI hatI?" pachI e loko kahe che, "ApaNe nakAmo jhadhaDo vahorI levo. ApaNA mAthe Avaze.' meM to emane moDhe ja ThAlavyuM ke tame ja badhAMe bagADayuM, mATalAne tirADa paDI, have zuM karavAnuM ? A ATalo vakhata mATalAne lAkha karIzuM. bAkI pharI vArake lAkhe ya karavAnA nathI. pachI mUkI AvIzuM. tirADane lAkha karI dIdhI eka vakhata, ke sAMdho ApaNe ! praznakartA : emaNe peluM bAraNuM pachADayuM, sTava pachADayo, eTale e paNa ADAI kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : tyAre ADAI nahIM to bIjuM zuM ?! paNa e trAguM kahevAya. e nAnA prakAranuM trAguM kareluM. meM moTA prakAranuM trAguM karyuM. praznakartA eTale e nAnA prakAranA trAgA ne kADhI nAkhavA mATe sAme evo 'phorsa' mUkavo paDe ? dAdAzrI : hA, meM jANI - joIne trAguM kareluM ne emaNe emanAM karmanA niyamathI trAguM kareluM. A to jANI-bujhIne kare, ne huM to mArA jJAnamAM rahIne badhuM karuM ne ! badhA mahAtmAo pAMca-sAta-dasa jaNa beThelA. te eka kahe, 'AvuM badhuM karAtuM haze ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, 'zIkha, tane zIkhavADuM chuM. cUpa besa. A zIkhavADuM tane. ghera bIbI herAna karaze tyAre zI rIte karIza tuM ? praznakartA : Ape kahyuM ne, ke huM jJAnamAM rahIne karuM. e jJAna, kaI rIte jJAnamAM ? e tame kaho. dAdAzrI : jJAna ja - 'A' karyA kare, 'aMbAlAlabhAI' karyA kare. jJAna ja AptavANI-9 kaMI ochuM hIrAbAne paiNeluM che ?! juone, vagara matabheda varSa kADhyAM ne, paNa ?! atyAre ya matabheda paDatAM pahelAM uDADI daIe chIe. pharI 'jJAna' hau lIdhuM emaNe, hIrAbAe ! sapanAmAM dAdA AvyA pachI emane. bAkI, koInI joDe UMcA zvAse ame cALIsa varSathI nahIM rahelA. koInI joDe UMco avAja nahIM karelo. e to loko badhAM ya jANe. kahe ya kharAM ke e to bhagavAna jevA che ! traNuMe ya eka kaLA ! trAguM karavuM e kaLA che, bottera kaLAmAMthI eka kaLA che. praznakartA corI karavI e paNa eka kaLA che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, e paNa kaLA che. paNa A badhI kaLA, je kaLAo bhegI karI'tI ne, e badhI herAna kare potAne. praznakartA : trAgAM karavAnI kaLA kyAMthI zIkhatA haze ? dAdAzrI : AtmAnI badhI zakti che ! manamAM nakkI kare ke 'mAre dabaDAvIne A lokonI pAsethI paDAvI levuM che' eTale trAgAM karatAM AvaDI jAya. pachI zI rIte dabaDAvavuM e ene AvaDe. trAguM karavuM eTale to bahu ja akkala joIe. ApaNI akkala evI pahoMce nahIM. chatAM sAmo trAguM karatAM hoya to ene khoLI kADhe kharo. trAgAvALo mANasa sAmo Ave ne, te ya bahu kaMTALo Ave. praznakartA : trAguM kare e parakhAI jAya ? dAdAzrI : enAM karatAMnI sAthe ja samajI javuM ke trAguM AvyuM. A trAguM karavA mAMDyA ! tyAM samajaNapUrvaka cetelA ! amArA oLakhANavALAnuM eka chokaruM, te enI 'madhara' paravAre ke tarata bheMkaDo mele ! Ama dasa varSano hato. eka bAju mAre joDenI

Page #48
46 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 45 rUmamAM sUI javAnuM ane eka bAju pelo chokaro bheMkaDo mele. te roja pachI AvuM kare. pachI eka dahADo meM jaIne pelAne ekalo hato, tyAre be-cAra cUMTI khaNI lIdhI. eTale eNe bahu bUmAbUma karI, bheMkaDo vadhyo. tyAre enI mA kahe ke, "A rahyo, AvuM ne AvuM e roja pajave che." meM kahyuM ke, "nA, e nathI pajavato. A to juo ne, kevo sarasa avAja Ave che ! A to saMgIta che. sAMbhaLo, sAMbhaLo. badhAMne bolAvI lAvo." AvuM be-traNa dahADA sudhI karyuM, te pachI e baMdha thaI gayuM. kaMIka davA to karavI paDe ne ? Ama ne Ama kaMI cAle ? trAgAM karIne mANasane DarAvI de. are, eka ja trAgAvALo mANasa hoya, te so jaNane DarAvI de, dhULadhANI karI nAkhe. trAguM to chAtInAM pATiyAM besI jAya evA trAgAM kare. paNa huM to jJAnavALo ne, eTale mane jJAna hAjara thaI jAya ke A trAguM kare che. te dahADe jJAna nahIM ne, eTale A jJAna thatAM pahelAM paNa e cogaradamathI mApI kADhyuM ke zuM hetu che ne zAne mATe kare che A. e tarata khyAlamAM AvI jAya, tarata khabara paDe. huM to kahI dauM. 'besa besa. hamaNe cA pIe chIe." te emanAM manamAM je uchALo che ne, te UtarI rahe ane e ya gabharAya. ene traNe bhAre paDyuM ! amArA bhAIbaMdhane tyAM eka baI hatI, e emanI sagI thatI hatI ke pachI moTI bena thatI hatI. paNa eNe bhaIbaMdhane dabaDAvavA khAtara evuM kapaTa kareluM. bahArano koI mANasa emane ghera gayelo, tenI hAjarImAM pelI baI hAyavoya karIne kUTavA mAMDI. amAro bhaIbaMdha gabharAI gayo ane pelA navA AvelA bhAI paNa gabharAI gayA. pachI e bhaIbaMdha mane maLelo, eNe mane A vAta kahI. tyAre meM kahyuM ke, "tAre tyAM AvIza. evuM kaMI thavA kALe bhAMjagaDa paDI hoya to huM AvIza." pachI tyAM gayo. tyAre ya pelI baIe evo ja tAyapho karelo, trAgAM kare ! te baI Ama kUde ne pelo bhaI DaravA mAMDyo. tyAre meM pelI baIne kahyuM ke, 'tamane A majhA Ave che ? tame to bahu sarasa kUdo cho. are, kUdo ne, vadhAre. A to bahu majhA AvI !" AvuM-tevuM kahyuM, te pelI baI mane gALo bhAMDavA mAMDI ke 'tame ahIM mAre tyAM kema AvyA ?" eTale ame A badhAM kArastAna jANIe, AvI badhI cAvIo jANIe. trAguM karanAra thoDAka ja mANasa evAM hoya, koIka ja mANasa hoya. emAM puruSomAM 'Tu parasenTa" ja mANasa hoya, vadhAre nA hoya. jyAre strIomAM 'Tena parasenTa' hoya. strIomAM vadhAre hoya. trAguM zabdano artha nIkaLyo ne ! e bahu jUnA jamAnAmAM lokone AvaDe. have trAguM to mane lAge che, AjanAM chokarAMone AvaDatAM nathI hotAM. trAgAM zI rIte AvaDe ? AmanAM to hADe ya evAM majabUta nathI !! trAgAvALAne to bahu majabUta hADa ! A to jarAka khakhaDeluM dekhAya ke Ama bhaDakI jAya. prakRtimAM ja vaNAyeluM ! praznakartA : e trAguM karanArane potAne khabara paDe kharI ke A huM trAguM karuM chuM ? dAdAzrI : cokkasa ! trAguM karavuM eTale ja pote potAnI icchApUrvaka karavuM. paNa e prakRtimAM vaNAI gayeluM ne, eTale pote dhyAna nA Ape. paNa badhI ja khabara paDe. kema nA khabara paDe ? nAnAmAM nAnI bAbata samajI zake, to trAguM e to bahu moTI bAbata kahevAya. gAMvALAthI cetatA rahIe ! eka bena trAgAMvALA hatA ne, te ene mArI pAse trAguM karavA mAMDyuM. ane Ama e bena mArAM murabbI hatAM. te huM to emane gAMDyo nahIM. pachI mane kahe che, 'tame ekalA ja mane gAMThatA nathI." meM kahyuM, 'tamane gAMThato nathI evuM nahIM. Izvarane ya gAMDyo nathI." kAraNa ke e bena trAgAM kare, te tarata mane samajAI jAya ke A trAguM karavA mAMDyuM ! trAguM eTale sAmAne bivaDAvI mAravuM. A to atyAre jJAnI thayA. bAkI, pahelAM to ahaMkAra kharo ne ! tyAre kahyuM ke, "mAthuM mArane joIe. mAthuM phoDa, heMDa. mane bivaDAvavA phare che ?! AkhA jagatane bivaDAvIne

Page #49
AptavANI-9 47 huM upara beTho chuM !" AkhI duniyAnAM trAgA UtAruM evo mANasa chuM, jAdugara chuM, huM to ! trAgAvALA mANasa che te ApaNane AgaLa vadhavA nA de. trAguM karavuM eTale bahu moTuM dabANa karavuM. huM to eka bhAIne tyAM beTho hato. tyAM bIjo eka bhAI Avyo, te Amane dabaDAvavA mATe zuM karavA mAMDyo ? ke jamIna upara mAthuM athADayuM Ama. meM kahyuM, 'kema bhaI, zuM che, zuM che ?" tyAre A bhAI mane kahe che ke, 'juo ne, A AvuM kare che. mane bivaDAvI de che." suMvALI prakRti hoya ne, to bI jAya. sahI nA karI Apato hoya ne pelo trAguM kare to bI jAya, te sahI karI Ape. kaheze, 'lAva tyAre sahI karI ApuM." eTale trAguM karanAro Ama bhIMta joDe ya mAthuM aphADe. have puruSomAM kharAba guNa kayo ? trAgAno. je puruSa trAguM karato hoya ne, e mANasano saMbaMdha nA rAkhavo. strIo to trAguM kare, paNa keTalAka puruSo ya trAguM karatA hoya che. praznakartA: puruSamAM kharAba guNa trAgAno kahyo. ane evo hoya to tyAM UbhuM nA rahevAya ? dAdAzrI : nA UbhuM rahevAya. e ApaNane hau DarAvI mAre. ApaNe hau DarI jaIe. praznakartA : evo trAgAvALo puruSa hoya to tyAMthI chaTakI kevI rIte javAnuM ? dAdAzrI : trAgAvALI strI joDe chaTakI kevI rIte javAya, te mane khabara che. trAgAvALA puruSa joDe chaTakavAnuM mane khabara nathI. strI trAgA kare to huM kudADa kubADa karuM, te AkhI rAta kudADuM. paNa puruSanAM trAgAM AgaLa to huM ye camakI jauM chuM. trAguM eTale badhAnI IcchA nA hoya ne e vastu bhogavI levI hoya to mAra tophAna kare. 'huM ApaghAta karuM chuM, ne huM Ama karuM chuM ne tema karuM chuM' mAra dabaDAvIne paNa bhogavI le. koIpaNa jAtanuM trAguM kare A, bivaDAvI mAre. evAM puruSo hoya che pAchAM. AptavANI-9 praznakartA : koI puruSa trAguM kare ke "bhAgI jaIza, huM ApaghAta karIza, huM Ama karIza." to kharekhara evuM mAnI levAnuM ke e karaze ja ? e kare kharo ? dAdAzrI : gabharAvuM nahIM. paNa cetatA rahevuM paDe pAchuM. vakhate e to eme ya karI nAkhe pAchuM. ghaNuM kharuM to trAguM hoya che, eTale evuM kare nahIM. paNa to ya cetatA rahevuM sAruM. saMsAra vyavahAramAM trAgAvALA bahu mANasa hoya. vyavahAramAM eTale ApaNA gharamAM, te evAM trAgAvALAnI to vAta aDavA ja nA dezo. nahIM to mAryA gayA jANajo. AkhI jiMdagI huM to trAgAMthI bacyo chuM. mArI pAse eka evI 'sisTama" hatI, tethI huM trAgAMthI kAyama bacI jato hato. ghaNo kharo bhAga to, jagata to trAgAMthI ja dabAI gayeluM che ! praznakartA: sAmI vyakti trAgAM game eTalA kare to pote emAM kevI rIte rahevAnuM? dAdAzrI : potAne emAM zuM karavAnuM ? joyA karavAnuM. e trAguM karato hoya ne, to ApaNane navuM nATaka jovA maLyuM. nahIM to AvuM nATaka to jovA maLatuM nathI ! ApaNe e nATakavALAne kahIe trAgAM karo, te kaMI kare ?! eTale ApaNe e trAgAM karanArAne kahIe, tAre jeTalAM trAgAM karavA hoya eTalAM karane ! bacavAtuM "eDajasTamenTa' ! ame trAgAM bahu nahIM joyelAM. paNa jeTalAM joyAM enAthI trAsa pAmI gayelA. praznakartA : to koI tamArI joDe trAguM kare to tamane zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : huM tarata samajI jAuM ke A trAguM karavA mAMDyuM che. praznakartA : tyAre zuM karo tame ? dAdAzrI : huM to trAgAvALAne gAMThuM nahIM. tame badhAM thaIne trAgAM

Page #50
50 AptavANI-9 parama vinaya hoya to ja tyAM dAdA khuza ! ApaNe to sAmAne pAcho pheravavA mATe AvyA chIe. mAre duniyAmAM kazuM joItuM nathI. A to kyAMya UMdhe raste cAlyo jAya che ne tenAM ATalAM badhAM duHkho paDe che. UMdhe raste cAlavAnuM ne pAchAM javAbadArI le che ! duHkha nA paDatAM hoya to to vAta judI che. sukha paDIne UMdhe raste jato hoya to vAta judI che. A to duHkha ATalAM sahana kare che ne UMdhe rastenI javAbadArI le che. eTale amane kaSNA Ave che ke A kyAM tuM UMdhe raste cAlyo jAya che ! AptavANI-9 49 karo to ya huM ekalo besI rahuM ahIMyA ! tame thAko, paNa huM nA thAkuM. eno 'eksarTa' thaI gayelo huM ! praznakartA : ahIM aMdara zuM 'eDajasTamenTa' lo tame ? dAdAzrI : asaramukta ! "anIphekTiva' !! e chone trAgAM kare, e thAkIne sUI jAya nirAMte ! praznakartA : paNa pelo sAmo vadhAre trAguM kare ne, dAdA ? ApaNane anUIphekTiva jue eTale 'IphekTa' karAvavA sAmo vadhAre trAguM kare ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, te mAruM vadhAre 'anUIphekTiva' thatuM jAya. eTaluM amArAmAM baLa che. ame 'IphekTa' kyAM AgaLa chUTI mUkIe ? ke enI mAgaNI paddhatisaranI hoya, enI lAgaNI paddhatisaranI hoya to chUTI mUkIe. paNa jo kadI DarAvI mAravA mAge to nahIM, mane DarAve che ? bhagavAna paNa mane DarAvI zakato nathI. tane zarama nathI AvatI ? bhagavAna jene vaza thayo che, tene DarAvavA phare che ? amArI pAse koI koI trAgAM kare, paNa te thoDuM nAnuM amathuM. praznakartA : tyAre tame dAdA, moDhe kazuM bolo nahIM ? ene kazuM kaho nahIM ne 'anUIphekTiva' thaIne besI raho ?!. dAdAzrI : to zuM kare tyAre ? trAgAMvALAne zuM kahevuM ? praznakartA : e ya samajI jAyane, ke ahIM kazuM pahoMcatuM nathI, asara thatI nathI Amane ? dAdAzrI : badhuM samajI jAya. A 'dAdo' bahu pAko mANasa che. nahIM to AvaDo moTo saMgha calAvI le ? calAvI zake ?! nahIM to roja vaDhavADo thAya. paNa A to kAyadA vagara, vagara kAyade juo ne ! 'no laoN-laoN !" cAle ja che ne paNa !! parama vinayamAM nA dekhIe eTale amArI AMkha saheja enA tarapha kaDaka rahe ane vinayamAM nA dekhIe eTale kADhI mUkIe. 'geTa AuTa,' geTa AuTa" evuM nahIM karavAnuM pAchuM. e duzamana thAya evuM nahIM karavAnuM. dhIme rahIne karavAnuM, te vinayamAM, jo

Page #51
[2]. udvega : zaMkA : noMdha udveganI sAme ! bAkI, mokSe javuM hoya to saraLa thaI jAva, bALaka jevAM saraLa thaI jAva. A bALaka to aNasamajaNamAM kare che ane 'jJAnI puruSa' samajaNamAM kare che, basa ! beumAM bALakapaNuM kharuM, nirdoSatA bALaka jevI. bALaka nathI samajatuM to ya eno saMsAra cAle che ke nathI cAlato ? sAro cAle UlaTo. jema jema samajaNa AvI, ema eno saMsAra bagaDato cAle. eTale 'jJAnI puruSa' to bALaka jevAM saraLa hoya. ane A ADAI to eka jAtano ahaMkAra che ke saraLa thavuM nathI, mAruM dhAryuM karAvavuM che. ADAI e dhAryuM karAvavAnuM pariNAma che. pArakAnAM dhAryA pramANe jene karavuM che, ene ADAIo jatI rahe badhI. praznakartA : pote je dhArato hoya e pramANe thAya nahIM, eTale udvega thaI ja jAya. potAnuM dhAryuM pariNAma nA Ave eTale udvegamAM ja rahe e. dAdAzrI : dhAryuM thAya ja nahIM koI dahADo ya. eTale ApaNe pAsAM nAkhatAM pahelAM ja manamAM vicAra karavo ke UMdhA paDajo. pachI jeTalAM chatA paDyA eTalA sAcA. paNa ApaNe kahIe ke cAreva chatA paDajo. to te dahADo vaLe nahIM ne AkhuM guMcAmaNa ne udviga thAya. enAM karatAM cAreva AptavANI-9 UMdhA paDajo ema kahIe ne, te jeTalAM chatA nIkaLyA eTalA to sAcA. eka chato nIkaLyo tyAre ApaNe jANIe ke eka to phAvyA. eTale "eDajasTamenTa' goThavavAnI kiMmata che badhI. praznakartA : e vAta to dAdA, so TakA ke A akramajJAna hoya to ja 'eDajasTamenTa' thAya. nahIM to 'eDajasTamenTa' zakya ja nathI. dAdAzrI : hA, nahIM to thAya ja nahIM ne ! 'eDajasTamenTa' rahe ja nahIM, kayA AdhAre Take ? enuM 'eDajasTamenTa' ja uDAvI mUkIne tyAM ya udvegathI mAthuM toDI nAkhe. pachI moDhAM para divela Akho dahADo laIne pharyA kare. praznakartA : paNa pAsAM nAkhatI vakhate UMdhA paDajo ema je kahyuM ne, to evo Azaya zuM karavA rAkhIe ke UMdhA ja paDajo ? dAdAzrI : to zuM rAkhavuM ApaNe ? praznakartA H Azaya ja nahIM rAkhavo. je paDe e kharA, evuM rAkho. dAdAzrI : "je paDe e kharA" evuM jo kadI ApaNuM mana kabUla karatuM hoya to sArI vAta che. ne te ya pAchuM saMtoSane nA pAmatuM hoya tyAre ApaNe kahIe ke UMdhA paDajo. to pachI be chatA paDe eTale mana saMtoSamAM AvI jAya. eTale ApaNuM mana kaI jAtanuM che, enI upara AdhAra rAkhe che. dhAraNA tahIM, to udvega nahIM ! ahIMthI muMbaI phona upara vAta karIne sodo maMjUra karyo, badhuM thayuM ane be dahADA pachI pelo mANasa pharI gayo eTale ApaNane udvega thAya ne pelAne nA thAya. alyA, ApaNane zAno udvega thAya te ? ApaNe to dharmamAM rahyA chIe. pharI to e gayo, te e adharmamAM peTho. ApaNe to avaLuM kazuM karyuM ja nathI, to ApaNane zAno udvega thAya ? tyAre e kahe, 'paNa mAre napho jato rahyo ne !' alyA, napho to kyAM Avyo hato, mela ne chAla ahIMthI. sodo ja nahoto karyo ema mAna ne, paNa A ene udvega Ubho kare. ane temAM gharanA mANasa kahe, 'kema Ama thaI gayA cho,

Page #52
AptavANI-9 53 kema Ama thaI gayA cho ?" paNa zuM thAya ? jo udvega, udvega, udvega, udvega ! je vega nIce javo joIe te vega UMce caDhyo. sodo karyA pachI pelAe nA kahyuM, temAM zuM bagaDI gayuM ? sodo nahoto karyo mAnIe. paNa jo udvega, udvega, udvega ! ane A loko zuM kare che ? eka khoTa jAya tyAre be khoTo UbhI kare che. ane 'jJAnI puruSa' eka ja khoTa javA de. praznakartA : A udvega thAya che, e mohane kAraNe ja che ne ? dAdAzrI : A dasa hajAra gayA. te eno moha enI pAchaLa. eka khoTa to gaI, e to gaI. have enI Dakhala zuM karavA kare che ?! A lamaNe lakhelI eka ja khoTa hatI. paNa bIjI khoTa zuM karavA khAdhI te ? eka khoTa khAvI sArI ke be ? eka ja. paNa te badhA ya be khoTa khAya che. te pachI evAM ne evAM AvatAM bhavanAM karma bAMdhe pAchAM. eka kSaNa paNa udvegamAM kema rahevAya ? udvega to keTalAM karma baMdhAvaDAve. eka kSaNavAra udvegamAM ame rahelAM nahIM koI dahADo, A 'jJAna' thayuM tyArathI. vega, Avega te udvega ! praznakartA : vega, Avega ane udvega e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : vega sAhajika vastu che ane Avega asahaja che. pote kartA thaIne 'Avega' thAya che ! ane udvega to potAne na karavuM hoya to ya thAya. potAnI IcchA nA hoya to ya udvega thAya, ne te udvega mAthuM phADI nAkhe evo udvega thAya. mAthuM phATuM phATuM thaI rahyuM hoya. vega to jJAnIone ya hoya, Avega nA hoya ane udvega to hoya ja nahIM ne ! jyAM sudhI AvegavALo che, tyAM sudhI udvega kyAre Ubho thaze e kahevAya nahIM. hA, AveganI gerahAjarI thaI ke udvega gayo. kartApadanuM bhAna tUTyuM ke udvega nahIM thAya. chatAM udvega e ya hisAba che. paNa kartApadanuM bhAna tUTyuM to e udvegano hisAba je bhogavavAno che, te AptavANI-9 udvegarUpe nahIM Ave. bIjI rIte AvIne gUMcavIne jato rahe. 'saphokezana' kare khAlI, gUMgaLAmaNa kare. 54 eka jaNa mane kahe che, 'dAdA' mAthuM phATuM phATuM thaI rahyuM che.' e ja udvega. zuM thAya te ? paNa alyA, mAthuM te phATatuM haze ? A khoparI to nathI phATe evI, hathoDo mArIe to ya nathI phATe evI. paNa jo udveganI muzkelIo ! udvega evo Ave ne, te mahIM naso tUTI jAya. have e vepAra nathI karato chatAM enI meLe thaI jAya, nathI karavo to ya thaI jAya. kAraNa ke AveganA vepArIo hoya tyAM AgaLa udvega avazya AvavAno. te ApaNuM 'jJAna' ApyA pachI AveganA vepAra baMdha thaI jAya che, eTale udvega AvavAno nahIM. praznakartA : paNa e udvega to pUrvajanmonI kamANI laIne Avyo hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, e badhI kamANI pachI bhogavavAnI jarA. te udveganI kamANI bhogavavAnI majhA(!)ya bahu Ave ne ?! praznakartA : krodha joDe udvegane saMbaMdha kharo ? dAdAzrI : hA, krodha hoya to ja udvega thAya ne ! Avege ya krodha hoya to ja thAya. eTale jyAM sudhI kartA che tyAM sudhI krodha-mAna-mAyAlobha che, ne tyAM sudhI loko kAma karyA karatAM hoya. paNa te pramANamAM hoya tyAre e Avega kahevAya ane potAnI zaktinI bahAra thaI jAya tyAre udvega kahevAya. praznakartA : udvega Ave tyAre sabhAnapaNe jo jApa karIe to phera paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : udvega Ave tyAre sabhAnapaNuM hoya paNa nahIM ne ! e bahu nAnA prakArano udvega Ave to vaLI thoDuM ghaNuM sabhAnapaNuM rahe, to jApa karIne baMdha thaI jAya. paNa peluM moTA prakAranuM Ave to to tyAM AgaLa sabhAnapaNu rahe ja nahIM ne !

Page #53
AptavANI-9 tamane A traNa zabdo samajAyA 'ejhekTa', enI jagyA upara ? praznakartA : A traNa zabdo para koI 'pI.eca.DI.' vALAe AkhuM pustaka lakheluM hoya ne e vAMcyuM hota to ya nA samaja paData, ne A ApanA kahevAthI samaja paDI gaI. dAdAzrI : eTale A zabdo enI jagyA upara zobhAyamAna thAya to ja e zabdano artha maLe, nahIM to maLe nahIM. enI jagyA upara zobhAyamAna thavo joIe. vegane udvega upara besADIe to zuM thAya ? bIjI jagyA upara zobhAyamAna thAya paNa nahIM e vastu. ApaNA loko zabdo jematema bole che, zobhAyamAna thAya ke nA thAya, enI kaMI paDelI ja nathI ne ! A luccA mANaso enI jagyA para zobhe. gajavAM kApanAra enI jagyA para zobhe ane hIrAnA vepArI enI jagyA para zobhe. nahIM to gajavAM kApanArA joDe hIrAnA vepArI Ave to zobhe ke ? cogaradamathI kApI le. eTale sahu sahunI jagyA upara zobhI rahyuM che. ApaNA loka raMDApAno tiraskAra kare che. alyA, e raMDApo zabda enI jagyA upara zobhI rahyo che. maMDApo ane raMDApo beu 'ekkekTa' ja che. udvega, keTalI badhI muzkelI ! praznakartA : matabhedane kAraNe ya udvega to thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. matabhedathI ya udvega thAya. 'eksesa' badhuM thaI jAya tyAra pachI udvega zarU thaI jAya. enI hadathI pelI bAju thAya tyAre. A mANasa charI mAre chene, cappa mAre chene, e udvega thAya che tyAre mAre che. praznakartA : udvega eTale ajaMpo kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : ajaMpo to bahu sAro. ajaMpo to, pyAlo paDI jAya to ya ajaMpo thAya. ajaMpo to saraLa kahevAya. udvega to mAthAmAM jhATakA lAgatA hoya evuM lAge. ane A ajaMpo to pyAlA paDI jAya eTale ajaMpo ne kaDhApo thayA kare. A to bahu moTuM jokhama thayuM hoya tyAre AptavANI-9 udvega thAya. 'Imozanala' thayo ke udvega zarU thaI jAya. udvega to ene UMghavA ya nA de ne ! praznakartA : paNa 'imozansa' lokone to ciMtA vadhAre thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : ciMtA nahIM, udvega bahu thAya. ane e udvega to marI javA jevo lAge. 'mozana' eTale vegamAM ane 'imozanala' eTale udvega. praznakartA : have vega e paNa gatimAM che ne ? dAdAzrI : vega to niraMtara hovo ja joIe. vega, 'mozana' to hovuM ja joIe. jIvatAne vega avazya hoya, ne te 'mozana'mAM hoya. koI paNa jIvane vega avazya hoya. je trasta jIva che, eTale je Ama trAse che, A hAtha aDADIe to nAsI jAya che, bhAgI jAya che, jene bhaya lAge che, e badhAne vega avazya hoya, paNa je ekendrIya jIvo che, A jhADapAna che, tene vega nA hoya. emano vega judI jAtano hoya. paNa A vega to bIjAM badhAM jIvone hoya ja. te vegamAM to hoya ja, niraMtara 'mozana'mAM, ne e badhA vegane AghopAcho karyo eTale A 'Imozanla' thaI jAya, e udvega kahevAya. A gADI 'imozanla' thAya to zuM thAya ? praznakartA : nukasAna thAya. 'eksiDanTa' thAya ne loko marI jAya. dAdAzrI : evuM A dehamAM ya badhAM mahIM jIvo marI jAya che. tenI jokhamadArI ane pachI potAnA udveganI upAdhi thAya, te bIjI jokhamadArI. uga kevo hoya ? ke ahIMthI pATA upara paDatuM naMkhAve, nadImAM paDatuM naMkhAve, nahIM to bIjuM kazuM pI le. udvega eTale vega UMce caDhyo, ahIM magajamAM caDhI jAya ane pachI paDatuM nAkhe. nahIM to mAMkaNa mAravAnI davA khAlI karI nAkhe. "alyA, zIzI khAlI karI ?" tyAre e kahe, 'hA, huM pI gayo." udvegavALo mANasa bace nahIM. are, udvega thAya tyAre to darzana karavA ahIM nA AvavA de. udvega vastu to bahu moTI che. badhAe kaMI

Page #54
AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : nA, abhimAnathI udvega thatAM nathI. udvega karAvanArI bIjI eka vastu che. A ahIM atyAre 'lAITa' 'DIma' hoya ane ahIM ja badhAne suI javAnuM hoya. have tame ahIMthI eka nAno sApa pesI jato joyo, bIjA koIe joyo nahIM. have badhAne sUI javAnuM, te nA joyo hoya te AkhI rAta nirAMte UMghI jAya ne ? AptavANI-9 57 uga joyo ja nA hoya. A 'jJAna' che eTale nirjarA rUpe badhuM jatuM raheze. eTale e udvegane kahIe ke "jeTalAM AvavA hoya eTalAM Avo. haju zarIra sAruM che tyAM sudhI Avo. pachI paiDapaNamAM nA Avazo." atyAre to zakti che te haju AvavuM hoya to Avo, te dhakkA mArIne ya kADhI melAya atyAre. e paribaLothI khasI jAva ! praznakartA : to A udvegano upAya zo ? dAdAzrI : eno upAya to, e zenA nimitte udvega thAya che e khoLI kADhavuM paDe. koI mANasa nukasAna karyA karato hoya ane e mANasa sAMbhare to uga thAya ene. to e udvega thAya evI jagyAethI khasI javuM joIe. agara to uga thAya e vastu sAva sonAnI hoya to ya pheMkI devI. e ApaNI sagI nhoya. uga karAvatI Ave che, te ApaNI rIleTiva' nhoya. zAMti ApatI Ave e ja sAcuM. saheja paNa udvega thAya e mokSano mArga nathI. vegamAM ja rahevuM joIe, 'mozana'mAM ja. vakhate je koI uga karAvanArI vastu hoya ne, ke eka chokaro nA kamAto hoya, to ApaNe jANIe ke A uga karAvanArI vastu che. to ApaNe enI joDeno vyavahAra e saMbaMdhI baMdha karI devo, paisA saMbaMdhI vyavahAra baMdha karI devo. enI sAthe 'bhaI, kema che ? phalANuM kema che ?" evI vAtacIta karavI. tamane samaja paDI ne ? praznakartA : je vastuthI uga thAya e vastu choDI devI, paNa uga e 'rIleTiva' bhAga che. enA saMjoga bhegA thAya eTale udvega thayA vagara rahe nahIM. dAdAzrI : hA, udvega thayA vagara rahe nahIM. paNa e zuM kAraNathI udvega che, e velAne enuM mULa hoya che pAchuM. eTale udvegane mATe zuM karavuM paDe ? mULamAMthI ja kADhI nAkhavuM paDe. buddhi ja lAve udvega ! praznakartA : ahambhAva, abhimAna, e rAkhavAthI A badhuM udvega thAya che ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : ane jonArAne ? praznakartA : UMgha nA Ave. dAdAzrI : enuM zuM kAraNa ? sApa mahIM pesI gayAnuM ene jJAna thayuM che. ane sApa peThAnuM pelA lokone jJAna nathI, tethI emane UMgha Ave che. have tamane UMgha kyAre Ave ? sApa nIkaLyAnuM pAchuM jJAna thAya tyAre tamane UMgha Ave. have Ano pAra kyAre Ave ? A badhuM tethI 'imozanala' thaI jAya che. e buddhi 'imozanala' kare che. aham to nathI karato. aham to bicAro bahu sAro che. A badhAM kArastAna buddhinAM che. eTale buddhi ja herAna kare che, e ja udvega lAve che. vegamAMthI ugamAM lAve che. jete udvega thAya, te "pote' hoya ! praznakartA: paNa hajI amArAmAMya udvegabhAva pAcho pragaTa thayA kare che ne ? dAdAzrI : udvega thAya ane vegeya thAya, beu thAya. paNa 'caMdubhAIne thAya. 'tamane' nA thAya. 'tamane' khabara paDe ke 'caMdubhAIne udvega thayo. jo 'caMdubhAI"e udvegano vepAra karyo hoya to udvega thAya. nahIM to Avega Ave, nahIM to vega Ave. tenI khabara paDe badhI. praznakartA : paNa ugamAM phasAyelA rahIe chIe ne ! dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. phasAyelA to, tame tamArI jAtane phasAyelA mAno cho ke "caMdubhAI' phasAyelo lAge che ?

Page #55
AptavANI-9 eTale buddhi ja herAna kare che. e ja uga lAve che, vegamAMthI ugamAM lAve che. amArAmAM to buddhi bilakule ya jatI rahIne, tyAre mane ThaMDaka vaLI. tethI meM pustakamAM lakhyuM che ke, huM abudha chuM. A to sarasa vizeSaNa kahevAya ne ! meM joyuM ke koI A vizeSaNa levA taiyAra paNa nathI. ApaNe kahIe, 'tamane abudhanuM vizeSaNa ApIe." to kaheze, 'nA sAheba, mane vadhu buddhi joIe.' amane to abudhanuM vizeSaNa maLyuM, te 'imozanla ja nA thAya ne ! jyAre juo tyAre "mozana'mAM' ja hoya. zaMkAnuM mULa ! praznakartA : paNa vadhu buddhi joIe, kahe che tyAre e vadhu buddhizALI lokone ja vadhAre zaMkA hoya ne ? AptavANI-9 praznakartA paNa 'caMdubhAI' phasAyelo rahe che ne ? dAdAzrI : e to phasAyelA hoya. temAM ApaNe zuM che ? e to jeTaluM DiscArja che e to thayA vagara chUTako ja nathI. emAM cAle ja nahIM ne ! ApaNI jAta upara nA AvavuM joIe ke huM phasAyo. kAraNa ke zuddhAtmA e zuddhAtmA ja che. ene kazuM aDe nahIM, enuM nAma zuddhAtmA. praznakartA: paNa ema dekhAya ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM" chatAM ya 'caMdubhAI" AvA ne AvA rahyA. dAdAzrI : je rahyA che te ja karmano nikAla thAya che. lokone dAna ApatA hoya to tame kaho ke "caMdubhAI bahu sArA che', e ya che te "e" che. ane AvuM uga kare che te ya "e" che. beu eka ja che, eka ja svabhAvI che. kaDavA upara tiraskAra che ane mIThA upara jarA rAga che, e manuSyano svabhAva che. bhagavAne beune eka ja svabhAvI kahyuM. zrImada rAjacaMdra kahyuM ke, rajakaNa ke riddhi vaimAnika devanI, sarve mAnyA pudgala eka svabhAva jo. eka ja svabhAvanuM pudgala che. kasAI ne dAnezvarI beu che te pudgala che. kasAI upara jene cIDha caDhatI nathI ane dAnezvarI para rAga thato nathI, e vItarAga ! praznakartA : tame bahAranA ekeya 'sTezana' para rahevAnI jagyA nathI rahevA devAnA. dAdAzrI : paNa bahAranA "sTezana para rahezo to mAra khAzo. ATalAM vakhata to mAra khAdho, vaLI pAcho mAra khAvo che ? eTale mAra nA khAvAnI jagyA ame batADIe chIe, jyAM kyAreya mAra nA khAvo paDe. atyAra sudhI mAra ja khAdhA che ne ! tame "jJAna" letAM pahelAM mAra nahIM khAdhelA ? thoDA ghaNA khAdhelA ? bAkI, badhAne mAra khA khA karIne dama nIkaLI gayelo. dAdAzrI : hA. e to evuM che ne, atyAre to viparIta buddhinI asara che. te viparIta buddhi zaMkAo badhI bahu pADyA kare. bhayaMkara ajJAnatA, enuM nAma zaMkA. ene cogaradamanA pAsA maLyA nahIM, enAthI 'solva' nA thayuM, eTale e zaMkAmAM paDyo. 'solva" thAya to e zaMkAmAM nA paDe. buddhi laDhAvI jue ne buddhine AgaLa javAno rasto nA jaDe ke zaMkA UbhI kare. A 'vyavasthita' samajAI jAya to kazI ja zaMkA utpanna nA thAya. praznakartA : to zaMkAnuM mULa zuM ? zaMkA kema AvatI haze ? dAdAzrI : zaMkA e buddhino Dakho che, vadhu paDatI buddhino Dakho che e. eTale zaMkA utpanna karanArI buddhi, badhuM UMdhuM dekhADe. e zaMkA UbhI kare, anarthakAraka ! jagatamAM badhA anarthanuM moTAmAM moTuM mULa hoya to zaMkA, e pachI vahema enI aMdara AvI jAya. pahelo vahema paDe. buddhi ane vahema pADe. eTale zaMkA e badhuM buddhinuM ja pradarzana che. ethI ApaNe tyAM to huM eka ja kahuM chuM ke zaMkA koI jAtanI rAkhazo ja nahIM. ne zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM jagatamAM khAsa kAraNa che ya nahIM. eTale zaMkAnuM mULa buddhi che. praznakartA : paNa A buddhi to sAruM dekhADe ne kharAbe ya dekhADe. dAdAzrI : nA. jene jarUriyAta jeTalI ja buddhi che, potAnI

Page #56
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 vizvAsa nA Ave, saMzaya thayA kare. potAne dhIravuM hoya ane pelA devAdAro para saMzaya thayA kare, to e mANasa marelo ja che. ahIM choDIo kolejamAM jatI hoya, to "phAdhara'manamAM thAya ke 'uMmaralAyaka thaI, have A choDIo zuM karatI haze ? e zuM kare che ? koNa mitra kare che ?" ema saMzaya karyA ja kare. te marI gayelo ja che ne ! saMzaya to kAmano ja nahIM. saMzaya to, A cappa laIne mAravA jatAM haze, ene jarA ya saMzaya nA hoya tyAre to e mAravA jAya ! ane maranArAne ya jarAya saMzaya nA hoya tyAre mare. paNa e eka ja vakhata mare ane A saMzayAtmA, e kAyamane mATe marelo ja che. 'nesesiTI' pUratI buddhi che, ene pAMca choDIo hoya to ya paNa e vicAra ja Ave nahIM, vicAra Ave to zaMkA Ave ne ? praznakartA : eTale vadhAre buddhi hoya to ja A Dakhala thAya ? dAdAzrI : vadhAre buddhi ja A Dakhala kare. kAraNa ke A kALanI buddhi viparIta gaNAya che, vyabhicAriNI buddhi kahevAya che, eTale pachI mAra ja khavaDAva khavaDAva kare. praznakartA ane jarUra pUratI buddhivALAne vicAra ja nA Ave, ema ? dAdAzrI : hA. jarUra pUratI buddhivALA keTalAMka hindustAnamAM hoya che ke ene pachI bIjo vicAra ja nA Ave. akkalavALA eTale vadhu vicAravALA, vadhu buddhivALA. akkalavALA para amane ema thAya ne, ke mAra keTalo khAIza tuM te ? eTale jayAre kaMIka duHkha bhogavavAnuM thAya, kharekharuM duHkha bhogavavAnuM thAya tyAre zaMkA utpanna thAya. saMzayAtmA vinazyati ! praznakartA : gItAmAM kahyuM che ke "saMzayAtmA vinazyati." to temAM AtmAsaMbaMdhI saMzaya thAya ke bIjo koI saMzaya thAya ? dAdAzrI : saMzaya badhAne hoya. emAM saMzaya vagarano koI mANasa hoya nahIM. ene to A jagatamAM koI jagyAe vizvAsa ja nA bese. saMzaya ja thayA kare ane saMzayathI e marI jAya, marelo ja che ne ! praznakartA : vyavahAramAM saMzaya ke nizcayamAM saMzaya ? kayo saMzaya ? zaMkA judI, jijJAsA judI ! praznakartA : zaMkA ane jijJAsA, e bemAM phera zuM ? dAdAzrI : zaMkAne ane jijJAsAne zuM levAdevA? zaMkA ne jijJAsA, e be kuTuMbI to nahIM, paNa pitarAI ye nA thAya. praznakartA : A vaijJAniko che, te loko zodhakhoLa kare, temAM pote zaMkA rAkhIne ja AgaLa vadhe. dAdAzrI : koI evo vaijJAnika pAkyo nathI ke je zaMkAmAM eka miniTathI vadhAre Utare. nahIM to e vijJAna jatuM rahe, khalAsa thaI jAya. kAraNa ke zaMkA eTale ApaghAta ! jene zaMkA karavI hoya te kare. praznakartA : vaijJAniko zaMkA vagara mAnI letAM nathI. e loko zaMkA kare che eTale kaMI zodhakhoLa kare che. dAdAzrI : e zaMkA nathI. e utkaMThA che, jANavAnI. emane zaMkA hoya nahIM. praznakartA : tame mANasa upara zaMkA karavAnuM nA kaho cho ? dAdAzrI : mANasa zuM, koI paNa jagyAe zaMkA nA karAya. A pustakamAM ya zaMkA nA karAya. zaMkA eTale ApaghAta ! dAdAzrI : nizcayamAM to saMzaya AkhA jagatane hoya ja. e to kAyadesara hoya. kRSNa bhagavAne vyavahAramAM saMzayAtmA vinazyati' lakheluM che. je mANasane jyAM ne tyAM zaMkA paDe, bairImAM zaMkA paDe, bApamAM zaMkA paDe, mAmAM zaMkA Ave, bhAImAM zaMkA Ave, e mANasa marelo ja che ne ! badhAmAM zaMkA Ave, e mANasa jIve ja zI rIte ? AkhuM jagata AtmAnA saMzayamAM che ja jANe che, ene kazuM maravAnuM nathI. paNa je vyavahAramAM saMzayavALo che te marI jAya, e marelo ja che. e mANasane koI para

Page #57
AptavANI-9 praznakartA : to pachI dareka pustakamAM lakheluM badhuM mAnI levAya ? dAdAzrI : mAnI levAnuM nahIM. zaMkA eka miniTa ja rAkhI ane pharI javAnuM. enAthI AgaLa gayA to zaMkA evaDuM moTuM 'poIjhana' che ke eka miniTathI vadhAre levAmAM Ave to ApaghAta thAya. praznakartA : paNa khoTuM ja lakhyuM hoya to zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : khoTuM hotuM ja nathI. paNa je zaMkA Ave che, te eka miniTa zaMkA karI ane pachI zaMkA baMdha karI devAnI. bhakto mATe to.... praznakartA atyAre hindustAnamAM badhA ja dharmAtmAo, dharmaguruo kahe che ke "huM ja bhagavAna svarUpa chuM.' te mAnI levAnuM ? zaMkA nahIM karavAnI ? dAdAzrI : hA, badhA lakhe temAM zuM ? ApaNane zaMkA rAkhavAnI jarUra nathI. ApaNane samajaNa na paDI jAya ke khoTuM che A. zaMkA rAkhavAnI kyAM vAta che ? zaMkA vastu judI che. zaMkA tame je kahevA mAgo cho te zaMkAnI jarUra ja nathI. 'ame bhagavAna chIe', emAM to zaMkAnI jarUra ja nathI. atyAre e bhagavAna thaI, ane pachI 'e bhagavAna ne pote bhakta'nI peTha lokonuM gADuM cAlyA karatuM hoya. emAM zaMkA paDI javAno saMbhava thAya. kAraNa ke emAM karArabhaMga thAya agara to kaMIka navI jAtanuM dekhAya tyAre zaMkA paDavAno saMbhava thAya. bAkI, Ama zaMkA paDavAnuM koI kAraNa ja nathI ne ! 64 AptavANI-9 UMcuM che. mATe tame tyAM jAva." e saMpUrNa kahe to ja tyAM bese, nahIM to. A loko UbhAM rahe bicArAM ! ene zaMkA paDyA kare ke "A haze ke te haze ? e haze ke te haze ?" praznakartA : to pachI tyAM athaDAI nA paDe ? koI paNa tapAsanuM mULa to zaMkA hoya che ne ?! dAdAzrI : tapAsa karIe, ne vicArIne khasI javAnuM ApaNe ! tapAsavuM, vicAravAnuM ne khasI javAnuM. zaMkAne vacce lAvavAnuM kaMI kAraNa nathI. zaMkA to kyAre paDe ? ke benuM 'egrImenTa' thayeluM hoya tyAra pachI vacce kaMIka bhAMjagaDa thAya tyAre zaMkA utpanna thAya. zaMkA ema ne ema to hoya ja nahIM. eTale zaMkA kyAM hoya ? ke benuM kaMI anusaMdhAna hoya, e bemAM potAnA 'DIsAIDeDa' pramANe kaMI emAM jo AghuMpAchuM thAya tyAre zaMkA paDe ke A zuM che te ! te ya miniTathI vadhAre zaMkA rakhAya nahIM. pachI to eNe nakkI karI nAkhavuM joIe ke mAruM 'vyavasthita' AvuM che. paNa zaMkA to karAya ja nahIM pachI. zaMkA eTale ApaghAta ! rAkhavI, vahematI davA ! praznakartA : mANasane manamAM vahema Ave che, e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : kyAMthI Ave ? koI jagyAethI 'ekasporTa thayelI hovI joIe ne ? to ja ApaNe tyAM "ImporTa thAya ne ! eka mANase dahADe kaMI bhUtanI vAta sAMbhaLI hoya ke phalANA bhAIne tyAM bhUta vaLagyuM che. bAIsAheba gayA hoya piyara, te bhAI ekalA rUmamAM sUI gayA. sUI gayA pachI rasoDAmAM uMdare kaMI pyAlo khakhaDAvyo haze ! rAte bAra vAge pyAlo khakhaDyo ane pelA bhAIe avAja sAMbhaLyo ane dahADe pelI bhUtanI vAta sAMbhaLelI, te 'eviDansa' bhego thayo, eTale manamAM thaI gayuM ke "kaMIka che, AvaDo moTo pyAlo koNe pADyo ?" eTale jyAM sudhI Ano phoDa paDe nahIM, tyAM sudhI Amano vahema jAya nahIM. A je jJAna lAdhyuM che, te AnA virodhI bIjuM jJAna praznakartA : dareka bhagavAnanA bhakto to ema ja kahe ke amArA bhagavAna saMpUrNa bhagavAna che. dAdAzrI : evuM ja kahevuM joIe. evuM nA kahe to huM emane kahuM chuM ja ke, "bhAI, tamAre saMpUrNa mAnajo. ahIMnA karatAM e UMcuM che.' tyAre e kahe, "ahIMnA barobara che ?" meM kahyuM, 'ahIMnA karatAM UMcuM che e." eka saMtanuM ya meM emanA bhaktone kaheluM ke, "bhaI, ahIMnA karatAM tyAM

Page #58
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 65 lAdhe nahIM, tyAM sudhI A bhAI AvA ne AvA rahe. tyAra horuM pAMca vAge koI 'phrenDa' Ave ke, "caMdubhAI UTho." tyAre 'caMdubhAIne hiMmata AvI jAya. zuM kaheze ? ke huM to Aje gabharAI gayo hato.' pelo 'phrenDa kaheze ke, "mahIM juo to kharA, zuM che ?" pachI jue tyAre khabara paDe ke A to uMdaraDAe pADyuM, A Dabbo pADI nAkhyo, A pyAlo pADI nAkhyo, A pADI nAkhyuM. eTale vahema peThelo, te nIkaLI jAya. eTale A to samajaNa pherane laIne UMgha nathI AvatI ne ! pyAlo uMdaraDAe khakhaDAvyo ane bhUtano vahema peTho, eTale e samajaNane laIne UMgha nathI AvatI ne ! paNa e vahema nIkaLI jAya, evI potAnI pAse davA hoya, to AkhI rAta UMgha Ave ne ? eTale mANasa sukhI thaI jAya. saheja samajaNamAM Avyo, te sukhI thaI jAya ! e to paramANuo pramANe ! eTale vahema Ave, te mahIM bharelo mAla che. vahemI je che ne, te strItva gaNAya che. kAraNa ke dareka manuSyamAM A traNa jAtanA paramANu hoya che. eka strInA paramANu hoya che, puruSanA paramANu hoya che ane napuMsakanA paramANu. A traNa jAtanA paramANuthI A zarIra baneluM che. temAMthI puruSanA paramANu vadhAre hovAthI puruSamAM janma thAya che. strInA paramANu vadhAre hoya to strI ane napuMsakanA paramANu vadhAre hoya to tevuM thAya che. A traNe ya prakAranA paramANu aMdara vadhatA-ochA che ja. eTale A vahema, saMdeha, zaMkA e badhuM strInA paramANuM che. ene ApaNe kahIe, 'ame puruSa chIe, tuM geTaAuTa !' amArAmAM evAM paramANu nA hoya, eTale amane koI jagyAe saMdeha nA paDe. "priyuDisa' pariName zaMkAmAM ! eTale mANase zaMkA to kyAreya paNa na karavI. AMkhe dIThuM hoya to ya zaMkA nA karavI. zaMkA jevuM ekeya bhUta nathI. zaMkA to karavI ja nahIM. mULathI, zaMkA utpanna thAya tyArathI ja kADhI nAkhavI ke 'dAdAe nA pADI che. koI kahe, 'meM jAte joyuM hoya to ? ke A mANasa kAle gajavAmAMthI rUpiyA laI gayo che, ne Aje pharI Avyo che." to ya enI para zaMkA nA karAya. enI para zaMkA karavA karatAM ApaNe ApaNI 'seIpha sAIDa karI levI. kAraNa ke ene 'prijaDisa' kahevAya che. Aje e Avo nA paNa hoya. kAraNa ke keTalAMka kAyamanA cora nathI hotA. keTalAMka saMjogavazAt cora hoya che, bahu ja aDacaNa paDI hoya to kADhI le, paNa pharI cha varSa sudhI nA dekhAya. gajavAmAM mUkI jAva to ya e nA aDe, evAM saMjogavazAt cora ! praznakartA ane ghaNAM rIDhA hoya, e corI karavAno dhaMdho ja laIne beThA hoya. dAdAzrI : e cora, e judI vastu che. evA cora hoya ne, tyAM to ApaNe koTa cheTo mUkI devo. chatAMya ene cora nA kahevo, kAraNa ke e to ApaNe kaMI ene moDhe ochA cora kahIe chIe ?! manamAM ja kahIe chIe ne ? moMDhe kahe to khabara paDI jAya ne ! manamAM kahIe tenuM jokhama ApaNuM, moMDhe kahIe tenuM jokhama ApaNuM nahIM. moMDhe kahIe to mAra khAya tenuM jokhama. ane peluM manamAM kahe e ApaNuM jokhama. eTale zuM karavuM joIe ApaNe ? praznakartA : manamAM ya nahIM rAkhavuM ne mAreya nahIM khAvo. dAdAzrI : hA, nahIM to moDhe kahI de te sAro, pelo be gALo bhAMDIne jato rahe. paNa A manamAM rahyuM, e jokhamadArI Ave. eTale uttama kayuM ? manamAM ye rAkhavuM nahIM, ne moDheya kahevuM nahIM, e uttama. manamAM rAkhavuM ane bhagavAne ' priyuDisa' kahyuM che. kAle karmano udaya hoya ne eNe lIdhuM, ane Aje karmano udaya nA paNa hoya, kAraNa ke, jagata jIva hai karmAdhInA !' eTale evuM bane ke nA bane ? praznakartA : bane. dAdAzrI : to ya paNa ApaNA loko zaMkA rAkhavAmAM bahu pAkA, nahIM ? ame to zaMkA rAkhIe ja nahIM, ane zaMkA pahelethI ja baMdha karI daIe, tALuM ja mArI dIdheluM ne ! zaMkA kADhI nAkhe e "jJAnI' kahevAya. e zaMkAnA bhUtathI to AkhuM jagata marI rahyuM che. kaheze, 'ahIMthI rahIne

Page #59
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 Ama gayo, A kAle peTho hato ne laI gayo hato, te ja have Ama gayo pAcho.' e mahIM zaMkA UbhI thaI. praznakartA: A mANasa Dakho kare che, evI enA upara zaMkA Ave to zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : Dakho koI karatuM ja nathI. evI zaMkA lAvanAra ja gunegAra. zaMkA lAvanArane jelamAM ghAlI devo joIe. bAkI evI zaMkA karanAro mAra khAya. zaMkA Ave eTale mAra khAya. pote ja mAra khAya. kudarata ja ene mAra Ape. bIjA koIne mAra Apavo nahIM paDe. zI rIte jagata ghaDIvAre ya jaMpIne rahI zake ?! keTalI jAtanAM bhUtAM, ne zaMkAo keTalI jAtanI ?! ne zaMkAmAM du:kha keTaluM paDatuM haze !! A jeTalA badhA tApa che ne, tApa, saMtApa, paritApa, uttApa, e badhA zaMkAthI UbhA thayA che. zaMkAnuM samAdhAna - ?' tamAre zaMkA koI dahADo kazI Ave nahIM ne ? praznakartA : e to Ave ja ne ! dAdAzrI : tamane zaMkA Ave to zuM karo ? praznakartA : cakAsaNI karIe. dAdAzrI : cakAsaNI karavAthI to vadhAre zaMkA pADe. have A je zaMkA che ne, A duniyAmAM koI cIja, jo kadI koI paNa rIte ArAdhavA jevI na hoya to zaMkA ! tamAma du:khonuM mULa kAraNa A zaMkA che. eTale amane koI kahe ne ke, 'zaMkA UbhI thaI che.' te ame to ene zikhavADatA ke "zaMkA jaDamULathI UkheDIne pheMkI do. zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM nathI. zaMkAthI mANasa khalAsa thaI jAya. koI paNa sthitimAM zaMkA nA rAkhavI. pachI je thavAnuM hoya te thAya.' zaMkA to nahIM ja rAkhavI. kAraNa ke zaMkA rAkhavAthI je sthiti banavAnI che te kaMI ghaTatuM nathI, vadhe che UlaTuM. zaMkA ne vahema ne evA tevA badhI jAtanA rogo UbhA thAya. zaMkAno roga, pAcho vahemano roga Ubho thAya. praznakartA : to pachI zaMkA mANasamAMthI kevI rIte nIkaLI zake ? dAdAzrI : nA nIkaLe koI dahADo ya, eTale zaMkA pesavA ja nA de to ja basa thayuM. praznakartA : paNa e je zaMkA pesI gaI hoya e zI rIte nIkaLe ? dAdAzrI : e to amArI pAse vidhi karAve eTale ene chUTI karI ApIe. paNa zaMkA mahIM utpanna nA thAya e mukhya vastu. praznakartA : paNa zaMkAnuM samAdhAna to joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, zaMkA jaze to dahADo vaLaze. evuM che ke, ahIM rAte tame sUI gayA hoya ene eka AvaDo nAno sApa gharamAM pesatAM dITho, pachI tamAre gharamAM sUvAnuM thAya to zuM thAya ? zaMkA rahyA kare ne ? e sApa nIkaLI gayo hoya paNa tame joyo nA hoya, to tamane zaMkA rahe ke nA rahe ? to pachIthI zI dazA thAya ? pachI UMgha kevI jabarajasta Ave ? praznakartA : UMgha UDI jAya ! dAdAzrI : have AmAM je jANatA nA hoya ne, tene UMgha Ave. ane jANanAra mANaso manamAM ema vicAra kare ke 'baLyuM, ApaNe joyuM. eTale have ApaNane UMgha nahIM Ave. paNa A lokone to sUI javA de bicArAMne !! je jANatA nA hoya te nAkhoraDAM bolAvA mAMDe. bAkI, pelo jANanAro hoya tene to UMgha zI rIte Ave ? kAraNa ke ene jJAna thayeluM che ke AvaDo sApa hato. to AnuM zuM thAya have ? eTale zAstro zuM kahe che ? ke sApa pesI gayAnuM jJAna tamane thayuM hatuM, e sApa nIkaLI gayAnuM jJAna thayuM hoya to ja tamAro chuTakAro che. pelo sApa nIkaLI jAya, paNa nIkaLI gayAnuM jJAna nA thayuM to tamArA manamAM zaMkA rahe ne UMgha nA Ave. AmathI Ama phare ne AmathI Ama phare ! ApaNe kahIe, kema pAsAM pheravo cho ? hA, eTale mahIM zaMkA rahyA

Page #60
AptavANI-9 69 kare ke "sApa Avaze ke zuM? Avaze ke zuM ?" e sApa Ave to zuM laI levAno hato ? gajavAmAMthI kaMI laI levAno hato ? praznakartA : gajavAmAMthI laIne e zuM kare ? dAdAzrI : tyAre zuM kare che ? praznakartA : DaMkha mAre. dAdAzrI : zA hAruM ? kAyadesara haze ke gerakAyadesara ? A duniyAmAM gerakAyadesara eka kSaNavAra koI cIja thatI ja nathI. je je thAya che e kAyadesara ja thAya che. mATe emAM bhUla khAtA nahIM. je thAya che e kAyadesara vagara thatuM ja nathI. mATe emAM zaMkA nA karazo. je thaI gayuM e kAyadesara ja hatuM. have tyAM ApaNuM jJAna zuM kahe che ? ke "sApa pesI gayo to mela ne chAla, 'vyavasthita che. sUI jAne, chAnomAno !" te ApaNuM jJAna to ene niHzaMka UMghADe ! - AvuM to ame ghaNI jagyAe sUI gayelA. kAraNa ke amAro dhaMdho badho jaMgalamAM ne, te ame AvuM ghaNI jagyAe sUI gayelA. e sApa A bAju sUI rahyo hoya, ApaNane ya dekhAya. pachI savAramAM UThIe tyAre ApaNe joIe ke pelo sApa haju ahIM sUI rahyo che. te e ya sUI rahyo hoya ne ApaNe ya sUI rahyA hoya. tyAre jaMgalamAM e bicAro kyAM jAya ? ene jyAM jagyA maLe tyAM ghara enuM. ene kaMI sAsarIye nahIM ne ! ApaNe to sAsarImAM ya be dahADA jaI AvIe !! tethI ame 'vyavasthita' kahyuM che ke, "ekajhekTanesa' che. emAM mInamekha pheraphAra nathI. pratyeka paryAyamAMthI pasAra ! A to badhI meM pRthakkaraNa karelI vastuo che. ne te A eka avatAranI nathI. eka avatAramAM to ATalAM badhAM pRthakkaraNa thAya ? eMsI varSamAM keTalAMka pRthakkaraNa thAya te ?! A to keTalAMya avatAranuM pRthakkaraNa che, te badhuM Aje hAjara thAya che. AptavANI-9 praznakartA : ATalAM badhAM avatAronuM pRthakkaraNa e atyAre bheguM thaI kevI rIte hAjara thAya ? dAdAzrI : AvaraNa tUTayuM eTale. mahIM jJAna to, che ja badhuM. AvaraNa tuTavuM joIe ne ? silakamAM jJAna to che ja, paNa AvaraNa tUTe eTale pragaTa thaI jAya ! badhAM ja phejhIjhanuM jJAna meM khoLI kADheluM. dareka 'phejhIjha'mAMthI huM pasAra thayelo chuM ane dareka 'phejha'no 'enDa" meM lAvI nAkhelo che. tyAra pachI "jJAna" thayeluM che A. caMdranAM keTalA 'phejha' ? AkhA paMdara 'phejha'. te paMdara 'phejha'mAM to AkhA jagatane anaMtakALathI ramADe che ! 'phejha' AkhA paMdara ane AkhA jagatane anaMtakALathI ramADa ramADa kare. eno e ja caMdramAM Aje trIja kahevAya che eTaluM ja che. jagatanAM loka trIja kahe che, paNa caMdramA teno te ja che. ane pAcho caMdramA zuM kaheze ? 'huM trIja chuM, huM trIja chuM. tyAre jagatanA loko bahAra nIkaLIne kaheze, "zuM bola bola kare che te ? kAle cotha nathI thavAnI ? gaI kAle bIja hatI. bola bola zuM kare che te ?" caMdramA teno te ja che. A bIja, trIja, cotha, pAMcama thayA ja karavAnI ! ane enI pare ya loka zaMkA kare. 'na hoya A trIja, A to bIja che kaheze. tyAre pelo kaheze, 'trIja che. AnI pare ya zaMkA kare che ke A bIja che ?" le !! zaMkAne kaMI khoLavA javAnuM che ? tethI to du:khI che badhAM, loko du:khI che. enuM kAraNa ja zaMkA che. naryuM duHkha, du:kha ne du:kha ja che. A vAta tethI huM samajavAnuM kahuM chuM ne, ke samajo, samajo, samajo ! badhAM "phejhIjha' samajavA jevA che. jagatanAM tamAma 'phejhIjha' mArI pAse AvelAM che. evuM eka 'phejha' bAkI nathI ke jemAMthI huM pasAra nA thayo houM ! dareka avatAranAM 'phejhIjha' mane khyAlamAM che ane dareka 'phejhanA anubhavavALI A vAta che. 'te' "seTala' kare, vyavahAra ! 'je vyavahAranI bahAra che, te 'seTala' karI Ape ! nahIM to tyAM

Page #61
71 AptavANI-9 sudhI vyavahAramAM 'seTala' thAya nahIM. je vyavahAramAM ja che, ene to vyavahAranuM bhAna ja nA hoya ne ! vyavahArano Agraha hoya, vyavahAramAM ja hoya. eTale vyavahAranI ene khabara ja nA hoya ne ! "jJAnI puruSa' vyavahAranI bahAra hoya. eTale emanI vANI ja evI nIkaLe ke badhuM ApaNane "ekajhekTa thaI jAya. zaMkA kADhaye jAya nahIM, 'jJAnI puruSa'nA kahevAthI zaMkA jatI rahe. bAkI, zaMkA kADhya nA jAya, UlaTI vadhe. zaMkA tukasAna ja karAve ! bahAra to bIjA loko UlaTAM kahe, jene pUchavA jAya tyAre kahe, 'bhAI, sAcI vAta hoya to ya zaMkA thAya ne ! zaMkA nA thAya to ApaNe mANasa zAnAM ? jAnavaramAM kaMI zaMkA thAya che ? ApaNe manuSya chIe eTale A choDIo upara zaMkA to thAya ja ne !' evuM zikhavADe. huM zaMkA zAthI uDADI dauM chuM? kAraNa ke zaMkA to kazI ya "helpa' karaze nahIM. eka tasuvAra, eka vALa jeTalI ya "helpa' karaze nahIM ne nukasAna pAra vagaranuM karaze. eTale huM zaMkA uDADI dauM chuM. zaMkA ja "helpa' karatI hoya to mArAthI evuM nA bolAya. dasa TakA ya zaMkA "helpa" karatI hoya ne navuM TakA nukasAna karatI hoya to ya mArAthI nA bolAya. A to eka vALa pUratI "helpa' nathI karatI ne nukasAna pAra vagaranuM ! zaMkA to TheTha maraNa karAve ! ane A zaMkA e ja vinAzanuM kAraNa che. zaMkAe ja mArI nAkhyA lokone, ane zaMkA paDI to zaMkAno "enDa' nA hoya. zaMkAno 'enDa' Ave nahIM, eTale mANasa khalAsa thaI jAya. banatAM sudhI strIo zaMkA AvI hoya to ya bhUlI jAya. paNa jo kadI yAda rahI gaI to zaMkA ja ene mArI nAkhe ne puruSo to zaMkA nA AvI hoya to ya UbhI kare. strI zaMkA rAkhe eTale pachI e DAkaNa kahevAya. eTale bhUta ne DAkaNa beu vaLagyuM. e pachI mArI ja nAkhe mANasane. huM to pUchI lauM ke konI konI para zaMkA thAya che ? gharamAM hau zaMkA thAya che badhe ? ADozI-pADozIo, bhAIo, baInA para, badhA para zaMkA thAya che ? to 72 AptavANI-9 kyAM thAya che ? tame mane kaho to huM tamane samuM karI ApuM. bAkI, A zaMkA e to cepI roga phelAyelo che. e zaMkA karanAra bahu duHkhI thAya ne ! muzkelI ne !! A to zaMkAzIla thayA eTale pachI badhAM upara zaMkA paDe. ane A duniyAmAM zaMkAzIla ane marelo, be sarakhAM ja che. je mANasane badhe zaMkA AvyA karatI hoya te zaMkAzIla. zaMkAzIla ne marelo, bemAM phera nathI. e mareluM jIvana jIve. suMdara saMcAlana tyAM zaMkA zI ? zaMkA koI vastu para nahIM rAkhavAnI. zaMkA e mahAduHkha che. enA jevuM koI du:kha ja nathI. A rAte tame hAMDavo khAdhelo ? ane te hAMDavo khaIne pachI saheja dUdha pIne sUI gayelA ke nahIM suI gayelA ? to pachI mahIM tapAsa karI nahIM ke mahIM pAcakarasa paDyA ke pitta paDyuM ke nA paDyuM. e badhuM ? 'bAIla' keTaluM paDyuM, keTalAM pAcakarasa paDyA, e badhI tapAsa karI nahIM ? praznakartA : e badhuM to thavAnuM ja ne ! e 'oTomeTikalI' thavAnuM ja che. e kaMI tapAsa karavAnI zI jarUra ! dAdAzrI : to A bahAra 'oTomeTika" nahIM thatuM hoya ? A aMdara to AvaDuM moTuM sarasa cAle che. bahAra to kazuM karavAnuM ja nathI. aMdara to lohI, yurina, saMDAsa badhuM juduM kare che, kevuM suMdara kare che ! pachI, baccAvALI mA hoya to dUdha e bAju mokale. keTalI taiyArI che badhI ! ne tame to nirAMte UMgho cho ghora ! ne mahIM to sarasa cAle che. koNa calAve che A ? aMdaranuM calAve che koNa ? ne enI para zaMkA nathI paDatI ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : to bahAranI ya zaMkA nA karAya. aMtaHkaraNamAM je thaI rahyuM che te ja bahAra thAya che, to zuM karavA hAya hAya karo cho ? vacce mahIM hAthe zuM karavAM ghAlo cho te ? A upAdhi zA sAru veTho cho te ?! vagara kAmanI upAdhi !!

Page #62
AptavANI-9 33 sarvakALe zaMkA jokhamI ja ! A choDIo bahAra jatI hoya, bhaNavA jatI hoya to ya Ama zaMkA. 'vAIpha' upare ya zaMkA. evo badho dago ! gharamAM ya dago ja che ne, atyAre ! A kaLiyugamAM potAnA gharamAM ja dago hoya. kaLiyuga eTale dagAno kALa. kapaTa ne dago, kapaTa ne dago, kapaTa ne dago ! emAM zuM sukhane mATe kare che ? te ya bhAna vagara bebhAnapaNe ! buddhizALI mANasane dago ne kapaTa nA hoya. nirmaLa buddhivALAne tyAM kapaTa ne dago nA hoya. A to 'phUliza' mANasane tyAM atyAre dago ne kapaTa hoya. kaLiyuga eTale 'phUliza' ja bhegAM thayAM che ne ! praznakartA : paNa A je dago ne kapaTa thAya, emAM paNa rAga ane dveSa kAma kare ne ? dAdAzrI : e rAga-dveSa hoya to ja A badhuM kAma thAya ne ! nahIM to rAga-dveSa nathI, tene to kazuM che ja nahIM ne ! rAga-dveSa nA hoya to je kare, e kapaTa kare to vAMdho nathI ne sAruM kare to ya vAMdho nathI. kAraNa ke e dhULamAM rame che kharo, paNa tela copaDeluM nathI ane pelo tela copaDIne dhULamAM rame che. praznakartA : paNa A dago ne kapaTa karavAmAM buddhino phALo kharo ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, sArI buddhi, e kapaTa ne dago kADhI nAkhe. buddhi 'sephasAIDa' rAkhe. eka to zaMkA mArI nAkhe, pachI A kapaTa ne dago to hoya ja, ane pAchAM potAnA sukhamAM ja dareka rAcatA hoya. praznakartA : paNa potAnA sukhamAM rahevA mATe buddhinA upayogathI dago ne kapaTa ramI zake ne ? dAdAzrI : jyAM potAnI jAtanuM sukha khoLavuM tyAM sArI buddhi hoya ja nahIM ne ! sArI buddhi to sAmudAyika sukha khoLe ke AkhuM mAruM ghara sukhI thAya. paNa A to chokaro potAnuM sukha khoLato hoya, bairI potAnuM 74 AptavANI-9 sukha khoLatI hoya, choDI potAnuM sukha khoLatI hoya, bApa potAnuM sukha khoLato hoya, dareka potapotAnAM sukha khoLe che. A to UghADuM kare ne, to gharanAM mANaso bhegAM rahe nahIM. paNa A to badhAya bhegAM rahe che ne khAya che ne pIve che ! DhAMkeluM te ja sAruM. bAkI zaMkA rAkhavA jevI cIja ja nathI, koI prakAre. e zaMkA ja mANasane mArI nAkhe. A badhAM zaMkAne laIne marI ja rahyAM che ne ! eTale A duniyAmAM moTAmAM moTuM bhUta hoya to zaMkAnuM bhUta che. moTAmAM moTuM bhUta ! jagatamAM kaMIka lokone khaI gayelI, bharakhI gayelI ! mATe zaMkA UbhI ja nA thavA devI. zaMkA janmatAM ja mAravI. game tevI zaMkA UbhI thAya to janmatAM ja ene mAravI, eno velo vadhavA nA devo. nahIM to jaMpIne nahIM besavA de zaMkA, e koIne jaMpIne nA besavA de. zaMkAe to lokone mArI nAkhelA. moTA moTA rAjAone, cakravartIone paNa zaMkAe mArI nAkhelA. etAM jokhama to bhAre ! lokoe kahyuM hoya 'A nAlAyaka mANasa che' to ya ApaNe ene lAyaka kahevo. kAraNa ke vakhate nAlAyaka nA paNa hoya. ne ene nAlAyaka kahezo to bahu doSa besaze. satI hoya ne jo vezyA kahevAI gaI to bhayaMkara guno, tenuM keTalAMya avatAra sudhI bhogavyA karavuM paDaze. mATe koInAye cAritra-saMbaMdhamAM bolazo nahIM. kAraNa ke e khoTuM nIkaLe to ? lokonA kahevAthI ApaNe ya kahevA lAgIe to emAM ApaNI zI kiMmata rahI ? ame to evuM koI dahADo ye koInuM ye bolIe nahIM, ne koIne ya bolyo nathI. huM to hAtha ja nA ghAluM ne ! e javAbadArI koNa le ? koInAM cAritrya-saMbaMdhI zaMkA nA karAya. bahu moTuM jokhama che. zaMkA to ame kyAre ya lAvIe nahIM. jokhama ApaNe zuM karavA laIe ? aMdhArAmAM, keTalIka AMkho tANavI ?! praznakartA : paNa zaMkAthI jovAnI mananI graMthi paDI gaI hoya to tyAM kyuM 'eDajasTamenTa' levuM ? dAdAzrI : A tamane dekhAya che ke AnuM cAritra kharAba che. te zuM

Page #63
35 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 tevuM pUrve nahotuM ? A to ociMtuM kaMI utpanna thaI gayeluM che ? eTale samajI levA jevuM che A jagata, ke A to Ama ja hoya. A kALamAM cAritrya-saMbaMdhI koInuM jovuM ja nahIM. A kALamAM to badhe evuM ja hoya. ughADuM nA hoya, paNa mana to bagaDe ja. emAM strI cAritrya to navuM kapaTa ane mohanuM ja saMgrahasthAna, tethI to strIno avatAra Ave. AmAM sahuthI sArAmAM sAruM e ke je viSayathI chUTyA hoya. praznakartA : A cAritramAM to Ama ja hoya e jANIe. chatAM ya mana zaMkA dekhADe tyAre tanmayAkAra thaI javAya. tyAM kayuM 'eDajasTamenTa' levuM ? dAdAzrI : AtmA thayA pachI bIjAmAM paDavuM ja nahIM. A badhuM 'phorena DIpArTamenTa'nuM che. ApaNe 'homa'mAM rahevuM. AtmAmAM raho ne ! AvuM 'jJAna' pharI pharI maLe evuM nathI, mATe kAma kADhI lo. eka jaNane enI 'vAIpha' para zaMkA AvyA kare. tene meM kahyuM ke zaMkA zene lIdhe thAya che ? meM joyuM tene lIdhe zaMkA thAya che ? zuM nahotuM joyuM tyAre nahotuM banatuM AvuM ? ApaNo loka to pakaDAya, tene cora kahe. paNa pakaDAyo nathI, te badhA mahIMthI cora ja che. paNa A to pakaDAyo, tene cora kahe che. alyA, ene zuM karavA cora kahe che ? e to suMvALo hato. ochI corI karI che tethI pakaDAyo. vadhAre corI karanArAM pakaDAtAM haze ? praznakartA : paNa pakaDAya tyAre cora kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, ochI corIo kare te pakaDAya. ane pakaDAya eTale loka ene cora kahe. alyA, cora to A nathI pakaDAtA te che. paNa jagata to AvuM ja che. eTale e bhAI mAruM vijJAna AkhuM samajI gayo. pachI e mane kahe che ke, "mArI vAIpha upara have bIjA koIno hAtha phare to ya huM bhaDakuM nahIM.' hA, AvuM joIe. mokSe javuM hoya to Ama che. nahIM to laDhavADa karyA karo tamArI meLe. tamArI 'vAIpha' ke tamArI strI A duSamakALamAM tamArI thAya nahIM. ane evI khoTI AzA rAkhavI ya phogaTa che. A duSamakALa che, eTale A duSamakALamAM to jeTalAM dahADA ApaNane roTalA khavaDAve che eTalAM dahADA ApaNI ane nahIM to bIjAne khavaDAve to enI. eTale badhA 'mahAtmA'one kahI dIdheluM ke zaMkA nA rAkhazo. nahIM to ya mAruM kahevAnuM, ke joyuM nA hoya tyAM sudhI tene satya mAno cho ja zA mATe, A kaLiyugamAM ? A che ja polampola che, je meM joyuM che tenuM tamane varNana karuM to badhAM mANasa jIvatAM ja nA rahe. to have evAM kALamAM ekalA paDI rahevuM mastImAM ane AvuM 'jJAna' joDe hoya, enA jevuM to ekuMya nahIM. mATe kAma kADhI levA jevuM che atyAre. tethI ame kahIe chIe ne, ke kAma kADhI lo, kAma kADhI lo, kAma kADhI lo ! e kahevAno bhAvArtha eTalo ja che ke AvuM koI kALe AvatuM nathI ane AvyuM che to mAthuM melIne kAma kADhI lo ! eTale tamane samajAyuM ne ? ke nA joyuM to kazuM thAta nahIM. A to dekhyAnuM jhera che ! praznakartA: hA, dekhAyuM eTale ja evuM thAya che. dAdAzrI : A badhuM jagata aMdhArAmAM pola ja cAlI rahyuM che. amane A badhuM 'jJAna'mAM dekhAyuM. ane tamane jovAmAM nA AvyuM eTale tame juo ane bhaDako ! alyA, bhaDako cho zuM ? badhuM AmAM, A to Ama ja cAlI rahyuM che, paNa tamane dekhAtuM nathI. AmAM bhaDakavA jevuM che ja zuM ? tame AtmA cho, to bhaDakavA jevuM kyAM rahyuM ? A to badhuM je 'cArja) thaI gayeluM, tenuM ja 'DiscArja che ! jagata cokhkhuM 'DiscArjamaya che. 'DiscArjanI bahAra A jagata nathI. eTale ame kahIe chIene, 'DiscArja'maya che eTale koI gunegAra nathI. praznakartA : eTale emAM ya karmano siddhAMta kAma kare ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, karmano siddhAMta ja kAma karI rahyo che. bIjuM kazuM nahIM. mANasano doSa nathI, A karma ja bhamAve che bicArAMne, paNa emAM zaMkA rAkhe ne, to pelo marI jAya vagara kAmano.

Page #64
AptavANI-9 37 mokSe janArAone ! dehAdhyAsa chUTe to jANavuM ke mokSe javAnI taiyArI thaI. dehAdhyAsa eTale dehamAM Atmabuddhi ! e badhuM dehAdhyAsa kahevAya. koI gALa bhAMDe, mAre, ApaNI 'vAIpha'ne ApaNI rUbarU uThAvI jAya to ya mahIM rAgadveSa nA thAya to jANavuM ke vItarAgano mArga pakaDayo che ! loka to pachI potAnI nabaLAIne laIne uThAvI javA de che ne ! pelo jabaro hoya to 'vAIpha'ne uThAvI javA de che ne ! eTale A kazuM potAnuM che ja nahIM. A badhuM ja pArakuM che. mATe vyavahAramAM rahevuM hoya to vyavahAramAM majabUta thA ne mokSe javuM hoya to mokSane lAyaka thA ! jyAM A deha paNa potAno nathI tyAM strI potAnI zI rIte thAya ? choDI potAnI zI rIte thAya ? eTale tamAre to badhI jAtanuM vicArI nAkhavuM joIe, ke strI uThAvI jAya to zuM karavuM ?! je banavAnuM che temAM pheraphAra thAya evuM nathI, evuM 'vyavasthita' che. mATe bhaDakazo nahIM. eTale ema kahyuM che ke 'vyavasthita' che ! nA jovAmAM Ave tyAre kaheze, mArI vahu. ane joyuM eTale phaphaDATa ! alyA, pahelethI hatuM ja AvuM. AmAM navuM khoLazo ja nahIM. praznakartA : paNa 'dAdA'e bahu DhIluM mUkI dIdhuM. dAdAzrI : mAruM kahevAnuM ke duSamakALamAM ApaNe khoTI AzA rAkhIe eno artha ja nathI ne ! ane A sarakAre paNa 'DAyavorsa'no kAyado kADhI Apyo. sarakAra pahelethI jANe ke AvuM thavAnuM che. mATe kAyado pahelo nIkaLe. eTale haMmezAM davAno choDavo pahelo pAke, tyAra pachI roga utpanna thAya. evI rIte A kAyado pahelo nIkaLe, tyAra pachI ahIM lokonA evAM banAva bane ! cAritra saMbaMdhI 'seIpha sAIDa' ! mATe jene bairInA cAritra saMbaMdhI zAMti joItI hoya to teNe raMge ekadama kALI chUMdaNAvALI bairI lAvavI ke jethI jenuM koI gharAka ja nA AptavANI-9 thAya, koI ene saMghare ja nahIM. ane e ja ema kahe ke, "mane koI saMgharanArA nathI. A eka dhaNI maLyA e ja saMghare che.' eTale e tamane 'sinsIyara' rahe, bahu 'sinsIyara' rahe. bAkI, rUpALI hoya tene to loka bhogave ja. rUpALI hoya eTale lokonI draSTi bagaDavAnI ja ! koI rUpALI vahu lAve to amane e ja vicAra Ave ke AnI zI dazA thaze ! kALI chUMdaNAvALI hoya to ja 'seIphasAIDa' rahe. 78 vahu bahu rUpALI hoya tyAre pelo bhagavAna bhUle ne ?! ane dhaNI bahu rUpALo hoya to e baI ya bhagavAna bhUle ! mATe rItasara badhuM sAruM. ApaNA vaiDiyA to evuM kahetA ke khetara rAkhavuM copATa, ane bairuM rAkhavuM kobADa' AvuM zAnA mATe kahetA ? ke jo vahu bahu rUpALI haze to ko'ka najara bagADaze. enAM karatAM A vahu jarA kadarUpI sArI, jethI koI naja2 bagADe nahIM ne ! A vaiDiyAo bIjI rIte kahetA hatA, e dharmanI rIte nahotA kahetA. huM dharmanI rIte kahevA mAguM chuM. vahu kadarUpI hoya to ApaNane koI bho ja nahIM ne ! gherathI bahAra nIkaLyA to ya koI najara bagADe ja nahIM ne ! ApaNA thaiDiyA to bahu pAkA hatAM. paNa huM je kahevA mAguM chuM te evuM nathI, e juduM che. e kadarUpI hoya ne, te ApaNA manane bahu herAna nA kare, bhUta thaIne vaLage nahIM. kevI dagAkhorI A !! A loka to kevAM che ? ke jyAM 'hoTala' dekhe tyAM 'jame.' mATe zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM jagata nathI. zaMkA ja duHkhadAyI che. have jyAM hoTala dekhe tyAM jame, emAM puruSe ya evuM kare che ne strI paNa evuM kare che. pAchuM sAmA puruSane evuM nathI ke mArI strI zuM karatI haze ? e to ema ja jANe ke mArI strI to sArI che. paNa enI strI to ene pATho bhaNAvatI hoya ! puruSo paNa strIne pATha bhaNAve ane strIo paNa puruSone pATho bhaNAve !! to paNa strIo jIte che. kema ke A puruSone kapaTa nahIMne ! tethI puruSo strIothI chetarAI jAya !! eTale jyAM sudhI 'sinsIyAriTI-morAliTI' che, tyAM sudhI saMsAra bhogavavA jevo hato. atyAre to bhayaMkara dagAkhorI che. A darekane enI

Page #65
AptavANI-9 'vAIpha'nI vAta kahI dauM to koI potAnI 'vAIpha' pAse jAya nahIM. huM badhAnuM jANuM, paNa kazuM ya kahuM karuM nahIM. jo ke puruSe ya dagAkhorImAM kaMI ocho nathI. paNa strI to naryuM kapaTanuM ja kArakhAnuM ! kapaTanuM saMgrahasthAna bIje kyAMya nA hoya, eka strImAM ja hoya. AvA dagAmAM moha zA ? 39 A saMDAsa hoya che, temAM sahu koI loko jAya ne ? ke eka ja mANasa jAya ? praznakartA : badhAM ja jAya. dAdAzrI : to badhAM jemAM jAya e saMDAsa kahevAya che. eTale jyAM AgaLa bahu loka jAya ne, enuM nAma saMDAsa ! jyAM sudhI ekapatnIvrata ane eka pativrata hoya tyAM sudhI e UMcAmAM UMcI vastu kahevAya. tyAM sudhI cAritra kahevAya, nahIM to pachI saMDAsa kahevAya. tamAre tyAM saMDAsamAM keTalAM mANasa jatAM haze ? praznakartA : gharanAM badhAM ja jAya. dAdAzrI : eka ja jaNa nA jAya ne ? eTale pachI be jAya ke badhAM ja jAya, paNa e saMDAsa kahevAya. A to hoTala AvI tyAM jame. are, khAya-pIve hauM ! mATe zaMkA kADhI nAkhajo. zaMkAthI to hAthamAM Avelo mokSa paNa jato rahe. eTale ApaNe ema ja samajI levAnuM ke ene huM paiNelo chuM ane e mArI bhADUtI che ! basa, ATaluM manamAM samajI rAkhavAnuM. pachI te bIjAM game tenI joDe pharatI hoya to ya ApaNe zaMkA nA karavI. ApaNe kAma sAthe kAma che ne ? ApaNane saMDAsanI jarUra hoya to saMDAsa jaI AvavuM ! gayA vagara cAle nahIM, enuM nAma saMDAsa. tethI to jJAnIo cokhkhuM kahe che ne, ke saMsAra e dago che. praznakartA : dago nathI lAgato e zA kAraNe ? dAdAzrI : mohane laIne ! ane koI kahenAra paNa maLyo nathI ne ! AptavANI-9 paNa lAla vAvaTo dhare to gADI UbhI rahe, nahIM to gADI jaIne nIce paDe. zaMkAtI parAkASThAe samAdhAta ! 80 eTale zaMkAthI ja jagata UbhuM rahyuM che. je jhADane sUkavavAnuM che, tene ja zaMkA karIne pANI chAMTe che ne tenAthI vadhAre UbhuM thAya che. eTale koI jAtanI zaMkA karavA jevuM A jagata nathI. have tamane bIjI koI saMsAranI zaMkA paDe che ? tamArI 'vAIpha' bIjA koInI joDe bAMkaDe beThI hoya ane te cheTethI tamane jovAmAM Ave, to tamane zuM thAya ? praznakartA : have kazuM nA thAya. thoDI Ama 'iphekTa' thAya, pachI kazuM nA thAya. pachI to 'vyavasthita' che ane e RNAnubaMdha che, ema khyAla AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : kevA pAkAM che ! guNAkAra keTalo badho che ! ane zaMkA to nA thAya ne ? praznakartA : nA thAya, dAdA. dAdAzrI : ane A loka to 'vAIpha' saheja moDI Ave to ya zaMkA karyA kare. zaMkA karavA jevI nathI. RNAnubaMdhanI bahAra kazuM ja thavAnuM nathI. e ghera Ave eTale ene samaja pADavI, paNa zaMkA karavI nahIM. zaMkA to UlaTuM pANI vadhAre chAMTe. hA, cetavavuM kharuM. paNa zaMkA kazI rAkhavI nahIM. zaMkA rAkhanAra mokSa khoI bese che. eTale ApaNe jo chUTavuM hoya, mokSe javuM hoya to ApaNe zaMkA karavI nahIM. koI bIjo mANasa tamArI 'vAIpha'nA gaLe hAtha nAkhIne pharato hoya ne e tamArA jovAmAM AvyuM, to zuM ApaNe jhera khAvuM ! praznakartA : nA, evuM zuM karavA karuM ! dAdAzrI : to pachI zuM karavuM ? praznakartA : thoDuM nATaka karavuM paDe, pachI samajAvavuM. pachI to je kare

Page #66
82. AptavANI-9 te 'vyavasthita'. dAdAzrI : hA, barobara che. tamArI 'vAIpha' upara ne gharamAM koInI upare ya tamane zaMkA have bilakula thAya nahIM ne ?! kAraNa ke A badhI 'phAIlo che. emAM zaMkA karavA jevuM zuM che ? je hisAba haze, je RNAnubaMdha haze, e pramANe phAIlo bhaTakaze ane ApaNe to mokSe javuM che !! e to bhayaMkara roga ! nahIM to have tyAM AgaLa e vahema pesI gayo, to e vahema bahu sukha(!) Ape(!), nahIM ? praznakartA H aMdara kIDA jevuM kAma kare, kotaryA kare. dAdAzrI : hA, jAgratakALa badho ya ene karaDI khAya. TI.bI.no roga ! TI.bI. to sAro ke amuka kALa sudhI ja asara kare, pachI nA kare. eTale A zaMkA e to TI.bI.no roga che. e zaMkA jene utpanna thaI gaI ene TI.bI.nI zarUAta thaI gaI. eTale zaMkA koI rIte "helpa' kare nahIM. zaMkA nukasAna ja kare. eTale zaMkA to mULamAMthI, e Uge tyArathI ja baMdha karI devI, bArI pADI devI. nahIM to to jhADa rUpe thAya e to ! zaMkAtI asaro ! zaMkAno artha zo ? lokone dUdhapAka jamADavo che e dUdhapAkamAM eka zera mIThuM nAkhI devuM, enuM nAma zaMkA. pachI zuM thAya ? dUdhapAka phATI jAya. eTalI javAbadArIno to lokone khyAla nathI. ame zaMkAthI to bahu cheTA rahIe. vicAra Ave amane badhI jAtanA. mana che te vicAra to Ave, paNa zaMkA nA paDe. huM zaMkAnI draSTithI koIne jouM to bIje dahADe enuM mane ja juduM paDI jAya mArAthI ! eTale koI paNa vastumAM zaMkA paDe, te zaMkAo nahIM rAkhavI. ApaNe jAgrata rahevuM, paNa sAmA upara zaMkAo nahIM rAkhavI. zaMkA ApaNane mArI nAkhe. sAmAne je thavAnuM hoya te thAya, paNa ApaNane to e zaMkA mArI ja nAkhe. kAraNa ke e zaMkA to mANasa marI jAya tyAM AptavANI-9 sudhI ene choDe nahIM. zaMkA paDe eTale mANasanuM vajana vadhe ke ? mANasa maDadAMnI jema jIvatA hoya tenA jevuM thAya. eTale koI paNa vAtamAM zaMkA nA kare to uttama che. zaMkA to jaDamULathI kADhI nAkhavAnI. vyavahAramAM ya zaMkA kADhI nAkhavAnI che. zaMkA "helpa' nathI karatI, nukasAna ja kare che. ane A risAvuM e ya phAyado nathI karatuM, nukasAna ja kare che. keTalAka zabdo ekAMte nukasAna kare che. ekAMte eTale zuM ? lAbhAlAbha hoya to to ThIka che vAta paNa A to ekAMte alAbha ja badho. evAM guNo (!) kADhI nAkhe to sAruM. buddhi bagADe saMsAra ! praznakartA : paNa bahu buddhizALI mANasone kema vadhAre zaMkA hoya ? dAdAzrI : ene buddhithI badhA paryAya dekhAya. evuM dekhAya ke AvuM haze, Ama hAtha mUkI gayo haze. koIka mANasa potAnI 'vAIpha' upara hAtha mUkI gayo, eTale pachI badhA paryAya UbhA thaI jAya, ke zuM haze ?! te badhuM AkhuM keTaluM laMgara cAle ! ane pelA abudhane kazI bhAMjagaDa nahIM. ane e ya kharekhara abudha nathI hotA, potAno saMsAra cAle eTalI buddhi hoya. ene bIjI kazI bhAMjagaDa nahIM. thoDuMka thaIne pachI baMdha thaI jAya. praznakartA : eTale Apa evuM kahevA mAgo cho ke je sAMsArika abudha che, je haju buddhimAM Devalapa nathI thayAM ? dAdAzrI : nA, evAM to mANaso bahu ochAM hoya, majUro ne e badhA ! praznakartA : paNa e loko buddhizALI thaIne pachI abudha dazAne prApta thaze ne ? dAdAzrI : e to vAta ja judIne ! e to paramAtmapada kahevAya. buddhizALI thayA pachI abdha thAya ne, e to paramAtmapada che ! paNa e buddhizALI lokone A saMsAra bahu herAna kare. are, pAMca choDIo hoya ane e buddhizALI mANasa hoya to, A choDIo moTI

Page #67
AptavANI-9 rAta-dahADo ! te tyAM AgaLa "koleja'mAM jAya to joDe ne joDe jA, ne basa tyAM AgaLa. pelA sAheba pUche ke, "kema joDe Avo cho ?" tyAre kaheje, "bhaI, ATalA sAruM ke mane zaMkA rahyA kare che ne, te joDe rahuM to zaMkA nA rahe ne ? tyAre loka ene cakrama kahe. are, enI choDIo ja kahe ne, ke gAMDA che jarA. AptavANI-9 uMmaranI thaI, have e badhI bahAra jAya, te badhA paryAya ene yAda Ave. buddhithI badhuM ja samajaNa paDe. eTale badhuM ene dekhAya ane pachI te gUMcAyA kare. ane pAchuM chokarIone "koleja' to mokalavI ja paDe ane Ama thAya te ya jovuM paDe. ane kharekhara kazuM banyuM ke nA banyuM e vAta bhagavAna jANe paNa pelo to zaMkAthI mAryo jAya ! ane bane che tyAM ene khabara ja nathI, eTale tyAM zaMkA nathI ene. ane nathI banatuM tyAM zaMkA pAra vagaranI che. eTale naryuM zaMkAmAM ja baphAyA kare che pachI, ane ene bhaya ja lAge. eTale zaMkA UbhI thaI ke mANasa mAryo jAya. zaMkA, kuzaMkA, AzaMkA ? praznakartA : zaMkA, kuzaMkA, AzaMkA samajAvo. dAdAzrI : uMmaralAyaka thayelI choDI hoya, eTale jo buddhizALI bApa hoya ne ane ocho mohI hoya ne, to ene samajAI jAya ke AnA joDe zaMkA rAkhavI ja paDaze, have zaMkAnI najare jovuM paDaze. kharo jAgrata mANasa to jAgrata ja hoya ne ! have zaMkAnI najare jue to eka dahADo zaMkAnI najare jovAnuM paNa kaMI roja jovAnuM ? ne bIje dahADe zaMkAnI najare joIe, e badhI AzaMkA kahevAya. koI 'enDa' hoya ke nA hoya ? te je draSTithI joyuM. teno "enDa' to hovo joIe ne ? te pachI AzaMkA kahevAya. have kuzaMkA kyAre ? koI chokarA joDe pharatI hoya tyAre manamAM jAtajAtanI kuzaMkAo kare. have evuM hoya kharuM ne evuM nA ya paNa hoya. AvI badhI zaMkAo mANasa karyA kare che ane duHkhI thAya che. zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM jagata ja nathI, jAgRti rAkhavA jevuM jagata che. zaMkA e to pote duHkha vahorI lAvyo. e to kIDo khAyA ja kare ene, rAta-dahADo khAyA ja kare. jAgRti rAkhavAnI jarUra. A to ApaNA hAthamAM nahIM ne hAya hAya karIe, eno artha zo ? kAM to tane samajaNa paDatI hoya to choDIonuM bhaNavAnuM baMdha karAya. tyAre e kahe, "nAbhaNAvuM to koNa le ene ?" tyAre alyA, Ame ya nathI TaLato ne Ama ya nathI TaLato, eka bAju TaLane ! nahIM to e choDInI joDe pharyA kara eTale choDI para zaMkA karavAnuM nA kahuM chuM ane loko choDI para zaMkAvALA che ke nahIM. emane AvI zaMkA nathI hotI. ene to sAta choDIo hoya to ya kazuM nahIM. rAma tArI mAyA ! emane zaMkA to bIjI hoya che ke amArA bhAgIdAra roja kaMIka pAMca-dasa rUpiyA ghera laI jAya che kharA." evI zaMkA ene rahe. paisAnI ene priyatA che ne ! eTale paisA amArA bhAgIdAra laI jAya che, e ene zaMkA Ave. te eka ja dahADo zaMkA karI, enuM nAma zaMkA ane vAreghaDIe zaMkA karIe, enuM nAma AzaMkA. mohathI mUrjita dazA ! pelI choDIonI bAbatamAM zaMkA nA Ave. kAraNa ke choDIono moha kharo ne ! jyAM moha hoya tyAM enI bhUla nA samajaNa paDe. mohathI mAra khoyane, jagata. badhA ya mA-bApa ema kahe ke 'amArI dIkarIo sarasa che.' to to satyuga ja cAle che ema kahevAya ne ? badhAM mA-bApa evuM ja kahe ne ? jene pUchIe te badhA evuM kahe to pachI satyuga ja cAle che ne bahAra ?! tyAre pAcho e kahe, "nA, lokonI choDIo bagaDI gaI che.' evuM hau kahe. praznakartA : atyAre to enI choDInuM kahevA jaIe to ApaNane vaLagI paDe. dAdAzrI : e to kahevAya ja nahIM. coMTI paDe ne gALo hau bhAMDe. koIne kazuM kahevAya ja nahIM. eTaluM sAruM che ke dareka mA-bApane potAnI choDIo-chokarAo para rAga hoya che. eTale rAgane laIne emanA doSa dekhAtA nathI ane bIjAnI choDIonA doSa badhA ya joI Ape. potAnI choDInA doSa nathI dekhAtA eTaluM sAruM che ne, e to zAMtimAM rAkhe ane

Page #68
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 pachI AgaLanI vAta dekha leMge. evI TIkA karavA jevI nathI eka bhAI mane kahe, 'mArI choDIo to bahu DAhI.' meM kahyuM, 'hA, sarasa.' pachI e bhAI bIjI choDIonI TIkA karavA mAMDyA. tyAre meM temane kahyuM, 'TIkA zuM karavA karo cho lokonI ? tame lokonI TIkA karazo to tamArI hau loko TIkA karaze.' tyAre e kahe che, "mArAmAM TIkA karavA jevuM che zuM ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, 'dekhADuM, cUpa rahejo." pachI choDIonI copaDIo lAvIne dekhADyuM badhuM. juo A, kahyuM. tyAre e kahe, "heM !!! meM kahyuM, "cUpa thaI jAva. koInI TIkA karazo nahIM. huM jANuM chuM to ya huM tamArI joDe kema cUpa rahyo chuM ? ATaluM badhuM tame ropha mAro cho to ya huM cUpa kema rahyo chuM ?" huM jANuM ke bhale, ropha mArIne paNa saMtoSa rahe che ne, emane ! paNa jyAre TIkA karavA mAMDI tyAre kahyuM ke, "nA karazo TIkA.... kAraNa ke choDIonA bApa thaIne ApaNe ko'kanI choDIonI TIkA karIe e bhUmsa che. chokarIonA bApa nA hoya, jene choDIo nA hoya, te AvI TIkA kare ja nahIM bicAro. A chokarIovALA bahu TIkA kare. tyAre tuM choDIono bApa thaIne TIkA kare che ? tamane zarama nathI AvatI ? evo saMzaya rAkhe kyAre pAra Ave ? ane AjanI choDIo ya bicArI eTalI bhoLI hoya che ke mArA bApA koI dahADo DAyarI nahIM vAMce evuM mAne. enI 'skUla'nI lakhavAnI DAyarI hoya ne, enI mahIM patro mUke. enA bApe ya bhoLA hoya, te choDI para vizvAsa ja AvyA kare. paNa huM to A badhuM jANuM ke A choDIo uMmaralAyaka thaI che. huM enA 'phAdhara'eTaluM ja kahuM ke Ane paiNAvI dejo vahelI. hA, bIjuM zuM kahuM te !! ceto, choDIonAM mA-bApa ! eka amAro khAsa sago hato, tene cAra choDIo hatI. te jAgrata bahu. te mane kahe, 'A choDIo moTI thaI, kolejamAM gaI, te mane vizvAsa nathI raheto.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'joDe jajo. kolejamAM joDe jaIe ane e kolejamAMthI nIkaLe tyAre pAchaLa Avaje. e to eka dahADo jaIza, paNa bIjI vakhata zuM karIza ? vahune mokalaje.' alyA, vizvAsa kyAM rAkhavo ne kyAM rAkhavo nahIM eTaluM ya nathI samajato ?! ahIMthI ApaNe kahI devAnuM, 'bena jo, ApaNe sArAM mANasa, ApaNe khAnadAna, kuLavAna chIe.' Ama ene ApaNe cetavI devAnuM. pachI je banyuM e 'karekTa.' zaMkA nahIM karavAnI. keTalA zaMkA karatA haze ? je jAgrata hoya, te zaMkA karyA kare. DobAne to zaMkA ja nahIM karavAnI ne ! mATe game tevI zaMkA to utpanna thatAM pahelAM ja tene ukhADIne pheMkI devI. A to A choDIo bahAra pharavA jAya, ramavA jAya, enI zaMkA kare ane zaMkA utpanna thaI ke tyAM sukha ApaNane bahu varte kharuM ? praznakartA : nA, paNa pachI zaMkA karavAno artha nathI. dAdAzrI : hA, basa, eTale game tevuM kAraNa hoya to ya paNa zaMkA utpanna thavA devI nahIM. sAvadhAnI rAkhavI, paNa zaMkA nA karavI. zaMkA kare ke "maraNa' AvyuM jANo. praznakartA : paNa zaMkA to enI potAnI meLe ja utpanna thAya che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, paNa e bhayaMkara ajJAnatA che. enAthI bahu duHkha paDe. chokarIo bahAra gaI hoya to koI kaheze ke ene eno 'phrenDa' maLyo che. eTale pAchI chokarIo upara zaMkA paDI, te zo svAda thAya ? praznakartA : basa, pachI azAMti rahyA kare. dAdAzrI : azAMti kare tethI bahAra ThekANe paDI javAnuM che ? 'phrenDa' joDe phare che, temAM kaMI pheraphAra thaI javAno che ? pheraphAra kaMI thAya nahIM ane e zaMkAthI ja marI jAya ! eTale A zaMkA utpanna thAya ke tarata ja 'dAdAe nA pADI che" eTaluM yAda karIne baMdha karI devI. bAkI, sAvadhAnI badhI rAkhavI. lokone potAnI choDIo to hoya ne ? tyAre e 'koleja'mAM nA

Page #69
AptavANI-9 jAya ? jamAno evo che, eTale kolejamAM jAya ne ? A kaMI pahelAMno jamAno che ke choDIone gharamAM besADI rAkhavAnI ?! eTale jevo jamAno e pramANe vartavuM paDe ne ?! jo bIjI choDIo enAM 'phrenDa' sAthe vAta kare, tyAre A choDIo ya evuM enA 'phrenDa' sAthe vAta nA kare ? 87 have choDIonI jyAre kaMIka evI vAta sAMbhaLavAmAM ke jovAmAM Ave ne zaMkA paDe tyAre enI kharI majhA (!) Ave. ane mane AvIne pUche to tarata kahI dauM ke zaMkA kADhI nAkha. A to te joyuM tethI zaMkA paDI ane nA joyuM hota to ?! jovAthI ja jo zaMkA paDI che to nathI joyuM ema karIne 'karekTa' karI nAkhane ! A to 'aMDaragrAunDa'mAM badhuM che ja. paNa ene manamAM ema thAya ke 'Ama haze to ?" to e vaLagyuM ene. pachI bhUtAM choDe nahIM ene, AkhI rAta choDe nahIM. rAtre ya choDe nahIM, mahinA-mahinA sudhI choDe nahIM. eTale zaMkA rAkhIe te khoTuM che. zaMkA ? tahIM, saMbhALa lo !! have eka cAra choDIono bApa salAha levA Avyo hato. e kahe che, 'mArI A cAra choDIo kolejamAM bhaNavA jAya che, te e badhI zaMkA to Ave ja ne ! to mAre zuM karavuM A cAra choDIonuM ? choDI bagaDI jAya to zuM karuM ?" meM kahyuM, 'paNa ekalI zaMkA karavAthI sudharaze nahIM.' alyA, zaMkA nA lAvIza. ghera Ave tyAre ghera beThAM beThAM enI joDe kaMI sArI vAtocIto karIe, ApaNe 'phrenDazipa' karIe. ene AnaMda thAya evI vAto karIe joIe. ane tuM phakta dhaMdhAmAM, paisA mATe paDyo che evuM nA karIza. pahelAM chokarIonuM sAcava. enI joDe 'phrenDazipa' karIe. enI sAthe jarA nAsto karIe, jarA cA pIe, te prema jevuM che. A prema to uparacoTiyo rAkho cho, eTale pachI e prema bahAra khoLe che. pachI meM kahyuM ke, ane tema chatAM ya choDIne koI joDe prema thaI gayo, to e pachI rAte sADA agiyAra vAge Ave, to tame kADhI mUko ? tyAre e kahe, 'hA, huM to geTa AuTa karI dauM. ene gharamAM pesavA ja nA dauM.' meM kahyuM, 'nA karazo evuM. e kone tyAM jaze rAtre ? e kone tyAM Azaro 88 AptavANI-9 leze ?" ene kahIe, 'Ava, besa, sUI jA.' pelo kAyado che ne, ke nukasAna to gayuM, paNa have ethI vadhu nukasAna na jAya eTalA mATe sAcavavuM joIe. e bena kaMIka nukasAna karIne AvI ane vaLI pAchAM ApaNe kADhI mUkIe eTale to thaI rahyuM ne ! lAkho rUpiyAnI khoTa to javA mAMDI che, paNa temAM khoTa ochI jAya evuM karIe ke vadhI jAya evuM karIe ? khoTa javA ja mAMDI che, to eno upAya to hovo ja joIe ne ? eTale bahu khoTa karIza nahIM. tuM tArI meLe ene ghera sUvADI deje. ane pachI bIje dahADe samajaNa pADI daIe ke 'TAImasara Avaje, mane bahu du:kha thAya che ane pachI mAruM hArTapheIla thaI jaze.' kahIe. eTale ema tema karIne samajAvI devAnuM. pachI e samajI gayo. rAte kADhI mele to koNa rAkhe pachI ? loko kaMInuM kaMI karI nAkhe. pachI khalAsa thaI gayuM badhuM. rAte eka vAge kADhI mUke to choDI kevI lAcArI anubhave bicArI ?! ane A kaLiyugano mAmalo, jarA vicAra to karavo joIe ne ?! eTale koI phero choDI rAte moDI Ave to paNa zaMkA nA karIe, zaMkA kADhI nAkhIe, to keTalo phAyado kare ? vagara kAmanI bhaDaka rAkhyAno zo artha che ? eka avatAramAM kazo pheraphAra thavAno nathI. pelI chokarIone vagara kAmanuM duHkha dezo nahIM, chokarAone duHkha dezo nahIM. phakta moDhe ema kahevuM kharuM ke, 'bena, tuM bahAra jAya che, te moDuM nA thavuM joIe. ApaNe khAnadAna gAmanAM, ApaNane A zobhe nahIM. mATe ATaluM moDuM nA karazo.' Ama tema badhI vAtacIta karavI, samajAvIe, karIe. paNa zaMkA karye pAlave nahIM ke 'konI joDe pharatI haze, zuM karatI haze.' ane pachI rAte bAra vAge Ave to ya pAchuM bIje dahADe kahevAnuM ke, 'bena, AvuM nA thavuM joIe.' tene jo kADhI mUkIe to e kone tyAM jaze, enuM ThekANuM nahIM. tamane samaja paDIne ? phAyado zemAM ? ochAmAM ochuM nukasAna thAya emAM phAyadone ?! eTale meM badhAne kahyuM che ke moDI Ave to ya choDIone gharamAM pesavA dejo, emane kADhI nA mUkazo. nahIM to bahArathI kADhI mele, A kaDaka mijAjanA loko evAM kharAM ke ? kALa kevo vicitra che ! keTalo baLatarAvALo kALa che !! ne pAcho A kaLiyuga che, eTale gharamAM besADIne pachI samajAvavuM.

Page #70
AptavANI-9 mokSamArgIya saMyama ! eTale ApaNe zuM kahyuM ke phAIlono samabhAve nikAla karo. A badhI phAIlo che. A kaMI tamArI choDI nathI ke A tamArI vahu nathI. A vahu-choDIo e badhI 'phAIlo' che. 'phAIlono samabhAve nikAla karo. jyAre pakSAghAta thayo hoya ne, tyAre koI tamAruM saguM thAya nahIM. UlaTuM bahu dahADA thAya ne, to loka badhA ciDhAyA kare. pelo pakSAghAtavALo ye mahIM manamAM samajI jAya ke badhAM ciDhAyA kare che. paNa zuM kare che ?! A 'dAdAe dekhADelo mokSa sIdho che, eka avatArI che. mATe saMyamamAM raho ne 'phAIlono samabhAve nikAla karo. chokarI hoya ke bairI hoya, ke bIjuM hoya ke trIjuM hoya, paNa badhAno samabhAve nikAla karo. koI koInI chokarI hotI nathI duniyAmAM. A badhuM karmanA udayane AdhIna che. ane 'jJAna' nA maLyuM hoya tene ApaNAthI AvuM kazuM kahevAya nahIM. AvuM bole to to e vaDhavA taiyAra thaI jAya. have mokSa kyAre bagaDaze ? mahIM asaMyama thaze tyAre ! asaMyama thAya evuM ApaNuM 'jJAna' ja nathI. niraMtara saMyamavALuM 'jJAna' che. phakta zaMkA karI ke upAdhi AvI ! mATe, eka to zaMkA rAkhavI - kaMI paNa zaMkAzIla banavuM e moTAmAM moTo guno che. nava choDIonA bApane niHzaMka pharatA meM joyelA ane te ya bhayaMkara kaLiyugamAM ! ane naveya choDIo paiNI. A zaMkAmAM rahyo hota to keTalo jIvata e ?! mATe koI dahADo zaMkA nA karavI. zaMkA kare to ene potAne khoTa jAya. praznakartA : zaMkAmAM kevI khoTa jAya che ? e jarA phoDa pADo ne ! dAdAzrI : zaMkA, du:kha ja che ne ! pratyakSa duHkha !! e kaMI ochI khoTa kahevAya ? zaMkAmAM vadhAre Utare to maraNatola duHkha thAya. praznakartA : e zalyanI jema rahe ? dAdAzrI : zalya to sAruM. paNa zaMkAmAM to ethI vadhAre bhAre duHkha hoya. zalya to ko'ka bIjI vastu AmAM pesI gaI hoya to kheMcyA kare eTaluM ja ane 90 AptavANI-9 zaMkA to mArI nAkhe mANasane, saMtApa Ubho kare eTale zaMkA nA karavI. zaMkA mATe upAya ! bAkI, zaMkA vagara to mANasa hoya ja nahIM ne ! are, mane to pahelAM, bA jIvatA hatAM ne, tyAre gADImAMthI UtaratAM ja, vaDodarA sTezane ja ema vicAra Ave ke 'bA Aje ociMtA marI gayAM haze, to poLamAM zI rIte pesavuM ?" evI zaMkAo utpanna thAya. are, jAtajAtanI zaMkAo mANasamAM Ave. paNa A badhuM zodhakhoLa karIne pachI meM meLavI lIdheluM ke A kara mIMDa ne mela cokaDI ! zaMkA utpanna karavA jevuM jagata ja nathI. praznakartA : e to mane paNa dezamAMthI Teliphona Ave to mane haju ya zaMkA thAya ke 'bAne kaMIka thayuM haze to ?" dAdAzrI : paNa e zaMkA kazI 'helpa" nathI karatI, duHkha Ape che. A gharaDuM mANasa kyAre paDI jAya, e zuM kahevAya !! kAraNa ke ochA ApaNe emane bacAvI zakavAnA chIe ?! ane evI zaMkA paDavAnI thAya che tyAre ApaNe emanA AtmAne, emanA upara vidhi mUkyA karavI, ke he nAmadhArI bA, emanAM dravyakarma, bhAvakarma, nokarmathI bhinna evA pragaTa zuddhAtmA, emanA AtmAne zAMti Apo." eTale zaMkA thatAM pahelAM ApaNe A vidhi mUkI devI. zaMkA thAya tyAre ApaNe Ama pheravavuM. vyavasthita'thI tiHzaMkatA ! jagata vadhAre du:khI to zaMkAthI ja che. zaMkA to mANasane adhogatimAM laI jAya che. zaMkAmAM kazuM vaLe nahIM. kAraNa ke 'vyavasthita'nA niyamane koI toDanAruM nathI. 'vyavasthita'nA niyamane koI toDI zake ema nathI, mATe zaMkA karIne zuM karavA amathI mAthAkUTa kare che ? 'vyavasthita'no artha zo ke "che" e che, 'nathI' e nathI. "che" e che, e 'nathI' thavAnuM nathI ane 'nathI' e nathI, e "che' thavAnuM nathI. mATe "che' e che, emAM tuM AghuMpAchuM karavA jaIza to che ja ane 'nathI" te AghuMpAchuM karavA jaIza to ya 'nathI" ja. mATe niHzaMka thaI jAva. A

Page #71
92 AptavANI-9 jJAna" pachI tame have AtmAmAM niHzaMka thaI gayA ke A ApaNane je lakSa beThuM, te ja AtmA che ne bIjuM badhuM nikAlI bAbata ! Ama vyavasthita' vApare ne, to keTalAMka bhAvo utpanna nA thAya. jema thavAnuM haze tema thaze' ema nA bolAya. 'che e che ne 'nathI' e nathI. ema jo samajI jAya ne to zaMkA nA rahe. ne zaMkA thAya to bhUsI nAkhe pAchuM, ke bhAI, 'che' e che, emAM zaMkA zA mATe ? 'nathI' e nathI, emAM zaMkA zA mATe ? ke 'Avaze ke nahIM Ave, Avaze ke nahIM Ave ? khoTa bhAMgaze ke nahIM bhAMgaze ?" alyA, 'nathI' e nathI. jo bhAMgavAnI nathI, to 'nathI' e nathI ja bhAMgavAnI ane bhAMgavAnI che to bhAMgI jaze. to e bAjunI kyAM bhAMjagaDa karuM ? eTale 'natha' e nathI ane 'che" e che, eTale zaMkA ja rAkhavAnuM kaMI kAraNa nathI. 'vyavasthita'nA arthamAM evuM nA bolAya ke je thavAnuM haze te thaze, vAMdho nathI. jema thavAnuM haze tema ja thaze, evuM nA bolAya. e to ekAMtika vAkya kahevAya. e durupayoga karyo kahevAya. A mana, buddhi badhAM ajJa svabhAvanAM che ane jyAM sudhI virodhIo che tyAM sudhI ApaNe jAgrata rahevuM paDe ne ! praznakartA : ApaNane bhaviSyakALanI ciMtA thAya ke phalANuM Ama thaze, te Ama thAya to sAruM. to pachI evA TANe ema nA kahI zake ke 'vyavasthitamAM haze tema thaze, tuM zuM kAma ciMtA kare che ? dAdAzrI : "vyavasthita'mAM haze ema thaze evuM bolavAnI jarUra nahIM. paNa 'che' e che ane 'nathI" e nathI. eTale e saMbaMdhI vicAravAnuM ja rahyuM nahIM ne ! 'natha' e che' thavAnuM nathI ane "che" e 'nathI' thavAnuM nathI, pachI vicAravAnuM ja rahyuM nahIM ne ! e saMbaMdhI niHzaMka thaI gayo ne ! ane bhaviSyakALa 'vyavasthita'nA tAbAmAM che. ApaNA tAbAmAM che. ja kyAM ?! 'vyavasthita'mAM haze tema thaze, evuM kahevAnI jarUra nathI. paNa ApaNe "che" e che ne 'nathI' e nathI, evuM kahIe. AMgaLImAM saheja AptavANI-9 vAgavAnuM hoya to 'che" to thaze ne 'nathI" to nahIM thAya. eTale 'nathI' e nathI ane thaze teno ApaNane vAMdho nathI. ane jagate ya vAMdho UThAvIne kyAM jAya ?! vicArothI ke koI evo puruSArtha nathI ke jenAthI e phare. eTale je 'che' e che ne 'nathI" e nathI. paNa ajJAnI jo Ano artha avaLo kare to nukasAna karI bese. ApaNane to A "jJAna" che, tene mATe vAta che A ! jema A bhagavAne kahelAM tattvo te che eTalAM ja nakkI karI rAkhyA che ne ane 'nathI' tene nathI kahyA. tevuM AmAM 'che" e che. ApaNe atyArathI AvA vicAra karIe ke gAMjo nA maLe to have zuM karIzuM ? vakhate be mahinA-traNa mahinA nA maLyo, eTale pachI AkhI jiMdagI na maLe to have zuM upAya karIe ? evuM kaMI guNAkAra karavAnI jarUra che. ApaNe ? guNAkAra karIe ke ATalAM ATalAM vALa thAya to zuM karIe ? eTale zaMkA nahIM paDe to koI duHkha Avaze nahIM. zaMkA ja nA rahe to pachI zuM ?! ane zaMkA Ave to ya ene ApaNe khaseDI melIe. "tame zuM karavA Avo cho ? ame chIe ne ? tamAre salAha ApavAnI koNe kahI che ? ame have koI vakIlanI salAha nathI letA ane koInI ya salAha ame letA nathI. ame to 'dAdAnI salAha laIe, basa ! jyAre je roga thAya tyAre 'dAdA'ne dekhADI daIe ame ane amAre salAha, 'noTiso' koIne ApavI nathI, loko amane bhale Ape." ane te 'vyavasthita'nI bahAra kazuM karavAnuM che kaMI ? to khAtarI thaI gaI che ne, 'vyavasthita'nI bahAra koI kazuM kare nahIM ? mokSe javuM hoya, to.... eTale zaMkA to koInI upare ya nA karavI. ApaNe ghera gayA hoya ne gharamAM ApaNI bena joDe koI bIjo mANasa vAta karato hoya, to ya zaMkA nA karavI. zaMkA e to moTAmAM moTuM du:kha Ape ane te AkhuM 'jJAna' uDADI de, pheMkI de. 'vyavasthita'nI bahAra kazuM ja thavAnuM nathI. ane te ghaDIe ApaNe benane kahIe, 'ahIM Ava bena, mane jamavAnuM ApI de.' Ama pelAM bannevane judA pADI zakAya. paNa zaMkA to kyAreya paNa

Page #72
AptavANI-9 nA karAya. zaMkAthI duHkha ja UbhuM thAya che. 'vyavasthita'mAM thavAnuM che, te thaze. paNa zaMkA nahIM rAkhavI. praznakartA : paNa zaMkA, e paNa udayakarmane lIdhe ja haze ne ? dAdAzrI : zaMkA rAkhavI e udayakarma nA kahevAya. zaMkA rAkhavI e to tAro bhAva bagaDe che, te emAM hAtha ghAlyo. eTale e du:kha ja Ape. zaMkA kyAreya paNa nA karavI. ApaNI bena joDe koI vAta karato hoya, paNa have ApaNe to mokSe javuM che to ApaNe zaMkAmAM paDavuM nahIM. jo ApaNe mokSe javuM che to. kAraNa ke eka bhavamAM to 'vyavasthita'nI bahAra kazuM thavAnuM nathI, tame jAgrata hazo to ya nathI thavAnuM ane ajAgrata hazo to ya nathI thavAnuM. ane jJAnI hazo to ye pheraphAra nathI thavAno ane ajJAnI hazo to ye pheraphAra nathI thavAno. eTale zaMkA rAkhavAnuM koI kAraNa nathI. praznakartA : kAraNa ke kaMI pheraphAra paDavAno ja nathI. dAdAzrI : hA, pharaka paDavAno nathI ane bahu nukasAna che e zaMkAmAM to. praznakartA : paNa A 'jJAna' pachI to 'cArjiMga' thavAnuM ja nathI ne ? dAdAzrI : "cArjiga' nA thAya. paNa AvuM zaMkA rAkhe to 'cArjiMga' thAya. jo mokSa joIto hoya to zaMkA karAya nahIM. nahIM to ya peluM ajJAnatAmAM to evuM ja thaze. ane A to "jJAna"no lAbha maLe che, muktino lAbha maLe che ane 'che' te ja thAya che. mATe zaMkA rAkhavAnuM koI kAraNa nathI. zaMkA bilakula choDI devAnI. 'dAdA'e zaMkA karavAnI nA pADI che. e to potAnI ja tirbaLatA praznakartA : e zaMkAthI pahelAM potAno ja AtmaghAta thAya che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, zaMkAthI to potAne ja, karanArane ja nukasAna ! sAmAne zuM levAdevA che ? sAmAne zuM nukasAna ? sAmAne to kaMI paDelI 94 AptavANI-9 nathI. sAmo to kaheze ke mAruM to je thavAnuM haze te thaze, tame zuM karavA zaMkA karo cho ? have tame to zaMkA karo e tamArI nirbaLatA che. nirbaLatA to manuSyamAM hoya ja, saheje ya hoya. nirbaLatA nA hoya to vAta ja judI che. bAkI, nirbaLatA saheje ya hoya ja manuSya mAtrane ! e nirbaLatA gaI ke bhagavAna thaI gayo !! eka ja vastu che, nirbaLatA gaI e ja bhagavAna ! zaMkA suNatA gebI jAduthI ! amArI para koIkane zaMkA Avene, to pachI e choDe ke ene ? UMghamAM ya ene pajava pajava kare. amAruM zuddha khAtuMne, eTale badhAnuM zuddha karI Ape. amArI para zaMkA thAya to ya teno amane vAMdho nathI. zaMkA thAya e badhI enI potAnI nabaLAIo che. tethI kavirAje lakhyuM che ne, ke viparIta buddhinI zaMkA, te sUNatA gebI jAduthI, chatAM amane nathI daMDyA, na kariyA bheda 'huM' 'tuM thI. zuM kahevA mAge che kavirAja ? 'dAdA' upara zaMkA AvI, e kyAre Ave ? viparIta buddhi hoya to zaMkA Ave. eka phero evuM baneluM ke ahIM to badhAnA mAthA upara hAtha Ama mUkIe chIe ne, evuM eka strInA mAthA upara hAtha mUkyo hato. enA dhaNInA manamAM vahema paDyo. pharI koI phero khabhe hAtha mUkAI gayo haze, te ene pharI vahema paDyo. 'dAdA'nI draSTi bagaDI gaI lAge che, evuM enA manamAM ghUsI gayuM. huM to samajuM ke A bhalA AdamIne vahema paDyo che, e vahemano upAya to, have zuM thAya te ?! eTale duHkhI thato haze ema mAnuM. pachI eNe mane kAgaLa lakhyo ke, 'dAdAjI, mane AvuM du:kha thAya che. AvuM nA karo to sAruM. tamArAthI, jJAnI puruSathI AvuM nA thAya." pAcho mane bhego thAya, mArA sAmuM jue, tyAre enA manamAM ema thAya ke 'dAdAjI" para koI asara dekhAtI ja nathI. pachI be-traNa dahADA pachI

Page #73
AptavANI-9 pharI e bhego thayo. tyAre amAre to jANe kazuM banyuM nathI, evI rIte ame to 'saccidAnaMda' karyA. evuM pAMca-sAta vakhata banyuM. te kaMI asara nA dekhAya, eTale manamAM e thAkI gayo. ene mahIM gabharAmaNa thaI gaI, ke 'A zuM ? kAgaLa lakhyA pachI pahoMcyo, pachI vAMcIne Ave che, to ya paNa kazI asara to dekhAtI nathI.' alyA, gunegArane asara dekhAya. gunegArane 'iphekTa' thAya. amane 'IphekTa' ja zAnI ? te ame gunegAra ja nathI tyAM AgaLa ! tuM game teTalA kAgaLa lakhe ke game te kare to mane vAMdho nathI. kAgaLano javAba ja nathI mArI pAse. mAre vItarAgatA che. A to tuM tArA manamAM evuM samajI bese che. e pachI mane kahe che, "tamane kazuM thayuM hatuM ?" meM kahyuM, "mane zuM thAya te ? tane zaMkA paDI che. paNa 'huM' emAM chuM ja nahIM ne ! eTale mane vAMdho ja nathI ne !'' 95 eTale e gaibI jAdu lakhyuM. have tyAM AgaLa lokone asara thaI jAya, pelo kAgaLa lakhe to ? praznakartA : hA, bIjo koI hoya to e hAlI jAya. dAdAzrI : pachI e ziSyanuM zuM thaI jAya ? ane A to gobo ja paDyo nathI ene ane enI 'vAIpha'ne ya gobo nathI paDyo, kazuM koIne ya gobo paDyo nahIM ane vakhata jato rahyo. zaMkAno vakhata to jato raheze ne, eka dahADo ? zaMkA kaMI kAyama rahetI haze ? kavie bahu bhAre vAkya lakhyuM che ne, ke zaMkA kevI che ? sAcI zaMkA nathI A, paNa viparIta buddhinI zaMkA che A ! ane ame 'jJAnIpuruSa', te amArI upare ya zaMkA karI ? jyAM badhuM niHzaMka thavAnuM, je puruSe ApaNane niHzaMka karyA, tenI upare ya zaMkA ?! paNa A to jagata che, zuM nA kahe ?! te zaMkA pAcho huM sUNuM, te ya gaibI jAduthI ane pachI pAcho vItarAgatAthI jouM ! chatAM tathI daMDyA 'huM' 'tuM' thI ! pachI kavi zuM kahe che ? 96 AptavANI-9 chatAM amane nathI daMDyA, na kariyA bheda 'huM' 'tuM' thI. hA, jarAya daMDa Apyo nathI ne 'huM-tuM' karyuM nathI ke 'tuM Avo che, tuM Ama kema kare che, mArI para AvI zaMkA kema kare che !' evuM kazuM nahIM. huM jANuM ke Ama ja hoya e to, ene samajaphera thayelI che. ApaNA satsaMgamAM 'huM-tuM' thayeluM nathI, 'huM-tuM'no bheda paDyo nathI. 'huM-tuM'no bheda A keTalAMya varSothI paDyo nathI, ahIM koI jagyAe. doSa to ghaNuM karIne svAbhAvika rIte mANasane Ave ja. e doSano bharelo hoya to kyAM jAya bicAro ?! paNa emAM 'tuM Avo che' evuM ame nathI bolyA. 'huM ne tuM' kahIe eTale bheda paDI gayo. thaI rahyuM pachI ! ane A to badhuM abheda ! tamane lAgyuM ne, evuM abheda ?! eTale 'teM Ama kema karyuM' evuM tevuM kazuM ya nahIM. mAre evI judAI che ja nahIM. nahIM to zaMkA kare ne, to bheda paDI jAya. ane A bAbatamAM zaMkA, e to bahu moTI vasamI vastu che ! eTale A vAkya bahu moTuM che. tuM Avo kema, teM Ama kema karyuM, 'huM-tuM' evuM juduM nA pADe. 'huM-tuM' ApaNe ahIM bolyA ja nathI. ApaNA A pacAsa hajAra mANasamAM 'huM-tuM' bolyA ja nathI. praznakartA : paNa badhAM dharmasthAnakonI aMdara 'huM-tuM'nA bheda ja jovA maLe che ne ? dAdAzrI : e ja hoya ne ! bIjuM zuM hoya ?! jyAM sudhI 'huM-tuM'nA bheda che tyAM sudhI jIvAtmA che. 'huM-tuM'no abheda thaI gayo e paramAtmA thayo. paramAtmA, vaLI emAM bIjuM kyAMthI lAve ? paNa ene paramAtmA thavuM nA hoya tyAM sudhI 'huM-tuM' karyA kare. eTale viparIta buddhinI zaMkA karI haze to ya paNa 'huM-tuM'nA bheda nathI pADyA. nahIM to jagata AkhuM to vaDhI vaDhIne tela kADhI nAkhe ke 'tuM nAlAyaka che. Ama che, tema che.' te badhe ja, 'evarIvhera !' ahIM sivAya badhe ja !! A apavAda mArga che, badhI rIte apavAda mArga che. badhe to 'huM-tuM'nA bheda paDI jAya. praznakartA : ame zaMkA tamArI upara karIe tenI tamane khabara paDI

Page #74
98 AptavANI-9 karavA jevuM jagata ja nathI ne !' dAdAzrI : zaMkAthI ja A jagata UbhuM thayuM che. zaMkAthI, verathI, amuka amuka evA zabdo che, jenA para jagata UbhuM rahyuM che. koInI upara zaMkA karavI tenA karatAM ene be dhola mArI devI sArI, paNa zaMkA nA karavI. dhola mArIe to pariNAma Ave jhaTa, pelo sAme cAra Ape ne ? paNa zaMkAnuM pariNAma to potAne ekalAne ja ! pote khADo khode ne mahIM UMDAM UtaravAnuM, pharI bahAra nIkaLAya nahIM. A badhI pIDAo zaMkAthI UbhI thaI che. tamane A bhAI upara zaMkA Ave ke "e bhAIe Ama karyuM.' e zaMkA ja tamane karaDI khAya. have vakhate evuM karyuM hoya ne zaMkA AvatI hoya, to ya ApaNe zaMkAne kahIe, 'he zaMkA, tuM jatI rahe have. A to mAro bhAI che.' thApaNa mUkyA pachI zaMkA ?! AptavANI-9 jAya, chatAM Apa zAthI bheda nathI pADatA ? dAdAzrI : te ame jANIe ke A mULo che te Avo soDhe (gaMdhAya), A DuMgaLI che te AvI soDhe. e badhuM nA samajIe ? pachI e soDhe temAM ApaNe ene vaDhIe to khoTuM nA dekhAya ?! e che ja DuMgaLI, temAM zuM vaDhavA jevuM ?! mULAne mULAnA svabhAvanI sugaMdhI hoya ja. DuMgaLI hoya te peNe AgaLa bUmAbUma karatI hoya to ahIM AgaLa soDhe, te eno svabhAva che. ene ame jANIe ke e A svabhAvano che. kAraNa ke ame UMdhuM karavA jaIe to enA parathI kRpA jatI rahene eTale enuM ahita thaI jAya. jenuM hita karavA beThA, tenuM ja ahita kyuM. eTale ame to, amArI jiMdagIno parizrama ja Avo che ke ame je jhADa ropI dIdhuM hoya, pachI 'plAniMga' kare ne e jhADa roDa vacce AvatuM hoya, to ya paNa e jhADane ame nA kApIe, pachI roDa pheravavo ja rahyo ! amAruM ropeluM, amAruM pANI chAMTeluM ne amArA ucherelA e jhADane ame kADhIe nahIM. paNa e roDane ja pheravavo rahyo. pahelethI ja paddhati ja amArI e jAtanI che ke amArA hAthe ropAyeluM amArA hAthe ukhaDavuM nA joIe. bAkI, jIvo to badhI bahu jAtanA bhegA thavAnA ne ! A to pAra vagaranI zaMkAo ! zaMkA, zaMkA, heMDatA cAlatA zaMkAvALuM jagata ! ane koIthI bhUleca ke koI phalANAbhAInI 'vAIpha' upara hAtha mukAI gayo, e zaMkA paDI ! tenI to ghera vaDhavADo pAra vagaranI cAle che. have pelI baIno kazo doSa nathI, chatAM ya vaDhavADo pAra vagaranI cAle. have A lokone kyAM pahoMcI vaLAya te ?! eTale ApaNo hAtha mukAI gayo to niHzaMkapaNAthI e zaMkAne uDADI devI. zaMkA zenAthI bhAgI nAkhavAnI ? niHzaMkapaNAthI ! te 'dAdA'nA niHzaMkapaNAthI zaMkA gaI ema kahIe. zaMkA karavA karatAM..... bAkI, jagatamAM moTAmAM moTo roga hoya to zaMkA ! praznakartA : paNa ApanuM A vAkya bahu jabarajasta moTuM che. 'zaMkA praznakartA : eka mANase mane gALa bhAMDI. paNa have eNe mane gALa bhAMDI nathI, evuM to mArAthI zI rIte manAya ? mAruM mana kevI rIte mAne ? dAdAzrI : evuM kahevAya ja nahIM ne ! gALa bhAMDI che, e to bhAMDI ja che ne ! eno savAla nathI. paNa ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ? enI upara zaMkA nA hovI joIe. ApaNe gADImAM pacAsa hajAra rUpiyA koIne mUkavA ApyA ane kahIe ke 'jarA huM saMDAsa jAuM chuM.' ane pachI saMDAsamAM zaMkA paDI to ? are, pAMca lAkha rUpiyA ApyA hoya ane zaMkA paDe ne, to zaMkAne kahIe ke, 'have tuM cAlI jA. meM ApyA e ApyA. e javAnA hoya to jAya ane rahevAnA hoya to rahe !" zaMkA to vagara kAmanI sAmA para doSa baMdhAvaDAve. ane mArA jevAne jo kadI rUpiyA ApyA hoya ne pelo zaMkA rAkhe to enI zI dazA thAya ? eTale koI jagyAe bilakula zaMkA karavA jevuM jagata ja nathI. dhIreluM yAda AvyuM te ! rAtre sUvA gayo, agiyAra vAgyA hoya ane oDhIne sUI gayo

Page #75
AptavANI-9 ne tarata vicAra Avyo ke "A pelA lAkha rUpiyAnuM khAtuM pADavAnuM rahI gayuM. e khAtuM nahIM pADI Ape to zuM thaze ?" to thaI rahyuM ! thaI rahyuM kAma (!) bhaInuM !! pachI maDaduM jIvatuM hoya ne, enA jevuM che pachI ! have ko'kane lAkha rUpiyA dhIryA hoya ne e vyAja mahine hajAra rUpiyA ApyA karato hoya. tene have be-traNa lAkha rUpiyAnI khoTa gaI. paNa eNe vyAja to mokalyuM, eTale ApaNe jANyuM ke vyAja to mokalyuM che. paNa jyArathI ApaNane zaMkA pese ke 'A khoTa gaI che to vakhata mUDI ja nahIM Ape tyAre zuM karIza ? have lAkha rUpiyA pAchA Avaze ke nahIM ?" e vicAra pakaDyo pachI eno kyAre aMta Ave ? zaMkA hoya tyAM sudhI aMta Ave ja nahIM, eTale e mANasanuM maraNa thavAnuM. pachI rAtre game tyAre tamane zaMkA Ave e bAbatanI ke lAkha rUpiyA nahIM Ave to zuM thaze ? Akho dahADo tamane zaMkA nA AvI ne rAtre jyAre zaMkA AvI tyAre duHkha thAya che ane Akho divasa zaMkA nA AvI eTale zuM te ghaDIe duHkha nahotuM? rUpiyA ApyA hoya, pachI 'pAchA Apaze ke nahIM? enI zaMkA utpanna thAya, to tamane duHkha thAya ne ? to zaMkA A ghaDIe kema thaI ne pahelAM kema nA thaI ? praznakartA : enuM zuM kAraNa ? dAdAzrI : A murkhAI ApaNI. jo zaMkA karavI hoya to kAyama zaMkA karo, eTalI badhI jAgRtipUrvaka zaMkA karo, ene rUpiyA ApIe tyArathI ja zaMkA karo. 100 AptavANI-9 do, rUpiyA AvI gayA !" kahI dauM. A khoTa khAvI tenA karatAM ApaNe rakama jame karI levI sArI khAnagImAM, pelo jANe nahIM evI rIte ! nahIM to lokone to jyotiSI kahe ne, to ya mAne. jayotiSa kahe, 'juo, zuM sarasa graha che badhA. tamane kazuM thavAnuM nathI. rUpiyA pAchAM AvI jaze." eTale pAchuM evuM mAne. enI potAnI ye 'sTebiliTI' nathI. e joSI ApaNuM zuM joto hato ? ene enuM jotAM nathI AvaDatuM, te ApaNuM zuM jovAno e ?! enA pagamAM aradhAM aradhAM caMpala che, thoDAM thoDAM pAchaLa ghasAI gayelAM che. to ye evAM caMpala pahere che. to ApaNe nA samajIe ke alyA, tAruM ja jyotiSa jotAM tane nathI AvaDatuM, to tuM mAruM zuM jovAno hato te ? paNa A to lAlacu lokone badhA phasAve. ahIMnA joSIo to kyAM sudhI pahoMcI gayA che ?! moTA sAhebo, badhA ya mAne. are, manAtuM haze ? joSIone gharamAM pesavA devAya ? gharamAM pesavA dIdhA to gharamAM rokakaLa thAya. eTale ene pesavA ya nA devAya. hA, ene kahIe jyotiSa, jovA mATe nahIM, ema ne ema Avajo. mAre tyAM AvIne jyotiSa jozo nahIM koInA, kapALa joI nA lezo ke AnI Ama rekhAo che, jema che ema rahevA dejo. amane, A amAre dudhapAka banAvavo che ATalA dUdhano, emAM chAMTA nAkhazo nahIM. hA, A to koIne khabara paDatI nathI ke zuM thavAnuM che, to tane zI rIte khabara paDI ?! niHzaMktA, tyAM kArya siddhi ! eTale vahema paDe to duHkha paDe. copaDA jotA nA AvaDe to, hoya sATha lAkhano napho ne ene dekhAya cALIsa lAkhanI khoTa. te pachI ene du:kha ja lAgyA kare ne, copaDA jotA nA AvaDe tyAM sudhI ?! evuM A jagata che. nathI jotAM AvaDyuM tenuM A du:kha che. nahIM to duHkha hoya ja nahIM A jagatamAM. A to narI zaMkAnAM ja vAtAvaraNamAM jIvI rahyuM che AkhuM jagata, ke 'Ama thaI jaze ke tema thaI jaze.' kazuMya thavAnuM nathI. amatho bhaDakATa zuM karavA kare che ? sUI rahe ne, pAMsaro. vagara kAmano Ama pharAphara kare. che. teM tArI jAta upara zraddhA rAkhI che e khoTI che badhI, 'haMDreDa parasenTa! eTale jyAM lAkha rUpiyA ApyA hoya tyAM vakhate evuM lAge ke 'pATa' barAbara nathI, to ya paNa zaMkA utpanna nA thavA devI. 'zuM thaze have ?" enuM nAma zaMkA paDI pAchI. zuM thavAnuM che te ? A deheya jato rahevAno che ane rUpiyA paNa jatA rahevAnA che. badhuM ya jatuM rahevAnuM che ne ?! poka ja mUkavAnI che ne chevaTe ?! chevaTe Ane pULo ja mUkavAno ne ?! to vaLI pahelethI marIne zuM kAma che ?! jIva ne, nirAMte ! AvuM bane eTale huM te dahADe zuM karuM ? "aMbAlAlabhAI, jame karI

Page #76
AptavANI-9 101 12 AptavANI-9 niHzaMka thaI jAne !! paNa A loka to bIjI badhI zaMkAne mahIM saMghare. paNa maravAnI zaMkA UThavA ja nA de, UThe to ya ene khodIne kADhI nAkhe. eTale kazuMya thavAnuM nathI. paNa jo phaphaDATa, phaphaDATa, taraphaDATa, taraphaDATa ! jANe joDe laI javAno hoya ne, thoDuMka ?! A to Akho dahADo 'zuM thaze, zuM thaze' ema phaphaDyA kare. alyA, zuM thavAnuM che ? A duniyA koI dahADo ya paDI gaI nathI. A duniyA jyAre nIce paDI jAya ne, tyAre allA hala nIce paDI jAya (!) eTale duniyA kyAre koI dahADo paDe ja nahIM. ame pelI nepALanI jAtrAe basa laIne gayA hatA tyAre rastAmAM yu.pI.mAM rAtre bAra vAge eka zahera AvyuM hatuM. karyuM hatuM e gAma ?! praznakartA : barelI hatuM e. dAdAzrI : hA. te bolIvALA phojadAra badhA ane kahe ke, "basa UbhI rAkho." pUchayuM ke, 'zuM che ?" tyAre emaNe kahyuM ke, "atyAre AgaLa nahIM javAnuM. rAtre ahIM raho, AgaLa raste lUMTe che. pacAsa mAIlanA eriyAmAM A bAjuthI, pelI bAjuthI badhAMne roke che. tyAre meM kahyuM ke, 'bhale lUMTAya, amAre to javuM che. tyAre chevaTe e lokoe kahyuM ke, 'to joDe be polIsavALA letA jAo." tyAre meM kahyuM ke, "polIsavALA bhale besADo." eTale pachI be polIsavALA baMdUka laIne beThA, paNa kazuM thayuM nahIM. e yoga jAmavo e to mahA mahA muzkelI che ! ane e yoga jAmavAno haze to hajAro prayatno karazo to ya tamArA prayatno dhULadhANI thaI jaze !! eTale DaravuM nahIM, zaMkA karavI nahIM. jyAM sudhI zaMkA na jAya tyAM sudhI koI dahADo ya kAma thAya nahIM. niHzaMkatA Ave nahIM tyAM sudhI mANasa nirbhaya thaI zake nahIM. zaMkA tyAM bhaya hoya ja. e zaMkA koI nA kare ! samAdhAta jJAtI pAsethI ! ane dhaMdho besavAno hoya to enI ciMtA kare, enI zaMkA thayA kare ke "dhaMdho besI jaze to zuM thaze, dhaMdho besI jaze to zuM thaze ?" alyA, zaMkA nA karIza. A to kaheze ke 'pAchA tejIvALA loko to kAyama tejImAM ja rahevAnA ane maMdIvALA te kAyama maMdImAM ja rahevAnA. maMdIvALo tejImAM koI dahADo nA Ave ane tejIvALo maMdImAM koI dahADo nA Ave. juo ne 'kevI ajAyabI che !" paNa nA, 'pojhiTivanegeTiva' beu hoya ja, nahIM to IlekTrisiTI thAya ja nahIM. mokSe javAnuM jJAna maLyuM che eTale have mokSamAM javAnI badhI taiyArI rAkhajo. zaMkA-kuzaMkA thAya to AvIne amane kahI devuM ke, 'dAdAjI, mane AvI Ama zaMkAo thAya che.' huM tamAruM samAdhAna karI ApIza. bAkI, zaMkA e to bahu moTAmAM moTI vasamI vastu che. e bhUta jevI che, DAkaNa jevI che. zaMkA karatAM DAkaNa vaLagI hoya te sArI, te koka utArI Ape. paNa zaMkA vaLagelI jAya nahIM. to zaMkA TheTha sudhI rAkho ! ApaNuM to A AtmajJAna che ! kaMI jevI tevI vastu nathI. A to ajAyaba vastu tamane prApta thayelI che ! ane A je badhA bhAvo Ave che ne, mananA bhAvo, buddhinA bhAvo, te badhA bhAvo khAlI bhaya pamADanArA ja che. eka phero samajI javAnuM ke A loko khAlI bhaya pamADanArAM che ane buddhi jyAM sudhI vaparAya tyAM sudhI Dakho ja karyA kare. tamAre Dakho kare che ke ? praznakartA: ko'ka phero UbhI thaI jAya che, UMdhI UbhI thAya che. dAdAzrI : paNa e khoTI vastu che eTaluM to tame samajI gayA cho ne ? praznakartA : hA, eTaluM to samajAya che. A muMbaI zaheranA dareka mANasane pUchI Avo ke bhaI, tamane maravAnI zaMkA thAya che ke ? tyAre kahe, "nA thAya." kAraNa ke e Avaka ja kADhI nAkhI hoya, dhorI mULiyAM sAthe kADhI nAkhI hoya. e jANe ke A zaMkA karIe to hamaNAM ja marI jaIe. to evI bIjI zaMkA paNa karavA jevI nahIM. bIjI zaMkAo aMdara UThe ne, to ene khodIne kADhI nAkhane ! badhe

Page #77
AptavANI-9 103 dAdAzrI : e khoTI vastu che ane A cenacALA kare che te badhA khoTA che, te badhuM samajAI gayuM che ne ? e kharI vastu nhoya ema samajAI gayuM che ne ? hA, A badhuM samaje eTale A AtmA bAju khasavAno prayatna hoya ja. chatAM peluM bahu jora hoya to hAlI javAya. koI phero dhaMdhAmAM moTI khoTa gaI to paNa tame kalAkonA kalAko nathI besI rahetA ne ? e paryAya Ave te cha-cha kalAka besI nathI rahetA ne ? praznakartA : besI rahe ne ! kaMI ThekANuM nahIM. dAdAzrI : pachI baMdha to thAya kharuM ne ? praznakartA: pachI to baMdha thAya. dAdAzrI : have baMdha thAya, te ghaDIe pelI khoTa vasula thAya ne pelA paryAya pachI baMdha thAya, ke khoTa UbhI rahI hoya ne chatAM baMdha thaI jAya ? ApaNane pAMcaso rUpiyAnI khoTa gaI, tenA AdhAre A cAlyuM. te bAra kalAka cAlyuM ke be dahADA cAlyuM. paNa jyAre tyAre e baMdha thAya che. to e pAMcaso rUpiyA jame thayA pachI baMdha thAya che ke pelI khoTa evI ne evI ja UbhI rahe to ye A baMdha thaI jAya che ? praznakartA : e khoTa to evI ne evI ja rahe. dAdAzrI : to pachI ApaNe baMdha karavAno artha zuM ? ApaNe khoTa pUrI nA thAya tyAM sudhI cAlu rAkhavuM hatuM ne ? praznakartA: paNa e to enI meLe cAlu thaI jAya che ane enI meLe baMdha thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : e baMdha thaI jAya to pAchuM bolavAnuM ke 'hajI nikAla thayo nathI ne kema baMdha thaI gayo chuM ? pAchuM Ava' evuM kahIe !! evuM che, khoTanA prazno vicAravA mATe ApaNane vAMdho nathI. paNa khoTa nA jAya tyAM sudhI vicAryA karavuM, to kAmanuM. nahIM to bhamaraDAnI peTha khoTa pUrI thayA vagara ema ne ema baMdha thaI jatuM hoya to to eno 104 AptavANI-9 artha ja nahIM ne ! nahIM to pahelethI ja baMdha rAkhavuM sAruM. bAkI, loka to badhA paryAya bhUlI jAya che. AgaLa lakhato jAya che ne pAchaLa bhUlato jAya che. ame eka "sekanDe' ya bhUlatA nathI, AjathI cALIsa varasa upara thayuM hoya to ya. paNa loka to bhUlI jAya ne ! kudarata parANe bhUlADe tyAre bhUlavuM enA karatAM pahelethI bhUlI javuM sAruM. A to yAde ya karmanA udayo karAve che ne bhUlADeya e ja che. to pachI ene" ApaNe" jarAka khabho ThokIne kahevuM joIe, je "che" e che ne 'nathI' e nathI, A 'vyavasthita'mAM pheraphAra kazo thaI javAno nathI. eTale khoTanI ciMtA karavI to AkhI jiMdagI karavI, nahIM to karavI nahIM. khoTanI ciMtA karavI che to jyAM sudhI napho 'eDajasTa' thAya tyAM sudhI karavI. paNa pachI jo bhamaraDAnI peTha ApaNe ko'kane AdhIna rahIe ane ciMtA enI meLe baMdha thaI jAya te kaI jAtanuM ?! napho eDajasTa' thayA vagara ja enI meLe ja baMdha thaI jAya ane khoTa pUrI thayA vagara enI meLe baMdha thaI jAya to pachI ApaNe pahelethI ja baMdha nA karI daIe ? A to khoTa pUrI thayA vagara baMdha thaI jAya che ne ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : to ApaNe ene kahIe ke, "kema baMdha thaI gayuM ? to pachI tuM cAlyuM hatuM zuM karavA te ? ne cAlyuM to TheTha sudhI, khoTa pUrI thatAM sudhI cAlavA do.' nahIM to zaMkA tA rAkhavI ! ame "jJAna" thatAM pahelAM pahelethI eka vAta samajelA. amane eka jagyAe zaMkA AvI hatI ke, 'A mANasa AvuM karaze, dago-phaTako karaze." eTale pachI ame nakkI karyuM ke zaMkA karavI to AkhI jiMdagI sudhI karavI. nahIM to zaMkA karavI ja nahIM. zaMkA karavI to TheTha sudhI karavI. kAraNa ke ene bhagavAne jAgRti kahI. jo zaMkA karIne baMdha thaI javAnI hoya to karIza nahIM. ApaNe kAzIe javA nIkaLyA ne mathurAthI pAchA AvIe, enA karatAM nIkaLyA nA hota to sAruM. eTale amane e mANasa joDe zaMkA AvI ke A

Page #78
106 AptavANI-9 105 mANasa Avo che. te pachI, amane zaMkA paDyA pachI ame zaMkA rAkhatA ja nathI. nahIM to tyAra pachI enI joDe vyavahAra ja nahIM. pachI to nA chetarAIe. jo zaMkA rAkhavI hoya to AkhI jiMdagI vyavahAra ja nA karIe. ceto kharAM, paNa zaMkA nahIM ! praznakartA: jema moTara calAvIe ne, te vakhate amAre sAme jAgRti to cAlu ne cAlu ja rAkhavI paDe ne ? ema amAro jIvana vyavahAra calAvIe to amAre jAgRti to kAyamanI rAkhavI ja paDe ne, ke 'Ama karIza to A mANasa khAI jaze ?" evuM to ApaNe khyAlamAM rAkhavuM ja paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : e to rAkhavuM paDe. paNa zaMkA nahIM karavAnI. ane "A khAI jaze' evI jAgRti ya rAkhavAnI jarUra nathI. phakta ApaNe cetatA rahevuM joIe. e ene jAgRti kaho, paNa zaMkA nahIM karavAnI. 'Ama thaze to zuM thaze, vakhate Ama haze to zuM thaze ?' evI zaMkAo nahIM karavI. zaMkAo to bahu nukasAnakAraka ! zaMkA to utpanna thatAMnI sAthe ja du:kha Ape ! praznakartA: ghaNI vakhata evuM thAya ke koI kAmamAM evAM 'problemsa' AvyA hoya to sAmA mANasa upara ApaNane zaMkA Ave, ne tethI ApaNane duHkha rahyA kare. dAdAzrI : hA, e AdhAra vagaranI zaMkAo che. zaMkAmAM be vastu thAya. eka to, pratyakSa du:kha thAya. bIjuM, enA para zaMkA karI e badalano guno lAgu thayo, kalama cAraso ADatrIsa cAlu thaI gaI. praznakartA : paNa amAre koI paNa kAma karavAnuM hoya. ke A raste A pula banAvavAno hoya to enAM 'sephaTI phekTara' to gaNavAM paDe ne? nahIM gaNIe to pula paDI jaze. tyAM ajAgRti rAkhIne pula banAvI jAya, evuM to nA ja cAle ne ! dAdAzrI : e barobara che. 'seIphaTI phekaTara" badhAM karIe, paNa tyAra pachI goThavaNI karatI vakhate pharI zaMkA UbhI nA thavI joIe. zaMkA UbhI thaI ke du:kha UbhuM thaze. AptavANI-9 praznakartA : paNa koI paNa kAma karavA jatAM koI mANasa emAM khoTuM nA kare, e mATe eno vicAra to karavo paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, vicAra karavAnI badhI chUTa ja che ! zaMkA karavAnI chUTa nathI. vicAra jeTalAM hoya eTalAM kara, AkhI rAta vicAra karavA hoya to kara paNa zaMkA nA karIza. kAraNa ke eno 'enDa' ja nahIM Ave. zaMkA e "enDalesa' vastu che. vicArano 'enDa' Avaze. mana thAkI jAya ne ! kAraNa ke bahu vicAravAthI mane haMmezAM thAkI jAya. eTale pachI e enI meLe ja baMdha thaI jAya. ane zaMkA nA thAke. zaMkA to AmanI Ave, temanI Ave. mATe zaMkA tuM nA rAkhIza. A jagatamAM zaMkA jevuM koI duHkha ja nathI. zaMkA karavAthI to pahelAM potAnuM ja bagaDe che, pachI sAmAnuM bagaDe che. ame to pahelethI zodhakhoLa karelI ke zaMkAthI potAnuM ja bagaDe che. jANe badhuM, to ya zaMkA nahIM ! tethI ame koI dahADo koInI para zaMkA karI nathI. ame jhINavaTathI tapAsa karIe, paNa zaMkA nA rAkhIe. zaMkA rAkhe e mAra khAya. jANIe kharA, paNa zaMkA nA rAkhIe. jarAya zaMkA nahIM rAkhavAnI ! eka jarAya zaMkA koInI para mane AvI nathI. jANIe badhuM ya, jANyAnI bahAra amAre akSare ya nA hoya. A ATalAmAM che, A ATalA pANImAM che, koI ATalA pANImAM che, koI ATalA pANImAM che, badhuM jANIe. koIe nIcethI paga UMcA karyA che, koI moTuM bagADe che. mahIM paga UMcA karelA, te hau dekhAya mane. paNa zaMkA nA karIe ame. zaMkA zuM lAbha Ape ? praznakartA : geralAbha thAya. dAdAzrI : zuM geralAbha thAya ? praznakartA : potAne nukasAna thAyane ! dAdAzrI : nA, paNa sukha keTaluM Ape ? zaMkA peThI tyAMthI e bhUta

Page #79
AptavANI-9 103 ja vaLagyuM. 'A ja laI gayo ke ANe Ama karyuM.' e peThI zaMkA ! e bhUta vaLagyuM ApaNane. pelAnuM to je thavAnuM haze te thaze, paNa ApaNane bhUta vaLagyuM. A 'dAdA' evA cokkasa, jarAya koInI para zaMkA nA kare. pAchA jANe badhuM ya, paNa zaMkA nA kare. 'kahetAra' te 'karatAra' be judAM ! saMsAramAM koI paNa prakAranI zaMkA rAkhavI e guno che. zaMkA rAkhavAthI kAma thatuM nathI. A 'jJAna' prApta thayuM, te have niHzaMka mane kAma karye jAva ne ! potAnuM DahApaNa karavA gayA to bagaDaze ane sahaja mUkazo to kAma thaI jaze. ema ne ema kAma karazo, tenA karatAM sahaja mUkazo to sAruM kAma thaze. zaMkA saheja paNa rahe tyAM kaMI paNa kArya thatuM nathI. praznakartA : chatAM koI paNa kArya karavAmAM zaMkA-kuzaMkA thayA kare che, to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : e bhAMjagaDavALuM ja ne ! e jarA muzkelImAM mUke. praznakartA H to zuM karavuM paNa ? dAdAzrI : zuM karavAnuM ? 'ApaNe' 'caMdubhAI'ne kahevuM ke, 'zaMkAkuzaMkA karazo nahIM. je Ave te karavAnuM.' basa, eTaluM ja. 'e' zaMkAkuzaMkA kare to 'ApaNe' kahenAra chIe ne, joDe joDe. pahelAM to koI kahenAra ja nahotuM eTale gUMcAtA hatA. have to peluM kahenAra che ne ! tyAM zUravIratA hovI ghaTe ! nahIM to zaMkA paDe e kAma ja UbhuM karazo nahIM. jyAM ApaNane zaMkA paDe ne, te kAma nA karavuM. agara to e kAma ApaNe choDI devuM. zaMkA UbhI thAya evuM kArya karavuM nahIM. ahIMthI amadAvAda javA saMgha nIkaLyo, heMDavA mAMDyo. mahIM keTalAka kaheze, 'are, vakhate varasAda paDaze ne pAchuM pahoMcAze nahIM, enAM karatAM pAchA heMDo ne !' evI zaMkAvALA hoya to zuM karavuM paDe ? evA 108 AptavANI-9 be-traNa jaNa hoya to hAMkI melavA paDe pAchA. nahIM to e to AkhuM badhuM ToLuM bagaDe. eTale zaMkA hoya ne, tyAM sudhI kazo bhalIvAra nA Ave. enAthI koI kAma thaI nA zake. bahu prayatno kare, bahu puruSArtha kare, tyAre te vaLI jAya to vaLI jAya. vaLI jAya to sAruM. badhAM khuzI thAya ne ! zUravIratA hoya, te koIka dahADo pheMkI de to badhuM pheMkIne cAlato thaI jAya ane e dhAre evuM kAma karI zake. eTale zUravIrapaNuM rAkhavuM joIe ke 'mane kaMI thAya nahIM.' ApaNe jhera khAvuM hoya to khAIe ne nA khAvuM hoya to koNa khavaDAve ? ApaNane kahe, 'hamaNe gADI athaDAI paDaze to ?' evuM DrAIvara kahe to ApaNe kahIe, 'rahevA de, tAruM DrAIviMga baMdha kara. UtarI paDa. bahu thaI gayuM.' eTale evA mANasane aDavA ye nA devAya. zaMkAvALAnI joDe to UbhuM ja nA rahevuM. ApaNuM mana bagaDI jAya. zaMkA kema AvavI joIe ? cokhkhuM hovuM joIe. vicAra to game tevAM Ave to ya paNa ApaNe 'puruSa' chIe ne ? puruSa nA hoya to mANasa marI jAya. puruSa thayA pachI puruSArthamAM zaMkA hotI haze ? puruSa thayA pachI bhaya zo ? svapuruSArtha ne svaparAkrama UbhAM thayAM che. pachI bhaya zo ? praznakartA H zUravIratA rAkhavI paDe ke enI meLe rahe ? dAdAzrI : rAkhavI paDe. ApaNe 'gADInuM eksiDanTa thaze' evuM nA vicArIe to ya e thavAnuM hoya to choDe che kaMI ? ane vicAre tene ? tene ya thavAnuM. paNa vicAryA vagara bese che, e zUravIra kahevAya. ene vAge ya ochuM, bilakula ochuM vAge ne bacI jAya. gADImAM beThA pachI evI zaMkA paDe che 'parama dahADe Trena athaDAI hatI, to Aje athaDAze to zuM thAya ?' evI zaMkA kema nathI AvatI ? eTale je kAma karavuM emAM zaMkA rAkhavI nahIM ne tamane zaMkA Ave to e kAma karavuM nahIM. 'AIdhara dhIsa ora dheTa !' AvuM te hotuM haze ? evI vAto karatA hoya tene ya UThADIne kahevuM ke, 'ghera jA. ahIM nahIM.' zUrAtananI vAta joIe.

Page #80
AptavANI-9 109 ApaNe ghera javuM che ne eka mANasa ema bolyA kare, ghera jatAM athaDAmaNa thAya to zuM thaze ? agara to eksiDanTa thaze to zuM thaze ?' to mana badhAnAM kevAM thaI jAya ?! evI vAtane to pesavA ja nA devAya. zaMkA hotI haze ? dariyA kinAre pharatA hoya ne kaheze, 'mahIM mojuM Ave ne kheMcI jAya to zuM thAya ?' koIe vAta karI hoya ke 'Ama mojuM AvI ane kheMcI gayuM.' to ApaNane zaMkA paDe to zuM thAya ? eTale A 'phUlizanesa'nI vAto che. 'phUlsa pereDAIjha' !! eTale je kAma karavuM emAM zaMkA nahIM, ne zaMkA Ave te karavuM nahIM. 'mArAthI A kAma thaze ke nahIM thAya' evI zaMkA paDe tyAMthI ja kAma thAya nahIM. zaMkA rahe che e buddhinuM tophAna che. ane evuM kazuM banatuM nathI. jene zaMkA paDe che ne, tene badhI bhAMjagaDa UbhI thAya che. karma rAjAno niyama evo che ke jene zaMkA paDe, tene tyAM e padhAre ! ane je gAMThe nahIM, tene tyAM to e UbhA ja nA rahe. mATe mana majabUta rAkhavuM joIe. A to 'prIkozata' ke Dakho ?! zaMkA to du:khe ya bahu Ape, bhayaMkara duHkha Ape. e zaMkA kyAre nIkaLe ?! ghaNAM pherA hajAra-be hajAranA dAgInA, ghiDayALa ne e badhuM lUMTI lIdhuM hoya koIe rastAmAM mArIne, to pachI kapaDAM-ghaDiyALa-ghareNAM pharI paherIne bahAra javAnuM hoya to te ghaDIe zaMkA UbhI thAya ke Aja bhego thaze to ? have nyAya zuM kahe che ? bhego thavAno emAM chUTako thavAno nathI ane tuM zuM karavA vagara kAmano zaMkA kare che ?! praznakartA : e zaMkA UbhI thaI, have tyAM enI mATe koI 'prIkozana' levA karavAnI kaMI jarUra rahetI nathI ? dAdAzrI : 'prIkozana' levAthI ja bagaDe che ne ! ajJAnIne mATe barobara che. jo A kinAre javuM hoya to A kinArAnuM badhuM ekajhekTa karo. 110 AptavANI-9 pele kinAre rahevuM hoya to pelA kinArAnuM ekajhekTa rAkho. jo zaMkA karavI hoya to pele kinAre raho. A to adhavacca rahIe eno artha ja nahIM ! praznakartA : paNa koI Denjara signala' Ave eTale emAM zaMkA na sevIe, paNa enA mATe sAhajika bhAve 'prIkozana' levA joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : 'prIkozana' tamArAthI levAya ja nahIM. 'prIkozana' levAnI zakti ja nathI. e zakti che nahIM, ene 'eDopTa' karavuM eno artha zo che ? praznakartA : amArAmAM 'prIkozana' levAnI zakti ja nathI ? dAdAzrI : bilakule ya zakti nathI. je zakti nA hoya, tene amathA mAnIe e kAmanuM ja nahIM ne ! A to 'prIkozana' levAnI zakti nathI ne karavAnI ye zakti nathI ane 'prIkozana' 'caMdubhAI' laI ja le che. tame vagara kAmanA Dakho karo cho. kare che koIka bIjo ane tame mAthe laI lo cho enuM tethI bagaDe che. praznakartA : eTale caMdubhAI 'prIkozana' le, eno vAMdho nathI ? dAdAzrI : e le ja. e to le ja, hamezAM ya le. vAto karato karato koI mANasa cAlato hoya, eTale e bedhyAnapaNe cAlato hoya paNa jo ekadama sApa jovAmAM Ave Ama jato, to ekadama kUdI jAya che e. e kaI zaktithI kUde che ? koNa kUdADatuM haze ? evuM bane ke nA bane ? ATalI badhI sAhajikatA ekalI che A dehamAM. A 'caMdubhAI'ne eTalI badhI sAhajikatA che ke Ama dekhatAMnI sAthe kUde. praznakartA : paNa evI sAhajikatA amArA kAmadhaMdhAmAM, vyavahAramAM nathI AvatI. dAdAzrI : e to Dakho karo cho tethI. ne zaMkA karavI to badhI jAtanI karavI joIe, ke 'bhAI, kAle marI javAya to zuM thaze ? koI nA marI jAya ?'

Page #81
11 1 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : marI jAya ne ! dAdAzrI : tyAra pachI ! eTale zaMkA karavI to badhI jAtanI karavI. A eka ja jAtanI kema karavI ? nahIM to zAnI zaMkA nA paDe evuM A jagata ?! kaI bAbatanI zaMkA rakhAya evuM nathI ?! ahIMthI ghera gayA to sAcA. kema e zaMkA nathI paDatI ? zaMkA hoya ja nahIM. eTale zaMkAne kahIe, 'calI jAva. huM niHzaMka AtmA chuM.' AtmAne zaMkA zuM vaLI ?! bImAMthI .. jaMgala ! huM zuM kahuM chuM ke zaMkA e bhUta che. pelI DAkaNa vaLagADavI hoya to vaLagADavI, ApaNane DAkaNa phAvatI hoya to vaLagADavI. paNa zaMkA paDe to ene zuM kahevuM ? ke 'dAdAno pholoara thayo ne have zAnI zaMkA rAkho cho ? tamane zarama nathI AvatI ? dAdA zaMkA koInA para rAkhatA nathI, ne tame zuM karavA zaMkA rAkho cho ? e baMdha karI do. dAdA ATalI uMmare zaMkA rAkhatA nathI, to tame to javAna cho' evuM kahIe eTale zaMkA baMdha thaI jAya. ame jiMdagImAM zaMkA nAma ja kADhI nAkhelI. zaMkA ja amane koInI para nathI AvatI. e 'sephasAIDa" kharI ke nahIM ? praznakartA : bahu moTI 'sephasAIDa.' dAdAzrI : zaMkA ja nAma nahIM. rUpiyA gajavAmAMthI kADhI lIdhelA dIThAM hoya to ya enI para zaMkA nahIM ane bIjA bhayaMkara gunA karyA hoya to ya zaMkA-baMkA rAma tArI mAyA ! jANIe kharA, jANavAmAM hoya. amArA jJAnamAM hoya ke "dhIsa Ijha dhIsa, dhIsa Ijha dheTa.' paNa zaMkA nahIM. zaMkA e bhayaMkara du:khadAyI che ane tenAthI navI jAtano saMsAra Ubho thAya evuM che. A bAvaLiyAnuM bIja hoya ne, to to bAvaLiyo ekalo ja Uge ane eka vaDanuM bIja hoya ne, temAM vaDa ekalo ja Uge. paNa zaMkA nAmanuM bIja evuM che ke A bIjathI to sattarA~ jAtanI vanaspati UbhI thaI jAya. eka ja bIjamAMthI sattaraze jAtanI vanaspati Uge, e bIjane rakhAya ja kema karIne ? A zaMkA nAmanuM bIja, e ame 112 AptavANI-9 ekalAe kADhI nAkheluM che. paNa tamane to sahejA saheje ya kaMIka koIka phero zaMkA AvI jAya, nahIM ? eTale amArA jevuM rAkhavuM. zaMkA kADhI nAkhavI. game te bAbata hoya ne, najare joyelI vAta hoya ne, to ya zaMkA nahIM. jANI rAkhavI, jANavuM kharuM. jANavAmAM pApa nathI ane AMkhe joyeluM ya khoTuM paDe che. keTalAMya dAkhalA evAM mAre banelA. A AMkhe jouM chatAM ya khoTuM nIkaLe. evA mAre dAkhalA "ekajhekTa' anubhavamAM AvelA. to bIjI vastu to kaI sAcI mAnavI ApaNe ? eTale dekhIe to ya zaMkA nA karavI. jANI rAkhavuM. A amArI zodhakhoLa bahu UMDI che. A to vAta nIkaLe tyAre potAnA anubhavamAM khabara paDe. ane jagatane kaMI A badhI zaMkA nIkaLI gayelI nathI. zaMkA nIkaLavI e to, 'jJAnI puruSa" ja pote potAnI zaMkA kADhI ane bIjAne paNa zaMkA badhI kADhI Ape. nahIM to bIjo koI kADhI Ape nahIM. mANasathI jAte zaMkA nA nIkaLe. e to moTAmAM moTuM bhUta che, e to DAkaNa kahevAya. tame Ama gayA hoya ne AmathI koIka mANasa AvatA hoya. e mANasa koIka benanA khabhe hAtha mUkIne cAlatA hoya ne tamArA jovAmAM Ave to zuM thAya tamane ? e hAtha zAthI mUkyo e to e jANe bicArAM. paNa tamane zuM thAya ? ane e zaMkA pesIne, eTale keTalAM bIja Uge pAchAM ! bAvaLiyo, lImaDo, AMbo, mahIM tophAna ! A zaMkA to DAkaNa karatAM ya bhUMDI vastu che. A DAkaNa to vaLagelI sArI ke bhUvo kADhI Ape. paNa A zaMkA koNa kADhe ? ame kADhI ApIe tamArI zaMkAo ! bAkI koI zaMkA kADhI Ape nahIM. praznakartA : pAchaluM yAda karIe to zaMkA Ave. dAdAzrI : e yAda ja karavuM nahIM. gaI gujarI bhUlI javAnI. gaI tithi to brAhmaNe ya vAMce nahIM. brAhmaNane kahIe, 'amArI choDI paMdara dahADA upara rAMDI hatI ke nahIM ?" to brAhmaNa kahe, 'evuM koI pUchatA haze kaMI ? e to je rAMDI e gaI.' praznakartA: paNa koIka vakhata zaMkA Ave.

Page #82
AptavANI-9 113 dAdAzrI : baLyuM Ave, paNa keTalAM badhAM jhADa UgI nIkaLe pachI ! bIja eka ane sattarA~ jAtanI vanaspati UgI nIkaLe ! praznakartA : AkhuM vana thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, AkhuM vana thaI jAya. bagIcAnuM jaMgala thaI jAya. A 'dAdA'e mahAparANe bagIcA banAvyA hoya, temAM pachI jaMgala thaI jAya. AvaDo moTo bagIco, pAcho jaMgala thaI jAya ? are, e gulAba ropatAM ropatAM to 'dAdA'no dama nIkaLI gayo. jo jo jaMgala nahIM karI nAkhatAM ! jaMgala nA thavA dezo. have nahIM thavA do ne ?! praznakartA : zaMkA to bilakula gamatI ja nathI, dAdA. paNa nikAla Ave nahIM eTale pachI 'penDIMga' rahyA kare. dAdAzrI : pAchI 'penDIMga' paDI rahe che ?! ukela nA lAvI nAkho ?! 'e skevara, bI skevara', Ama peluM 'elajibrA'mAM e cheda uDADI do ne, e rIte ? jene 'elajibrA' AvaDe ne, tene badhuM AvaDe. tamAre zaMkAothI badhI bhAMjagaDa UbhI thAya che, to pachI UMgha alana kare koI vakhata ? praznakartA : evuM nahIM, paNa nikAla nA thAya eTale pharI Ave. dAdAzrI : have zuM karazo ? zekI nAkho ne ! pachI Uge nahIM. je bIja zekIne rAkhI melyA, e pachI Uge kare nahIM. Uge tyAre bhAMjagaDa che ne ?! eTale tamAre ema kahevuM ke, 'dAdA'nAM 'pholoarsa' thaIne tamane zarama nathI AvatI ? nahIM to kahIe, 'be tamAcA mArI daIza. zaMkA zuM kare che ?" evuM vaDhavuM. bIjA vaDhe enAM karatAM 'ApaNe' vaDhIe e zuM khoTuM ? koNa vaDhe to sAruM ? ApaNI meLe ja vaDhIe te sAruM, lokonA vaLI godA khAvA tenAM karatAM ! praznakartA : A to mAra khAya to ya jAya nahIM. dAdAzrI : hA, mAra khAya to ya jAya nahIM. tethI A ja vAta 114 AptavANI-9 nIkaLI. zaMkA javAnI thAya tyAre vAta nIkaLe. nahIM to vAta nIkaLe nahIM. kAma badhuM paddhatisara karo, paNa zaMkA nA karazo. A 'relave' AgaLa saheja bhUla karIe, teDAM karIe, to zuM thAya ? praznakartA : kapAI jAya. dAdAzrI : tyAM keTalo DAhyo rahe che ?! zAthI DAhyA rahe che loka ? peluM tarata phaLa Ape che eTale. ane A zaMkAnuM phaLa moDuM maLe che. enuM phaLa zuM Avaze e Aja dekhAtuM nathI eTale AvAM teDAM kare che. zaMkAnuM teDuM, te kaMI jevI tevI vAta che ?! praznakartA : AgaLanuM pAchuM bIja paDe ne, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : are baLyuM, bIjanI kyAM vAta karo cho ?! AjanI zaMkAnuM teDuM to, AkhA jagatanI vastI UbhI thaI jAya ! zaMkA to TheTha "jJAnI puruSa' sudhI avaLuM dekhADe. A zaMkA, DAkaNa peThI eTale pachI zuM nA dekhADe ? praznakartA : badhuM ja dekhADe. dAdAzrI : 'dAdA'nuM avaLuM hau dekhAya. A 'dAdA'nI para to eka zaMkA karI hoya ne, to adhogatimAM jAya. ekeya zaMkA karavA jevo A 'dAdo' hoya ! 'varlDa'mAM Avo niHzaMka puruSa hoya nahIM. praznakartA : tame kaho cho ke zaMkA thaI jAya che, koI karatuM nathI. dAdAzrI : e vastu judI che. zAthI thAya che e vAta judI che. paNa A 'dAdA' upara zaMkA thAya nahIM. thaI jatI hoya to eno upAya karavo joIe. upAya Apelo che meM. ame e kahIe chIe ne, ke zaMkA to thaI jAya. paNa te upAya karavo joIe ke 'dAdAnI mAphI mAguM chuM. mAre zaMkA na thavI joIe, paNa thaI gaI." Avo upAya to hovo joIe ne ?' 'dAdA' to, A kALanA ajAyaba puruSa che, Azcarya puruSa che ! paNa ekaluM cokhkhuM ghI laIne Aja phare to vecAya kharuM ? kALa kevo vicitra che ! A cokhkhuM ghI laIne pharato hoya, tene dukAnanuM bhADuM

Page #83
AptavANI-9 115 mAthe paDe ! meluM hoya to jhapATAbaMdha nIkaLI jAya. A dharma sAco che. A to badhAnuM puNya pAkaze tema tema lAbha uThAvaze. paNa puNya pAkavAnAM che. puNya pAkyA vagara rahevAnAM nathI. jagata baphAI rahyuM che A to. jo baphAya che, jo baphAya che ! ane zaMkA UbhI thAya to baphAro keTalo thAya ? praznakartA : bahu thAya. dAdAzrI : baphAro bahu thAya ke keDe ? praznakartA : De hauM ! dAdAzrI : jo jo AvuM zaMkA kaMI karatA nahIM. zaMkA koInI karazo nahIM. zaMkA karavA jevuM nathI A jagata. mahIM lAMbuM dekhAya tyAre zaMkA UbhI thAya ne ! nahIM to A je zaMkA, eka phero pese ne, te zaMkA nIkaLI jAya tyAre kAmanuM ! have e ema ne ema nIkaLe nahIM. AmanuM gajuM ja nahIM ke zI rIte zaMkA kADhavI ?! "jJAnI puruSa' badhuM kADhI Ape, bIjAnuM gajuM nahIM. jADuM khAtuM hoya ne, eTale cAle. zaMkA kone UbhI thAya ? bahu jhINuM khAtuM hoya ne, ene zaMkA vadhAre thAya. mane to haiDatAM-cAlatAM zaMkA UbhI thatI hatI, jJAna nahotuM thayuM tyAM sudhI. eTale jAgRti nA hoya eTale upAdhi nahIM ne jAgratane to upAdhi bahu ne ! jAgRti hitakArI thaI paDe che ke vAMkI thaI paDe che ? praznakartA : bahu hitakArI thAya. paNa zaMkA karAve to ene kADhI ja nAkhavAnI. dAdAzrI : jAgRti kADhI nAkhavAnI ? jAgRti kADhI nAkhavI che ke pelI zaMkA kADhI nAkhavI che ? praznakartA : zaMkA ja kADhI nAkhavI che. dAdAzrI : hA, jAgRti to rahevA devI che ne ?! ame to zaMkAnA mULiyAM badhAM kADhI nAkhelAM. tame jaDamULathI khodI kADhI che ke rahevA dIdhI 116 AptavANI-9 che thoDI thoDI ? praznakartA : zaMkAnuM mahIM zodhakhoLa bahu cAlyA karatuM hatuM. dAdAzrI : paNa ene jaDamULathI kADhI nAkhI nathI haju ? praznakartA : Aje nimitta maLyuM dAdA taraphathI. dAdAzrI : hA, evuM kaMI haze tyAre ja ne ! nahIM to vAta nIkaLe nahIM. ne ApaNe to, huM kaMI ochuM A amuka ja TAIme vAta kADhuM chuM? 'eviDansa' bhegA thAya tyAre ja nIkaLe ne ! Ano kaI pAra AvavAno che, emano kaMIka pAra AvavAno haze, tamAro kaMI thoDo ghaNo pAra AvavAno haze, tyAre ja nIkaLe ne ! nahIM to zaMkA Ave to AkhI rAta UMgha nA Ave. praznakartA : mahIM kaiDa keDa thayA kare. ATalo badho mAra khAya to ya pAchuM jatuM nathI. dAdAzrI : napho zuM kADhyo ? praznakartA : kazo nahIM. dAdAzrI : chatAMya paNa rahe che ? A zAthI A vAta nIkaLI ? mane khabara nahIM ke ATaluM badhuM haze ! A "jJAna" ApeluM eTale tame AvuM tevuM nAnI bAbata to kADhI nAkho, ne tamArI meLe ja kADhI nAkho. ne kheMcanArI vastu je khUMce, ApaNane Ama kAMkaro khuMce to khabara nA paDe, ApaNane 'jJAna' thayelAM ne ? kheMce eTale kADhI nAkhe ne ke nA kADhI nAkhe ? e rahevA de kharo ? praznakartA : nA. kADhI nAkhe. dAdAzrI : have nahIM rahe ne ? zaMkAzIla mata juduM, 'ApaNe' judAM ! praznakartA have zaMkAnI 'iphekTa' tarata to thAya ja che. paNa evI

Page #84
AptavANI-9 117 'iphekTa' AvatA bhavamAM paNa thavAnI che ? dAdAzrI : jenuM bIja paDe ne, tenAM phaLa Ave. mATe bIjamAMthI ja kADhI nAkhavAnuM. zaMkAnuM bIja UgyuM hoya ne, eTale ApaNane khabara paDI jAya ke A kapAsano choDavo nahIM paNa bIjo choDavo che. eTale ene kADhIne UkheDIne pheMkI devuM ke jethI pharI enuM bIja ja nA Ave ne ! kUMDuM Ave tyAre pharI pAchuM bIja paDe ne ?! praznakartA : pachI bIjA bhavamAM naDe nahIM ? dAdAzrI : bIja nA paDe to bIjA bhavamAM kazuM ya asara nA thAya. A gayA avatAre bIja paDeluM, tethI A zaMkA utpanna thaI mATe have bIja ja utpanna nA thavA devuM. mATe A jagata zaMkA karavA jevuM nathI. nirAMte sUI javuM. praznakartA : niHzaMka draSTi thAya to ja nirdoSa dekhAya. dAdAzrI : mane tethI to nirdoSa dekhAya che. have tame zuddhAtmA thayA pachI mana badalAya nahIM, e 'DiscArja rUpe che. mana zaMkAzIla thayuM hoya to zaMkAzIla ane avaLuM kahe to avaLuM, emAM gabharAvAnuM koI kAraNa nathI. "ApaNe" joyA karavuM. e kaheze, "ApaNe marI jaIzuM' to ya zuM ? 'je thAya e thaze emAM ya amane vAMdho nathI,' kahIe. pratikramaNathI pyaoNriTI'! praznakartA : paNa koI vakhate prakRtimAM ja pelI zaMkAnI gUMca paDI gaI hoya ne, e kevI rIte chedAya ? dAdAzrI : 'dAdA' zuM kahe che ke zaMkA rAkhazo ja nahIM. zaMkA Ave to kahIe, 'jA, dAdAne tyAM !" evo udaya Ave to paNa e udaya ane ApaNe be judAM ja chIe. praznakartA : sAmA para zaMkA karavI nathI chatAM zaMkA Ave, to te zI rIte dUra karavI ? 118 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : tyAM pachI enA zuddhAtmAne saMbhArIne kSamA mAgavI, enuM pratikramaNa karavuM. A to pahelAM bhUlo karelI, tethI zaMkA Ave che. praznakartA : ApaNA karmanAM udayane lIdhe je bhogavavuM paDe, e pratikramaNa karyA karIe to ochuM thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : ochuM thAya. ane "ApaNane bhogavavuM nathI paDatuM. 'ApaNe' 'caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'pratikramaNa karo.' eTale ochuM thAya. jeTaluM jeTaluM pratikramaNa karIe eTaluM e ochuM thAya ne ! pachI rAge paDI jaze. A to karmanA udayathI badhAM bhegAM thayelAM che. Ane ajJAnI kaMI pheravI zakavAno nathI ne jJAnI ya pheravI zakavAnAM nathI. to ApaNe zA mATe be khoTa khAvI ? praznakartA : peluM barAbara kahyuM dAdA, ke A jagata pahelethI AvuM ja che. dAdAzrI : AmAM bIjuM che ja nahIM. A to DhAMkyuM che eTale lAge che evuM ane zaMkA ja mAre che. eTale zaMkA Ave to AvavA nA devI ne pratikramaNa karavAM. koI paNa mANasa mATe kazI zaMkA Ave to pratikramaNa karavAM. tyAM "cArja thAya ! praznakartA: A jJAna" lIdhA pachI Ape vyavahArane nikAlI kahyo che e vAta barAbara che. paNa emAM koIka kyAMka anupacArika vyavahAra hoya che. to tyAM AgaLa 'cArjiMga'nuM bhayasthAna kyAM ? dAdAzrI : 'cArja' thaI jAya evAM bhayasthAno hotAM ja nathI. paNa zaMkA paDe tyAM AgaLa "cArja thaI jaze. zaMkA paDe eTale e bhayasthAna 'cArjiMga'vALuM mAnavuM. zaMkA eTale, kevI zaMkA ? ke UMgha nA Ave evI zaMkA. nAnI amathI zaMkA paDI ane baMdha thaI jAya evI nahIM. kAraNa ke je zaMkA paDI, e pachI bhUlI jaIe e zaMkAnI kiMmata ja nathI. praznakartA to pachI bindAsa rahevAnuM? nIDara ne bephAma rahevAnuM?

Page #85
120 AptavANI-9 pudgala bhAvo che. paNa te ajJAnIne athaDAmaNa thaI jAya, kAraNa ke e hAthI thayo nathI ne ! ajJAnI mANasa tarata bhaLI jAya, vAra ja nahIM. AptavANI-9 119 dAdAzrI : nA. bephAma rahe to mAra paDaze. bephAma thAya ne nirphikaro thAya to mAra paDI jAya. A devatAmAM kema hAtha nathI ghAlatA? praznakartA: to pachI tyAM aupacArika 'ekazana' kayuM levuM joIe? dAdAzrI : bIjuM zuM 'ekazanamAM lezo ? tyAM pastAvo ne pratikramaNa ekaluM ja "ekazana' che. praznakartA : eTale ApaNA A "jJAna" pachIno puruSArtha kayo ? pastAvo karavAno ke bhAvamana upara choDI devAnuM? dAdAzrI : bhAvamana to A 'jJAna' pachI rahetuM ja nathI. paNa jene A 'jJAna' kAcuM rahyuM hoya, tene bhAvamana hoya vakhate mahIM jarAka. bAkI, bhAvamana hotuM nathI. "jJAna" kacAzavALuM pariNAma pAmyuM hoya, A "jJAna" pUrepUruM sAMbhaLyuM nA hoya ke A 'jJAna pUrepUruM bolyo nA hoya, to tene mahIM kAcuM paDI jAya. te A to keTalIka vakhata navuM 'enjina' ya cAlu nA thAya, evuM bane ne ? eTale pastAvo ekalo ja karavAno ane pastAvo te ya ApaNe nahIM karavAno. ApaNe ApaNI jAta pAse pastAvo karAvavAno ke, 'tame pastAvo karo. tame Ama cho, tema cho.' evuM 'tamAre 'caMdubhAIne kahevAnuM. evuM 'tame' game eTaluM vaDho to koI phariyAda kare 'tamArI' para ? pudgalabhAvate gAMThavA nahIM ! eTale zaMkA paDe to badhuM coMTI paDe. mahIM je besI rahyAM che e badhAMya coMTI paDe. e cetanabhAva nhoya, jaDabhAvo cetanane zuM karI zake ? - have puruSa thayA pachI ADAavaLA vicAro nA Ave, ne Ave to ene sAMbhaLavAnA nahIM. e badhA pudgalabhAvo che. eTale e Ave to ene ApaNe gAMThIe nahIM. pachI koI nAma ja nA de ne ! kUtarAM bhase eTaluM ja. hAthInI pAchaLa kutarAM bhase ne, te hAthI pAchaLa jue nahIM. e samajI jAya ke kUtarAM che. kutarAM so-baso hoya ne koI hAthInI pAchaLa bhasatA hoya to e jue pAchaLa ke koNa koNa bhase che ? evuM, pelAM 'koI kazuM ja karanAra nathI', enuM nAma zUravIratA kahevAya. e pudgala ane ApaNe cetana, AtmA, anaMtazaktivALA ! praznakartA : e vicAra ne e badhuM Avaze tyAre dekha leMge. dAdAzrI : Ave ja zI rIte paNa ? dekha levAnuM ya nA rahe ane Ave to ApaNe zuM levAdevA ? e judI vAta che, ApaNI judI nAta. nAta judI, jAta judI ! eTale kazuM thatuM nathI. A to kazuM thaI gayeluM joyuM ya nathI. A to khAlI zaMkAo che ane zaMkA paDe che te ya pudgalabhAva che. kazuM thAya nahIM, ne ApaNo 'vesTa opha TAIma enDa enarjI' che khAlI. hA, e jo kadI cetanabhAva hota to harAvI pADe. paNa evuM to nathI. pachI zuM ?! e jaDa vastuo che, te cetanane zuM karI zake ? e jo cetana hoya to vAta judI che. mana-vacana-kAyAnA tamAma lepAyamAna bhAvo e jaDabAvo kahyuM ane pote nirlepa ja che. pachI zuM lepAyamAna karavAnA ? pelA jaDabhAvo ne prAkRtabhAvo che evuM ApaNe bolIe chIe ne? praznakartA : bolIe chIe ne ! dAdAzrI : to pachI e prazna ja Ubho nA thAya ne, ke 'AvuM zuM haze ne zuM nahIM !" mana-vacana-kAyAnA tamAma lepAyamAna bhAvo e jaDabhAvo, prAkRtabhAvo, che, cetana bhAva nathI. e jAti judI, veSa judA. ene ane ApaNe zuM levAdevA ? zaMkA' sAme jJAtajAgRti ! praznakartA : have zaMkA AvI te vakhate zuM karavAnuM rahe che amAre A "jJAna" pachI ? dAdAzrI : tamAre joyA karavAnuM, zaMkA Ave che te. praznakartA : zaMkAne Ama amAre koI pratibhAva pheMkavAno nathI ?

Page #86
AptavANI-9 121 dAdAzrI : kazuM nahIM, enI meLe ja "eDajasTamenTa' leze. tamAre joyA karavAnuM ke "oho, caMdubhAIne zaMkA AvI che ! ane zaMkA Ave eTale e saMtApamAM hoya ja. bhayaMkara du:khI hoya, pAra vagaranAM du:kha hoya ene. kAraNa ke bhagavAne kahyuM ke zaMkA e ja moTAmAM moTo guno che ane te ene tarata ja du:kha Ape che. e zaMkA sAmAne duHkha ApatAM Apaze, Apaze tyAranI vAta tyAre. paNa potAne bhayaMkara duHkha Ape che ane pratibhAva karavAthI to zaMkAnuM du:kha vadhe che. praznakartA : eTale zaMkA vakhate amAre jAgRti rAkhIne chUTA rahevAnuM? dAdAzrI : e vakhate to chUTA rahevAnuM, paNa kAyamane mATe chUTA rahevAnuM. eka dahADo rAkhI juo, aThavADiyAmAM eka dahADo rAkhI juo. tamane samaja paDaze ke bIje dahADe evuM rAkhIe to vAMdho nahIM Ave. paDI nahIM javAya. praznakartA : paDavA karatAM gUMcavADo thaI jAya che, eno vAMdho Ave 122 AptavANI-9 kevI rIte pote ukela lAve ? dAdAzrI : e saMzaya rAkhe che evuM ApaNe jJAna ja bhUlI javAnuM. e je jJAna che ApaNane, e jJAna ja bhUlI javAnuM. sAmo saMzaya rAkhe che ke nathI rAkhato. e zuM tamane khabara paDe ? praznakartA : mane AvI AvI zaMkA che, evuM moDhe kahe to ? dAdAzrI : moDhe kahe, to kahIe, 'zaMkA tamane che, duHkhI tame thazo. zaMkA rAkhazo to duHkhI thazo.' evuM kahI cukIe. pachI je thAya, tene ApaNe zuM karIe ?! ane tamArAM evAM AcaraNa nahIM hoya to tamane koI zaMkA karaze ya nahIM. jagatano niyama ja che evo ! ko'ka dahADo evAM AcaraNa karelAM che, tethI A zaMkA UbhI rahI che. kAraNa ke guno thayo hato paccIsa varSano hato tyAre ane sATha varSano thAya tyAre korTamAM kesa cAlyo ! A AvuM badhuM hoya che badhuM. mATe koI zaMkA kare che te ApaNo ja guno che. praznakartA : ene ApaNA para saMzaya Avyo hoya to ApaNe pUchavuM paDe ke kema saMzaya Avyo ? dAdAzrI : pUchavAmAM majhA ja nahIM. e puchavuM nahIM, ApaNe tarata ja samajI javuM ke ApaNo kaMIka doSa che. nahIM to zaMkA kema AvI ? keTalAMka mANaso cora nathI hotA, chatAM enA para corInI zaMkA Ave che. to e cora pahelAM hovo joIe. nahIM to ema ne ema zaMkA nA paDe. praznakartA : sAmAM mANasanI draSTi evI hoya to zuM karIe ApaNe ? dAdAzrI : nA, sAmAnI draSTi evI nathI hotI. e ApaNI ja bhUlanuM pariNAma che. eTaluM jagata gerakAyadesara nathI ke tamArAmAM bhUla nA hoya to sAmAne draSTi AvI utpanna thAya. jagata bilakula kAyadesara, eka sekaMDe sekaMDa kAyadesara che ! bhogave enI bhUla" e vAkya lagADI dIdhuM ke ukela AvI gayo. dAdAzrI : e gUMcavADo to pahelAMnI prekTisa che ne, te jatI nathI. chUTatI nathI e. bAkI, have zaMkAnI jarUra ja nathI. praznakartA : ame chUTA paDIe eTale e zaMkA tUTI paDe che ? dAdAzrI : hA, zaMkA enI meLe vIkharAI jAya che. praznakartA : eTale jAgRti ja vadhAre rAkhavAnI rahe che have. dAdAzrI : jonAra haMmezAM jAgRta ja hoya. jo jonAra che to jAgrata hoya. jJAtA-draSTA, e jAgrata hoya to ja jJAtA-draSTA kahevAya. bAkI, ajAgRti eTalo mAra paDe. sAmAtA saMzayatI sAme ! praznakartA : have sAmo koI ApaNA upara saMzaya rAkhe to eno

Page #87
AptavANI-9 123 zaMkA karanAra che te bhogave che ke zaMkA jenI para thAya che te bhogave che, e joI levuM. praznakartA : mArI samajaNa pramANe to A pAMca AjJA 'dAdA'e je ApI che, enuM pAlana barobara nahIM thavAne kAraNe A prazno ne zaMkA badhuM upasthita thAya che. dAdAzrI : hA, nahIM to UbhuM ja nA thAya. AjJA pALe to kazuM hotuM ja nathI. AjJApAlanamAM jarA kacAza Ave eTale peluM thaI jAya. AjJA pALe che ne te to, evAM ApaNe tyAM to lagabhaga hajAro mANaso samAdhimAM rahe che. zaMkA karavAtI tyAM jaga tiHzaMka (?)! ane zaMkA karavAnI eka ja jagyA che ke huM kharekhara 'caMdubhAI' chuM ? eTalI ja zaMkA kara kara karyA karavAnI che. te ApaghAta nathI. praznakartA : 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e vAta upara ja zaMkA paDe..... dAdAzrI : to to kAma ja thaI jAya ! e zaMkA to koIne paDatI ja nathI ne ! huM pUcha pUcha karuM chuM to ye zaMkA nathI paDatI. 'huM caMdu ja chuM, huM caMdu ja chuM' kaheze. e zaMkA paDatI ja nathI, nahIM ?! pachI huM halAva, halAva karuM tyAre vaLI zaMkA paDe, ne pachI vicAra kare ke A dAdA kahe che e ya kharuM che, vAtamAM kaMI tathya che.' bAkI, enI meLe, potAnI meLe zaMkA koIne ya nA paDe. praznakartA : e zaMkA paDe to AgaLa jAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. e zaMkA ene mATe ja zabda che. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e zaMkA 'helpa' kare che. bIjI badhI zaMkA to ApaghAta karAvaDAve. 'huM kharekhara caMdubhAI hoIza ? ane A badhAM kahe che ke Amano chokaro chuM, e kharekhara hoIza ?' e zaMkA paDI to kAmanuM !! eTale zaMkA rAkhavA jevI kaI che ? AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA rAkhavAnI 124 AptavANI-9 che ke 'AtmA A haze ke te haze !' kharo AtmA jyAM sudhI jaNAya nahIM, tyAM sudhI AkhA jagatane zaMkA hoya ja. 'caMdubhAI te huM nizcayathI chuM, kharekhara ja A caMdubhAI huM ja chuM' evuM mAne che tethI Aropa badhA ghaDAyA. paNa have enI para zaMkA paDI gaIne ? vahema pesI gayo ne ? kharo vahema pesI gayo ! e vahema to kAma kADhI nAkhe. evo vahema to koIne pesato ja nathIne ! ApaNe vahema pADIe to ya nA paDe ne ! e zaMkA paDe ja zI rIte ? are, sarakAra hau 'elAva' kare ! sarakAra 'elAva' nathI karatA ? 'caMdulAla hAjara hai ?" kahetAMnI sAthe caMdulAla jAya to sa2kA2 'elAva' karI de ! paNa potAne zaMkA paDe nahIM koI dahADo ya, ke huM caMdulAla nathI ne huM A bIjI rIte kyAM jhAlI paDyo chuM, evuM. potAnI jAta para zaMkA paDe evuM bahAra che nahIM ne ? dastAvejamAM ya lakhe ke vakIlasAhebe sahI karI, ke tarata 'eksepTa'! ATalA badhA loka kabUla kare che, pachI ene zaMkA ja zI rIte paDe ?! jUThA jJAta para vahema (!) eTale potAnA jJAnanI upara je vahema pADI Ape, enuM nAma 'jJAnI'! potAnuM jJAna to koI dahADo jUThuM hoI ja nA zake ne ? paNa 'jJAnI' e badhuM karI zake, to potAne vahema paDI jAya. e 'roMga bilipha' nIkaLI gaI eTale kAma thaI gayuM ! eka jaNa to mane evuM kahevA mAMDyA, dAdA, mane koI dahADo mArI jAta upara zaMkA nathI paDI, Aja mane zaMkA paDI gaI.' meM kahyuM, 'huM caMdubhAI chuM, e tamArA jJAna upara kharekhara vahema paDyo ne ?" vahema eTale 'kreka' paDI gaI badhI. eTale 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e jJAna upareya 'kreka' paDavI joIe ne ? zaMkA paDavI joIe ne ! ane sAcA jJAnamAM niHzaMka rahevAnuM che. A to jUThA jJAnamAM niHzaMka rahyA, zaMkA rahita rahyA !

Page #88
AptavANI-9 125 eTale atyAra sudhI jANelA jJAna upara vahema paDe ne, tyArathI ja ame jANIe ke e jJAna tUTI javAnuM thayuM. jemAM vahema paDyo, zaMkA paDI ne, e jJAna UDavAnuM thayuM. eTale sAmI zaMkA paDe evuM jJAna hovuM joIe ne ? ane sAcA jJAna upara kyAreya zaMkA paDe nahIM. vakhate AvaraNane lIdhe samajaNa nA paDe, to e vAta judI che. bAkI, sAcA jJAna upara zaMkA nA paDe. kAraNa ke ahIM zarIramAM AtmA che ne ! vahema "ahaMkAra' para ja ! koI dahADo A ahaMkAra upara vahema nathI paDyo. badhI vastu upara vahema paDyo che paNa ahaMkAra upara vahema nathI paDyo. "A caMdubhAI, te huM chuM' enI upara vahema paDyo eTale ahaMkAra upara vahema paDyo kahevAya. ane 'caMdubhAI" para vahema paDyo, e kADhI nAkhavAno nathI ApaNe. ene 'DrAmeTika' rAkhavAno che. koI bhartuharino khela karato hoya, te Ama badho pATha bhajave. bUmo pADe, vairAga lAve, AMkhamAM pANI lAve, raDe, abhinaya kare. loko jANe ke ene bahu duHkha che ane ApaNe ene pUchavA jaIe ke, 'kema tamane bahu duHkha hatuM ?" tyAre e kahe, "nA, huM to lakSmIcaMda chuM. A to mAre bhartuharino pATha bhajavavAno Avyo." evuM A tamAre 'caMdubhAI'no pATha bhajavavo paDaze. ane 'pote koNa che e jANI gayA, eTale kAma thaI gayuM ! bhavobhavathI niHzaMkatA ! bAkI 'pote koNa che" enA para ja jo koIne zaMkA paDatI nathI ne ! mahAna mahAna AcAryone-sAdhuone paNa pote je nAma che, tenI para zaMkA paDI nathI koI dahADo ! jo zaMkA paDe to ya ApaNe jANIe ke samyak darzana thavAnI taiyArIo thaI rahI che. e zaMkA ja paDatI nathI na, pahelI ! UlaTAM ene ja sajjaDa kare che ane A badhuM krodha-mAnamAyA-lobha tene lIdhe che. A asatyanI pakaDa pakaDI che, te satyarUpe enuM bhAna thayuM che ke A satya ja che. asatyanI bahu vakhata pakaDa pakaDavAmAM Ave, tyAra pachI e ene mATe satya thaI jAya. gADharUpe asatya karavAmAM 126 AptavANI-9 Ave to pachI satya thaI jAya. pachI ene asatya che evuM bhAna ja nA thAya, satya ja che evuM rahe. eTale ahIM jo zaMkA paDe to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha badhuM jatuM rahe. paNa A zaMkA paDe nahIM ne ! kevI rIte paDe ?! koNa pADI Ape A ? bhavobhavathI niHzaMka thayelo e bAbatamAM potAne zaMkA paDe evuM koNa karI Ape ? je bhavamAM gayo tyAM AgaLa je nAma paDyuM, tyAM ene ja satya mAnyuM. zaMkA ja paDatI nathI ne ! keTalI badhI muzkelI che ?! ane tene laIne A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha UbhAM rahyAM che ne ! tame jo 'zuddhAtmA' cho to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhanI jarUra nathI. ane tame jo "caMdubhAI cho to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhanI jarUra che. AkhA zAstronuM 'solyuzana' ahIM AgaLa A ekaluM ja jANavAmAM thaI jAya ! paNa te AtmajJAna jANavuM kevI rIte ? ane AtmajJAna jANyA pachI kazuM jANavAnuM bAkI nathI rahetuM. paNa e jANe zI rIte ?! AbhA saMbaMdhI niHzaMkatA ?! have bhagavAne AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA koIne jAya nahIM, ema kahyuM. kRSNa bhagavAnane e zaMkA gaI hatI. bAkI, AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA-ke 'AtmA Avo haze ke tevo haze, phalANo haze ke tevo haze, Ama haze ke tema haze ? thoDuM ghaNuM to e kartA haze ne ? amuka bAbatamAM e kartA haze ja ne ?" evI zaMkA pAchI rahyA kare. nahIM to kaheze, 'karyA vagara to kema cAle A gADuM ?" alyA, tane nA khabara paDe. e to 'jJAnI puruSa ja jANe ke A zI rIte cAlI rahyuM che ! have e AtmA 'jJAnI'e jAmyo tevo hoya, A pustakamAM lakhelo tevo nA hoya. pustakamAM AtmA saMbaMdhI vAta ja nathI koI. eTale AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkArahita koI thayelo ja nahIM. A to kaheze, 'ATalI bhAvanA to AtmAnI hovI ja joIe ne !' have e jene AtmA mAnI rahyA che, tene huM nizcetana cetana kahuM chuM. have tyAM AgaLa AtmA zI rIte prApta thAya ? zaMkA ja rahe ne, pachI ! jagata badhuM AtmAnI zaMkAmAM ja paDeluM che. loka mane pUche che ke,

Page #89
AptavANI-9 127 'A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha to AtmA vagara koI kare ja nahIM ne ?' meM kahyuM, 'nirAMta thaI gaI tyAre. (!)' tyAre kahe che, 'paNa jaDa to kare ja nahIM ne ?" meM kahyuM, 'A jaDa kare nahIM. paNa cetane ya zI rIte kare ? je jenAmAM guNadharma nathI, e zI rIte kare ?" evuM che ne, A vyatireka guNo che, enI ene khabara nA hoya ne ! ke be vastu sAthe hoya to tIsaro vyatireka guNa utpanna thAya, potAnA guNadharma choDe nahIM ane navo guNa utpanna thAya. paNa e 'jJAnI' sivAya samajAya zI rIte ?! Ama manuSyapaNuM tA gumAvAya ! have 'AtmA Avo haze ke tevo haze, Ama haze ke tema haze' e vicAraNAmAM koIka Avyo hoya, tene bhagavAne samyaktva mohanIya kahyuM. AvI vicAraNAmAM ja haju AvyA nathI. A mohanIya paNa jAgI nathI. A to atyAre mithyAtva mohanIya, mizra mohanIya ja che haju. samyaktva mohanIya jAgI hota to bhagavAna ene mahAna adhipati kaheta. A to eka 'ploTa' hoya ke eka makAna hoya ne ATaluM adhipati hoya, emAM to potAnI jAtane zuM ya dhanya mAnIne peTa upara hAtha pherave ne 'hoIyAM' karIne sUI jAya che ! alyA, zuM joIne sUI jAya che ?! anaMta avatAro AvAM 'hoIyAM' karIne sUI gayo ! zarama nathI AvatI ?! pAcho hAtha peTa upara pheravIne 'hoIyAM' kaheze. alyA, zuM joIne UMghI jAya che ?! UMdhavA jevuM A jagata che ? manuSyapaNuM maLyuM, ne UMdhAtuM haze ?! manuSyapaNuM maLyuM, sAro joga maLyo, UMcA dharmapustako vAMcavAno yoga maLyo, UMcI ArAdhanA maLI, vItarAganAM darzana thayAM, ne tuM 'hoIyAM' karIne sUI jAya che ?! ne pAchI 'beDarUmo' karI che ?! alyA, 'beDarUma' nA karAya. e to eka rUma hoya te badhAM bhegAM sUI rahevAnuM ne pelI to saMsArI jaMjALa ! A to 'beDarUma' karIne AkhI rAta saMsAranI jaMjALamAM paDyo hoya. AtmAnI vAta to kyAMthI yAda Ave ? 'beDarUma'mAM AtmAnI vAta yAda AvatI haze ?! meM eka jaNane pUchyuM, 'zuM joIne sUI jAva cho ?' tyAre e kahe 128 AptavANI-9 che, 'sADA daza vAgyA, te have nA UMghI jauM ?" 'alyA, A kaMI kamAyA vagara sUI gayA ? Aja zuM kamAyA e kaho mane.' tyAre e kahe, 'huM to kaMIka karuM chuM. pelAM kazuM nathI karatAM !' pelAne pUchyuM, tyAre e ya evuM kahe ke, "e nathI karatAM, A nathI karato.' badhAM AvuM bole che ! praznakartA : hA, evo hisAba gaNe che, potAnA hisAba gaNavAne badale. dAdAzrI : to badhuM pola mAryuM che ! eTale jagata AkhuM ya zaMkAmAM che, apavAda sivAya. kAraNa ke AtmA zuM che, emAM zaMkA nA jAya. saMdeha rahyA kare ke, 'AtmA Ama haze ke tema haze, Ama haze ke tema haze.' evo saMdeha rahyA ja kare. e saMdeha rahyA kare eTale pachI jagatamAM bIjI jAtajAtanI zaMkAo UbhI thAya. tyAre saMdeha jAya ! praznakartA : ne saMdeha gayA che evuM nathI kaheto, paNa saMdeha mane aMdarathI udbhavato nathI. dAdAzrI : hA, udbhave nahIM, e vAta judI che. evuM amuka kALa sudhI lAge. paNa jyAre muzkelI Ave tyAre saMdeha UbhA thAya pAchAM. A to badhuM pharavAnuM che. badhuM eka ja jAtanuM ochuM rahe che ? jema divasarAta badalAyA kare che, TAIma niraMtara badalAyA kare che, tevuM A avasthAo badhI niraMtara badalAyA karavAnI ! eTale saMdeha mANasano kyAre jAya ? vItarAgatA ane nirbhaya thaI gayA pachI saMdeha jAya. nahIM to saMdeha to jAya ja nahIM. zAMti hoya tyAM sudhI anukULa lAge. paNa upAdhi Ave tyAre azAMti UbhI thAya ne ! tyAre pAchuM badhuM aMdarathI gUMcAI jAya, ne tethI badhA saMdeha UbhA thAya. 'AtmA'tI zaMkA kone ? praznakartA : zrImad rAjacaMdrajIe AtmasiddhimAM lakhyuM che ke,

Page #90
130 AptavANI-9 129 'AtmAnI zaMkA kare, AtmA pote Apa. zaMkAno karanAra te, acaraja eha amApa." AmAM AtmAnI zaMkA AtmA kare che ke buddhi kare che ? dAdAzrI : e AtmAnI zaMkA AtmA kare che, A buddhi nathI karatI. AtmA, eTale je atyAre tamAro mAnelo AtmA che te ane mULa AtmA, e be judA AtmA che. tamAro mAnelo AtmA buddhi sahita che. ahaMkAra, buddhi, badhA sAthe thaIne mULa AtmAnI zaMkA kare che. zuM zaMkA kare che ? ke 'mULa AtmA nathI. e evuM kaMI lAgatuM nathI.' ene zaMkA Ave che ke Ama hoya ke kema ?! praznakartA : eTale buddhi uparAMta je AtmA che e enI sAthe saMkaLAyelo che. dAdAzrI : A jene ApaNe AtmA jene mAnIe chIe, agara to A jagata zene AtmA mAne che ? 'huM caMdubhAI ane buddhi mArI, ahaMkAra badhuM mAruM ane huM ja A AtmA chuM ane A AtmAne mAre zuddha karavAno che" evuM mAne che. emane ema khabara nathI ke AtmA to zuddha che ja ane A rUpaka UbhuM thayeluM che. eTale A pote-ahaMkAra, buddhi kharI emAM, te zaMkA kare che. buddhi ekalI zaMkA nA kare. buddhi ahaMkArasahita zaMkA kare. eTale e 'pote' thayo. AtmAnI zaMkA kare, AtmA 'poteApa !'' A ja pote AtmA che ane te pote potAnI zaMkA kare che. eTale 'enA' vagara zaMkA bIjo koNa kare ? e zaMkA krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha karatuM nathI ke mana karatuM nathI ke buddhi karatI nathI. AtmAnI zaMkA AtmA ja kare che. e ajAyabI che, ema kahe che. pote potAnI zaMkA kare che. kAraNa ke A to eTaluM badhuM ajJAna phelAyuM che ke pote potAnI zaMkA karato thaI gayo che ke 'huM chuM ke nahIM ?" evuM kahevA mAge che. kRpALudevanuM A bahu sarasa vAkya che, paNa samaje to ! praznakartA : zaMkA paDe te pratiSThita AtmAnuM kAma ? AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : AmAM, mULa AtmAne zaMkA paDe ja nahIM. ane pratiSThita AtmA to zaMkAzIla ja che ne ! ane e ApaNe pratiSThA jevI karI che. ApaNe mUrtimAM pratiSThA karIe te jevI pratiSThA karIe tevuM phaLa Ape e. evuM A ye mUrtimAM pratiSThA karI che. pelI mUrtimAM ne AmAM phera ja nathI. AmAM jevI pratiSThA karI che evuM A ekaluM ja phaLa Apaze. je pratiSThA sArI karelI, te sAruM phaLa Ape. praznakartA : eTale pratiSThita AtmA zuddhAtmAnI zaMkA kare che ! dAdAzrI : hA. pratiSThita AtmA. meM pratiSThita AtmA nAma ApyuM che. bAkI, Ama A lokoe vyavahAra AtmA kahyo che. je tuM atyAre AtmA mAnI rahyo che te vyavahArika AtmA che, evuM kahyuM che. paNa vyavahArika AtmAmAM zuM thAya che ? ke e lokone samajAtuM nathI. paNa pharI A UbhuM karanAra ja 'tame' cho, pratiSThA karo cho mATe A UbhuM thAya che. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM, huM caMdubhAI ja chuM' karyA karazo to pharI AtmA Ubho thaI rahyo che tamAro, bIjI pratiSThA thaI rahI che. mUrtirUpe mAno cho mATe mUrtimAM pratiSThA thaI, mATe mUrtino janma thaze. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' to UDI jaze. prajJA AtmApakSI ja ! praznakartA huM zuddhAtmA chuM ane deha nathI, e paNa buddhi kahe che ne ? dAdAzrI : e buddhi nathI kahetI AmAM. buddhi to 'huM zuddhAtmA' kahevA ja nA de. buddhi, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM kahe to eno potAno bahu moTo nAza thAya, enuM potAnuM astitva UDI jAya. eTale e pote A zuddhAtmAnA pakSamAM bese ja nahIM koI dahADo ya. nahIM to potAnuM astitva ja UDI jAya. jo 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' bole, to mana-buddhi-citta ne ahaMkAranuM astitva UDI jAya. eTale A mana paNa AvuM 'eksepTa nA kare. samaje kharA, paNa 'eksepTa' nA kare. A buddhi to haMmezAM saMsAra pakSamAM ja hoya che, zuddhAtmA pakSamAM hoya nahIM kyAreya paNa, virodha hoya. have e prajJA nAmanI zakti che te AtmAmAMthI judI paDelI hoya che, ke jyAM sudhI saMsAramAM che tyAM sudhI AtmAne kazuM karavuM paDatuM nathI. AtmAnI eka 'prajJA' nAmanI zakti bahAra paDe che. enuM kAma zuM ?

Page #91
131 AptavANI-9 dina-rAta 'ene' 'e A bAju ja pherava pherava kare che. A bAju ene mokSe laI javA mATe ja Akho dahADo mAthAkUTa karyA kare che ane 'ajJA' nAmanI zakti jene buddhi kahevAmAM Ave che e rAta-dahADo saMsAramAM ja kheMcI javA mAge che. A benuM saMgharSaNa hoya che aMdara. A benuM saMgharSaNa niraMtara cAlyA ja kare. 'ajJA" e buddhi che ane 'prajJA" e mULa vastu che. 'prajJA' haMmezAM ya 'tamane' aMdara cetave che ane mokSa bAju laI javA phare che. e prajJAzakti utpanna thayelI che. sthitaprajJa dazA karatAM prajJAzakti bahu UMcI che. sthitaprajJa dazAmAM to vyavahArano ekko hoya. bIjuM, lokonAM taraphanI niMdA, evI vastu nA hoya. e enI jAtane sthitaprajJa mAnI zake. kAraNa ke enI buddhi sthira thaI che. paNa A prajJA, e to mokSe laI jAya. sthitaprajJavALAne mokSe javAne mATe haju AgaLa badho mArga joIze. 132. AptavANI-9 ke TheTha AtmA saMbaMdhamAM niHzaMka nA thAya, ke A ja AtmA ane A hoya, tyAM sudhI niHzaMkatA utpanna thAya nahIM. AtmA saMbaMdhamAM niHzaMkatA utpanna thaI, to 'varlDamAM koI zakti ane bhayakArI banI zake nahIM. nirbhayatA ! ane nirbhayatA utpanna thAya eTale saMgamAM rahevA chatAM niHsaMga rahevAya. bhayaMkara saMgomAM rahevA chatAM ya niHsaMgatA hoya. evuM A kRpALudeva kahevA mAge che. varlDamAM ya koI mANasa AtmA saMbaMdhI niHzaMka eTale zaMkArahita thayelo nahIM. jo niHzaMka thayo hota to eno ukela AvI jAta ane bIjAM pAMca jaNano ukela lAvI Apata. A to loko ye bhaTakayA ane e ya bhaTake che. tyAre thAya tiHzaMkatA ! AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA jAya to jANavuM ke mokSa thaI gayo. 'AtmA A ja che" evI ApaNA manamAM khAtarI thaI gaI ke badhuM kAma thaI gayuM ! niHzaMkatA - nirbhayatA - asaMgatA - mokSa ! bAkI, jyAM zaMkA tyAM duHkha hoya. ane "huM zuddhAtmA to niHzaMka thaI gayo, eTale du:kha gayuM. eTale niHzaMka thAya to ja kAma cAlaze. niHzaMka thavuM e ja mokSa. pachI kyAreya paNa zaMkA nA thAya, enuM nAma mokSa. eTale ahIM badhuM ya pUchI zakAya. zaMkA kADhavA mATe to A 'jJAnI puruSa' che. badhI ja jAtanI zaMkAo UbhI thayelI hoya ne, tyAre "jJAnI puruSa" ApaNane niHzaMka banAvI Ape. niHzaMkatAthI nirbhayatA utpanna thAya che ane nirbhayatAthI asaMgatA utpanna thAya che. asaMgatA e ja mokSa kahevAya che. kRpALudeve to zuM kahyuM? 'niHzaMkatAthI nirbhayatA utpanna hoya che ane tethI niHsaMgatA prApta hoya che." have A zaMkA eTale, jJAnanI zarUAtathI, jJAnamAM zaMkA ene ahIM AgaLa adhyAtmamAM zaMkA kahevAmAM Ave che. jJAna ane jJAnanAM sAdhano para zaMkA paDI, enuM nAma zaMkA ! te kyAM sudhI zaMkA gaNAya che ? bAkI, koI avatAramAM niHzaMka thayelo ja nahIM ane AtmA saMbaMdhI to koI niHzaMka thayelo ja nahIM. AtmA saMbaMdhI niHzaMka thavuM e kaMI sahelI vAta nathI. jyAre A 'jJAna' niHzaMka karanAruM che. niHzaMka kevI rIte thAya ? ke A zarIramAM mana-buddhi-citta-ahaMkAra, bIjI indriyo, badhI karmendriyo, badhAM ekAmata thAya tyAre niHzaMka thAya. AkhA zarIranuM badhuM ekamata thAya, 'dAdA'e kahyuM e jJAna eka avAja thAya, badhAM 'eksepTa kare tyAre niHzaMka thAya. have mahIM zaMkA nathI karatuM ne ? nahIM to eka kalAka zaMkA karyA vagara nA rahe, A eTalI badhI mahIM jamAta che. ahIM badhAM 'eksepTa' kare evuM jJAna hoya nahIM. kAM to mana bUmo pADatuM hoya, kAM to citta bUmo pADatuM hoya. paNa koIne koI vAMka pADyA vagara rahe nahIM. eTale mahIM ekamata thAya evA nathI. mahIM bahu jamAta che, ekAda jaNa ADuM bole 'Ama hoya to ?" ke zaMkA paDI ! ane tamAre to koI mahIM bolato ja nathI ne ?! badhAM ekAmata ekAjata ne ?! eTale mahIM badhAM ekAmata thAya tyAre niHzaMka thAya. A zarIramAM koI dahADo badhAM ekAmata ekAjata thatAM ja nathI.

Page #92
AptavANI-9 133 mUcchamAM paDe tyAre ThIka che. mUccha eTale dArU pIdhelo ! mahIM dArU pIvaDAvavo, eTale pachI badhAM mastImAM rahe. ane A to 'vidhAuTa' mUrchA ! ane A 'jJAna' to mUrchA thoDI caDhelI hoya ne, to ya utArI Ape. eTale AtmA saMbaMdhI badhAM zaMkAmAM hoya, game tyAM jAva. badhAMne AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA, ne zaMkAne laIne ahIM paDI rahyAM che. e niHzaMka thAya nahIM ne emano dahADo vaLe nahIM. 'jJAnI puruSa' vagara AtmAmAM niHzaMka to koI jagyAe koI thayelo ja nahIM, eka paNa mANasa niHzaMka thayelo nahIM, AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA ja rahyA kare. loka to saMdeha vagaranuM jJAna khoLe che paNa e jJAna lokonI pAse hotuM nathI. kramikamArgamAM paNa e jJAna hotuM nathI. A to "akrama'nuM che, eTale banyuM che. e zaMkA jAya to kAma thAya. A to dara asala AtmA ahIM prApta thAya che tethI eka kalAkamAM niHzaMka thAya che. A jevI tevI sAhebI nathI. paNa manuSyone samajAtuM nathI, akrama sAhebI che A to ! nahIM to karoDa avatAreya AtmA saMbaMdhamAM niHzaMka nA thAya ne AtmA lakSamAM ja nA Ave koI dahADoya. 'jJAnI puruSa' sivAya AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA koI dahADo jaze nahIM. ane jyAM sudhI AtmA saMbaMdhI niHzaMka na thAya tyAM sudhI saMsAramAMya koI paNa zaMkA jAya nahIM. AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA gaI ke badhI zaMkAo nirAvaraNa thaI gaI. to ApaNe tyAM to AtmA saMbaMdhI zaMkA pachI rahetI ja nathI. bheda vijJAta "akrama' thakI ! zaMkA koI jagyAe nahIM karavI. zaMkA jevuM du:kha nathI A duniyAmAM. kAraNa ke meM tamane AtmA Apyo che, niHzaMka AtmA Apyo che, kyAreya paNa zaMkA utpanna nA thAya evo AtmA Apelo che. eTale 'Avo haze ke tevo haze' evI bhAMjagaDa ja maTI gaI ne ! A to akrama vijJAna' che eTale zuddha AtmA ja cokhkho prApta thaI jAya che. evuM che ne, A zarIramAM be bhAga che. eka AtmavibhAga, e potAnuM kSetra che ane eka anAtmavibhAga, e parakSetra che. e be bhAga jyAM 134 AptavANI-9 sudhI jagata jANatuM nathI, tyAM sudhI 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' bolyA kare che. ApaNe ahIM jJAna ApIe chIe ne, e 'akramavijJAna' che ! akrama vijJAna eTale zuM ? ke AtmA ane anAtmAnuM vivaraNa paDI beu judA paDI jAya che. AtmA AtmavibhAgamAM beTho, svakSetramAM beTho, ane anAtmA parakSetramAM, ema vibhAjana thaI gayuM. eTale 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' paDI jAya, ane badhuM regyulara korsamAM ja besI jAya che. ane bahAra je AtmA che e bheLavALo che. ApaNe ahIM bajAramAM bheLa ATha rUpiye kilo maLe che ne, enA jeTalI kiMmatano e AtmA che. te ya 'milcara', kazo svAda Ave nahIM, besvAda thAya. jyAre A to tarata ja svAda Avato lAge. svataMtratA potAnI utpanna thaI gaI. have phakta 'phAIlono nikAla karavAno bAkI rahyo. tyAM sudhI inTrIma gavarnamenTa' ane 'phAIlo' pUrI thaI gaI ke 'phula gavarnamenTa'! pachI jokhamadArI ja nahIM have 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e jJAna upara to tamane zaMkA paDI gaI ne ? ke zaMkA nathI paDI ? praznakartA : zaMkA paDI che. eTale huM AtmArUpa chuM ane caMdubhAI e parasattA che, pADozI che. dAdAzrI : hA, caMdubhAI e pADozI che. have eka 'ploTa' hoya, te jyAM sudhI te be bhAIono bhego hoya to tyAM sudhI AkhA 'ploTa'mAM je kaMI thAya te bannene nukasAna kahevAya. paNa pachI bannee vaheMcaNa karI nAkhyuM hoya ke A bAju caMdubhAInuM ane A bAju bIjA bhAInuM. to tamAruM vaheMcaNa thayA pachI pelA bhAganA tame javAbadAra nathI. eTale evuM AtmA ane anAtmAnI vaheMcaNa thaI che. emAM vacce 'lAIna opha DimArkazana' meM nAkhelI che, "ekajhekTa' nAkhelI che. evuM to A kALamAM vijJAna UbhuM thayuM che, teno lAbha ApaNe uThAvI levAno che. AtmA ane anAtmA, banne vacce 'lAIna opha DimArkezana'

Page #93
AptavANI-9 135 nAkhI eTale have 'caMdubhAI' joDe 'tamAre' pADozIno saMbaMdha rahyo. have pADozI je guno kare, enA gunegAra ApaNe nahIM. mAlikIpaNuM nahIM eTale gunegAra nahIM. mAlikIpaNuM hoya tyAM sudhI ja guno gaNAya. mAlikIpaNuM gayuM eTale guno rahyo nahIM. ApaNe pUchIe ke, 'tame kema nIce joIne cAlo cho ?" tyAre e kaheze, 'nA joIe to paga nIce jIvaDuM vaTAI jAya ne !' 'to kema, A paga tamAro che ?' evuM pUchIe, to kaheze, 'hA, bhAI, paga to mAro ja ne !' evuM kahe ke nA kahe ? eTale 'A paga tamAro, to paga nIce jIvaDuM vaTAI gayuM tenA jokhamadAra tame !' ane A 'jJAna' pachI tamane to 'A deha mAro nathI' evuM jJAna hAjara rahe che. eTale tame mAlikIpaNuM choDI dIdhuM che. A 'jJAna' ApatI vakhate ahIM AgaLa mAlikIpaNuM badhuM huM laI lauM chuM. eTale pachI tame mAlikIpaNuM pAchuM kheMco to enI jokhamadArI Ave. paNa jo tame mAlikIpaNuM pAchuM nA kheMco ne, to 'ekajhekTa' rahe. niraMtara bhagavAna mahAvIra jevI dazA rAkhe evuM A vijJAna che ! eTale A bahArano, zarIrano A bhAga je kaMI kare emAM tamAre AMgaLI nahIM karavAnI. to tame nAmeya jokhamadAra nahIM. ane kazuM karI zakatAya nathI. 'pote' kazuM karI zake che, ema 'pote' mAne che, e ja aNasamajaNa che, enAthI Avato bhava bagADe che. mahIM dhULa UDatI hoya ne, to sAmI bAju nA dekhAya. evuM karmanI jaMjALane laIne sAmI bAju dekhAya nahIM, ne gUMcave. paNa jo ema jAgRti rahe ke 'huM to zuddhAtmA chuM' to e jaMjALa UDI jAya. eTale mahAvIra bhagavAna jevI dazA rahe evAM A pAMca vAkyo (pAMca AjJA) tamane ApelAM che !! mArga saraLa che, sahelo che, sahaja che. paNa tenI prApti durlabha che. 'jJAnI puruSa' bhegA thavA bahu muzkela vastu che. bhegA thAya to 'jJAna' maLavuM muzkela vastu che. keTalAka sAta sAta varSathI dhakkA khAya che, toye 'jJAna' nathI maLyuM. keTalAka traNa varSathI dhakkA khAya che ane 'jJAna' nathI maLatuM. ne keTalAkane eka kalAkamAM maLI gayeluM. evuM sahu sahunA saMjogo 136 judI jAtanA hoya ne ! AptavANI-9 pustakathI ta chUTe saMdeha ! praznakartA : paNa dAdA, Ama to dehadhArI manuSya mAraphata ja e prakriyA thAya ne ! dehadhArI manuSyamAM ja bhagavAna pragaTe ane to ja saMdeha chUTe ne ? pustakamAMthI saMdeha nA chUTe ne ! dAdAzrI : pustakamAM kazuM hoya nahIM ne kazuM vaLe nahIM. pustakamAM to lakheluM hoya ke 'sAkara gaLI che.' emAM ApaNu moDhuM zuM gaLyuM thayuM ? pustakamAM 'sAkara gaLI che' ema lakhyuM che, paNa emAM ApaNane zuM phAyado thayo ? moDhAmAM mUkIe to gaLI lAge ne ?! praznakartA : eTale dehadhArI manuSya, jemAM bhagavAna pragaTa thayA hoya, evA maLatA nathI, ane pustako kaMI kAma karatAM nathI, eTale pachI pharyA karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : hA, bhaTakavAnuM ja basa. praznakartA : A dukAnethI pelI dukAne ne pelI dukAnethI bIjI dukAne. dAdAzrI : hA, dukAno ne dukAno pharyA ja kare. praznakartA : ane jeTalI dukAna pharatA jaIe tema tema nakalI mAla vadhato jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, vadhato jAya. ane 'ahIMthI maLaze ke tyAM maLaze ?" evA vikalpo UbhA thayA kare. e to chellI dukAna maLe tyAre ukela Ave ane teya saMdeha jAya badhI vAte to ukela Ave. e jANeluM to zaMkA karAve ! kAraNa ke zaMkA kyAre thAya ? bahu vAMca vAMca karyuM hoya ne, te badhuM AgaLa AgaLa paDaghA pADyA kare. eTale mANasa tyAM AgaLa gUMcAI jAya. ne gUMcAI jAya eTale saMdeha UbhA thAya, zaMkA UbhI thAya. e

Page #94
AptavANI-9 137 zaMkAo ja A saMsAranI bahAra nIkaLavA detI nathI. zAstrano paricaya hoya ghaNA kALano eTale pachI ApaNane mahIM zaMkAo UbhI thAya. eTale jeTaluM jANe che eTaluM e to UlaTuM vadhAre khUMce. e jANelAne bhagavAne 'ovaravAIjhapaNuM' kahyuM che. A tame vakIla thaI gayA to enuM ovaravAIjhapaNuM tamane khUMcyA kare. 'vAIpha" khAMDa levA gayA hoya ane te kALA bajAranI letAM hoya, to ya tamArA manamAM ema thAya ke "e nA karIza, nA karIza." eTale vakIlane ahIM koI kArya karavuM hoya ne, to zaMkA UbhI thAya ke 'A karIza to mane amuka kAyado lAgu thaze,' to e sTezane javAnuM emane rahI jAya ne bIje cAlyA jAya ! A to vizeSa jANeluM teno A prabhAva ! te dhakkA vAgyA kare. peluM jANeluM ne, tethI. ethI ame kahyuM ne, ke "kaMI ja jANato nathI" ema karIne phrekacara karI nAkhI do ne, badho mAla ! A to badhA zeraDInA kucA che. koI jAtanI 'helpa' karI ja nathI ne ! A to manamAM mAnI bese che ke A ANe "helpa' karyuM. paNa koI jAtanI 'helpa' karI nathI. nathI ciMtA maTI, nathI ahaMkAra ghaTyo; nathI krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha gayA. eTale anAdino jUno kakaLATiyo mAla, ene nAkhI do ne ! eTale ja kahIe chIe ApaNe ke 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI eTalo bhAva karo ne ! A jANeluM to badhuM poka mukAve che. jenAthI kaSAya ja gayA nahIM ne ! eTale A to kazuM ja jANyuM nathI. jo jANeluM hoya to to kaSAya upazama thayelA dekhAya. ane to ya paNa emAM kazuM dahADo vaLato nathI. kAraNa ke e upazama thayelA kyAre caDhI vAge che enuM kaMI ThekANuM nathI. A to potAnI akkalathI mahIM nAkhyA karaze. te potAnI akkalathI to mAra khAdhA che, anaMta avatArathI AnA A ja mAra khAdhA che. eTale 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI" e bhAva karyo hoya ne, to ukela Ave. ApaNA eka mahAtmAe zAstro bahu vAMcyA hatA. te A jJAna levA AvyA tyAre meM kahyuM ke, "A tamAruM ThIMkaruM che ne, tamAro dUdhapAka che ne, te mane dekhADo joIe.' te emaNe dekhADayo. tyAre meM kahyuM, A dudhapAka laIne tame maracAvALAne pUcho ke sAheba A mahIM nakhAya ? 138 AptavANI-9 tyAre maracAvALo to ene vecavuM che, eTale ema kahe ke hA, sAheba, thoDuM nakhAya. pachI mIThAvALAne tame pUcho ke sAheba, A nakhAya ? tyAre pelo kaheze, Aye nakhAya. kAraNa ke A lokone pUchavA jAya che ne, te pachI pelAM to nakhAvaDAve. ema tamAro dUdhapAka moTuM bagADe che." tethI ame A dUdhapAka nakhAvI daIe chIe, ThIMkarA sAthe nakhAvI daIe chIe. e sugaMdheya nA joIe. eTale atyAra sudhI jANeluM badhuM ja khoTuM hatuM. je jANyAe ApaNane helpa nA karI, krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha gayAM nahIM, je jANavAthI AtmA prApta nA thayo, to pachI e jANyAno artha ja zuM ? ane je jANavAthI AtmA prApta thayo che to bIjuM jANavAnI jarUra nathI. ko'kane ema lAgatuM hoya ke emanA jANavAthI emane AtmA prApta thaI gayo che, to pachI A jANavAnI jarUra ja nathI, A akramavijJAna che. peluM kramika che. eTale ko'kane prApta thayo ema lAgatuM hoya to milcara karavAnI jarUra nathI. A ekanI mahIM bIjuM mizra karavAno phAyado nathI. je jAtanI ApaNe davA pItA hoIe e ja pIyA karavI sArI che. pAchuM bIjuM milcara karIe to UlaTuM navI muzkelIo UbhI thAya. eTale milcara karIne zuM kAma che ApaNe ? kapALudeve zuM kahyuM ke, je raste, jenAthI saMsAramaLa jAya ApaNo te rasto tuM sevaje. to e sevavAno. kAraNa ke ApaNe maLa jAya eTaluM ja jovuM che ne ? ApaNuM kAmeya bIjuM zuM che ?! eTale jeTalA zaMkAvALA che ne, ene A saMsAra choDato nathI. kaMI paNa saMzaya, saMmoha ke zaMkA kiMcitmAtra hoya tyAM sudhI A saMsAra ane mukta karato nathI. A saMsAra tethI ja baMdhAyelo che. zaMkA UbhI thAya eTale tamAruM kArya thAya nahIM. enA karatAM abhaNa mANaso sArA. A zAstronA jANakAro badhA zaMkAzIla, saMdehamAM gaLathaLa thaI rahyA che. enA karatAM ApaNA "jJAna" lIdhelA koI mahAtmAne zaMkA ja nathI utpanna thaI. kAraNa ke A vadhAre vAMcyuM hoya to zaMkA thAya ne ? eTale niHzaMka thaI jAya che, eno AtmA niraMtara paramAnaMda Ape. bAkI A jagata zaMkAthI ja phasAyuM che ne ! bhAgye ja ApaNA 'jJAna lIdhelA koI mahAtmAne eka kSaNa AtmA saMbaMdhamAM zaMkA UbhI

Page #95
AptavANI-9 139 thaI hoya ! AvuM to banyuM ja nathI, sAMbhaLyuM ja nathI ne ! ahIM to zaMkA jevI vastu ja sAMbhaLI nathI. praznakartA: jeNe pahelAM AvI vastu sAMbhaLI ja nA hoya ene zaMkA nA Ave. paNa jeNe sAMbhaLI hoya tene ema lAge ke A sAcuM ke peluM sAcuM ? dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, sAMbhaLyuM hoya chatAM zaMkA nathI AvatI enuM zuM kAraNa ? A "jJAna" lIdhA pachI emane potAne mahIM evo anubhava thaI gayo ke niraMtara AtmA mAro jato nathI, rAte be vAge huM jANuM chuM. te pahelAM to e hAjara thaI jAya che. te AvuM to A "varlDa'mAM bane evuM nathI koI jagyAe, AtmA enI meLe hAjara thAya evuM bane nahIM. A to anubhava kahevAya che. AtmA prApta thAya ene anubhava kahevAya, AtmAnuM lakSa beThuM ene anubhava kahevAya. kAraNa ke pote jAgatA pahelAM to e AtmA hAjara thaI jAya. eTale jene zaMkA gaI tene saMpUrNa AtmA prApta thaI gayo. bAkI 'AtmA kevo che e saMdeha koIno jAya evo ja nathI. 'AtmA che" e saMdeha vakhate jAya, paNa 'AtmA kevo che' e saMdeha nathI jAya evo. e vastu bahu UMDI che. eTale jyAM zaMkA tyAM saMtApa Ubho thAya. zaMkA eka kSaNa nA thAya enuM nAma AtmA ! eTale koI paNa jAtanI zaMkA nA rahe. e bhula khoLavAnI ! zaMkA jAya ke ukela AvI gayo. have zaMkA UDI javI e to potAnA hisAbamAM besavI joIe ne ? sAmAnI zaMkA UDI gaI, mATe kaMI ApaNI zaMkA UDI gaI ? kAraNa ke badhAne sarakhI zaMkA nathI hotI. mATe ApaNI jAtane pUchavuM joIe ke, 'zaMkA kaI kaI bAbatamAM che ?" tyAre kaheze, "nA, have koI zaMkA nathI.' ane jene haju thoDI thoDI zaMkA hoya te pachI thoDA TAIma ahIM besI rahe, ne amane pUche kare to pachI e zaMkA jatI rahe ane zaMkA gaI eTale ukela AvI gayo. praznakartA: tame kaho cho ne, ke tuM koNa che? tyAre mane 'huM zuddhAtmA 14) AptavANI-9 chuM" enI zaMkA rahe che. dAdAzrI : 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e tamane zaMkA rahe che to e zaMkA je kare che te ja zuddhAtmA che. eTale "ApaNe" ahIM nathI besatA, te jagyAe besavAnuM have, koNa zaMkA kare che e khoLI kADhavuM ke A to ApaNI ja bhUla che. evI zaMkA ? tyAM "jJAta' hAjara ! A "jJAna" pachI have tame kaMI kAma karavA jAva ne, to 'doSa to baMdhAya nahIM ?" evI zaMkA thaI, te vakhate AtmA hAjara hato mATe tamArI eka zaMkA UDI gaI. nahIM to AvI zaMkA kone thAya ? A jagatanAM lokone evI zaMkA thAya ? zAthI nA thAya ? AtmA hAjara ja nathI tyAM AgaLa ! eTale zaMkA kone thAya ? 'kartA chuM' evI zaMkA kone paDe ? eTale ApaNe zaMkA paDe tyAre jANavuM ke AtmA hAjara hato. mATe e zaMkA UDI gaI. praznakartA : jyAM sudhI jJAnajyoti jalatI rahe e ja vakhate zaMkA Ave. jJAnajyoti nahIM hoya to zaMkA kyAMthI Ave ? dAdAzrI : hA. moTaranI AgaLa prakAza hoya to khabara paDe ke jIvaDAM moTarathI vaTAya che. paNa prakAza ja nA hoya to ? zaMkA ja nA paDe ne ! A to ApaNe 'jJAna' ApyuM eTale tanmayAkAra thatuM ja nathI. pachI potAne manamAM ema lAge ke huM ekAkAra thaI gayo hoIza ?" paNa nA, e zaMkA paDe che. ane ene bhagavAne kahyuM ke "zaMkA paDe che ? mATe tuM jJAnamAM ja che." kAraNa ke bIjA mANasane zaMkA paDe nahIM ke huM tanmayAkAra thaI gayo chuM. e loko to tanmayAkAra che ja. ane tamane to A 'jJAna' maLyuM che eTale tamane zaMkA paDe ke 'huM A tanmayAkAra thaI gayo hoIza ke zuM ?" e zaMkA paDI ! toya bhagavAna kahe che, "e zaMkA ame mApha karIe chIe.' koI kaheze, 'bhagavAna, kema mApha karo

Page #96
141 AptavANI-9 cho ?" tyAre bhagavAna zuM kahe che ? 'e tanmayAkAra nathI thayo, enI samajaNamAM phera che.' e tanmayAkAra nathI thayo. paNa A to khAlI zaMkA paDelI che. bIjAne kema zaMkA nathI paDatI ? bIjAne zaMkA paDe kharI ? nA. e lokone 'huM chuTo chuM" evuM vicAramAM ja nathI AvyuM. eTale tame chuTTA ja cho. ane to ye 'huM tanmayAkAra thaI gayo hoIza ke zuM ?" te zaMkA paDI toye bhagavAna 'leTa-go' kare che. paNa chevaTe e dhIme dhIme abhyAsa karI, eya zaMkA nA paDavI joIe, ema bhagavAna kahe che. tija zuddhatvamAM niHzaMkatA ! dara asala AtmA to 'AkAza' jevo che, ane A zuddhAtmA e to eka saMjJA che. zI saMjJA che ? praznakartA : oLakhavA mATe. dAdAzrI : nA. A dehathI game eTalA tArAthI kArya thAya, sArAM thAya ke khoTAM thAya, tuM to zuddha ja che. tyAre koI kahe ke, "he bhagavAna, huM zuddha ja chuM? paNa A dehe avaLA kAma thAya te ?" toya bhagavAna kahe, 'e kArya tArAM hoya. tuM to zuddha ja che. paNa jo tuM mAne ke A kArya mArAM, to tane coMTaze.' eTalA mATe zuddhAtmA zabda, e saMjJA lakhelI che. ane 'zuddhAtmA' zAthI kahyuM "ene' ? ke Akho saMsAra kALa pUro thavA chatAM 'ene' azuddhatA aDatI nathI, eTale zuddha ja che. paNa 'zuddhAtmA'nI 'potAne' 'bilipha' nA bese ne ? 'huM' zuddha kevI rIte ? 'mArAthI ATalAM pApa thAya che, mArAthI Ama thAya che, tema thAya che." eTale huM zuddha chuM e 'bilipha' 'ene' bese nahIM, ne zaMkA rahyA kare ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM kevI rIte kahevAya ? mane zaMkA che." eTale A jJAna' pachI have 'tane' huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSa beThuM che. mATe have tArAthI game te kArya thAya, sAruM agara narasuM, e banneno mAlika "tuM" nathI. 'tuM zuddha ja che. tane puNyano DAgha paDavAno nathI ane 142 AptavANI-9 pApanoye DAgho paDavAno nathI. mATe "tuM" zuddha ja che. tane zubhanoye DAgho paDavAno nathI ane azubhanoya DAgho paDavAno nathI. ame "jJAna" ApatAMnI sAthe ja kahIe chIe ne, ke have tane A badhuM nahIM aDe. e niHzaMka thAya tyAra pachI enuM gADuM cAle. tane jo zaMkA paDaze to tane coMTaze ane tuM niHzaMka che to tane nahIM aDe ! 'dAdA'nI AjJAmAM rahyo ke tane nahIM aDe ! mULa hakIkatamAM, zaMkA pADavA jevI che ja nahIM. kharekhara kazuM karato ja nathI. AvI "tuM" koI kriyA karato ja nathI. A to khAlI bhrAMti ja che, AMTI paDI gayelI che. eTale zuddhAtmA te saMjJA, pote zuddha ja che, traNeya kALa zuddha ja che, e samajAvavA mATe che. mATe e saMjJAmAM rahevAya eTale pachI majabUta thaI jAya. tyAra pachI 'kevaLajJAna svarUpa" ApaNuM ! bAkI, 'daraasala AtmA' to 'kevaLajJAna svarUpI' ja che. eTale amArAmAM ne tamArAmAM phera zo ? 'ame' 'kevaLajJAna svarUpe' rahIe chIe ane 'tame' (mahAtmAo) zuddhAtmA tarIke raho cho. tamane mULa AtmAnI je zaMkA hatI te jatI rahI, eTale bIjI zaMkAo jatI rahe. paNa chatAMya mahIM buddhizALI mANasoneya pAchI zaMkA, mULa svabhAva e hoya ne, to pharI zaMkA UbhI thaI jAya. zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM che ja kyAM ?! praznakartA : ApanI pAse have chevaTanuM e lAge che ke have koI ThekANe zaMkA rahI nathI ne ame 'kanvInsa' thaI gayA chIe. dAdAzrI : hA, ahIM zaMkA rahe nahIM ne ! ane zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM jagata ja nathI. jo zaMkA rAkhavA jevuM jagata hota ne, to huM tamane kahetA ja nahIM ke "heya, mArI gerahAjarImAM tame AvI tevI zaMkA nA karazo.' A to meM tamane khAjo, pIjo, badhuMya kahyuM. ane AvI zaMkA ne e badhuM nA karazo, emeya kahyuM, kAraNa ke niHzaMka jagata meM joyuM che, tyAre ja huM tamane kahuM ne ?! jagata meM joyuM che niHzaMka, te A dizAmAM niHzaMka che ane bIjI A dizAmAM zaMkAvALuM che. to A niHzaMkavALI dizA batADI dauM, eTale pachI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM ne !

Page #97
AptavANI-9 143 have zaMkA ja nA rAkhe to cAle evuM che ke nathI cAle evuM ? praznakartA : e to sAruM cAle ne ! paNa evuM hovuM joIe ne !! dAdAzrI : thaI jAya e to pachI ! bAkI A hindustAnanI prajA vahemothI, zaMkAthI, bIkathI mArI nAkhelI prajA che ! eTale A zaMkA zabda to AkhI duniyAno huM kADhavA mAguM chuM. e zaMkA zabda kADhI nAkhavA jevo che. 'varlDa'mAM enA jevuM koI bhUta nathI. ane tethI ja ghaNAkharA loko duHkhI che, zaMkAthI ja duHkhI che. ane zA sAru vahemo rAkhavAnA te ?! A vahema to rAkhavA jevo ja nathI, duniyAmAM ! koI jAtano vahema rAkhavA jevo nathI. vahema e 'helsiMga problema' nathI. vahema e nukasAnakAraka 'problema' che. je che ethI vadhAre nukasAna karaze. ane je nukasAna thavAnuM che emAM koI vAMdho nathI AvavAno. mATe vahemane choDI do. huM to eTaluM ja kaheto Avyo chuM, ne choDAvI dIdhA ghaNA kharA ne ! have A badhuM mArA anubhavapUrvakanuM jJAna che. A to mArA anubhava ja mUkyA che badhA, ane teya 'epropriyeTa' ! A mArI kSaNe kSaNe jAgRtinA anubhavo mUkyA che. ane A ekalI atyAranI 'lAIpha'nuM nathI, paNa anaMta avatAranI 'lAIpha'nuM che ! ane teya pAchuM maulika che. zAstramAM nahIM jaDe toya vAMdho nathI, paNa maulika che !! 'DiliMga' pudgalatA, 'pote' vItarAga ! praznakartA : vItarAga koNa hoI zake ne vItarAganI kevI dazA hoya enAM varNano zAstromAM vAMcelAM, paNa dehadhArI vItarAga jovA nahIM maLelA.... dAdAzrI : nA maLe. vItarAganAM to darzana karavAnAM nA maLe. A kALamAM to huM nApAsa thayelo, te rakhaDI maryo chuM. eTale A badhAMne darzana karavAnAM maLyA. nahIM to A kevaLajJAnanI thoDuMka najIka pahoMcelA, emanAM darzana karavAnAMya nA maLe. A to darzana karavAnA maLyA to vItarAgatAnuM varNana samajI zake ke vItarAgatA kevI hoya ! ane ame tevuM rahIe. AptavANI-9 juo ne, koInI joDe matabheda ke kazI bhAMjagaDa che amAre ? sAmo avaLuM bole toya kazI bhAMjagaDa che ? amane AvaDe enI joDe kevI rIte 'DiliMga' karavuM te ! vItarAga rahevuM ane 'DiliMga' karavuM, beu sAthe rAkhavuM, 'DiliMga' pudgala kare ane amAre vItarAga rahevAnuM ! eTale vItarAgatA jovAnI maLI A kALamAM, jo samaje to ! UMDA Utare ne, to 'pyora' vItarAgatA jovAnI maLe. ne amAre jarAya noMdha nahIM rAkhavAnI. ApaNe thaI gayuM e pachI noMdha nahIM rAkhavAnI. noMdhapothI ja kADhI nAkhelI. 144 praznakartA : vakhANa thAya, phUla caDhAve tenIye noMdha nahIM, ne paththara mAre tenIye noMdha nahIM ? dAdAzrI : hA. nahIM to noMdhapothI bhegI thatI, thatI pariNAma avaLuM Ave badhuM, ne enA tarapha draSTi badalAI jAya tamArI. tamane to e jue ne, to ene tamArI draSTi pheraphAravALI lAge. noMdha thaI tenI sAmAne khabara nA paDe ? ke ANe noMdha rAkhI che, gaI phere meM saheja vAta karI hatI enI noMdha che emane, evuM tarata khabara paDe. A lokone jotAM bahu AvaDe, bIjuM to nA AvaDe. paNa Ama sAmAnI AMkha jotAM bahu AvaDe ke zenI noMdha rAkhI che. paNa e amArI AMkhamAM vItarAgatA dekhe eTale tarata samajI jAya ke e ja che 'dAdA', hatA tenA te ja ! amArI AMkhamAM vItarAgatA dekhAya. jema kharAba cAritrano mANasa hoya e enI AMkha uparathI oLakhAya, lobhiyo hoya toya enI AMkha uparathI oLakhAya, evI rIte vItarAga paNa emanI AMkha uparathI oLakhAya. emanI AMkhamAM kazAM cakalAM ramatAM nA hoya, koI jAtanAM cakalAM 2me nahIM ! eTale noMdha amane nA hoya. prema tyAM toMdha tahIM ! ane je prema utpanna thAya teya vadhaghaTa nA thAya evo prema hovo joIe. becAra gALo bhAMDI gayo hoya ne, toya paNa ghaTI nA jAya tyAre e prema kahevAya. ane ghaTI jAya, vadhI jAya e Asakti kahevAya. eno e ja prema jo vadhaghaTa thavAmAM Ave eTale Asakti thaI gaI ! jema Arogya

Page #98
AptavANI-9 145 hoya che, te enuM e ja Arogya jo vadhaghaTa thAya to roga kahevAya ! evI rIte A eno e ja prema jo ghaTavadha thAya eTale Asakti ! chokaro kamAIne lAvyo to vAha, vAha pAcho 'vAha bhaI, vAha' kare. eno eja chokaro daza varSa pachI khovaDAvIne Ave to kahe, 'gAMDo hato, huM kahI kahIne thAkyo ne mAruM magaja pAkI gayuM." baLyo tAro prema, enAM karatAM ApaNI 'koleja'no abhiprAya sAro ke kAyama rahe ApaNI pAse. praznakartA: A varavahunuM paNa evuM ja hoya che ne ? "huM tane cAhuM chuM, huM tane prema karuM chuM" kahe. paNa pachI pAchA jhagaDe. dAdAzrI : AnuM nAma ja Asakti. ThAma nahIM ne ThekANuM nahIM ! moTA cAhavAvALA ! A kharo cAhavAvALo to maratAM sudhI hAtha nA choDe. bIjuM badhuM bane te noMdha levAmAM nA Ave. jyAM prema che tyAM noMdha ja nA hoya. noMdhavahI rAkho ne prema rAkho, be bane nahIM. noMdhavahI rAkhIe ke "Ama karyuM ne tema karyuM to prema nA hoya tyAM AgaLa. A amAre ATalAM badhAM che, paNa koInI noMdha nahIM. badhAMnuM kaMInuM kaMIe thaI jAya to ya paNa noMdha nahIM. bahAre ya noMdha nahIM ne aMdara ya noMdha nahIM. nahIM to amAruM 'TenzananA hoya to ya UbhuM thaI jAya. A to rAtre ke je ghaDIe Avo te ghaDIe ame 'Tenzana'rahita hoIe ne ! eTale bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM ne ! amArI tabiyata mahIM narama thAya to koI kahe, 'dAdA, to hase che !" alyA, 'Tenzana' nahIM tethI hase che !! eTale koInI paMcAtamAM nahIM paDavAnuM. A dehanIya paMcAtamAM paDIe ke 'enuM Ama thaI gayuM, Ama thaI gayuM." to "Tenzana' UbhuM thAya ne ! praznakartA : jyAM prema che tyAM noMdha thatI nathI, e vAta bahu moTI nIkaLI. dAdAzrI : hA, je premamAM noMdha hoya tyAM prema nathI ! A jagatano prema to noMdhavALo che. 'Aje mane AvuM kahI gayA' evuM kahe. tyAre e prema zAno te ?! jo prema che to noMdha nA joIe. nahIM to Asakti thaI jaze. prema vadhaghaTa thAya ene Asakti kahevAya. to A jagata to noMdha rAkhyA vagara rahe ja nahIM ne ! bhale moDhe kahI nA batAve. paNa 146 AptavANI-9 manamAM kaheze, "mane parama dahADe kahI gayA hatA. te enA manamAM rAkhe ne ? eTale noMdha to che ne, enI pAse ? jenI pAse noMdha nahIM teno sAco prema ! amArI pAse noMdhavahI ja nathI, te copaDo ja kyAMthI hoya ?! noMdhavahI hoya to copaDo hoya. have tame noMdhavahI nAkhI dejo. ene koI bIjA zeThane ApI dejo. noMdhavahI nathI rAkhavA jevI ! praznakartA : noMdha rAkhe ke "teM mane AvuM kahyuM, te AvuM kahyuM. tethI vaLI pAcho prema tUTI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa noMdha rAkhyA vagara rahe nahIM. vahu halu rAkhe ne ? tArI vahu nahIM rAkhatI hoya ? praznakartA: dAdA, e to badhA ja rAkhe. paNa jJAna karIne e noMdhane ApaNe pratikramaNa karIne lUchI zakAya kharuM ne ? dAdAzrI : e game ema lUchavA jAva ne, toya kazuM vaLe nahIM. noMdha rAkhI tyAMthI lUchavAthI vaLe nahIM. noMdha DhIlI thAya, paNa e bolyA vagara rahe nahIM ne ? A bhAI game te kare ke tamArAmAM game te pheraphAra thAya toya ame enI noMdha nA rAkhIe. te amAre Dakhala ja nahIM ne, koI jAtanI ! teM joyeluM, 'dAdA'ne koI dahADo noMdha hoya tArI, ema ? praznakartA : kadIye nahIM. dAdAzrI : hA, koInI noMdha nA hoya. praznakartA eTale e zuddha prema kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e zuddha prema kahevAya. eTale tuM mane aLakhAmaNo koI dahADo lAge ja nahIM, tuM mane vahAlo ja lAgyA kare. te parama dahADe avaLuM karyuM hoya, tene mAre kazuM levAdevA nahIM. huM noMdha rAkhuM tyAre bhAMjagaDa ne ?! huM jANuM ke tArAmAM to nabaLAI gaI nathI, tethI UMdhuM thAya ja ne ! praznakartA : paNa mane to noMdha rAkhavAnI bahu Teva che. dAdAzrI : e Teva ja have ochI thavAnI. A vAta sAMbhaLI eTale

Page #99
147 AptavANI-9 tane samajaNa paDI ne ? tuM jyArathI Ane jANe tyArathI noMdha rAkhavAnuM pachI ochuM thAya. tuM to vahunIye noMdha rAkhe che ne ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : je 'vAIpha' potAnI kahevAya. teM enA pareya noMdha rAkhI ?! ane e hau noMdha rAkhe. tuM ATaluM bolI gayo hoya ne, to te kahe "mAro lAga AvavA do !' e sAco prema nahIM, Asakti kahevAya. sAco prema to UtarI nA jAya. amAro prema tadana sAco hoya. ame noMdha ja rAkhIe nahIM ne ! praznakartA : ApanI kRpA thAya to AvuM thaI jAya jaladI. dAdAzrI : te amArI kaMpA che ja, paNa tAre jAte kADhavuM nathI, tyAM zuM thAya ?! 'vahue Ama karyuM, tema karyuM" kare. tyAre tuM evuM nathI karato te vahunuM nAma de che ?! tuM noMdha rAkhe to e noMdha rAkhe. A huM noMdha rAkhavAnuM baMdha karI dauM chuM, to mArI noMdha koI rAkhatuM nathI. koIne vaTuM karuM toya koI noMdha rAkhatuM nathI. enuM kAraNa che, ke mArI noMdha baMdha che. to pachI tamAre noMdha rAkhIne zuM kAma che ?! paNa tuM to tArI vahunI noMdha rAkhe eTale pachI vahu tArI choDe ke tane ? e to sAruM thayuM ke A paiNyo nathI, nahIM to e ya pachI 'vAIphanI noMdha rAkhe ne ?! ame koI dahADo koInI noMdha rAkhIe ja nahIM ne ! ane bIjuM, ame koIne koInI vAta nA karIe. 148 AptavANI-9 eTale pelA AcAramAMthI chUTavuM hoya to AcAra chUTatAM pahelAM pahelI pratIti bese. pachI pAchuM ene anubhava thato jAya. tyAra pachI pelo AcAra chUTe. eTale enAM 'sAyanTiphika rijhalTa'thI Ave ne ?! dAdaro caDhavo hoya to ekadama caDhI javAya che ? e to pagathiye pagathiye ja caDhAya ne ! kaMI ekadama pagathiyuM nA caDhI javAya. A noMdha zabda sAMbhaLyo ja nahoto ne ? A pahelI vakhata ja sAMbhaLyo ne ? noMdha' to baMdhAve vera ? eTale noMdha rAkhavAnI nahIM. noMdha rAkhIne zuM phAyado kADhayo atyAra sudhI ? A to du:kha vadhyAM UlTAM !! mATe noMdha ja nA rAkhIe. teM joyuM nahIM ke A 'dAdAjI' noMdha rAkhatA nathI ? praznakartA : e Aje anubhavamAM AvyuM. nahIM to tame noMdha nathI rAkhatA e khabara paDe nahIM ne ! dAdAzrI : paNa tuM joto hoIza ne, ke 'dAdAjI' kazI noMdha nathI rAkhatA ? praznakartA: hA, noMdha nathI rAkhatA. paNa Apane yAda badhuM ja hoya ne ! dAdAzrI : hA. yAda hoya, paNa noMdha nA hoya. praznakartA : emAM zuM phera, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : noMdha rAkhe eTale to enA mATe mahIM vera rAkhyuM hoya. ane yAda eTale to ameya samajIe ke AnAmAM ATalI nabaLAI rahelI che, eTaluM ja ! te nabaLAI rahI che, mATe ame AzIrvAda ApavA mATe yAda rAkhIe. bAkI, amAre kaMI noMdha nA hoya. amAre noMdha hoya to mArA potAnA mATe vera levAnI vRttio thAya. te huM noMdha nathI rAkhato. ane eTale to mArI noMdha tuMye rAkhato nathI ne ! 'dAdAjI" tane vaDhayA hoya toya tuM noMdha nathI rAkhato. bhUla bhAMgavI, "sAyanTiphiklI' ? praznakartA : dAdA, A je noMdha rakhAya che tenuM kAraNa zuM ? dAdAzrI : A noMdhathI zuM nukasAna che enI ene khabara ja nathI. have nukasAnanI ene samajaNa paDI gaI eTale pachI noMdha ochI thavAnI. tane pratIti beThI ke A tuM noMdha rAkhe che e khoTuM che. have tane e anubhavamAM AvatuM jaze ke noMdha nA rAkhI teno mane phAyado thayo. noMdha nA rAkhI, te pachI dhIme dhIme ene svAdamAM AvatuM ja jAya ke kharekhara A lAbhakArI ja che. pachI AcAramAM Ave. A enI rIta !

Page #100
AptavANI-9 149 praznakartA : dAdAjI vaDhayA hoya toya prema ja hoya. dAdAzrI : hA, eTale noMdha nA rAkhavI joIe. noMdha nahIM rAkho to aDadhuM duHkha to jatuM raheze, ema ne ema ja ! jagatanAM loko noMdha rAkhatA haze ? dhaMdho ja e, noMdha rAkhavAno ja dhaMdho. 'mAruM Ama karI gayA hatA ne tema karI gayA' kaheze. huM noMdha rAkhato nathI eTale tame mArI noMdha rAkho nahIM. tame noMdha rAkho eTale e sAmo noMdha rAkhe ja. tame mArI dukAnethI kazuMka laI jAva to huM noMdha rAkhuM. to tamArI dukAnamAM tame noMdha rAkhyA vagara raho ? huM ja noMdha nA rAkhuM eTale sAmo mArI noMdha nA rAkhe. mArI joDe koNa noMdha rAkhe ! kazuM vaTuM, karuM, game te kahuM toya ?! noMdha nA rAkhI eTale thaI gayuM, badhuM ApaNuM ja thaI gayuM ne ! noMdha rAkhavA jevI nathI. vyavasthita tyAM toMdha nahIM peluM 'rIleTiva' e bhrAMtivALuM jJAna che. emAMthI A badhAnI noMdha rAkhIe karIe, to e noMdha zenA hAru karavAnI ? tArI 'vAIpha' jamatAM pahelAM ema kahI gaI ke, 'tamAro svabhAva kharAba che. huM have mAre piyarathI tyAM AvavAnI nathI." toya ApaNe noMdha nA rAkhIe. kAraNa ke e badhuM 'vyavasthita'ne tAbe che ne ! e kaMI enA tAbAmAM ochuM che ? A enA tAbAmAM che ke "vyavasthita'nA tAbAmAM che ? ane tyAM have tuM noMdha rAkhe ke 'ema ?! ATalo badho ropha ?! cAla, huM joI laIza !' to zuM thAya ? haladIghATa zarU thaI gayuM ! praznakartA : pelI AvuM kahe to te magaja phATI jAya, bahu 'eksAITamenTa' AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, 'eksAITamenTa' AvI jAya, ane mAnasika laDhAI zarU thaI jAya. ane mAnasika laDhAI zarU thaI eTale pachI vAcika laDhAI zarU thAya. ane vAcika thayA pachI kAyika laDhAI zarU thAya. eTale A badhAnuM mULa ja, mULamAMthI ja UDADI mUkIe to ?! rUTa' UDADI mUkIe ke cokhuM ! eTale A bhAMjagaDamAM paDavA jevuM ja nathI. 150 AptavANI-9 eTale A noMdha ja rAkhavA jevuM nathI. 'vyavasthita' zene kahevAya? ke je vastunI ApaNe noMdha ja nA rAkhIe. enuM nAma "vyavasthita'. noMdha rAkhIe ene 'vyavasthita' kema kahevAya ? paNa e saMsAramAM ja khUpAve noMdha ja karavAmAM nA Ave pachI bhAMjagaDa ja kyAM rahI ? mokSe javuM ne noMdha karavI, be sAthe bane nahIM ne ! have loko noMdha rAkhyA vagara rahe ? ane mokSe javuM hoya to noMdha choDI devI paDe, noMdhanI 'bUka kADhI nAkhavI paDe. amArA jevA bhoLA te noMdha lakhAI to lakhAI ne nA lakhAI to kaMI nahIM. e dukAna ja nA joIe. dukAnamAM amArA loko noMdhaya nA rAkhe. ne loko to noMdhavahI rAkhe che ne ? A loko to noMdhavahI bahu rAkhe. eka joTo caMdubhAI laI gayA, eka joTo caturabhAI laI gayA, te noMdha lakhe. ne sAMje pAchA copaDAmAM TapakAve, paNa noMdha to rAkhe. ame dukAnamAM eka copaDI rAkhIe, paNa mahIM lakhavAnuM bhUlI jaIe. eTale dhaMdho nA thAya. eTale noMdha e saMsAra dIpAve che, paNa e saMsAramAMthI nIkaLavA nA de. ane have amAre to noMdha karavAnI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM, copaDI jhAlavAnI ja jarUra nahIM. pena jhAlIne lakhavAnI zI jarUra ? te ame bhalA bhoLA sArA ke noMdha rAkhIe nahIM. ane mArI noMdhe ya koI rAkhatuM nathI. eTale ame chUTI jaIe, ukela AvI jAya. noMdha ja nahIMne, bhAMjagaDa nahIM ! vAta muddAnI nathI ? to tUTayA TekA saMsAratA ! praznakartA: mudAnI vAta che. paNa dAdA, A to evuM bane che ke saMsAranI aMdara noMdha rAkhavI ja joIe, evuM zikSaNa maLeluM. dAdAzrI : e zikSaNanI jarUra che. eTale saMsAramAM rahevuM hoya tyAM sudhI e zikSaNanI jarUra che. paNa mokSe javuM hoya to, 'noMdha na rAkhavI joIe' e zikSaNa maLavuM joIe. praznakartA : A saMsAramAM to kaheze "noMdha karo. ANe zuM karyuM,

Page #101
AptavANI-9 pelAe zuM karyuM, tamAre zuM karavAnuM che !' dAdAzrI : e noMdha rAkhe, to tame sAcA saMsArI kahevAva. ane jyAM sudhI noMdha che tyAM sudhI saMsAra tamane khasavA nA de. noMdha rAkho tyAM sudhI nahIM khasAya. noMdha nahIM rAkho eTale saMsAra Athamyo ! 151 praznakartA : saMsAramAM evuM jovA TevAyelA ke A bahu cokkasa mANasa che, ane A acokkasa joIne thAya ke A zuM thayuM ?! dAdAzrI : e acokasAI dekhAya che enuM nAma ja kahIe ke saMsAranA TekAo badhA paDI gayA. saMsAranA TekAo paDI jAya eTale saMsAra rahe ? saMsAranA TekA tUTayA eTale saMsAra rahe nahIM ne ! saMsAra paDI jAyane ! lokone vicAramAM AvI jAya ke A zuM thayuM ! paNa e acokasAI hoya tyAre mokSe javAya. nahIM to ema ne ema to enAM e ja kapaDAM ne enAM e ja veza ne Ama cokasAI, tema cokasAI, AnA paisAnI cokasAI, te emAM kaMI dahADo vaLato haze kaMI ? kazIye noMdha nA joIe. A to ApaNane kAle kahI gayo hoya to badhI noMdha hoya ApaNI pAse. have loko zuM kahe ke, 'A ja mokSe jaI zake, AvI cokasAI hoya to ja mokSe javAya.' ne huM kahuM chuM ke cokkasa nA hoya te ja mokSe jAya. dukAnanI nAdArI Ave ne ukela AvI jAya. jo mokSe javuM hoya to A nAdArI kADhavI paDaze. ahIM cokkasa rahevuM che ne tyAM mokSe javuM, e be bane nahIM. noMdha vagaranAM keTalA mANaso haze, A badhA mumukSuo, mokSanI icchAvALA che temAM ? praznakartA : mokSanI IcchA to zabdamAM ja rahI ! dAdAzrI : tethI A huM kahuM chuM ke adhyAtmamAM koNa AvyuM ? Atmasanmukha koNa thayo ? badhI IcchA choDIne hAtha chUTA karI nAkhyA hoya ne noMdha kazuMya nA hoya e Atmasanmukha thayo. saMsAramAM cokkasa rahevuM ne Atmasanmukha thavuM, be sAthe banI zake nahIM. tethI bhagavAne zuM kahyuM ke gherathI ahIM AgaLa Avato rahe, jo mokSe javuM hoya to ! zA AptavANI-9 152 sAru ? hA, nahIM to gharamAM rahevuM e cAle nahIM. eTale ApaNe ahIM AgaLa evuM che ke gharamAM rAkhIne karavAnuM che. eTale huM zuM karAvuM chuM ? noMdho baMdha rakhAvI do ApaNe. gharamAM raho kharAM, paNa noMdha vagaranAM ! kADhI nAkho e badhuM. A teno Dakho che. noMdha nA rAkhavI. e to tyAM saMsAramAM rAkhavAnuM hatuM te ahIM nathI rAkhavAnuM, ahIM rAkhavAnuM te tyAM nathI rAkhavAnuM. 'sahamata' nahIM, to praznakartA : mokSamAM javuM hoya to hoya to tyAM zuM karavAnuM ? A chUTayA ! noMdha karavAnI prakRti paDI gaI dAdAzrI : 'caMdubhAI'ne kahevAnuM ke 'have noMdha nA karazo.' praznakartA : paNa A prakRti je noMdha karavAnI che, tenuM zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : e prakRti kare to 'ApaNane' vAMdho nahIMne ! A to 'ApaNe' ane e, ema beu sahamata thaIne karIe chIe. 'ApaNI' sahamati UDI gaI, pachI e noMdha rahe ja nahIMne ! te kareya nahIM pachI, kaMTALI jAya. ApaNe nA karIe to sAmo noMdha kare ja nahIM. mArI dukAnamAMthI tame mAla laI jAva enI huM noMdha nA rAkhuM, to pachI tameya nA rAkho. tame ja kahezo, "e noMdha nathI rAkhatA, to huM zuM karavA rAkhuM ?' evo kAyado chene ! praznakartA : A noMdha choDavAnI tyAre sahaja bane che ke jyAre ApanI 'jalebI' cAkhavAnI maLe che tyAre. dAdAzrI : hA, nahIM to nA chUTe. praznakartA : nahIM to tyAM sudhI noMdha choDavI e to bahu kaThaNa paDe. dAdAzrI : are, mANasa to marI jAuM, paNa noMdha nahIM choDuM, pahADa uparathI paDatuM meluM, paNa noMdha nahIM choDuM', kaheze. kAraNa ke enA AdhAre huM jIvuM chuM evuM ene lAge che. ApaNe kahIe, 'khAvAnuM laI laIe

Page #102
154 AptavANI-9 ja nA hoya, ene saMsAranA loko zuM kahe ? pUrvagraha gayo kahevAya. noMdhane to 'prejayuDisa' kaho ke game te kaho, paNa e noMdha nukasAnakAraka che, noMdha e ja tAMto che. sahejeya du:kha kema hovuM joIe ? A du:kha jo kaMIka rahetuM hoya to AnuM ja, noMdhanuM ja rahe. sukhanA samudramAM rahIe, ne duHkha kema rahevuM joIe ? sukhano samudra nathI A 'jJAna' ? praznakartA : che dAdA, che. dAdAzrI : to ya paNa noMdha rAkho cho ne ? praznakartA : rahI jAya che, dAdA. AptavANI-9 153 to cAlaze ?" tyAre e kaheze, 'nA, khAvAnuM to joIe ne !' paNa toya ene noMdha to jIvADe. noMdha kazuMya choDe nahIM. 'toMdhatAsa'thI judAM "ApaNe'! ane haju A tAMto che, te A tAMtAne lIdhe haju noMdha rahe che. have Ama tAMto ApaNane nA dekhAto hoya, enI khabara nA paDe. paNa e noMdha kare ne, tyAre jANavuM ke tAMto che A. tamane kAle koI apamAna karI gayo hoya, to enI tame noMdha karo to huM jANuM ke tamane tAMto che. e tAMto bahu jokhamakAraka vastu che. noMdha bilakula nA rahevI joIe. A badhuM kahevAno bhAvArtha e ja ke ema ne ema kazuM bane nahIM, badhuM 'vyavasthita' hoya che. jyAM 'vyavasthita hoya tyAM noMdha zuM ? ane noMdha e tAMto che. praznakartA : abhyAsa nA hoya toya noMdha levAI ja jAya che. dAdAzrI : hA, levAI jAya. paNa te levAI jAya, tene ApaNe pachI bhUMsI nAkhavI ke A noMdha levAI gaI e bhUla thaI che. eTaluM ja bolIe ne, to chUTI jAya. ApaNe enAthI judA chIe evo abhiprAya hovo joIe. e noMdha levAya che enAthI ApaNe judA chIe evo abhiprAya rahevo joIe. to e matanA nathI ApaNe, e abhiprAya nathI ApaNo. nahIM to kazuM bolIe nahIM, to e matanA thaI jaIe. A to anAdi kALano abhyAsa, paNa A jJAna evuM che ke enAthI noMdha bilakuleya rahe nahIM A noMdho karIne to badhI upAdhi che baLI ! praznakartA : noMdhano ja abhyAsa karyo che ame. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa te abhyAsa choDavo ja paDaze ne ! atyAra sudhI to 'tame' 'caMdubhAI' hatA, paNa have 'zuddhAtmA' thayA. to pachI e badalAyuM tyAre Aya badhuM badalAyane ? noMdha to choDavI ja paDaze ne ? noMdha kyAM sudhI cAlaze ?! amane koI prakAranI noMdha nA hoya. ATalA badhAmAM, game te kazuM kahe, paNa amane noMdha hoya ja nahIM. pahelethIye noMdha dAdAzrI : have rAkhazo nahIM, ne rakhAI jAya to pachI bhUMsI nAkhavuM. bAkI tAMto eTale haThe caDhavuM. Agraha ! amaneya kahenArA kahI jAya ke nA kahI jAya ? praznakartA : paNa have zA upara tAMtA rAkhavAnA che ? dAdAzrI : hA, tAMtA rAkhyA te vaLyA nahIM. khAlI copaDI bharAya eTaluM ja paNa kazuM vaLe nahIM. badalAtAM karmotI noMdha zI ? koI tamane kaMI kahI jAya to tyAM AgaLa nyAya zuM kahe che ? e karmanA udaye tamane kahI gayo. have e udaya to eno pUro thaI gayo, ane tamAroya udaya pUro thaI gayo. have tamAre levAdevA nA rahI. have pharI che te tame ene tAMto rAkhIne juo cho, tyAre pelAM ja karmano udaya tame lAvo cho eTale guMcavADo Ubho karo cho. have pelo bIjAM ja karmamAM hoya che te vakhate. samajavA jevI vAta che ne ? paNa jhINI vAta che. Ano koI khulAso ja nA hoya ne, tAMto rAkhelA hoya te ? ane tAMtA rAkhanArA mANaso khulAso khoLe ! to eno kyAre pAra Ave ? eTale gaI kAle ApaNuM koI apamAna kare ne e mANasa Aje dekhIe to e navo ja lAgavo joIe ane e navo ja hoya che. paNa

Page #103
155 156 AptavANI-9 e nathI dekhAtuM to ApaNI bhUla thAya che. ApaNe bIjA rUpamAM joIe chIe. paNa e navo ja hoya che. eka karma patI gayuM eTale e bIjA karmamAM ja hoya. e bIjA karmamAM hoya ke enA e ja karmamAM hoya ? praznakartA : bIjA karmamAM hoya. dAdAzrI : ane ApaNe e ja karmamAM hoIe. te keTalo badho gaMdavADo kahevAya ?! tamAre koI phero bane kharI ke bhUla ?! noMdha rAkho ke ? praznakartA : pahelAM to noMdha levAnI Teva hatI, have nathI levAtI. dAdAzrI : nathI levAtI ne ? nakAmI copaDI bagADavI. loka to noMdhavahI rAkhe. Amane eka jaNa kahe ke 'tame prakRtinA nacAvyA nAco cho. tame bhamaraDA cho.' paNa toya amAre noMdha nahIM rAkhavAnI. te pachI huM ene vaDhyo. meM kahyuM, 'alyA, Amane kahevAtuM haze ? A kaI jAtano mANasa che te ?" paNa emaNe noMdha nahIM rAkhI. ame noMdha nA rAkhIe. ame enA moDhA para kahI daIe kharA, paNa pachI noMdha nA rAkhIe. noMdha rAkhavI e to bhayaMkara guno che. eTale koIne dAda nahIM, phariyAda nahIM. kazuM nahIM. koI apamAna karI gayo hoya to tamAre mane dAda-phariyAda karavAnI nA hoya. dAdaphariyAda nakAmI gaI. banyuM e barobara che, nyAya ja che ne ? prazna ja Ubho nahIM thato ne ? evuM A vijJAna che, cokhkhuM ! toMdha levAto AdhAra ! praznakartA : noMdha kharekhara kevI rIte levAya che, eno eka dAkhalo Apo ne ! dAdAzrI : ahIM rastAmAM tame jatAM ho ne koI tamane kahe ke, "A 'dAdA'nI pAchaLa nA pharo to cAle. vagara kAmanA tame bahu upAdhi karo cho." ane thoDuMghaNuM ekAda be zabdo evA bolyA ke ApaNane nA game evA, eTale pachI ApaNe noMdha laIe ke "Avo mANasa, nAlAyaka AptavANI-9 mANasa kyAMthI bhego thayo?' e noMdha laIe. agara to 'game tevuM hoya to paNa noMdha lIdhA vagara rahe nahIM. eTale 'nA game' to ya noMdha le ane game' to ya noMdha le. saheja paNa aruci utpanna thaI ke noMdha laI le. aruci thAya ne noMdha nA le to mokSa Ape. koIke ApaNane aruci karAvaDAvI ane noMdha nA le to mokSa thAya. e mokSane mATe pagathiyuM che. pAchuM e pagathiye e utare. je pagathiye caDhAya te ja pagathiye utare mANasa. abhiprAya ApavAno adhikAra(?)! praznakartA : have abhiprAya jema che tema kahIe koIpaNa jAtanA kharAba bhAva vagara, to temAM zuM khoTuM ? dAdAzrI : jema che tema kahI do, e adhikAra che tamane ? tamArI pAse e draSTi ja nathI. yathArtha draSTi vagara bolAya nahIM. abhiprAya zabda to Akho ya UDI gayo. abhiprAya to "pudgala, AtmA cha tattvo ja che, bIjo koI abhiprAya nahIM" - evuM hovuM joIe. bAkI abhiprAya eTale, kaMIka rAga-dveSa hoya to ja abhiprAya thAya. nahIM to abhiprAya thAya nahIM. gamatuM ke nA gamatuM hoya to abhiprAya thAya. ApaNane cA nA bhAvI hoya to ApaNe abhiprAya ApIe ke A cA sArI nathI. eTale cAne ApaNe vagovyA vagara nA rahIe. e to kayAM gayuM, paNa noMdha le. tethI pelA karanAra mANasane paNa ApaNe vagovyA vagara nA rahIe ane A cAnuM vagovaNuM kare tethI cA joDe zAdI thaI che te baMdha thaI jAya ne ? nA. mATe ochuM lapharuM e sAruM. dareka vastunAM lapharAM ochAM hoya te sArAM. ane hoya to AvuM nA nathI kahetA ame. kaMI lapharAnA savAla ame nathI rAkhatA. ame to A abhiprAyamAM ke A noMdha le, te nA kahIe chIe. tame khAva, pIvo, bhAve e bAsudI banAvajone ! bAsudI banAvIne khAva, tenI noMdha ApaNe nathI rAkhatA. ApaNe tyAM eno vAMdho nahIM. khAjo, pIjo ! ApaNuM vijJAna

Page #104
AptavANI-9 157 bIjo vAMdho UThAvatuM nathI. A noMdhanI jokhamadArI bahu ja che. paNa have noMdhanI jokhamadArI samaje to ne ! noMdha tyAM pudgala satA ja ! bAkI, noMdha karyA vagara rahe nahIM ne ! moTAmAM moTI ajJAnatAnI nizAnI kaI ? tyAre kahe, 'noMdha ' ApaNuM 'jJAna' maLyA pachI noMdha ekalI nA rahevI joIe, bIjuM badhuM rahe. noMdha ne pudgala be joDe ja UbhuM rahe. noMdha rahe tyAM sudhI pudgala ja rahe. tyAre sattA pudgalanI ja hoya. AtmAnI sattA nA hoya. eTalA mATe A noMdhanuM to amAre dasa-paMdara dahADe bolavuM ja paDe. cetava, cetava karavuM paDe. A noMdha rAkhavAthI to sattAye pudgalanI hoya, potAnI sattA nA hoya. bilakuleya sattA nA hoya. noMdha : abhiprAya ! praznakartA: noMdha ane abhiprAyamAM phera zuM che ? dAdAzrI : phera ne ! noMdhathI saMsAra Ubho thAya ane abhiprAyathI mana UbhuM thAya. noMdha Akho saMsAra Ubho karI de, Akhoya ! hato tevo ja karI nAkhe, lIle pAMdaDe karI nAkhe. praznakartA : paNa e noMdha karo eTale abhiprAya bese ne ? dAdAzrI : e barobara che paNa noMdha eTale abhiprAya nahIM. abhiprAya vastu to ApaNe noMdha lIdhA pachI ApIe. noMdha lIdhI ane te pachI sAruM-khoTuM game te abhiprAya ApIe, paNa noMdha laIe to ! paNa noMdha levI e ja moTAmAM moTo guno che. abhiprAyanuM to calAvI levAya. abhiprAyathI to mana UbhuM thayuM. teno pAcho ApaNe ne ApaNe nikAla karI nAkhavAno. paNa A noMdha to pharI saMsAra ja Ubho kare. noMdhano bhUlelo pAcho nA Ave. noMdhano bhUlo paDyo e pAcho Ave nahIM. praznakartA : A je noMdha levAya che te pahelAM levAya ne pachI rUpakamAM 158 AptavANI-9 bolIne eno abhiprAya Ape ? dAdAzrI : noMdha lIdhI eTale pachI e 'sAIDa'mAM cAlyuM. A dehanI 'sAIDa' cAlI badhI, pelI 'sAIDa' baMdha thaI gaI. tethI A pakSamAM thaI gayo. eTale pelo AtmA baMdha thaI gayo, AtmA e ghaDIe hoya nahIM. praznakartA : eTale noMdha le che te ghaDIe aMdara abhiprAya che ke.. dAdAzrI : abhiprAyano vAMdho nathI. abhiprAya eTaluM badhuM jokhama nathI. e mananuM baMdhAraNa bAMdhe eTaluM ja jokhama badhuM noMdhanuM. praznakartA : abhiprAya ane noMdhano taphAvata haju 'DITelamAM samajavo che. dAdAzrI : abhiprAya thoDoka rahyo haze to vAMdho nathI. noMdha to eka 'seMTa' paNa nA hovI joIe. noMdha eTale pudgala. noMdha to pudgala pakSI ja khAsa. noMdha le, eTale hato tevo ne tevo ja thaI jAya. jeNe 'jJAna' nA lIdhuM hoya ne lIdhuM hoya, emAM phera nahIM enuM nAma noMdha. praznakartA: paNa koIpaNa vastunI noMdha lo tyAre ja abhiprAya bese - dAdAzrI : abhiprAya to enI pAchaLa hoya ja. paNa abhiprAya haze to vakhate calAvI laIzuM. paNa noMdha nA hovI joIe. abhiprAya Apyo eTale, abhiprAyathI to khAlI mana ekaluM ja baMdhAya. A tame abhiprAya Apyo ke 'kaDhI khArI che' to mana baMdhAya. paNa noMdha lo to banAvanAra gunegAra Thare. praznakartA : noMdha eTale kaI rItanI noMdha levAya te ghaDIe ? dAdAzrI : "mane A kahI gayo, phalANuM kahI gayo, Ama kahI gayo, tema kahI gayo' evI badhI keTalA prakAranI noMdha ! A 'caMdubhAI" hoTalamAM gayA hatA tevI noMdha huM karuM to e kyo pakSa ? pudgala pakSa ! bahu jokhama che A noMdhamAM to.

Page #105
160 AptavANI-9 DaMkhIluM karI de. e DaMkha mArI gayo hoya ne, te pachI ApaNuM mana DaMkhIluM thAya. eTale koInIye noMdha rAkhazo nahIM. A badhuM to cAlyA ja kare ne ! tenI noMdha rAkhavI nahIM, karmanA udaye bicAro e bhaTakyA karato hoya. noMdha to AvatA bhavano saMsAra Ubho kare. noMdha mana upara caDhatI nathI ke noMdhathI mana baMdhAtuM nathI. noMdha to DaMkhIluM hoya che, DaMkha rahe enAthI. bahu noMdha bhegI thAya ne, to e DaMkha mAryA vagara rahe nahIM. e DaMkha mAre, badalo le. AptavANI-9 159 praznakartA : 'A kaDhI khArI cheevI noMdha kevI rIte levAya che ? dAdAzrI : noMdha eTale, "kaDhI khArI" bolIe chIe tenI sAthe karanAra koNa che tenA para badhuM jAya che. noMdha kartA jue ane abhiprAya vastu jue ! jAgRtinI jarUra, toMdhatI tahIM ! praznakartA : TUMkAmAM, jAgRti hoya to noMdhanI 'mazInarI' ja nA rahe. dAdAzrI : nA rahe. te jAgRti maMda tenI ja bhAMjagaDa ne ! jAgRti lAvavAnI, noMdha nahi rAkhavAnI, evuM jo e pote kare ne, to eTaluM jAgrata thAya ne ! nahIM to amAruM joIne karAya. A 'dAdAjI'ne 'phalANuM Ama, tema' kazuM koI kahI jAya toya moDhA para repha dekhAtI nathI. enuM kAraNa ? alyA, ahIM zAnuM 'rijhalTa' khoLo cho ? meM enI para lekha ja lakhyo nathI ne ! enA para kyAM 'ese' lakhuM ?! huM to noMdha ja nA rAkhuM ne ! evAM to badhAM keTalAya Ave ne jAya. chatAMya pAchuM ene moMDhe. je boluM chuM evuM huM nathI mAnato. pAcho che te zuddhAtmA ! nirdoSa !!. bAhya nirdoSa ! AMtarika zuddhAtmA !!! evI draSTithI ame moDhe bolIe. ane Ama to amArI e pATIdAriyA bhASA, bhASA to jAya nahIM ne ! paNa noMdha rAkhavAnI nahIM. eTale vAta ja samajavAnI che. vadhAre nukasAna karatuM hoya to A noMdha. ane vaNika lokone to khAsa, e eka copaDI rAkhe ja. ane A baheno hala rAkhe AvaDI copaDI. 'pappAjI Ama kahI gayA ne mammI AvuM kahetAM hatAM.' eTale dareka mANasa noMdha to rAkhe ja che, choDatA nathI. jJAna" letAM pahelAM je noMdhanI copaDI hatI, noMdhavahI hatI, te haju ema ne ema rahevA dIdhI che. bIjuM badhuM ApI dIdhuM ! noMdha, tyAM DaMkhIluM mata ! have keTalAkane loko mATe abhiprAya nathI hoto paNa tyAre e noMdha vadhAre rAkhe, khAlI noMdha rAkhe che. e noMdhathI zuM thAya ? ke ApaNA manane praznakartA : noMdha lenAra koNa ? ane abhiprAya ApanAra koNa ? dAdAzrI : e beu ahaMkAra ! praznakartA : buddhi noMdha le, evuM kharuM ? dAdAzrI : buddhine kazuM levAdevA nahIM. levA-devAno dhaMdho ja nahIM ne ! levAdevAno dhaMdho ja ahaMkArano. "jJAtI'tuM sarvAga darzana A noMdha levI e bahu judI vastu che. A je huM kahuM chuM e vAta Ama mArI samajamAM Ave paNa te Ama dekhADavuM jarA agharuM lAge. keTalAkane huM kahuMye kharo ke A noMdha rAkhazo nahIM, ne e samajI jAya pAchA ke AnI noMdha rAkhI tenI bhAMjagaDa thaI. ame kazI noMdha nA rAkhIe. A badhI avasthAo UbhI thAya, paNa noMdha nA rAkhIe. praznakartA : Apa zuM juo te vakhate ? dAdAzrI : ame 'hola phoTogrAphI' laIe. A ekalo ja doDato hato evI noMdha nA rAkhIe. praznakartA : e 'hola phoTogrAphI'mAM e doDato to hoya ja ne ? dAdAzrI : e mahIM hoya ja. paNa Ama 'hola phoTogrAphI' laIe.

Page #106
AptavANI-9 161 vItarAgatAtI vATe.... have noMdha nA kare to jagatamAM vItarAga thaI gayo. noMdha nA kare enuM nAma vItarAga ! te ApaNe evuM nathI kahetA ke "tuM saMpUrNa noMdha nA karIza.' paNa thoDI ghaNI ochI karIza toya bahu thaI gayuM, eTale pachI ApaNane ema mAlama paDe ke vItarAga thaI gayo lAge che. enA uparathI ApaNe ema mAnIe ke kaMIka vItarAga dazA lAge che. chatAM 'vItarAga' evuM kharekhara bolAya nahIM. have A vAto sAMbhaLa sAMbhaLa karavAthI badhuM enI meLe chUTI jAya. Ane mATe kaMI kriyA nathI karavAnI ke be upavAsa karajo ke Ama ke tema karajo. vAtane samajavAnI ja jarUra che. [3] komanasensa : velDIMga komanasensa'nI kacAza ! A vANI rAga-dveSa vagaranI che. vItarAga vANI che. A vANI sAMbhaLe ane jo dhAraNa kare to tenuM kalyANa ja thaI jAya. A vANI jo dhAraNa kare ne to badho roga julAba vATe nIkaLI jAya ! avaguNonAM je paramANu che ne, e badhAM julAba vATe nIkaLI jAya ! badhI vAtano huM sAra kahuM chuM, ane A badho Akho arka ja che. amArA anubhavano A badho nicoDa che. nahIM to pustakamAM to lakhAtuM haze ke Aje 'komanasensa' koIne che ja nahIM ! nahIM to AvuM vAMcIne tarata loka ahIM AgaLa "eplAya" karavA Ave ke "sAheba, mArAmAM komanasensa to che." evuM vakhate koI Ave ne, to huM ene kahyuM ke, "heMDa joIe, tAre ghera AvuM, paMdara dahADA rahuM !" A "komanasensa'vALA AvyA ! A AvuM kahIe nahIM ne, to mANasa potAnI jAtane zuM ye mAnI besIne phare che ke ApaNA jevo to koI che ja nahIM. evarI hera eplIkebala' 'komanasensa eTale zuM ? ke "evarI hera eplIkebala,

Page #107
164 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : bemAMthI konAmAM ochI hoya e zI khabara paDe ? dAdAzrI : e to khabara paDe ne, ke bemAMthI koNa pahelo matabheda pADe che ? eTale 'sensa' to joIze ne ! AptavANI-9 163 thIareTikala ejha vela ejha prekTikala'! A komanasensa' to ame koInAmAM joI ja nathI. 'komanasensa' eTale e evI cAvI che ke evarI hera eplIkebala' hoya, enAthI game tevA kATa caDhelAM tALAM ughaDI jAya. nahIM to A to sArAM, navAM tALAM hau vasAI jAya che ! naThArAmAM naThArA mANasanuM tALuM ApaNAthI UghaDe to jANavuM ke ApaNI pAse 'komanasensache. nahIM to 'komanasensa' vagaranI badhI vAto kare che, emAM kazuMya potAnI samajaNa nathI. 'komanasensa'vALo mANasa joyelo ? koI mANasa atyAra sudhI meM komanasensa'vALo joyo ja nathI. te moTA moTA 'kalekTara' mane pUche che ke, "komanasensa tame koInAmAM joI ja nathI !' tyAre mAre kahevuM paDe che ke, "komanasensa' kyAMthI lAve ? bAIDI joDe vaDhavADa to thAya che, ne tuM 'komanasensa' kyAMthI laIne Avyo ? "komanasensa'vALAne bAIDI joDe vaDhavADa thatI haze ? jenI joDe rahevAnuM che, jenI joDe khAvAnuM che, jenI joDe pIvAnuM che, jenI joDe Tebala para jamavA besavAnuM che, tenI joDe vaDhavADa thatI haze ? enuM nAma "komanasensakahevAya ? AvI komanasensa' kyAMthI laI AvyA ? A to khoTA ghumarATa manamAM laIne jagata AkhuM pharyA kare che. 'huM kaMIka jANuM chuM !" alyA zuM jANyuM te ? komanasensa' to jANI nathI haju, to bIjuM zuM jANuM ? A to karmanA udayathI phare che. jenAthI AkhI duniyA DarI jAya toya e bAIDI joDe kacakaca karyA vagara rahyo ja nA hoya ne ! alyA, bAIDI joDe kacakaca zuM karavA kare che ? bAra varSamAM be cAra vakhata to kacakaca karato ja hoya ne ? praznakartA : are, roja kacakaca hoya ! dAdAzrI : roja ?! to to ene mANasa ja kema karIne kahevAya ? ane pachI kahe che, "amArAmAM sensa che.' alyA, paNa 'sensa kyAM hatI ? amatho zuM karavA bUmAbUma kare che te ?! 'sensa' hota to vaha joDe bhAMjagaDa paData zuM karavA ? vahu joDe matabheda paDe che, eTale ApaNe nA samajIe ke kaMIka 'sensa' ochI haze. komanasensavALo mANasa 'evarI hera eDajasTebala hoya. koI gALa bhAMDe tenI joDeya 'eDajasTa thaIne kaheze. "Avo. Avo, beso ne ! kazo vAMdho nahIM." eTale, komanasensa' joIze. ane A to 'akkala vagaranA cho' evuM kahyuM ke moTuM-tobaro caDhI jAya. alyA, "komanasensa' nathI ? tAro tobaro zuM karavA caDhI gayo AmAM ?! "akkalavALo chuM" evuM tArI jAtane mAnI beTho che tuM ? jo akkalanA kothaLA ! A moTA akkalanA bAradAna AvyA !! vecavA jaIe to cAra AnAya nA Ave. ane nakAmo taDapaDa taDapaDa karyA kare. akkalavALo to 'evarI hera eplIkebala'vALo hoya. A kALamAM to 'komanasensa'nI muzkelI paDI che. 'komanasensa'no artha barobara karelo che? A pahelAMno artha haze ke navo artha haze ? praznakartA: maulika, navo ja artha che. dAdAzrI : maulika che, nahIM ? pahelAM koIe karelo nahIM ? A komanasensa'no artha ame kahyo ne, ke "evarI hera eplIkebala, thIareTikala ejha vela ejha prekiTakala', e sAMbhaLIne loka bahu khuza thAya che. 'komanasensano bahu suMdara artha karyo' kahe che. tyAre meM kahyuM, 'e ja ame meTrika nApAsa thayAnI nizAnI che ne (!) "komanasensa'nuM pramANa ! ane tame to "sI.e." thayelA cho ne ! paNa hajI tamAre to keTalA badhA bhAga vadhavA paDaze. sI.e.nA bhAga, pachI bIbInA bhAga, badhuM AvaDavuM joIze ne ? nahIM to bIbI to tela kADhI nAkhaze. ApaNane nA AvaDe tethI ne? AvaDatuM hoya to kaMI tela nA kADhe ! ane bIbI, e kaMI tela kADhavA nathI AvI. e to ghara mAMDavA AvI che. paNa pachI eka pArTI'

Page #108
AptavANI-9 165 namI paDe eTale kUca kUca karyA kare. hA, AvaData nA dIThI eTale ! A AjanI chokarIo zuM kahe che ? huM pUchuM chuM ke, 'bena, A chokarAo mATe tamAro zo abhiprAya che ?" tyAre e kahe che, "e to babucaka che." A zarama bharelI vAta nA kahevAya, A chokarIo AvuM bole te ?! kAraNa ke kudaratI rIta evI hoya che ke dasa varSano chokaro hoya ne dasa varSanI chokarI hoya, paNa dasa varSanI chokarImAM paMdara varSanA chokarA jeTaluM vadhAre jJAna hoya che, eTaluM DahApaNa hoya. kahevAya dasa varSanI, paNa enAmAM agamacetI hoya che. eTale strIone Ama AgaLa paDatuM jJAna, vahIvaTa, badhuM ya vadhAre hoya che. vyavahArukatA vidhAtA eka baIne meM pUchyuM ke, "kema dhaNI joDe tAre phAvatuM nathI ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'dAdAjI, akkala to eTalI badhI che ke na pUcho vAta !' tyAre meM kahyuM ke, 'tAre sAruM, dhaNI akkalavALo hoya te to !' tyAre e kahe che, 'paNa vyavahArukatA ja nathI.' eTale zuM kahe che ke 'komanasensa' nathI, te vAtavAtamAM jhaghaDA thaI jAya. pachI e baIe mane kahyuM ke, "komanasensa' nathI, dAdAjI. zuM karuM ? tyAre meM kahyuM, 'badhuM samajI gayo. have tuM bIjI vAta ja nA karIza.' A to meLa paDe ja nahIM ne ! thoDIghaNI to 'komanasensa joIe ke nA joIe mANasane ? vyavahArukatA to hovI joIe ne ? eTale pachI benone huM zuM kahuM chuM ke, 'bena, dhaNI Avo nonasensa maLI Ave to ApaNI zI dazA thAya ? tane AvuM nonasensa jIvana jIvavAnuM game kharuM ? chatAM prArabdha je lakhelo hoya te choDe nahIM ne ApaNuM dhAryuM thAya nahIM, evuM A jagata che ! tAre evo nonasensa dhaNI maLe to mane kahI deje ke mane Avo maLyo che. to tarata ja huM ene rIpera karI ApIza ane tane cAvI ApI daIza.' te pachI enuM rAge pADI ApuM. DAuta' ahaMkAra, to "DiliMga' 'besTa' ! eTale 'komanasensa'nA hoya ne, tene to vahu joDe eka kalAkeya 166 AptavANI-9 meLApa nA thAya. 'komanasensa' nathI tethI bhAMjagaDa thAya ne ! ene paiNAvIe to zI dazA thAya ? Aje enI 'vAIpha' AvI, rAte bhegAM thayAM, eka kalAkamAM to beu chUTAM. 'hAu Tu Dila' e ja paheluM nA AvaDe. 'bIgInIMga" kema karavI teya nA AvaDe. kaLA ke kazuM joIe ke nA joIe vaLI ? praznakartA: joIe ja ne ! te vagara cAle ja nahIM. dAdAzrI : dhaNI che te komanasensa'vALo joIe ne ? A to koIka dahADo 'vAIpha'nI bhUla thaI, to enI joDe jhaghaDo karavA besI jAya ! alyA, jhaghaDo karavA mATe bhUla nathI thaI ! koI komanasensavALA hoya te to pAnavALAnI joDeya samajIne nikAla karI lAve. laDhanAro mANasa koNa hoya ? jene 'sensa' nA hoya e mANasa jyAM ne tyAM A badhuM bagADI nAkhe. kyA saMjogomAM bicArAe bhUla karI haze e jANyA vagara ApaNe laDhamalaDhA karIe, e kAmamAM lAge kharuM ? praznakartA : nA lAge. nukasAna kare. dAdAzrI : eTale jene "komanasensa' nA hoya e laDhe. ane laDhe eTale thaI rahyuM, ene ne tamAre tUTI gayuM. eTale potAnA ahaMkArane eTalo badho 'DAuna' lejo ke badhAMnI joDe bhaLI zakAya. have ahaMkArane kaMI AMTA hoya che ke Ama pheravIne ene 'DAuna' karAya ?! eTale samajaNanuM hovuM joIe ke aNasamajaNanuM hovuM joIe ? ane samajaNano ahaMkAra thayelo hoya teno ya vAMdho nathI. paNa A to aNasamajaNano ahaMkAra. e kaI jAtanuM kahevAya ? milatasAra'thI vadhe "komanasensa' ! ethI huM kahuM chuM ne, ke A badhAmAM joDe besIe to lokono prema ApaNI upara utpanna thAya. ane bIjI vAtacIto cAle, potapotAnI vAto kare, emAM vAtamAMthI pakaDI laIe to 'komanasensa' vadhe ApaNI. badhAMya mANasomAM bhaLIne cAlavAthI 'komanasensa' vadhe.

Page #109
AptavANI-9 167 praznakartA : badhAM joDe haLImaLIne rahevuM ema Ape kahyuM ne, paNa mane to emAM tiraskAra jevuM rahe che. dAdAzrI : A tiraskAra che tethI AvuM thaI gayuM che ne ! mATe have tiraskAra kADhI ane badhAMnI joDe haLImaLIne cAlo to mahIM 'komanasensa' vadhe. tiraskAra to gAyobheMsonoya nA karAya, to A manuSyanI joDe kema karAya ? ane chata nathI kazIya ! tamAre chata hoya ne tiraskAra karatA hoya to ThIka che, ke 'bhaI, bahu chatavALA mANasa che te tiraskAra kare !" paNa A to chata paNa nathI. chata kone kahevAya ? ke vahu joDe paiNe, paNa AkhI jiMdagI sudhImAM thoDIghaNI dhamAla thAya, paNa roja dhamAla nA thAya. enuM nAma chata kahevAya. ne A chata vagarano hoya te paiNe ane pelI vahu tyAM AgaLa AvI ane vahu Ama karIne pelI bAju beThAM, eTale tALuM zI rIte ughADavuM e AvaDe nahIM. to pelI vahunuM zuM thAya ? - sUra meLavatAM meLavatAM... A to vahu joDe vaDhavADa thaI hoya to pachI pAMca dahADA sudhI bole nahIM. jarAka amathI thoDI kaMI bhAMjagaDa paDI. to nA bole. have tyAM bIjuM kazuM ene AvaDe nahIM, eTale zI rIte tALuM ughADe ? ema ne ema tALuM to kaTAyA kare. ane pelA miyAMbhAI to bIbInAM tALAM tarata kholI nAkhe. 'komanasensa' eTale sUra maLato Ave. praznakartA H sUra maLato Ave eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : e amArA jevI ja rIta hoya. ame je rIte pakaDatA hoIe evI amArI najIkanI rIta pramANe varte. miyAMbhAI zuM kaheze ? bIbI joDe bhAMjagaDa huM pADuM ja nahIM ne ! e bhAMjagaDa pADe, paNa huM bhAMjagaDa nA pADuM." 'komanasensa'vALo hoya ane pachI ema nA hoya ke 'mAre AvuM thayuM tyAM AgaLa have zuM karavuM ?" evuM jo 'eplAya" nA thatuM hoya to e "komanasensa' ja nhoya. 168 AptavANI-9 e athaDAmaNa TALe ! praznakartA: 'komanasensa'vALo hoya eTale badhe Ukela karI nAkhe ne ? dAdAzrI : 'komanasensa'vALo hoya e to badhA bahu jAtanA ukela lAve, vyavahAranI badhI gUMco kADhI nAkhe. praznakartA : ene athaDAmaNa thAya ? dAdAzrI : athaDAmaNa ochI thAya. athaDAmaNa nahIM karavA denArI vastu hoya to 'komanasensa' ja ! praznakartA : eTale athaDAmaNa thAya tyAM 'komanasensa' ja nA kahevAya. dAdAzrI : evuM nahIM, paNa e 'komanasensa' ochI kahevAya. praznakartA : paNa jJAnI sivAya athaDAyA vagara to koNa rahe ? dAdAzrI : paNa eTale 'komanasensa' hoyane, to athaDAya nahIM. 'komanasensa'vALo to tarata meLavI de, avaLuM thayuM hoya toya pheravI nAkhe. tarata ja, ene kazI vAra nA lAge. enuM nAma ja "komanasensa" ne ! "evarI hera eplIkebala'! praznakartA : paNa jyAM rAga-dveSa Ave tyAM 'komanasensa' UDI jAya ne ? dAdAzrI : 'komanasensa' e anubhavanI vAta che. e rAga-dveSane lAgatI vaLagatI nathI. saMsArano, vyavahArano anubhava hoya ne, te komanasensa'! to rokAya svachaMda ! praznakartA: vyavahAranA prasaMgamAM jyAM 'DisIzana" levAnuM hoya, tyAM pelI vyavahArika sujha kAma lAge ke nahIM ?

Page #110
AptavANI-9 169 dAdAzrI : hA, sUjha ja kAma lAge. paNa sUjha nA hoya to kyAMthI lAve ? hA, nahIM to pachI potAno vizvAsu hoya tene pUchIne kAma karavuM. pUchIne kAma karIe enA jevuM ekeya nahIM, A duniyAmAM ! pUchIne kare ke, "sAheba, pezAba karavA jAuM ?" tyAre e kahe, 'jAva.' pachI eno guno nahIM ne ! pachI tyAM bhale ne, daza miniTa bIDIo pIdhI. paNa ema ne ema pUchyA vagara jAya tyAre pakaDe ene. "kema bIDI pIvA gayo hato" kaheze. mATe pUchIne jAva. praznakartA: pUchIne javAmAM svacchaMda nAmano bhAga Akho tUTI jAya ne? dAdAzrI : hA, eTalA mATe ja, svaccheda kADhavA mATe ja A pUchIne karavAnuM ne ! tethI ja guru karavA mATe kaheluMne ! potAnA DahApaNe ja cAlavAnuM nahIMne ! ane guru kahe e soLa AnI. ApaNe A bhAIne kahIe ke "A bAju doDa.' e pachI pUchavA nA rahe. enuM nAma svaraccheda gayo kahevAya. ane pUchavA jAya bIjo koIkane ke A dAdA kahe che e bAju doDuM ke nA doDuM ?" e svachaMda kahevAya. hA, vyavahArika bAbatamAM to mane kaMI pUchavAnI jarUra nathI. emAM ApaNe 'phAdhara'pUchIe, ke bIjAM koI ApaNAthI moTI uMmaranAM hoya, anubhavI hoya ene puchIe. vyavahArika bAbatomAM vyavahArika mANaso badhA moTI uMmaranA hoya ne, e badhI samajaNa pADe. praznakartA : paNa AvA vyavahAramAM 'TAIma' to 'komanasensa' ja 'eplIkebala' thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa 'komanasensa' lAge kyAMthI te ? e to ApaNA pustako vAMcavAca kare to evI sUjha Ave pachI. bAkI, "komanasensa' kyAMthI lAve ? e kaMI reDhiyALa cIja che ? saraLatAthI vadhe "komanasensa' ! praznakartA: saraLatAthIye "komanasensa vadhe ne ? 170 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : hA, bahu vadhe. saraLatAthI chetarAya kharo, paNa komanasensa' bahu vadhe. paisA vadhAre laIne ApaNane chetarI jAya, paNa enA badalAmAM ApaNane 'komanasensa' vadhe. A duniyAmAM badalA sivAya koI cIja thatI nathI. koIne koI badalo apAI jAya. praznakartA paNa 'komanasensa' eTale to 'evarI hera eplIkebala hoya ne ? to pachI chetarAya kevI rIte jAya ? dAdAzrI : saraLatA che tethI chetarAya ne ! be-traNa jagyAe nA chetarAya, paNa eka-be jagyAe chetarAya pAcho. paNa chetarAya te ghaDIe ene "komanasensa' khIle, ane samaja paDe ke AvA saMjogomAM chetarAI javAya che, eTale ene 'komanasensa' vadhatI jAya. "solyuzana' "komatasensa'thI ! 'komanasensa' to bahu moTI vastu che. eka sAhebane eka mANasa AvIne game tevuM kahevA mAMDyo. te sAhebane 'komanasensa'thI jarAya asara nA thaI. jo "komanasensa' hatI to ! eTale 'komanasensano dAkhalo ApaNane jovA maLe ke A sAhebe 'komanasensa' vAparI. bIjo mANasa to tyAM AgaLa 'Diskareja' ja thaI jAya ne, enI meLe ja ! jabarajasta 'Diprezana' AvI jAya. paNa meM to emanAmAM Diprezana joyuM nathI. huM e ja joyA karato hato ke Diprezana Ave che ke nahIM ? pelo mANasa zuMye kahI gayo toya 'Diprezana" nA AvyuM. eTale A badhAne zuM kahuM chuM ? ke "komanasensathI prazno ukelo. koI mANasa game evuM bolIne Ubho raheze, enA magaja upara AdhAra rAkhe che ne ! ane kaMIka tamAruM puNya (!) haze tyAre ja bole ne ! nahIM to puNya (!) vagara koI bolatuM haze ? ghATa, tyAM pUrNatA nahIM ! praznakartA: jene 'komanasensa' hoya ene potAne kazuM nA thAya paNa enA nimitte sAmAne duHkha thAya ?

Page #111
AptavANI-9 171 dAdAzrI : e to thAya ne ! sAmevALo nabaLo hoya to du:kha thAya. A duniyAmAM nabaLA mANasane duHkha thAya. jeTalI nabaLAI eTaluM duHkha ene. nabaLAne duHkha thAya emAM baLavAna zuM kare ? koI rAkSasa jevo, zarIre bAMdho evo hoya, evo mANasa jato hoya, tene dekhIne loko bhaDakIne nAsI jAya, temAM pelo zuM kare ? pelAno zo guno ? praznakartA : emAM potAnuM vartana, vANI evAM hoya ke sAmAne duHkha nA thAya, rAjI rAkhI badhuM kAma karAvI de, evI ene 'giphaTa' hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : e badhuM hoya, paNa mULa e svArthamaya pariNAma hoya che te nahIM sArAM. e 'kampalITa komanasensa' nA Ave. sahejeya ghATa hoya ne, tyAM 'komanasensapUrI nA hoya. ghATa nA hoya tyAre kharuM. pachI sAmAne rAjI rAkhe te ghATa vagaranuM rAjI rAkhe, ene duHkha nA thAya eTalA mATe, bAkI, jagata to potAnA ghATane mATe rAjI rAkhe eTale 'komanasensa' pUrI thAya nahIM enI. kAraNa ke ghATamAM vaparAI e ! enAthI sUjha judI ! praznakartA : 'komanasensa' eTale kaMIka vyavahArika kAma hoya te ochA samayamAM ne 'spIDI' karI lAve, ane koInI sAthe athaDAmaNa TALI nAkhe ? 172 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : nA. e sUjha kahevAya. sUjha ane buddhi beu hoya keTalAkane. ane pAchI buddhi emane hoya ke nirNaya paNa jhaTa karI nAkhe. sujhane darzana kahe che ane buddhine jJAna kahe che. paNa A viparIta jJAna ne darzana. eTale saMsArika jJAna ne darzana, mithyAjJAna ne mithyAdarzana ! komanasensa' sarvAgI !! praznakartA : vyavahArukatA ene ja kahe ne ke vyavahAramAM je mANasa eksaparTa hoya ? dAdAzrI : hA, loko e ja kahe ne ! ene loka 'eksaparTa' kahe. paNa 'eksaparTa' karatAM ya vyavahArukatA vadhI jAya. vyavahArukatA eTale komanasensa'. 'komanasensa' sarvAgI hoya ane A che te "eksaparTa e 'vana sAIDaDa' hoya. paNa emAM e 'eksaparTa hoya. A komanasensavALo 'eksaparTa' nA hoya. eka 'sAIDamAM eksaparTa thavA jAya to bIjI 'sAIDa baMdha thaI jAya. praznakartA: 'eksaparTa' 'limiTeDa phIlDa'mAM ja thAya. dAdAzrI : amuka 'limiTeDa phIlDa'mAM ja. bIje badhe kAcuM paDI jAya. praznakartA: 'komanasensa'nI rIte vyavahArane jue eTale ene badhI gaNatarI hoya. ane jJAnanI rIte jue to pote koIne kartA nA jue, 'vyavasthita'ne tAbe jue. to e baMnemAM vyavahAramAM 'solyuzana' lAvavAmAM zuM phera paDe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNA jJAnanuM 'solyuzana' judI jAtanuM. praznakartA : baMnemAM UMcu 'solyuzana kyuM ? dAdAzrI : 'komanasensa'nuM. bAkI, jJAnanuM 'solyuzana' to eTaluM hoya ja nahIM ne ! praznakartA : jJAnanuM 'solyuzana' Ave to potAne baLatarA baMdha thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : vyavahArika kAma jaladI jhapATAbaMdha karI lAve ne, ene sUjha vadhAre kahevAya. ene sUjhavALo che ema kahevAya. 'komanasensa' eTale 'evarIvheara eplIkebala', je tALAM UghaDatAM nA hoya tenuM tALuM UghADI Ape. praznakartA : koI nirNaya karavAno hoya to keTalAka gUMcAyA kare. ane keTalAka Ama phaTAphaTa tarata 'DisIzana" le, e sUjha kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. A nirNaya levo e buddhi kahevAya. ane "spIDI" kAma karI nAkhe, kalAkanuM kAma pA kalAkamAM, to e sUjha kahevAya. praznakartA : ene vyavahArukatA kahevAya ?

Page #112
173 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : baLatarA baMdha thaI jAya, paNa bahAranuM vyavahAranuM kAma nA thAya ne ! te ApaNA badhAya 'mahAtmA'one vyavahAramAM jJAna kAma nA Ave. emane 'komanasensa' che ja nahIM ne ! vahune paiNyA, te enI joDe nikAla kema karavI te nA AvaDe. A sAdhu AcAryone paiNAvIe to trIje dahADe nAsI jAya ! zAthI nAsI jAya ? e lAInanuM jANatAM ja nathI ke have kemano Ano ukela lAvavo ! praznakartA: "komanasensa'vALAne A jJAnano lAbha jevo thavo joIe evo nA thAya ne ? kAraNa ke enI draSTi A 'vyavahAra' taraphanI hoya. dAdAzrI : e "komanasensa' nA gaNAya. e to badhuM-svArthamaya pariNAma badhAM, 'vana sAIDeDa' hoya. komanasensa to 'evarI herA eplIkebala', 360 DigrInuM hoya. paNa 'eksaparTa' koI bAbatamAM nA hoya. praznakartA : paNa 'eksaparTa' to vyavahArikatAmAM jAya.. dAdAzrI : 'eksaparTa' che te amuka ja vyavahAramAM paDelA hoya. e bAbatamAM ja 'eksaparTa' thayelA hoya, bIjI bAbatamAM nA hoya. e bIjI bAbatamAM to 'jhIro' hoya. jyAre pelo 'jhIro' nA hoya koI bAbatamAM. praznakartA : dAdA, A 'komanasensa' ane 'jJAna', e bene kaMI levAdevA kharI ? dAdAzrI : jJAnane eTaluM ja levAdevA ke niHsvArthapaNuM hoya jJAna" ! "jJAna" je pAmavAnA hoya te niHsvArthapaNI upara hoya. te komanasensa' khIlatI jAya ane jJAneya joDe joDe khIlatuM jAya. bAkI 'komanasensane ane jJAnane kazuM levAdevA nathI. 'jJAna' to tamane badhAne che ja ne ! kyAM nathI ? paNa ni:svArthapaNAne laIne 'komanasensa' ane jJAna beu khIlatAM jAya. ane svArthI hoya tene "komanasensa' 'vana sAIDaDa' thaI jAya, ane jJAna bilakuleya khIle nahIM. praznakartA : paNa svArtha hoya ene vyavahArukatA khIle ne ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAra khIle, paNa 'vana sAIDaDa," amuka ja 174 AptavANI-9 'sAIDa'mAM hoya. 'vana sAIDaDa'ne 'komanasensa' gaNAtI nathI. 'komanasensa' eTale "evarIvhera eplIkebala ! tethI meM aMgrejI zabda eno bIjo mUkyo ke "evarIvheara eplIkebala," ke jethI loka emanI bhASAmAM samajI nA jAya. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, ene rAga-dveSa to aMdara hoya ke nA ye hoya, evuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : niHsvArtha upara jAya ne, to rAga-dveSa ochA thatA jAya. badhuM svArthIne ja rAga-dveSa che. praznakartA : ane "komanasensa'vALAne rAga-dveSa? dAdAzrI : ene rAga-dveSa ochA thatA jAya dahADe dahADe, jJAna caDhatuM jAya, 'komanasensa' khIlatI jAya, badhuM ya caDhatuM jAya. praznakartA : athaDAmaNo thAya emAMthI 'komanasensa' khIle ? emAMthI tAraNa kADhatAM AvaDatuM hoya to ? dAdAzrI : ene peluM niHsvArthane laIne tarata tAraNa nIkaLI ja jAya. svArthIne to khabara ja nA paDe. evA evA prasaMgo bane paNa prasaMgo 'phrI opha kosTa' jatA rahe. prasaMgo badhA bahu bane che, paNa bhUlI jAya AkhuM jagata. jyAre peluM to badhuM tAraNa nIkaLI ja jAya. praznakartA : tAraNa nIkaLI ja jAya ? ene kazuM karavuM nA paDe ? dAdAzrI : nA, kazuM nahIM. enI meLe ja tAraNa nIkaLI jAya. ane peluM tyAM tAraNa kADhI nAkhe eTale jJAna pragaTa thAya. praznakartA : jJAnamAM jema peluM dekhAtuM hoya ke A "rIyala', A rIleTiva', kartA koNa, A koNa, evuM badhuM dekhAya aMdara. jyAre 'komanasensa'vALAne bIjuM kaMIka 'lAITa' haze ne ? dAdAzrI : "komanasensa'vALA to dareka tALAM je nA UghaDatAM hoya te UghADI Ape.

Page #113
AptavANI-9 175 praznakartA : kyA "solyuzanathI, kaI cAvIothI khUle e ? dAdAzrI : nahIM, e svAbhAvika ene, e anubhavajanya hoya. dareka prasaMgomAMthI anubhavajanya jJAna prApta thayuM hoya, e cAvIo hoya. prasaMgomAMthI anubhavajanya je vastu hoya ne, te cAvIonA AdhAre badhuM kAma kare che. ane 'eksaparTa' hoya tyAM e chetarAya, eya chetarAya. praznakartA : paNa 'komanasensa'vALo gUMcAya nahIM ne ? dAdAzrI : gUMcAya nahIM, paNa chetarAya kharo. chetarAIne paNa pote e gUMca kADhI nAkhe. A vakIlo 'eksaparTa' hoya, bIjA jAtajAtanA 'eksaparTa' hoya. potAnI lAInamAM e 'eksaparTa' hoya ne, paNa e chetarAI jAya. jeTalo vadhAre vizvAsu hoya eTalI 'komanasensa' vadhAre khIle chetarAya vadhAre eTale komanasensa vadhI jAya, niHsvArthapaNuM vadhatuM jAya. praznakartA : eka rIte to tame kaho cho ke "komanasensa'vALo koI jagyAe gUMcAya nahIM. to pAcho chetarAya kharo ? 176 AptavANI-9 have enI joDe ApaNe sAMdho meLavavo hoya, to have Ama jo enI najadIka jAya sAMdho meLavavA to pelo bagaDe. eTale enAthI dUra rahIne enI joDe kAma le ? dAdAzrI : e koI kaLA kare, bIjI kaLAthI kAma le. praznakartA : to ene "komanasensa' kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, eya "komanasensa'mAM gaNAya ne ! praznakartA: to dAdA, e hisAbe tamAruM 'komanasensa' bahu 'Topa' para che. dAdAzrI : amArI A judI jAtanI "komanasensa' kahevAya. A to badhA niHsvArthapaNe anubhava ja joyelA, anubhava badhA dekhAya. A to svArthane laIne anubhava dekhAtA nathI. anaMta avatArathI strI paiNe che, paNa strIno moha jAya che lokone ? ane mAreya bahu khAya che. praznakartA : paNa emAMthI tAraNa nIkaLe nahIM. tAraNa nA kADhe ? dAdAzrI : tAraNa nA kADhe. svArthathI e badhuM tAraNa nA nIkaLe. A sAdhu, AcAryo ke jemaNe bhAvanA karelI hoya che ne, ke 'have paiNavuM ja nathI.' te to tAraNa kADheluM tene lIdhe. dAdAzrI : e to 'komanasensa' khIlI gayA pachI nA gUMcAya. khIlatI vakhate to gUMcAya ne ! chetarAya ne ? lokothI chetarAIne ja e 'komanasensa' zIkhyo hoya. ...ane buddhi, sUjha, prajJA ! praznakartA: 'komanasensa' je che te buddhinA AdhAre che ke sUjhanA AdhAre che ? praznakartA : have e je tAraNa kADhe, emAM je potAnI bhUla khoLe, emAM khAlI cULa bhUla ja joI zake ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. sthULa bhUlo joI zake nahIM. paNa sAmA mANasa kevA hoya che badhA, chetaranArA , e badho eno abhyAsa bahu hoya. praznakartA : 'komanasensavALAne sAmAnI prakRtino 'sTaDI' hovo joIe ne ?! dAdAzrI : e hoya ja. enuM nAma ja "komanasensa' kahevAya. tyAre ja e tALuM UghaDe ne ! praznakartA : ko'kanI joDe ApaNane banatuM nA hoya, bagaDayuM hoya. dAdAzrI : "komanasensa' e sUjhanA AdhAre che. sUjha e judI vastu che. e kudaratanI 'giphaTa' che. darekane AMtarasUjha hoya ne, enA AdhAre badhuM cAle. praznakartA : paNa sUjha to AtmAno 'DirekaTa' prakAza che ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, e 'DirekaTa' prakAza nathI. paNa aMtarasUjha e to

Page #114
178 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 177 kudaratanI eka jAtanI 'giphaTa' che. tenA AdhAre saMsAramAM kema karavuM ne kema nahIM, e badhuM calAvyA kare. praznakartA H sUjhamAM buddhi Ave nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA. buddhi to napho ne khoTa ja dekhADe. bIjuM kazuM dekhADe nahIM. praznakartA : to prajJA ane sujhamAM zo phera ? dAdAzrI : sUjha to darekane hoya, jAnavaroneya hoya. nAnuM baccuM hoya ne, te enI sUjha pramANe pharyA kare. kurakuriyuM hoya to ye ene sUjha hoya, prajJA nA hoya. prajJA e to jJAnano prakAza thayA pachI utpanna thanArI vastu che. praznakartA : sUjhathI je kAma thAya e sArAM gaNAya ne ? dAdAzrI : sUjha pramANe kAma kare ne, te kAma bahu sArAM thAya. praznakartA : "komanasensa' ane prajJAmAM zo phera ? dAdAzrI : "komanasensa' e hamezAM saMsAra ukelI Ape, saMsAranAM tALAM badhAM ukelI Ape. paNa mokSanuM tALuM ekaya nA ukelI zake. ane 'jJAna' maLyA sivAya prajJA utpanna thAya nahIM. agara to samakti thayuM hoya to prajJAnI zarUAta thAya. badhAM "tALAM'nI cAvI 'eka' ! have A 'jJAna' maLyA pachI tamAre zuddha vyavahAra mATe zuM joIe ? 'komanasensa' 'kamplITa' joIe. sthiratA evI joIe, gaMbhIratA eTalI joIe. badhA guNa utpanna thavA joIe ne ! e kAcuM paDe eTale cAle nahIM ne bahAra loko 'ekasepTa' kare ya nahIM ne !! tALuM vasAI gayuM hoya to cAvI lagADavI paDe ne ? eka ja cAvIthI badhAM tALAM UghaDe, evI cAvI joIe. kaMI jhUmakhAM rAkhe nA pAlave ! eTale 'komanasensa' che te vyavahAra zuddha rAkhavA mATe che. ane zuddha nizcaya kyAre raheze ? zuddha vyavahAra haze tyAre. ne zuddha vyavahAra kyAre Avaze ? "komanasensa' 'evarIvheara eplIkebala' haze tyAre. saMsAramAM zIkho ATaluM ja ! atyAra sudhI ekaya mANasa amane 'DIsaeDajasTa' thayo nathI. jyAre A lokone gharanAM cAra mANasoye "eDajasTa' thatAM nathI. amAruM joIne ya tamane A 'eDajasTa' thavAnuM AvaDe ke nA AvaDe ? evuM thaI zake ke nA thaI zake ? ApaNe jevuM joIe evuM to ApaNane AvaDe ? A jagatano niyama zo che ? ke jevuM tame jozo eTaluM to AvaDe ja. emAM kaMI zikhavavApaNuM rahetuM nathI. kyuM nA AvaDe ? ke huM tamane Ama je upadeza ApyA karuM chuMne, te AvaDe nahIM. paNa mAruM vartana tame jozo to saheje AvaDI jAya. saMsAramAM bIjuM kazuM nA AvaDe, paNa 'eDajasTa' thatAM AvaDavuM joIe. bIjuM kazuM bhale nA AvaDe, kaMI vAMdho nathI. dhaMdho karatAM ocho AvaDe to ye vAMdho nathI, paNa 'eDajasTa' thatAM AvaDavuM joIe. eTale vastusthitimAM 'eDajasTa" thatAM zIkhavuM joIe. A kALamAM 'eDajasTa' thatAM nA AvaDe to mAryo jaIza. phariyAda ? tahIM, 'eDajasTa' ! evuM che ne, gharamAMya "eDajasTa' thatAM AvaDavuM joIe. ApaNe satsaMgamAMthI moDA ghera jaIe to gharavALAM zuM kaheze ?" thoDuMghaNuM 'TAImasara' to AvavuM joIene ?" te ApaNe vahelA ghera jaIe e zuM khoTuM ? pelo baLade ya cAle nahIM, to ene ghoMca mAre. enA karatAM e AgaLa haiDato hoya to pelo ghoMca nA mAre ne ! nahIM to pelo ghoMca mAre, ne Ane ThaMDavuM paDe. ThaMDavuM to che ja ne ? tame joyeluM evuM? peluM pAchaLa khIlAvALuM hoya te mAre. mUMguM prANI zuM kare ? kone phariyAda kare che ! A lokone jo ghoMca mArI hoya to temane bIjAM bacAvavA nIkaLe. peluM mUMguM prANI kone phariyAda kare ? have Amane kema AvuM mAra khAvAnuM thayuM ? kAraNa ke pahelAM bahu phariyAdo karI hatI, tenAM A pariNAma

Page #115
180 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 179 AvyA. te dahADe sattAmAM Avyo tyAre phariyAdo kara kara karI. have sattA nathI eTale phariyAda karyA vagara rahevAnuM. eTale have 'plasa-mAInasa' karI nAkho. enA karatAM phariyAdI ja nA thavuM zuM khoTuM ? phariyAdI thaIe to AropI thavAno vakhata Ave ne ? ApaNe to AropIye thavuM nathI ne phariyAdIye thavuM nathI. sAmo gALa bhAMDI gayo ene jamA karI devAnuM. phariyAdI thavAnuM ja nahIM ne ! tamane kema lAge che ? phariyAdI thavuM sAruM ? paNa enA karatAM pahelethI ja 'eDajasTa' thaI jaIe te zuM khoTuM ?! 'DAuna' sAthe "levalIMga' praznakartA : ApaNe amuka 'levala' upara AvI gayA ane bIjAM e 'levala" upara nathI. have enI sAthe kAma to karavAnuM che ja. eTale ghaNI vakhata tyAM pachI meLa khAto nathI. dAdAzrI : e meLa to nA paDe ne ! e meLa paDe nahIM, paNa ApaNe ene "eDajasTa' thavAnuM che. tethI ja meM kahyuM ne ke tyAM 'samabhAve nikAla karajo. ahaMkAra hoya ne jAgRti hoya tene matabheda paDyA kare. eTale jene ahaMkAra jAgrata thayo hoya teNe savAranA pahoramAM pAMca vakhata bolavuM joIe ke ApaNe badhAM eka ja chIe ane ApaNAmAM judAI nathI." e pAMca vakhata bole ane evuM nakkI kare, eTale Akho dahADo eTaluM rahe. pachI bIje dahADe pAchuM pharI bolavuM paDe, nahIM to pAchuM peluM 'cArja karyuM hatuM te UtarI jAya ! gharamAM traNa mANasa hoya te traNeya mANase A pramANe bolavuM joIe. praznakartA : jene jene matabhedo che e badhAM A muddA para ekamata kevI rIte thAya ? emAMya matabheda paDe to ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. ema nahIM. e to emAM ApaNe kahIe ne, ke jo matabheda ApaNe TALavo hoya, matabheda tamane nA gamato hoya to ApaNe badhAM bhegAM thaIne 'dAdA'nA kahyA pramANe karIe. tyAre kaheze ke zuM karIe ? to kahevuM ke, 'dAdAjIe kahyuM che ke "ApaNe badhA eka ja chIe, ApaNAmAM kaMI judAI nathI" evuM pAMca vakhata bolo.' AvuM pAMca vakhata bolo to enuM "cArja' covIsa kalAka cAle evuM che, e "cArja) covIsa kalAka rahe evuM che. pAchuM bIje dahADe bolavuM paDe. nahIM to pachI 'pAvara" UtarI jAya. Ama karatuM karatuM rAge paDI jAya. kAcA kADhatA tA thavAya ! evuM che ne, ApaNane vadhu 'lAITa' hoya to ene 'DIma' karI zakAya. paNa 'DIma' lAITavALAne vadhu na karI zakAya. ApaNuM vadhu lAITa che ne, eTale 'DIma lAITa' karIne enI joDe besavuM. tamAre 'lAITa' vadhI jAya to A bhAI joDe kevI rIte kAma levuM, e phiTa karI do cho ne ? evuM badhe 'phiTa' karI devAnuM. ApaNe 'phiTa karI devAnuM che, badhI anaMtazakti che ! tame 'dAdA'nuM nAma daIne kaho ke "he dAdAjI, mane phiTa thajo' to 'phiTa thaI jAya tarata. ane ApaNA bhAvamAM nakkI che ke koIne kiMcitamAtra duHkha nA ho. evuM ApaNe nakkI kareluM hoya to tene duHkha thAya ja nahIM. eTale ApaNe nakkI karavuM joIe. abhedatA Ama sadhAya ! eka jaNa mane kahe che ke, "gharamAM amAre matabheda rahe che to te kevI rIte jAya ? teno upAya batAvo.' tene kahyuM, 'moTI uMmaravALA matabhedavALA hoya che. jyAre nAnAM chokarAMne to matabheda hoto nathI. jene bAkI jagata to bahu judI jAtanuM che. gharamAM ApaNe matabheda TALavo hoya to ya bahArathI loka phAcara mArI jAya. mane koI kahe ke 'phalANAbhAI AvA che' to huM tene ja pahelo pakaDuM ke 'tuM mane Ama kahevA ja kema Avyo ? e mane kahe, tuM kahevA Avyo mATe tuM ja gunegAra che." evA mANasa, je kahevA Avene, tenI para to cokaDI ja mUkI devI. vagarakAmanuM ApaNA pUchayA vagara je kaMI paNa kahevAmAM Ave che tenA para ApaNe cokaDI mUkI devI. evA mANasane to meM cokaDI ja mUkelI hoya. e ghAlameliyA kahevAya. ghAlameliyAne to aDavA ja nA daIe. mArI pAse to koI mANase kazI ghAlamela karI nathI. vakhate evI vAta mane karavA Avyo hoya to enAthI

Page #116
182 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : Apa kaho cho ke "jJAna nahotuM tyAre 'velDIMga' karavAthI bahu aDacaNa AvI, e kevI rIte ? dAdAzrI : khUba ja aDacaNa AvelI. mAro svabhAva pahelethI, nAnapaNamAMthI kevo ? 'velDIMga' karavAno. koI jagyAe vikhavAda Ubho thayo hoya to 'velDIMga' karIe ame. 'velDIMga' to UMcAmAM UMco guNa che. enA mATe to koI kazI bhAMjagaDa ja nA UThAve ne ! 'velDIMga karavAthI amane bahu aDacaNa paDelI. chatAMya e aDacaNa veThIneya paNa 'velIMga' kara kara kareluM. praznakartA : tame be jaNanuM sAdhavA jAva to ekane phAve nahIM, evuM bane ? AptavANI-9 181 evI vAta thAya paNa nahIM. kharI rIte dharma saMbaMdhamAM koInIye vAta sAMbhaLavI nahIM. huM to saMsAra saMbaMdhIye koInI vAta nA sAMbhaLe ne ! koI kahe ke, "hIrAbA AvuM bolatAM hatAM.' to huM kahuM ke, 'tAre mane kema kahevuM paDyuM ? e mane kahe, AnAthI tane zuM phAyado ?" ApaNA satsaMgamAMya je ghAlameliyA hoya tene to khoLI kADhavA joIe, ane enAthI badhAne cetavavA joIe. ApaNane enA joDe kaMI rAga-dveSa nathI, paNa badhAMne cetavA mATe karavuM paDe. ApaNane to koI kahevA ja zuM Ave che temAMya A keTalAka to evAM hoya, jANe hitecchu thaIne vAta kare. koInuM kaheto hoya to ApaNe tenuM sAMbhaLIe ja nahIM. evuM kahenArane ja pakaDatAM AvaDavuM joIe ke amane kema kahevA Avyo che ? tane zuM dalAlI maLe che ? tane zo phAyado thAya che, te tuM A mane kahevA Avyo che ?" kharI rIte koInuMye evuM kazuM saMbhaLAya ja nahIM. paNa Aje mANasanAM mana kAcAM paDI jAya che. bAkI AvI toDaphoDanI vAta hoya, 'seboTeja'nI vAta hoya to koInIye vAta sAMbhaLIe ja nahIM. kAraNa ke enI vAta ApaNe sAMbhaLIe eTale ApaNuM mana pelA mATe bagaDe, ne enI asara pAchI sAmA para paDe. paNa mANasanuM samajavAnuM gajuM nahIM. vakhate pelo "inaDirekTa' kaheto hoya tyAM e pote 'DirekTa' laI le ! ane ApaNA lIdhe sAmAne saheja paNa Dakho thAya evuM bolavuM e moTAmAM moTo guno che. chatAMya loka to bole ja che ne ! UlaTuM evuM bolyA hoya to ye dAbI devuM joIe, enuM nAma mANasa kahevAya. koI jagyAe koI mANasa ukaLATamAM bolI gayA hoya to ye ene ApaNe dAbI devuM joIe. dAdAzrI : nA, evuM nahIM. 'velDIMga' to ame evI rIte karIe ke beune phAve te ghaDIye. ane beuna nA phAvatuM hoya to 'velIMga" thAya paNa nahIM. 'velDIMga karavuM, e to evI siddhi hoya che mANasamAM. 'velDIMga" to, beunA sAMdhA bhegA karI ApIe ne tarata 'velIMga' karI ApIe. paNa e 'velDIMga' pachI pAchaLa mane bahu nukasAna thayeluM. dareka vakhate nukasAna, nukasAna ne nukasAna ! praznakartA : kaI rIte ? eno dAkhalo Apo ne ! dAdAzrI : A be bhAIo Ama cAra pAMca vakhatathI laDhatA hoya, sAmasAmI bahu gharSaNa thaI jatuM hoya, to pachI huM zuM karuM ? beune 'velDIMga' karI ApuM. have mArI kiMmata 'phrenDa' tarIke kyAM sudhI vadhAre hoya ? e vaDhatA hoya tyAM sudhI, beunI AgaLa vadhAre hoya. ane 'velDIMga' karI ApuM eTale ghaNI jagyAe to mArA paisA hau gayA che. jo 'velDIMga nA karyuM hota to meM ApelA paisA mArA hAthamAM Avata. have, 'velDIMga' karyuM, ekanA eka ja thaIne ! paNa e to ekanA eka ja, huM judo. paNa kudarata e jue che ne ! te hisAba meM cAlu rAkhelo. bAkI mane AvA kaDavA anubhava thaI gayelA. paNa ApaNe to kudarata upara choDI dIdheluM ne ! 'velIMga' karavAthI rUpiyA hau mArA gayelA. jo 'velIMga'nA karyuM hota to rUpiyA AvI jAta. pelI baI kaheta, 'emanA velDIMga', sUkSma saMdhANa ! amAre to pahelethI ja, jJAna thatAM pahelAMya AvI phAcaranI vAta kaheto hoya to sAMbhaLIe ja nahIM. UlaTuM koInuM tUTatuM hoya to sAMdhI ApIe, 'velDIMga' karI ApIe. paNa jJAna nahotuM ne eTale A 'velDIMga' karavAthI amane aDacaNa bahu paDelI.

Page #117
AptavANI-9 183 184 AptavANI-9 rUpiyA kema nathI ApI detA ?' A to baIeya kazuM kahe nahIM. A eka dAkhalo tamane samajAyo ? enA parathI bIjA dAkhalA banatA haze ? velDIMga' karatArAte.... ane loko zuM kare ? ke eka phero mAra khAya eTale pachI 'velDIMga' karavAnuM choDI de, phAcara ja pADa pADa kare. eTale eno ropha to rahe TheTha sudhI ! phAcara nA pADe evA mANaso ghaNAM hoya che. paNa phAcara paDelI sAMdhI Ape nahIM, ane eya potAnA ropha mATe. bAkI, pote phAcara pADanAra, evA mANaso kharAM. paNa evA jUja mANaso hoya. paNa phIcara paDelI hoya temAM potAno lAbha che, eTale e phAcara pADelI sAMdhI Ape nahIM pachI. ane mArA jevI to bhUla (!) ko'ka ja karatA haze ! te meM badhe ja kareluM. eka jagyAe nahIM, badhe ja sAMdhI ApeluM. kAraNa ke mAro dhaMdho ja sAMdhavAno, toDavAno nahIM ne ! praznakartA : A 'velDIMga' to dAdA, bahu moTuM vijJAna che ! dAdAzrI : hA, vijJAna bahu moTuM che. paNa jagatane mAphaka Ave nahIMne ! jagata to, be jaNa bhegA thaI gayA eTale bhaI kaheze, "e AvA che.' tyAre peloya kahevA lAge, 'hA, evA che." mArI vAta samajaNa paDavI joIe ne ?! amArA kuTuMbamAM paNa evuM thayeluM. 'velDIMga' kare eTale mAra paDe, ane 'velDIMga" nA kare to 'Avo kAkA, Avo kAkA' kare. paNa e mArathI badhAMe vairAga Apyo ne ?! pachI ApaNane saravALe zuM Ave che ? vairAga Ave. nahIM to vairAga te Ave ja nahIM ne ! A jagata joDe zI rIte vairAga Ave ?! tamane Ave vairAga thoDo ghaNo ? ane A 'velDIMga' karavAmAM to haMmezAM mAra ja khAvo paDaze, jo 'velDIMga" karazo to, 'velDIMga' karanAro mAra ja khAya, A duniyAmAM. ane te paNa pachI vairAga Ave ke A beunA sukhane mATe 'velDIMga' kayune, to ya ApaNane ja mAra paDyo ?! te eTalo badho ame mAra khAdho che, ke pAra vagarano mAra khAdho che. bhAva"mAM pAchuM nA paDAya. praznakartA : mArI prakRtimAM 'velDIMga' karavAnuM zarUAtamAM hatuM. pachI mAra paDyo eTale 'velDIMga' karavAnuM baMdha thaI gayuM. dAdAzrI : baMdha thaI jAya ne ! jagata badhAne evuM. khAnadAnane ghera ucharelo mANasa hoya tene 'velDIMga' karavAno mULa bhAva utpanna thAya. pachI mAra khAya eTale chUTI jAya. e to sahana nA karI zake ne ! mAra paDaze emAM to. jo jo mAra khAvAnI zakti hoya to ja AmAM UtaravuM. praznakartA : Ameya kyAM nathI mAra paDato. AtmAnuM bagADIne mAra sahana karavo, enAM karatAM AtmAnuM ja nA sudhArIe ? dAdAzrI : kAraNa ke AtmA to aMdara samajI ja jAya che ke "A mane gadheDo kahe che ne Ama kahe che ne tema kahe che." enAM phaLeya maLe che. ane 'velDIMga kare che teya AtmA samajI jAya che. e AtmapakSI thayA, ane pudgalamAM mAra paDe che. praznakartA: paNa e rIte vairAga UMco Avato hoya to vAMdho nathI. dAdAzrI : vairAga to bahu UMco Ave. paNa jo pelA mANasano ApaNane abhAve thaI jAya to zuM thAya ? ApaNA manamAM jo ehakAra jAge ke "jo huM AmanuM sAruM karavA gayo ne e loko AvA " ahIM mANasane pelo abhAva utpanna thaI jAya, to zuM thAya ? praznakartA : e bIjo khADo. A khADAne badale bIjo khADo. dAdAzrI : bIjo khADo pAcho Ubho kare. e badhuM ame nahIM kareluM. amAro ahaMkAra bhAre hato, paNa A nahIM kareluM. aDacaNa veThIne paNa A nahIM kareluM. pahelethI ja sUjha, 'velDIMga'tI ! praznakartA H ahaMkAreya nA jAge ane 'velDIMge'ya thAya, mAra paDe to ya potAne vAMdho nA Ave. e tame kaI rIte rAkheluM ?

Page #118
AptavANI-9 185 dAdAzrI : e evo ahaMkAra haze, e jAtano ! praznakartA H ame kevI rIte evuM rAkhIe ? have amArI pAse to A jJAna che. dAdAzrI : tamane to "mAra khAvo che" evuM nakkI karo, tyAra pachI rahe. nahIM to ya mAre ja che ne ! jagatamAM koNa mAra khAdhA vagara rahe che ? enA karatAM A sIdhA ja mAra khAva ne ! praznakartA : e barAbara che. ne A to mAreya paDe ne potAnuM ya bagaDe. dAdAzrI : nA, have A to mahIM baLatarA baMdha thAya ne mAra khAvAno. ane peluM to baLatarA, mAra, badhuM sAthe. mAre to, deha che tyAM sudhI paDyA ja karavAno. jo ke amane to A "jJAnI" thayA pachI mAra nathI paDyo. amane to "jJAna" thayA pachI 'A konA karmano udaya che ne kevI rIte AvyuM, AmAM ApaNo bhAga haze tyAre ja mAre ne !' badhuM dekhAyane ! nahIM to ya have mane nathI AvyuM AvuM. eTale meM to pahelAM mAra khAI lIdhelA che. AvA keTalAka hoya ? duniyAmAM enI gaNatarI hoya ne ? chokarAMne "phAdhara' laDhatA hoya, eneya 'velDIMga' karI ApyuM hoya. te pachI eka thaI gayA pachI ApaNo hisAba tyAM cAle nahIM. praznakartA : emAM evuM bane ke ApaNe 'velDIMga' karavA jaIe ne pelo e vAtane sahamata nA thAya ne uparathI ApaNane ja bATake ke "tame ja AvA cho, pelAno khoTo pakSa karo cho ne Ama karo cho !" dAdAzrI : nA, evuM nathI. mArI pAse evuM kahevA jevuM hatuM ja nahIM ne ! huM to, ajJAnadazA hatI to ya ko'kane saLI karavA jevuM ja rAkhato nhoto. are, AMgaLI karavA jevuM ya nahoto rAkhato. mATe evuM nA bane. e to beu upakAra bhAvamAM jAya te vakhate. pachI cA-pANI badhuMya kare. ane tyAra pachI be kharekharA bhegA thaI jAya, tyAra pachI vAMdho Ave. 'velDIMga', eka kaLA ! praznakartA : paNa amane 'velDIMga' karatAM nA AvaDe to UMdhuya thAya. 186 AptavANI-9 - dAdAzrI : e to tame e lAyakAta dharAvatA nathI. mAre evuM nahIM baneluM. e lAyakAta jarA kAcI hoya to ja evuM bane. bAkI, amAre evuM bane nahIM. badhAM 'ekasepTa' ja kare. huM kahuM ke AvuM che, to te badhAM 'ekasepTa' karI de. A tamAre to kacAza dazAmAM che. keTalIka vakhata potAnAmAM evA kacAzavALA guNo hoya ane sAmAne zAMta karavA jAya, sAmAnuM tUTeluM sAMdhavA jAya, eTale pachI pote bIjAnI joDe tUTI jAya, e badhI kAcI dazAo. huM to tUTuM ja nahIM. koI dahADo tUTayo ja nathI koInI joDe. kacAza hoya tyAM sudhI pelAne Uge ja nahIM ne ! eTale sAmo mANasa toDIne majabUta kare to vAta judI che. paNa huM nA toDuM. huM bIDI nA pIto houM ne pelAne kahyuM ke "eya bIDI nA pIvAya' eTale pelo 'ekasepTa" karI de. evI zakti hovI joIe ne ! tamAre ko'kanI joDe mitrAcArImAM tUTI jatuM hoya ane tame lokonuM sAMdhavA nIkaLo, to tamArI mahIM zakti ja kAma nA kare ne ! praznakartA : koI vakhata 'velDIMga' karatAM nA phAvyuM to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : lAyakAta nA hoyane pachI ApaNe choDIe karIe e kAmanuM nahIM ne ! bane eTaluM karavuM ane nA thAya to choDI devAnuM. manamAM bhAva rAkhavAnA ke A 'velDIMga" thAya to sAruM. Ama paddhatisara 'veDIMga nA thAya to bhAva rAkhavAnA. paNa bhAva to tUTavA nA devo joIe. 'vikhuTA paDI jAya to sAruM evuM to hovuM ja nA joIe ne ! e bhegAM che te ja du:khamAM che ne ! eya manamAM to ema ke 'A kyAM bhAMjagaDamAM phasAyA !" ane ene pAchAM ApaNe vikhUTA pADavA jaIe ! e nA hovuM joIe. praznakartA : paNa e ghaDIe dAdA, samatA nA rahe. te ghaDIe ema thaI jAya ke "A AvuM kare che ?" dAdAzrI : e kacAza eTalI badhI ! e kacAza ne ! e evuM ja kare emanA TAIme. sApane dUdha pAIne moTo karIe, ucherIe, pachI ekAda dhola ene mArI juo joIe ! 'meM ATalA dahADA dUdha pAyeluM che, eka dhola mAruM.' to zuM kare che ?! praznakartA : have, jenuM 'velDIMga' karIe e pachI sAmo thAya eTale

Page #119
AptavANI-9 187 ema thAya ke "Ama kema kare che ?" to te ahaMkArathI ja 'velDIMga' thayeluM kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, ahaMkArathI ja thayeluM. enI mIThAza khAvA mATe. praznakartA : bhAvamAM hoya ke 'veDIMga' karavuM, paNa karAya nahIM. pahelAM mIThAza lAge, paNa pachI sahana nA thAya eTale choDI de. dAdAzrI : e to pachI bhAva rAkhavo. pachI 'velDIMga' thAya to ThIka che, nahIM to bhAva rAkhavo. ane je thayuM emAM 'emanuM hatuM ne emane thayuM" evuM ApaNane hovuM joIe. 'velDIMga'thI sarvatra AnaMda ! eTale 'A badhA zI rIte bhegAM thAya ? gUMca zI rIte nIkaLe ?" e badhI bahu vastu jANe, ene to 'veDIMga'no karanAra kahevAya. praznakartA : ApanuM je 'velDIMga' che e sUkSma levalanuM hoya che. lokonAM ghULamAM hoya che. dAdAzrI : hA, dhULamAMya badhA bahu hoya che evA. praznakartA : Apano A guNa mane bahu gamyo. Apa kevI rIte badhAne samajAvI karIne 'velDIMga' karo ne chevaTe badhAMya AnaMdamAM AvI jAya, evuM karI Apo cho. dAdAzrI : ane badhA AnaMdamAM Ave eTale eno pachI mane AnaMda AnaMda rahe. vakhate koInuM moDhuM caDheluM hoya to tene pahelAM huM pUchuM ke, 'zuM che te Ama che, tema che ? zA duHkhe moTuM caDhAve che ? maravAnuM to che ja, to jIvatAM zA hAruM AnaMdamAM nahIM rahevAnuM ?! maravAnuM ja che, te dahADe joI laIzuM. paNa atyAre to AnaMdamAM rahevAnuM.' e to varSa - be varSa duHkhamAM nA hoya ne pachI pAchAM du:khamAM ne du:khamAM. A deha ja evo che pudgalano ke du:kha ja lAge. deheya mAthuM caDhe tyAre nA du:kha lAge ? tyAre jo dehanuM du:kha lAge che to dhaNInuM 188 AptavANI-9 nA lAge ?! paNa toya 'velDIMga' thaI gayA pachI be bhegA thaI jAya che, te kharI majhA Ave che ! 'jJAtI'tI maulika vAto praznakartA: 'velDIMga' zabda to, dAdAnI maulika vAta che ! dAdAzrI : 'velIMga' zabda ja 'dAdA'no che ! koI kahe ke "meM be jaNane 'velDIMga' karI ApyuM" to e 'dAdA'no ja zabda che, e vAta cokkasa thaI jAya. A 'velIMga' vastu ja maulika che. atyAre to ghaNA mANaso A 'velDIMga' zabda zIkhyA. praznakartA : A ja keTaluM moTuM vijJAna che ! dAdAzrI : tyAre AvA to badhA bahu vijJAna che mArI pAse ! praznakartA : e kaMIka kADho ne ! dAdAzrI : e to saMjoga hoya to nIkaLe ne !! toDe badhA, sAMdhe viralo ! tame jANatA nahotA ke A 'dAdA che te sAMdhelAne toDatA nathI evuM? praznakartA : e jANuM chuM, ne tUTelAne sAMdhatA hoya che eya khabara che. dAdAzrI : loko to phAcara mAravA Ave. pratyakSane apratyakSa rIte keTalAya vAMdhA UThAve. apratyakSane to ame 'leTa-go' karIe. paNa pratyakSane to ame sAmuM ApI dIdheluM. ame koInuMya cAlavA nathI dIdhuM. chatAM guno hoya to ja cAlavAnuM che ne ! ane te chatAM ema jo ke cAle, to ApaNe jANIe ke pAchalo guno haze, te UkalI gayo. ApaNe jyAM tyAMthI UkelavA ja beThA chIe ne ?! huM to AkhI jiMdagI ukelavA ja beTho . je kaMI hoya te UkelavA ja beTho chuM !!

Page #120
[4] mamatA : lAlaca kAdavathI cheTA sArA ! A saMsArane ghera badhA paroNAnI mAphaka AvelA che. jeTalA dahADA rahyA eTalA dahADA paroNA, pachI cAlyA javAnA. cAlyA jatA nathI dekhAtA ? mamatAvALA ne nA-mamatAvALA, badhAya jatAM rahe che ne ?! mATe eka miniTa bagADazo nahIM. pAMca-pacAsa varSa rahevAnuM tyAM ApaNe eka miniTa zuM karavA bagADIe ? DAgha paDI jAya. lUgaDuM ahIM rahe ane DAgha ApaNane coMTe te DAgha ApaNI joDe Ave. to ApaNe zuM karavA DAgha paDavA daIe ? have DAgha kaMI badhe paDatA nathI. phakta kAdavakIcaDa hoya tyAM ApaNe sAcavIne cAlavuM. dhULa UDe enI ApaNe bahu phikara nathI rAkhatA. dhULa to enI meLe kharI paDe, paNa kAdava to coMTI jAya. dhULa to Ama kapaDAM khaMkherIene, to UDI jAya. paNa kAdava to nA jAya ne DAgha paDI jAya. mATe jyAM kAdavakIcaDa jevuM che tyAM ApaNe cheTAM rahevuM. nirapekSa jIvata bhALyA 'jJAtItAM' saMpUrNa zuddhatA koIka phero ja hoya duniyAmAM, kAraNa ke ajJAnIonAM to jIvana badhAM sApekSa hoya che. ane kramikamArganA jJAnIonAM, te badhAnAM jIvana paNa sApekSa hoya. eka 'amane' bhagavAne apavAda rAkhyA che ke 190 AptavANI-9 nirapekSa jIvana ! hA, koI jAtanI apekSA nahIM evuM jIvana !! tyAM saMpUrNa zuddhatA hoya. koIpaNa jAtano DAgha tyAM nA hoya. mamatA nAmeya nahI jagatanAM loka apekSA vagara hoya nahIM, kaMI paNa apekSA hoya. ane A 'jJAnI puruSa' to nirapekSa ! eTale koI paNa prakAranuM emanAmAM mamatva nahIM ke deha mAro che, ke mana mAruM che, ke citta mAruM che, ke A mAruM che, ke te mAruM che. evuM koI paNa prakAranuM mamatva nahIM, tethI A ajAyabI vijJAna che. ame sUrata gayA hatA. tyAM sUratanA eka tyAgI puruSa hatA, bahu jabarajasta tyAgavALA mANasa, bahu tapasvI mANasa. AjubAjunA lagabhaga ghaNA mANaso emanAM darzana kare evA e mANasa. tyAM emaNe A badhA lokone zuM kahyuM ? ke, "juo, juo, A 'dAdA' koNa che ? mamatvarahita puruSa joyA hoya to A ekalA ja joyA. lagabhaga baso mANasone huM maLyo chuM, moTA moTA mANasone, saMtone, paNa evo meM eka paNa saMta nA joyo ke je kaMI paNa mamatArahita hoya. thoDIkeya mamatA hoya evA maLelA badhA. jyAre A eka ja puruSa, A dAdA ekalA ja joyA ke je mamatArahita che. mArI jiMdagImAM eka ja A mamatA vagaranA puruSa joyA." huMye samajuM ke dhanya che, tamane ATalI parIkSA karatAM AvaDI. kAraNa ke huM mArI jAtane jANuM ke mamatva to che ja nahIM. nAnapaNathI ja mamatva nahIM ! eTale mamatA vagarano puruSa ja duniyAmAM nA hoya. mamatA vagarano puruSa eTale ahaMkArarahita puruSa. jyAM mamatA nA hoya tyAM ahaMkAra khoLavAno hoya nahIM. eTale 'jJAnI puruSa' to kevA hoya ? mamatA vagaranA hoya, ahaMkAra ne mamatA vagaranA hoya ! te jema kudarata rAkhe tema rahe. emanuM potApaNuM nA hoya. saMpUrNa tirmamatva tyAM paramAtmapaNuM ! jyAM potAne svArtha che, jyAM AgaLa kaMIka mamatA che, tyAM kaMI

Page #121
AptavANI-9 191 paNa kalyANa nA thAya. saheja mamatA hoya tyAM kalyANa nA thAya. ane mamatA nA hoya tyAM bhagavAna pragaTa thaI jAya. mamatAne lIdhe ja ahaMkAra Ubho rahyo che. praznakartA : paNa evuM thAya ke mamatAne kAraNe ahaMkAra thAya ne ahaMkArane lIdhe rAga thAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. mamatAne laIne ja A badhuM UbhuM rahyuM che. 'Aya' zene laIne UbhuM rahyuM che ? 'mAya'ne laIne. nahIM to 'Aya' e paramAtmA che. 'mAya eTale mamatA. 'Aya' ane 'mAya' enuM 'separezana' thaI jAya to rahyuM zuM ? 'Aya.' ane e ja paramAtmA che. praznakartA : A nirmamatva jo badhAMne thAya to badhAM jJAnIo thaI jAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. nirmamatva thAya to e jJAnI ja thayo ne, pachI ! kAraNa ke tIrthaMkaro jeTalA thayelA e badhA nirmamatva ! tyAM mamatva UbhuM nA hoya. praznakartA : A mamatva thAya che e zenA AdhAre thAya che ? dAdAzrI : lAlacanA AdhAre, koIpaNa lAlacane lIdhe. praznakartA : e badhuM gayA janmamAM kareluM hoya ene lIdhe hoya ke ? dAdAzrI : e to tame A 'jJAna'mAM AvyA pachI samajyA ke A gayA janmanuM kareluM. saMsAranA lokone to samajaNa paDe ja nahIM ne ! e lAlaca che emanI. ughADI, khullI lAlaca dekhAya ane lAlaca hoya tyAM mamatA rahe ja, avazya. amane lAlaca pahelethI nahotI, mAna bahu hatuM. praznakartA : to A je ahaMkAra Ubho che, e lAlaca ane mamatAne lIdhe ja Ubho che ? dAdAzrI : 'mAya'ne lIdhe 'Aya' Ubho rahyo che. nahIM to 'Aya' 'klIara' thAya to paramAtmA ja che. 'Aya' jyAM sudhI 'mAya' sAthe che 192 AptavANI-9 tyAM sudhI ahaMkAra che. jenuM 'mAya' gayuM teno ahaMkAra gayo, te paramAtmA thayo ! dIvA jevI vAta che. e ja lakSaNa mamatAnAM ! mamatA to enuM nAma kahevAya ke jemAM jIva bharAI jAya. jema ApaNe kahIe ke 'A mAruM' eTale enI mahIM jIva bharAyo pAcho ne e bhAMgI jAya to zuM kare ? A pyAlA phUTI jAya ApaNA to upAdhi ! are, ghaNA kharA AvaDA AvaDA bAbA hoya te Ave tyAre huM temane cA pIne mUkI rAkhyo hoya ke kapa dekhADI kahyuM, "bAbA A cAno pyAlo nAkhI de bahAra.' tyAre bAbo zuM kahe ? ke 'nakhAtuM haze ?' ema karIne bAbo khabhA caDhAve. AmAM mamatAnI samaja nathI paDatI ? te pahelAM, e khabhA zuM kAma caDhAve che ? pachI bAbAne kahyuM ke, dAdAjIno bUTa nAkhI de.' tyAre e kahe, 'nA nakhAya.' juo A samajaNavALA bahu cokkasa che. A to ahaMkArane laIne badhuM UMdhuM thaI gayuM che. ham ham ham ham !! praznakartA : A ahaMkAra jJAna dvArA maTato haze ne ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra eTale ajJAnatA ! ahaMkArano artha ja ajJAnatA !! ane jJAna eTale nirahaMkAratA. eTale jJAnathI koI ahaMkAra nA maTe evuM nathI. jJAna ja nirahaMkAratA ane ajJAna eTale ahaMkAratA, A be ja sTezana che ! mamatAto vistAra ! bAkI jagata to mamatAnA choDavAne ja pANI pA pA kare che. jagata AkhuM zuM kare che ? mamatAnAM choDavAne uchere che ke 'A amAruM, A amAruM, A amAruM,' tyAre ene pUchIe ke, 'kayuM tAruM nahIM ?" tyAre kahe, A hoya amAruM, A amArA bhAInuM.' pachI thoDAM varSa pachI pAcho kahe che, 'bhAIe amAruM dabAvyuM che.' are, keTaluM dabAvyuM che ? tyAre kahe, 'ATaluM, doDha hAtha dabAvI dIdhuM.' te pAcho korTamAM jAya. vakIlane kahe ke, 'sAheba, ATaluM badhuM dabAvI dIdhuM.' te pAcho e 'chelle sTezane' jato rahe, ne pachI chokaro hau laDhe. ane chokaro hau kahe ke

Page #122
AptavANI-9 ATaluM dabAvyuM che ! have Amane akkalavALA kahevA ke akkalanA kothaLA kahevA ? vecIe to keTalA paisA Ave ? cAra AnA ya nA Ave, nahIM ? 193 ane e mamatA to eTale sudhI ke 'hindustAnano deza amAro' kaheze. pachI gujarAtamAM zuM kaheze ? 'gujarAta amAro.' tyAM koIka gujarAtamAM che te badhA vAto kare ke 'saurASTra to tamAruM, paNa amAruM carotara bahu sAruM'. te AkhA carotaranA mAlika thaI bese ! pachI carotaramAM ANaMdavALA kahe ke 'ame AvA.' tyAre A bhAdaraNavALA kahe che, 'amArA bhAdaraNavALA AvA.' te tyAM AkhA gAmano mAlika thaI bese. pachI gAmamAM be khaDakIvALA bUmAbUma karatA hoya tyAre kahe, 'tamArI khaDakI AvI ne amArI khaDakI AvI.' pachI eka ja khaDakIvALAnI mAthAkUTa cAle tyAre kahe, 'tamAruM kuTuMba AvuM ne amAruM kuTuMba AvuM.' kuTuMbavALAnI mAthAkUTa kare tyAre kahe, 'tamAruM ghara AvuM ne amAruM ghara AvuM.' kyAM sudhI, te TheTha be bhAIo joDe bhAMjagaDa Ave tyAre kahe, 'tArA karatAM to huM judo chuM.' te TheTha sudhI AnuM A ja. pachI tyAM sAcavavA TheTha sudhI jAya. gujarAta AkhuM, hindustAna AkhuM sAcavavA phare. AkhA hindustAnamAM pathAro pAtharyo hoya, eno artha zuM che te ?! A to potAnuM kalyANa karyuM nahIM ne AvA badhA pathArA pAthara pAthara kare che. have A draSTibheda koNa karAve che ? buddhi. ane te eTale sudhI draSTibheda karAve che ke badhA loko joDe amAre kazuM levAdevA nahIM. 'A amAruM, A amAruM ghara, amAruM che A badhuM. bIjA koI joDe amAre levA devA nahIM' eTaluM badhuM draSTibheda karAve. ApaNe kahIe, 'tamAruM ghara, to gharamAM tamAre judAI nathI ne ?" tyAre e kahe, 'nA, amArA gharamAM judAI nathI.' paNa jyAre be jaNa pAchA mAMhyomAMhya laDhene, tyAre zuM kare ? gharamAM pAchAM be jaNa mAMhyomAMhya laDhe ke nA laDhe koI dahADo ? praznakartA : hA, laDhe ja ne ! dAdAzrI : tyAre zuM kare pachI ? 'tame AvA.' ne pelo kahe, 'tuM evI.' evuM kare ke nA kare ? ema bheda thato thato kyAM sudhI AvIne 194 AptavANI-9 Ubho rahe ? kyAM sudhI Ave enuM mULa ? potAnI jAta upara ke 'have huM ja chuM. bAkI bIjuM koI mAruM potAnuM nathI.' AvI A bhedadraSTi 'mAruM tAruM, mAruM tAruM' karAve. AnI A ja hAyavoya, hAyavoya, hAyavoya. mamatA 'bAunDarI' pUrvakatI ! eka bhAI kahe che, 'mArI mamatA jatI nathI.' tyAre meM kahyuM ke, 'zI rIte jAya te ? A tamArA makAnanI bAunDarI che, te ATaluM ja tamAruM evuM jANo cho ne ? ke bIjuM AgaLa kaho cho Ama ? ATalI ja bAunDarI, evI bAunDarI batAvo ke nA batAvo tame ? to mamatAnI bAunDarI batAvazo ? mamatAnI bAunDarI keTalI ? gharanI bAunDarI to bIjo hau batAve ke A tamAruM ja che. ema mamatA dekhADavI paDe ne ? A saMsAranA lokoe to mamatAnI 'bAunDarI' joI nathI. dareka vastu 'bAunDarI'thI zobhe. A tamAruM makAna che, have ethI bahAra ApaNI draSTi jAya che ke A joDenuM makAna paNa amAruM che evuM ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : enI 'bAunDarI' che ne ? ema nathI kahetA ne, ke A badhuM ja mAruM che ? eTale meM zuM kahyuM ke mamatA bhale rahe, paNa e 'bAunDarI'pUrvaka hovI joIe. paNa bAunDarI keTalI hovI joIe ? jenI para mamatA karelI hoya e vastu ApaNI joDe Ave, te mamatAnI 'bAunDarI' ! to mamatAnI 'bAunDarI' eTale zuM ke tame jIvatA ho tyAM sudhI tamAruM ja rahe, ane tyAra pachI tamAruM rahe nahIM. A AMgaLInI mamatA rAkhavAnI kahI bhagavAne ke 'A AMgaLI mArI che' kaheje. paNa A vIMTInI mamatA rAkhavAnI nA kahI che. kema ke e vIMTI to jatI rahe, ane ApaNe jatAM rahIe pachIye e ahIM hoya che. pachI to pAchaLavALA loka vIMTI kADhI le ke nA kADhI le ? ane vIMTI nA nIkaLatI hoya ne, to AMgaLI bhAMgIne paNa kADhI le. mATe mamatA tyAM nahIM karavAnI. eTale ApaNA gayA pachI jenuM astitva rahe nahIM, eTalI mamatA ApaNI. ethI AgaLanI mamatA jatI rahevI joIe. eTale mAruM zuM

Page #123
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 195 kahevuM che ke e mamatA kevI javI joIe? ke potAno ekano eka chokaro hoya tenA paranIye mamatA jatI rahe, ane evI badhe ja mamatA javI joIe. A gukhe gappAM nathI. lokonI parIkSAmAM to gukha guNyA gappa karIne javAba lAve toya pAsa thaI jAya. paNa 'jJAnI'nI parIkSAmAM pAsa nA thAya. tyAM gappAM nA cAle. tyAM to "ekajhekTanesa' joIe. vistArelI mamatA ! 'koI 'Isyoransa'vALo joto hoya ke A sTImara DUbI rahI che, te pote Ama jue chatAM paNa ene asara zuM thAya ? ane sTImara DUbI jAya eTale "inzyoransa'vALAe paisA to ApavA paDaze ne ? praznakartA : hA, paisA to ApavA paDe. dAdAzrI : paNa ene kaMI asara thAya kharI ? praznakartA : temane asara nA thAya. dAdAzrI : kema ema ? eTale kaMpanInI vastu hoya te khovAI jAya to kone kone upAdhi thAya ?! badhAM 'amAruM, amAruM' kahe, paNa che kazI mamatA koI jAtanI ? evI be jAtanI mamatA hovI joIe. zarIra upara pUrI mamatA hovI joIe. ane bahAranI mamatA, je vistArelI mamatA che, te AvI hovI joIe. 'A ghara amAruM, A ghaDiyALa amAruM, A vIMTI amArI' kahe che e badhI vistArelI mamatA che. paNa 'jatI vakhate to A loko kAna toDI le ne dAgInA kADhI le. dAdAzrI : A 'isyoransa'vALAne jema kazI asara nA thAya, evI rIte rahevuM joIe. rAkhavI mamatA paNa.. eTale je mamatA karelI vastu ApaNI joDe Ave eTalI ja mamatA karavAnI. agara to evI te kaI cIja che ke jenuM ApaNA gayA pachI astitva rahe nahIM ? 'A paga mAro, hAtha mAro, nAka mAruM, kAna mAro, AMkha mArI, A AMgaLI mArI, dAMta mArA, batrIseya dAMta mArA.' - A zarIramAM to bahu cIjo che baLI. paNa A ATalI mamatA kare toya bahu thaI gayuM. pachI Dakho ja nA rahe ne ! bAkI mamatA bahAra vistAravAnI jarUra nathI. vistArelI mamatA to bhUlathI thaI gaI che. A lokone. e aNasamajaNathI UbhuM thayuM che. bAkI mamatAnI bahAra vistAra karAya ja nahIM. praznakartA : eno artha evo ke A zarIra pUratI ja mamatA rAkhavAnI ? dAdAzrI : A zarIra pUratI ja, ane e mamatA pUrepUrI rAkhavAnI. ene khavaDAvavuM, pivaDAvavuM, A mamatAmAM badhuM bahu sukha che. paNa A sukha nathI letA ne 'A ghara mAruM, A ploTa mAro, A phalANuM mAruM, A mArI vAIpha !" are, nahIM koI thAya tAruM. jene ApaNe "mAruM" kahIe te ApaNA hAthamAM Ave nahIM. ApaNe 'paramenanTa' chIe. vinAzI cIjono meLa ApaNane paDe ja nahIM ne ? Ano guNAkAra ja nA thAya. chevaTe to A deha ApaNo nathI thavAno to vahu ke' dahADe ApaNI thavAnI ?! vahu ApaNI thAya kharI ? Aje A vahune mamatA kara kara karIe ane parama dahADe vahue DAIvorsa lIdho to ? ane A zarIramAM to kazuM bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM ne ! praznakartA : paNa A zarIramAM jhAjhI mamatA rAkhavA jevuM zuM che ? dAdAzrI : to bahAranI mamatA karavA jevuMye zuM che ? eTale kazuM tamAruM nathI. tamAruM hoya te tamArI sAthe Ave. kAyado evo che ke je tamArI vastu che e tamArI sAthe Ave ja, niyamathI ja Ave. je tamArI eTale mamatAnI 'bAunDarI' hovI joIe. darekanI 'bAunDarI' hovI joIe ne ? mamatAnI 'bAunDarI' nA hovI joIe ? praznakartA : eTale vistArelI mamatAvALI vastuo upara rAga-dveSa nA rAkhavo, evuM thayuM ne ?

Page #124
AptavANI-9 197 nathI e vastuo tamArI sAthe AvavAnI nathI. mATe nathI je tamArI, tene mamatA karIne zo artha che ? te miniMgalesa che ne ! praznakartA : paNa zarIramAM te keTalIka mamatA rahe ? dAdAzrI : zarIramAM to bahu cIjo che. A to batrIsa dAMta che. A jIbha ne badhuM juo ne, Ama Akho dahADo kAma kare che, paNa jo kacarAya che koI dahADo ?! eTale ATalI deha pUratI mamatA vadhArene, to bahu thaI gayuM. praznakartA : ATalI mamatA rahe to zuM phAyado ? dAdAzrI : A dehanI mamatA rAkhone, eTale A dehanuM 'eDajasTamenTa' hoya che, darekanI vyavasthA hoya che, enA niyama hoya che, ke AMkhane zuM zuM joIe che, te badhuM ene maLI Ave. kAnane zuM joIe che, peTane zuM joIe che, badhAne joItI vastuo maLI Ave. praznakartA : ekalI zarIra para mamatA AvI gaI to ? dAdAzrI : zarIra para badhI mamatA AvI gaI eTale nirAMte cAra godaDA pAtharIne sUI javAnuM. paNa A to nirAMte sUtAya nathI. praznakartA : paNa lokone mamatA to badhI vistRta hoya ne ?! dAdAzrI : paNa vistAra kare che te konA bApanI divALI ! A darekane icchA to hoya ja ne ?! A kheDUta che, te dareka kheDUtane keTalI jamIna karavAnI icchA haze ? ane jamIna to gaNatarIbaMdha ja che ne ? ane lokonI jamIna mATenI icchA pAra vagaranI che. pelo kaheze 'mAre pAMcaso vIghA joIe." bIjo kaheze 'mAre so vIghA joIe." trIjo kaheze mAre so vIghA joIe.' e guNAkAra ja zI rIte maLe ? Ano guNAkara maLe nahIM, te lokono mAra khAI khAIne dama nIkaLI jAya. 198 AptavANI-9 te baMgalo vecavAnI vAta nIkaLI tyAre e raDavA mAMDyo. e kahe che, "A baMgalo vecazo nahIM, game ema." chatAMya paisAnI aDacaNane laIne baMgalo vecavo paDyo, ne dastAveja thayA pachI e baMgalo baLI gayo. to koIe pelAne pUchyuM ke, "alyA, tAro pelo baMgalo baLI gayo ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'mAre zuM levAdevA ?' 'paNa alyA, e tAro baMgalo hato ne !' tyAre e kahe che, "paNa e vecI dIdho.' have Avo sarasa baMgalo ke jemAM e raheto hato, ne bIje dahADe enI mamatA kema UDI gaI ? praznakartA : baMgalo vecAI gayo tethI ? dAdAzrI : paNa enI mamatA kema UDI gaI ? praznakartA : potAnI mamatA choDI dIdhI eTale gaI. dAdAzrI : choDI to nathI dIdhI, paNa pharajiyAta choDI devI paDI ne ! bIje dahADe baMgalAne Aga lAge to e UlaTo hase, ke cAlo nirAMta thaI ! eTale eka ja dahADAmAM 'mArApaNuM' jatuM rahyuM ? ane ene badalAmAM zuM ApyuM ? kAgaLiyAM ApyAM ?! alyA, 'mArApaNuM" kAgaLiyAthI jAya che ?! hA, jatuM rahyuM, te joyuM ne ! ane kAgaLiyAM jatAM rahe ke nA jatAM rahe ? eya jatAM rahe. jo kAgaLiyAMthI 'mArApaNuM" jatuM rahe che, to ApaNe e samajaNathI kADhIe to zuM khoTuM ? je kAgaLiyAMthI jatuM rahe ene samajaNathI kADhIe e zuM khoTuM ?! ane samajaNathI nIkaLe ke nA nIkaLe ? pachI ghara baLI jAya toye raDe nahIM ne ?!. praznakartA : paNa korTa e dastAveja 'anaveliDa' kare to pAcho raDavA mAMDe. dAdAzrI : hA, to pAcho raDavA mAMDe. praznakartA : Aja sudhI to mamatA nA UDI, evuM kema ? dAdAzrI : e to eno rasto jANyA sivAya nA UDe ne ! ane chevaTe e vIsa lAkhano bAMdhelo baMgalo zuM kahe che ? 'he nagInadAsa zeTha, mITAvo mamatA samajaNathI ! eka mANasane potAno baMgalo che, bahu ja game tevo baMgalo che.

Page #125
AptavANI-9 199 2O AptavANI-9 kAM to tame jatA rahezo ne kAM to huM jato rahIza.' tyAre nagInadAsa zeTha kahe che, 'tuM kyAM jato rahevAno che ?" tyAre baMgalo kahe che. 'tamArI nAdArI nIkaLaze tyAre mAre jatA rahevuM paDaze. ane nahIM toya tame jatA ja rahevAnA cho. huM to Ubho rahIza.' have baMgalo AvuM kahe tyAre zarama bhareluM lAge ke nA lAge ? eTale mamatAno vistAra karyo che A lokoe, khoTo vistAra. makAnano kema vistAra nathI karatA ke "A mAruM ATaluM ja che ?" ane A mamatAno vistAra to AkhI duniyA para kare che. praznakartA : paNa jene mamatAno vistAra moTo ane saMsAranI draSTie moTo mANasa kahe che. dAdAzrI : hA, moTo mANasa kahe. paNa paNa ene duHkheya eTaluM ja ne ! A to khoTI badhAe mamatA vistArI che. "yUjhiyama'nI zarato ! A mamatA bese che te khAlI zenAthI bese che ? saMsArI svabhAvathI. baMdhana-svabhAvathI mamatA bese che. ane buddhie kaMI ochuM kAma karyuM che ? buddhithI A badhuM jagata rUpALu bam jevuM karyuM che ? paNa AmAM phasAvAnI nA kahI che. tuM jo, phara, khA, pI, paNa phasAIza nahIM. paNa to ya ApaNA loka coMTI paDe. nA coMTIza. cAkhIne UMghI jA ne ! A duniyA zuM che ? ke moTAmAM moTuM myujhiyama ! A ApaNA ahIM baroDAnuM myujhiyama che ne, evuM A eka moTuM myujhiyama che. te myujhiyamamAM TikiTa laIne pesatI vakhate zuM zarata hoya che ? ke "aMdara jAva tame. aMdara juo karo, pharo, jeTalA kALa sudhI badhuM joI nA raho tyAM sudhI pharyA karo. khAvAnI cIjo khAjo, pIjo. bhale cA pIvo. bhUkha lAgI hoya to nAsto karavAno. bhogavavAnI cIja bhogavajo. paNa kazuM levAnuM nahIM. chelle daravAje bahAra nIkaLavAnuM thAya te ghaDIe kazuM laIne nahIM nIkaLatA. nahIM to guno lAgu thaze." te emAM peThA pachI pAchI bhAMjagaDa zI karavAnI ? saMgrahasthAna joyA karavAnuM. paNa zene mATe A dhamAla pAchI ? pAchuM bahAra nIkaLatI vakhate kazuM laI javAnuM nahIM. evA A saMgrahasthAnamAM peThA cho. tyAre e kahe che, "sAheba, hAthamAM laIe tyAre bhAMjagaDa ne.' paNa nA, manamAM ya laIne nA nIkaLatA, ane vANImAM ya laIne nA nIkaLatA. kazuM lezo karazo nahIM. chatAM A bhogavavAnI chUTa ApI che, to zuM khoTuM kahe che ? praznakartA : barobara che. dAdAzrI : have tevI rIte nIkaLI javAya ke nA nIkaLI javAya ? paNa loko to bharabhara kare che. are, keTalAka to gajavAmAM hau mUkI lAve che. paNa pachI tyAM pakaDAya. ane manamAM to badhA bahu loko laI gayA badhuM. 'pelI joI hatI enA jevI to nahIM.' tyAre pelI kaheze, 'emanA jevA to meM joyA ja nathI." alyA zuM karavAnA che ?! praznakartA : paNa e saMgrahasthAna ja evuM hoya che ke badhI lAlaco UbhI kare che. dAdAzrI : saMgrahasthAna evuM ja hoya che. paNa joDe laI javAnuM nahIM, evI zarata, eTale pachI zuM ? tamArA gAmamAM joDe laI javAno rivAja kharo ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : to pachI zA hAruM 'hAya, hAya" A badhI ?! jovuM jANavuM ! kerIo AvI te kaMI nAkhI devAnI che ? hAphusanI kerI AvI to nirAMte khAvI, paMkho cAlu karIne. 'erakanDizana" cAlu karo. vAMdho nahIM. paNa joDe laI javAnuM nahIM, ne 'hAya, hAya" karavAnI nahIM. eTale jagata AkhuM saMgrahasthAna che. emAM khAva, pIvo nirAMte. 'TesTaphulI' khAva. Ama to bhogavatA ya nathI. mAthA upara talavAra laTakatI hoya, ane nIce jamavAnuM. baLyAM, tArAM jamavAnAM ! mela pULo ahIMthI. nahIM to talavArano bhaya lAgato hoya to ene kahIne besa ke "jyAre paDavuM hoya to paDaje. ahIM jamavA beThA chIe.' nahIM to Ama mAthe talavAra ane nIce jamavAnuM, evI ekeeka mANasanI A dazA che. ane te moDhA para divela pharI vaLeluM ja

Page #126
AptavANI-9 201 hoya. divela pharI vaLeluM jovAmAM Ave ke nA Ave ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : eTale badhuM khAjo, pIjo. je tamane anukULa Ave te khAjo. strIono kazo vAMdho nahIM. paiNazo nahIM ne paiNo toya te vyavahArathI paiNajo. nizcayanuM paiNazo nahIM. A loka to nizcayathI paiNI jAya che. nizcayathI nahIM paiNatA hoya ? praznakartA : hA, paiNe che ne ! dAdAzrI : have e loko paiNe che ane tame ya paiNo cho. paNa e loko 'mArI, mArI,' karyA kare che. ne tame phAIlano nikAla karo cho, jJAna" lIdhuM che eTale. paNa 'mArI, mArI' kahelI koI cIja joDe laI javAya kharI ? koI laI gayelA kharA ? praznakartA : nA, koI haju sAthe nathI laI gayuM. dAdAzrI : jo joDe laI javAnI zarata nA hoya to zA sAru A 'hAya, hAya" karyA karatAM haze loko ? eTale mahIMthI kazuM lezo nahIM, bahu game toya. lezo to jokhamadArI Avaze. paNa ApaNA loko gajavAmAM ghAlI le che ane pelI bAju nIkaLI jAya. pachI tyAM pakaDe eTale jokhamadArI Ave. eTale A kazuM lezo nahIM, bhogavajo badhuM ya ane "mAruM" karazo nahIM koI. saMgrahasthAnamAM 'mAruM' kahevAtuM haze ? tamane kevuM lAge che. 202 AptavANI-9 evuM hau kahe. tyAre bole enI asara rahe. hA, dareka zabdanI asara rahe. 'joya mArI' kahe tenI asara rahe ane 'mArI' kahe tenI asara rahe. sAyakolojikla IphekTa ja ! amAro eka phrenDa hato, tene dasa ja varSa lagna raheluM, paiNyA pachI. ane pachI vAIpha marI gaI. nAnAM traNa chokarAM mUkIne. te amAro phrenDa raDato hato bahu. tyAre ene AzvAsana loka ApavA jAya ne, te huM ye AzvAsana ApavA gayelo. meM kahyuM, 'zuM karavA raDe che have ? eno zo artha che te ?" tyAre e mane kahe che, 'paNa A traNa chokarAM..... mane to enA vagara gamatuM nathI.' tyAre meM kahyuM, "zuM karIza paNa ? have e pAchI Avaze ?" tyAre e kahe che, "mane gamatuM nathI enuM zuM karuM ?" kahyuM, 'alyA, A tArI vAIpha vagara tane gamatuM nathI. to AjathI agiyAra varSa upara tuM ane A tArI vAIpha gADImAM maLyA hoya to tuM dhakko mAre ke khasa ahIMthI. dasa varSa upara paiNyo hato, te paiNyA pahelA, varSa dahADA pahelAM AvuM bane ke nA bane ?" tyAre e mane kahe che, 'hA, e to oLakhANa nahIM ne !' meM kahyuM, 'A to paiNyAnA varSa dahADA pahelAM ja maLI hoya to vaDhamvaDhA kare.' tyAre e kahe che, "zuM AmAM kahevA mAgo cho ?" meM kahyuM, "tuM paiNavA beTho ne, tyAre zuM roga peTho tane pAcho ? tuM paiNavA beTho te ghaDIe te joI ene. 'A mArI vAIpha' pahelo AMTo mAryo. eNe ya AMTo mAryo ke "A mArA dhaNI'. tyAra pahelAM evA AMTA mArelA nahIM. te A paiNyA tyArathI daza varSathI A mamatAnA AMTA mAra mAra karyA. "mArI, mArI, mArI, mArI !' e eTalI badhI mAnasika 'iphekTa' thaI gaI che, eTalI badhI sAyakolojI" thaI gaI che. eka ja phero bolyA hoya to sAyakolojI thAya, to A to daza varSanI sAyakolojI." tyAre e mane kahe che, 'hA, hA, mane lAge che e sAyakolojI thaI gaI che mane. have zI rIte jAya e ?" kahyuM, 'oya mArI, nhoya mArI, bola. jevI rIte baMdhAyuM che ene choDI nAkha ne ! A eno rasto che. bIjo kazo rasto nathI.' A kharekhara koI baMdhana ja nathI. A to 'sAyakolojI IphekTa' ja thaI jAya che. pachI traNa chokarAM mUkIne vAIpha marI jAya eTale raDe. nA raDe praznakartA : sAcI vAta che. dAdAzrI : ne jyAM kakaLATa che tyAM ja mamatApaNuM che. bahAra koInI joDe kakaLATa che nahIM. pAcho kahe, 'mArI vahu nAlAyaka che.' tyAre alyA 'mArI' zuM karavA bole che ? 'mArIpaNuM' to ya choDato nathI. nA choDe, nahIM ? praznakartA : A 'mArI' kahevuM ane 'nAlAyaka' kahevuM e be sAthe bolAya che e koIne vicAra ja nA Ave. dAdAzrI : hA, 'mArI vahu nAlAyaka che, DAIvorsa ApavA jevI che'

Page #127
AptavANI-9 203 bicAro ? paNa pachI AvI samajaNa paDI eTale khuza thaI gayo. nhoya oLakhANa ! A to 'mArI, mArI' karIne coMTyuM che A badhuM. A 'nhoya mArI, nhoya mArI' kare ke UDI jaze. enI ame gerenTI ApIe chIe. koI paNa vastu 'mArI' karIne karyuM hoya te ukhADavI hoya to 'nhoya mArI' kahIe ke UkhaDI jaze. ane tyAM pharI coMTADavuM hoya to 'nhoya mArI' karatAM hoya tene badale 'mArI, mArI' karo ke coMTaze. samaja paDIne ? AmAM guMdaranI jarUra nahIM paDe. guMdara vagara TikiTa coMTe evI che A. mamatA vagereya badhuM prApta ! A to mamatA nAmanuM bhUta pesI gayuM che. e to huM kADhI ApuM to jAya. ame enA bhUvA hoIe. mamatA, DAkaNa che, tenA ame bhUvA hoIe eTale kADhI ApIe. eTale mamatA vagara tuM cAla, to keTaluM badhuM mAna maLaze ! paNa koIe mamatA choDI nathI. huM ene pUchuM chuM ke 'tAre zuM zuM joIe ? zenI zenI bhUkha che ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'mAnanI bahu bhUkha che.' bIjI zenI bhUkha ? tyAre e kahe che, 'thoDAMka A khAvApIvAnA sukha maLe,' tyAre alyA, mamatA choDane, to badhI ja cIja tane sAme maLaze.' tyAre e kahe che, 'e choDuM to mAre jatuM rahe, che te ja jatuM rahe.' eTale pachI mamatA nA choDe. lAlayatAM pariNAme phasAmaNa ! ghaDAmAM hAtha ghAlatI vakhate vAMdarAM Ama karIne hAtha josathI ghAle che, lAlacanAM mAryAM. 'mahIMthI caNA kADhI lauM' kaheze. te josathI hAtha dAbIne ghAle che. ane pachI caNAno muThTho vALyo. have josathI hAtha ghAlyo te pharI nIkaLe to kharo josathI, paNa muThTho vALelo enuM zuM thAya ? te pachI muThTho vALIne kheMce che ne ! pachI hAtha nA nIkaLe eTale cIsAcIsa, cIsAcIsa, cIsAcIsa ! have e zAthI nathI choDI detuM ? ene jJAna che ke 'meM hAtha ghAlyo che to huM kADhI zakuM ema chuM. to kema A nIkaLato nathI ? mATe koIe mane pakaDayo che mahIMthI.' paNa e choDatuM ja nathI, baLyuM. muThI ja choDatuM nathI. ane bahAra cIcIArI, bUmAbUma. chUTavA mATe prayatna kare, AptavANI-9 AkhI mATalIne UThAva UThAva karavA jAya. paNa UThAvAya ja nahIMne ! pelI, AjubAju mATI dabAvI dIdhelIne ! jora karIne uThAve kharo, paNa pAchuM mATalIne e be sAthe pakaDAI jAya. pachI e vAMdarAne loka pakaDI le che. vAMdarA pakaDAI jAya che. te ApaNA loka paNa kArIgara che ne ! kAraNa ke emAM rahIne AvyA che A. emanAM pitarAIone oLakhe che A loko. paNa jo pakaDI le che ne ! vAta to samajavI paDaze ne ? evo svabhAva, chatAM sUkSma avalokta ! pachI, ApaNe tyAM pahelAM AvaDI nAnI mATalIomAM dahIM karatAM hatAM. bilADIne dahIM-dUdha khAvAnI Teva hoyane, te bilADI zuM kare ? e moDhuM ghAle cAkhavA hAruM, kAraNa ke ene sugaMdhI AvI. sugaMdhI AvI eTale samajI gaI ke mahIM che. ane have choDe e bIjo. ane koI che nahIM AjubAju. josathI moDhuM ghAlatI vakhate sTrentha thAya, paNa pAchuM kheMcavuM e sTrentha nA thAya. eTale pachI mATalI laIne pharyA kare. meM joyelI evI bilADIne. dhanya che. loka dahIM khAya, paNa teM to zIkhaMDa khAdho ! 204 tame AvuM nahIM joyeluM ? huM to TIkhaLI hato. te mane AvuM jaDI Ave. nA hoya to koIka mane dekhADavA Ave 'heMDo mAre tyAM.....' TIkhaLI hato to ! tamAre TIkhaLI thavuM paDe enA mATe. nA thavuM paDe ? mAruM kahevAnuM ke TIkhaLI svabhAva ne, tethI A jaDeluM badhuM. praznakartA : ame badhA mATalIo laIne ja pharIe chIe ne ? dAdAzrI : are, phare ja che ne, paNa ! huM jouM chuM ne ? ghaNAnI to meM mATalIo phoDI nAkhelI. tyAre zuM kare bicAro ?! kaMI laIne pharyA kare ! AMkhe dekhAya nahIM. praznakartA : tame evA keTalA mANasanI mATalI phoDI ? dAdAzrI : e to naMbara nahIM kahuM. paNa phoDI che kharI meM mATalI. ane e dekhatA thayAM ne, have. 'have pharI nahIM ghAluM' evo ene anubhava thaI gayo. e anubhava thayA pachI e nA ghAle.

Page #128
AptavANI-9 205 mAnyatA ja vaLagADe mamatA ! bAkI saMsAranI koI cIja naDatI nathI. saMsAramAM naDavA jevuM che ja zuM ? jyAM potAnuM che nahIM ! ane A to potAnuM mAneluM hatuM. potAnuM che ja nahIM, evuM ApaNe 'Disizana' lIdheluM che ne ! ne potAnuM che te mAneluM che. te mAneluM eTale kevuM ? ke ApaNe mAnI lIdhuM hoya ke A beMka ApaNI che. te pachI ApaNe tyAM eka dahADo jaIe ane menejarane kahIe ke, 'bhaI, beMka amArI che. tame have khAlI karo." tyAre e zuM kahe ? eTale e mAneluM te badhuM jelamAM ghalAvaze. evuM mAnIe ja zuM karavA te ? ane mAneluM zuM kAmanuM ? 'Disizana'vALuM hovuM joIe, "ekajhekTa' hovuM joIe. mAneluM to pachI phajetI thAya, ne UlaTuM jelamAM ghalAvaDAve. A to ApaNe mamatA karI tethI baMdhAyuM. bAkI, ApaNI vastu koI che nahIM. deha paNa ApaNo nathI. jo ApaNo hota to ApaNane yArI Ape. paNa A to jatI vakhate juo ne, keTalI upAdhi karIne deha jAya che ane ApaNane ghara khAlI karI devuM paDe che. ane koI avatAramAM mamatA vagara maryA ? kAkA thaIne marI gayA, mAmA thaIne marI gayA, A ja karyuM che ne ! mamatA vagara jo maro to tyAM AgaLa praveza che. ane mamatA sAthe maro to ahIM che ja tamAruM, anaMta avatAra maryA, paNa pelI mamatA to gaI nahIM ne ! e to rahI. hajI to mamatA ja gaI nathI ne ! A mamatA sAcI nathI evuM jJAna thayuM, paNa mamatA haju gaI nathI. 'A mamatA sAcI nathI" evuM jJAna thavuM, eya bahu agharuM che, bahu moTAmAM moTuM agharuM che. je mamatAvALo, te "pote' hoya ! ane meM mamatA vagaranA tamane karyo to ya bolatA nathI tame. tamane mamatA vagaranA kayAM toya tame ema kahetA nathI ke huM ye mamatA vagarano chuM. 206 AptavANI-9 caMdubhAInI, te ApaNe vaheMcI nAkhI. ane 'caMdubhAI" mamatAvALA che, teno vAMdho nathI, 'ApaNI' mamatA gaI che. sahiyArI dukAna vaheMcI nAMkhI. te mamatA kone bhAge gaI ? 'caMdubhAIne bhAga gaI. ApaNe bhAga nA AvI. eTale ukela Avyo. A saMgrahasthAna che. hoTala AvI hoya to ApaNe ya cA pIe chIe ane loko ya cA pIe che. paNa loko A saMgrahasthAnamAM zuM kare che ? 'pelI cA sarasa hatI, A barobara nathI. pelI kaDaka hatI, A kaDaka nathI.' jyAre ApaNe evuM tevuM nathI karatA. je AvyuM teno nikAla ! DrAmeTika mamatA, DrAmA pUratI ! chatAM bhagavAne mamatA nA rAkhavAnuM kahyuM nathI. mamatA rAkha, paNa nATakI mamatA rAkha, nATakamAM mamatA nathI rAkhatA badhA ?! bhartuhari rAjA AvyA, piMgaLA rANI AvI, bhartuhari raDe, paNa badhuM nATakI. eTale emAM baMdhana ja nahIM. nATaka karo badhuM. khAva, pIo, badhuM paNa nATakI ! ame nATaka ja karIe chIe ne ? praznakartA : A kALamAM nATakI mamatAvALo maLe ? dAdAzrI : nATakI mamatA to hoya nahIM ne ! bAkI ame nATaka ja karIe chIe ne ! ame kevI hIrAbAnI khabara rAkhIe chIe. ane paMdara dahADe eka phero hIrAbA che te bhANAbhAIne kahe, 'Aje kahejo jamavA Ave dAdA." eTale amAre javuM ja paDe. game eTaluM kAma hoya to badhuM kADhI nAkhavuM paDe. emane rAjI rAkhavA paDe. e ciDhAya to ApaNI AbarU gaI. A thoDI ghaNI AbarU rahI che te jatI rahe. paNa e ciDhAya evuM meM rAkhyuM ja nathI. eTale ame hIrAbAne tyAM jaIne jamI AvIe chIe. hIrAbA kahe, kAle jamavA Avajo.' to pAchA ame tyAM jaIe chIe. badhA loko kahe, 'dAdA, Aja jamavA AvyA hatA." paNa kevuM nATaka karyuM ! hIrAbA e nA jANe ke A nATaka kare che, toya huM kahuM ke 'tamArA vagara mane gamatuM nathI.' e nA jANe ke A nATaka kare che, A to tamane kahuM chuM. praznakartA : paNa mamatA ema kema nIkaLe ? dAdAzrI : tamAre A "jJAna" pachI mamatA gaI che. have ene kyAM kADhavI che pAchI ? benI sahiyArI dukAna hatI, 'tamArI' ne

Page #129
AptavANI-9 207 bhogavaTo, paNa mamatA vagara ! A tame ahIM be divasa mATe rahevA AvyA, te A palaMga, khurazI, gAdalAM badhI cIja bhogavavAnI kharI. bhogavavAno vAMdho nathI, paNa mamatArahita bhogavavAnuM. enuM nAma ja bhogavaTo kahevAya. eTale tame A mamatArahita bhogavaTo karo ke A to mAruM nhoya. have gharadhaNIneya A badhuM enuM nathI, e jo samajAya to pachI ene mamatArahita bhogavaTo kevo suMdara hoya ! tethI pachI Ama sarasa Tipoya hoya ne koIka chokaruM upara kahyuM ane Tipoya besI gaI, to ene mahIM besI nA jAya. eTale A badhuM 'jJAnI puruSa' pAse samajavAnI jarUra che. nahIM to anaMta avatArathI bhaTake che, bhaTakavAmAM bAkI rAkhyuM nathI. paNa senTrala sTezana AvyuM nathI. ahIM 'jJAnI puruSa' maLyA eTale chelve sTezana AvI gayuM. tene mokSa maLe ! have A 'senTrala' sTezana ja che. ahIMthI pharI AgaLa javAnuM nahIM, pharI musApharI karavAnI nahIM. kazI upAdhi nahIM. Adhi nahIM, vyAdhi nahIM, kazuM nahIM, nahIM to A dareka sTezane to bhaTakavAnuM ja che ne ! ne bhaTaka bhaTaka ja kare che, AmathI Ama bhaTake ne AmathI Ama bhaTake che. kAraNa ke ene A lAlaco che 'A joIe che, te joIe che." bhagavAna to kahe che ke, 'tArI lAlaca pUrI thAya to mArI pAse Ava, mArA Azraye AvI jA. to tuM ne huM eka ja chIe." paNa ene potAne A lAlaco che ne lAlaco che tethI bhaTakAmaNa UbhI rahI che. bAkI A jagatamAM lAlaca nA rAkhe e mokSa enI meLe khoLI ja kADhe. jo lAlaca baMdhAya nahIM, to mokSa khoLI ja kADhe. A to lAlacathI ja A jagata badhuM bhaTakayA kare che, ane lAlacathI bhayaMkara duHkho bhogave che. eka bhAI ahIM AvelA. emane meM kahyuM, 'lAlaca che ke ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'lAlaca bilakula rAkhI nathI.' meM kahyuM, 'bahu sarasa 208 AptavANI-9 eDajasTamenTa kahevAya.' jeNe lAlaca jiMdagImAMya karelI nathI, tyAre e bhagavAna sudhI pahoMcI zake. lAlacamAM, niyama paNa nahIM ! praznakartA : lAlaca eka prakAranI hoya ke aneka prakAranI hoya ? dAdAzrI : eka prakAranI lAlaca hoya teno vAMdho nahIM. ene eka prakArano lobhI kahevAya che. praznakartA : paNa A lAlaca Apa je kaho cho, e eka prakAranI hoya ? dAdAzrI : nA, badhI jAtanI lAlaca. jyAMthI ne tyAMthI sukha joIe. praznakartA : bhrAMtinuM sukha ? dAdAzrI : hA, te ja to, bIjuM zuM ? niyama nA hoya koI. viSaya ekalAnI lAlaca hoya to vAMdho nathI. e lobha kahevAya. bIjA badhAmAM lAlaca nathI ne ? nA. jyAre lAlacu mANasane badhI lAlaca hoya, tamAma prakAranI lAlaca hoya. lAlaca to dhyeya cUkAve ! kUtarAne eka pUrI dekhADIene, emAM to enI badhI 'phemIlI'ne paNa bhUlI jAya. chokarAM, kurakuriyAM, badhAMyane bhUlI jAya ane AkhuM potAnuM sthAna che, je lattAmAM raheto hoya teya bhUlI jAya ane kyAMya jaIne Ubho rahe che. lAlacanI hAru pUMchaDI paTapaTAvato hoya, eka pUrIne mATe ! lAlaca, jeno huM 'sTroMga' virodhI chuM. lokomAM huM lAlaca dekhuM tyAre mane thAya, AvI lAlaca badhI ?! 'opana poIjhana' che ! maLI Ave e khAvuM. paNa lAlaca nA hovI joIe. praznakartA : lAlaca vagara rahevAthI maLI paNa rahe che. dAdAzrI : eTale A lAlacane ja A bhAMjagaDa che. nahIM to badhuM maLI rahe, ghera beThAM maLe. A ame kazI icchA paNa nathI karatAM toya

Page #130
AptavANI-9 badhI cIja maLe che ne ! lAlaca to nathI, paNa icchAye nathI karatA ! praznakartA : lAlaca ane icchA e bemAM zo phera ? 209 dAdAzrI : icchA rAkhavAnI chUTa che badhAne, badhIya jAtanI. icchAno vAMdho nathI. lAlacu to, A kUtarAne eka pUrI dharI te kyAMno kyAM jAya, ene lAlaca peDhI ne ! praznakartA : eTale lAlacamAM sArA narasAno viveka nahIM raheto hoya ? dAdAzrI : lAlaca to, jAnavara ja kahI do ne ene ! manuSyarUpe jAnavara ja pharyA kare che. praznakartA : to amArI dharmakriyAo lAlaca ne pratiSThA ne kIrtine lIdhe hoya to enuM phaLa zuM ? dAdAzrI : e lAlaca nA kahevAya. kIrtine mATe, e to svabhAvika rahe mANasane. saMsAramAM che eTale nAma kADhavAnI icchA hoya, bIjI icchA hoya. e kaMI lAlaca nA kahevAya. lAlaca to A kUtarAM jevuM hoya. eka pUrI dekhAI ne, eTale pAchaLa bhamyA ja kare. ene bhAneya nA rahe ke A mArAM bairAM-chokarAM choDI dIdhAM ne A lattoya choDI dIdho. kazuM bhAna nahIM. thoDI ghaNI lAlaca to badhAne hoya, paNa e lAlaca nabhAvI levAnI. paNa lAlacu ja jene kahevAmAM Ave che, ene to kaMI jAnavara ja joI lo ne, manuSyarUpe ! eka mANasane, koI khAvAnI sarasa UMcI vastu lAvyA. have pelA mANasane e vastu bahu ja bhAve che, to e lAlaca sAru besI rahe. be, traNa, cAra kalAka besI rahe. thoDuMka ene ApIe tyAra pachI ja e jaze. paNa e lAlaca sAru besI rahe che. ane je ahaMkArI che e to kahe, 'mela paiDa tArI, enA karatAM ApaNA ghera javA do ne !' e lAlacu nA hoya. eTale lAlacothI A jagata baMdhAyeluM che. alyA, kUtarAM gadheDAMne lAlaca hoya. paNa ApaNane lAlaca kema hoya ? lAlaca te hotI haze ?! 210 AptavANI-9 A uMdara pAMjarAmAM kyAre Ave che ? pAMjarAmAM kyAre jhaDapAI jAya che ? praznakartA : lAlaca hoya tyAre. dAdAzrI : hA, DhebarAnI sugaMdha AvI ane DhebaruM khAvA gayo ke mahIM tarata phasAya. pAMjarAnI mahIM DhebaruM dekhyuM te bahAra rahyo e talapApaDa thayA kare ke 'kyAre pesuM ? kyAre pesuM ?" pachI mahIM pesI jAya eTale peluM 'oTomeTika, vasAI jAya. manuSyone A 'oTomeTika' AvaDe badhuM. eTale enI meLe ja vasAI jAya. eTale sarva duHkhanuM mULa lAlaca che. jokhamI, lobha ke lAlaca ? praznakartA : lAlaca koNa karAve ? mana karAve ? dAdAzrI : mana karAve, paNa mULa to ahaMkArano ja guNa ne ! gayA avatAranI lAlaco mananI mAraphate nIkaLe, ane pAchuM A ahaMkArathI pharI lAlaco UbhI thayA kare. praznakartA H A lAlaca kyA kaSAyamAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : lAlaca, e rAga kaSAya che. rAga ane kapaTa, e be bheguM thAya eTale lAlaca UbhI thAya. praznakartA : e mohamAM paNa Ave ne, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e je gaNo te, paNa lAlaca zabda judo che. praznakartA : kapaTa jevI hoya, lAlaca ? dAdAzrI : kapaTeya nahIM A to. A to lAlacu ja badhuM. kapaTa to tamane ya AvaDe. A to lAlacu ! lAlacamAM mukhyapaNe to lobha hoya. praznakartA : e lobha dhIre dhIre lAlacu banAvI nAkhe ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. e lAlaca thayA pachI ja lobha utpanna thAya.

Page #131
AptavANI-9 2 11 lobhiyAno vAMdho nahIM. to ya lobhiyo koI dahADo jIte. paNa lAlacu nA jIte. lobhiyA karatAMya lAlacu bahu bhAre hoya. lobhiyo sAro ke dhUtArA bhUkheya nA maravA de. dhUtArA bhUkhyA koNa rAkhe ? bIjAM badhAM maravA de. paNa A lobhiyo nA maravA de. praznakartA: to lobhiyAmAM ne lAlacamAM phera zo che ? dAdAzrI : lAlacu to badhAmAM lAlacu ! lobhiyo to, tene lobha eka ja bAbatamAM. paisA ekalAmAM ja lobha ! ane paisAnA aMge, jemAMthI paisA prApta thAya e vastuono lobha ! jyAre A lAlacune to je AvyuM te ! jarA bhAMga Ave ne to ya lAlaca, gAMjo Ave to ya lAlaca !! jemAM ne temAM sukha le, bhogavI levAnI lAlaca !! lAlacu mANasa vakare eTale trAgAM kare. 'huM marI jaIza, Ama karIza ke ApaghAta karIza" ema bIvaDAvI mArIne bhogavI levA phare, ne vakare pAcho. praznakartA : tyAM ene kaI lAlaca che ke jethI e vakare che ? dAdAzrI : sukha bhogavI levAnI. pelAM bhogavavA nA detAM hoya te AvuM vakare ke 'ApaghAta karIza, huM to Ama karIza." praznakartA : lAlaca khAsa karIne viSaya mATe hoya ? dAdAzrI : viSaya mATe, ne bIjAM badhAM mATe ya hoya. praznakartA: eTale bIjuM, mAna, pUjAvAnI kAmanA evuM badhuM paNa kharuM? dAdAzrI: hA, eya hoya. ane dArU bahu nA pIvA de, to ya AvuM kare. praznakartA : lAlaca vastunI hoya ke vastumAMthI AvatA sukhanI hoya ? dAdAzrI : sukhanuM ja che ne ! " vastunuM nahIM. vastune to zuM karavAnuM ! vastumAMthI AvatA sukhanI lAlaca che. praznakartA : lobhiyAne paNa evuM ja hoya ne ? 212 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : lobhiyo sAro, lobha to ene amuka ja jAtano hoya. bIjI kaMI bhAMjagaDa nahIM. ene to strInI bhAMjagaDa ghaNA phero hotI ya nathI, bIjAM sukhonI ya bhAMjagaDa nathI hotI. A lobhanI ekalI ja bhAMjagaDa ! praznakartA : lobhiyA ane lAlacamAM bhAre konuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : lAlacanuM ! lAlacune to chUTavAno vAro ya nA Ave. sIdhA mANasone AvI tevI DiphikalTIo nathI AvatI. jyAre lAlaca mANasane apamAna bharelI 'lAIpha' rahevAnI. praznakartA : to ya ene apamAnanuM duHkha nA lAge ? dAdAzrI : evuM lAge to to e lAlacu rahe nahIM ne ! vadhu lAlacane naphaphaTa kahe loka ! praznakartA : eTale jene mAnanI paDelI hoya to tene lAlacanI paDelI nA hoya ? dAdAzrI : mAnanI paDelI hoya to tene avaguNo bahu pese nahIM. apamAnanA bhayathI ja nA pese. praznakartA : paNa mAnanI lAlaca pesI jAya to ? dAdAzrI : hA, eya lAlaca hoya che. e ja lAlaca ! ene mAnanI bhIkha kahIe chIe ame. praznakartA : paNa lobhiyo e paNa lAlacu hoI zake ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. lobhiyAmAM ne lAlacamAM bahu 'Dipharansa' ! lobhiyo eTale lobhiyo ne lAlacu eTale lAlacu ! lobhiyo bebhAna nA hoya, lAlacu bebhAna hoya. lAlacu to potAnuM ahita ja karyA kare, niraMtara ahita karyA kare. praznakartA : ene potAne ema khabara paDatI hoya ke A huM ahita karuM chuM ?

Page #132
AptavANI-9 213 dAdAzrI : nA, e khabara ja nA hoya ne ! bhAna ja nA hoya ne !! eTale koI dahADoya lobhiyo chUTe. sahuthI pahelo chUTe koNa ? mAnI. eTale krodhavALo. krodha ne mAnavALo e sahuthI vahelo chUTe. kAraNa ke beu bhoLAM hoya. raste jatAM ya koI kahe ke zuM moTAM chAtI kADhIne pharo cho ?! paNa pelA lobhIne to potAne ya khabara nA hoya ke mArAmAM lobha che. eTalo badho UMDo vyavahAra hoya ke dhaNIne ya khabara nA hoya ke mane lobha che. e to amAre dekhADavo paDe ! praznakartA : lobha eTalo UMDo hoya, eTale e jaldI na chUTe ? dAdAzrI : hA, te nA chUTe jaldI. bahu tela kADhI nAkhe. to ya paNa lobhiyo niyamavALo hoya. jyAre lAlacune to niyama ja nA hoya. lAlacane koI niyama nahIM. e "jJAnI'nI AjJA ja nA pALe ne ! pALavI hoya to ya pALI zakAya ja nahIM. praznakartA : paNa "jJAnI" pratye bhAva bahu hoya, to enuM zuM? dAdAzrI : bhAva hoya, to ya bhalIvAra nA Ave ne ! eTale lobhiyo chUTe, paNa lAlacu nA chUTe. A "jJAna" pachI thoDo lobhe ya jIvato rahe che ane lAlace ya jIvaMta rahe che. paNa lAlacune "sepha sAIDa' nahIM. e 'sepha sAIDa lobhiyAne thaI jAya, paNa lAlacane sepha sAIDa' thAya nahIM, meM evuM ghaNI jagyAe joyeluM. moTo lobhiyo hoya ne, te "jJAnI'nI AjJA pALI zake nahIM. te ya paNa vakhate 'jJAnI"nI AjJA pALe. paNa lAlacu, e 'jJAnI'nI AjJA nA pALe. A badhAM 'Dipharansa' 'bITavIna' lobhiyo ane lAlacu ! lAlaca ApaghAtI mANasa hoya. potAno ghAta karI rahyo che, niraMtara potAno ApaghAta karI rahyo che ! jayAM tyAMthI sukhatI ja lAlaca ! praznakartA : lAlacamAM bIjuM zuM zuM Ave ? 214 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : lAlacamAM badhuM ya Ave ne ! praznakartA : paNa e kevA prakAranI lAlaca hoya ? dAdAzrI : badhAM prakAranI lAlaca ! koI bAkI ja nA hoya ne !! praznakartA : dAkhalo ApIne samajAvo ne. dAdAzrI : e to badhAM samaje che. mAra khAvAnI lAlaca koIne hoya? gALo khAvAnI lAlaca hoya ? kevA prakAranI lAlaca te nA samaje badhA ya ? A bhogavI lauM, peluM bhogavI lauM, phalANuM bhogavI lauM, e je lAlaca. praznakartA : paNa e lAlaca kyA AdhAre UbhI rahe ? dAdAzrI : sukha cAkhavAnA AdhAre ! jayAMthI tyAMthI sukha cAkhI levuM. dhyeya ke kazuM nahIM. mAna-apamAneya nahIM, kazuM ya nahIM. naphaphaTa thaIne sukha cAkhavuM. koI kAyado ya nahIM. praznakartA : to evI lAlaconuM kAraNa zuM ? kaI rIte A lAlaco Ave che ? dAdAzrI : jemAM ne temAMthI sukha prApta karavuM, ne jenuM ne tenuM paDAvI levuM. eTale pachI 'laoN', kAyado ke kazuM nahIM. ane te lokaniMdya hoya to ya kazI paDelI nA hoya ane te lokaniMdya ja hoya A badhuM. eTale pachI lAlaca AvAM kAma karAve. mANasane mANasajAtamAM nA rAkhe. praznakartA : eTale lAlacamAM ene kevA bhAva UbhA thAya ? dAdAzrI : je kaMI maLe tenI lAlaca thAya. lAlaca eTale bhautikamAM Akho dahADo sukha khoLa khoLa karyA kare. praznakartA : game te bhoge bhautika sukha levAnuM? dAdAzrI : hA, basa. ApaNuM 'jJAna" lIdhelA mahAtmAo evuM sukha khoLe nahIM. e to 'phAIlono samabhAve nikAla kare. AvI paDeluM hoya

Page #133
AptavANI-9 teno nikAla kare, paNa khoLe nahIM. koI bhavamAM lAlaca gaI nathI, tethI ja A badhuM duHkhane ! ane duHkhe ya anaMta avatAra maLe, sukha koI kALe nA maLe. lAlaca e duHkhanuM ja kAraNa che. sukhano dharAvo ye nA Ave koI dahADo ya. A eka avatAranI lAlaca hoya nahIM mANasane, keTalAya avatAranI lAlaca hoya. paNa have A eka avatAramAM e lAlaca toDI nAkhe to pAMsaruM thaI jAya. eTale lAlaca guNa jyAM sudhI chUTe nahIM tyAM sudhI jokhama tUTe nahIM. 215 ApaNuM 'jJAna' zuM kahe che ? jagatamAM bhogavavA jevuM che zuM ? tuM amatho AnI mahIM phAMphA mAre che. bhogavavA jevo to AtmA che ! praznakartA : emAM sukha je raheluM che evuM bIje kyAMye sukha che ja nahIM. dAdAzrI : bIje sukha hotuM haze ?! badhuM kalpita che e sukha to. ApaNe sukha kalpIe to sukha lAge. eka jaNa kahe che, mane jalebI bahu bhAve che ane eka jaNa kahe, mane jalebI dekhuM chuM ne cItarI caDhe che. eTale e sukha kalpelAM badhAM. jagata AkhuM sonAno svIkAra kare ane 'jJAnI puruSa' eno svIkAra nA kare agara to jainanA sAdhuo ya sonAno svIkAra nA kare. jagatanA lokoe viSayamAM sukha kahyuM. viSaya eTale naryo gaMdavADo, emAM sukha te hotuM haze ? viSayatI lAlaya, kevI hIta dazA ! praznakartA : have A viSayamAM sukha lIdhuM, enA pariNAme pelA jhaghaDA ne kleza badhuM thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : badhuM A viSayamAMthI ja UbhuM thayuM che ane sukha kazuMya nahIM pAchuM. savAranA pahoramAM divela pIdhA jevuM moDhuM hoya. jANe divela pIdheluM nA hoya ?! AptavANI-9 praznakartA : e to kaMpArI chUTe ke ATalAM badhA duHkho A loko sahana kare che ATalA sukhane mATe ! 216 dAdAzrI : e ja lAlaca che ne, A viSaya bhogavavAnI ! pachI e to narkagatinuM duHkha tyAM bhogave ne, tyAre khabara paDe ke zuM svAda cAkhavAno che AmAM !! ne viSayanI lAlaca e to jAnavara ja kahI do ne ! viSayamAM ghRNA utpanna thAya to ja viSaya baMdha thAya. nahIM to viSaya zI rIte baMdha thAya ? tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ke, thUMkavAnuM ye nA game. praznakartA : A badhI vastuomAM doSa Ubho thAya, te jAgRti na hovAthI ja Ubho thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : lAlaca hoya to jAgRti rahe nahIM. mULa lAlaca ja hoya che. praznakartA : to pachI lAlaca kADhavA zuM puruSArtha kare ? mAre viSaya na joIe, evuM ? dAdAzrI : e to vAta samaje eka vAra, viSayane jo sArI rIte samajI le to ! e viSaya to AMkhane nA game evo che, kAnane sAMbhaLavAno nA game evo che, nAkane soDavAno nA game evo che, jIbhane cATavAno nA game evo che. pAMceya indriya nAkhuza thaI jAya, pAMceya indriyone game nahIM, ema badhI ja rIte phoDa pADIne samajavuM paDe. mananeya gamatuM nathI, buddhineya gamatuM nathI, ahaMkAraneya gamatuM nathI, chatAMya zI rIte coMTyo che te ja samajAtuM nathI. praznakartA : emAM kSaNika sukha dekhAtuM hoya ne ! dAdAzrI : nA. kSaNika sukhano savAla nathI. paNa A badhAM laukika rIte ja coMTelA che ne ! jemAM koI indriyo kabUla karatI nathI. jalebIno vAMdho nathI. jalebI viSaya che paNa eno vAMdho nathI. e AMkhane dekhavI game. ene bhAMgIe to saMbhaLAya. eTale kAnane game. nAkane sugaMdhI game. jIbhaneya

Page #134
AptavANI-9 217 eno svAda game. hAtheya aDADIe to Ama sarasa lAge, teya game. mATe ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ke jalebI khAva. kAraNa ke A indriyo kabUla karatI hoya to khAva. paNa A viSayamAM to indriyo soDe ne, to traNa dahADA sudhI khAvAnuM nA bhAve. lAlacane to koI baI viSaya nA Ape ne, to ene "bA" kahe, evA bebhAna mANaso che ! mAruM zuM kahevAnuM ke Atmasukha cAkhyA pachI pelA sukhanI jarUra ja kyAM rahI ?! bAkI, viSaya eTale naryo gaMdavADo, gaMdavADo ne gaMdavADo ! A to DhAMkyo gaMdavADo !! A cAdara khaseDI nAkhe ne, A poTaluM choDe ne, cAdara choDI nAkhe ne, to khabara paDe. badhuM bhopALo ! e samajaNa yAda nahIM rahevAthI, enuM bhAna nahIM rahevAthI ja A veSa che ne ! ne lAlacu to zuM kare ? pelIne ahIM hAthe paruM nIkaLyuM hoya, ne te A bahu lAlace caDhyo hoya ne pelI kahe, 'cATI jA." to e cATI jAya. kUtarAM ya je cATe nahIM, ene A cATI jAya. e lAlacu kahevAya. toya ene aham nA jAge. aham jAge nahIM ke, 'A kema thAya ? mela paiDa, mAre nathI joItuM.' A lAlaca to mArI nAkhe mANasane. kAyado che ke DuMgaLI bahu khAnAra hoya ne, ene DuMgaLIno ahIM Dhagalo hoya ne, toya gaMdha nA Ave. ane DuMgaLI khAto nA hoya ne, to trIjA rUmamAM be DuMgaLInAM kAMkarA paDyA hoya to ahIM ene gaMdhAya, eTale lAlacane bebhAnapaNuM AvI rIte thaI jAya. viSaya eTale to pAzavatA ! viSaya e to pAzavatAnI nizAnI kahevAya. e kaMI manuSyapaNAnI nizAnI che ?! viSaya to eka-be chokarAM thAya eTalAM pUratuM ja hoya. pachI viSaya hoto haze mANasane ? enAthI ja athaDAmaNa ! praznakartA : viSayanI lAlacamAM pote saphaLa na thAya tyAre zaMkA ne e badhuM pachI kare che ne ? dAdAzrI : saphaLa nA thAya eTale badhuMya kare. zaMkAo kare, kuzaMkAo kare badhI. badhI jAtanA veza kare e pachI. yA allAha paravaradigAra thAya 2 18 AptavANI-9 pachI ! eka lAlaca hI thAya pachI. paNa e ja ene pAchuM phajeta kare te juduM. enA kabajAmAM gayA eTale phajeta karyA vagara rahe nahIM ne ! | 'vAIpha' joDe mana-vacana-kAyAthI koI saMbaMdha ja nathI ane dhaNIpaNuM kare, e nA thavuM joIe. dhaNIpaNuM to kyAre kahevAya ? manavacana-kAyAthI pAzavatAno saMbaMdha hoya tyAM sudhI dhaNIpaNuM kahevAya. praznakartA : paNa viSaya hoya to ja dhaNIpaNuM karato hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : dhaNIpaNuM eTale zuM ke dabaDAvIne bhogavavuM. paNa pachI AvatA bhavano hisAba AvI jAya ne ?! praznakartA : e zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : vera baMdhAya ! koI AtmA dabAyelo raheto haze ghaDIvAra ? bahu athaDAmaNa thAya ne, pachI kaheze, "moTuM tobaro jevuM laIne zuM pharo cho ? te tobaro pachI vadhAre caDhe. pachI e rIsa rAkhe. pelI kahe, mArA ghATamAM Ave tyAre huM enuM tela kADhIza." te rIsa rAkhyA vagara rahe nahIM ne ! A jIvamAtra rIsa rAkhe, tame chaMcheDo eTalI vAra ! koI koIno dabAyelo nathI. koI koIne levAdevA nathI. A to badhuM bhrAMtithI mAruM dekhAya che, mAruM-tAruM ! A to nAchuTake samAjanI AbarUne lIdhe Ama dhaNInA dabAyelA rahe. paNa pachI Avate bhava tela kADhI nAkhe. are, sApaNa thaIne keDe hala ! te lAlacamAMthI lAcArImAM ! eka strI enA dhaNIne cAra vakhata sASTAMga karAvaDAve tyAre eka vakhata eDavA de ! tyAre enA karatAM A dariyAmAM samAdhi leto hoya te zuM khoTuM ? zA sAruM A cAra vakhata sASTAMga ?! praznakartA : AmAM strI zAthI AvuM kare che ? dAdAzrI : e eka prakArano ahaMkAra che.

Page #135
AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 219 praznakartA: paNa ene pachI zuM phaLa maLe? dAdAzrI : kazo phAyado nahIM. paNa Ama ahaMkAra ke "joyuM ne, A kevo sIdho karI nAkhyo !" ane pelo bicAro lAlacathI kareya evuM ! paNa strIne pachI phaLa bhogavavuM to paDe ne ? praznakartA : emAM strIpaNAne bacAva kare che pote ? dAdAzrI : nA. strIpaNAno bacAva nahIM, e ahaMkAra ja ropha mAre che. te pelAne mAMkaDAnI peTha nacAve. pachI enAM 'rIekazana' to Ave ne ? pelo ya vera rAkhe pachI ke huM tArA lAgamAM Avyo, tyAre te mAro viSa karyo ne mArI AbarU lIdhI. tuM lAgamAM Ave eTalI vAra che !" te pachI laI le AbarU, ghaDIvAramAM dhULadhANI karI nAkhe pachI. lAlaputo sparza bagADe saMskAra ! nAnA chokarA chokarI hoya che, ene lAlacu mANasathI Ama aDAya paNa nahIM. nahIM to e lAlacu mANasano hAtha aDe ne, to e nAnI chokarInA saMskAra kharAba paDI jAya. nAno chokaro hoya to ya enA saMskAra kharAba paDI jAya. mATe e hAtha nA aDe to sAruM. kAraNa ke e lAlacu galIpacI sAruM to bolAve ene, hamaNe sAme kALAM dekhAtAM chokarAM hoya, nA game tevAM hoya to e bolAve nahIM. A to gulAbanAM phUla jevI eTale ene bolAve. te ya galIpacI sAru. e galIpacI, emAM kaMI ocho viSaya che ? paNa nA aDe tyAM sudhI uttama ! kAraNa ke lAlacanuM mana to tyAM ja jAya pAchuM. AkarSaNa kaMI viSayanuM ekalAnuM ja hoya ? jo ke ahIMya viSaya vastuno che nahIM, paNa AkarSaNa hoya. enAM karatAM apavitra nA thAya e sAruM. 220 praznakartA : lAlaca eTale dekhatAM ja galagaliyAM thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : galagaliyAM to kharekharAM thAya. paNa A lAlaca che evuM oLakhAya toya sAruM ! koIne dekhe to tarata e lAlacunA manamAM ema thAya ke "cAlo, Aje joDe jaIne khAIzuM.' e lAlaca te ghaDIe ApaNe zuM karavuM joIe ? meM to hamaNAM ja khAdhuM hatuM. have nahIM phAve.' svamAna jevuM hovuM joIe ne ? loka to ApaNane khavaDAve, paNa manamAM rahe ne ! ochuM kaMI mananA copaDAmAM bheMsAI jAya che ? eTale pelo bhego thAya ke vicAra to Ave ne, ke A khavaDAve to sAruM ? paNa e vicArane pheravavA e ApaNuM kAma ! pheravavo e ApaNo puruSArtha kahevAya. ene nahIM pheravavAnA jokhamadAra ApaNe. je vicAra pheravyA, e vicAranA ApaNe jokhamadAra nahIM. ane vicAra nA pheravyA to e vicAranA ApaNe jokhamadAra thayA ! praznakartA : have khAvAnI cokhkhI nA pADI dIdhI, to e pelAnA bhAvane tarachoDa mArI nA kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : zAnI tarachoDa kahevAya ? e to koI kaheze ke 'heMDo, bahAra dArU pIvA.' to ? emAM zAnI tarachoDa ? AvA polAM bahAnAM zuM karavA khoLo cho ? e kahe to ApaNe jaIe ne nA khAvuM hoya to ApaNe Ama laIne AmathI Ama nAkhI daIe. badhuya AvaDe. Ama cAMpa dabAvIne calAvI levAnuM. kaMI nA AvaDe evuM ochuM che ? eka ja vastu khAtA hoya to ya paNa vAMdho nahIM ne ! ene bIjI koI lAlaca nahIM ne !! eTalI eka ja lAlacamAM ramyA kare, basa. eka upara AvI jAya to ya vAMdho nahIM ne ! A lAlacu to jenI ne tenI lAlacamAM paDyA hoya ! eTale pachI eNe jyAM jyAM cora pesI jAya ne, tyAM tyAM vADa ghAlI devI paDe. lAlaca to bahu jherI vastu che. lAlaca to eka 'limiTa' pUratI hoya, ekAda. eno vAMdho nahIM. lAlaya vahore jokhamo ja ! praznakartA : koI eka lAlaca ke je 'ekasTrIma' che, e ja ene e ja puruSArtha ! bAkI lAlaca kaMI ekalA viSayanI hoya che ? badhI lAlaca ! khAvAnI-pIvAnI badhI lAlaco ja che ne ! kaMI paNa khAvAno vAMdho nahIM, paNa lAlaca nA hovI joIe.

Page #136
AptavANI-9 phasAve che ? dAdAzrI : hA, evuM bane ne ! korTamAM jokhamadArIvALI tArIkha hoya to ya paNa lAlacanI jagyA AvI gaI, lAlaca prApta thAya evI jagyA maLI gaI, to e korTeya choDI de. eTale jokhama badhuM ore. praznakartA : e mANasane bahu bejavAbadAra mANasa kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : bejavAbadAra nA kahevAya, paNa bahu vadhAre javAbadArIvALo kahevAya ! lAlacamAM ja zUro hoya eTale bahu javAbadArI hore. lAlayatI najara ja bhogamAM paNa lAlacu eTale saba baMdarake mAlika. e to pachI badhAya baMdara para enI 'sTImara' UbhI rahe. ane je potAno mAla hoya, eno vepArI potAno bhego thAya evo kAyado che ! praznakartA : paNa e to najara ja tyAM hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. najara uparathI nahIM. kAyado ja evo che. kAraNa ke ApaNe moDhethI davA pIe ne, te kyAM jaze ? jyAM AgaLa du:khe che tyAM ja jAya. A moDhethI, jyAM du:khe che tyAM AgaLa davA zI rIte gaI ? e kAyadA che, AkarSaNa che tyAM. eTale ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ? darda davAne AkarSaNa kare che, nahIM ke davA dardane sapaDAve che. eTale darda ja davAne AkarSaNa kare che. bajAramAM koI jagyAe zIzI nA maLatI hoya, te zIzI ahIM AvIne UbhI rahe. ane pachI kahe, "A davA koI jagyAe maLatI nahotI. A eka ja maLI. hatI eka ja enI pAse." meM kahyuM, 'hA, huM samajI gayo. tArA kahevA sivAya huM samajI gayo !" AtI lAlaca zI che ? praznakartA : evuM kharuM ke lAlacane nokarI-dhaMdho karavAnuM mana nA thAya, lAlacane lIdhe ? dAdAzrI : e maLe ya nahIM ne mana paNa nA thAya. 222 AptavANI-9 have loka to navI navI lAlaca dekhADe tyAre manamAM thAya ke A keLuM laI jauM ke lUma laI jauM ?! jyAre kaMIka kharI mahenata karIne kamAvI lAvyo hoya, paNa e kamANI javAnI thAya tyAre AvuM lAlacavALuM ApaNane bheguM thAya. loka to lAlaco dekhADe, paNa potAne lAlaca UbhI thaI ke muzkelImAM mUkAI jAya. bAkI, ApaNe to evo dhaMdho karIe ke je ApaNane 'helpa' Ape. ApaNI prakRtimAM je dhaMdhA che eTalA ja dhaMdhA karIe to ja ApaNane vaLe. paNa prakRtimAM khAlI AbhAsa mAtra dekhAtA hoya evA dhaMdhAo karavA jaIe ne, temAM ja mAryA jAya ! prakRtimAM paNa AbhAsa jevA dhaMdhA hoya. koIke kahyuM ke tarata mahIM lAlacanA mAryA coMTI paDavAnuM mana thAya. e badhuM AbhAsa jevuM kahevAya. amane evuM baneluM. ame A badhA AbhAsI dhaMdhA joyelA. A saMsAranI AzA rAkhIe, lAlaca rAkhIe ke nA rAkhIe to ke tenuM te ja phaLa AvavAnuM che. AnI lAlaca zI te ? nAzavaMta cIjo che. tame Thokara mArazo to ye e pAchuM Avaze. ane nahIM to tame 'Ava, Ava' karazo to ye nahIM Ave. kAraNa ke e badhuM 'mikenikala' che ! svacchaMda, aTakaNa ne lAlaca ! A to haju lAlaca rahI gaI che ne, e lAlaca mArI nAkhe potAne ! eTale ame cetavaNI Apa Apa karIe ke ceto, ceto. bAkI, bahu majabUta mANasa hoya, paNa AgaLa AvI zake nahIM ne ! praznakartA : paNa e to lAlaca nIkaLI jAya to pachI AgaLa AvI zake ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa lAlaca ja nA nIkaLe, baLI ! e lAlacane kADhatAM to bahu TAIma jAya e to.. praznakartA : svachaMdI ane lAlacamAM zuM phera ? dAdAzrI : svachaMdIno vAMdho nahIM. svachaMdI to hoya, paNa lAlacano bahu vAMdho.

Page #137
AptavANI-9 223 praznakartA : Apa aTakaNa kaho cho e ane lAlaca, e be eka ja pariNAmI vastu che ? dAdAzrI : aTakaNa judI vastu che. aTakaNa to nIkaLI zake che. aTakaNo badhI hoya ja dareka mANasane, paNa nIkaLI zake. ApaNAM ahIM aTakaNavALA badhAM bahu che ne ! chatAM niraMtara e mArI AjJAmAM ja rahe evAM ye che. aTakaNano vAMdho nahIM. aTakaNa to bhAMge koIka dahADo. paNa A lAlacu to AjJAmAM ja nA rahI zake ne ! kAraNa ke lAlacanI jagyA Ave ne, tyAM e pote ja bhamI jAya. jAgRti tyAM AgaLa rahe nahIM. lAlacatI graMthi ! praznakartA : e lAlaco janmajAta vastu che ke saMgathI utpanna thayelI che ? dAdAzrI : janmyo tyArathI ja e graMthi badhI AvI paDelI che. praznakartA : to A lAlaca che e A janmanI che ke AgalA janmanI che ? dAdAzrI : e to AgaLanA ja janmanI che ne ! paNa A janmamAM ya haju to bhamI jAya che. eTale te ghaDIe bhamI nA jAya tyAre lAlaca chUTI paDe. paNa bhamI nA jAya evuM bane nahIM ne ! lAlaca to bahu kharAbamAM kharAba cIja che. have marI jAya to ja lAlaca jAya. paNa e lAlacanuM bIja hoya, tethI pharI ene lIdhe bIje avatAra pAchI lAlaca UbhI thAya. bAkI, lAlaca jAya nahIM. lAlaca to mANasane mArI nAkhe, paNa jAya nahIM. lAlaca to ajJAnatAnI nizAnI che. evo nizcaya choDAve lAlaco ! eTale 'koI vastu nA khape' evuM nakkI karyuM, tyArathI lAlaca zabda ja UDI jAya. nahIM to lAlaca ja jokhama ne ! kriyA e jokhama nathI, lAlaca jokhama che. 'koI paNa vastu nA khape', pachI ApaNe laIe e 224 AptavANI-9 vAta judI che. bAkI, ApaNane lAlaca hoya nahIM. lAlaca to narke laI jAya ane jJAna pacavA nA de. praznakartA : A 'jJAna' pachI paNa A lAlaco badhI rahevAnI kharI ? dAdAzrI : ko'kane rahe. praznakartA : ene A lAlacomAMthI chUTavuM hoya to te zI rIte chUTe ? dAdAzrI : e jo eno nizcaya kare to badhuM chUTe. lAlacathI chUTavuM to joIe ja ne. potAnAM hitane mATe che ne ! nizcaya karyA pachI, chUTyA pachI pelI bAju sukha ja lAgaze. e to vadhAre sukha lAgaze, nirAMta lAgaze UlaTI. A to ene bhaya che ke A sukha mAruM jatuM rahe. paNa e chUTyA pachI to vadhAre sukha lAgaze. praznakartA : paNa e bhaya nIkaLe nahIM tyAM sudhI pelo lAbha thAya nahIM ne ? pelo bhaya che ene eTale A bAju nizcaya tyAM sudhI thavA nA de ne, ene ? dAdAzrI : eTale bhayane laIne enI lAlaca chUTe nahIM, ne ene bhaya che ke 'A sukha mAruM jatuM raheze.' are, jatuM rahevA dene, ahIMthI. to ja peluM Avaze. ahaMkAre karIte ya kaDhAya ! praznakartA : eka rIte to A lAlaca e paNa karmano udaya ja che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, karmano udaya che. paNa A karmano udaya khoTo che ne ? praznakartA : to pachI lAlaco utpanna thavAnuM kAraNa zuM ? dAdAzrI : evA saMjogo maLI Ave tyAre lAlaco UbhI thAya. praznakartA : je vastu pratye lAlaca hoya e vastuno tiraskAra thaze tyAre lAlaca chUTI jaze ?

Page #138
226 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 225 dAdAzrI : tiraskAra ke game te, paNa te to vastuno tiraskAra thAya tyAre bIjI vastunI lAlaca Uge. ane cIjo to badhI bahu ne ! A to jema kariyANAne tyAM badhI ja jAtanI cIjo hoya ne ? evuM Amane, lAlacane tyAM badhI ja cIjo hoya, badhI ja DabIo hoya. e to sAmaTuM pheMkI de tyAre rAge paDe. nahIM to ekano tiraskAra kare to bIjuM vadhAre pese. e to ahIM satsaMgamAM beThAM beThAM koI dahADo nIkaLaze. paNa te ya ekadama to nIkaLe nahIM. e sahelI vAta nathI. lAlaca zI rIte jAya, teno rasto nathI. paNa ahaMkAra Ubho kare ne lAlacane kADhe, to lAlaca jAya. eTale lAlacane ahaMkAre karIne kADhI nAkhavAnI. e to jabarajasta ahaMkAra Ubho kare to vAMdho nathI. 'dAdA' pAse zaktio mAgIne ahaMkAra Ubho kare ane ahaMkArathI e kADhI nAkhe tyAre ! e ya ema ne ema to nIkaLe nahIM ne ! sahaja thayeluM, te nIkaLe kema karIne ? eTale ahaMkArathI kADhI nAkhe tyAre jAya. paNa pharI pAcho e ahaMkAra dhovo paDe. paNa pahelI lAlaca kADhI nAkhe, ne pachI ahaMkArane dhovAno ! eTale ahaMkAre karIne paNa kADhI nAkha. e ahaMkAra pachI ame kADhI ApIzuM. nahIM to anaMta avatArano A roga kyAre nIkaLe ? e to mArA jevAnI hAjarImAM nIkaLyuM to nIkaLyuM, nahIM to rAma tArI mAyA ! tyAre lAlaca jAya ! praznakartA : A lAlacune chUTavA mATe bIjo koI upAya to kharo ne ? dAdAzrI : e to e pote lAlaca choDe to ja jAya. badhI bAbatamAM uparathI cheda UDADI de to ja thAya. nahIM to ApaghAta svabhAva che eno ! lAlaca eTale pote potAno ApaghAta karavo te. eno koI upAya nathI lakhelo. praznakartA : e badho cheda UDADavo hoya to te kaI rIte UDe ? dAdAzrI : nahIM, e UDe ja nahIM. e to pote potAnuM badhuM baMdha karI de, lalacAvanArI cIjo badhI ja baMdha karI de, bAra mahinA sudhI aparicaya thaI jAya, to pachI bhUlI javAya, visAre paDI jAya. aparicayanI jarUra. lAlacu mANasa to rAtre be vAge ya ko'ka kaMIka dekhADe to taiyAra ! ene UMghavAnI ye paDelI nA hoya. jeTalI cIja lalacAvanArI hoya e badhI ja bAjue mUkI de, ene yAda nA kare. yAda Ave to pratikramaNa kare, to e chUTe. bAkI, zAstrakAroe eno kaMI upAya batAvyo nathI. badhAno upAya hoya, lAlacano upAya nahIM. lobhano upAya che. lobhiyA mANasane to moTI khoTa Ave ne, tyAre lobha guNa jato rahe haDahaDATa ! lAlaca khAtara to duHkha Ape ! A to Akho dahADo lAlacamAM ne lAlacamAM ja bhamyA kare. lAlacane lIdhe baLatarA thAya. te ahIM satsaMgamAM Ave eTalo vakhata zAMti rahe ane eTalA mATe to ahIMyA Ave. bAkI, Akho dahADo lAlacamAM ja bhamyA kare. enI pAse 'jJAnInI kRpA me kazuM nA kare. kRpA ye hArI jAya tyAM to. lAlacu eTale dagAkhora. AjJA ja nA pALe ne ! kRpA zI rIte Utare te ? ane duniyAmAM koIne ya sukha nA Ape, badhAMne duHkha Ape. enI lAlaca khAtara e game tene du:kha Ape. ne pelAM badhAM to eka avatAra katala thAya, paNa bIje avatAre kyAM katala thavAnAM che ? jenA bhAgyamAM hoya, te eka avatAra katala thAya. bIje avatAre kaMI ochuM katala thavAnuM che ? Avo durupayoga thato nathIne! praznakartA : enI lAlacano ene mAra paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : bahu mAra paDe. praznakartA : to e pAcho nA phare ? dAdAzrI : mAra paDe tyAre bIjI lAlaca sAMbhare ke A peluM karI AvIza hamaNe. eTale rUjhAI jAya.

Page #139
AptavANI-9 227 praznakartA : eTale rUjhAvAnI ghaNI dizA hoya enI pAse ! dAdAzrI : hA, chatAM jo kadI e zuddhAtmAmAM rahe, AjJA pALe, ne eka bAju vastuo badhI choDI de to rAge paDI jAya. paNa A to ene potAne ya khabara nA paDe ke mane lAlaca che. bhAna ja nA hoya ne, evuM. evuM bhAna hoya to to pote chUTo nA thaI jAya ? A to ame dekhADIe, tyAre ene kaMI dekhAya. e to ema ja jANe ke A huM 'samabhAve nikAla karuM chuM. lokaniMdya kAmo AcaravA ane samabhAve nikAla karavo, e benuM sAmasAmI banatuM haze ? potAnI strI sAthe vAMdho nathI. paNa lokaniMgha kAmo AcaravAM ane AjJA pALuM chuM ema mAne, Ane AjJAno durupayoga karyo kahevAya. baLyo 'lAsTa' durupayoga - so pherA durupayoga bolIe evo durupayoga karyo kahevAya. durupayoga to A sAdhAraNa mANaso ya kare che ane e lAlacu to ApaghAtI, potAno ghAta ja karI rahyo che. jo puNyazALI hoya to cetI jAya. nahIM to nA cete. cete ya zI rIte ? kAraNa ke emAM 'inTaresTa' paDato hoya ene pAcho, eTale tyAM pAcho bhamI jAya. eTale bIja gayuM nathI. bIja to hamaNe pANI paDyuM ke phUTyuM ! saMjogo bAjhayA nathI eTale. saMjoga bAjhe ke tarata phUTe. ApaNe jANIe ke ahIM purAvA kazuM rahyuM nathI, ekalI vADa ja dekhAya, gAMTho bAMTho, choDavA, kazuM che ja nahIM, paNa gAMTho hoya aMdara. te pANI paDyuM ke phUTyuM ! eTale koI abhiprAya nA apAya ke ene kazuM ochuM thayuM che. evuM thAya ja nahIM ochuM. zI rIte thAya che ? eTale badhAno cheDo Avaze, paNa lAlacuno cheDo nahIM Ave. kusaMgato pAsa ! anaMta avatArathI AnuM ja bagaDeluM che. potAnI jiMdagI ja dhULadhANI thAya ane bIjAnIye, joDevALAnIye dhULadhANI thAya. A badho tAla kusaMgothI besI gayelo. have eka phero tAla beThA pachI gAMTho jAya nahIM ne ! te AvaDI AvaDI moTI gAMTho thayelI hoya. AvaDI nAnI gAMTho hoya to jatI rahe. AvaDuM moTuM lohacuMbaka hoya to 228 AptavANI-9 e TAMkaNIne kheMce. paNa moTA lokhaMDane kheMcavA jaIe to ? lohacuMbakeya kheMcAI jAya. lohacuMbakane pakaDI rAkhIe to ApaNo hAtha hau kheMcI jAya. evuM A to badhuM kusaMganuM che. ethI zAstrakAroe kahyuM, ke jhera khAIne maravuM sAruM, paNa kusaMgano pAsa nA joIe ! enAM AvaraNa bhAre ! koI lAlaca ene nA hoya evuM nahIM. eTale evA to ahIM Ave tyArathI huM ene copaDuM ke, 'pAMsaro raheje. anaMta avatArathI mAra khAdho, paNa toya lAlaca jatI nathI. ahIM AvyA pachI tAruM ThekANuM nA paDe, to zuM kAmanuM ?" amArI 'jJAnI puruSa'nI vANI vItarAga vANI hoya, eTale vItarAgatAnA cAbakhA hoya. e vAge bahu, asara bahu kare. paNa dekhAya nahIM. paNa A mukhya guNa je lAlaca kAma karI rahyo che, e to 'jJAnI'nAM vAkyane ya khaI jAya, vATIne khaI jAya ! lAlaca !! e lAlacarUpI ahaMkAra che ne, e tUTato nathI e lokono !! "jJAna" ApIe chIe tyAre A ahaMkAra tUTato nathI, A bhAga jIvato rahe che. tethI pachI A veSa vadhe che. AjJApAlata ja aMtima upAya ! praznakartA : A "jJAna" lIdhAM pachI A lAlaca bhAga eno gayo nA hoya ? dAdAzrI : e lAlaca jIvatI rahe. praznakartA : eTale eno artha evo ke ene "jJAna' pariNAma nathI pAmyuM ? dAdAzrI : amuka bhAga pariNAma pAmyuM, paNa bIjI lAlaca jIvatI rahI.

Page #140
23) AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 229 praznakartA: to pachI A jJAna jevuM joIe evuM phaLa ApyuM nathI, tyAre ja Ama thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. lAlacu che eTale "jJAna" ja phaLa nA Ape. mULamAMthI ja, graMthi ja lAlacu ! e lAlaca 'jJAna'nI asara nA karavA de. tethI zAstrakAroe kahyuM ne, lAlacu UtaratAM UtaratAM narkagatimAM jAya. lAlacu to koI cIja bAkI nA rAkhe. praznakartA : evuM thAya ke "jJAna" lIdhA pachI, lAlacono paNa jJAtAdraSTA rahI zake ? dAdAzrI : nA. paNa tyAra ho kaMIka lAlaca Ave ne, to pAcho tyAM jAya. jyAM emano 'slIpiMga pAtha' che ke, jyAM lapasavAnI jagyA che ne, tyAM AgaLa e lokone jAgRti rahetI nathI. amuka jagyAe to bahu sarasa jAgRti rAkhe. paNa jyAM slIpiMga, enI je lapasavAnI jagyAo che ne, tyAM AgaLa jAgRti nathI rahetI. 'jJAnI' pAse phare to pharI jAya vakhate ! e to mana-vacanakAyAthI bahu majabUta thaIne, zuddha citte vAta kare ne, to kazuM thAya, to pharI jAya. nahIM to nA phare. paNa lAlaca to zuddha citta ja nA thavA de. nirNaya rahe nahIM ne ! lAlaca potAnA nirNayane toDI nAkhe. praznakartA : paNa ene koI vakhata evuM manamAM Ave ke mAre AmAMthI nIkaLavuM che ? dAdAzrI : e hoya, hoya ! paNa lAlaca evI vastu che ne, e paheluM lAlaca jAya to ja pachI nIkaLAya. praznakartA : "jJAnI puruSa'nI AjJAmAM rahe to eno aMta Avaze praznakartA : paNa dAdA, zuddhAtmA pada maLyuM che. tyAre e to joyA ja kare ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa te lapasavAnI jagyAe nA jue. bIjA badhAmAM jue ane lapasyo e to mahIM ene lAlaca che tethI ja ne ! praznakartA : te ghaDIe AjJAmAM nA rahyo to lapasavAnuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : lAlaca che eTale tyAM AgaLa AjJAmAM rahI zake ja nahIM ne ! lAlaca hoya tyAM AtmA ekAkAra thaI jAya. eTale ene to bahu puruSArtha karavAnI jarUra che. praznakartA : pharI 'jJAna'mAM bese to lAlaca nIkaLe ? dAdAzrI : nA nIkaLe. 'jJAnamAM besavAthI kaMI ochuM nIkaLe che? A to pote AjJAmAM rahevAno prayatna kare, te niraMtara AjJAmAM rahevuM ja che. evuM nakkI kare ne AjJAbhaMga thAya to pratikramaNa kare, tyAre dahADo vaLe. dAdAzrI : lAlacano aMta lAve to Ave. lAlacane ukhADaze to Avaze. eTale enA sAme prayoga kare ke AjJA pUrI pALavI che ne nA paLAI to pratikramaNa karavAM che, evuM. pachI gharavALAM badhAM mANaso joDe 'regyulara' thaI javuM joIe. 'samabhAve nikAla" AjJA pALe eTale pachI regyulara' thAya ne ? pachI 'riyala-rileTiva' jovuM joIe. paNa to ya ApaNe pUchI joIe ke AjJApUrvaka ekeya dahADo joyuM che ke ? e AjJApUrvaka joI rahyo hoya to AvuM pariNAma nA Ave ne ? joyAnuM pariNAma tarata Ave. A to badhuM buddhinuM, kazI 'helpa' nA kare. e vAto ya badhI buddhinI karavAnAM. praznakartA : eTale buddhithI ja AkhI AjJAne 'eDajasTa' kare ? dAdAzrI : hA, jJAnathI nahIM. buddhithI 'eDajasTa' kare. praznakartA : to pachI enuM pariNAma kevuM Ave ? dAdAzrI : kazuMya nahIM. buddhithI to nAza thaI jAya badhuM ! buddhi vinAzI, ane enAthI A je je thayuM e badhuM vinAzI hoya. praznakartA : nA, paNa to jJAnathI kevI rIte hoya e ? jJAnathI

Page #141
232 AptavANI-9 231 AjJA pALavI ane buddhithI AjJA pALavI emAM phera zo ? dAdAzrI : jJAnathI AjJA pALe eTale badhe pariNAma pAmeluM hoya, ane buddhithI AjJA pALe eTale pariNAma pAme nahIM kazuM. praznakartA : pariNAma pAme tyAM zuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : samabhAve nikAla thAya eTale badhe rAge paDI jAya. praznakartA : eTale pariNAma Ave bahAra ? dAdAzrI : cokkasa Ave, pAsa ja thAya. A to ApaNe joIe ne, to kazuM koI dahADo ya rAge nathI paDyuM. eka dahADo ya nahIM, eka kalAke ya nahIM ne ! praznakartA eTale A badhuM UMdhuM hatuM ke 'huM AjJA pALuM chuM, huM badhuM pAmI gayo chuM' ?! dAdAzrI : UMdhuM ja ne, tyAre bIjuM zuM ?! buddhino ja khela badho. badhAMne je kaMI kahe, badhAMnI joDe vAto kare te ya buddhinI ja vAto ! e sparze nahIM, ne sAmo zuM ke jANe ke oho, zuM thaI gayA ! eTale mAre sAmAne kahevuM paDe ke bhaI, kazuMya nathI tyAM AgaLa ! nahIMtara pariNAma to badhAM mAlama paDe, sugaMdhI AvavA mAMDe. praznakartA : eTale bahAra pariNAma nA AvatuM hoya to tyAM sudhI buddhithI ja pALI rahyo che ema gaNAya ? bIjA 'mahAtmA'one mATe pUchuM AptavANI-9 jevuM ja badhuM, emAM pheraphAra nA dekhAya. paNa khare TAIme khasI jAya ne bIjAne khare TAIme khase nahIM. praznakartA : buddhinuM jJAna eTale A jJAnane buddhithI samajelo haze ? dAdAzrI : ene buddhijJAna pragaTa thayuM hoya. kAraNa ke A lAlacanI je kharAbI rahI ne, eTale jJAna UbhuM nA thAya ne ! mahAmuzkelI bicArAMne ! ghaNoya pastAya, paNa zuM thAya ? koI miniTa sukha paDe nahIM. praznakartA : have je badhI bhUlo karI hoya, e badhI bhUlonuM pratikramaNa 'jJAnI'nI pAse karI le ane pAcho nizcaya karIne 'jJAnI'e batAvyuM e pramANe cAle to ? dAdAzrI : paNa haju bhUla dekhAtI nathI, to zI rIte pratikramaNa kare te ? e to jema jema amArA kahyA pramANe AgaLa vadhatA jaze, tema tema bhUlo dekhAtI jaze. A to haju bhUlo thaI che te ya dekhAtI nathI. eTale A AjJA pALavAnI zarUAta kare, pachI gharamAM, bIjAM badhAM AjubAju badhAMne saMbhALe, ema karatAM karatAM badhI bhUlo dekhAtI jaze. ane e bhUlo dekhAze, amuka hada sudhI Avaze, to ame ya rasto karI ApIzuM pachI AgaLa ! A to badhI zakti pAchI lAlacane maLe che, eTale emAM ne emAM zakti pesI jAya. A amArI mukelI zakti pelI lAlacamAM vaparAI jAya. e to amAre javAbadArI Ave. thoDoghaNo ukela AvyA pachI amane ema lAge, khAtarI thAya, to ame pAchaLa zakti mukIe. nahIM to e zakti pachI AmAM vaparAI jAya. to e zaktinA AdhAre pAchuM AmAM malidA maLe. eTale e to amuka hada sudhIno saMyama Ave, evuM ApaNane Ama lAge to zakti ApelI kAmanI. nahIM to A zakti ApI ApIne ja AvuM thayuM che ne ! evuM huM samajI gayo chuM. praznakartA paNa je rIte lAbha hoya, e rIte Apa kaMI kaho ne ! dAdAzrI : hA, e to e rIte kahIe. paNa A kahyuM eTaluM jo dAdAzrI : nA, bIjAne nahIM. bIjAne to kazuM aDe nahIM, bicArAne ! e to lAlacavALAne mATe, lAlacu hoya tene tyAM mULa jJAna pAmeluM nA hoya ! lAlacane ApaNuM 'jJAna' AkhuMya hAjara rahe che, paNa buddhinuM ja jJAna rahe che. eTale khare TAIme UDI jAya. buddhinuM jJAna eTale khare TAIme UbhuM nA rahe, khare TAIme e khasI jAya. Ama dekhAya 'A'nA

Page #142
AptavANI-9 233 kadI kare ne, A gharanAM badhAM mANaso joDe ema tema thoDo pheraphAra thavA mAMDyo to enI sAthe lakSmI ke pachI ene khUTaze nahIM. eTale pahelAM to bhUlanI pratIti besavI joIe. pachI ene khAtarI thAya tyAra pachI bhUla bhAMgavA mAMDe ane pachI puruSArtha mAMDavo paDe eka bAju. A bhUla evI nathI ke puruSArtha vagara cAlI jAya. jabarajasta puruSArtha mAMDavo paDe. pachI vIsa zakti utpanna thaI, eTale vIsa pAchI pharI zakti vAparI eTale cALIsanI zakti utpanna thAya, phAyado thAya. ema karatAM karatAM zakti jabarajasta vadhI jAya. praznakartA : e pote bhAvanA kare ke AjJA pALavI ja che to enuM pariNAma Ave ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : AjJA to pALavI ja joIe ne ! ane samabhAve nikAla karavo ja joIe. pachI gharavALA badhAM kahe, "nA, dAdAjI amArA taraphanI koI phariyAda nathI.' mahinAmAM pariNAma AvyA vagara rahe che ? sAcuM haMmezAM pariNAma lAve ane juThuM ya pariNAmavALuM hoya. ame to eTale kahIe ke A gharanAno pahelo nikAla lAvo, rasto lAvo. pariNAma lAve to ja ene lAbha che ne ! thoDuM pariNAma Avene, eTale dasa pariNAmI jAya tyAre vIsanI zakti utpanna thAya. pharI pAchuM vIsa pariNAmI jaze to to cALIsanI zakti vadhe. pachI potAne mAlama paDe ne, ke A zakti vadhI che mArI ?! nahIM to A to 'DIjholva thayelI zakti che. 234 AptavANI-9 vastuthI dUra rahe ? dAdAzrI : hA, ane pachI gharanA dareka mANasanI sAthe "eDajasTa' thaI zake. samabhAve nikAla karavAnI e AjJA mukhya che ne ! ane gharanAM badhAnAmAM zuddhAtmA jovA joIe ne ?! paNa A to kazuMya yAda nahIM, bhAna ja nahIM ne, e jAtanuM ! rasto A che ke 'dAdA'nI AjJAmAM rahevuM evo nizcaya karIne bIje dahADethI zarU karI de ane jeTalI AjJAmAM nA rahevAya eTalAnAM pratikramaNa karavAnAM. ane gharanAM dareka mANasane saMtoSa Apavo, samabhAve nikAla karIne. to ya e gharanAM badhAM kUdAkUda kare to ApaNe joI rahevAnuM. ApaNo pAchalo hisAba che tethI kUdAkUda kare. haju to Aje ja nakkI karyuM. eTale gharanAM badhAMne premathI jIto. e to pachI potAne ya khabara paDe ke have rAge paDavA mAMDyuM che. chatAM gharanAM mANaso abhiprAya Ape tyAre ja mAnavA jevuM. chevaTe to enAM pakSamAM ja hoya gharanAM mANaso. pachI 'vAIpha' para dhaNIpaNuM nA karavuM joIe. dhaNI che nahIM, ne dhaNIpaNuM karo cho ! nAmanA, kahevAtA dhaNI che. temAM pAchuM dhaNIpaNuM karo cho ! sAcA dhaNI hoya to vAMdho nahIM. have nathI dhaNI, tyAM AgaLa ApaNe dhaNIpaNuM karIe to UlaTI muzkelI UbhI thAya ne ?! eTale pote dhaNIpaNuM nA bajAvavuM joIe. have e baI ApaNI upara dhaNIpaNuM bajAve to ApaNe hasavuM ke "ohoho ! tame ya che te, udhAra kareluM jame karAvyuM kharuM' ema kahIe. e to sAruM ja ne, A jame karAve te ?! 'dAdA'nI niraMtara AjJAmAM rahevAya to vAMdho nathI. AjJAmAM rahevAya nahIM to pharI pratikramaNa karavuM. pUjAvAnI lAlaca ! A to kevuM ke e lAlaca kyAre UgI nIkaLe e kahevAya nahIM. pAMca-sAta jaNa ja jo maLyA hoya to bahu thaI gayuM ne ! AkhA muMbaI zaheramAM khabara ApI de ke A jJAnI AvyA che, ToLakI UbhI thaI ke badhuM taiyAra karI nAkhe. vALa nA hoya to pelA vecAtA laI AvIne karaze. A to atyAra sudhI AjJAmAM to eka miniTe ya raheto nathI. AjJAmAM raheto hoya to gharanAM mANasane duHkha thAya ? kevo samabhAve nikAla karIne badhAMno prema jItI le ! A to AjJAmAM raheto ja nathI AjJA zuM che te jANato ja nathI. khAlI buddhithI jANe ke A zabdothI jANe, paNa bhAvArtha nA jANe. nahIM to AjJAmAM rahenArane thoDo-ghaNo matabheda hoya, bAkI bhAMjagaDa nA hoya. gharanAM mANasa enAthI kaMTALe nahIM. praznakartA : eTale upAyamAM to zuddhAtmAmAM rahe, pratikramaNa kare,

Page #143
AptavANI-9 235 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : amuka mANaso evA hoya che ke yenakena prakAreya emane potAne jAhera thavuM ja hoya che, to mANasanI vacamAM. dAdAzrI : e to pAMca-dasa mANasonA guru thavAnI Teva che ene. ziSya thatAM to AvaDatuM nathI ne guru thaI besavuM che ! eTale pachI koI gharAka hAthamAM AvyuM ne, ke tyAM besI jAya. paNa te ya lAlaca mATe, badhuM bhogavavA mATe koI vastu bhogavavAnI nahIM, evuM nahIM. anaMta avatAra A ja karyuM che baLyuM. tenAM ja A lakSaNa ! A duHkha ane A aDacaNo badhI tenI ja che, A ja karyuM che !! daDukI vagADanAra pAMca-sAta-dasa jaNa joIe, ke cAlyuM pachI gADuM ! enI javAbadArI zuM Avaze enuM bhAna nathI. A avatAramAM chUTe to ya sAruM che, bahu sAruM che. paNa A vAta samaje to chUTe. nahIM to lAlaca mokSa javA de nahIM. praznakartA : paNa AvuM daMDukI vagADanArAM bhegAM karIne jJAnI thaI jAya, enI javAbadArI zuM Ave ? dAdAzrI : e to haDAhaDa agni ! narkagati ! e bhogave eTale pachI pAcho taiyAra thaIne ahIM Ave, pharI pAchuM enuM e ja ! lAlaca paDelI jAya nahIM ne ! 'jJAnI puruSa' hoya tyAre badalAI jAya kaMIka. ApaNane lAlaca nA hoya to pAchaLa phUdAM ya bhame nahIM. lAlaca hoya tyAM phUdAM bhame. lAlaca nahIM e duniyAno rAjA ! ane lAlacu to lALo pADa pADa kare, toya vaLe nahIM kazuM ya. lAlacane jIvavAnI ne majabUta thavAnI jagyA maLe, to have e jagyA ja ApIe tyAre ne ? eTale tyAM pachI pratikramaNa karavA paDe. 'pharI have nahIM javAnuM kahIe. ApaNe kahevuM ke, 'caMdubhAI, pharI AvuM javAnuM nahIM.' eka bhava, "jJAtI'tI AdhInatAmAM ! ethI ame zuM kahyuM ke A satsaMganI ekatA choDazo nahIM. nahi to juduM javA phare. paNa kazuMya nahIM AvaDe. loka dhakkA mArIne kADhI mUkaze ! AvuM nA cAle. cAlatuM haze ? banAvaTa karelo vAgha keTalo dahADA cAle ? vAghanuM cAmaDuM paherIne phare to cAle ? e mULiyuM ja Uge nahIM, eTalA mATe kahI dIdheluM, mULiyuM ja nA UgavuM joIe ApaNane. e to ApaNe A bhava AdhInatAmAM ja kADhavAno. AdhInatA choDazo nahIM. kAraNa ke jamAvaTa kare to mANaso bhegA thaI jAya. paNa emAM potAnuM ahita thAya ane pelAnuMya ahita thAya. ApaNe tyAM eka bhAI juduM kADhIne beTho hato ha3. becAra jagyAe 'dAdA'nA nAma para karI Avyo badhuM. moTI moTI sabhAo bharI Avyo ne badhuM karI Avyo. paNa meM kahyuM, 'alyA, mAra khAIza chevaTe, keTalA dahADA oDheluM cAlaze ?" pAcho, Ama pAcho ya pharI jAya. Ama ADo nA thaI jAya. paNa lAlaca pesI jAya, te 'kaMIka karI AvuM' kaheze. e pAcho jamAvI de evo hato. eka phero to hajAro mANasa bhegAM karyA hatAM. kAraNa ke moDhe jarA AkAravALo hoya, bhavyatA sArI ! paNa ene meM cetavI dIdho, saheja paNa 'dAdA'nI AdhInatA tuM choDIza to narke jaIza. tuM zabdo kaMIthI lAvavAno hato ? A zabda mArA kahevA paDaze lokone. mArA kahelA zabdo cAlaze, paNa nave navAM kahevA jaIza to narka jaIza !" eTale mAre cetavavA paDe. AvI ye lAlaca hoya 'dAdAthI svataMtra thavA ! alyA, AmAMya svataMtra thavuM che ? svataMtra to thaI gayA, kaMI potAnI chUTavAnI majabUta bhAvanA, 'sTroMga" bhAvanA hoya, paNa pelI lAlaca ne e badhuM AMtaryA kare ne ! paNa potAnA khyAlamAM rAkhe ne, ke kyAre uDADI mUkuM ? jema duzmanone khyAlamAM rAkhe ne, evuM. to Ano niveDo Avaze. nahIM to niveDo nA Ave. praznakartA : A lAlaca e bhayaMkara roga che ! dAdAzrI : e ghaNAM kALano roga che te kema karIne mAruM mAnatA thAya ! te pachI AMbe kerI hAlI ke mahIM hAlya haDahaDATa !! AMbe kerI hAlavI joIe, eTale ahIM ye aMdara kerI hAle !

Page #144
AptavANI-9 238 AptavANI-9 parataMtra cho ? kaMI mArA dabAyelA hoya to vAta judI che. pelA gurumAM dabAyelA hoIe, te tyAM vakhate svataMtra thavA pharo to vAta judI che. ahIM kaMI dabAyelA nahIM, kazuM nahIM, ane huM to kahuM chuM ke, huM to badhAno ziSya chuM." pachI bhAMjagaDa zene mATe ? paNa Teva paDelI anAdinI, svataMtramAM majA Ave, 'InTaresTa' Ave. mela pULo inTaresTane ! mahIM paDI rahe ne AmAM, A satsaMgamAM ne satsaMgamAM !! praznakartA : paNa dAdA, svataMtratA karatAM 'huM kaMIka jANuM chuM evuM dekhADavAnI icchA hoya. dAdAzrI : e ja bhAMjagaDa che ne ! 'huM jANuM chuM' e to badhuM, jANato kazuMya nA hoya. have eka bhava AdhInatAthI kADhavo. praznakartA : AdhInatAthI to sAruM ne, kaMI upAdhi to nahIM. dAdAzrI : hA, upAdhi nahIM. badhA AdhInatAthI ja kADhe. paNa ko'kanuM mahIM mULiyuM vAMkuM hoya te veSa bhajavIne Ubho rahe pAcho, judI daMDukI vagADe ! AdhItatA paNa upara tahIM mane keTalAka loko ema kahe che ke, 'tame thoDIghaNI cAvIo judI tamArI pAse rAkhI mUkatA nathI ?" meM kahyuM. zenAM hAru huM cAvIo rAkhI mUkuM ? mAre guru tarIke rahevuM hoya ane ropha bajAvavo hoya evo, to cAvIo rahevA dauM. paNa mAre rophe ya nathI bajAvavo ane guru tarIke rahevuM ya nathI. amAre to tuM ja guru have. guru tarIke rahevuM hoya ne, te potAnuM pUrepUruM jJAna Ape nahIM. kAraNa ke ziSyane thoDuM thoDuM Apato jAya eTale ziSya jato nA rahe, ane enuM gADuM cAlyA kare. ane ahIM to badhAMne chUTa che. ahIM to mArI pAse rahe che ne, emane kahI dauM ke tamAre jyAre bhAgI javuM hoya tyAre bhAgI jajo. huM nA nahIM kahuM. tame mane muzkelImAM mukazo to ya huM tamane nA nahIM kahuM. tamAre jyAre bhAgI javuM hoya tyAre bhAgI jajo. zuM vAMdho pachI ? ane huM kyAM Amane mAthe vIMDhALuM ? evuM to A guruo kare ke jemane bIjI lAlaco hoya. jene kaMI lAlaca nathI ene khudAye pUche nahIM. kAraNa ke khudA pUche ke "tuma kahAM gaye the ?" to e khudA phasAya ! kone pUchayuM sAheba, tame A ?! bhUla karI A !! jene koIpaNa prakAranI lAlaca nathI emane pUchavAno adhikAra nathI. khudAne paNa pUchavAno adhikAra nathI. lAlaca choDo. lAlacamAM badhuMya AvI jAya. hetu, pUrNakAmato ghaTe tame joyelI lAlaca ? praznakartA : are, ApaNe ja lAlacu hatA ne ! dAdAzrI : ema ?! zI bAbatamAM ? praznakartA : are, game te bAbatamAM, satsaMganI bAbatamAM lAlacu ja hatA ne ! dAdAzrI : A mArI joDe lAlacu e lAlacu kahevAtA nathI. bIjI badhI bAbatomAM lAlacu kahevAya. A lAlaca nA kahevAya. mArI joDe to A svArtheya nA kahevAya. mArI joDe tame je svArtha rAkho, enuM nAma ja paramArtha ! praznakartA : huM ahIM Avyo ane kheMcAIne Avyo chuM. paNa jJAna meLavavAnI lAlacathI ja Avyo chuM ne ! dAdAzrI : e lAlaca sArAmAM sArI ! e uttamamAM uttama lAlaca !! A lAlaca to nA rAkhene, tene ame kahIe ke, 'jarA kacAza che tamArAmAM, pAkA nathI.' lAlaca to AnI rAkhavA jevI che. bAkI, saMsAramAM koI cIjanI lAlaca rAkhavA jevI che nahIM. lAlaca to AnI rAkhavA jevI che. tame rAkhI e uttama kAma karyuM. praznakartA : paNa A jJAnanI lAlaca kahevAya ?

Page #145
239 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : lAlaca to zuM hetu mATe che, e jovAya che. kAraNa ke lAlaca to bahu sarasa kAma kare che, jo hetu sAro hoya to. praznakartA : A zubha hetunI lAlaca che, ema gaNAya ne ? dAdAzrI : zubha hetu nahIM, A pUrNakAmanI lAlaca ! zubha hetu to, hamaNe dAna zIkhyA ke phalANuM zIkhyA emAM zubha hetu che ja. pachI pAcho azubha hetu Avaze. paNa jyAM zuddha hetu che ke jyAM pUrNakAma thavAnuM che, pachI koI kAma bAkI nA rahe evuM pUrNakAmasvarUpa hoya, e zuddha hetu che ! 240 AptavANI-9 Ave che. tuM navA be zabda bola. zabdo navA hovA joIe ke 'DIjhAInavALA hovA joIe ke 'prekTikala' hovA joIe, evuM hovuM joIe. to kaMI mANasamAM pheraphAra thAya. nahIM to e to Age se calI AI, ene zuM karavAnuM ? e 'sImIlI' to huM vAMcata to mane ya jaData ! tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ne, ke zAstramAM nathI, sAMbhaLyAmAM nathI, chatAM anubhavamAM Ave evI jenI vANI che to e "jJAnI" kahevAya ! nahIM to pachI ene 'jJAnI" kahevAya ja nahIM ne !! zAstramAM nathI, sAMbhaLavAmAM nathI... praznakartA H have jJAnI vagara AvA phoDa koNa pADI zake ? bAkI, jagatamAMthI chUTavuM hoya te keTaluM badhuM jokhamI che ! dAdAzrI : AvuM bhAna ja nA hoya ne ! kharekhara to, huM baMdhAyelo chuM ke nahIM evuM jANe to ya bahu sAruM. paNa baMdhAyelo che eTale e jANe ke "A badhAya loka kare che ne !' eTale ene bahAnuM jaDyuM. alyA, badhA kUvAmAM paDyA hoya to tAre hau kUvAmAM paDavuM ?! paNa lAlaca chUTI ke enI suMgadhI Ave ! praznakartA : adhyAtmamAM lAlacu zabda koI divasa sAMbhaLyo nathI. dAdAzrI : koI chUTuM pADe ja nahIM ne ! koNa chUTuM pADe ? A to ApaNe vigatavAra samajAvIe. e to zAstro je vAMcelA hoya, te cAra prakAra bole ke krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha ! tyAre koI kaheze, "e to sAheba, zAstramAM che. kaMI navuM batAvo ne !' eTale e Age se calI AI. te zAstra jyAre thayuM haze ne, tyArathI temAM lakhyuM che 'baLelI doraDImAM sApanI bhrAMti thaI, evI rIte A jagata bhrAMtivALuM dekhAya che !" te haju ye e zabda pheraphAra karanAro koI nIkaLyo nahIM. e ne e ja zabdathI cAle che gADuM ! "sImIlI' ja A. bIjI 'sImIlI' AvaDe nahIM. mahA mahA moTA manuSyoe paNa AnI A ja 'sImIlI' ApI. ane bIjI. chIpamAM che te cAMdInI bhrAMti thaI. tyAre A be zabdo to pahelethI cAlyA

Page #146
[5] mAta : garva : gAravatA mAta, mamatA vagaranuM eTale 'jJAnI puruSa'ne to badhuM ja pUchAya ! ane A "akrama vijJAna' evuM che ke ahIM hareka vastu pUchAya. pistALIsa AgamanI hareka vastu pUchAya ane vedAMtanI ye badhI vAta pUchAya. A to kudaratI rIte banyuM che ! ne moTAmAM moTuM Azcarya, agiyAramuM Azcarya gaNAya che. ahIM kalAkamAM tamAruM badhuM ja kAma thaI jAya che. praznakartA : pUrva janmanAM ApanA ATalA badhAM sArAM karmo hatAM, to ya Apane ATalI badhI pAchalI uMmaramAM kema jJAna thayuM ? pahelAM kema nA thayuM ? dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, amAruM mohanIya karma pUruM thAya tyAre jJAnAvaraNa tUTe. jJAnanuM AvaraNa kyAre tUTe ? mohanIya karma pUruM thAya tyAre. amane zeno moha hato ? amane koI prakArano moha nahoto. paisAno ke viSayano koI moha nahoto. eka mAnano ja moha ! praznakartA : hA. e samajAvo ne ! 1958mAM Apane jJAnano AvirbhAva thayo, e pahelAM ApanI AMtarika paristhiti vize jarA vigatavAra samajAvo ne ! 242 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : hA, jJAnano AvirbhAva thatAM pahelAM krodha-mAna-mAyAlobha, rAga-dveSa emAM vizeSa karIne mAnanuM ja jora hatuM, sAmrAjya ja mAnanuM hatuM ane enA AdhAre bIjA jIvI rahyA hatA. mAnanuM ja jora ! pAchuM abhimAnanuM jora nahIM. abhimAna to, pAchuM mamatA hoya tyAre abhimAna thAya. A to mamatA vagaranuM mAna ! praznakartA : mamatA vagaranuM mAna kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : huM ja, huM ja kaMIka chuM, huM ja kaMIka chuM e. praznakartA : e to mamatA kahevAya. dAdAzrI : nA. mamatA to bIjI vastu che. "A mAruM che', enuM nAma abhimAna. 'A mAruM che, A kevuM che, A mAruM che' e abhimAna kahevAya ane mAna eTale 'huM'nuM ja che te bahuvacana, e mAna kahevAya. mAna to hoya. mAna hoya, teno vAMdho nathI. abhimAna che te mamatA dekhADe. mamatA hoya to ja abhimAna hoya. te mamatAnuM mULathI lakSaNa amArAmAM ochuM, bilakuleya ochuM ! A mAnanuM ja hatuM ke huM kaMIka chuM, badhAM loko karatAM vadhAremAM vadhAre 'huM kaMIka chuM" e badhuM khoTuM. kazuMya nA maLe. kaMI bhalIvAra ja nahIM. mAnI beThelA eTaluM ja. huM 'jJAna' pahelAMnA jIvananI vAta karuM chuM, ke bIjA krodha-mAnamAyA-lobha, badhAM AnA, mAnanA 'aMDarahenDa' thaIne pharyA karatAM hatAM. ne mamatAno guNa pahelethI nahIM. matamAM mAteluM mAta ! eTale manamAM ema ja jANe ke huM ja chuM, A duniyAmAM koI che ja nahIM. jo, potAnI jAtane zuM mAnI beThelA ! milakatamAM kazuM nahIM. dasa vIghA jamIna ane eka ghara, e sivAya bIjuM kazuM nahIM. ane carotarano rAjA hoya evuM manamAM ropha rahe. kAraNa ke AjubAjunA cha gAmavALA lokoe amane cagAvelA. paiThaNiyA vara, mAgo eTalI paiThaNa Ape tyAre A vara tyAM paiNavA jAya. enI A magajamAM tumAkhIo bharAI gayelI. ane kaMI pUrvabhavanuM lAvelo, tethI A khumArIo badhI hatI.

Page #147
AptavANI-9 temAMya mArA moTAbhAI jabarajasta khumArIvALA hatA. mArA moTAbhAIne huM mAnI kaheto hato, tyAre e mane mAnI kahetA hatA. to ya eka dahADo mane zuM kahe che ? 'tArA jevo mAnI meM joyo nathI.' meM kahyuM, 'zemAM mAruM mAna juo cho ?" tyAre kahe, 'dareka bAbatamAM tAruM mAna hoya che.' 243 ane te pachI meM tapAsa karI, to badhI bAbatamAM mAna nIkaLyuM mAruM ane te ja kaiDatuM hatuM. ane mAnane mATe zuM karyuM ? je koI hoya, te kahe ke 'aMbAlAlabhAI, aMbAlAlabhAI !' have 'aMbAlAla' to koI kahe ja nahIM ne ! cha akSarathI bole. ane pachI Teva paDI gaI, 'hebicyueTeDa' thaI gayA temAM. have mAna bahu bhAre eTale mAnanuM rakSaNa kare ne ! te pachI 'aMbAlAlabhAI'nA cha akSara nA bolAya ane ko'ka utAvaLamAM 'aMbAlAla' bolI UThe, e kaMI guno che eno ? cha akSara sAmaTA ekadama utAvaLamAM to zI rIte bolAya te ? praznakartA : paNa tame evI AzA rAkho ne ? dAdAzrI : are, huM pachI tola karuM ke "A mane 'aMbAlAla' kahyuM pAchuM ? zuM samaje che ? zuM 'aMbAlAlabhAI' nA bolAya enAthI ?"' gAmamAM dasa-bAra vIghAM hoya ne bIjo kazo ropha nahIM to ya manamAM zuM mAnI beThA ? ame cha gAmanA amIna, vAMkaDAvALA ! ahIM tamAre tyAM desAI vAMkaDAvALA hoya che ne ? te e ya DeMsIvALA hoya. have sAmAe 'aMbAlAlabhAI' nA kahyuM hoya to mane AkhI rAta UMgha nA Ave, akaLAmaNa thAya. le !! emAM zuM maLI javAnuM ?! AmAM moDhuM kaMI mIThuM thaI javAnuM ?! kevo svArtha mANasane hoya che ! e svArtha, te emAM kazoya svAda nA hoya. chatAMya mAnI beThelo che, te ya lokasaMjJAthI. lokoe emAM moTA banAvyA ne lokoe moTA mAnyA ya kharA ! are, A lokonAM mAnelAnuM zuM karavAnuM te ?! A gAyo-bheMso ApaNA sAmuM badhAM joI rahe, badhI gAyo ApaNA sAmuM joI rahe, ane pachI kAna halAvatI hoya to ApaNe ema samajI javAnuM ke ApaNane mAna Ape che A ?! evuM che A to badhuM. ApaNA 244 AptavANI-9 manamAM mAnIe ke A loko badhAM mAnathI joI rahyAM che, manamAM mAnIe ! e to sahu sahunAM duHkhamAM che bicArAM, sahusahunI ciMtAmAM che. e tamArAM sAruM kaMI paDI rahyAM che ? navarAM che ? sahu sahunI ciMtAmAM pharyA kare che ! e badhuM ya mAta mATe ja ! meM lokone kaheluM, 'tamAruM kAma karAvI jajo mArI pAse, je kaMI hoya te. salAha saMpa, bIjuM kaMI hoya ! mArI pAse paisA hoya to ya ApIzuM, paNa tamAruM kAma karIzuM. tamAre mAruM kAma karavuM nahIM.' kAraNa ke mAruM kAma tamane karavAnuM nA kahuM ne, eTale tamane mArA taraphano bhaya nA rahe. rAte koIka dahADo sinemAmAM gayA hoya ne tyAMthI tamAre tyAM AvyA. tame kaho, 'A koI dahADo Ave nahIM, ne Ama AvyA. mATe kaMI joItuM haze !' te A UlaTuM tame 'satI' upara draSTi bagADo cho. ApaNe joItuM nathI ane e draSTi bagADe, phaphaDe mahIM ke 'kaMI mAgaze, mAgaze.' tyAre meM badhAne kahI dIdhuM ke A hAtha dharavA mATe nathI. mATe tamAre je jarUra hoya, te mane kahejo.' eTale badhAM nirbhaya banI gayelAM. roja caccAra gADIo ghara AgaLa paDI rahe. mAmAnI poLamAM paMdara rUpiyAnuM bhADuM, saMskArI poLa. AjathI pistALIsa varSa para kyAM baMgalAmAM loko rahetA hatA ?! mAmAnI poLa bahu uttama gaNAtI hatI. te dahADe ame tyAM mAmAnI poLamAM rahetA hatA ane paMdara rUpiyAnuM bhADuM. te dahADe loko sAta rUpiyAnA bhADAmAM paDI rahe, ame paMdara rUpiyAmAM, Ama moTA kaMTrAkTara kahevAya. have tyAM mAmAnI poLamAM pelA baMgalAmAM rahevAvALA Ave moTaro laIne. kAraNa ke upAdhimAM sapaDAyelA hoya, te ahIMyA Ave. te UMdhuM-chatuM karIne AvyA hoya ne, to ya emane 'pAchale bAraNe' rahIne kADhI meluM. 'pAchaluM bAraNuM' dekhADuM ke ahIM rahIne nIkaLI jAva. have guno eNe karyo ane 'pAchale bAraNe' choDAvI ApuM huM. eTale guno mArA mAthe lIdho. zenA sAru ? peluM mAna khAvA sAru ! 'pAchale bAraNe' kADhI melavuM e guno nathI ? Ama akkalathI dekhADyuM hatuM pAchuM, te pelA bacI jAya. eTale pelA amane mAnathI rAkhe, paNa guno amane coMTe. pachI samajAyuM ke bebhAnapaNAmAM A badhA gunA thAya, mAna khAvA mATe. pachI mAna pakaDAyuM. jo ciMtA thAya mAnanI !

Page #148
AptavANI-9 245 praznakartA : Ape mAna pakaDayuM, pachI mAnane kaI rIte mAryuM ? dAdAzrI : mAna mare nahIM. mAnane A Ama upazama karyuM. bAkI, mAna mare nahIM. kAraNa ke mAranAro pote, kone mAre ? pote potAne mATe kevI rIte ? tamane samajaNa paDI ne ? eTale upazama karyuM ne jema tema dahADA kADhelA. krodhathI bhayaMkara uttApatA ! mAre nAnapaNamAMthI lobha nahoto. paNa mAna bahu bhAre hatuM, eTale krodhe ya bhAre ! praznakartA : mAnamAM jarAka paNa magajamArI thaI eTale tame kopAyamAna thaI jAva, ema ne ? dAdAzrI : mAnamAM eka vALa jeTaluM UbhuM thAya ne, to bhayaMkara uttApanA thAya ane sAmA ya dhrujI jAya bicAro ! evo krodha, te sAmAne bALI mUke evo krodha nIkaLe. evo jabarajasta krodha hato. kAraNa ke bIjo lobha nahIM ne ! ghaNA pherA to mArA krodhathI, e je ajJAnatAmAM mAro krodha hato e jo kharekharo ukaLyo hoya to sAmo mANasa tyAM ne tyAM ja marI jAya. eka zIkha to marI javAno hato, te mAre jovA javuM paDyuM hatuM ne mAthe hAtha pheravyo tyAre rAge paDyuM. eTale ame A sthitimAM hatA. ghera kaMI lAMbA rUpiyA hatA nahIM. khAlI uparano DoLa, dekhAva ! emAM A upAdhi, ciMtA pAra vagaranI ! gamato ahaMkAra duHkhadAyI banyo ! tyAre AjubAjuvALA loka zuM kahe ? bahu sukhI mANasa ! kaMTrAkTano dhaMdho, paisA Ave-jAya. loko para prema, lokoe paNa premadraSTi kabUla karI ke bhagavAna jevA mANasa, bahu sukhI mANasa ! loka kahe ke sukhI mANasa, ne huM ciMtA pAra vagaranI karato hato. ne pachI eka dahADo ciMtA maTatI nahotI, UMgha ja nahotI AvatI. pachI beTho ane ciMtAnuM paDIkuM vALyuM. Ama vALyuM, tema vALyuM ne upara vidhi karI. maMtrothI vidhi karI ane pachI be ozIkA vacce mUkIne sUI gayo, te UMgha kharekharI 246 AptavANI-9 AvI gaI. ane pachI savAramAM paDIkAne vizvAmitrImAM padharAvI Avyo, pachI ciMtA ochI thaI gaI. paNa jyAre "jJAna" thayuM tyAre badhuM AkhuM jagata joyuM-jANyuM. praznakartA : paNa "jJAna" pahelAM enI ye jAgRti to hatI ne, ke A ahaMkAra che ema ? dAdAzrI : hA, e jAgRti to hatI. ahaMkAra che te ya khabara paDatI hatI, paNa e gamato hato. pachI bahu kaiDyo tyAre khabara paDI ke A to ApaNo mitra hoya, A to ApaNo duzmana che, majA nathI e kazAmAM. praznakartA : e ahaMkAra duzmana kyArathI lAgavA mAMDyo ? dAdAzrI : rAte UMgha nA AvavA de ne, eTale samajI gayo ke A to kaI jAtano ahaMkAra ! eTale to eka rAte Ama paDIkuM vALIne savAre vizvAmitrI jaIne padharAvI Avyo. zuM thAya paNa ? praznakartA : eTale paDIkAmAM zuM mUkyuM? dAdAzrI : A badho ahaMkAra ! mela paLo ahIMthI A zenA sAru te ? vagara kAmanAM, nahIM levA, nahIM devA ! loka kahe 'pAra vagaranA sukhiyA che ane mAre to ahIM sukhano chAMTo nA dekhAto hoya, mahIM ahaMkAranI ciMtA-upAdhio thayA kare ne ! saheja ahaMkAra ghavAyo ke AvI banyuM, AkhI rAta UMgha nA Ave. are, pahelAM to lagnamAM javuM ne, te tyAM koIe Ama je' je karyuM hoya paNa nA dekhAyuM hoya to veSa thaI paDe. potAnI jAtane zuM ya mAnI beThelo. kazuM nahotuM temAM, paNa manamAM mAnI beThelo ! eka sTeTa hoya to jANe ThIka che ke baroDA sTeTa hatuM. A to kazuMya nahotuM ne ! vagara sTeTe DoLa. DoLI loka kahevAya. ane kapaDAM paheravAnAM, jANe bahu ye moTo gAyakavADa sarakArano pitarAI hoya ne, evuM ! have AmAM zuM kADhavAnuM ?! paNa pachI kharuM rAge paDI gayuM. praznakartA : e ahaMkArathI judA rahIne vartatA hatA? evuM kazuM?

Page #149
AptavANI-9 247 dAdAzrI : nA. judA nahotA rahyA tyAre to A dazA thaI hatI ne ! tyAre ja UMgha nA Ave ne !! judA rahyA hota to besADI nA daIe ene ?! paNa ahaMkAra ekalo ja poSAyA kare. kapaTa nahIM, mamatA to bilakuleya nahIM. mamatA kharI, paNa bahu jUja. ahaMkAranI ja mamatA, paisAnI mamatA nahIM. eTale kazuM AvaDatuM nahotuM ne ahaMkAra pAra vagarano hato. eka ATaluM AvaDe, koIne 'helpa' karavAnuM ! khAtadAtIto ahaMkAra ! eTale A mAna mane bahu. jANe zuM ye huM moTo ! kAraNa ke kSatriya kuLamAM janmelA. paTela eTale kSatriya. eTale pelI paiThaNa (daheja) badhA Ape ne ! te janmatAM ja moTI vAto kare ke A ATalo ceka AvavAno ne ATalA AvavAnAM. moTA cekavALo vara Avyo ! ane tevA guNo ya kharA pAchAM. e paiThaNa ema ne ema ApatAM nathI. evA guNo hoya, kuLanA guNa hoya ene lIdhe Ape ane ekaluM kuLeya nA cAle. jAti ane kuLa bane joIe, tyAre paisA Ape. nahIM to Ape ke ?! ekalo kuLavALo kevo hoya ? "nobala' hoya. 'nobala' hoya eTale kuLavAnanA amuka sArA guNo hoya. tyAre e koIne chetarato na hoya ne koI luccAI na karato hoya. e kuLavAna ane jAtavAna be hoya to e paiThaNa ApavA lAyaka gaNAya. jAtavAna eTale zuM ? "nobala' paNa hoya ane Ama koIne chetarato nA hoya. chetaravAnA koI guNa enAmAM hoya nahIM. have 'nobala' kone kahevo ? je jatAM ya ve'rAya ne AvatAM ya karavatI verAya. eTale letI vakhate pote ve'rAya, sAmo ene chetare. ane detI vakhate pote chetarAya, ema karIne ke bicArAne duHkha thaze, mATe ApavAnuM che, tenA karatAM thoDuM vadhAre Apo. eTale beu bAju ve'rAya. enuM nAma khAnadAna kahevAya, e 'nobala' kahevAya. ane A khAnadAnIno ahaMkAra haze, teno vAMdho nathI. e ahaMkAra khAnadAnI sAcave che. hA, nahIM to ahaMkAra nA hoya to khAnadAnI UDI jAya, nAdArI kADhe. 248 AptavANI-9 amArA moTAbhAI ahIM AgaLa vaDodare rahe. te huM vaDodare AvuM tyAre AjubAjuvALA koI kaheze, 'amAruM gaMjI paheraNa lAvajo, amAruM A lAvajo, amArI be caDIo letA Avajo.' mitro badhA kahe ne ?! ane mAro svabhAva kevo ? jenI lArI AgaLa Ubho rahyo ane pUchayuM eTale ene tyAMthI ja levAnuM. pachI vadhatuM-ochuM hoya to ya nabhAvI levAnuM. kAraNa ke ene duHkha nA thAya eTalA mATe ene tyAMthI ja levAnuM. eTale huM mAro svabhAva samajuM. ane je lokoe vastuo maMgAvelI, te loko sAta jagyAe pUchI pUchIne, badhAMne apamAna karI karIne paNa laI Ave. eTale huM jANuM ke A loko mArA karatAM be Ane phera lAve evA che. ane mArI pAse maMgAvyuM to mArA be AnA vadhAre javAnA che. eTale huM be AnA e ane eka Ano vadhArAno, ema karIne traNa AnA bAda karIne huM pelAne rakama kahuM. bAra AnA ApyA hoya to 'nava AnA meM ApyA che" evuM ene kahuM. eTale e ema nA kahe ke "mArAmAMthI kamizana kADhI gayA. huM to daza Ane lAvato hato ne mAre tamane bAra AnA ApavA paDyA. mATe tame be AnA kADhI lIdhA.' evuM loka mArI upara 'kamizana'no Aropa na kare eTalA mATe A traNa AnA ochA lauM, traNa AnA kADhI nAkhuM. hA, nahIM to kaheze, 'be AnA kamizana kADhI lIdhuM " le ! alyA, nathI kAryo 'kamizana'. 'kamizana' kADhavAnuM huM zIkhyo nathI mArI jAte. ame nathI lIdhuM 'kamizana', AkhI jindagImAM nathI karyuM. sAmA mANase kahyuM hoya ke, 'tyAMthI mane jarA ATaluM kAma karI Apo ne !" eTale zuM ke paccIsa hajArano mAla hoya, te apAvI devAno hoya. temAM ApaNe traNaso-cAraso 'kamizana' khAI jaIe to ? sAmo mANasa evuM jANato hato ke A "kamizana' khAze ? ne eTalA mATe eNe tamane ApyuM che ? nahIM. eTale eNe ApaNane soMpyuM ane emAM A vizvAsaghAta ?! AvuM zobhe nahIM ApaNane ! praznakartA: paNa A badhuM to 'necarala' che ne ? dAdAzrI : zuM necarala ?! paisA khavAtA haze ? paisA khavAya nahIM. e to khAnadAnI che. have ajJAnadazAmAM ya jo khAnadAnIno ahaMkAra nahIM

Page #150
AptavANI-9 hoya to khAnadAnInI nAdArI nIkaLaze. ApaNe to khAnadAna ! khAnadAna mANasathI khoTuM kazuM thAya ja nahIM. kazuM khoTuM nA karavuM, enuM nAma khAnadAna. kaMIpaNa lokaniMdya kArya nahIM karavuM, enuM nAma khAnadAna. khAnadAna hoya, enAthI koI lokaniMdya kArya thatuM nathI. loka niMdA kare evuM kArya khAnadAnamAM nA hoya ane loka niMdA kare toya e kahe ke 'ame khAnadAna', to e jUThuM khAnadAna kahevAya. koI 'eksepTa' kare ja nahIM ne ! loka niMdA kare ane khAnadAna kahevAya, e be guNAkAra maLe ja nahIM ne ! 249 have je kAma karIe ane kahI daIe ke 'meM karyuM', to khAnadAnI jatI rahe. khAnadAna to beu bAju ghasAya, AvatAM ya ghasAya ane jatAM ya ghasAya. ne karavatI jevo mANasa to beu bAju ve're, ApatAM ya ve're ne letAM ya vere ! mAtatI bhUkha ! have nAnapaNamAM hareka bAbatamAM jene mAna maLeluM hoya, tene mAnanI bhUkha moTI uMmaramAM hoya nahIM. nAnapaNamAM mAnanI bhUkha maTelI hoya to mAnanI paDelI nA hoya. apamAnanI tarachoDa vAge to mANasa khalAsa thaI jAya. nAnapaNamAM be-pAMca-dasa vakhata apamAna jo thaI jAya ne mAna maLatuM nA hoya ne mAnano tarachoDAyelo hoya, tyAre mAnanuM ja eNe niyANuM karyuM hoya. te moTI uMmaramAM bahu mAnI thAya, sakhata mAnI thAya. nAnapaNamAM ja eNe nakkI karyuM hoya ke mAre have A badhAnI 'AgaLa' javuM che. eTale pachI e henDala mArIne 'A badhAthI AgaLa AvuM tyAre ja kharo', kaheze ne e AgaLa Ave paNa kharo ! hA, tana toDIne mahenata badhuM ja kare, paNa AgaLa jAya. ane nAnapaNamAM mAna maLyuM hoya, te vadhAre AgaLa jAya nahIM. have mAna bahu maLe to mAnanI bhUkha maTI jAya. 'AuTa oNpha pramANa' mAna maLyA ja kare, to pachI mAnanI bhUkha maTI jAya. pachI ene mAna nA game. amane ochuM mAna ApatA haze loka ? evuM mAna tamane maLe to bhUkha maTI jAya pachI. 250 mAtatA 'svAda'mAM lobha chUTe ! AptavANI-9 tamane mAna game che ? praznakartA : dAdA, A je atyAra sudhI apamAnanA bhayane lIdhe je saMkucitatA hatI agara to mAnanI hAni thaze, ethI peluM 'DIprezana' rahe, ane koI prakriyAmAM pote bhAga paNa nA le, AghA khasI jAya. te A mAna maLe eTale muktatA AvatI gaI. dAdAzrI : nahIM, A lobhagraMthi che. tethI ene mAna maLe ne je svAda Avyo eTale pelI graMthi tUTavA mAMDI. lobhagraMthi tUTe. mAnano svAda cAkhavAno maLyo ethI lobhanI graMthi tUTe, haDahaDATa ! have mAnanI gAMTha hoya ne, te mAna ene pherava pherava kare. jyAM mAna maLatuM hoya, tyAM ene kahe ke "tamArA nAmanI eka taktI mUkAvI daIzuM.' to kaheze, 'pacAsa hajAra lakhajo.' mAna maLe tyAre lobha choDI de. jyAre lobhiyo lAkha mAna maLe to ye lobha choDe nahIM. evA lobhiyA to A kALamAM zodhavAya muzkela che. A kALamAM evA lobhiyA che ja nahIM. lobhiyA to trIjA ne cothA ArAmAM hatA. bahu jabarajasta lobhiyA. A kALamAM to nathI mAnanuM ThekANuM ne nathI lobhanuM ThekANuM. mAta, mAtatI bhIkha 'kaMI ja joItuM nathI', enuM badhuM kAma thAya che. vastu sAme AvI paDe to ya nathI joItI. tamAre to joIe che ne ? zuM zuM joIe che ? praznakartA : Ama khabara paDe ke haju mAna joIe. dAdAzrI : mAna joIe teno vAMdho nahIM. paNa mAnanA sAru upayoga rahyA kare ? ke mAna kema karIne maLe, evuM ? praznakartA : nA, evo upayoga nA rahe. dAdAzrI : pachI mAna nA maLe to ? praznakartA : to kaMI vAMdho nahIM.

Page #151
251 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : teno kazo vAMdho nahIM. bAkI, mAnanI kAmanA hoya e ja bhIkha kahevAya che. koI paNa vastunI kAmanA e bhIkha kahevAya che. kAmanA, bhIkha e nikAlI bAbata nA gaNAya. kAmanA, bhIkha najIka najIkanA zabdo che. bAkI, upayoga nA jAya to kazuM aDe ja nahIM. eTale AmAM mArga rUMdhAto nathI. paNa bhIkhavALo to bIjA mArge caDhayo ema kahevAya. 252 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : e mAna nIce pADI na de ? dAdAzrI : e to abhimAna nIce laI jAya. eTale loka mAna Ape to cAkhavAmAM vAMdho nathI. paNa joDe joDe ema rahevuM joIe ke A na hovuM ghaTe, ane mAna Ape te levAnI ApaNe chUTa ApI che, paNa mAna ApanAra para rAga nA thavo joIe. mAna vastunI chUTa che, paNa mAna ApanAra para rAga nA thavo joIe. praznakartA : koI mAna Ape ne game, e mAnanI bhIkha kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. game, e to svAbhAvika rIte game ja. tamane khAMDavALI cA game ke khAMDa vagaranI ? e to khAMDavALI cA svAbhAvika game ja, paNa koIka kaheze ke, 'bhaI, mane to khAMDa vagaranI ja cA game che, bolo !' tyAre huM kahuM ke e ahaMkAra che. enAM karatAM khAMDavALI cA pIne, chAnomAno. svAdiSTa to rahe. kharuM ke khoTuM ? praznakartA : have mAna game to kevuM kahevAya ? mAtamAM kapaTa : mAtanI vikRti ! praznakartA : A mAna cAkhe, e pachI jAgRtine 'DAuna' nA kare, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti ochI thAya ja ne ! have mAnamAM kapaTa hoya tyAM jAgRti utpanna nA thAya. mAnamAM kapaTa hoya tyAM mAna dekhAya ja nahIM. sic dAdAzrI : e game, to eno vAMdho nathI, game to kharuM ne ! paNa chone, mAna game. kazo vAMdho nahIM. koI kaheze ke, "e mAnano mArAthI nikAla thato nathI." to huM kahuM ke, 'have A bhavamAM nikAla nahIM thAya, to Avate bhava nikAla karIzuM.' paNa mAna khA nirAMte ! mAta cAkho, paNa... eTale mAnanI icchA nA hovI joIe. mAna ApeluM hoya ne tamArI thALImAM Ave to khAva nirAMte. ane dhIme rahIne, Ate rahIne khAva, rophathI khAva. paNa enI icchA nA hovI joIe. praznakartA : paNa e mAna vaTAve, emAM ene kaMI vAMdho nA Ave? dAdAzrI : mAna vaTAve emAM zuM vAMdho ? mAne to vaTAya, te to kharcAI gayuM. pharI have UbhuM nathI thatuM ne ? mAna to cAkho. huM kahuM chuM ne, cAkho. pachI kaMI tyAM AgaLa cAkhavAnuM che ? tyAM siddhagatimAM kaMI mAna maLavAnuM che ? ahIM maLe eTaluM cAkho nirAMte. paNa Teva nA pADI dezo, "hebiTyueTeDa" nA thazo. praznakartA : mAna che te sahaja maLe to cAkhavAno vAMdho nathI. paNa e pachI vikata thavA mAMDe ne enI icchA thAya evuM bane ne, pachI ? dAdAzrI : evuM tevuM thAya, paNa te icchA to hovI ja nA joIe. ane icchA thAya te nukasAnakAraka che. praznakartA to e mAnanI vikRti pachI kaI kaI ane keTale sudhInI hoI zake ? dAdAzrI : bahu jAta jAtanI vikRtio hoya. mAnanI vikRtio to bahu ja hoya. ane te mAnanI vikRti ja mANasane pAcho pADe che. eTale mAna cAkhavAne mATe vAMdho nathI. koI tamane kahe 'Avo, padhAro sAheba, Ama che, tema che.' e mAna tame badhuM nirAMte cAkho-karo. paNa teno tamane kepha nA caDhI javo joIe. hA, cAkho nirAMte, ane aMdara saMtoSa thaze. paNa jo kepha caDhyo to, e thaI gayuM kadarUpuM ! bAkI, mAna hoya tyAM sudhI mANasa kadarUpo dekhAya ane kadarUpo thAya eTale koIne AkarSaNa nA thAya. kadarUpo dekhAya ke nA dekhAya ? moDhA upara rUpa hoya,

Page #152
AptavANI-9 253 to ye paNa kadarUpo dekhAya. mAna zAthI UbhuM rahyuM che ? sAmAne pote halako mAne che mATe mAna UbhuM rahyuM che. mATe ene halako nahIM mAnavo ane e to mAro uparI che evuM kahevuM. to mAna UDI jAya. apamAna karatAse, upakArI ! praznakartA : have to A mAna-apamAna bahu kheMce che, emAMthI mukta thavuM kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : apamAna kheMce che ke mAna kheMce che ? praznakartA : Ama to apamAna. dAdAzrI : are, baLyuM mAna paNa bahu kheMce. jo mAna paNa vadhAre paDatuM Ape ne, to mANasa Ubho thaI jAya. mAna bahu Ape ne, to tyAMthI kaMTALIne nAsI Ave mANasa. roja Akho dahADo mAna Apa Apa kare ne, to tyAMthI mANasa kaMTALIne nAsI jAya. ane apamAna to ghaDIvAre ya game nahIM. mAna to thoDIka vAra game ya kharuM. chatAMya mANasa apamAna sahana karI zake, mAna sahana nahIM karI zake, hA, mAna sahana karavuM e to bahu sIsuM pIdhA jevuM che. chokaro paiNavAno thAya ne, te bApane nIco namIne page lAge tyAre bApa Ubho thaI jAya, UMco thaI jAya. 'alyA, tuM kema hAle che ?" tyAre e kahe, 'sahana thatuM nathI.' praznakartA : ane chatAM apamAna nA game, te kevuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : apamAna nA game, e to bahu ja khoTuM kahevAya. apamAna to nA game ane e to ApaNA badhA lokone apamAna nathI gamatuM. e gamADavAnI zakti lokone utpanna thaI nathI. emaNe to apamAna karanAro bhADe rAkhavo joIe. paNa koI bhADe rAkhatuM ja nathI ne ! paNa bhADAvALo apamAna sAcuM kare nahIM ne ! ane loka to, jyAre sAcuM apamAna kare che tyAre e besI jAya che. sAcuM apamAna kare ene upakArI gaNavAno. paNa tyAre mANasa besI jAya che. sAcuM apamAna kare tyAre besI javAya nahIM. 254 AptavANI-9 eTale sAmo koIka apamAna karanAra maLI Ave ne, to bahu upakArI mAnIne 'e joDe ne joDe rahe to bahu sAruM" evuM nakkI karajo. apamAnato premI ! koI mANasa kaMIka apamAna kare te vakhate e apamAna karanAro mANasa, tamArA karmanAM udaya thAya tyAre e nimitta bheguM thAya. tamAro karmano udaya tamAre bhogavavAno che, emAM eno zo doSa bicArAno ? eTale karI jojo akhataro A rIte. apamAna kare, vakhate gALa bhAMDe toya paNa ApaNAM karmano udaya che eTaluM mAnajo. agara to ApaNe rastAmAM jatAM hoIe ane DuMgara uparathI gabaDato gabaDato AvaDo patharo paDyo, to ApaNe zuM karIe te ghaDIe ? praznakartA : bhAgyamAM hoya to vAge ja. dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. DuMgara uparathI patharo gabaDato gabaDato ApaNA mAthA para paDyo eTale e vAgyo, eTale ApaNe joI laIe ke koI che nahIM. mATe emAM koInI para kaSAya karatAM nathI. ane ko'ka mANase AvaDo kAMkaro mAryo hoya to kaSAya karIe chIe. enuM zuM kAraNa ? ApaNane samajaNa phera che. e kAMkaro mAranAroya DuMgara che ane pelo DuMgara che. AmAM zuddha cetana nathI, e mizra cetana che. e ya paththara ja che, DuMgara ja che bicAro. eTale ATaluM jo karazo to bahu thaI gayuM. evuM che, apamAna karI nAkhe tyAre apamAnano premI nA thaI zake ne ? jeTalo mAnano prema hoya, te eTalo apamAnano premI nA thaI zake, nahIM ? jeTalo naphAno premI che eTalo khoTano premI nA thaI zake, nahIM ? gaNataratI helpa ? tamAruM apamAna kare to zuM karo tame ? mAruM kahevAnuM ke jyAM sattA nA hoya, tyAM 'game che" kahI devAnuM. sattA nA hoya tyAre zuM karavAnuM ? nahIM to 'game nahIM' kahIe, eTale e keDyA kare nahIM. AkhI rAta keDyA kare, huM ke ! tamane koI divasa keDeluM ?!

Page #153
AptavANI-9 255 praznakartA : rAtonI rAta kaiDyA kare, jhATakA vAge. dAdAzrI : mANasa zI rIte dahADA kADhe che, te ja juo ne ! bhaNelAM mANasa upAdhine ochI karI nAkhe, bane tyAM sudhI upAdhino bhAgAkAra karI nAkhe ne ene cheda UDADI de. paNa potAnuM nA cAle tyAre pachI gUMcAya. bhaNelAmAM gaNatarI nathI hotI eTale gUMcAya che. bhaNatara hoya che, paNa gaNatara nahIM ne ! gaNatara e judI vastu che. mane bhaNatara nathI AvaDyuM, paNa gaNatara bahu sAruM AvaDe che. meTrIka 'pheIla' thayo, paNa gaNatara bahu sAruM AvaDe. pratikAra, tyAM pratikramaNa ! praznakartA : apamAna thAya e nA game, to tyAM zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : eno vAMdho nahIM. paNa apamAna thAya tyAre humalo nA karo ne ? praznakartA : vANI evI nIkaLe, vANIthI 'eTeka' thAya. dAdAzrI : paNa evo tamAro bhAva nathI ne ? praznakartA : bilakula nahIM. evI vANI nIkaLyA pachI potAne bilakula game nahIM. paNa AvI vANI nIkaLI e asaMyama to thaI gayo ne ? e lAbha maLe nahIM ne, koI ? dAdAzrI : paNa 'pharsTa' saMyama eTale aMdara evuM thavuM joIe ke 'nA, AvuM nA hovuM joIe. A kema thAya che ?' e pahelo saMyama. paNa A saMyama zarU thavo joIe. sAco saMyama ja e kahevAya. pachI 'lAsTa' saMyama dhIme dhIme Ave. praznakartA : ko'ka vakhata AvuM apamAna karI nAkhe to tyAM manano pratikAra cAlu rahe, vANIno pratikAra kadAca nA thAya. dAdAzrI : ApaNe to e vakhate zuM banyuM, eno vAMdho nahIM. are, dehano ye pratikAra thaI gayo, to ye e jeTalI jeTalI zakti hoya, e pramANe vyavahAra hoya che. jenI saMpUrNa zakti utpanna thayelI hoya, tene 256 AptavANI-9 manano pratikAre ya baMdha thaI jAya, chatAM ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ? manathI pratikAra cAlu rahe, vANIthI pratikAra thaI jAya, are dehano ye pratikAra thaI jAya, to traNeya prakAranI nirbaLatA UbhI thaI to tyAM traNeya prakAranuM pratikramaNa karavuM paDe. praznakartA : dAkhalA tarIke koI apamAna kare, to ene mahIMthI eTaluM badhuM mAna jabarajasta UbhuM thAya, potAnI sAme trAguM UbhuM thAya, to e ene kyAM sudhI pADe ? dAdAzrI : paDI ja gayelA che ne ! trAguM UbhuM thayuM e ja paDI gayelA ne ! trAguM UbhuM thAya e moTAmAM moTuM ahitakArI kahevAya. trAguM UbhuM thavuM e moTAmAM moTo bhaya ja che. e saMpUrNa paDI ja gayelo che, emAM pachI AgaLa paDavAnuM rahyuM ja nathI. apamAtanI nirbaLatA ! ame to zuM kahyuM che ? apamAna nA game teno vAMdho nathI. paNa mAnanI bhIkha nathI rAkhavAnI. praznakartA : paNa apamAnano bho, e nabaLAI to kADhavAnI ja che ne ? dAdAzrI : e to jema jema apamAna khAtA jaIe tema tema apamAnanI nabaLAI ochI thatI jaze. jeTalI dhIrelI, te pAchI AvI jAya. mAnanI bhIkhano vAMdho che. praznakartA : ApaNuM apamAna nA thAya e lakSamAM rahe, e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : apamAna nA thavA mATe ja tyAM AgaLa upayoga rahyA kare, sAcava sAcava kare, e bhIkha kahevAya. ne nahIM to cAritra mohanIya, e to nikAlI moha che. AvyuM ne gayuM, kazuM levA nahIM ne devA nahIM. AtmAte, mAta - apamAta ? eTale A badhI pudgalanI bhIkha che. mAna ne apamAna e badhI

Page #154
AptavANI-9 257 pudgalanI bhIkho che. amane to dhola mAre to ya vAMdho nahIM. praznakartA : A mAna-apamAnanI je vAta thaI, e mAnaapamAnano khyAla kone Ave che ? e kaMI dehane nathI Avato. e to AtmAne ja Ave che ne ? dAdAzrI : AtmAne mAna-apamAna hoya nahIM. e bhikhAro nathI ke ene mAna-apamAna hoya. e to AkhA brahmAMDano rAjA kahevAya, brahmAMDano bhagavAna kahevAya. praznakartA paNa aMdara je pahoMce che, e to AtmAne coMTa lAge che ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. AtmAne nathI lAgatuM. AtmAne aDe nahIM. praznakartA : deha to anAtmA che. dehane zuM asara thAya mAnaapamAnanI ? dAdAzrI : A baraphane dhakhadhakhato agni aDADIe to zuM thAya ? agni aDADIe to barapha dAjhe ke nahIM ? praznakartA : dAjhe nahIM, paNa barapha ogaLI jAya. dAdAzrI : e to potAno ThaMDo svabhAva, te UlaTo pelAne TADho kare che. evI rIte AtmAne du:kha aDe nahIM. A dehaneya lAgatuM nathI ane AtmAne ya lAgatuM nathI. praznakartA : to kone lAge che ? dAdAzrI : A bhogave che koNa ? ahaMkAra. ahaMkAra bhogave che ne ahaMkArane lAge che. e ahaMkAra A bhogave che ne, tene lAge che. AtmAne kazuM aDe nahIM. AtmA to enI potAnI cIja sivAya svIkAra ja nathI karato koI cIjano. bIjI cIjano svIkAra ja nathI karato. jenuM apamAta, te "pote' hoya ! A 'caMdubhAI'nuM koIka apamAna kare to zuM thAya ? rAte UMgha nA 258 AptavANI-9 Ave ne ? jhATakA vAge ! Ama kSatriya prajAne, te jhATakA vAge. pelo apamAna karanAro UMghI gayo hoya, paNa A jhATakAvALo nA UMdhe ! koI apamAna kare ne ApaNane UMgha nA Ave evuM zA kAmanuM te ? evI nirbaLatA zuM kAmanI te ? koIka apamAna kare ne ApaNe zuM kAma nA UMdhIe ? ane ko'kanuM apamAna thAya che, tamAruM thatuM ja nathI. 'tamAruM apamAna kare to sahana nA ja karavuM joIe. paNa e 'tamAruM apamAna nathI karato. to zuM karavA Ama hAya hAya karo cho ? A to koIkanuM apamAna thAya che ne 'tame mAthe laI lo cho. "mane kahyuM" evuM to nA hovuM joIe ne ?! hA, 'tamAruM' apamAna nA karavuM joIe koIe. paNa 'tamAruM' apamAna koI kare ya nahIM. tamane oLakhe ja zI rIte ? 'tamane to koI oLakhatuM ja nathI ne ! oLakhe to 'caMdubhAIne oLakhe. e 'ApaNane' to oLakhato ja nathI ne ! have e apamAna karanAro upakArI jyAre gaNAze tyAre tamAruM mAna chedAI jaze. konuM apamAna karavAnuM ? 'aMbAlAla mULajIbhAInuM'. tAre jeTaluM apamAna karavuM hoya eTaluM kara ne ! mAre kyAM emanI joDe sATuM-sahiyAruM che ?! e mArI joDenA pADozI che. te jo raDaze to huM pAcho chAno rAkhIza. paNa 'mAruM apamAna thayuM mAne che eTale bicArAne UMgha nA Ave. nahIM to keTalI gajabanI zakti eka eka 'InDiyana'mAM che. phakta ene kholanAra nathI. to ya atyAre juone, A dIna thaI gayA che loko ! juo to kharAM, jyAM ne tyAM 'dhU'mAM UbhA rahe che bicArAM, eTalAM badhAM dIna thaI gayAM che. nahIM to A prajA to kevI hatI ? saheja vAtamAM, bolavAmAM ke "InvITezana' ApavAmAM jarA apamAna jevuM lAgyuM hoya to jamavA nA jAya evI A prajA ! paNa atyAre juone DhasaraDA mAre che, 'dhU'mAM UbhA rahIne ! ApaNe kahIe, 'kema sAheba, 'kyUmAM UbhA rahyA cho ?" tyAre kaheze, "basamAM javAnuM che." "are, roja roja zAnAM hAru basamAM javAnuM ? svataMtra rasto kADhatAM nathI AvaDatuM tane ?" tyAre kahe, "zuM rasto kADhe ? nokarI karuM chuM ne !" eTale A to jIvana badhuM 'phrekacara thaI gayuM che. nahIM to saheja apamAna jevuM lAge ne, to jamavA nahotA jatA. A loko

Page #155
AptavANI-9 259 apamAnane bahu moTI kiMmatI gaNanArA hatA. eTale A lokone ame kevuM jJAna ApavA mAgIe chIe ke AkhA 'varlDa'nA badhA dezomAM phare, paNa "DIpresa' koIthI thaI nA zake. DIpresa' nA thAya evuM joIe. ane je koIne "DIprezana' Ape che e pote "DIpresa' thayA vagara raheto nathI. game te moTo mANasa hoya, AkhuM 'varlDa' hoya, paNa ApaNane DagAvI kema zake ? have apamAnano bho jato rahe to vyavahAranA mANaso naphaphaTa thaI jAya, eTale apamAnano bho che tethI A pheTamAM rahyA che. nahIM to pheTamAM rahe ke A loko ? ane nizcayamAM apamAnano bho jato rahe to mANasa svataMtra thaI jAya. ApaNe tyAM apamAnano bho jato rahe, to svataMtra thaI jAya. vaLagelI vaMzAvaLI kaSAyatI ? mAna ne apamAnanI ja paDelI che ne, badheya ? praznakartA : paNa dAdA, pahelethI A cAlyuM AvatuM haze ? dAdAzrI : anAdikALathI badho Ano A ja mAla. manuSyamAM Avyo tyArathI mAna ne apamAna. nahIM to bIjI vaMzAvaLImAM kazuMya nahIM. bIjI yonimAM nahIM, ahIM AgaLa bahu ane devalokomAM bahu. praznakartA : bIjI yonimAM jAya pachI A mAna-apamAna bhUlI jatAM haze ? dAdAzrI : bhUlI jAya. A ahIMthI gayo tyAMthI ja bhUlI jAya badhuM yAda nA rahe. ApaNe cothe dahADe zuM khAdhuM hatuM, te tamane yAda che ? praznakartA : nA. paNa vera-jhera, mAna-apamAna, e badhuM jIvane yAda rahe ane A badhuM kema bhUlI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : nA, eya yAda nathI rahetuM. A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha ekaluM ja yAda rahe che. A cAra saMjJAo kAyama rahe che. bAkI, vera-jhera to pachI thAya che. e yAda AvatuM nathI. apamAna thAya ke bUmAbUma kare. 260 AptavANI-9 pelI goLIone zuM kahe che ? A chokarA khAya che te ? praznakartA : pIparamenTa. dAdAzrI : have pIparamenTa ahIM AgaLa hoya to bebIne ne A bAbAne, ene levAnI hoya, to temAM je lobhiyo hoya te vadhAre laI le. ApaNane khabara paDe ke A lobhiyo che ! lobhiyo oLakhAya. lobhiyo jemAM ne temAM AgaLa hoya. praznakartA : mANase A badhI musIbatono zAMtithI sAmano karavo joIe te thato nathI, tenuM zuM kare ? dAdAzrI : kema karIne kare ? A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhanI nabaLAIo che, to musIbatono sAmano zI rIte thAya ? krodha amatho besI nA rahe. e to mAna nAmano zatru peThelo hoya tyAre ja e besI rahe. krodha to mAnanuM rakSaNa karavA mATe hoya. eTale jyAM sudhI mAna che tyAM sudhI gurakho rahevAno ja. praznakartA : eTale apamAna sahana karatA zIkhI javuM joIe, ema ? dAdAzrI : apamAna sahana karavAnI zakti Avaze, e mAna jaze tyAre. e gurakho che. "mAne' gurakho rAkhelo che ke jo apamAna karavA Ave to tene kahe, "tela kADhI nAkhaje." ane pelo eka lobha che, teNe ya eka gurakho rAkhyo che. te kapaTa rAkhyo che. ene ja mAyA kahI. ane lobha jato rahe to e mAyA jatI rahe. krodha che e mAnano gurakho. mUrakha cho, akkala vagaranA cho' evuM koIke kahyuM hoya tyAre ApaNe kahevuM, 'bhaI, huM Ajano nathI, pahelethI ja evo chuM." ema kahevuM. - loko krodha mAre che ne ? koI che te lobhane mArI mArIne ocho kare. tyAre pelI mAyA zuM kahe che ? mAyA kahe che ke, "mArA cha putro che, krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha, rAga ne dveSa. e mArAM cha chokarAM ane huM sAtamI, amane koI niveza karI zakyA nathI. hA, eka phakta 'jJAnI puruSa' ekalAM ja amane nirvaza karI zake. bAkI, koI amane

Page #156
AptavANI-9 ra61 nirvaza karI zake nahIM. tuM game eTalA mArA krodhane mArIza, tuM lobhane mArIza, paNa jyAM sudhI mAro mAna nAmano chokaro jIvato che tyAM sudhI badhAM jIvaMta thaI jaze." 'jJAnI puruSa' mAna nAmanA chokarAne mAre, teya mAre nahIM, gAdIethI uThADeya nahIM. jagyA "cenja' karI Ape. mAre, to to hiMsA karI kahevAya. 'mAra' zabda Avyo to hiMsA karI kahevAya. hiMsA hoya nahIM. ahaMkArane e mAre nahIM. 'karatArA'nI jagyA "cenja' ! praznakartA : A kAma-krodha-moha-lobha ne mada, emAM kharAba cIja kaI ? dAdAzrI : mada. praznakartA : mada sauthI vadhAre kema ? lobha kharAba nahIM ? dAdAzrI : zenA AdhAre UbhuM rahyuM che, te jovuM joIe ne ? madanA AdhAre ja UbhuM rahyuM che. mada ! e AdhAra nA hoya to koI UbhuM rahe evuM nathI. praznakartA H to mada eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : hAthInA baccAne zuM kahe che ? praznakartA : madaniyuM. dAdAzrI : to e ja. praznakartA : paNa A badhI cIjo, te 'kaMTrolamAM AvI zake. paNa lobha 'kaMTrolamAM nA AvI zake ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa lobhano karanAro 'kaMTrolamAM Ave eTale badhuM kaMTrolamAM AvI gayuM ne ! meM kaMI koIne lobhane kADhavAnuM kahyuM hatuM ? meM kaMI lobhane kADhavAnuM kahyuM che ? lobhanA karanArAne pakaDyo, ne haDahaDATa 262 AptavANI-9 gAdIethI uThAvI dIdho, ke badhuM UDI gayuM haDahaDATa ! rAjA maryo eTale lazkara badhuM bhAgamabhAgA ! lazkaramAM vAta cAle ne, ke rAjA marAyA. pachI koI UbhuM nA rahe. eTale rAjA pakaDAvo joIe, basa ! eTale mada hoya to lobha kare ne ! nahIM to lobha kare nahIM ne ! mada jo jAya to kazuMya lobha rahe nahIM. A garIbone bicArAne kazo lobha ja nahIM ne ! kAraNa ke mada nahIM eTale zAno lobha ?! mAta, e hiMsakabhAva ja ! evuM che, krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha badhuM hiMsakabhAva ja che. A krodhamAna-mAyA-lobha e badhI hiMsA ja gaNAya che. kapaTa e bahu moTI hiMsA gaNAya che. mAyA eTale kapaTa, krodha to UghADI hiMsA, opana hiMsA. praznakartA : Ape kahyuM ne, kaSAyamAM hiMsakabhAva hoya to mAnamAM hiMsakabhAva kevo hoya ? e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : mAna pote ja hiMsakabhAva che. mAnI mANasa bIjAnI hiMsA kare che. e to sAmo kaMIka kAmanI jarUriyAtavALo hoya, koI svArthI hoya, matalabI hoya, e to nabhAvI le. paNa bIjAne to mAnI mANasa kevo lAge ? have mAnanI aMdara krodha bharAyelo ja che, tiraskAra hoya ja. mAna eTale tiraskAra ! huM kaMIka chuM, ke tiraskAre lokone. mAna eTale ja tiraskAra. ane abhimAnI to bahu tiraskAra kare. mAnI judo, abhimAnI judo. ahaMkArI judo, tuMDamijAjI judo, ghemarAjI judo ! mAtanA paryAyo ateka ! A mAnanA zabdo to badhA bahu paryAyomAM che, eTalA badhA paryAyo che. praznakartA : tuMDamijAjI, ghamaMDa, e badhA kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e to badhA jAtajAtanA zabdo evA che. loka to

Page #157
264 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 263 garva ane gAravatA, e badhuM potAnI bhASAthI samaje ne ? abhimAnane garva kahe evAM loka che ApaNAM. ahaMkAra kone kahevo, abhimAna kone kahevuM, mAna kone kahevuM, garva kone kahevo, tumAkhIvALo kone kahevo ? praznakartA : khumArIvALo kone kahevo ? dAdAzrI : khumArIvALo, e badhAM jAtajAtanAM abhimAna che ne ! pachI kayo zabda ? ghamaMDI ! ghamaMDa to kazoya mAla nA hoya ne kaheze, "are, vakIlanA bApane harAvI pADuM." eTale ApaNe samajIe ke ghamaMDI che e. jAtajAtanAM loka badhAM, mAla badho jAtajAtano ! pachI maccharAyelo kahe, vaLI AnAmAM ghemarAjI bahu che, emeya kahe. te A badhAmAM 'Dipharansa" che, tene laIne nAma juduM juduM pADeluM. maccharALo to thoDoka macchara jevo ja hoya. caTako mAre e, to lhAya baLe. praznakartA : paNa A badhAM abhimAna, ghamaMDa, e mANasanI amuka uMmara pachI Ave ne ? bALakamAM evuM kaMI bahuM hotuM nathI. dAdAzrI : bALakamAM bilakuleya nA hoya. jema buddhi vadhe, tema A badhuM tophAna vadhatuM jAya. eTale A badhA zabdonA paryAya bahu moTA che. paryAya samajavo bahu muzkela vastu che. e to "jJAnI puruSa' pAse jANavA maLe. praznakartA : e badhAMnA judA judA phoDa pADo ne ! dAdAzrI : A pelo majUra jato hoya, eTale ApaNe kahIe, 'alyA, zuM tAruM nAma ?" tyAre e kahe, 'lalavo.' have e potAne lallubhAI nathI kaheto, eTale ApaNe jANIe ke e ahaMkArI ekalo ja che. ane ApaNe koIkane pUchIe ke, "zuM nAma ?" tyAre e kahe ke, 'lallubhAI.' eTale ApaNe jANIe ke A mAnI hau che joDe. ane bIjo koIka jato hoya eTale ApaNe kahIe, "koNa cho tame ?" tyAre e kahe, 'huM lallubhAI vakIla. nA oLakhyo mane ?" eTale abhimAnI hau kahevAya. eTale A badhAM enAM lakSaNa ! ahaMkAra, pachI e mamatA svarUpanI sAthe thayo eTale abhimAna UbhuM thayuM. kaMI paNa mamatA, game te jAtanI ! eTale koI paNa prakAranI mamatA sahita che e abhimAna thayuM. jayAre ahaMkAra ekalo hoya, mamatA vagara hoya, to e ahaMkAra kahevAya. praznakartA : pachI tuMDamijAjI rahyuM ne ? enI Dephinezana' zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : tuMDamijAja ! nahIM samajaNano AMkaDo, nahIM lakSmIno AMkaDo, to ya mijAja pAra vagarano. paiNavAnuM nA maLatuM hoya to ya pAcho mijAja ! alyA, paNavAnuM nathI maLatuM to ya zAno mijAja karyA kare che te ? e tuMDamijAja kahevAya ne, pachI. pachI tumAkhIvALo. te AjathI poNo so varSa upara kalekaTaro, polIso, DI.esa.pI.o., e badhAnI tumAkhI hatI, jANe bhagavAna hoya eTalI tumAkhI rAkhatA hatA. ane moTA moTA zeThiyAone mAre-jhuDe. moTA moTA zeThiyAone haMTarathI phaTakAre. jo tumAkhI, tumAkhI !! hamaNAM thoDAka ja vakhata para meM joyelI badhI. amAro dhaMdho kaMTAkTano ne, eTale badhA ophisaro pAse javAnuM, te tumAkhIvALA joyelA tyAM. A TrenamAM kalekTaranA sAme pharsTakalAsamAM besAya nahIM. Ama cokhkhA hatA. zistanI bahAra nA cAle. paNa tyAre tumAkhI pAra vagaranI hatI. kevI tumAkhI ! lokone haDadhUta, haDadhUta karI mUke. amArA kAma para ekjhikyuTIva enjiniyara Ave ne, te dhamadhamATa karAvI de ane dhAre ema karI nAkhe. kAraNa ke pAvara che ne, enI pAse. ame joyelI A tumAkhI badhI. te mane atyAre hasavuM Ave che, A moTA moTA kalekTarone joIne. pahelAM zuM tumAkhI rAkhatA hatA, jANe bhagavAna AvyA hoya evuM. ane atyAre to kalekTara cappala paherIne nIkaLyo hoya ne enA paga upara ApaNo bUTa paDe to 'plIjha, plIjha kare. pahelAM to AvuM banyuM hoya ne, to haMTarathI phaTakAre. teya sTezana upara ne sTezana upara ja phaTakAre. jyAre have to 'plIjha, plIjha' kare. A mAra

Page #158
AptavANI-9 265 khAI khAIne jo pAMsarA thayA che ! tumAkhI badhuM UtarI gayuM ne ! gADImAM moTo kalekTara hoya to ya kazuM bolAya nahIM ne ! ane garvanara hoya to ya nA bolAya. paNa jo mAra khAI khAIne pAMsarA thaI gayA ! ane have to kaheze, 'hA, cAlaze.' laIneya zuM kaheze ? 'hA, hA, cAlaze, cAlaze.' pahelAM to nahotA bolatA "cAlaze' ne have ? A to badhuM ja TADhuM Tapa thaI gayuM ! ane atyAre to loka moTA mANasonIye TIkA kare to ya kazuM nahIM. jo TADhA Tapa thaI gayA ne ! pAMsarA thaI gayA ke nathI thaI gayA ?! pAMsarA thayA che ne pAchA bIjA mAra khAI khAIne haju pAMsarA thaze. praznakartA : pachI AgaLa, ghemarAjI kevo hoya ? dAdAzrI : e ghemarAjI zabdano zo artha thAya ? praznakartA ghemarAjI eTale ghamaMDa ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. e ghamaMDeya judo che, ghemarAjIye judo che. A loko to bahu pAkAM loka che. ATale sudhI ghamaMDa ane AthI vadhAre kare to ghemarAjI. pramANamAM pheraphAra thayo hoya to tarata juduM pADI nAkhe. A to bahu pAkAM loka che. ghemarAjI eTale ahIMthI cheTe traNa mAIla javAya evuM nA hoya zarIra, ane pAcho kaheze 'AkhI duniyA pharI AvuM.' loko ghemarAjI rAkhIne pharyA kare amathuM. "magajamAM ghemarAjI rAkhIne pharyA kare eTaluM ja che.' kahe che ne ? te e ghemarAjI rAkhe. pachI ApaNAM lokeya kahI Ape, AbarU kADhI nAkhe ke 'vagara kAmano ghemarAjI rAkhe che, juo to kharA !" loka to kaMI choDe ke ?! ghamaMDa rAkhe to choDe nahIM, ghemarAjI rAkhe to choDe nahIM. badhuM je je kaMI rAkhe tene choDe nahIM, kahI Ape. kaheze, "ghamaMDa rAkhe che A.' 'abhimAna kare che, mAnI che.' badhuM kahI Ape loka to. ghemarAjI eTale zuM? 'chITa, chIMTa, chITa. tuM jA ghera, bITa, chITa." badhAne "chITa chITa' karyA kare. are, pAMsaro rahe ne ! mane besavA to de. paNa tyAre kahe, "chIMTa choTa.' eTale ene bIjA loko hisAbamAM ja nA 266 AptavANI-9 Ave. ene badhA A jAnavara jevA lAge. mANaso ya jAnavara jevA lAge. bolo have, e ghemarAjI ! e kaI bhASAno zabda lAge che tamane ? parzayana bhASAno zabda che ? praznakartA: A taLapadI, carotariyA bhASAno che. dAdAzrI : hA, carotarI bhASA ! kaheze, ghemarAjI bahu che. o pAse che nahIM kazuM ya ne ghemarAjI bahu che. ane ghemarAjI zabdaya ApaNA gujarAtImAM che ne ! have A zabda kyAMthI utpanna thayo, enuM 'rUTa kaoNjha', huM khoLuM paNa te jaDatuM ja nathI kazuM ! abhimAnanuM e badhAnuM 'rUTa kaoNjha' jaDe che. praznakartA: eTale zabdo jeTalA dekhAya che eTalA sAdA nathI hotA, aMdara bahu rahasya hoya che. dAdAzrI : hA, naryA arthanA ja bharelA che A zabdo badhA. e uparano artha karavAno nahIM. eno paramArtha mahIM rahyo che aMdara. paNa te keTalAya paDa jAya tyAre paramArtha prApta thAya. praznakartA: Ape kahyuM, "ahaMkAra bahu ja hato.' to enAthI A ahaMkAranAM badhAM 'phejhijha' anubhavamAM AvI gayAM ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, badhI bAjuno anubhava ! enAM 'paraspekTiva nyU hala joyelA. "paraspekTiva" ahaMkAra kevo dekhAya, te Ama khabara paDe. praznakartA: e kevo dekhAya ? dAdAzrI : are, oLakhuMne, paNa ! 'phranTa elIvezana,' 'beka elIvezana' 'paraspekTiva yU', badhI rIte oLakhuM. 'dAdA' 'beka elIvezanamAM kevA dekhAya, te khabara paDe mane. 'phranTa elIvezana'nI khabara paDe, 'paraspekaTIva'nI khabara paDe. nAkane badhuM kevuM dekhAya, te badhI khabara paDe. praznakartA : nAka to dehanuM thayuM. paNa ahaMkAranAM 'phejhijha' kevA dekhAya ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAranuM ya pachI dekhAya ne ! A dehanuM paheluM dekhAya,

Page #159
AptavANI-9 267 to pelo ahaMkAra dekhAya pachI. ahaMkAra to ogaLe. paNa A deha pramANe sAnurUpa hoya, e juduM nathI hotuM. praznakartA : sAnurUpa eTale ? dAdAzrI : nAka TUMkuM to ahaMkAra TUMko. nAka lAMbu to ahaMkAra lAMbo. eTale A zarIranuM hoya ne, e ahaMkAranuM paNa evuM ja hoya. 'hama' taDe mokSe jatAM ! praznakartA : A 'igo' ane 'ahaMkAra' vacce zuM bheda ? dAdAzrI : e eka ja vastu che. praznakartA : A, 'hama' kahe che, te paNa ahaMkAra ja kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : "hama' juduM che ne ahaMkAra vastu judI che. evuM che ne, lokoe to mukhya gaNyuM ke mokSe jatAM bairI-chokarAM ja naDe che. alyA, A ekaluM ja kaMI naDe che ? bIjI badhI keTalIya cIjo naDe che. A bairI-chokarAM bicArAM zuM naDatA haze ? emanI pathArImAM e sUI jAya, emAM ApaNane zuM naDyuM ? ApaNA peTamAM pesIne koI suI jAya che ? ApaNA peTamAM pesIne sUI jatuM hoya, to navuM kahevAya. sahu sahunI pathArImAM sUI jAya, emAM ApaNuM zuM gayuM ?! tyAM peluM to ApaNA peTamAM pesIne naDe che, ke 'hama, hama, hamaku kaisA ?!" A 'hama" nA jAya, jyAM jazo tyAM 'hama" joDe hoya ja. joyelo tame 'hama" ? paNa e dekhAya nahIM. chatAM lakSaNa uparathI mAlama paDe ke A 'hama" AvyuM, AMkhamAM dekhAya. A bIju badhuM ya chUTayuM ne 'hama' rahyuM, te 'hama' to bahu khoTuM. enAM karatAM be bairIne paiNIne pharato hota to sAro, te 'hama' jatuM raheta. gALo khAya eTale 'hama' jatuM ja rahe ne ! ane A ekalo sAMDha jevo, ene koNa gALo de ?! bairI nahIM, kazAka koInA lAgamAM Ave nahIM, pachI "hama vadhI jAya. ane aTakaNa to pAra vagaranI hoya badhI. 268 AptavANI-9 manuSyone bahu aTakaNa hoya. ane ahaMkAra to UbhI karelI cIja nathI. e to grahAI gayelo che. pote ja pakaDAI gayo che, saMjogonA AdhAre ! te e ahaMkAra to chUTI jAya. ahaMkAra to 'roMga bilIpha' ja che khAlI, bIjuM kazuM nathI. jyAre 'hama' to, e vAta ja judI. e 'hama" meM joyelA badhA. 'hama, hama' gA gA karyA kare, huM samajI gayo ke tamAruM zuM thaze te ? 'rIjharvezana kyAM maLaze, e ame tarata jANI ja jaIe ne ! e 'hama'nuM gADImAM kyAM "rIjharvezana' maLaze, e nA samajIe ame ? praznakartA : to A 'hama' che, ene gADha ahaMkAra kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, 'hama' e ahaMkArane aDe nahIM. ne ahaMkAra jato rahe, paNa 'hama" nA jAya. 'hama' to dhAre e kare. A polisavALAne bicArAne evo 'hama' nA hoya. have ahaMkAra to, ene samajAvIe-paTAvIe, to nIkaLI jAya. paNa 'hama' to bahu judI vastu che. A saMsArIomAM je 'hama' thayelo ne, e to mAra khAIne pachI nIkaLI jAya. praznakartA: e 'hama je che, te adhyAsane maLatuM kharuM ? dAdAzrI : adhyAsa ? nahIM, adhyAsa to, A badho adhyAsa ja kahevAya che ane 'hama' to vaLI adhyAsane ya caDhI bese evuM. dehano adhyAsa e judI vastu che. paNa 'hama'nA adhyAsane to pahoMcI nA vaLAya. deha to bicAro bhoLo che. A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhe ya bhoLA che. paNa A 'hama' jevI to duniyAmAM koI cIja nathI. kAraNa ke kazuM ja nA hoya tyAre eno janma thAya, svayaM jAta ! hama ! 'hama'vALAnI khabara paDI jAya amane ! eno avAja khakhaDATavALo hoya. khakhaDATa, kaladAra rUpiyo khakhaDe ne, evo khakhaDe ! tame joyelA ke ! praznakartA : ApaNI AjubAjuthI koI ThekANe e 'hamavALAnI

Page #160
AptavANI-9 khabara paDe ke 'hama, huM kaMIka chuM.' dAdAzrI : nA, e 'huM kaMIka chuM' e juduM che. evuM che ne, A badhAM 'huM kaMIka chuM'vALA je che, e saMsArI tamane jovA maLe. saMsArI che, enuM to jyAre tyAre 'hama' UtarI jAya. Amane to mAra khAya ne, to 'hama' UtarI jAya. jyAre pelA lokone to 'hama' utAranAra koNa ? te 'hama'ne pachI sohamAM laI jAya. 269 praznakartA : 'hama' UbhuM thavA mATe enI pAse kaMIka hoya ? kaMI sAmAna hoya kazo ? dAdAzrI : kazo sAmAna, koI cIja nA hoya tyAre 'hama' UbhuM thAya. kAraNa ke jIvavuM zA AdhAre ? eTale 'hama'..... ! pahelAM vastuonA AdhAre jIvato hato. te have A 'hama'nA AdhAre jIve ke 'hama, hama.' ne khAvA-pIvAnuM to ekalo hoya toya maLI Ave. pUrvanI puNye to hoya ne ? khAvA-pIvAnuM badhuM maLI Ave, ne pachI 'hama' to vadhatuM ja jAya. 'kaisA hamakuM, hamakuM saba kucha milatA hai, koI cIja milatI nahIM aisA nahIM !' alyA mile, paNa e kyAMthI maLI, e tane zuM khabara paDe ?! paNa pachI 'hama' moTuM thaI jAya. e koNa kADhI Ape ?! praznakartA : to 'hama' kema karIne jAya ? dAdAzrI : 'hama' to jatuM haze vaLI ? 'hama' to potAnI meLe UbhuM kareluM, jatuM haze ? ahaMkAra jAya, paNa 'hama' nA jAya. ahaMkAra eTale jyAM pote nathI tyAM potApaNAno Aropa karavo, enuM nAma ahaMkAra. e ahaMkAra jAya. pote karato nathI ane 'huM karuM chuM' kahe che, enuM nAma ja ahaMkAra. bAkI, 'hama' to eNe pote baccuM UbhuM kareluM, te jatuM haze !? 'hama, hama' cAlatuM ja hoya. praznakartA : e 'hama' nIkaLI jAya ? eno kaMIkeya upAya kharo ? dAdAzrI : eno upAya nathI. e to adhogatimAM jaI ane tyAM mAra khA khA kare, tyAM 'hama'kacarAya. 'hama' kyAre phUTe che ? jyAre enI pAse badhI milakata khUTe tyAre. AptavANI-9 20 te zA AdhAre jIvavuM ? e 'hama' ke 'hamArA dAdA aisA thA ne aise the.' cAlyuM 'hama' pachI. jyAre kaMI koI cIja nA hoya, tyAre 'hama'no janma thAya ! ne ahaMkAra to kaI paristhitimAM UbhuM thayuM, te paristhiti ye hoya. have ahaMkAra to kyAre ocho thAya ? ko'ka bahAravaTiyo rastAmAM kapaDAM kADhIne sAro karIne mAra mAra kare te ahaMkAra badho ocho thaI jAya. praznakartA : e pelA ajJAnI mATe vAta che ? dAdAzrI : e to ajJAnInI vAta ! jJAnamAM to ahaMkAra hoya ja nahIM ne ! ahaMkAravALAne e ahaMkAra ghaTe nahIM. ahaMkAra vadhe evAM ja badhAM sAdhano maLI Ave. paNa ghaTavAnAM sAdhanamAM AvAM koI bahAravaTiyA maLe ne sAro karIne mAre ne, to ahaMkAra UtarI jAya. agara to dasa lAkha rUpiyAnI milakata hoya ane paMdara lAkhanI khoTa gaI to ahaMkAra UtarI jAya ! praznakartA : paNa e bIjA khUNAmAM pesene, pAcho ? dAdAzrI : nA, ocho thaI jAya, vadhe nahIM. ahaMkAra ne mamatA e to sahaja prApta thayelI vastu che, e UbhI karelI vastu hoya. ane 'hama' to UbhI karelI vastu che. ahaMkAra, mAta, abhimAta.... eka tathI ! praznakartA H ahaMkAra, mAna ne abhimAna, emAM phera zo ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAranuM vistRta svarUpa e mAna kahevAya ane mamatA sahitae abhimAna kahevAya. kaMI paNa kiMcitmAtra mamatA eTale, 'A mArI moTara' kaheze, e dekhADavAnI pAchaLa zuM hoya che ? abhimAna. enAM chokarAM gorAM sarakhAM hoya to ApaNane dekhADe, 'juo, mArAM A cAreva chokarAM dekhADuM.' te pAchuM mamatA ne abhimAna ! eTale jyAM abhimAna hoya, tyAM AvuM badhuM ApaNane dekhADa dekhADa karyA kare. ane mAna eTale ahaMkAranuM vistRta svarUpa, bahuvacana thayeluM.

Page #161
271 272 AptavANI-9 mAna kahevAya. praznakartA : ahaMkArI ane mAnI, e be vacceno phera zuM ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkArIne apamAnano bho nA lAge. mAnIne apamAnano bho hoya. je mAnI hoya, tene apamAnano bho lAgyA kare. jyAre ahaMkArIne apamAnano bho nA lAge. mAna hoya to apamAna lAge ne ! mAna ja nA hoya tyAM ? praznakartA : paNa jyAre ahaMkAranuM khaMDana thAya tyAre ene apamAna lAge ne ? AptavANI-9 praznakartA : e pachI mAnamAMthI ja abhimAna janmatuM haze ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. abhimAna kyAre janme ? mamatA hoya to abhimAna janme. ahaMkAra judI dazA che ane abhimAna judI dazA che. A ApaNA lokone kazuM bhAna to che ja nahIM, kharekharuM bhAna nathI. ThokAThoka kare ! manamAM je Ave te kahe ke "A abhimAnI mANasa che, A ahaMkArI mANasa che.' te A ahaMkArI to dareka manuSyo che. koI mANasa ahaMkArI nA hoya evuM nahIM, 'jJAnI' ekalA ja ahaMkArI nahIM ane 'jJAnI'nA pholoarsa paNa ahaMkArI nahIM. bAkI, bIjA badhAya ahaMkArI. ahaMkAra eTale zuM ? je pote nathI, teno Aropa karavo. pote che e jANe nahIM ane nathI teno Aropa karavo, enuM nAma ahaMkAra. e kone kone hoya ? e pada kone kone lAgu thAya ? badhAne lAgu thAya. badhA ahaMkArI kahevAya. ahaMkAra eTale vastunA AdhAre nahIM. enI mAnyatAmAM zuM varte che ? 'je nathI evo.' 'huM "caMdubhAI" nathI paNa mAne che ke "huM caMdubhAI chuM' e ja ahaMkAra ! eTale 'pote' jo 'zuddhAtmA che' to ahaMkAra nathI. ane "caMdubhAI cho' to ahaMkAra che. pachI, A 'bAIno huM dhaNI thAuM" e bIjo ahaMkAra. A moTA dhaNI AvyA ! vahu TaiDakAvatI hoya ne pAcho dhaNI thaIne bese. vahu TaiDakAve to ya ene dhaNI kahevAya ?! pachI, 'chokarAno huM bApa thauM e trIjo ahaMkAra. badhA keTalA ahaMkAranA prakAra ? pachI e gharanuM abhimAna ke evuM kazuM nA rAkhatA hoya to ya loka kaheze ke A ahaMkAra che emano. ahaMkAra, eno kaMI guno nathI. ahaMkAra eTale to jyAM pote nathI tyAM Aropa kare che. eTalo ja guno che. bIjo koI ahaMkArano guno nathI. have mAna eTale zuM ? ke ahIM AgaLa "pharsTa kalAsa' kapaDAM paherI ane traNa hajAranuM ghaDiyALa ghAlIne, ATalI jarA bAMya UMcI rAkhe Ama, lokone dekhAya eTale. pachI koI kaheze, "kema cho zeTha ?" te A mAna dekhAya ApaNane khulluM. kAraNa ke 'igo vItha rIca maTeriyalsa,' e mAna kahevAya. enI pAse sAmAna sAro sAro zaNagArelo paheryo hoya, e dAdAzrI : nA. e to ahaMkAra bhagna karyo kahevAya. paNa A mAnI hoya to ja apamAna lAge. - jyAre abhimAna kone kahevAya ? potAnI pAse sAdhana hoya, te lokone kahI batAve. ene abhimAna kahevAya. e to dareka mANasa kahI batAve. dareka mANasa potAnI pAse hoya, te kahI batAvyA vagara rahe nahIM. eTale abhimAna kyAre kahevAya ? ke ahaMkAra to che ja, paNa dukAne jaIe tyAre rastAmAM jatAM jatAM e bhAI ApaNane kaheze ke, "UbhA raho.' 'bhaI, zuM che te UbhA raho ? utAvaLa che ne !" tyAre e kaheze, A amAruM makAna. A cAra bilDiMga, A be ane pelA be amArAM." e badhuM abhimAna kahevAya. 'bhaI, atyAre mAre javAnuM che, tuM zuM karavA vAto kare che ? tuM tArI meLe mAthAphoDa zuM karavA kare che ?" paNa e enuM abhimAna batADe che. ApaNe pUchIe nahIM toya dekhADe ke kevo sarasa che ! enuM zuM kAraNa ? ene abhimAna che. pUchIe ane javAba Ape e juduM che. ane pUchayA vagara javAba Ape e abhimAna ! enA manamAM galIpacI thayA kare ke "kyAre kahI dauM', e abhimAna. praznakartA : te abhimAnane lIdhe "ApaNuM vadhAre UMcuM ne pelAnuM nIcuM' ema bole ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, abhimAna eTale e "UMcu ne nIce.' enA purAvA Ape che ke "A mArI milakata, pelI mArI milakata, A mArI gADI."

Page #162
AptavANI-9 273 eTale 'UMcu-nIcuM' AnA uparathI kahevA mAge che. paNa sIdhI rIte, 'DAyarekTa' rIte UMcuM-nIcuM bolato nathI. abhimAna eTale potAne jarUriyAta karatAM vastu vadhAre hoya ane e dekhADe, e abhimAna. enAM manamAM ema ke 'jo huM keTalo sukhI chuM !' pelAne halako pADavA prayatna kare, enuM nAma abhimAna. eTale abhimAna to A badhuM batADe, A dekhADe, te dekhADe. are, UMcI jAtanAM doDhaso rUpiyAnAM cazmAM lAvyo hoya teya dekhADI de. 'joyAM cazmAM ?!' kaheze. alyA, mAre tArAM cazmAne zuM karavA che baLyA, te mane dekhADa dekhADa kare che ?! paNa abhimAna poSavA mATe kahe kahe kare. are, dhotiyAno joTo sADI traNasono lAvyo hoyane, te ya dekhADa dekhADa kare. doDhasonA bUTa lAvyo hoya te ya dekhADa dekhADa kare. e abhimAna ! are, eTale sudhI, ke jo jamAI bahu dekhAvaDo hoya ne ane bahu bhaNelo hoya ne, to kaheze, 'mArA jamAI tame juo, heMDo. mArA jamAI juo'. are, tArA jamAImAM zuM jovAnuM che te ? badhAMne hoya tevA jamarAM, emAM che zuM ? tyAre e kahe, 'nA, mAro jamAI joI lo.' pachI ApaNe ene kahIe ke, 'zuM dekhAvaDA che, bahu sArA jamAI maLyA.' tyAre pachI ene saMtoSa thAya. eTale pachI ApaNane jamavA hau teDI jAya, huM ke ! kaheze, 'Aja to ahIM ja jamavAnuM. jamyA vagara jazo nahIM pAchuM.' eTale jamavA hau teDI jAya. abhimAna eTale mAnanI jAherAta karavI badhe, jyAM ne tyAM. enA bhAInuM makAna nAnuM hoya toya batAve ke 'A mArA bhAInuM makAna, A mArA kAkAnuM makAna, peluM amAruM makAna.' moTuM hoya tema batAve, tyAM AgaLa abhimAna mahIM vartatuM hoya. potAnI vastu sAmAne mAna karavA mATe dekhADavI, enuM nAma abhimAna. zA sAru batAve che ? mAna sAru. pAcho mAnathI AgaLa cAlyo, e abhimAnamAM ya pAMsaro nA thAya. pachI kudarata ene mAra mAra karIne rAge pADI de. eTale be-cAra gADIo potAnI pAse hoya, paNa eno ahaMkAra nA karAya. enuM abhimAna nA karAya. abhimAna kare ke javAnI taiyArI thaI. namratA rAkhavI joIe. jema jema ApaNI pAse vizeSa sAMsArika sAdhano hoya ne, tema namratA hovI ghaTe. AptavANI-9 pAchA kaheze, 'mAre A cAra dIkarAo, A mAro chokaro sI.e. che ne mAre Ama che.' e badhuM abhimAna. 'huM goro chuM, huM jADo chuM' kahe e badhuMya abhimAna kahevAya. A badhAM zAmaLAM che ne pote goro hoya to e gorApaNAnuM ene abhimAna che. rUpano mada hoya ke nA hoya ? praznakartA : hoya. 274 dAdAzrI : potAnI bairI bahu rUpALI hoya, to eno potAne mada hoya ke 'mArI vAIpha jevI to koInI vAIpha nathI.' evuM bane ke nA bane ? praznakartA : bane che. dAdAzrI : have A rUpa rahevAnuM nathI. A rUpa kadarUpuM thatAM vAra nathI lAge evuM. ghaDIkamAM kaMI 'baLiyA bApajI' nIkaLe to zuM nIkaLe enuM rUpa ? 'baLiyA' nIkaLe to pachI rUpa rahyuM ?! game tevuM rUpALuM hoya toya ? kaMI ApaNA hAthamAM che A sattA badhI ? eTale eno ahaMkAra nA karAya. 'mArA jevo koI rUpALo nathI' e abhimAnamAM gayuM. mATe 'huM goro chuM' evuM e bole che, e ahaMkAra nathI. A loko to ahaMkArane samajatA ja nathI. ne abhimAnI to tarata oLakhAya. praznakartA : grupa phoTo jyAre pADavAno hoya tyAre abhimAna tarata ja dekhAI Ave. dAdAzrI : hA. are, pelo phoTogrAphara ja samajI jAya ke A abhimAnamAM Avyo che. paNa e phoTogrAphara amane jotAM tarata ja svIca dabAvI de. e jANe ke A bilakula abhimAna rahita dekhAya che. ane pelo abhimAnI to Ama cokkasa thaI jAya te ghaDIe. alyA, cokkasa zuM karavA thaI jAya che ?! jyAre amAre sAhajikatA hoya. praznakartA : abhimAna ahaMkAra jevuM ja ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. ahaMkAra to sAro. ahaMkAra to kADhI nakhAya. ne abhimAna to mahAduHkhadAyI. kudaratano dhaMdho zuM che ? abhimAnane ja utAravAno dhaMdho che. abhimAna vadhe ke paDyo ja che. mAre lApoTa

Page #163
AptavANI-9 275 uparathI ! ahaMkArano vAMdho nathI. abhimAna ane ahaMkAramAM phera zuM haze? 'huM caMdubhAI" e ahaMkAra. jyAM nathI tyAM tame Aropa karo ke huM chuM, enuM nAma ahaMkAra. ane A mArA baMgalA, A mArI moTaro ema dekhADe, e abhimAna ! tyAre dhoLA vALa kema nathI dekhADatA ? "juo, mArA dhoLA vALa AvyA, juo !' paNa atyAre to loka kALA karI lAve pAchA, he ! raMgI lAve ! eTale ahaMkAra to aNasamajaNathI thayelo che ane abhimAna to samajaNapUrvaka. pote garvarasa le che ke "jo A juo, A mArI vADI juo, A juo, te juo.' eTale ApaNe jANIe ke abhimAna caDyuM che Ane. have koI mANasa eka pada bole, pachI, ApaNe khuza thaI jaIe eTale e bIjAM be-traNa pada bole. to e ya abhimAna ! A abhimAna eTale tamane samajAyuM ne? ke paudgalika 'veITa'ne potAnuM 'veITa' mAnavuM te. 'huM moTo chuM' ema mAnavuM, pachI sonAnI jaNaso, ghaDiyALa, gharAM ne e badhuM je paudgalika 'veITa' che ene potAnuM 'veITa' mAnavuM, te abhimAna ! A baMgalAnuM 'veITa' che ene potAnuM ja 'veITa' e mAne. ApaNA loka to "A mArA baMgalA juo ne Ama juo ne tema juo, A mArA baMgalA kevA sarasa che." evuM bole to koI kaheze ke ahaMkAra bole che. koI kahe, "A ahaMkArI che." nA, e abhimAnI kahevAya. vastu to enI pAse che, paNa enuM AropaNa karIne potAno dekhAva karavo garva cAkhavA mATe, e abhimAna kahevAya. abhimAnamAM to, e raseya bahu mITho hoya. "A mArA baMgalA.' ema kahe ke tarata mahIM mIThAza varte. eTale pachI ene 'hevamora'nI peTha Teva paDI jAya. praznakartA: tame ekavAra kaheluM ke AkhuM jagata 'hevamora'mAM phasAyuM che. dAdAzrI: 'hevamora'mAM ! A mAre 'hevamoranI jarUra nathI, eTale huM phasAyo nathI ne ! chatAMya AIskrIma Ave tyAre huM khAuM chuM. lokono e dhyeya che, ne mAre e dhyeya vagaranI vAta che. mAro dhyeya judo che. lokone hevamora'nI pachI Teva paDI jAya che. enuM kAraNa che ke 276 AptavANI-9 ajAgRti che. e to ahIM hitAhitanuM bhAna nathI, eTale e Teva paDI jAya che. 'hebiTyueTeDa' kyAre thAya ? hitAhitanuM bhAna nA hoya tyAre 'hebiTyueTeDa' thAya. amane roja "hevamorano AIskrIma khavaDAve to amane pachI bIje dahADe e sAMbhare nahIM. mahinA mahinA sudhI roja amane khavaDAve ne pachI baMdha kare to ya amane e sAMbhare nahIM. Ama vakhANIe kharA ke 'bahu sarasa che AIskrIma' ema badhI vAto karuM, paNa badhuM suparaphaluasa !' khAI rahyA pachI svAda Apato hoya to to ame jANIe ke sarasa vastu. khAI rahyA pachI, pachI ApaNe game teTaluM kahIe ke "svAda pAcho kADho' to ya pAcho nA Ape, nahIM ? to pachI evA svAdane zuM karavAnuM ? eTale keTalAMka to svAda mATe mahIM jatA rahe che. to have che nahIM bIjuM eTale huM ene mamaLAya mamaLAya karuM moDhAmAM chello koLiyo hoya tyAre zuM karuM ? hA, paNa gaLAmAM UtarI jaze pachI Avo svAda nahIM Ave. have tamane abhimAna samajAI gayuM ? ane ahaMkAranI vAta samajAI gaI ? praznakartA: ne saMyama Ave to saMyamanI sAthe abhimAna paNa UbhuM thayA kare ne ! dAdAzrI : abhimAna hoya tyAM saMyama che ja nahIM. jyAM abhimAna hoya tyAM saMyama hoya nahIM. abhimAna AMdhaLo hoya ane saMyama hoya tyAM abhimAna to nahIM, paNa ahaMkAra paNa nA hovo joIe. dehAbhimAna, zUnyatAne pAmeluM ! abhimAna to amAre karavA jevuM hoya ke AkhA brahmAMDanA uparI ame kahevAIe. chatAMya paNa amane to nAnA bALaka karatAM ya ochuM hoya. amane to ahaMkAra hoya ja nahIM ne ! ahaMkAra hoya to A badhuM bheguM thAya ja nahIM ne ! A dehano mAlika nA hoya te brahmAMDano mAlika thaI zake. dehanuM mAlikIpaNuM, mananuM mAlikIpaNuM ne vANInuM mAlikIpaNuM nA hoya, te brahmAMDanA mAlika thAya ! praznakartA : paNa keTalAMka loko kahe che jJAnI puruSamAM ghaNI vakhata

Page #164
AptavANI-9 277 abhimAna jovAmAM Ave che. paNa e kema banI zake ? dAdAzrI : jyAM abhimAna che e jJAna nahIM ane jJAna che tyAM abhimAna nahIM. praznakartA : jJAna ne abhimAna be sAthe nA rahI zake, eno artha e thayo ne ? dAdAzrI : jJAna ne abhimAna be sAthe koI dahADo kyAreya paNa na rahe. kAM to abhimAna rahe ke jJAna ! chatAM tame mane be dhola mAro ane mane abhimAna Ave to e ajJAna che mAruM ane khulluM dekhAya ke jJAnI nhoya A. - hA, jyAM sudhI amane "jJAna" nahotuM thayuM, tyAM sudhI dehAbhimAna nahotuM gayuM. UlaTuM pAzera hatuM ne, te savAzera thayuM hatuM. jabhyo tyAre pAzera hatuM, pachI jema moTo thayo ema savAzera thatuM gayuM. pAzera hatuM teya kaiDatuM hatuM to savAzera zuM nahIM kevuM hoya ?! have abhimAna enuM nAma ke keDyA kare ane ahaMkAra enuM nAma ke je aMtaradAha bALyA kare. aMtaradAha ekalo ja baLato hoya to e ahaMkAra kahevAya ane A abhimAna to keDyA kare. te ame ahaMkAra nahIM paNa abhimAnamAM AvelA. are, tuMDamijAjI hau thayelA. ane vaLI keTalAka eme ya kahetA ke ghemarAjI bahu che. kAraNa ke amAre jJAna nahotuM thayuM to ya e pUrvano sAmAna badho evo UMco bhego thayelo, eTale mane ema kharuM ke ApaNI pAse kaMIka che. eTalI khabara kharI ane tenI jarA ghemarAjI rahyA kare. eTale ahaMkAra kyAM hovo ghaTe, abhimAna kyAM hovuM ghaTe, e badhuM kyAM ghaTe, e badhuM mArAM lakSamAM che. have Aja ahaMkArI puruSa ekaMya maLe nahIM, vikRta to thayelo ja hoya, abhimAna sudhI to gayelo ja hoya. ahaMkArI puruSa te to sAhajika kahevAya. e sahaja ahaMkAra che ane te ahaMkArI hoya ja nahIM ne, A kALamAM ! kyAMthI lAve ahaMkArI ? Aja to abhimAnI hoya. ahaMkAra to zuM che ? ke "huM caMdubhAI chuM' e 278 AptavANI-9 ja ahaMkAra che. paNa e to sAhajika vastu che. emAM eno guno nathI. ane abhimAna zuM ? ke A peluM kArakhAnuM amAruM, A davAkhAnuM ke amAruM, eTale batADa batADa karatA hoya to ApaNe samajI javuM ke A koNa bolI rahyuM che ? emanuM abhimAna bolI rahyuM che. praznakartA : paNa emAM je tame kIdhuM ke dehAbhimAna, pAzeranuM savAzera thaI gayuM. ane pachI enuM zUnya kevI rIte thayuM ? dAdAzrI : ociMtuM ja ! meM to AmAM kazuM nathI karyuM. "dhIsa Ijha baTa necarala' thaI gayuM. eTale lokone huM kahuM chuM ke nakala karavA jevI nathI A. "necarala' che, pachI emAM tuM zuM karIza ? have mArI pAse Ava, huM tane rasto dekhADIza. mane rasto jaDyo che. bAkI, huM je raste gayo chuM te raste tuM karavA jaIza to mAryo jaIza. kAraNa ke mAre to pAzerane badale savAzera thayuM, te mArAthI sahana nahotuM thatuM. e divaso kema kADhavA te to huM ja jANuM. praznakartA : peluM kahyuM che ne, 'dehAbhimAna hatuM pAzera, vidyA bhaNatAM vadhyuM zera ane guru thayo tyAM maNamAM gayo." have emAMthI zunya upara kevI rIte avAya e ja mahattvanuM. dAdAzrI : have A "jJAna" pachI tamAro puruSArtha divasa-rAta kaI bAju jaI rahyo che ? zUnya tarapha jaI rahyo che. pahelAM zuM thatuM hatuM ? ke maNano be maNa thAya, te tarapha jatuM hatuM. have zunya tarapha jaI rahyA cho. ene ApaNe ema kahIe ke have zo upAya ? to ya te kaMI vaLe nahIM. eTale atyAre paddhatisara ja che. zUnya tarapha jaI rahyo che ane e thavAnuM ja ! svarUpa jJAta pachI.. A "jJAna" pachI tamAre atyAre ahaMkAra che ja nahIM. kAraNa ke ahaMkAra kone kahevAya ? ke "huM caMdubhAI chuM' evuM nakkI karavuM, enuM nAma ahaMkAra ! ane tamane 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e jJAna upara zaMkA paDI. 'huM caMdubhAI nathI' ane 'huM to zuddhAtmA chuM', eTale have tamane ahaMkAra che ja nahIM.

Page #165
AptavANI-9 279 praznakartA : ahaMkAra eTale 'huM caMdubhAI chuM" e bhAgane ja kaho cho ? dAdAzrI : hA, ene ja ahaMkAra kahevAya. praznakartA H e ahaMkAra bhAga to nIkaLI gayo che, paNa have amAruM abhimAna rahI gayuM che ? dAdAzrI : hA, abhimAnano vAMdho nahIM. e abhimAna nikAlI bAbata che. tamane ahaMkAra rahelo ja nathI ne ! abhimAnano vAMdho nahIM. mAna ne abhimAna e nikAlI bAbata che. pachI ethI AgaLa garva ne bIjo badho sAmAna rahelo che ne ! mULa ahaMkAra gayo paNa ahaMkAranAM je pariNAma hatAM, te to hajI rahyAM ja ne ! mULa rUTa kaoNjha gayuM. paNa uparanAM haju DALAM ne e badhuM rahyuM, te sUkAI jaze. praznakartA : eTale abhimAna e jUnA ahaMkAranuM ja pariNAma che? dAdAzrI : hA. abhimAna e ahaMkAranuM pariNAma che. te pariNAma rahI gayAM, ne 'rUTa kaoNjha' gayuM. ahaMkAra gayo ! ne ahaMkAranAM badhAM pariNAma jatAM rahe eTale kevaLajJAna thAya. praznakartA : paNa ahaMkAranuM pariNAma abhimAna, to abhimAna cAlyuM jAya eTale kevaLajJAna AvIne UbhuM rahe ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. pariNAmamAM ekaluM abhimAna nA hoya. ahaMkAranAM pariNAmamAM to bIjAM badhAM bahu hoya. te badhAMya jAya eTale kevaLajJAna thAya ! 280 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : ATalo bhAva ja karavAno. bIjuM kazuM karavAnuM nahIM. 'ApaNA abhimAnathI koIne duHkha na ho ne sukha thAva' evo bhAva karavAno. pachI du:kha thaI jAya to pratikramaNa karavAnAM ne AgaLa ThaMDavA mAMDavAnuM. tyAre zuM kare che ?! kaMI AkhI rAta tyAM ApaNe besI rahevuM ? besI rahevAya evuM nathI A pAchuM. ApaNe besI rahevuM hoya to ya besAya evuM nathI, to zuM karavAnuM ? chatAM A lokone duHkha nA thAya evI rIte ApaNe pagaluM bharavuM joIe. praznakartA : e hisAbe to Akho saMsAra ahaMkAranA pariNAma ja che, 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' enuM pariNAma ja Akho saMsAra ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa have e ahaMkAra, A 'jJAna' pachI tamane gayo. pharI ahaMkAra raheto hoya to pariNAma UbhAM thayAM kare ne ! A "jJAna" pachI to navAM pariNAma UbhAM thAya nahIM ne ! ane jUnAM pariNAma UDyAM ja kare, jUnAM ekalAM ja UDI javAnAM. eTale Ukela AvI gayo. e TAMkI navI bharAtI nathI. koInI TAMkI pacAsa gelananI hoya ne koInI paccIsa lAkha gelananI hoya. moTI TAMkI hoya tyAre vAra lAge. paNa khAlI thavA mAMDyuM, ene zuM ! praznakartA : paNa TAMkI khAlI thatAM thatAM to pelAM phelaDa(pUra)nI mAphaka koIne gabaDAvI de, koIne athaDAya ne koIne mArI dene, pAchuM. dAdAzrI : hA, e to badhuM je mAre che ne, te to enAM pariNAma che ne ! emAM ApaNane zuM levA-devA ? paNa koIne duHkha thAya to enuM pratikramaNa karI levAnuM. svamAta eTale... praznakartA : mAna ane svamAna vacce bheda zuM ? dAdAzrI : mAna eTale 'igo vItha rIca maTerIyalsa." ane svamAna eTale potAnI je kavaoNliTI' che ne eTalA pUratuM ja mAna ! potAne je praznakartA : to ahaMkAranAM pariNAma kayA kayA ? dAdAzrI : badhAM bahu jAtanAM pariNAma hoya. praznakartA : amArAM e abhimAnathI koIne takalIpha nA thAya ane saMtApa nA thAya, ene badale sAmAne sukha thAya, ene mATe amAre zuM karavAnuM ?

Page #166
AptavANI-9 281 'kavaoNliTI' 'phIksa' che eTalA pUratuM ja mAna ke 'bhAI, grejyueTa thayo chuM.' te 'grejayueTa' pUratuM ja mAna. e svamAna potAnuM, pote je che evuM mAgaNI kare. ethI vadhAre nathI mAgato. e svamAna bhaMga thAya tyAre ene lAge ke 'huM grejyueTa thayo chuM ne vaLI A zuM kahe che ?!" eTale 'grejayueTa' che eTalA pUratuM ja. ane te ene mATe yogyatA dharAve che, eTale ene chaMcheDavo nA joIe. svamAna bhaMga nA karavuM joIe koInuM. ane mAna eTale zuM ? ke enI pAse 'DIgrI' ke 'kavaoNliTI' nathI e jovAnuM nahIM, ne guNanI vAta to kyAM gaI paNa 'Igo vItha rIca maTerIyalsa' e mAna, traNa hajAranuM ghaDiyALa che, cazmA sonAnI phremavALA che, loMgakoTa sarasa paheryo hoya, e badhuM mAna ! praznakartA : e 'Igo' ghavAyo ane svamAna ghavAvuM, e be vacce taphAvata kharo ? dAdAzrI : bahu ja ! svamAna ghavAyuM eTale to sAmo mANasa vera vALe. 282 AptavANI-9 abhimAna le ane koIka mANasane utArI pADavA mATe abhimAna kare to ? dAdAzrI : e badhuM abhimAna gaNAtuM nathI. praznakartA : to e be vacceno taphAvata zuM ? dAdAzrI : mAna ane abhimAna e 'vItha rIca maTerIyalsa' ! praznakartA : eTale mAna ane abhimAna e sAdhana-saMpatti sAthe joDAyelAM che ? dAdAzrI : hA, bIjAM koI nahIM. ajJAtadazAno zreSTha saguNa ! praznakartA svamAna ane abhimAna e be vacceno bheda ? dAdAzrI : svamAna eTale e kyA prakAranuM mAna ? mane koI saheje saLI nA kare evA prakAranuM mAna ane A mArI sthiratAne koI DagAve nahIM. svamAna to mANasa, koI potAne saLI nA kare eTalA pUratuM ja rAkhe che. ne abhimAnI eTale to, koI abhimAnI hoya ne, te zuM kaheze ke, 'A ahIMthI ApaNo baMgalo zarU thayo, te paNe sudhI baMgalo che. temAM pAchaLa to tame joyuM ja nathI. pachI enI choDInI jaNaso karAvI hoya ne, te badhI ApaNane dekhADe. enuM abhimAna poSAya eTalA mATe dekhADe. pachI, enI jamIna hoya te badhI dekhADe ke "A basso vIghAM jamIna mArI che." ane abhimAnI hoya ne, te Akho dahADo arIsAmAM jo jo kare ke huM kevI rUpALo chuM ! ane loko kahe che ke, amArA bApa-dAdA Ama ne tema ne kuLavAna. e badhA abhimAnI. ene svamAnI nA kahevAya. svamAnI to vyavahArathI levuM-devuM emAM hoya. svamAna eTale sAmAnuM svamAna rAkhavuM ane tene badale potAnuM svamAna prApta karavuM, enuM nAma svamAna kahevAya. eTale saMsAra vyavahAramAM svamAna e to vyavahAra che. svamAna bhaMga nA thAya tyAM sudhI calAvI levuM paDe. jo ke ApaNane to A mokSamArga maLyo eTale ApaNane svamAnanI to vAta praznakartA : ane 'Igo' ghavAya to vera vALe nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA, kazuM ya nahIM. 'igo'no vAMdho nathI. paNa A zrImaMtone 'igo' hoto ja nathI ne ! 'igo' haMmezA garIbone ekalAne ja hoya che. ApaNe jene kahIe chIe ne, "cAla nAlAyaka' to ya kazuM ya asara nahIM, enuM nAma 'Igo'. chatAM ekaluM evuM ke nahIM. 'igo' asare ya thAya ane asara nA ye thAya. 'igo' asara kare ya kharo, te vakhate kApI ye nAkhe ane asara nA ye thAya. paNa A zrImaMtone ekalo 'igo' nA hoya. praznakartA : to zrImaMtomAM zuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : zrImaMtone mAna hoya, abhimAna hoya, svamAna hoya, e badhuM jAtajAtanuM hoya. emane 'igo' vItha(sAthe) badhuM hoya. ane pelAM garIbone 'igo' vItha kazuM nA hoya bicArAM pAse. praznakartA : koI mANase koI sAruM kArya karyuM hoya to enuM

Page #167
AptavANI-9 283 ja nA hoya. paNa saMsAra vyavahAra svamAna sudhI sAcavavo joIe. nahIM to naphaphaTa kahevAya. svamAnazIla to hovuM ja joIe ne ! ajJAnImAM ya eTaluM to hovuM ja joIe. eTalI 'bAunDrI' to joIe ne ! 'bAunDrI'nI bahAra, evuM te kema cAle ?! svamAna eTale apamAna nA thAya e mATenuM rakSaNa karavuM te. svamAna e to bahu moTAmAM moTI cIja che, ajJAna dazAnI sadguNanI 'limiTa' che ! svamAnane to ame bahu vakhANyuM che, A hisAbe ke ajJAnadazAnI sadguNanI 'limiTa' ! ajJAnadazAmAM sadguNa to hoya ne ? tenI A 'limiTa'! praznakartA : svamAna kSamya che ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : A 'jJAna' lIdhuM hoya ne, eTale svamAna kSamya che. nahIM to svamAne ya rAkhavuM joIe ja. ajJAnadazAmAM ya svamAna to rAkhavuM joIe ne ! svamAna nA hoya to lIphTa thaI jAya pAcho. lIphTa thaI jAya eTale 'bAunDrI' cUkI jAya. praznakartA : paNa svamAnamAM ahano aMza kharo ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : bhale, e aham to che ja jANe. paNa to ya lIphTa nA thaI jAya. svamAnane laIne 'bAunDrI'mAM rahe, 'bAunDrI' cUke nahIM e koI dahADoya. eTale ajJAnadazAmAM ya svamAnanI jarUra che. praznakartA : have darekanuM potAnuM svamAna to hoya. eTale svamAna to ApaNe ApaNuM rAkhavuM joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : A 'jJAna' lIdhuM, have svamAna zenuM rAkhavAnuM ? have svamAna kazuM nA hoya. praznakartA : paNa prasaMgopAta kaMIka evo prasaMga banyo. tyAre ApaNe ApaNuM svamAna rAkhavuM joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa svamAna ne ApaNe levAdevA nA hoya. mAna ne svamAna badhuM ya gayuM. evuM che, 'sva' badalAyeluM nA hoya, ene svamAna 284 AptavANI-9 rAkhavAnuM. A to 'sva' ja badalAI gayuM tyAM AgaLa ! 'sva' badalAI gayuM ene svamAna hoya ke ? samajaNa nA paDI tamane ? praznakartA : paNa DrAmeTika svamAna to rAkhavuM joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : e to rahe ja. jeTaluM rahe e sAcuM. bAkI, svamAna rAkhavAnI jarUra nathI. e pAcho ApaNe kyAM dhaMdho mAMDIe, navo vepAra !! svamAna eTale, ApaNe 'caMdubhAI' chIe ane te potAnuM mAna sAcavavuM. paNa jyAM sudhI ApaNe 'caMdubhAI' chIe tyAM sudhI. ane ApaNe zuddhAtmA thayA, to e vAta ja kyAM rahI ?! A 'jJAna' pachI 'pote' 'AtmA' thayo. pachI svamAna ja kyAM rahyuM ?! svamAna to, dehAdhyAsanuM mAna, enuM nAma svamAna. paNa 'ApaNe' 'AtmA' thayA pachI svamAna rahyuM ja kyAM ? paNa A nikAlI bAbatanuM svamAna rahe. nikAlI bAbatanI ApaNe levAdevA nahIM ne ! abhimAtI : mithyAbhimAtI ! praznakartA : abhimAna ane mithyAbhimAna vacce zuM pharaka ? dAdAzrI : abhimAna to, A gharAM enAM potAnAM hoya ane pratyakSa dekhADe e abhimAna kahevAya. ane mithyAbhimAnavALAne to, bhaIne khAvAnuM ye ThekANuM nA hoya ne bahAra lokone kaheze, 'amAre to badhI Ama sAhebI che.... ne evI badhI ThokAThoka kare. evA loka nahIM joyelA ? ApaNA lokoya kahe ke e mithyAbhimAnI che. mithyA eTale kazuM che nahIM ane abhimAna kare che, baNagAM phUMke che. jyAre abhimAnI to, ene loko jANe ke, 'nA, bhaI milakatavALo che te abhimAna kare che. abhimAna karavA lAyaka che. paNa emaNe abhimAna nA karavuM joIe, emaNe nA bolavuM joIe.' abhimAnI eTale vadhAre paDatuM ApaNe mAna ene ApIe ja. kAraNa ke zrImaMta che ne ! paNa e bolyo eTale ApaNA manamAM kaDavuM lAge ke 'tuM jAte kema bolyo ? ame vAha vAha karIe, te tAre sAMbhaLavAnI.'

Page #168
286 AptavANI-9 bhAI koTa paherIne pharato hato. te tamane manamAM thAya paNa kharuM ke A koTa mArA jevo, ne ahIM AgaLa DAgha hato, teno te DAthe ya che A. paNa e bhAIne zuM kahevAya ApaNAthI ? evI A duniyA che. rAI bharI magajamAM ! AptavANI-9 285 enuM nAma mithyAbhimAta praznakartA : mithyAbhimAna mATe kaMIka dAkhalo kaho ne ! dAdAzrI : mithyAbhimAna eTale zuM? gharAM hoya nahIM ne pAcho kahe, A badhI mArI milakata ghaNI che.' eka paTela gADImAM beThA hatA. te amArA gAmanA ja hatA. joDe eka koI gAmaDAno mANasa haze, te sAro mANasa hato. teNe pUchayuM, 'kAkA, kyAM jAva cho ?" tyAre bhaI kahe, 'bhAdaraNa jAuM chuM.' 'tyAM keTalA dahADA rahezo ?" pelAe pUchayuM. tyAre paTela kahe, 'bhAI, rahevAnuM to dasa-bAra dahADA ja che. paNa be dahADA to mAre ghara sApha karatA thaze." ghara sApha karavAmAM eka kalAka-be kalAka thaI jAya'. pelA bhAIe kahyuM, tyAre paTele kahyuM, 'bhAI, nIcenA oraDAM ja vALatAM be-cAra kalAka thAya. pachI bIjo mALa, trIjo mALa, badhAno kacaro kADhavAno. vaLI bAtharUmo dhovAnI, phalANuM dhovAnuM. godaDAM so-doDhaso haze, te pAchAM sApha karavAnAM.' Ama emaNe to phADa phADa karyuM. pelAe paNa sAMbhaLa sAMbhaLa karyuM. jo citara citara karyuM ! doDhaso godaDAM (!). pachI emanAM 'vAIpha" mane AvIne kahetAM hatAM, "juone, A to AvuM bolatA hatA." tyAre emanAM dhaNIe mane zuM kahyuM? 'huM badhuM pelAne kaheto hato, te ANe mArI tyAM AbarU bagADI nAkhI. ANe kahI dIdhuM ke evuM badhuM kazuM nathI. tame mAnazo nahIM. huM AbarU bAMdhato hato, huM AbarU vadhArato hato, tyAre ANe AbarU mArI toDI nAkhI." alyA, AmAM kyAM AbarU vadhavAnI te ? konI AbarU vadhavAnI ? zuM A tophAna ! A mithyAbhimAna. bhADAnA gharamAM rahevuM ane moTI moTI vAto karavI ! are, lUgaDAM ye bhADAnAM laI Ave, pachI ? 'hamArA do baMgalA hai aura kheta to baDA hai, vo bagIcA hai aMdara.' koTa istrIbaMdha hoya, paNa te bhADAno. te ApaNo koTa dhobIne tyAM hoya ane dhobI pelAne bhADe Ape. pachI ko'kano paherelo koTa ApaNe paheravAno pAcho. te dekha, A duniyA to jo ! ane ApaNe kahIe ke koInuM pahereluM huM paheruM nahIM. AvI duniyA cAle che aMdara. joI lIdheluM meM badhuM. tame oLakho ya kharAM ke A loko zuM kahe che ? 'tArA magajamAM baTAkA bharyA che." hA, koInA magajamAM rAI bharelI hoya, koInAM magajamAM baTAkA bharyA hoya ! praznakartA : dAdA, rAI kema kIdhI haze ? dAdAzrI : pelo bole evuM te lhAya jevuM hoya. evuM bole ke ApaNane AdhAzIzI caDhI jAya, heDeka thaI jAya. praznakartA : AvI rAI to badhAnAM magajamAM bharelI ja hoya. dAdAzrI : ema ?! kharuM kaho cho. gujarAtamAM rAI sastI ne ! eTale loka khAya ne ! have rAI UtarI gaI ke nathI UtarI gaI ? praznakartA : hA, nIkaLI gaI. dAdAzrI : nIkaLI gaI, basa. eTale nIveDo AvI gayo. praznakartA : rAI bharelI eTale abhimAna vadhAre hoya, enuM nAma rAI bharelI ne ? dAdAzrI : abhimAnavALA judA ane rAIvALA judA ! rAIvALAne kazI milakata ja nA hoya. abhimAna karavA jevuM nA hoya to ya rAI bahu hoya, magajamAM rAI bharelI hoya. ane abhimAna to koNa karI zake ? ahIM AgaLa jene pAMca-daza moTA moTA makAno hoya e abhimAna karI zake. enI pAse kaMI evI sagavaDa hoya, eka nAnA gAmanI esTeTane evuM hoya, te abhimAna kare. A game te eka phaleTa hoya pAMca- paccIsa lAkhano, ne e rAI caDhAve eno zo artha che te ?! game eTaluM sarakAra kanaDe to ya enA vaibhavamAM bIjuM nukasAna nA thAya, vakhate e abhimAna kare to cAle.

Page #169
AptavANI-9 287 bIjA lokone mAna rAkhavAno adhikAra kharo, ke bhaI mAre jo, phaleTa gharano che, mAre gADI gharanI che. e mAna rAkhavAno adhikAra kharo. bAkI, abhimAna rAkhavAnuM kaMI kAraNa nathI. abhimAna to, sTeTa hoya tyAre abhimAne zuM phAyado kADhyo ? sTeTa jatuM rahyuM ne, UlaTuM ?! ane te abhimAna rAkhavAthI moTo tAja kevo hoya ? kAMTALo tAja hoya. kyAre A koI lazkara Avaze ne kyAre caDhI Avaze e kahevAya nahIM. enAM karatAM tAja vagarano sAro. A to hamaNe enuM nAma phaleTa kahe che. nahIM to mALA kahetA hatA. cakalIno mALo hoya ne ? ke kabUtarano mALo, koI cakalIno mALo, popaTano mALo ! DabalarUma hoya to ya dIvAnakhAnuM kahe. 288 AptavANI-9 have e svIkAra nahIM karatA hoya eTale pAro nA caDhe. paNa pachI meM kahyuM, 'tamArAmAM mAna nathI rahyuM ne ? te have tharmomiTara muko ke bhaI. tAva caDhyo ke Utaryo ?" tyAre e kahe che, "e zuM tharmomiTara ?" meM kahyuM, 'hamaNe paMdara-vIsa jaNa sagAvahAlAM beThAM hoya, ane tamane kahe ke 'tamArAmAM jarAya chAMTo ya akkala nathI.' e asara thaI gaIne ! alyA, kyAM gayuM? tAruM mAna nahotuM ne ? apamAna jevuM mAna nathI koI. pelA mAnanI to kiMmata ja nathI. paNa apamAna jevuM koI mAna nathI. apamAna jenAthI sahana nathI thatuM e ja moTo mAnI. pelA loko Ape e mAna to sahana thaI zake. jyAre apamAna sahana nathI thatuM e moTAmAM moTuM mAna che. e moTo mAnI kahevAya. mArI pAse tharmomiTara badhI jAtanAM che. koI paNa Avyone, to huM tharmomiTara mUkI dauM. tharmomiTara vastu evI che ke tarata khyAlamAM AvI jAya. mAta mApavAnuM tharmomiTara ! praznakartA : bahAranA koI "maTiriyalsa' sivAyanuM paNa mAna kharuM ne ? A sAdhuo, saMnyAsIone kazAya maTiriyalsa nathI hotAM, chatAMye emane mAna jabarajasta hoya che e kayuM mAna ? dAdAzrI : emane mAna che te koI pustaka-zAstra jANuM chuM e badhuM hoya. A paNa eka milakata ja kahevAya ne ? zAstra badhuM huM jANuM chuM, e milakata ja kahevAya ne ?! e badhAM 'maTiriyalsa' ja kahevAya. e badhuM mAna ja hoya che. praznakartA ane koI kazuMya nA jANato hoya to ya ene mAna bahu rahyA kare, evuMya bane. dAdAzrI : hA, evuM hoya. kAraNa ke, e mAnI beTho che ne ! koI paNa mANasa mAna Ape to e svIkAra nA kare, manathI svIkAra nA kare eTale eno pAro na caDhe pachI. eTale e enI jAtane mAnI beTho ke have mArAmAM mAna rahyuM nathI. kAraNa ke pelA loko mAna Ape to emane bahu asara thAya nahIM, pote mahIM svIkAra nA kare. ane e vartana evuM rAkhe ke pelA lokone khoTuM lAge nahIM. eTale manamAM ne manamAM e jANe ke mAro pAro caDhato nathI, mATe have mAna rahyuM nathI. nahIM to pAro caDhI ja jAya ne ? lokoe 'Ama karyuM ane pote svIkAra karyo, eTale pAro caDhyo ja ne ! eTale amathAM manamAM mAnI beThAM che eTaluM ja che, zekhacallInI peTha ke Ama paiNIzuM ne Amatema, eka ghaDAne lIdhe A badho eno saMsAra Ubho karyo ne ?! ke Ama bakarI lAvIza, ne Ama phalANuM lAvIza ne zAdI karIza ne chokaro thaze ne pachI kahevA Avaze ke, "heMDo pappA jamavA." te huM eno ghaDo ja pADI nAkhuM eTale enuM badhuM UDI jAya ! ghaDo paDI gayo eTale kazuM rahe nahIM pachI, te huM ghaDo pADI nAkhuM haDahaDATa. eTale paiNavAnuM rahyuM, chokarAM rahyAM, bakarI ye rahI, badhuM ya rahyuM ! paNa zuM kare che ?! emAM emano doSa nathI. badhAM ja AvuM mAnI beThelAM che. saMto ya vagara kAmanA mAnI beThelAM che. kaMI badhAM ya kharAba saMto hoya che evuM nathI. saMto ya ghaNA sArA hoya che. sArA eTale ke jene "bApajI, bApajI' karo eTale khuza ! bIjuM paisAnI kaMI paDelI nahIM, viSayonI paDelI nahIM. 'bApajI" kaho eTale khuza. paNa te manamAM mAnI bese ke 'have kazuM amane taMdra rahyuM nathI.' baMdhAtIta thaI beThAM che ne ?! hamaNe A eka vAtamAM to pANI pANI thaI jazo, eka ja akSaramAM. to pachI bIjA akSaro Avaze tyAre zuM ?! eka akSaramAM to phATI jAva cho. A so maNa dUdha hoya ne, te pAMca zera-daza zera mIThuM to ema ne ema khAI jAya, to ya phATe nahIM. ane A to

Page #170
AptavANI-9 289 eka ja akSaramAM phATI jAya. nirmAtI : tiahaMkArI H nirmohI ! are, atyAre to keTalAka sAdhuo nirmAnI thaIne phare che. te nA cAle. nirmAnI joyelA ke tame ? nirmAnI eTale nirahaMkArI kahevAya ne ? praznakartA : hA, nirahaMkArI. dAdAzrI : jo jo evuM bolatA (!) nirmAnIne nirmAnI ahaMkAra hoya, 'huM nirmAnI chuM' evo ahaMkAra hoya ane mAnI lokone mAnI ahaMkAra hoya. A mAnIno ahaMkAra sAro, paNa nirmAnIno ahaMkAra to kyA avatAre dhozo ? nirmAnIpaNuM e sUkSma ahaMkAra che, te peThA pachI nIkaLe nahIM koI dahADo ya. 'nirmAnI chuM, huM nirmAnI chuM. ame nirmAnI chIe" kaheze. te nirmAnI thaI beTho. enI pAchaLa sUkSma ahaMkAra che. enAM karatAM A sthaLa sAro ke loko kahI Ape ke, "alyA, A tamAro ATalo pAvara che, tene lIdhe chAtI kADhIne pharo cho ke ?" evuM kahe ke nahIM ? ane pelAne to koI kahenAra ja maLe nahIM. koI vaDhanAra ja maLe nahIM ne ! e pachI vadhyA ja kare dahADe dahADe. eTale mAre moDhe kahevuM paDe che ke jarA samajo, nahIM to rakhaDI marazo. nirahaMkArI thavuM paDaze. nirmAnIpaNuM nA cAle. tame samajyA ne, nirmAnI eTale zuM ? A tamane 'jJAna' ApIe eTale nirahaMkArI thAva. peluM nirmAnI e pAcho moTo ahaMkAra che. e lapharuM bahu moTuM che baLyuM. A mAnanuM lapharuM to sAruM. e bhoLuM che lapharuM. te koI kahI Ape ya kharAM ke, 'alyA, chAtI zAnI kADho cho ATalI badhI ?" kahe ke nA kahe ? are, tame ja pelAne kaho ne, ke "huM kAma karato houM to AvI chAtI vagarano pharuM chuM ne tame chAtI zAne kADho cho ?" paNa nirmAnIne to koI kahenAra ja nahIMne ! mAna-bAna kazuM ye nahIM. nirmAnIpaNuM e to sUkSma ahaMkAra che, eTale zuM ? ke uparanAM zIMgaDA kApI nAkhyAM, paNa mahIMnA zIMgaDAM rahyAM. A to aMdaranA ya zIMgaDAM nahIM cAle ne uparanA ya zIMgaDAM nahIM cAle ! aMdaranA zIMgaDA aMdaranI keDa UbhI kare. ane bahAra kaiDa to hoya 290 AptavANI-9 nahIM ne, emane. emane badhAM sAphasUpha karI Ape, nokara-cAkaro hoya, te mAkaNa-macchara kADhI Ape. te bahAra kaiDe nahIM kazuM ya pachI. paNa aMdaranI keDa zI rIte choDaze tamane ? aMdaranI keDa to kharekharI keDa che. tame joyelI ke nahIM koI dahADo aMdaranI keDa ? praznakartA : joyelI, anubhavelI. dAdAzrI : eTale nirahaMkArI thavuM paDaze, nirmAnIpaNuM nA cAle. praznakartA : e to dAdA, bIjo eka zabda paryAya tarIke, nirmohI. dAdAzrI : nirmohI zabda "phula' che ja nahIM. nirmohI eTale saMpUrNa moha vagarano, evuM nathI. nirmohI e saMpUrNa moha vagaranA mANasa mATe kahevAya nahIM. jene moha kSaya thaI gayo, tene nirmohI nA kahevAya. eTale nirmohI e moha kSaya dazA nathI. phakta anAsakta zabda ekalo calAvI zakAya, nirmohI nahIM. nirmohI kyAM sudhI ? ahaMkAre karIne moha je dUra karyo, tene nirmohI kahevAya. ahaMkAre karIne je mAna dUra karyuM, ene nirmAnI kahevAya. eTale ahaMkAra to pote che, ne bIjuM badhuM ochuM karyuM. koIke gALa bhAMDI 'mAre zuM levAdevA ?" kaheze. paNa ahaMkAra to teno te khaDo rahyo. nirmohIpaNAno ahaMkAra rahyo, nirmAnIpaNAno ahaMkAra rahyo. e ahaMkAra to chevaTe kADhavo paDaze ne !! mAnIno ahaMkAra to "jJAnI" ogALI Ape. paNa nirmAnIno ahaMkAra to bhagavAnathIye ogaLe nahIM, evo sUkSma ahaMkAra che. e sUkSma ahaMkAra Ubho thAya to mAryA jazo. mATe koIkane pUchIne karajo. kRpALudeve eTalA mATe lakhyuM che ke A jagatamAM mokSa zAthI nathI thato ? tyAre kahe che ke A lobha ke bIjI kazI bhAMjagaDa ja nathI. paNa jo mAna nA hota to ahIM ja mokSa thaI jAta ! e to lokone uttejanA mATe lakheluM che, 'vyupoInTa" dekhADyuM che. vAta karekTa che. te ajJAnI lokone dekhADyuM che ke bIjuM badhuM haze ne, te joI levAze. paNa mAna upara ja lakSa rAkhazo. mAna ja A saMsAranuM mukhya kAraNa che.

Page #171
AptavANI-9 291 sat puruSa e ja ke jete... kRpALudeve to zuM kahyuM, ke sat puruSa e ja ke, nizadina jene AtmAno upayoga che. eTale niraMtara kAyamane mATe upayoga cUke nahIM, eka sekanDe ya cUke nahIM, enuM nAma sat puruSa kahevAya. pachI zAstramAM nathI, sAMbhaLyAmAM nathI, chatAM anubhavamAM Ave evI jenI vANI che. jenI vANI navuM zAstra lakhAya evI hoya. jene nizadina AtmAno upayoga che. eno eka ja zabda sAMbhaLavAmAM Ave to mokSe cAlyo jAya. kAraNa ke vacanabaLa sahita che. aMtaraMga spRhA nathI evI jenI gupta AcaraNA che. bAkI to evAM badhAM anaMta guNo che ! tyAM sat puruSa che. kRpALudeve eTale sudhI lakhyuM ne ke, saMsAra kevaLa azAtAmaya che...... eka aMza zAtAthI karIne pUrNa kAmatA sudhInI sarvasamAdhi tenuM sat puruSa ja kAraNa che. ATalI badhI samarthatA chatAM jene kaMI paNa spRhA nathI, unmattatA nathI, potApaNuM nathI,garva nathI, gAravatA nathI, evA AzcaryanI pratimAMrUpa sat puruSane ame pharI pharI nAmarUpe smarIe chIe." .spRhA nathI praznakartA : e spRhA nathI kahyuM, eTale kaI rItanI ? dAdAzrI : zrImad rAjacaMdra 'spRhA nathI' kahyuM. to nispRhI evA ghaNA che ApaNA hindustAnamAM. to evA kAma lAge ? nA. nispRhIo kAma nA lAge. spRhA nA hoya evA mANaso ahIM pAchA pAra vagaranA che, nispRhI. 292 AptavANI-9 ApaNA loka lAlacu che, te A lokonuM gADuM cAlyA kare. ane 'vyavasthita'no niyama che. ene khAvA-pIvAnuM game te raste, e gALo de toya pelo ApI jAya. eTale jIvato to rahe ne ! 'vyavasthita'no niyama che, khAvAnuM pahoMcADyA vagara rahe nahIM. are, chevaTe eme ya kahe, 'bAvAnuM magaja evuM che, paNa Apo ene.' gALo khAIne ya ApI Ave. have je kahe che, 'hamaku kucha nahIM cAhiye.' A ya spRhA ja kahevAya che. e ya eka jAtano ahaMkAra che, nispRhI ! evAM nispRhI joyelA koI ? meM joyelA AvA ya. eka nispRhI Avyo hato, te tALuM dekhADato hato. kANuM pADIne tALuM mAreluM ! ane pachI kapaDAM kADhIne mane kahe che, "dekho." alyA bhaI, indriyane tALuM zuM kAma mAryuM ? bicArI indriyoe zuM guno karyo, te Ane tALuM mAthuM ?! A to te dahADe jJAna nahIM eTale A bAjuno pakSa jarA kaDaka thaI jAya. meM kahyuM, 'A zenAM sAruM tame ahIM padhAryA cho ? zenAM sAruM Ama karo cho ne AvuM darzana karAvo cho ?" tyAre e kahe, 'tALA lagAyA, nahIM dekhatA hai ?" meM kahyuM, 'dekhA bhAI. eka jagaha pe kyuM lagAyA ? Idhara pIche bhI lagA do." tyAre e kahe, 'hamArI sAtha aisA bolatA hai ?" meM kahyuM, 'tamAre zuM joIe che e kaho." tyAre e kahe, 'pAMca rUpiyA abhI kA abhI de do.' kahyuM, 'bhaI, dabaDAvyAnA rUpiyA mArI pAse nathI. mArI pAse vinaMtInA rUpiyA che. tame mAgo teTalA rUpiyA che mArI pAse. bAkI tame dabaDAvo, tenA rUpiyA mArI pAse nathI. nahIM to mArA gurue kahyuM che ke je mAge tene Apajo, dabaDAve tene nA Apazo.' tyAre e kahe, 'aisA karegA ? aisA karegA ?" meM kahyuM, 'Apa to baDA loga, kucha bhI kara zako aisA. hamArI pAse to kucha nahIM. hama kyA karegA ? aura jo paisA hai, vo mAganevAle ke liye hai.' 'hamAre liye kucha bhI nahIM ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, 'eka rUpiyA le jAva." pachI e pAMsaruM nA bolyo ne, eTale jhAMpAnI bahAra nIkaLyA, pachI meM kahyuM, 'Avo padhAro." pachI cA mukAvaDAvI ne pAI, ne pAMca rUpiyA ApyA. eka rUpiyo pelo ne e pAMca rUpiyA vadhAre bIjA. eTale bolyo nahIM pachI. eTale nispRha thayelA to 'hamaku kyA ? hamaku kyA ?' karyA kare. te A bAbAo che te badhA nispRha, tadana spRhA nahIM. 'hamaku kyA, hamaku kucha nahIM cAhiye.' te koI dUdha laI jAya ne, tyAre e zuM jANe ke, 'bApajI rAjI thaze, heMDone. koIka dahADo kAma thaze. mArAM chokarAMne ghera chokaro nathI.' tyAre pelA zuM kaheze, 'hamako kucha nahIM cAhiye, cale jAva idharase. kyU AyA ?" te AvaDI AvaDI gALo hau Ape. paNa

Page #172
293 AptavANI-9 eya rakhaDI maryA ane badhAne rakhaDAvI mAryA. ane 'jJAnI puruSa' kevA hoya ? tamArA AtmA saMbaMdhI spRhAvALA hoya, ane bahAra tamAruM je bhautikamAM che tenA nispRhI. bhautikamAM koI cIja joItI nA hoya, ane enAM AtmAnuM kema kalyANa thAya eTalI ja spRhA hoya. hA, saMpUrNa nispRha nathI. eTale ame 'jJAnI puruSa' nispRha-saspRha chIe. eTale zuM ? A kAMTho ya amAro hoya ane A bIjo kAMTho ya amAro hoya. ame tArAM pudgalamAM nispRha chIe ane tArAM AtmAne mATe saspRha chIe. eTale tuM amane gALo bhAMDe to ya ame tArI joDe spRhA rAkhIe. enuM kAraNa zuM ? ke tArA AtmAne mATe saspRha chIe. e vAMkuM kare ne, e apamAna kare ne, to ya ame ene mATe rakSaNa mUkIe bicArAne. tamane samajAyuM ne ? ....utmatatA nathI pachI bIjo kayo guNa ? praznakartA : unmattatA nathI. dAdAzrI : hA. unmattatA eTale zuM ? Apane samajAya che ? huM tamane tamArI bhASAmAM dekhADI dauM. 294 AptavANI-9 gajavAmAM pAMca hajAra AvyA, te pAchuM A cakyuM ! unmatta thaI jAya. ene roga peTho che A, unmattatAno roga ! eTale e rIMgaNuM thaI gayuM pAchuM 'TAITa' ! nahIM to 'A' thaI jAya rIMgaNuM. bolo have, e pAMca hajAra jo mANasane 'TAITa' karatuM hoya, mANasa unmatta thaI jAya, to amane to, 'jJAnI puruSa'ne to AkhA bhagavAna ja vaza thaI gayelA che ! bolo, amAre 'TAITa' keTaluM badhuM hoya ?! paNa to ya unmattatA nathI jarAya. e ajAyabI ja che ne ! pAMca hajAra jo ATaluM 'TAITa' karatA hoya, to bhagavAna - Akho traNa lokano nAtha, jene vaza thato hoya te kevA 'TAITa' hoya ?! paNa nA, kharI laghutA tyAM ja hoya ! ame to nAnA bALaka jevA hoIe. ....potApaNuM nathI ! pachI trIjuM kayuM vAkya lakhe che ? praznakartA : potApaNuM nathI. dAdAzrI : potApaNuM eTale huM chuM ne A mAruM che ! potApaNuM nathI eTale A zarIra e potAnuM che ja nahIM. A zarIra ja mAruM nathI eTale zarIrane lagatI badhI vastuo mArI che ja nahIM. A mana mAruM nathI, A vANI mArI nathI. A je bole che ne, teya mArI vANI nathI. A orijinala TeparekarDa bole che. e vaktA che, tame zrotA cho ne huM jJAtAdraSTA chuM. A ApaNA traNano vyavahAra che. vANInA ame mAlika nathI. A zarIranAM ame mAlika nathI. A mananA ame mAlika nathI. garva mIThAzathI Ubho saMsAra ! praznakartA : garva eTale zuM ? garva ane abhimAna, emAM kaMI phera kharo ? dAdAzrI : abhimAna ne garva beu sAmasAmAM trAjavAmAM mUkIe to keTaluM thAya ? eka bAju trAjavAmAM garva mUkIe ne eka bAju abhimAna mUkIe to zuM thAya ? sarakhuM vajana thAya ? abhimAna pA ratala thAya ane A loko ahaMkAra to kevo kare che ? ahIMthI Ama jato hoya ne, tyAre sIdho 'sTreITa phoravarDa'nI rIte jato hoya, Ama sAhajika rIte paddhatisara cAlatA hoya. ane pAcho Avato hoya, te ghaDIe ApaNe jANIe ke A AnAmAM kema pheraphAra thaI gayelo lAge che ? 'phesa" badalAyelo lAge ApaNane pAcho Avato hoya tyAre rophabhera Avato hoya. eTale ApaNe jANIe ke A kaMI pheraphAra thayo che kaMIka, Ane 'iphekTa' che kaMI. eTale ene ApaNe kahIe ke, "Avo Avo, jarA cA pIne jAva." ApaNe peluM tapAsa karavA mATe cA pAIe chIe, emanA ropha sAru nathI pAtA. tyAre e jANe ke enAM rophane lIdhe cA pAya che. ApaNe cA-pANI pAIne pachI pUchIe ke, 'kaI bAju gayA hatA ?" tyAre e kahe, 'pelA pAMca hajAra rUpiyA levAnA hatA ne, te lAvyo."

Page #173
AptavANI-9 garva cAlIsa ratala thAya. 295 praznakartA : kaI rIte e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : evuM che, loka to abhimAnane samajatuM nathI, garvamAM samajatuM nathI. garva eTale abhimAna nahIM. abhimAna zabda judo, garva judo, ahaMkAreya judo. praznakartA : to garva eTale huMpada ? dAdAzrI : nA. huMpada eTale ahaMkAra kahevAya. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e ahaMkAra kahevAya. vakhate tamArAmAM abhimAna nA paNa hoya, garva paNa nA hoya. jyAM pote nathI tyAM huM mAnavuM, enuM nAma huMpada. je svapada cUkyA e huMpadamAM hoya. paNa garva eTale zuM ? garvasa to bahu cIkaNo e hoya. A abhimAna to bhoLo rasa bicAro, pA ratala ! ne garva2sa to cAlIsa ratala !! praznakartA : A jarA garvarasano dAkhalo ApI samajAvo. dAdAzrI : abhimAnamAM evuM nA jANe ke 'A badhAno kartA huM chuM' ane garvarasa to 'huM kartA chuM' evuM mAne. eTale ekano kartA eTale AkhA brahmAMDano kartA ya paNa huM chuM evuM mAne. eTale garvarasa to badho bahu sudhI pahoMce che. garva karatA haze koI ? are, badhI bAbatamAM garva che. 'huM karuM chuM' e bhAna, e badhuM garva kahevAya. kRpALudevane 'huM karuM chuM' e bhAna gayuM tyAre sAcuM samakita thayuM, tyAre emaNe zuM kahyuM ke 'maTyo udayakarmano garva re !' AkhuM jagata udayakarmanA garvavALuM. emAM ekuMya apavAda nahIM. kAraNa ke, jyAM sudhI pote 'svarUpa' thAya nahIM tyAM sudhI bIjI jagyAe che ne bIjI jagyAe che eTale garva rahyA vagara hoya nahIM. 'igoIjhama'zAthI peThuM che ? ajJAnatAne laIne. zenI ajJAnatA ? A badhuM koNa kare che te ajJAnatA che. tethI, narasiMha mahetA zuM kahe che ? "huM karuM, huM karuM e ja ajJAnatA, zakaTano bhAra jyama zvAna 296 AptavANI-9 tANe, sRSTi maMDANa che sarva eNI pere, jogI jogezvarA ko'ka jANe.'' zuM khoTuM kahe che A narasiMha mahetA ? tyAre keTalAka kahe che ke, 'meM A karyuM, meM svAdhyAya karyo, meM tapa karyuM, meM japa karyAM' te kayuM sAcuM ? eTale 'huM karuM, huM karuM' e ajJAnatA, zI rIte pAme mANasa ? ane garva eTale zuM ? ke pote karato nathI tyAM 'meM karyuM' ema kahe, enuM nAma garva. pote karato nathI, 'ITa hepansa' che. tene badale zuM kahe che loko ? praznakartA : meM karyuM. dAdAzrI : enuM nAma garva. praznakartA : ema kahevAya che ke jJAnano paNa garva AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : jJAnano garva to vaLI ApaNe calAvI laIe ke sArI vAtano garva che. paNa A to ajJAnano ya garva che. praznakartA : ne garva sArA arthamAM paNa vaparAya che ne, ke A garva levA jevI vAta che. dAdAzrI : e pachI sArA arthamAM vaparAya che. paNa mULa garva jagatamAM A ahIM che. e pachI ene laI gayelA sArA artha mATe. garva eTale 'jyAM pote nathI karato' tyAM AgaLa 'kare che' evuM mAnavuM. te vakhate rasa utpanna thAya che mahIM, garvarasa utpanna thAya che. te bahu mIThuM lAge che, eTale ene majA Ave che ke meM karyuM ! praznakartA : ane vAtAvaraNa paNa evuM che ke nimittane coMTI paDe, hAratorA kare, mAnapatro Ape ke 'tame ja karyuM.' dAdAzrI : hA, 'tame ja karyuM, tame ja karyuM' ema karIne coMTI paDe. koInuM sAruM karyuM ne, eno garva le. pAchuM kharAba karyuM, teno ya garva le. eTale ke bhalabhalAne mArI nAkhelA, eno garva le. bhalabhalAne meM zrImaMta banAvI dIdhelA, paisAvALA banAvI dIdhA, evo garva le. e svamAna nA kahevAya, abhimAna nA kahevAya.

Page #174
AptavANI-9 297 koI jagyAe pAna nA maLe ne pAna koI laI AvyuM hoya to be-traNa vakhata gAI bole, 'koI jagyAe nahotuM maLatuM, huM !' e garvarasa. 'huM hato te laI Avyo, nahIM to A ThekANuM nA paData' kaheze. e garvarasa cAkhe. bahu majhA Ave. praznakartA : garva levo, e to khoTuM ja kahevAya ne ! dAdAzrI : garvathI saMsAra Ubho rahyo che. saMsAranuM bIja ja garva che, ahaMkAra nathI. praznakartA : garva e bIja che, e kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAramAM svAda hoto nathI. eTale ahaMkAra besvAda che ane A garvarasa svAdiSTa che, bahu ja svAdiSTa ! mAna-abhimAna e svAdiSTa kharuM, paNa garva jeTaluM nahIM. garva jevuM to koI svAdiSTa vastu ja nathI. 'vijJAta' ja choDAve garvarasa ! eTale kartA kharekhara nathI ApaNe. kartA bIjI ja vastu che. A ApaNe Aropa karIe chIe, Aropita bhAva karIe chIe ke 'huM karuM chuM A.' eno garvarasa cAkhavAno maLe. evo garvarasa to bahu mITho lAge pAcho ane tethI karma baMdhAya. garvarasa cAkhyo, Aropita bhAva karyo ke karma baMdhAyuM. have jema che ema jANIe ke bhaI, A kartA ApaNe nathI ne A to 'vyavasthita' kare che tyArathI ApaNe chUTA thaIe. evuM vijJAna hovuM joIe ApaNI pAse. pachI rAga-dveSa ja nA thAya ne ! ApaNe have chIe ja nahIM 'A', evuM vijJAnathI jaNAya. A huM je boluM chuM, te A mAruM vijJAna nathI. A vItarAga vijJAna che ! covIsa tIrthaMkaronuM vijJAna che ! ane vItarAga vijJAna sivAya zI rIte vAtane pAme mANasa ?! praznakartA : ApanI 'thIyarI' pramANe to 'vyavasthita' calAve che, to ya garvarasa thayA ja kare ne, enAmAM ? dAdAzrI : nA. garva thAya ja nahIM ne ! garva to, jyAM sudhI 'huM 298 AptavANI-9 caMdubhAI chuM' evuM 'DisAIDa' thAya tyAM sudhI ja garva che. 'roMga bilIpha' che tyAM sudhI garva che ane 'roMga bilIpha' gaI eTale garva raheto ja nathI. praznakartA : 'roMga bilIpha' to jatI nathI ne, jaladI ? dAdAzrI : 'roMga bilIpha' jatI ja rahe ne ! ame e kADhI ApIe chIe. badhAM keTalAMya jaNanI 'roMga bilIpha' jatI rahI che ne ! ane te 'roMga bilIpha' eka nathI. huM Ano bhaI thauM, Ano mAmo thauM, Ano kAko thauM, evI keTalI badhI 'roMga bilIpho' beThI che ?! praznakartA : jyAM sudhI svarUpanuM bhAna nA karAvo, tyAM sudhI e 'roMga bilIpha' jAya nahIM ne ? dAdAzrI : nA jAya. e bhAna AvavuM joIe. 'huM caMdubhAI nathI, caMdubhAI to khAlI DrAmeTika che' evuM bhAna AvavuM joIe. pachI aMdara saMyama vartyA kare. ane aMdarano, AMtarika saMyama varSo eTale pachI garvarasa nA cAkhe. saMyamanuM sukha eTaluM badhuM upaje ke ene garvarasa cAkhavAnI jarUra ja nA paDe. A to ene sukha nathI, tethI e garvarasa cAkhe che. koI paNa jAtanuM sukha nA hoya tyAre AvuM A sukha to kharuM ja ne ! 'jJAtI'te garva nathI ! e garvarasa cAkhavAthI ja kepha caDhyA kare. pachI bahu kephI thaI jAya. te kepha zI rIte Utare have ? mohano kepha je caDhelo, te zI rIte Utare ?! khoTa Ave che te ya pharajiyAta che ane napho Ave che te ya pharajiyAta che. paNa napho Ave tyAre kahe che, 'huM kamAyo.' ane khoTa gaI tyAre kaheze, 'bhagavAne ghAlI.' 'mAya sTArsa Ara noTa phevarebala.' eTale garvarasa cAkhavo che. e rasa eka jAtano evo mITho che, e garvarasa cAkhavo che ane garvarasane laIne A saMsAra Ubho rahyo che. dArUne lIdhe, bIDIone lIdhe ke cAne lIdhe A saMsAra Ubho nathI rahyo, paNa A garvarasane laIne Ubho rahyo che. A rasa ekalo ja evo che ke koIne choDavAno gamato nathI.

Page #175
300 AptavANI-9 hindustAnamAM kayo mANasa samajI zake Ane ! e to ame phoDa pADIe tyAre samajAya. udayakarma eTale A udaya kare che ane huM nathI karato A sAmAyika. to ene garva nathI. paNa A loka to garvarasa cAkhyA vagara rahe nahIM ne ! cAkhe ke nA cAkhe ? meM cAra sAmAyika karI." te kema cAra kaho cho ? tyAre e kahe che, 'Ane eka ja thaI che.' huM samajI gayo, mokSanI taiyArI karI(!) te A ! AptavANI-9 299 garva eTale zuM ? tamane samajAvuM. koI ApaNane kaheze, "meM cAra sAmAyika karI.' te ghaDIe enA moDhA para Ama khuba AnaMda dekhAto hoya. ane ApaNe pUchIe, 'ANe keTalI sAmAyika karI ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'enAthI thatI nathI. eka ja karI che eNe." pachI ApaNe pUchIe, 'sAheba, cAra sAmAyika tame karyo !" tyAre e kahe, "bIjuM koNa karanAra ? huM ja karanAro ne !' tyAre ApaNe samajIe ne, ke Ane keTalo kepha che ?! manamAM potAnI jAtane zuM ye mAnI beTho hoya. paNa bIje dahADe ApaNe kahIe, 'kema, Aja keTalI sAmAyika karI ?" tyAre e kaheze, 'Aja to paga du:khe che, nathI karI.' nahIM to kaheze, "mAruM mAthuM du:khe che.' to kAle sAmAyika page karI hatI ke tame karI hatI ? koNe karI hatI ? jo tame karI hoya to paganuM bahAnuM nA kADhazo. A to paga pAMsarA che, mAthuM pAMsaruM che, peTamAM duHkhatuM nathI tethI sAmAyika thayuM. badhuM regyulara hoya, badhAM saMjogo pAMsarA hoya tyAre thAya che. temAM tame ekalA zuM karavA mAthe lo cho ?! eTale A parasattAe karyuM. emAM tamAruM zuM ? evuM mAthe le ke nA le ? paNa A to 'igoIjhama' karyA kare che khAlI kare che A badhuM 'sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa." paNa 'pote kahe che, "huM karuM chuM te garvarasa ! ane garvarasa cAkhavAnI Teva che ne, tyAM sudhI A saMsAra Ubho rahe che. vAta to samajavI paDaze ne ? ema ne ema kaMI gaDuM cAle kaMI ? praznakartA : paNa A to badhuM janmathI ja laI AvelA hoya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, janmathI ja laI AvelA che. paNa e bhAna nathI rahetuM ne ! ane garvarasa cAkhyA ja kare che. garvarasa cAkhavAno 'ene" bahu game che. "meM cAra sAmAyika karyA" kahetAnI sAthe Ama 'TAITa' thaI jAya. ane eka sAmAyika karI hoya tenI para jarA dayA khAya. kaheze, AnAthI bicArAthI thatuM nathI. pahelI dayA Ave ne pachI tiraskAra Ave. eTale gavarasathI UbhuM rahyuM che, te ApaNI ja bhUla che ne ?! temAM bhagavAna zuM kare ?! tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM, 'dasa varSe re dhArA ullasI, maTyo udayakarmano garva re !" A udayakarmano garva e zuM, evuM samaje ekuMya mANasa ?! garva levAthI zuM thayuM ? ke gaLAM pakaDAyAM. mokSanuM to kyAM gayuM, paNa mokSamAM to lAkha avatAra te aMtarAya pADyA. sAmAyikano garva karyo ! saMsArano garva thAya. kaheze, "ame phalANI jagyAe gayA.' ohoho, tyAM javAno ya garva lIdho ?! ane jANe kazuM kamAI gayA nA hoya ! jANe ciMtA-TADha UDI gaI nA hoya ! e garva kahevAya. have tethI A lokoe kahyuM che ke "yahI galemeM phAMsI." A sAmAyika karI, pratikramaNa karyuM, A meM tyAguM, e bolyA e tamArA gaLAmAM phAMsI che te garvarasa cAkhyA ! have sat puruSane garva nathI, eTale zuM? e emanA hAthe game eTalI zAMti Ape to ya emane ema garva nathI ke "ApuM , huM A zAMti ApuM chuM" evuM nathI. e ema jANe ke huM to nimitta chuM ane enA gharanI zAMti ene ughADI ApuM chuM. eTale garva nA hoya koI cIjano. kAraNa ke ahaMkAra ja nA hoya to garva hoya kyAMthI ? jyAM ahaMkAra hoya, tyAM garva hoya ja. eTale emane garva nathI. have e garva amArI pAse nA hoya. koI kriyA meM karI che evuM amArAmAM nA hoya. have AnA kartAno rasa cAkhe che tethI jIvAya che A lokothI. atyAre ya zAstronA moTA moTA vAMcanArA hoya, paNa 'meM karyuM enA AdhAre jIve che, enI mastImAM ! A garvarasa AgaLa ene kazuM gamatuM nathI. garvarasa bahu game che

Page #176
AptavANI-9 301 ene. kaheze, 'meM tyAga karyo. strIno tyAga karyo, karoDo rUpiyA choDIne Avyo chuM, te mokSane mATe ja Avyo hoIza ne !' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'zene mATe e to tame jANo. tamane haju kayo rasa cAkhavAno game che, e zuM khabara paDe ?! A rUpiyAno rasa nA gamyo, paNa bIjA to jAtajAtanA rasa hoya che ne jAtajAtanI kIrtio hoya che.' jyAM sudhI garvarasa cAkhe che, tyAM sudhI mokSanI vAto koIe karavI nahIM. dArUDiyAne to ApaNe pANI chAMTIe ne, to kepha Utare ke nA Utare, pAMca-sAta Dolo pANI reDIe to ? pachI zuM kahe bicAro ke, 'sAheba, mArA jevo mUrakha koI che nahIM, huM kazuM samajato nathI. huM mUrakha chuM. ane sAheba, mane mAravo hoya to mAro, paNa mane kaMIka Apo !' to huM pahelo ene mokSa ApuM. kAraNa ke mokSa ApavAne e lAyaka thayo kahevAya. ATalI ja lAyakAta mokSa levAne mATe joIe ! ttth garvarasa caDhAve kepha ane zAstrajJAna to ghaNA avatArathI vAMca vAMca karyA, paNa kazuM dahADo nA vaLyo. tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ne, zAstrajJAnathI niveDo nathI, anubhavajJAnathI nIveDo che. mATe jJAnI pAse jA. zuM kAma pustakamAM mAthAM phoDa phoDa kare che ne AMkho bagADe che ?! te amatho vagara kAmano gA gA kare che ! pachI manamAM kepha vadhyA kare, 'huM jANuM chuM' eno kepha vadhe. e to moTo kepha, pelA dArUDiyAne to eka Dola pANI reDIe ne, to tarata UtarI jAya. paNa Amane kepha Utare nahIM. uparathI bhagavAna Ave to ya kepha nA Utare. bhagavAnamAM ye kalpanA kare ! kAraNa ke, 'huM jANuM chuM'no kepha caDhyo che ne ! A lokono kyAre pAra Ave ?! ane enI pAchaLa joDe joDe pAchI mAnanI bhAvanA ! garvarasa to cAkhavAnI Teva che ja ne, ke garvarasa cAkhavAno choDI detAM haze ?! garvarasa choDe nahIM ne ! e to bahu mITho hoya. 'meM Ama karyuM ne tema karyuM' bolIne garvarasa caDhyA ja kare. potAnuM kareluM koIne kahI batAve, te ghaDIe ene kevo AnaMda thAya che ? bahu AnaMda thAya che, nahIM ? 302 AptavANI-9 aham rAkhavo 'jANato nathI'to ! koI paNa vastuno dharma kyAre prApta thAya ? ke mahAna puruSonAM vacanonuM ArAdhana karavAmAM Ave ane temAM 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI' evA bhAvathI karavAmAM Ave to puNya baMdhAya che. 'huM jANuM chuM' e bhAvathI kare to pApa ja baMdhAya. praznakartA : paNa 'huM jANuM chuM' e bhAvathI ja thatuM hatuM. dAdAzrI : nahIM to paNa, mAruM kahevAnuM ke A badhuM viruddha kahevAya. A to loko mAne che ke ame puNya karIe chIe. eTaluM sAruM che, ramI ramavA jAya tenAM karatAM sAruM che A ! praznakartA : paNa pApa kevI rIte thAya ? pApa to thAya ja nahIM ne ? eno Azaya ja nathI. koIne duHkha paNa thatuM nathI. dAdAzrI : duHkha karavAnuM nathI. garvarasa cAkhavo che AmAM. moTAmAM moTo garvarasa cAkhe che. 'huM jANuM chuM, huM samajuM chuM !' ane pachI je je karavAmAM Ave e badhI vAtamAM mAla nahIM. kahevA jevuM nathI. bahu ughADuM nA karavuM. huM thoDuM ughADuM karuM, te khoTuM dekhAya pachI. moDhA para 'huM jANuM chuM' e bhAva hoya tyAM koI dahADo ya phreza nA dekhAya. praznakartA : paNa aham sivAya prApti zI rIte thAya ? dAdAzrI : aham to kevo rAkhavAno che ? 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI' evo aham rAkhavAno che. 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI' evo aham rAkhI ane je kArya karavAmAM Ave to e aham phaLa Ape. nahIM to phaLa ja nA Ape ne ! nahIM to 'poIjhana' caDhyA kare, jhera caDhyA ja kare. varlDamAM koI AkhA cAra vedanA jJAtA hoya, te ahIM AgaLa Ave, tyAre e mane kahe ke, 'huM jANuM chuM.' tyAre huM tene eka ja zabdamAM kahuM ke, "kazuM zakorUM ye jANyuM nathI teM ! jANyuM to enuM nAma kahevAya ke kahevuM ja nA paDe.' praznakartA : e tAmasa aham kahevAya. e sAttvika aham nA kahevAya ne ? sAttvika aham hoya to prApti thAya ke nA thAya ?

Page #177
AptavANI-9 303 dAdAzrI : sAttvika aham rahevo muzkela che ne ! enI vyAkhyA karavI bahu muzkela che. sAtvika aham kevo hoya ke 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI." praznakartA : je sahajabhAve ja thAya. dAdAzrI : nA. evo aham ja ke, "huM kaMI ja jANato nathI.' eTale A badhA loko phAMphA mAre che, AkhI duniyA phAMphA mArI rahI che. eka akSara jaDe evI vastu nathI. A satya jaDe evuM nathI. je satya A lokone jaDyuM che e vinAzI satya che. AtmA jANyA sivAya kazuM vaLe nahIM, bhaTaka bhaTaka karyA ja karo. kAraNa ke pustakamAM AtmA hoya nahIM. kyAMthI jANI lAve ? "jJAnI' pAsethI ja AtmA prApta thaze. paNa 'jJAnI' hoya ja nahIM ne ! koIka ja phero hoya. tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ke, durlabha, durlabha, durlabha, durlabha che !! jJAnI hoya ja nahIM ! kyAMthI lAve ? garva, svaprazaMsA vakhate... "jAgRti' ! praznakartA : svaprazaMsA ne garvarasa e kone kahevAya ? ane e cAkhavAnI TevanuM kAraNa zuM? ene TALavAno upAya zuM? dAdAzrI : svaprazaMsA eTale koIka kahe ke, "tuM bahu DAhyo che, ne tuM bahu lAyaka mANasa che, ne tArA jevA mANasa kyAMthI maLe !' e svaprazaMsA ! evuM kahe eTale pachI bIjuM badhuM visAre paDI jAya. tamAre Akho divasa kAma karAvavuM hoya to e kare ya kharo. ane garvarasa eTale "meM kevuM sarasa karyuM, kevuM Ama karyuM.' je kAma karyuM hoya ne, te 'kevuM sarasa che" ema rasa eno cAkhe, e garvarasa ! e garvarasa cAkhavAnI TevanuM kAraNa zuM ? basa, enI pAchaLa ahaMkAra che, "IgoIjhama' che ke huM kaMIka chuM. ene TALavAno upAya zuM ? te to badhuM tamane A "jJAna" pachI 304 AptavANI-9 TALI nAkhyuM che. have je "DiscArja rUpe rahyuM che te ja rahyuM ne ! 'enAthI" ApaNe" cheTA rahevuM. praznakartA : dAdA, e "DiscArjamAM ya Ama jAgRta kevI rIte rahevuM ? dAdAzrI : A 'caMdubhAI" je kare, e "ApaNe" joyA karavAnuM. 'caMdubhAI garvarasa cAkhe che te ya joyA karavAnuM ane svaprazaMsA sAMbhaLavAmAM khuza thAya che te ya joyA karavAnuM. praznakartA ane pote eka sAruM kArya karyuM hoya to pote bIjAne kahe ya kharo, daza jaNane kahI Ave ke, "meM AvuM karyuM, AvuM karyuM." evuM ye kahevAI jAya, to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : hA, paNa kahe to ja ene garvarasa thAya ne ! garvarasa enuM nAma kahevAya ke bIjAne kahe eTale garvarasa utpanna thAya, tyAre ene majA Ave. ane koI UMghI gayo hoya ne, to thoDIvAra pachI ene UThADIne paNa kahe, tyAre ja choDe ! praznakartA : paNa evuM thAya eTale e to puSTi maLyA kare ne, pAchI ? dAdAzrI : e to puSTi maLe ne ! te ya zuM vadhe ? kaMI AtmA ocho vadhavAno che ? A to ahaMkAra vadhe. praznakartA : ahaMkArane puSTi maLatI jAya, ema pelI AtmA bAju khoTa jAya ne, eTalI ? dAdAzrI : e to jAya ne ! praznakartA : have A 'DiscArja svarUpe jyAre hoya, ene satata joyA kare. to e jovAnuM kaI rIte thAya ? dAdAzrI : A 'philma" utArI hoya ne, ene ApaNe joyA karIe ne, emAM zuM vaparAya ? A sthaLa AMkha vaparAya ane aMdaranI AMkha

Page #178
AptavANI-9 305 vaparAya che, banne vaparAya che. jarUra hoya to A uparano bhAga, dhULa vastune mATe A AMkha vaparAya. ane sUkSmane mATe to aMdaranI AMkhathI samajAya. te joyA karavAnuM ke A zuM karI rahyuM che, eTaluM ja ! zuM karI rahyuM che eTaluM ja jANavAnuM. AmAM vadhu garvarasa cAkhe che e badhuMya ApaNe joyA karavuM. ane pachI jarA kahevuM ke kharuM, 'caMdubhAI, zuM karavA haju AvuM A cAkho cho ?! jarA pAMsarA cAlo ne !" ema kahevuM, basa. praznakartA : te ghaNIvAra huM kahuM chuM ke, "besane, chAno mAno akkalano kothaLo !" dAdAzrI : hA. akkalano kothaLo kahIe eTale rAge paDe. vece to cAra AnAya nA Ave, ema kahI devuM. pahelAM kahetA hatAM ke akkalanA bAradAna AvyA che ! have e garvarasa mITho Avato haze ke kaDavo haze ? praznakartA : mIThAza lAge. paNa e garvarasa nA levAya, enA mATe zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : karavAnuM kazuM nahIM. ApaNuM jJAna jANavAnuM. garvarasane cAkhanArA 'ApaNe' hoya ! "ApaNe" koNa chIe, enuM lakSa rAkhavuM paDe. emAM kazuM karavAnuM hotuM nathI ne ! ApaNuM "jJAna" ja evuM che ke garvarasa cakhAya nahIM ane cakhAya to tarata pratikramaNa kare. vakhate kaMIka coMTyuM. pahelAMnA abhyAsathI vRttio e bAju vaLI gaI hoya, to tarata UkhADI nAkhe. eTale garvarasa ApaNA "jJAna" lIdhelA 'mahAtmA' cAkhe nahIM. bIjA badhA loko garvarasa cAkhe. kAraNa ke rasto jaDyo nathI ne ! jJAtI', gAravatAmAM nathI ! praznakartA : pachI gAravatA. A gAravatA zabdano jarA vizeSa phoDA pADo ne ! 306 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : zene gAravatA kaho cho tame ? gAravAno artha zo ? A gAravatA e judI vastu che. gAravatA to gAyane ya hoya, bheMsane ya hoya ane mANasane ya hoya. gAravatA dareka manuSyane hoya ane AmAM ApaNA mahAtmAone ya hoya. haju to loka narI gAravAmAM paDyA che. - have gAravatA eTale zuM? gAravatA pratyakSa jovI hoya to - A mila hoya che ne, tyAM AgaLa pelAM khAbaDAM hoya che, taLAva jevuM, naryuM gaMdhAtuM hoya e. milanuM pANI javAthI e khADA pANIthI bharAI rahe che. paNa pANI milanuM che eTale kSAravALuM che ne, eTale e kSAranA pANIthI khADAnAM aMdaranI mATI khavAI jAya che, eTale mahIM kAdava thaI jAya che. aMdaranI mATI saDI jAya, kahovAI jAya. e kohavAro thaI jAya. eTale upara pANI ATaluM ja thoDuM hoya, paNa mahIM ATalo badho naryo kAdava hoya, babbe phUTanI ! ane kALuM aMdhArA jevuM pANI hoya ! have A bheMso che ne, te unALAmAM sakhata tApamAM ThaMDakano rasto khoLe che, phrija khoLe ! te jhADa khoLe, bIjuM khoLe. A gAya karatAM bheMsa bahu garama che, eTale ene tApa sahana nA thAya. gAyo-bakarIo badhAM sahana kare. paNa bheMsathI sahana nA thAya, eTale phrija khoLe. eTale unALAne dahADe bheMsa zodhakhoLa kare ke "koI jagyAe ThaMDaka che ?" ApaNA loka nathI khoLatA ? bahu tApa lAge tyAre kaheze, "heMDo, kaMIka erakaMDizanDa rUmamAM pesIe." te Ama bheMsane paNa khabara paDe. eTale pANI dekhe ne, tyAM pese. ane pese ne jo kAdava dekhe, to basa tyAM e enuM sthAna karI nAkhe. eTale bheMsa mahIM kAdavamAM jaIne bese. khAbaDAmAM pANI hoya, unALAno dahADo hoya eTale pANIno upara uparano bhAga garama thaI jAya. paNa je kAdava che aMdara te ThaMDakavALo hoya. enI mahIM bheMsa paDatuM nAkhe, mahIM bese nirAMte, ATale sudhI kAdava hato, paNa mahIM bese eTale kAdava UMco Ave. UMco Ave eTale Akho koTa paherI lIdho hoya ne, evo cogaradama kAdava phelAI jAya. ane AkhuM zarIra phrijhamAM mUkyA jevuM lAge. evI ThaMDaka lAge jANe phrijhamAM beThI hoya ne, evuM lAge ene. kAdava badho AkhA zarIre ahIM gaLA sudhI pharI vaLyo hoya, A DokuM ekaluM ja bahAra rAkhe. ane Ama joyA kare bahAra badhe. mahIM bese eTale

Page #179
AptavANI-9 307 pelo kAdava hato ne, e kAdavanuM kavara e phrijha ! kAraNa ke kAdavanI bahu ThaMDaka hoya, eTale e ekadama hIma jevuM lAge. baraphanI aMdara pote beThI hoya evI rIte ene lAgyA kare. bheMsa A erakaMDizanamAM bese ane A loko manuSyanA erakaMDizanamAM bese. samaja paDIne ? te erakaMDizanamAM beThI hoya evuM ene lAgyA kare. bolo have, phrijhamAM beThelI bheMsa, game eTaluM sonuM ApIe to ye nIkaLe nahIM. have dhaNI haMmezAM traNa vAge dohatA hatA, dUdha kADhatA hatA. te dahADe to dhaNI khoLato khoLato jaDI nahIM eTale ahIM AgaLa Avyo. pachI khAbaDAmAM joI eTale dhaNIe jANyuM ke A to have nIkaLaze zI rIte ? pachI dhaNI pelA ghAsanA lIlA pULA lAvIne bUma pADe. kinAre rahIne pelo kaheze, 'le, le !" bheMsa Ama kAna mAMDe ne Ama jue kharI, pachI moDhuM pheravI nAkhe. paNa UThe nahIM. roja lIlA ghAsa mATe doDadhAma karatI hoya, paNa A gAMThatI nathI atyAre ? to mahIM tane zo svAda paDI gayo che ? phrijhanI ThaMDaka ! ane ahIMthI UThavAnuM nAmeya nahIM. phrijhamAM beThelI te UThe ? A tApamAM, erakaMDizanamAMthI nIkaLatI haze ? gAravatA kahevAya che. pachI dhaNI jANe ke A lIlo pULo nAkhuM chuM to ye lobhAtI nathI, mATe bIjuM kaMIka vadhAre sukha ApIe to pelI UThe. dhaNI samajI gayo ke ene atyAre mastI che, kaMI bIjI lAlaca vagara nIkaLaze nahIM. eTale pachI kapAsiyA laI Ave ane mahIM goLa dekhADe. koIka koIka dahADo khavaDAvato hoya ne, te dekhADe. te pelI bheMseya samajI jAya ke , peluM che. paNa to ya AnAM jevuM to nahIM ja ne ! ghaNuM dekhADIe, sarasa dekhADIe ke dekhatAM ja bhAva thaI jAya, e bheMsa samajI ye jAya ke goLa che. paNa gAravatAmAMthI UThe tyAre ne ? eTale gAMThI nahIM ene ya. kazAyamAM dhyAna Ape nahIM. kAraNa ke tyAM je sukha paDe che evuM bIjAmAM nathI. eTale kAdavamAMthI UThe nahIM. Ama joI le, paNa kazuM hale kare nahIM. AmAM dAda nA de, jarAya dAda nA de. kaheze, AvuM sukha choDIne koNa jAya te ?! e ja gAravatA ! gAravatAnuM sukha A kahevAya. evuM jagata A gAravatAmAM sukha mAnI beThuM che, te gAravatAmAMthI khasatA ja nathI ne ! A strI-puruSo 308 AptavANI-9 UThatAM ja nathI ne ! rAma tArI mAyA ! gAravatAmAM paDelAM che. zI rIte A gAravatAmAMthI UThe? Ane ja phrija mAnyuM. tamane samaja paDIne, gAravatA kone kahevAya e ? jyAre 'jJAnI puruSa' samajaNa pADe tyAre gAravatA samajAya. eTale A "ekajhekTa' artha samajajo haM, kRpALudeva zuM kahevA mAge che te. je ThaMDaka maLI gaI e ThaMDaka joDe sarakhAmaNI karI che. A loko saMsAramAM gAravatAmAM je besI rahyA che, te ghaNIya satpaSo ne jJAnI kahe kahe kare che, paNa kAna halAvIne pAchA phrijhanI mahIM besI jAya che ! evI gAravatAmAM sat puruSa nA hoya. koI jagyAe krijhanI peThe e besI nA rahe. tame phrijhamAM besADo to ya e bahAra nIkaLe ane tApamAM besADI to ya bahAra nIkaLe. emane evI gAravatA nA hoya. ane jagatanAM lokone to e saMsAramAM je peThAM ne, je gAravatA lAge che ne, te vyAkhyAna sAMbhaLavAye jatAM nathI ne Akho dahADo gAravatAmAM ne gAravatAmAM. e ThaMDakamAM ne ThaMDakamAM, e gAravatA kahevAya. saMsArI loko A gAravatAmAM paDI rahyA che ane bheMsa pelI gAravAmAM paDI rahI che. pAMca indriyanAM sukha, e ja lokonI gAravatA ! jo mastImAM !! eTale AkhuM jagata gAravatAmAM ja sapaDAyuM che. e bheMsane khabara nathI ke A sUryanArAyaNa AthamyA vagara rahevAnA nathI. ane rAte pachI be vAge ya ghera to javuM paDaze. to enA karatAM pAMsarI thaIne UThane ! A khAvAnuM dhare che to UTha ne, to tArI AbarU rahe ane dhaNInI ye AbarU rahe. paNa to ya nA UThe. rAte dasa vAge javuM ja paDe ne, pachI ? pachI pAchuM e ThaMDuM lAge, eTale pAchI TADha vAya. eTale khAbaDAmAMthI bahAra nIkaLI jAya. paNa jyAM sudhI mahIMthI khase nahIM tyAM sudhI, e TAImane gAravatApada kahyuM. atyAre unALAnA tApamAM jarAka akaLAmaNa thAya ne be-traNa DIsa AIsakrIma khAdho, e gAravatA. jo gAravatA ! bheMsonI gAravatA pelI kAdavanI ane manuSyonI gAravatA A. bheMsone to amuka jagyAe gAravatA hoya. paNa manuSyone to strInI gAravatA, erakaMDizanDanI gAravatA ! ane chokarAno bApa, te manamAM malakAyA kare ke, 'traNa chokarA che, te traNa vahu Avaze. traNa chokarA mATe traNa ghara bAMdhavAM che.' A badhI gAravatA UbhI thAya. gaMdhAtA

Page #180
AptavANI-9 309 khAbaDAmAM bheMsa beThelI hoya, evuM AkhuM jagata gAravatAmAM ja paDI rahyuM che. gaMdhamAM, narI viSayonI gaMdhamAM ! viSayanI gaMdhanA sAru kakaLATa bhogave che. eTale A jagatanAM loko rUpa gAravatA, viSaya gAravatA, rasa gAravatA, mohanI-lobhanI gAravatAmAM ja rAce che ane tethI temane bahAra nIkaLavuM gamatuM nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, evuM amArA mATe kahevAya ke lakSmI, pratiSThA, mAna-nAna, e je maLyuM temAM bheMsa jevAM thaIne ja beThAM ?! dAdAzrI : hA, bheMsa jevA thaIne beThAM. praznakartA : e gAravatAmAMthI kADhanAra koI joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : e gAravatAmAMthI kADhanAra joIe ne ! evuM koNa lalacAve ? te zuM zuM melIe ke lalacAya vaLI ? kapAsiyA ne goLane nA gAMThI, to have zene gAMThe e ?! pachI bheMsa bahAra nIkaLe ? e rasa gAravatA kahevAya. praznakartA : A gAravatAno svAda lenAra aMtaHkaraNamAM koNa hoya 310 AptavANI-9 mAMDI. ane cittanI azuddhi thaI eTale tema tema kAdavamAM ghUsavA mAMDyo, saMsAranAM kAdavamAM have koNa kADhe ene ?! ane pAchuM gAravatA ! rasa gAravatA, riddhi gAravatA ne siddhi gAravatA !! traNa prakAranI gAravatAmAM phasAyo, pachI koNa kADhe ene ?! A paNa badhI gAravatA.. praznakartA : A rasa gAravatA e jarA samajAvo ne ? dAdAzrI : A kerIono rasa, bIjo rasa, A bAsudI, e badhA. praznakartA : eTale khorAkanA svAda badhA ? dAdAzrI : hA, svAda. te badhuM rasa gAravatA kahevAya. koI mANasane amuka amuka cIjo bahu ja bhAvatI hoya. e vastu te dahADe banAvavAnI hoya ne, to savArathI enuM citta e vastumAM ja hoya. ane bapore eka vAge banI rahe tyAM sudhI enuM citta emAM hoya. jamyA pachI ye ane tyAra pachI meM enuM citta emAM ja hoya, e rasa gAravatA. A bheMsa kAdavamAM paDI rahe che e rasa gAravatA. A manuSyonI pAMca indriyonA rasomAM gAravatA che. pharI AghopAcho thAya nahIM. e rasa gAravatA, indriyonI rasa gAravatA kahevAya. pachI riddhi gAravatA ! 'mAre be milo che ne Ama che ne A pAMca chokarAM che, be choDIo che, baMgalo che." e riddhi gAravatA ! riddhi eTale A paisA saMbaMdhI, A bhautika badhuM e riddhi kahevAya ane pelI siddhi kahevAya. praznakartA siddhimAM zuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : siddhi AdhyAtmika hoya. praznakartA siddhino dAkhalo Apo ne ! dAdAzrI : A bahu ahiMsaka mANasa hoya, tyAM AgaLa bakarI vAgha dAdAzrI : lenAra koNa hoya te ? e ahaMkAra ja, bIjuM koI nahIM. buddhi samaja pADe che ke A gAravatA, majA bahu Avaze. praznakartA : emAM mukhyapaNuM cittavRttinuM paNa hoya che ne ? dAdAzrI : cittavRtti to tyAM ne tyAM ja bhaTake. praznakartA : gAravatAnAM sthAnomAM ? dAdAzrI : hA, tyAM ja pharyA kare. mAkha bhamyA kare evuM. evuM che, A abhiprAyathI mana UbhuM thayeluM che ane manane bahu moTI cIja gaNavAmAM AvI che. have abhiprAya kema Ubho thayo ? vizeSa bhAvathI ahaMkAra Ubho thayo, ne ahaMkArathI abhiprAya Ubho thayo. have abhiprAyathI mana UbhuM thayuM, ane mana UbhuM thavAthI cittanI azuddhi thavA

Page #181
AptavANI-9 badhA bhegA thaI jAya to ya vAMdho nA Ave. athavA koI mAra mAra karato ahIM Avyo hoya to mane dekhe eTale pachI badhuM bhUlI jAya. svabhAva bhUlADe ! 311 siddhi gAravatA A sAdhu, sanyAsIo, AcAryone hoya. emane koI kahe "bApajI, mAre A du:kha che.' te pelA siddhi vaTAve. pachI gAravatAmAM rahe. "bApajI, bApajI' loka kahe eTale khuza. loko ya kaMI mUkI jAya lADavA ne e badhuM, te khAya, pIve ne majA kare. AvI badhI gAravatAmAM rahe. siddhi AvI hoya to siddhinI gAravatAmAM ja rahyA kare, basa. bIjo kaMI 'eDavAnsa' thavAno vicAra nA kare. praznakartA : eTale gAravatA 'eDavAnsa' thavAnuM rokI de ?! dAdAzrI : hA, e gAravatAmAM, loko badhA 'bApajI, bApajI' karyA kare eTale pelA khuza khuza ! eTale keTalIka siddhi gAravatA hoya che, keTalIka ridvi gAravatA hoya che, keTalIka rasa gAravatA hoya. AvI aneka prakAranI gAravatA hoya che. A zAstronIye gAravatA ja che khAlI ! praznakartA : zAstronI paNa gAravatA ? dAdAzrI : basa, jyAM besI rahevAnuM thAya ne khasavAnuM mana nA thAya e badhI gAravatA. bAkI, roje roja pragati karavAnI che. : praznakartA : eTale chellA sTezana sudhI jatAM daramyAna game tevAM AvAM sthaLo Ave tyAM rahevuM nahIM ! dAdAzrI : tyAM AgaLa rokAI javAnuM nahIM, tyAM AgaLa je sukha Ave, te sukhamAM rokAI javAnuM nahIM. e to zAstro vAMce eTale sukha varte. kAraNa ke 'jJAnI puruSa'nI vAta che. tethI aMdara ThaMDaka thAya, zAMti thAya. rAjya maLyuM hoya ane rAjyamAM tanmayAkAra thaIne paDI rahevuM, e badhI ye gAravatA kahevAya. bAkI, gAravatAne loka samajatuM ja nathI, gAravatA zuM che te ? 312 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : A to pelo bheMsano dAkhalo Apyo ne, enAthI Ama spaSTa samajAya. dAdAzrI : te A dAkhalo Apelo ne, eTale loko rastAmAM bheMsane kAdavamAM beThelI dekhe, khAbaDAmAM bheMso dekhAya ke kaheze, 'e ya pelI gAravatA AvI. dAdA, A juo gAravatA.' huM kahuM, 'hA, tane yAda rahyuM kharuM !' gAravatAno artha ja koIe karyo nathI. gAravatAno artha koI jagyAe pustakamAM Apelo nathI. tethI meM A gAravatAno arthavivAda phoDavAra karyo. gAravatAmAMthI chUTavuM kaI rIte ? praznakartA : eTale A sukhanI bhrAMti, e AkhuM gAravatAnuM svarUpa ja che ne ? dAdAzrI : badhuM gAravatA ja che. praznakartA : e gAravatAnA saMjogo je bhegA thAya che atyAre, Ama to e pahelethI hisAba laIne Avelo che ? dAdAzrI : badhuM 'DIsAIDeDa' laI karIne Avelo che. praznakartA : to paNa have, atyAre ene pharIthI vaLagI paDe che ? dAdAzrI : ajJAnI hoya to vaLagI paDe ne 'jJAna' ne 'AjJA' pALato hoya to nA vaLage. praznakartA : to ya emAMthI chUTI nA zake ? ene bhogavavuM to paDe ja ne, eTaluM ? dAdAzrI : sahI karelI ne ! praznakartA : atyAre e gAravatAmAM pAcho svAda le to navI sahI ye paDavAnI ?

Page #182
314 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 313 dAdAzrI : nA. ApaNuM "jJAna" lIdheluM hoya to nA paDe. praznakartA : A gAravatAmAM, atyAra sudhInI lAIphamAM Ama cittavRtti to evI vikharAyelI hoya ja ne ? dAdAzrI : badhI vikherAyelI ja hoya. tethI ekAgra thAya ja nahIM roDamAMthI UThIne tyAM sAMtAkrujha jAya ? nAdArI nIkaLI hoya tyAre jAya. paisA nA hoya, kazuM nA hoya. pachI pelo kADhe to jAya. praznakartA : eTale A loka gAravatAmAMthI chUTI zakatuM ja nathI ? dAdAzrI : gAravatA ! o hoho, paNa gAravatAmAMthI chUTavA mATe loka taiyAra hoya che ? nA, gAravatAmAM to loko khuza thaIne emAM paDI rahe haMmezAM. praznakartA : paNa kharo AnaMda to tyAM nathI ne ? dAdAzrI : nathI, nahIM ? to ya jagata AkhuM gAravatAmAM paDI rahyuM praznakartA : to A gAravatA je che, ene pramAdanI parAkASTA nA kahevAya ? - dAdAzrI : pramAda e judI vastu che, ne A gAravatA e judI vastu che. gAravatA eTale ene UThavAno vicAre ya nA Ave. pramAdInA to manamAM ema thAya, 'baLyuM, huM pramAdI chuM." jyAre pelAne to "huM gAravatAmAM chuM' evuM bhAne ya nA thAya ! gAravatAmAM ja che ne, jagata. atyAra sudhI badhuM gAravatA ja kahevAya. e bheMsa UbhI ja nA thAya. praznakartA sUryanArAyaNa to AthamyA vagara raheze nahIM ane ThaMDI paDaze eTale UThavuM paDaze ene. paNa A manuSyone kaMI evA saMjoga badalAtA nathI, A gAravatAmAMthI nIkaLavA mATe ? dAdAzrI : nA, A game che. sArI sArI cIjo pelo khavaDAve to ya kaheze, 'AnI joDe nahIM." paNa ene bahu ja bhUkha lAge ne, to A sukha ene sukha mAlama paDe ja nahIM. ene vedanA thAya. to e UThe. bahu ja bhUkha lAge to UThe. agara to bahAranuM vAtAvaraNa ThaMDuM paDI gayuM hoya to UThe. hA, eTale aMdara majhA nA Ave. praznakartA : paNa gAravatAmAMthI chUTavAnI koI cAvI haze ne ? dAdAzrI : e to enI meLe bahAra ThaMDuM thAya eTale UThI jAya. praznakartA : paNa A manuSyonI lAIphamAM evuM vAtAvaraNa kaMI Ave ? praznakartA : to pachI A gAravatA vastu che, e mANasanAmAMthI jAya kevI rIte ? dAdAzrI : bIjuM sukha jue to jAya. praznakartA : bIjuM sAruM sukha maLe to chUTI jAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, to chUTe. bIjuM sukha pratItimAM besI jAya ene. nA jovAmAM AvyuM hoya ne pratIti bese ke "A dAdA kahe che ema ja che to e jAya. praznakartA : ApaNA mahAtmAone A gAravatA kharI ne ? dAdAzrI : kharI. paNa gAravatAmAM e samaje ke ApaNane gAravatAnuM vaLagaNa che, chatAM game gAravatA ! praznakartA : e gAravatAmAM nA rahIe ane nIkaLI jaIe evuM zuM 'solyuzana' ? dAdAzrI : e "solyuzana' to, manamAM nakkI karavuM joIe ke A hoya ke te hoya, bene samAna karI nAkhe ne, to 'solyuzana' hoya. samAna ! potAnI kiMmatamAM samAna !! dAdAzrI : nA, nA. A atyAre A badhA gAravatAmAM che. peDara

Page #183
AptavANI-9 315 praznakartA : eTale A gAravatAnAM sukha je maLe che e.... dAdAzrI : enI kiMmata ane AnI kiMmata be sarakhI mAne, benI kiMmata ja sarakhI karI nAkhe. praznakartA : paNa zenI zenI kiMmata ? dAdAzrI : A gAravatAnI ane bIjI vastu Ape ne khAvApIvAnuM maLatuM hoya te. kiMmata sarakhI karI nAkhe eTale UDI jAya e. AmAM ya kyAM sukha che ne AmAM ya kyAM sukha che, evuM badhuM jANe che e ene UDAvI nAkhe. gAravatAne to loka samajatuM ja nathI. praznakartA : paNa "jJAna" lIdheluM hoya, ene gAravatAmAMthI chUTavA mATeno A sivAya bIjo koI rasto kharo ? dAdAzrI : paNa "caMdubhAI"ne asara rahe che ke "zuddhAtmA'ne asara rahe che ? gAravatAnI asara rahetI hoya to 'caMdubhAI' kahevAya. ane gAravatAnI asara nA rahetI hoya to 'zuddhAtmA" thaI gayA. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, ame ahIMyAM AvyA chIe, dAdAnA darzana karavA che, dAdAnI sAthe besavuM che, emAM paNa e je rasa hoya, e paNa gAravatA ja kahevAya ne ? - dAdAzrI : nA. e gAravatA nahIM. ene gAravatA kema kahevAya ?! e to mukhya vastu che. e to amRta jevI vAta che. amane gAravatA eke ya hoya nahIM. rasa gAravatA nA hoya, riddhi gAravatA nA hoya, siddhi gAravatA nA hoya ! koI paNa prakAranI gAravatA nA hoya. jagata AkhuM ya gAravatAmAM ja saDyA kare che. 'jJAnI" gAravatAmAM nA hoya. mukti sAdhavI "jJAtI' Azraye ! bhagavAna to mane vaza thaI gayelA che. bhagavAna jene vaza thaI gayA che evAM 'jJAnI puruSa', emane kayA kayA guNo nA hoya ? garva 316 AptavANI-9 nA hoya, gAravatA nA hoya, aMtaraMga spRhA nA hoya, unmattatA nA hoya. praznakartA : e to bahu UMce jAva tyAre e jAya. dAdAzrI : nA. paNa e jatA rahe pachI ja jJAnI kahevAya. e jatA rahyA pachI ame ema kahIe ke A TeparekarDa bole che. bAkI 'TeparekarDa bole che', evuM A duniyAmAM koI nA bole. potAnI vANI sArI hoya ne, to kevuM sarasa huM bolyo, kevuM sarasa bolyo' kahyA kare. jyAre Ane 'TeparekarDa' ame bolIe chIe. kAraNa ke mAlikI vagaranI vAta che A badhI. eTale garva gAravatA kazuM ja rahyuM nahIM ne ! kazuM hoya ja nahIM. bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM ne ! eka phakta baMdhana keTaluM ? A ekaluM ja, ke A bhAvanA kaMIka pUrvabhave bhAvelI haze ke A je sukha huM pAmyo chuM e loko pAme. eTalA pUratI A kriyA che. e bhAvanAnuM phaLa che A. eTale A alaukika kahevAya. A laukika nA kahevAya. ahIMyAM to amArI vANI, vartana ane vinaya, A traNa cIja manohara hoya, manane haraNa kare tevuM hoya. ane te jyAre tyAre e thavuM joIe, evuM thavuM paDaze. e to je thayA hoya temanI pAchaLa paDIe, to tevuM thaI javAya ke nA thaI javAya ? praznakartA : thaI javAya. dAdAzrI : basa, bIjuM kazuM karavAnI jarUra nathI ApaNe. emanI pAchaLa paDavuM. anaMta avatAranI khoTa eka avatAramAM bhAMgavAnI che. eTale kALajI to rAkhavI paDaze ne ? keTalA avatAranI khoTa che ? anaMta avatAranI khoTa !

Page #184
318 AptavANI-9 [] ladhutama H gurutama ladhutama' 'gurutama' padamAM 'jJAtI' ! amArI e ja bhAvanA che ke bhale eka avatAra moDuM thaze to vAMdho nathI. paNa A 'vijJAna' phelAvuM joIe ane 'vijJAna' lokone lAbha karavuM joIe. tethI khulAso karavA mATe huM Avyo chuM. mane navarAza che. mAre koI kAma nathI. navarAmAM navaro mANasa huM chuM ane tadana buddhi vagarano huM ekalo ja chuM, eTale mane kazI bhAMjagaDa nathI. tamAre to bhAMjagaDa hoya. bAkI, huM kaMI tamArAthI moTo nathI, e tamane lAge evuM ? A to vyavahArane khAtara A UMca pade beThA chIe. ane pAchuM mArI 'hAITa' keTalI che, te tame jANo cho ? laghutama ! laghutama eTale zuM ? A duniyAmAM jeTalA jIva che, emAM sauthI nAnAmAM nAno huM chuM. e mArI 'hAITa' che. pachI A tamane kaMI harakata kare evuM che kazuM? eTale A bhautikamAM, A nAmamAM-rUpamAM-paisA-mAna-tAna e badhI bAbatamAM laghutama. ane A bIjI hAITa eTale selpha karIne gurutama chIe ame. eTale 'homa DipArTamenTamAM ame gustama ane 'phorena DipArTamenTa'mAM laghutama ! tame 'phorenamAM gurutama thavA pharo cho eTale mahIM 'homa DipArTamenTa'mAM laghutama thAva cho. to laghutama eTale keTaluM moTuM kahevAya ? praznakartA : laghutama eTale ekadama nAnAmAM nAno, paNa uttamamAM uttama kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, uttama nahIM. laghutama ! e uttama AmAM nathI. laghu e nAno kahevAya. laghutama eTale vadhAre nAno kahevAya. ane laghutama eTale sarvathI nAno, koI jIva enAthI nAno nahIM. basa ! enuM nAma ja laghutama. praznakartA : vyavahAramAM kahe che ne, dAsAnudAsa chuM, dAsano ye dAsa ne teno ya huM dAsa chuM, e ? dAdAzrI : nA. ApaNe tyAM dAsAnudAsa sudhI pahoMcelA. paNa koI laghutama sudhI nahIM pahoMcelo. jyAre amAruM A laghutama svarUpa che, eTale lokonuM kalyANa karI nAkhaze. vyavahArathI ladhutamamAM chuM ane nizcayathI gurutamamAM chuM. huM koIno guru thayo nathI. AkhA jagatane guru tarIke mAnuM chuM. tame badhA AvyA, tamane guru tarIke mAnuM chuM. tyAre ko'ka kaheze, 'tame ahIM kema beThA ?" have huM ahIM nIce besuM, to A loko besavA nathI detA. A loko mane UThAvIne upara besADe che. bAkI, mane to nIce besavAnuM bahu sAruM paDe che. eTale gurupadamAM chuM nahIM, laghutamamAM chuM. bhAvamAM to ladhutama ja ! eTale huM kaMI tamAro uparI nathI. tame mArA uparI cho. mArI jAtane uparIpaNuM koI dahADo ya meM mAnyuM nathI. eTale tamAre vAMdho kharo ? bhaDaka nahIM, vAMdho nahIM. tamArAthI moTAM hoya to tamane bhaDaka lAve ke, "moTA mANasa, zuM kahI deze !! A to tame mane vaDho, paNa huM tamane nahIM vaDhuM. huM vaTuM to huM bhUlathApa khaI gayo kahevAuM. ane tame vaDho to, tamArI samajaNapherane laIne vaDhI paDo. kacAza eTale vaDhI paDone ? bAkI, AkhuM jagata amAruM uparI che. kAraNa ke huM laghutama chuM. tamAre keTalA uparI che ? kema bolatA nathI ! praznakartA : paNa mAre laghutama manAyuM nathI.

Page #185
AptavANI-9 319 dAdAzrI : kema ? bane evuM nathI ? evuM che ne, gurutama eTale upara caDhavuM. A pAvAgaDha che, to upara caDhavuM hoya to jora paDe ke nIce utaravuM hoya to ? praznakartA : upara caDhavuM hoya to jora paDe. dAdAzrI : to laghutama eTale nIce UtaravuM. e to ramatAM ramatAM nIce utarI javAya. nA UtarI jAya ramatAM ramatAM ? ame to nirAMte ramatAM ramatAM UtarI gayA hatA. mATe bhAva laghutamano ja rAkhavo. jeTaluM laghutamano bhAva rAkhazo eTale gurutamamAM AgaLa vadhazo. ane laghutama thAya to gurutama pada maLe che. tyAre bhagavAna vaza varte ! 320 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : lyo, have AvuM UMcuM pada mUkIne koNa nIcA padamAM jAya ? ane bhagavAna vaza thayelA che enI 'gerenTI' ApuM chuM. emane kahuM chuM ke kharo ke, 'tame ahIMthI khAlI karo ne !" tyAre e kahe, 'kyAM jAuM ? koI jagyA hoya to huM kahIza." meM kahyuM, "koIkane tyAM peso to mane vAMdho nathI. have bahu dahADA rahyA ahIM AgaLa." paNa e jagyA thavI joIe ne ?! e to mamatArahita thavuM paDe, ahaMkArarahita thavuM paDe, tyAre e kamarAmAM bhagavAna Ave. evo kamaro joIe. kamaro sAro nA joIe ? bhagavAna darekane vaza thaI zake che. jenAmAM ahaMkAra ocho hoya to vAMdho nahIM, paNa jenI mamatA gayelI che ane bhagavAna vaza thayA vagara rahe ja nahIM. jenI mamatA saMpUrNa gaI ene bhagavAna vaza thayA vagara rahe nahIM. juniyara'nA ye "juniyara' ! ne AkhI duniyAmAM huM ekalo ja 'juniyara' chuM. 'juniyara'no juniyara' thAya to AkhA brahmAMDano 'siniyara' thAya. huM ekalo ja juniyara' rahyo chuM. mane 'siniyara' karavo che tamAre have ? mane hakka 'siniyara' karavo che ? to "juniyara' thavAya evuM che. praznakartA ame to haju ApanI sarakhAmaNImAM nAnA bALaka jevA chIe. eTale huM A vyavahAramAM laghutama chuM ane nizcayamAM kharI rIte gurutama chuM. mAro uparI koI nathI. bhagavAna paNa mane vaza thaI gayelA che. to pachI have bIjuM rahyuM zuM ? loko mane kahe che, "tame dAdA bhagavAna kahevaDAvo cho ?" meM kahyuM, nA. huM zuM karavA kahevaDAvuM? jayAM bhagavAna pote ja mane vaza thaI gayA che, pachI e kahevaDAvAnI zI jarUra ? bhagavAna, cauda lokano nAtha mane vaza thaI gayelo che ane jo tame mAruM kaheluM sevana sevo to tamane paNa tamAro nAtha vaza thaI jaze.' vaza thayeluM kAmanuM, paNa bhagavAna thaIne zuM kADhavAnuM ? je che ene bhagavAna rahevA do ne ! mane cauda lokano nAtha vaza thayelo che ane tamane vaza thAya evo rasto dekhADuM chuM. ane bhagavAna thavuM e bahu moTuM jokhama kahevAya. eTale bhagavAna jo huM kahuM to mAre mAthe jokhamadArI Ave. tamane to zuM jAya ? ane huM zuM karavA evuM paNuM paNa ? mAre pesIne zuM kAma che ? mAre bhagavAna vaza thayelA che, te zuM khoTA che ? eTale bhagavAna thavuM sAruM ke vaza thayelA sArA ? kayuM pada UMcuM? praznakartA : vaza thayelA che e. dAdAzrI : e judI rIte che. ane huM je kahevA mAguM chuM e judI rIta che. kAraNa ke lokone ema lAge ke A guru che. paNa nA, huM guru nathI. huM laghutama chuM. laghutama eTale 'juniyara'. A badhA ja mArAthI 'siniyara' che. jhADa-pAna, badhAM ja mArAthI 'siniyara', to have tamane 'juniyara' rahevAnuM game ke 'siniyara' rahevAnuM ? praznakartA : ema to "juniyara'nA ye 'juniyara' rahevAnuM game. dAdAzrI : hA, hA. e lAbha che, to pachI 'siniyara'nA 'siniyara thavAya. jene 'juniyara'nA 'juniyara' rahevuM che, te 'siniyara'no

Page #186
AptavANI-9 32 1 'siniyara' thaI zake. laghutama bhaNatAM jaDyA bhagavAta ! nAnapaNamAM gujarAtI skUlamAM eka mAstare mane kahyuM, 'A tame laghutama zIkho." tyAre meM kahyuM, 'laghutama eTale zuM kahevA mAgo cho ? laghutama zI rIte thAya ?" tyAre kahe che, "A badhI rakamo je ApI che. emAM nAnAmAM nAnI rakama, avibhAjya rakama, jene pharI bhAgI nA zakAya evI rakama, e zodhI kADhavAnI che." tyAre huM te vakhatamAM nAnI uMmaramAM, paNa mANasone zuM kaheto hato ? A rakamo sArI nathI. zabda to evo bolato hato. te mane A vAta mAphaka AvI. eTale mane ema lAgyuM ke A 'rakamo'nI aMdara pachI evuM ja che ne ?! eTale bhagavAna badhAmAM avibhAjyarUpe rahelA che. eTale tyArathI ja mAro svabhAva laghutama bhaNI DhaLato gayo. te laghutama thayuM nahIM paNa DhaLyo kharo. paNa chevaTe laghutama thaIne Ubho rahyo. atyAre 'bAya rileTiva vyu poInTa AI ema kamplITa laghutama" ane bAya rIyala vyu poInTa AI ema kamplITa gurutama." eTale A saMsAranI bAbatomAM, jyAM sudhI saMsArI veza che, te bAbatamAM huM laghutama chuM. eTale A laghutamanI 'thiyarI' pahelethI "eDopTa' thaI gayelI. 322 AptavANI-9 eTale ame 'rileTiva'mAM laghutama thaIne beThelA. ame kahIe ke 'bhaI, tArA karatAM ame nAnA chIe, tuM gALa dauM enA karatAM huM nAno chuM." e bahu tyAre gadheDo kahe. to gadheDAthI to ApaNe bahu nAnA chIe. gadheDo to 'hevI loDa' che ne ! ane ApaNAmAM to 'loDa' ja nathI. eTale jo gALo bhAMDavI hoya to huM laghutama chuM. laghutama to AkAza jevuM hoya, AkAza paramANu jevuM hoya. laghutamane mAra nA aDe, gALo nA aDe, ene kazuM aDe nahIM. kahevAno khAsa bhAvArtha eTalo ke tAre kaMI ropha rAkhavo hoya to huM laghutama chuM ne tAre mAro ropha rAkhavo hoya to huM gutama chuM. ladhutA ja laI jAya, gurutA bhaNI ! ApaNane koI nAlAyaka kahe to pachI nAlAyakane jhaghaDo karavAno rahyo ja nahIM ne ? nAlAyaka eTale laghutama rahyA ne ! eTale A jagata to kaMI eka jAtanI vaMzAvali che ? badhI ja pahelethI ja cAlI Ave che ane nAlAyako hotA nathI. paNa e to A lAyako emane nAlAyaka kahe che ane pelA nAlAyako to A lAyakone ja nAlAyaka kahe che. e pAchuM meM jaIne tapAsa karelI. A to sAmasAmI nAlAyaka kahe che. eTale A nyAya pUro nIkaLe evo nathI jaladI. praznakartA : laghutama e ja jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, laghutama e nyAya, basa. laghutama AvyA ke e badhAM pAMsarA. pachI upAdhi ja nahIM ne ! ane je je lAyaka che e to tame laghutama karavA pharo to ya tamane e gurUtama bhaNI laI jAya. lAcAra thavA karatAM..... eTale evo jyAre tyAre laghutamabhAva karavo paDaze ne ? nahIM to chevaTe mANasa tabiyatathI bahu herAna thaI jAya che ne ene bahu du:kha paDe che, tyAre mANasa DaoNkaTara AgaLa lAcArI kare ke nA kare ? praznakartA: kare ja che ne ! mahatva, laghutama padanuM ja ! praznakartA H to dAdA, Apa AmAM laghutamapadane kema bahu mahattva Apo cho ? dAdAzrI : paNa A laghutama te kAyama 'sephasAIDa" ! je laghutama che te to kAyama 'sephasAIDa' che, gurutamavALAne bhaya. 'laghutama' kahyuM eTale pachI amAre paDavAno zo bhaya ? ahIM UMce beThAM hoya, tene paDavAno bhaya. jagatamAM laghutamabhAvamAM koI hoya nahIM ne ! jagata gurutamabhAvamAM hoya. gurutama thayo hoya te paDe. eTale ame to laghu thaIne beThelA. amAre jagata pratyeno bhAva e laghutamabhAva che. eTale amane kazuM paDavAno bho nahIM, kazuM aDe nahIM ne naDe nahIM.

Page #187
AptavANI-9 323 324 AptavANI-9 laghutama puruSa chuM ane A "jJAna" jene jANavuM che tene mATe to huM sauthI moTAmAM moTo chuM, gurutama chuM. eTale jo tAre mokSa joIto hoya to huM gurutama chuM. amArAthI koI moTo nathI. ane tAre saMsAramAM moTA thavuM hoya to laghutama chuM. have mokSe javuM hoya, ene huM gurutama nA kahuM to pAchuM enuM gADuM ja AgaLa nA cAlene ! ane jagatamAM lokone zuM thavuM dAdAzrI : lAcAra thavuM tenAM karatAM laghutama thavuM sAruM. paNa lAcAra nahIM thavuM joIe. koI paNa kAraNe lAcAra nahIM thaI javuM joIe. A badhA je moTA mANaso che ne, e jyAre peTamAM duHkhe ne, tyAre o mA-bApa ! tame kaho e karuM' kahe. te ghaDIe lAcAra thAya. mahIM duHkha thAya che tyAre 'DokTara, mane bacAvajo' kahe. evI lAcArI kare. A loko bahu suMvALA hoya, te duHkha sahana nA thAya. gurutama thavA gayA ne, tenuM pUMDiyuM dahADe dahADe bahu suMvALuM thaI jAya. ane laghutama thavA mATe to kaThaNa paMThiyuM joIe. kaheze, 'tAre je karavuM hoya te kara !" paNa lAcArI nA hoya ene. ame AkhI jiMdagImAM koI jagyAe lAcArI nahIM batAvelI. kApI nAkhe to ya lAcArI nahIM. lAcAra thavuM e hiMsA kahevAya, AtmAnI jabarajasta hiMsA kahevAya ! ane zarIra che tyAM sudhI duHkha thayA vagara chUTako nathI. paNa lAcArI to na ja hovI joIe. laghutama hovuM joIe. pote AtmA, anaMtazaktino dhaNI ! ane tyAM AgaLa ApaNe kahIe ke 'huM lAcAra chuM' e keTaluM hInapada kahevAya ? alyA, lAcArI hotI haze ? jenI pAse AtmA che, e lAcAra kema hoI zake ? AtmA hoya tyAM lAcArI nA hoI zake. enAM karatAM laghutama thA ne ! gurutama thavA gayA, to.... tamAre laghutama thavAnI icchA che ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : bahu sAruM kahevAya. praznakartA: 'prabhutAse prabhu dUra' kahe che ne ! dAdAzrI : hA, tethI ame kahyuM ke ame amArA mokSamAM rahIe ne laghutama rahIe. chatAM vaibhava ame gurutamano bhogavIe. amAro dekhAva, vartana badhuM laghutamanuM. jagatanA mATe to huM sauthI nAnAmAM nAno chuM, praznakartA : gurutama thavuM che. dAdAzrI : e tame kyAM joyeluM ? praznakartA: ApaNAmAM joyuM hoya ne ! dAdAzrI : paNa bahAranAM lokomAM to evuM nahIM karatA hoya ne ? bahAra koI mANasa haze gurutamabhAvavALA ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : ema ? badhAM emAM ja che ne ? e to ema ja jANe ke A ja AtmA che eTale Ane ja gurutama karI nAkhuM. darekane gurUmamAM ja besavAnI icchA. badhA AmAM ja ! gurutama joIe badhAne. 'bApajI' kahyuM ke khuza. eTale pAchuM gurutama vadhyuM. have javuM che emane mokSe ane thAya che gurutama. te virodha che ke avirodha ? to vahelA jaldasara mokSe jaze ? e to bhaTakavAnI nizAnI ja kahevAya ne ! kAraNa ke vyavahAramAM gurutama thavA gayelA, e badhA paDI gayelA. vyavahAramAM jeTalA jeTalA gurutama thavA gayA e badhAya phasAyA. bolo, phasAyuM ke nathI phasAyuM ? ane laghutama thayA e ja taryA. bAkI, gurutama thavuM hoya to A rasto ja nathI. A to mAra khAdhelo ane chevaTe buddha thaI gayelA ! ne UlTAM mokSanAM aMtarAya pADyA. aMtarAya Apane samajamAM AvyuM ? praznakartA : e aMtarAyane dUra kema karavA ? dAdAzrI : e dUra karavA mATe laghutamabhAva karavo joIe, to badhA

Page #188
326 AptavANI-9 'rileTiva'mAM gutama thayelA tethI. ne lokonuM khAI gayelAne malIdA, tethI. malIdA khAI jAya ne ? khAya ke nA khAya ?! emAM ya pAchuM be jAtanAM kAma kare che loko. 'rileTiva'mAM gurutA e be jAtanuM kAma kare che. eka to 'supara hyumana' tarIke kAma kare che. ane eka pAzavI kAma kare che. 'supara hyumana'nA kAma kayAM hoya, UMcA kAma karyA hoya to devagatimAM jAya ane nahIM to jAnavaramAM jaI Ave, ne tyAM AgaLa gUMcavADo nIkaLI jAya pachI ahIM manuSyamAM Ave. A nyAya huM jAte joIne Avyo chuM. emane khabara nathI ke zuM nyAya thavAno che. be paga che tenA cAra paga thaze ne uparathI pUchaDuM vadhArAnuM ! paNa emane ApaNAthI ema nA kahevAya. atyAre to e mastImAM mahAle che. e zuM kahe che ? 'paDaze tevA devAze. paDaze tyAre joI laIzuM.' te atyAre to ropha mAravA do ne ! AptavANI-9 325 aMtarAya UDI jaze. 'plasa-mAInasa' karIe ne, to badhA aMtarAya UDI jAya. eTale A badhA aMtarAyo che te gurutamabhAvathI UbhA thayelA che. ane laghutamabhAva karIe ne, to badhA aMtarAyo UDI jAya pAchA. ApaNane gustamanuM zuM kAma che ? phAyado zuM che emAM ? jeTalo UMce caDhe eTalo nIce paDe. enA karatAM nIce besI rahevuM zuM khoTuM ? kazI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM ne ! ane ApaNuM sukha ApaNI pAse hoya ane jyAre mokSe javAnuM hoya tyAre dharmAstikAya enI meLe laI jaze, tamAre kaze javAnI jarUra nathI. mATe laghutamamAM AvI jAvane, to badho ukela AvI jaze. laghutamamAM AvI javuM e ja ApaNuM pUrNapada ! amAruM A laghutama svarUpa che ane to ja gurutama svarUpa hoya. hA, laghutama thayA sivAya koI gutama thayelo nahIM. ne jyAM huM laghutama thayo chuM tyAM loko gurutama thavA phare che. ene 'rileTiva'nA guru thaI besavuM che, e 'rileTiva'mAM ja guru thavA mAge che. guru eTale 'huM kaMIka moTo thauM' evI jene bhAvanA che. 'rileTiva'mAM to je laghutama thavA phare che e UrdhvagatimAM caDhe che. paNa 'rileTiva'mAM koI laghutama thavAnuM batAvatuM ja nathI ne ! ane 'rileTiva'mAM je koI gurutama thavA jAya che, ane pachI be paga vadhe temAM koIno zo doSa ?! hA, jyAM laghu thavAnuM hoya tyAM guru thavA mAMDyo eTale enA phaLarUpe be paganA cAra paga thAya ane eka pUchaDuM vadhArAnuM. kAraNa ke gurutamathI evAM kAryo thaI jaze ke be paganA cAra paga thAya. jyAre laghutama mAnyatAthI kArya bahu suMdara thaze. paNa jagata AkhuM ja gurutA khoLe che ne ! praznakartA : eTale laghu thAya che. dAdAzrI : nA, nA, laghu nahIM, cAra pagavALA thAya che. kAraNa ke rileTIvamAM gurutama thavA jAya che eTale gurutama pAchuM peThuM. e gutamane kADhavA mATe upAya joIe ne pAcho ?! te A be paga hatA, te bIjA be paga vadhyA. eTale paDI nA javAyane ! nahIM to A gadheDA kyAMthI lAvIe ? A gAyo-bheMso kyAMthI vecAtI lAvIe ?! A to loka bicArA sArA che, suMvALA che. te gAyo-bheMso thaIne RNa cUkave che ! ladhutamane ja vare gurutama ! jagata AkhuM 'rileTiva'mAM gurutama khoLe. eTale pahelA guru thavAnI icchA, pachI gurutA kare. gurutA thayA pachI gurutama thavA phare. paNa AmAM koI gurutama thayelo nahIM. ApaNuM 'vijJAna' zuM kahe che ? 'rileTiva'mAM laghutama ane 'rIyala'mAM gurutama ! eTale e ApaNI mULa vastu che. dareka dharmavALA zuM kahe che ? ke amArA dharmathI mokSa che. koI ema kahe che ke mArA dharmathI mokSa nathI, evuM ? badhAya ema kaheze, 'amAro dharma sauthI UMcAmAM UMco.' phakta nIcAmAM nIco koNa kahI zake ? jene vItarAgamArga maLyo che, te kaheze, 'amAro dharma nIco che, paNa tamAro dharma UMco che.' kAraNa ke bALako haMmezAM nIcAne moTo kahe, moTI uMmaranA mANaso potAnI jAtane nAno kahIne pelAne moTA kahe ! ene saMtoSa che potAne. ane ApaNe koInA uparI ochA chIe ? UlaTAM ApaNe ja emanA hAtha nIcenA, tyAre to e pAMsarA haiDe, nahIM to pAMsarA nA haiDe.

Page #189
AptavANI-9 ApaNe uparI thaIe to e avaLA cAle. ApaNe kahIe ke, 'ame tamArA ziSya.' tyAre e sIdhA cAle. nahIM to cAle nahIM e sIdhA. sahune guru thavAnI bahu majhA Ave che ne jagata AkhuM 'rileTiva'mAM ja gurutA dekhADavA jAya che. ekamekanI harIphAIo hau cAle che. pelo kahe, mAre ekaso ATha zipyo." tyAre bIjo kahe, 'mArA ekaso vIsa ziSyo." A badhuM gurutA kahevAya. 'rileTiva'mAM to laghutama joIe. to paDAya nahIM, kazI upAdhi nahIM, duHkha aDe nahIM. nahIM to pachI ahIMthI bheMsa ne pADA thavuM paDe che. ahIMthI marIne, ene jevAM krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha hoya ne, te jagyAe laI jAya. eTale ema ne ema to A lokono matabheda jAya evo nathI. e to avatAra badalAya ne, to enI meLe jAya. nahIM to nA jAya. evA saraLa mANaso nathI ne ! kaheze, 'huM kaMIka chuM." alyA, zuM che te ? have A 'rileTiva'mAM koNa laghutama khoLe ? khoLe kharuM koI ? A gADImAM, TrenamAM, badhe khoLa khoLa kare to ekuMya jaDe ? tyAre A bAvAomAM koI jaDe ? badhA 'hama, hama' karyA kare. 'hama itanA zAstra jAnatA hai, itanA jAnatA hai, ye jAnatA hai' kaheze. paNa 'rileTiva'mAM jeTaluM laghutama thavAze, eTaluM 'rIyala'mAM gurutama prApta thaze. te ame laghutama thaIne beThA, to sAme A gurutama padane pAmyA. kaMI rasto agharo nathI. A samajavuM agharuM che. A laghutamano yoga kare ne, eTale bhagavAna enI pAse Ave ja. jagatamAM badhA loko gurutama yogamAM paDyA che. 'AnAM karatAM huM moTo ne enAM karatAM huM moTo." alyA, nAno thato jA ne ! Ama vyavahAramAM nAno thaI jaIza to tyAM nizcayamAM moTo, ane vyavahAramAM moTA thavA gayA e nizcayamAM nAnA rahyA. eTale laghutama yoga pakaDe ne, to e laghutama jyAre thaI rahe tyAre e gurutama thAya A bAju ! vyavahAramAM laghutama thayo e nizcayamAM gustama, eTale bhagavAnano uparI thAya. kAraNa ke bhagavAne vaza thaI jAya. te bhagavAnane uparI koI nA hoya. paNa bhagavAna emane vaza thaI jAya. te laghutama thajo have. 328 AptavANI-9 laghutama yoga jarA che agharo. paheluM jarA agharo lAge, pachI sahelo thaI jAya. jene nAnA thavuM che ene bhaya kharo ? eTale ame laghutama pahelA thayA, tyAra pachI A gurutamanI dazA amane prApta thaI. ame guru thavA rahyA nathI. guru thayA ne, e to badhA ya ahIM AgaLa A cAra gatinA cakkaramAM haju rakhaDyA ja kare che. pahelAM thoDuM puNya baMdhAya eTale devagatimAM jAya. ane devagatimAMthI pAcho ahIM Ave ne pApa baMdhAya eTale jAnavaramAM jAya pAcho ! pelA yoga karavAnA Ama, te e to badhA bahu dahADA yoga karyA. naryA anaMta avatArathI yoga ja kare che ne ! pachI loka jarA 'bApajI, bApajI' kare eTale hatuM capaTIka te ya lUMTAI jAya. thoDuM ghaNuM 'bApajI' kahe, tyAre kahe, 'ye nahIM, ye le AnA, ye le AnA, ye le AnA." eTale lUMTAI jAya pachI pAchAM. jyAre laghutamayoga to sAro. emAM to koI Ave ja nahIM, darzana karavA ja nA Ave ne ! sAdhavo yoga laghutamato ! eTale amAro yoga laghutama ! duniyAmAM koInI pAse evo yoga nA hoya. praznakartA : e yogamAM zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : dahADe dahADe halakA thavAnuM. guru nahIM thavAnuM, laghu thavAnuM, halakA thatA javAnuM. badhAnA ziSya thatAM thatAM AkhA jagatanA ziSya thaI jaze. gadheDA-kUtarA badhAnA, ane jhADa-pAna badhAnA, eTale laghutama thAya, badhAne gustama banAvIe to ladhutama thAya. gamyo tamane A yoga ? ke nahIM gamyo ? praznakartA : gamyo. dAdAzrI : yogano artha ja A thAya. kAM to gurutamano yoga pakaDayo hoya ke laghutamano yoga pakaDyo hoya, game te bemAMthI eka yoga pakaDe e.

Page #190
AptavANI-9 329 gutamano yoga thAya tyAre ahIM bhAre thAya, gurutama thAya. guruno artha ja bhAre ane bhAre eTale DUbe. ane DUbe eTale e DUbe to DUbe, paNa enI joDe besanArA ya DUbe. hA, paNa guru kyAre nA DUbe ? ke enI pAse gurukillI hoya tyAre nA DUbe. laghu eTale halako ne guru eTale bhAre. A lokone moTA thavuM che ne, te gurutama yoga ja jhAlyo che badhAe. badhAne moTA thavuM che, te mAra khAIne marI gayA. paNa pahelo naMbara koIno lAgato nathI. kAraNa ke 'resakorsa'mAM naMbara lAge ? keTalA ghoDAne InAma maLe? pAMca karoDa ghoDA doDatA hoya, emAM keTalA ghoDAne paheluM inAma maLe ? paheluM InAma to pahelA ghoDAne ja maLe ne ?! ema badhuM hAMphI hAMphIne marI jAya. mATe laghutama yoga pakaDajo. praznakartA : hA, paNa enI vidhi zuM ? dAdAzrI : enI vidhi to, A jagatamAM badhAnAM ziSya thavAnuM. koI nAlAyaka kahe to enA ziSya ApaNe thavuM ke, bhAI, tuM mAro guru. Aja teM mane zIkhavADyuM ke huM nAlAyaka chuM e !" jagaLuru ? tahIM, jagatane guru ! ane loko mane kahe che, "tamane amArA gurupade sthApana karavA che.' kahyuM, 'bhaI, nA. ahIM mane guru nA karIza. bahAra badhA guru bahu hoya che. huM to AkhA jagatane guru tarIke sthApana karIne beThelo chuM. tamane badhAne guru meM kahyA che. mane zuM karavA guru karo cho ?" huM to koIno guru nathI. huM to laghutama puruSa chuM. eTale ame kaMI kAcI mAyA nathI ke ame guru thaIe. huM koIno guru thayo nathI. huM AkhA jagatanA ziSyarUpe rahuM chuM ane badhAne huM zuM kahuM chuM ke bhaI, tame laghutama thAva. jene guru thavuM hoya tene thavA do. paNa e guruo kema karIne pote tare ane tAre ? e gurue gukillI sAthe rAkhavI paDe, to pote tare ne bIjAne tArI zake. jJAnIo ene gurukillI Ape, laghutama thavAnI gurukillI Ape, pachI guru thavAya. nahIM to A kALamAM guru thavuM e adhogatimAM javAnI nizAnI che. guru to dvApara-tratAmAM hatA 330 AptavANI-9 ne atyAre ? atyAre to AmanI pAse gurUkillI ja nathI hotI. eTale guruone huM zuM kahuM chuM ke, 'guru nA thaI besIza. nahIM to DUbIza ne bIjAne ya DUbADIza. mArI pAsethI gurukillI laI jaje." gurukillI rAkhavI paDe. te ame 'jJAnI puruSa' gurukillI ApIe tyAre enuM kAma thAya. guru 'sarTiphAIDa' hovo joIe ane joDe joDe enI pAse gurukillI hovI joIe. gurukillI eTale ? praznakartA : gurukillI eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : gurue eTaluM samajavuM joIe ke huM je guru thaI beTho chuM A lokono, tethI mAre kayo rasto levo joIe ke mane nukasAna nA thAya ne A lokone phAyado thAya ? eTale enA gurue ene zIkhavADyuM hoya ke tuM laghutama raheje. laghutama rahIne gurupaNuM karaje. hA, eTale e gurukillI che. nahIM to gurupaNAmAM gurutama thaI jaIza to mAryo jaIza. jo laghutama rahe ne, ane pachI gurupaNuM ke game te kare, enuM phaLa kharI rIte ene gurutama maLe che. paNa e Ama atyAre kare che laghutama ! praznakartA : paNa e gurue laghutama thavA mATe zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : evo laghutamano bhAva ja rAkhavAno. koI "guru" kahe to, vyavahAramAM bIjo zabda to kyAMthI lAve ? eTale 'guru' kahe to ApaNe kahevuM ke "bhaI, hA, huM emano guru thauM." paNa aMdarakhAne ApaNe jANatA hoya ke huM to laghu ja chuM. eTale dareka mANase 'rileTiva'mAM laghuthI mAMDIne laghutama thavA sudhI rAkhavuM. tyAM guru nahIM rAkhavuM. laghutamathI "ekajhekTalesa' praznakartA : Apa kaho cho ke huM laghumAM laghu AtmA chuM, mAro koI uparI nathI, huM saMpUrNa svataMtra chuM. evI rIte bIjA pote svataMtra kema nA rahI zake ? gurunI AjJAmAM rahevAnI kema jarUra ?

Page #191
AptavANI-9 331 dAdAzrI : badhA svataMtra ja che ne ! gurunI AjJAmAM rahevAnI zI jarUra che ?! 'mahIM'vALAnI AjJAmAM rahevAnuM che. paNa A to ene mahIM krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha mAra mAryA ja kare che. eTale svataMtra koNa thaI zake ? jenA krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha jatAM rahe, tyAre svataMtra thAya. nahIM to svataMtra ema ne ema thavAya nahIMne ! ane gurunI AjJA to ziSyane paravaDatI hoya to pALe ne nA paravaDatI hoya to nA pALe. kaMI mArI AjJA nathI e. e to emanI potAnI AjJA che. huM to vaDhato ja nathI koIne. koIne Aja sudhI vaco ja nathI. A badhAne kahI dIdheluM ke tamAro ziSya huM chuM. 'bAya rileTiva vyUpoInTa' huM badhAno ziSya chuM, laghutama chuM. 'bAya rIyala vyUpoInTa' huM gurutama chuM. eTale vyAvahArika draSTithI, mArAthI koI nIco nathI, mArAthI badhA moTA che. ane kharI draSTithI, bhagavAnanI draSTithI mArAthI koI moTo nathI. evuM huM to kahuM chuM. tamane samaja paDIne ? vAta samajAI tamane ? eTale A badhA mArA uparI ja kahevAya ne ? ne A badhAno ziSya huM chuM. praznakartA : ahIM ApanI pAse to meLavavA Ave che. guru hoya e meLavavA zI rIte Ave ? dAdAzrI : ame to laghutama thaI gayelA. e badhAya haju laghutama thayA nathI ne ! laghutama thAya to mArA jevA thaI jAya. bAkI, jJAna badhuM ApeluM che. ciMtA nA thAya, 'varIjha' nA thAya, dhaMdho karatAM ye rAga-dveSa nA thAya, evuM 'jJAna' ne e badhuM ja ApeluM che. paNa laghutama nA thAya tyAM sudhI amArA jevuM pada nA thAya. praznakartA : badhAne tame guru kahyA, e badhA pachI ziSyo kyAre thaze ? ne kaI rIte thAya ? dAdAzrI : A to have dhIme dhIme e ja prayatna mAMDyo che, ke 'dAdA' jevA ja ApaNe thaI javuM che. amAre phakta koIne vaDhavAnI zarata nathI. juo ne thAva, basa ! laghutama thAva to ja barAbara 'ekjhekTanesa' AvI gaI. eTale eTaluM kAma bAkI che. 332 AptavANI-9 varlDano ziSya ja, varlDano uparI ! ApaNA 'vijJAna'mAM to 'dAdA' tamArA ziSya thAya che. ATalA badhAne 'jJAna' ApyuM, e badhAyano huM ziSya chuM. huM to AkhA 'varlDa'no ziSya chuM. AkhA 'varlDa'no uparI koNa thaI zake ? je AkhA 'varlDa'no ziSya thayo nathI e AkhA 'varlDa'no uparI nathI. praznakartA : dattAtraya bhagavAne jyAM jyAMthI sadguNo maLyA, e dareka vyaktimAMthI lIdhA ane kahevAya che ke covIsa guruo emanA jIvanamAM AvyA. have zAstro ema kahe che ke guru to eka ja hovA joIe. to Apa kaMI prakAza Apo. dAdAzrI : guru to AkhA jagatane karavA jevuM che. jyAMthI kaMI ApaNane jJAna maLe te prApta karI levuM. bAkI evuM che ne, guru eka hovA joIe eno artha zo che ? ke kiMDara gArTana, pharsTa sTAnDarDa, sekanDa sTAnDarDa, e badhAne mATe eka guru joIe. ane kolejamAM jAya ne, tene covIsa guru joIe ane 'apara koleja'mAM jAya ne, to ene AkhA jagatanA loko joDe ziSya thavuM paDe. eTale ame AkhA jagatanA ziSya thaIne beThA chIe. e 'apara koleja'mAM jAya tyAre. paNa pahelA eka guru karavAnA kyAM sudhI ? kinDaragArTana, pharsTa sTAnDarDa, sekanDa sTAnDarDa, tyAM sudhI eka guru ! kAraNa ke A nIcalA sTAnDarDanA lokone zIkhavADeluM, je haju bALaka avasthAmAM che, ke 'bhaI, tuM ahIM AgaLa ATaluM ja karaje, bIje DAphAM nA mArIza.' nahIM to pAchuM bagaDI jAya, DoLiyuM thaI jAya. eTale ene baMdhAraNa bAMdhI Ape. paNa pachI AgaLanuM sTAnDarDa Ave eTale badhA AkhA jagatane guru karavA jevuM, ne nIcalA sTAnDarDavALAne eka ja guru karavA jevA ! koI kaheze ke, 'sAheba mAre eka guru karelo che.' to huM samajI jauM ke A sekanDa sTAnDarDano che. to huM kahuM, barobara che tArI vAta.' tamane khulAso thayo ? praznakartA : hA, thayo. dAdAzrI : bAkI, chellA guru to, A jagatamAM jIvamAtrane guru

Page #192
AptavANI-9 333 karavA jevA che. kAraNa ke mahAvIra bhagavAne zuM karyuM ? ke jIvamAtrane guru tarIke pote sthApyA ane pote ziSya tarIke rahyA. AkhA jagatanA jIvamAtrane jemaNe guru karyA che ! kAraNa ke badhAnI pAse jANavAnuM hoya che. jJAta', ApyuM ke meLavyuM ? A mAruM akrama vijJAna tamArA badhA pAsethI meM jANyuM che ane tame loko mane ema kaho cho ke, 'tame amane jJAna Apo cho.' paNa A akrama vijJAna tamArA badhA thakI meM jANyuM che. ahIM pustakomAM che nahIM A akrama vijJAna. to kyAMthI AvyuM ? A badhA thakI. emanuM potAnuM jJAna e ApatA gayA ane bIjuM jJAna letA gayA. emane je pacatuM nahotuM. e jJAna mane ApatA gayA ane bIjuM jJAna emane je pace evuM hatuM e letA gayA. eTale emane je pacatuM nahotuM, te jJAna mArI pAse bheguM thayuM, te akrama tarIke ughADuM thayuM. praznakartA : paNa amArA badhAM bhaMgAranI aMdarathI AvuM akrama vijJAna nIkaLyuM ? dAdAzrI : nA, bhaMgAra nahIM. tamane je jJAna pacyuM nahotuM ne tamArI pAse ajIrNa thayeluM hatuM ne paDI raheluM, te ahIM mArI pAse AvI gayuM badhuM ane tamane jIrNa thAya evuM tame ahIMthI laI gayA. eTale phula jJAna mArI pAse AvyuM. phula jJAna, pUrNa virAma jJAna ! have A lokone vAta zI rIte samajAya te ? A to bhaNelAgaNelA mANaso samaje. bIjA lokonuM kAma nahIMne, bicArAnuM. A to 'sAyaTiphika' vijJAna che. vijJAna eTale A phorenanAM sAyaTisTo besIne sAMbhaLe to e badhAne 'ekasepTa' karavuM paDe !! oLakhavuM pada 'jJAtI'tuM ! temAM A koI mANasa mane to page lAgato ja nathI, ne lokone ema lAge che ke A badhA mane page lAge che. paNa huM to A zarIramAM eka miniTa paNa raheto nathI, paccIsa varSathI eka miniTa paNa rahyo 334 AptavANI-9 nathI. ane loko to niraMtara te rUpe rahe che ke huM ja chuM A, hAthe ya huM chuM ne page ya huM chuM ne mAthuM ya huM chuM ne A badhuM ya huM ja chuM ! eTale A mana-vacana-kAyAthI huM tadana judo rahuM chuM. eTale Ane gALo bhAMDe-mAre, to ya mane vAMdho nA Ave ne ! loko mane oLakhatA ja nathI ! zI rIte mane gALa daI zake ? ane je mane oLakhe che te to paramAtmA tarIke oLakhe che. eTale e badhA loko mane gALa deya nahIM ne kazuM AvuM tevuM e bAjunuM vartana ja nA hoya ne ! ane loko to 'e.ema.paTela' tarIke oLakhe che agara to guru tarIke oLakhe che. paNa huM koIno guru thaI beTho ja nathI. huM to laghutama puruSa chuM. jJAnI tarIke, jJAnI je kahevAya che e tarIke huM ladhutama chuM bilakula. amane koI paNa jAtanI bhIkha nA hoya, tethI amane A pada maLyuM che. je sarvazreSTha pada, je AkhA brahmAMDamAM moTAmAM moTuM pada, te prApta thayeluM che. koI paNa jAtanI bhIkha rahI nathI mATe ! kAraNa ke je lakSmInI bhIkha che ne, te amane hoya nahIM. amane sonAnA DhagalA pAthare to ya amAre kAma nA lAge. viSayano vicAra nA Ave, uparathI devIo Ave to ya amane vicAra Ave nahIM. amane mAnanI bhIkha nA hoya, kIrtinI bhIkha nA hoya, ziSyonI bhIkha nA hoya, derAM baMdhAvAnI bhIkha nA hoya. have mAruM svarUpa, jJAnI samajazo to tame jJAnI thazo. tame AcArya svarUpa mAruM samajo to tame AcArya svarUpa thazo. mAruM svarUpa AcArya tame samajo to mane vAMdho nathI, paNa tame AcArya svarUpa thazo. tamAre je jarUra hoya e svarUpa amAruM jANazo, te tame thazo. mAre kazuM thavuM nathI. huM to thaIne beTho chuM. cAra DigrIno nApAsa thayelo mANasa ! huM to nApAsa thaIne laghutama thaIne beThelo chuM. eTale amAruM pada jene je samajavuM hoya eTalo e rUpa thaze. A vAta samajAya to kAma nIkaLI jAya. vartavuM 'pote' laghutama bhAve ! laghutama pada sivAya A jagatamAM koI pada nAnuM nathI. have evo

Page #193
336 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 335 tamane bhAva thaI gayA pachI tamane kazo bho kharo ? bAkI, moTA thavAnI bhAvanAthI moTA thavAya nahIM. tame laghutama padamAM raho to ja enuM phaLa gutama Ave. eTale A vyavahAra laghutamapadamAM hoya, A 'caMdubhAI" laghutama padamAM rahe to peluM gustama pada enI meLe prApta thAya, nahIM to gurutama pada prApta nA thAya. praznakartA : Ape je "jJAna ApyuM e laghutama padanI prApti karAvatuM nathI ? dAdAzrI : hA, e laghutama pada Ape. paNa A haju gurutama bhAva gayo nathI ne ! vyavahAramAM gurutama gayuM nathI ne ! A gurutamabhAva chUTyo nathI. 'huM kaMIka chuM' evuM rahe che e kADhI nAkhavAnuM. vAtane jo samaje to ukela Ave. bAkI nA samaje to Ano ukela nathI Ave evo. pUrNa thavA mATe laghutama bhAva jevo bIjo koI bhAva che nahIM ne jagatamAM agharAmAM agharo bhAva hoya to laghutamabhAva. e laghutamabhAva jagata kevI rIte pAmI zake ? valDano eka paNa mANasa laghutamabhAva pAmI zake nahIM. je laghutamabhAvane tame pAmyA cho, e "varlDamAM koI paNa mANasa pAmI zake nahIM. e sahelI vastu nathI, bahu agharAmAM agharI vastu che e. loko kahe, 'bhaI, kemanuM?" tyAre ApaNe kahIe, 'hAryA bhaI, hAryA." have ApaNe hAryA kahIe eTale 'riyala'mAM gurutama thayo enI meLe kudaratI. eTale laghutama thavAno bhAva hovo joIe. bAkI moTo thayo ke bhaTakyo. moTo thayo ne moTuM mAnyuM ke bhaTakyo. pUrNa puruSo moTA hotAM ja nathI. A to badhA adhUrA ghaDA ja moTA thAya che. pUrNa puruSano avAja ja nA thAya. koIne gurUtama nA thavuM hoya evuM che koI ? A vyavahAramAM moTA loko che te ya Ama dekhAya ke laghutama thavA phare che, bahAra dekhAvamAM laghutama dekhAya. paNa hoya mahIM bhAva gurutamano ke 'huM kaMIka chuM' badhA karatAM ! Ama, bahAra bahu sArA mANasa kahevAya vyavahArika rIte, paNa te 'vastu' koI dahADo pAme nahIM. e to A 'riyala' ke 'rileTiva'nI DimArkezana lAIna rAkhaze to ja pAmaze. nahIM to A saMsAranAM jhaghaDA ochA thAya nahIM. 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' ! dhI varlDa ijha dhI pajhala', 'iTaselpha" "pajhala' thayeluM che A. 'goDa hejha noTa pajhalDa dhIsa varlDa eTa oNla'. A pote 'ITaselpha' 'pajhala' thayeluM che. koyaDo, gahana koyaDo thaI gayo che A. dhera Ara Tu nyU poInTa Tu solva dhIsa pajhala. vana rileTiva yU poInTa, vana riyala nyU poInTa.' te A 'rileTiva' ne 'rIyala', enI 'lAIna opha DimArkazana' jo koI "jJAnI puruSa' nAkhI Ape to "pajhala' 'solva' thAya. have 'rileTiva' ane 'rIyalanI 'lAIna opha DimArkazana' eka tIrthakara bhagavAna sivAya koInI pAse hatI nahIM. covIsa tIrthaMkaroe e 'lAIna' 'karekTa' nAkhelI ane A bIjA paNa keTalAka jJAnIo thaI gayA, emaNe karekTa' nAkhelI. ne pachI ApaNe A 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' 'ekkekTa' nAkhelI che. kAraNa ke jJAnI kone kahevAya ? ke tIrthakara jevAM jJAnI joIe. hA, ke je thoDAka ja pheraphAravALA hoya. je 'rileTiva' ane 'rIyala'mAM lAIna opha DimArkazana 'ekkekTa' nAkhI Ape ke dhIsa ijha rIyala enDa dhIsa ijha rileTiva'. A to jagatamAM zuM thayuM che? 'rileTiva'ne ja 'riyala' mAnavAmAM AvyuM che. rileTivane rIyala mAnIne ja A loko cAlyA che. e ekya dahADo rIyala thayA nahIM ne dahADo vaLe nahIM. te anaMta avatArathI bhaTaka, bhaTaka, bhaTaka kare che. keTalI ye yonimAM bhaTaka, bhaTaka kare che. sAcI 'lAIna opha DimArkazana' nA paDI, tethI ja to jagata AkhuM mUMjhAyuM che ane tethI 'rileTiva'ne ja "rIyala' mAnyuM che, ane tene ja gurutama karavA mAge che. jene laghutama karavAnuM tene ja gurutama kare, enuM nAma bhrAMti ! ane pAcho zuM kahe che ? 'ame bhrAMti khaseDI rahyA chIe.' alyA, A bhrAMti to vadhI rahI che. tamane evuM nathI lAgatuM? A koI prayoga hoya, ane te koI sAyansavALo prayoga kare ane

Page #194
338 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 337 huM prayoga karavA besuM. have huM jANato nA houM to zuM thAya AmAM ? praznakartA : bhaDAko thAya. dAdAzrI : hA, te sAmAna nakAmo jAya, mahenata nakAmI jAya, ne AMgaLI baLI jAya te judI ! kAraNa ke pAchI AMgaLI ghAlIne jouM, to zuM thAya ?! ne pelo sAyaTisTa AMgaLI ghAlIne jue to ye dajhAya nahIM. tamane samaja paDIne ? eTale A prayogano jANakAra hovo joIe. A to meM tamane 'rileTiva-rIyala'nI 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' nAkhI ApI che, eTale tamane vAMdho nahIM. rileTiva'mAM laghutamabhAva ! have ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ? ke bhaI, tamane e 'DimArkazana lAIna' 'ekkekTa' paDI gaI ke ATaluM 'rileTiva' ne ATaluM 'rIyala". ane "rIyala'mAM AvuM che, "rIyala'mAM zuddhAtmA. ane 'rileTiva'mAM tamane pAMca vAkyo ApyAM che. bIjuM badhuM to nikAlI che. praznakartA : e nikAla thato jAya che ? dAdAzrI : hA, enI meLe nikAla thayA ja kare che. saMDAsanA mATe rAha jovI paDe nahIM. ane rAha jue e mUrakha gaNAya. eTale A bIjuM badhuM nikAlI che. to have thavAnuM zuM ? praznakartA : laghutama ! dAdAzrI : laghutama ! basa, eTalo ja bhAva. ne 'dAdA'nI AjJA laghutamabhAvamAM che. eTale have tamAre 'rileTiva'mAM phakta laghutama thavAnI jarUra che. eTale "rIyala' ane 'rileTiva' vacce 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' Ave ane 'rileTiva'mAM pote laghutama thAya to ahIMnA saMsAranA du:khomAM ya samAdhi rahe, ne e ja sAcI samAdhi ! tame keTalA laghutama thayA cho ? praznakartA: 'dAdA'ne khabara. mane enuM tharmomiTara barobara khabara nathI paDatI. dAdAzrI : paNa kaMI thayA cho laghutama ? keTalA ? be AnI ? cAra AnI ? praznakartA : paNa evuM kevI rIte mApa kaDhAya ? dAdAzrI : e to koInI joDe laDhatA hoya tyAre khabara paDI jAya, ke tame laghutama pUrepUrA thayA nathI. haju to tame ApI do barAbara, ke 'tuM zuM hisAbamAM ?" eTale have ApaNe laghutama khoLavAnuM. tamAre gurutama thavuM che ke laghutama ? praznakartA : laghutama. dAdAzrI : Ama be hAtha joDIe e to game che ane kaho cho mAre laghutama thavuM che." A badhA Ama hAtha joDe ne, to khuza. ane pAchuM kaheze, 'mAre have laghutama thavuM che." mAla bharelo badho evo vasamo che, gurutamano ja mAla bharyo chene badho. to ya ApaNe draSTi zuM rAkhavI? praznakartA : laghutama thavAnI. dAdAzrI : to aMdara AtmA gurUtama thato jAya. 'ame laghutama thaIne beThelA chIe. amAro 'AtmA' gurutama che. tamAre paNa e draSTi sevana karavAnI. bIjuM zuM, AmAM bahu agharuM che nahIM kazuM. ane pachI ApaNuM 'sAyansa' zuM kahe che? 'akrama vijJAna' zuM kahe che ? 'rileTiva'mAM tame jeTalA laghutama thazo eTaluM 'rIyalamAM tame gurutama thazo, saMpUrNa thazo. have e zuM khoTuM kahe che? bAkI, 'rileTiva'mAM to A jagata AkhuM gurutama thavA phare che. tethI A pADA ne bheMso badhuM UbhuM rahyuM che. te kone lIdhe UbhuM rahyuM che ? ATalI bhUlathI ja. te A bhUla bhAMgavI nahIM joIe, manuSyamAM AvIne ? bhAMgavI joIe evuM lAge che ne ? pUrNa laghutama, tyAM pUrNatva ! je 'rileTiva'mAM Divelyuezana thaI gayo, te "rIyala'mAM paramAtmA

Page #195
340 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 339 thaI gayo. eTale 'rileTiva'mAM Divelyuezana' thavAnI jarUra. khAva-pIvo, haro-pharo ane 'Divelyuezana' karavAnuM. bIjuM kazuM ya nahIM. ApaNe ahIM rUpiyAnA 'Divelyuezana' thayA kare che, tethI karIne pablIkane asara thaI jAya che kazI ? cAlyA ja kare che. e to 'Divelyuezana' thAya, ghaDImAM 'elIvezana' thAya, vadhe-ghaTe ! pablIkane zuM emAM levAdevA ? ema A 'rileTiva'nuM 'Divelyuezana' karavAmAM kazuM nukasAna nathI. UlaTo naryo napho che. heya, AnaMdathI rahevAnuM. te A ame jo 'Divelyuezana' karIne beThA chIe, eTale jo kevI majhA Ave che ! have huM zuM kahuM chuM? 'rileTiva'mAM tame jeTalA 'Divelyuezana' thazo eTale 'rIyala'mAM paramAtmA pada khIlaze. eTale sahelAmAM sahelo rasto che ne ? e kaMI agharuM kazuM ? bIjuM kazuM AmAM samajavAnuM nathI. ane laghutama tamane ciMtA nahIM karAve. jyAM 'Divelyuezana'mAM UtaryA, juone have paisAnI 'Divelyuezana' karI nAkhI to paisAnI che ciMtA atyAre koI jAtanI ? pahelAM 'velyuezana' hatI, to keTalI ciMtA hatI ! rUpiyA beMkamAM laI jatA hoya to 'kApI nAkhaze' evuM bhaDakatA hatA. atyAre to koI kApanAro nahIM ne kazuM ja nahIM. kazI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM. 'Divelyuezana' thaI jAya eTale che kazI bhAMjagaDa ? hA, pAMca abaja rUpiyA ApaNI pAse hoya, paNa nIce besatA AvaDyuM, bIjI rIte laghutama thato gayo, ke peNe gurutama thaI gayo. 'rileTiva'mAM je ladhutama thavA prayatna kare, tenuM saheje 'rIyala'mAM gurutama thAya, paramAtma pada thAya. gurutama thavA mATe kazuM karavAnuM nA hoya. eTale vyavahAramAM vAta karavI hoya to 'mArAthI koI jIva nAno nahIM ane sahuthI nAnAmAM nAno huM' evuM bhAna rahe eTale bahu thaI gayuM. have tame laghutama thazo to ja tamane mULa pada prApta thaze ane to ja bhagavAna pada tamAruM thaze. eTale jeTaluM laghutama, 'kamplITa' laghutama e bhagavAna pada ! eTale ApaNe 'rileTiva'mAM laghutama thavAno prayatna karo to kudaratI rIte pelAmAM gurutama thAya ane pUrNatva thAya. AtmAnI pUrNatva je dazA che e kudaratI rIte ja thAya, 'ejhekTa' enI meLe ja thaI jAya. dhyeya, ladhutama padano ! tame laghutama puruSa joyelA A jagatamAM ? praznakartA : dAdA pote ja laghutama che ne ! dAdAzrI : hA, eTale basa, A laghutama puruSane jovAnA. ne tevuM tamAre thavAnuM che, bIjuM zuM ? ahIM bIjuM zIkhavAnuM kazuM nathI. ApaNA mahAtmAo samajI gayA ke laghutama 'dAdA'e zIkhavADyuM ! have dAdA ja laghutama thayA che eTale bIjAne paNa laghutama thaye ja chUTako che ne ! ane evo ja dhyaya karavA jevo che. bIjuM kazuM karavA jevuM jagatamAM nathI, jo kharuM sukha joItuM hoya to. ame A 'rileTiva'mAM laghutamanI jagyA upara beThelA chIe, tamane badhAne e ja kahIe chIe ke Ama thaI jAva. bIjuM kazuM kahetA ja nathI ne ! mane lAge che tamAre varSa dahADo lAgaze laghutama thatAM ?' praznakartA : paNa A laghutama thavAnuM, e to bahu moTI vastu che. dAdAzrI : nA, evI moTI vastu nathI. 'ApaNe' nakkI karyuM ne, ke 'mAre laghutama thavuM che' to mana-buddhi-citta-ahaMkAra A badhA e bAju ja jayA kare ! eTale dhyeya nakkI karyo, te bAju jAya. 'tame' kaho ke mAre atyAre sAntAkrujha javuM che, to te bAju ja jAya. mATe dhyeya nakkI karo. bAkI, duniyAmAM ya koI 'laghutama thavuM che' evuM nakkI ja nA kare. ApaNA "jJAna" lIdhelA mahAtmAo ja evuM nakkI kare ke, 'laghutama thavuM che.' kAraNa ke sAcuM jJAna pAmelA che ne pelA, e lokone to bhrAMti che. ladhutamabhAvatI khumArI ! eTale A 'jJAna' pachI 'lAIna opha DimArkezana' ApI, 'rileTiva-rIyala'nuM 'eDajasTamenTa' thayuM. have laghutama padamAM khumArI

Page #196
342 AptavANI-9 sva'-bhAva pAmavo e ja gurutama ! 'pote' laghutama thaI jAya eTale AtmA gurutama, eTale AtmAne gurutama karavAnI jarUra nathI. ApaNe phakta laghutama thavAnI jarUra che. praznakartA : ApaNe laghutama thaIe to AtmA gurUtama thAya. paNa AtmA to agurulaghu svabhAvano che. dAdAzrI : e aguru-laghu svabhAvano che, e vAta enI evI nathI. gurutamano artha zuM ? ke aguru-ladhu svabhAva sudhI javuM, enuM nAma gurutama kahevAya. AptavANI-9 341 hovI joIe ApaNane. khumArI zenI ? jagata AkhuM gurutamanI khumArI rAkhe to ApaNe zenI khumArI rAkhIe ? laghutamanI, eTale AmAM bIjuM kazuM bahu UMDuM che nahIM. loka kahe che ke zuM 'dAdA'nI khumArI che ! have khumArI to ajJAnatAmAM hoya. paNa A ya eka khumArI che ne ! ke je khumArI badalAya ja nahIM koI dahADo ya, eka sekanDe ya badalAya nahIM. evA ne evA, jyAre juo tyAre evA ne evA ja ! saMjogo badhA badalAya, paNa 'dAdA' badalAya nahIM ne ! ane ApaNe ya chevaTe emanA jevA ja thavAnuM che. ApaNo dhyeya e ja hovo joIe. te A meM tamane 'lAIna opha DimArkazana' nAkhI ApI. have tame laghutamanI khumArImAM raho. have dhaMdho karo, to e to "vyavasthita"nA tAbAmAM che. tamAre to phakta Amane kahevAnuM, caMdubhAIne kahevAnuM ke, 'bhaI, kAma karyuM jAva. cA pIvI hoya to cA pIvo, paNa kAma karo." ATaluM ja kahevAnuM. eTale ApaNane to laghutamanI khumArI rahevI joIe. gurutamanI khumArI to sahu lokoe rAkhI. paNa ApaNane khumArI zenI rahevI joIe ? praznakartA : ladhutamanI. dAdAzrI : hA, beMkamAM rUpiyA che tenI khumArI nahIM rAkhavAnI. laghutamanI khumArI rAkhavAnI. tamane phAvaze e vAta ? praznakartA : hA, phAvaze. dAdAzrI : ane A vijJAnamAM to chokarAM-choDIo paiNAvAya, pAghaDIo paherIne paiNAvAya. kazuM naDe nahIM. kAraNa ke e badhuM 'rileTiva che ane temAM laghutama pada para beThA pachI cho ne, pAghaDIo be paherI hoya. mane kaMI vAMdho nathI. kAraNa ke tamArI khumArI zemAM che ? laghutama padamAM ! gutama padanI khumArI hoya tene bhAMjagaDa. paNa laghutama padanI khumArI to rahe ja ne ! praznakartA : paNa 'rIyala'mAM to aguru-ladhu svabhAva nahIM ? dAdAzrI : e pAchuM juduM. A agurulaghu e mULa svabhAva che ane A vyavahArika jyAM che tyAM e ladhutama thayo eTale rIyala'mAM gurutama thayo. huM nirAMte ladhutama rahuM chuM to AtmA mAro gurutama rahe che TheTha sudhI. enI 'TesTa ekajhAminezana' ! praznakartA: Apa 'rileTiva'mAM laghutama thayA, eno dAkhalo Apo. dAdAzrI : dAkhalAmAM to ame A UghADuM, bolatuM upaniSada ja chIe ne ! bolatuM purANa chIe ne !! | rileTiva'mAM laghutama thavuM eTale tamane samajAvuM. ahIMthI tamane eka gADImAM laI jatA hoya ane bIjAM oLakhANavALA AvyA eTale tamane pachI kaheze, 'have UtarI jAva." eTale kaMI paNa 'iphekTa' sivAya utarI javuM. pharI pAcho thoDIvAra pachI kaheze, 'nA, nA. tame Avo." pharI pAchA tamane besADyA to tame besI jAva. pharI bIjA oLakhANavALA maLe tyAre tamane kahe, 'UtarI jAva." to kaMI paNa 'iphekTa' sivAya UtarI paDavuM. ne kaMI paNa 'iphekTa' sivAya caDhavuM. evuM ATha-dasa vakhata

Page #197
AptavANI-9 343 thAya to zuM thAya ? A mANasone zuM thAya ? phATI jAya. jema dUdha phATI jAya ema phATI jAya ! praznakartA: eka ja vakhatamAM phATI jAya. dAdAzrI : ane mane satyAvIsa vakhata kare to ya evo ne evo ! ane pAcho jaIne pAcho hau AvuM. e kaheze, "nA, nA. tame pAchA Avo.' to pAcho hau AvuM. kAraNa ke ame laghutama thayA chIe. 344 AptavANI-9 mAnyatA evI thAya che ke huM badhAthI nAno chuM ane e paNa eka jAtano ahaMkAra ja che. evuM che, A laghuno artha 'nAno chuM thayuM. pachI laghutara eTale ke nAnAthIye huM nAno chuM. ane laghutama eTale mArAthI badhA ja moTA che evo ahaMkAra. eTale e paNa eka jAtano ahaMkAra che ! have je gurUtama ahaMkAra che, eTale ke moTA thavAnI bhAvanAo, huM A badhAthI moTo chuM evI mAnyatAo che, enAthI A saMsAra Ubho thayo che. jyAre laghutama ahaMkArathI mokSa tarapha javAya. laghutama ahaMkAra eTale huM to A badhAthI nAno chuM' ema karIne vyavahAra badho calAvavo. enAthI mokSa tarapha cAlyo jAya. 'huM moTo chuM evuM mAne che tethI A jagata 'resakorsa'mAM Utare che ane e badhA bhAna bhUlIne avaLe raste jaI rahyA che. jo laghutamano ahaMkAra hoyane, te laghu thato thato ekadama laghutama thaI jAya. eTale e paramAtmA thaI jAya ! emAM resakorsa' ja nahIM ! phAunDezana' akrama vijJAnatA ! laghutama e to ApaNuM kendra ja che. e kendramAM beThA beThA gustama prApta thAya. ApaNI to navIna 'thiyarI'o badhI, tadana navI ! laghutamabhAvamAM rahevuM ane abhedadraSTi rAkhavI e A akrama vijJAnanuM 'phAunDezana" che. 'A' vijJAnanuM 'phAunDezana' zuM ? laghutamabhAvamAM rahevuM ane abheda draSTi rAkhavI. jIvamAtranI joDe, AkhA brahmAMDanA jIvo sAthe abheda draSTi rAkhavI e ja A vijJAnanuM 'phAunDezana' che. A vijJAna kaMI ema ne ema 'phAunDezana" vagara nathI. bIjI badhI kriyAo enI meLe thayA ja kare che, 'mikenikalI' thayA ja kare che. 'draSTiane 'mikenikala', e bene bahu 'Dipharansa' che. draSTi ja mukhya vastu che ne 'mikenikala' e vastu judI che. jagatanA ziSya thavAnI draSTi vedI nathI, te jagatamAM "mahAvIra' thaI zake nahIM. nAno chokaro hoya, bALaka hoya, mUrakha hoya, te badhAnAM ziSya thavAnI draSTi ! ladhutama ahaMkArathI mokSa tarapha ! praznakartA : e laghutamano artha kevI rIte karyo ? je ApaNo ahaMkAra che e ahaMkAra jhIro DigrI para Ave e laghutama che ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. ahaMkAra to emano ema ja che. paNa ahaMkAranI atyAra sudhI to gurutama thavAno prayatna karyo hato ne ? hA, AmanA karatAM huM moTo thauM, AmanAM karatA huM moTo thauM ! juo ne, 'resakorsa' cAlyo che. temAM InAma kone ? pahelA ghoDAne ja phakta. ne bIjA badhAne ? doDe eTaluM ja. eTaluM ja doDe, to ye emane inAma nahIM. praznakartA : dAdA, laghutamapadanI aMdara 'resakorsa' kharuM ? dAdAzrI : nA, 'resakorsa hoya nahIM. laghutama AvyuM tyAM 'resakorsa hoya nahIM. 'resakorsa' to gurutamamAM hoya badhuM. eTale mAre to laghutama pada ane buddhi nahIM, tethI mAre koInI joDe levAya nahIM ne devA ya nahIM ne ! buddhino chAMTo ja nahIM ne ! doDe badhA, InAma ekate !! praznakartA H darekanI evI icchA hoya ne, ke huM kaMIka thayuM ane ahIM

Page #198
AptavANI-9 345 ApanI pAse evI icchA thAya ke huM kAMI na thauM, vizeSatA bilakula nA joIe. tyAM vyavahAranI aMdara hoya ke huM kaMIka chuM ne mAre kaMIka thavuM che. dAdAzrI : kAraNa ke tyAM 'resakorsa'mAM paDe che ne ! ATalA badhA ghoDA doDe emAM e ya doDe. alyA, tuM mAMdo che, besI rahe ne, chAnomAno ! ane e to 'sTroMga' ghoDA. ane temAM ya A badhA ghoDAomAM pahelA naMbaravALAne ja inAma maLavAnAM ane bIjA badhA to hAMphI hAMphIne marI javAnA. eTale A harIphAImAM koI mUrkhA ya mahIM nA paDe. hA, basso pAMcaso ghoDAne inAma ApatA hoya to ApaNo naMbare ya lAgI jAya ema mAnIe. paNa alyA, pahelo naMbara to lAgavAno nathI. to zuM karavA amatho A 'resakorsa'mAM paDyo che ? sUI jAne, ghera jaIne. A 'resakorsa'mAM koNa Utare ? AmanA 'resakorsa'mAM kyAM UtarAya te ? koI ghoDo keTalo joradAra hoya ! koI caNA khAtuM hoya, koI ghAsa khAtuM hoya !! eTale huM A saMsAramAM 'resakorsa'mAM paDyo nahIM. tethI mane A 'bhagavAna' jaDyA ! ne InAma to pahelA naMbaravALAne ja ! bIjA badhA to rakhaDI mare. hAMphI hAMphIne marI jAya to ya kazuM nahIM. evA nyAyavALA jagatamAM 'resakorsa'mAM paDAtuM haze ? tamane kema lAge che ? praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : ane manuSyano svabhAva spardhAvALo ja hoya. lokomAM spardhA hoya ne ? praznakartA : hoya ne ! e to pANI thAya. dAdAzrI : dareka kSetramAM spardhA hoya ja. are, gharamAM ya jo trIjo mANasa Avyo hoya, e dalIlabAjI kare evo hoya, to dhaNIdhaNiyANImAMya spardhA cAle pachI. pelI baI Ama bole, tyAre A bhAI kaheze, 'besa, tuM to Ama kare che. paNa huM to Ama karI nAkhuM evo chuM.' 346 AptavANI-9 alyA, beu ghoDA doDyA ! koNa inAma Apaze tamane ? eTale ame to kahI daIe ke 'hIrAbAne jevuM AvaDe evuM amane AvaDatuM nathI.' eTale ame doDavA daIe. khUba doDo, doDo, doDo ! pachI hIrAbA ye kahe, 'tame bhoLA cho.' meM kahyuM, 'hA, barobara che.' eTale A loko spardhA kare che ne, tethI duHkha Ave che. A to 'resakorsa'mAM Utare che. A 'resakorsa' je cAle che ene joyA kara, ke A kayo ghoDo pahelo Ave che ?! e joyA kare to jonArane kaMI du:kha thatuM nathI. 'resakorsa'mAM Utare che tene duHkha thAya che. mATe 'resakorsa'mAM UtaravA jevuM nathI. TIkA, potAnuM ja bagADe ! ane bIjuM, koInI ye TIkA karavA jevuM nathI. TIkA karanAranuM potAnuM bagaDe che. koI paNa mANasa kazuM kare, temAM TIkA karanAra potAnAM kapaDAM to pahelAM bagADe. ane ethI vadhAre UMDo Utare to zarIra bagADe. ane ethI vadhAre UMDo Utare to hradaya bagADe. eTale A TIkA e to potAnuM bagADavAnuM sAdhana che. AmAM UtaravuM nahIM joIe. e jANavA khAtara jANavuM. bAkI, emAM UtaravuM nahIM joIe. A avatAra TIkA karavA mATe nathI maLyo ane koI ApaNI TIkA kare to noMdha levA jevI nathI. praznakartA : TIkA karanAra jIvane ApaNA kAmamAM kaMI rasa paDyo hoya tyAre ja TIkA kare. dAdAzrI : A TIkA e to ahaMkArano mULa guNa che. e spardhAno guNa che eTale TIkA to rahevAnI ja. ane spardhA vagara saMsAramAM rahevAya nahIM. e spardhA jAya eTale chUTakAro thaI gayo. A upavAsa kare che e ya badhuM spardhAnA guNathI UbhA thAya. 'pelAe paMdara karyA to huM trIsa karuM.' chatAM e TIkA karavA jevI vastu nathI. TIkA karavAthI pahelAM ApaNA kapaDAM bagaDe che, bIjI TIkAthI deha bagaDe che ane trIjI TIkAthI hradaya bagaDe che. basa, eTaluM ja ! mATe

Page #199
348 AptavANI-9 eTale ame A cokhkhuM ja kahIe chIe ne, ke 'bhaI, amane A vyavahAramAM AvI samajaNa paDatI nathI.' eTale tyAre ja amane e choDe ne ! AvuM kahIe tyAre upAdhi mukta thaIe ne !! Ate AvaData kema kahevAya ? bAkI, samajaNavALA to ahIM badhA bahu maLI Ave ne ! evAM hoya che ne, te e kaheze, "sAheba, tamAro kesa huM jItI ApuM. basa, traNaso rUpiyA ApI dejo." evuM kahe che ne ? gharanuM khAya-pIve, bAIDInI gALo khAya ane ApaNA mATe kAma kare ! have to moMghavArI vadhI gaIne ? te vadhAre rUpiyA letA hazene ?! AptavANI-9 347 koInAmAM UMDA nA Utaro. kAraNa ke e to pote potAno mAlika che ne ?! enA mAlikI 'TAITala' enA potAnA che. ApaNAthI enI kema karIne TIkA karAya ? nahIM to pachI ApaNe 'TresapAsara' kahevAIe ! Ama ghoDadoDamAMthI chaTakAya ! have A badhuM cAlyA ja karavAnuM. emAM pote calAvato ja nathI. A to jarA garvarasa cAkhavAnI Teva paDelI ne ! eTale bIjAno AThasono pagAra dekhe ne, eTale manamAM ema thAya ke, "ApaNane to aDhAraso maLe che eTale ApaNane vAMdho nathI, Ane to AThaso ja maLe che !" e cAlyuM ! jANe aDhAraso upara koI UparI ja nA hoyane, evuM ! jyAM uparI hoya ne, tyAM spardhA hoya ja ! tyAM UbhA rahevAnuM kAraNa ja zuM ApaNe ? A kaMI 'resakorsamAM AvyA chIe ?! ApaNe zuM 'resakorsanA ghoDA chIe ?! enA karatAM tyAM kahI de ne, huM sAva mUrakha chuM. ame to kahI daIe chIe ne, ke 'bhaI, amArAmAM akkala nathI, amArAmAM A badhA vyavahAranI samajaNa nahIM ne !' ane e cokhkhI ja vAta karI daIe chIe ne ! ane evuM che, amane to dADhI karatAM paNa nathI AvaDatI. tyAre A bleDathI cholAI jAya che ne ! ane jene dADhI karatAM AvaDe evo mANasa paNa ame joyo nathI ! A to manamAM zuM ye 'igoIjhama" laIne pharyA kare che ! AvuM to mArA jevA ja koIka kahe ne ? bAkI, sAme to AkhI duniyA che. thoDAM ghaNAM mANasa hoya to to 'voTiMga' maLe. paNa A to 'voTiMga'mAM huM ekalo ja thauM. eTale pachI huM bUma mAruM nahIM. cUpa rahuM. kAraNa ke 'voTiMga'mAM huM ekalo ja AvuM. bAkI, AvI cetavaNI koNa Ape ? ane huM kyAM cetavaNI ApavA besuM ? eTale kevI duniyAmAM AvI phasAyA chIe. A vAto sAMbhaLavAnI tamane game che ? kaMTALo nathI Avato ? ane A vAtane cALazo nahIM, cALavA nA rahezo. ema ne ema mahIM nAkhI dejo. nahIM to jokhamadArI tamArI Avaze. A to ahIM 'pyaoNra' vastu che. ene buddhithI zuM cALavAnI ? ane A badhA hindustAnanA loka che ne, te ya potAnI samajaNe kare che. koInI pAse badhuM pUchIne zIkhyA nathI, ke "A "mazInarI'nuM A baTana dabAvavAthI zuM thAya ? peluM baTana dabAvavAthI zuM thAya ? peluM baTana dabAvavAthI zuM thAya ?" enAM 'Tekaniziyana' pAse pUchIne koI taiyAra thatuM nathI. A to badhuM ThokAThoka cAlyuM che. hindustAnanA lokone to rejhara' paNa kema calAvavuM te ya temane nathI AvaDatuM. pAnAne dhAra keTalI joIe, keTalI nahIM te ya nA jANe. Ama ghasAI gayuM eTale thaI gayuM ?! ane vakhate bahu cIkaNo hoya to paththarane ghasaghasa kare, te UlaTI dhAra hoya te ya UDI jAya. bIjA phorenavALA to kevA che ? vikalpI nahIM ne ! upara lebala lakhyuM hoya ke A blaDa kevI rIte vAparavAnI ! A 'rejhara' para naMbara kema lakhyA che eka, be, traNa, cAra, pAMca, cha, sAta ? e badhuM ja enAM "Tekaniziyana'ne pUche ane enI salAha pramANe karyA karavAnuM. ane ApaNA ahIMnA to vikalpI, doDhaDAhyA ! vahu kaheze ke, 'huM hamaNe maMdire jaIne AvuM chuM." tyAre A kaheze ke, "kaDhI karI rAkhIza.' te kare ya kharo. paNa te zAno ya vaghAra kare, te ApaNuM moDhuM bagaDI jAya ! koI ahIM reDiyo vagADatA hoya ne tame badhAM ahIMthI UThI jAva to nAnAM chokarAM mane kaheze ke, "A reDiyAne jarA pheravo ne !' tyAre huM kahI dauM ke mane nathI AvaDatuM. kAraNa ke huM to paheluM pUchuM ane pUchIne

Page #200
349 AptavANI-9 pachI zIkhuM. huM jAte ema ThokAThoka karuM nahIM. A "rejhara'mAM huM pUchuM, paNa emAM ene ja koI 'Tekaniziyana' nA maLyo hoyane ! te mane zIkhavADe ke Ama pheravavAnuM ne tema pheravavAnuM. AvaDI gayuM mane, badhuM pahoMcI gayuM mane ! tuM ye DaphoLa ne huM ye DaphoLa !! ne 'Tekaniziyana' maLyA vagara huM kone pUchuM? A to jAte kaDhI banAvIne bagADI nAkhe. A loko to gAMjo nA maLe to kaheze, 'emAM zuM karavAnuM?" te jAte vALa kApavA besI jAya evAM A loka ! alyA, Ama Ama karyuM te thaI gayuM ? evuM hota to e kArIgIrI kahevAta ja nahIM ne ! kaLA ja kahevAta nahIM ne ! A badhA loko zIkhelA hoya te kevuM ? ke ThokAThoka karIne ! A phorenavALAoe mazInarI banAvI che, te jANatA hatA ke A hindustAnanAM loka vikalpI che, bagaDI nA javuM joIe e rIte banAve che. e loko 'phekTara opha sephaTI' makI rAkhe che ! A vikalpI loko che ne ! vikalpI loka nA hotane, to "phekTara opha sephaTI'nI ATalI badhI jarUra nA paData. paNa A to zuM nuM zuM ya dabAvI de. A makAnonA kAmamAM slebo bharavAnA hoya, temAM ya 'phekaTara opha sephaTI' eTalI badhI vadhAre mUke che, nahIM to loko gharamAM gAMDI rIte bharaze ne e paDI jaze to zuM thaze ?! are, gAMDuM bhare to ya makAna pacAsa varSa sudhI cAle eTalI badhI to 'phekaTara opha sephaTI' rAkhelI hoya che. 350 AptavANI-9 eTale A badhuM vikalpI che. A badhuM jJAna ja evuM che ke koI dahADo mokSe nA javA de. tyAM thaI gayo ahaMkAra zUnya ! mane to bhASaNa karatAM ya AvaDatuM nathI. A "jJAna" che eTaluM ja AvaDe, bIjuM kazuM AvaDe nahIM A jagatamAM. ane bIjuM kazuM nA AvaDayuM tethI to A AvaDyuM ! ane kyAMya zIkhavA paNa nathI gayo. nahIM to je ne te guru thaI bese. enA karatAM AmAM 'ekasparTa to thaI jaIe, nirlepa to thaI jaIe ! mane to saMsAranI ye bAbata kazI AvaDatI nathI ane skUlamAM ya nahotuM AvaDatuM. A ekaluM AvaDatuM hatuM ke uparI nA joIe. e ja bhAMjagaDa bahu lAgI. mAthe uparI nA joIe ! pachI game te khAvApIvAnuM hoya, tenI harakata nathI. paNa mAthe uparI nA joIe. A deha che, te deha enuM 'eDajasTamenTa' laIne ja Avyo che. have A "jJAna" evuM che ne, te badhuM ja kAma kare. bAkI, amane saMsAranuM kazuM ja AvaDatuM nathI. paNa to ya pAchuM kAma sarasa cAlyA kare, badhAM ya karatAM sarasa cAlyA kare. badhAne to bUmo pADavI paDe che. mAre to bUmo ya pADavI nathI paDatI. chatAM ya badhI AvaData karatAM sAruM kAma thAya che. A jene joDA sIvatAM AvaDene, tene joDA sIvasIva karavAnAM ! kapaDAM sIvatAM AvaDe, tene e kapaDAM ja sIva sIva karavAnAM ! ne jene kaMI nA AvaDe, tene navaruM besI rahevAnuM. AvaDe nahIM, tene zuM karavAnuM che ?! kAraNa ke bhagavAne zuM kahyuM che ke jene kaMI paNa AvaDe che te jJAna ahaMkAranA AdhAre rahyuM che. jene AvaDatuM nathI tene ahaMkAra ja nathI ne ! ahaMkAra hoya to AvaDyA vagara rahe nahIMne ! mane to A ekaluM ja AvaDe che. chatAM ye lokonA manamAM bhramaNA che ke dAdA badhuM jANe ! paNa zuM jANe che te ? kazuMya jANatA nathI. 'huM to 'AtmA'nI vAta jANuM chuM, 'AtmA' jJAtA-draSTA che te jANuM chuM, 'AtmA" je je joI zake che e "huM" joI zakuM chuM paNa bIjuM AvaDatuM nathI. ahaMkAra hoya to AvaDene ! ahaMkAra bilakula je bahu cIkaNA hoya, te ema samaje ke amane 'rejhara' bahu sarasa vAparatAM AvaDe che ! te e patharI para bleDa ghasa ghasa kare. alyA, nhoya A patharI para ghasavA jevI cIja ! patharIne ne ene sATuM-sahiyAruM nathI. e vAparatAM AvaDe to bahu ajAyaba cIja che. meM eka phero kahyuM ke A bleDa mane vAparatAM nathI AvaDatI, tamane ya vAparatAM nathI AvaDatI. te ApaNe have A kone pUchavA jaIe ? tame to bleDa sTenalesa sTIlanI lAvo cho, paNa mane vAparatAM AvaDatuM nathI. temAM sTenalesa sTIla zuM kare bicAruM ? e ya DaphoLanAM hAthe paDIne DaphoLa jevuM thaI jAya !

Page #201
AptavANI-9 351 ya nirmULa thaI gayo che. jenuM mULiyuM paNa nathI rahyuM ! ke A jagyAe hato ne, te jagyAe enI koI sugaMdhI ye nA Ave. eTalA badhAM mULiyAM nIkaLI gayAM. tyAra pachI e pada kevuM majhAnuM haze ! A to amArI keTalAya avatAranI sAdhanA haze, te ekadama phaLa AvIne UbhuM rahyuM ! bAkI, A bhavamAM to kazuM AvaDyuM ja nathI. AvaData to meM koI mANasamAM joI ja nathI. A mocI che, ene ochuM AvaDatuM hoya, te joDA banAve. paNa bAra mahine khoTa ne khoTa ja lAve. tevuM A kALanA jIvo khoTa ne khoTa ja lAve. jarA AvaDatavALA hoya te naphA karatAM khoTa vadhAre lAve. cAmaDuM badhuM bagADI nAkhe. joDA sIve hau ane cAmaDuM pAMcaso joDAnuM bagADe ! temAM zuM napho rahyo ? mahenata karI ane nakAmI khoTa gaI. eTale mULa vepAramAM khoTa Ave. A saMsArI je napho Ave che, nukasAna thAya che, te to puNyanA AdhIna che. temAM A loko zuM kamAvAnA hatAM ? e to puNyanI kamANI che ! te A akkalanA iskotarA joDA ja ghasyA kare che ! eTale ApaNe to zUnya ja, kazuM AvaDatuM ja nahotuM ema mAnIne cAlone ! cheko mArIne nIce navesarathI rakama lakhavAnI. kaI 2kama ? amArI zuddhAtmAnI rakama pAkI ! nirlepa bhAva, asaMga bhAva sahita !! A to ahIM saMpUrNa rakama ApelI che. 'dAdA'e zuddhAtmA Apyo tyAre zuddhAtmA thayA. nahIM to kazuM hatuM ya nahIM, koI paisA bhAre ya sAmAna nahoto ! jagata jItAya, hArIne ! A 'jJAna' pachI tamane niraMtara zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna rahe. eTale roja sAMje ApaNe pUchavuM ke, 'caMdubhAI chIe ke zuddhAtmA ?" to kaheze ke, 'zuddhAtmA !" to Akho dahADo zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna rahyuM kahevAya. praznakartA : ApaNe AvuM kahIe tyAre loka ApaNane gAMDA kaheze. dAdAzrI : gAMDA kaheze to 'caMdubhAIne gAMDA kaheze. tamane to koI kahe ja nahIM. tamane to oLakhe ja nahIM ne ! 'caMdubhAIne kahe. to 'ApaNe' kahIe ke, 'caMdubhAI, tame hazo to kaheze ane tame nahIM ho 35ra AptavANI-9 ne kaheze to enI jokhamadArI. e pachI tamArI jokhamadArI nahIM." evuM ApaNe" kahevuM. praznakartA : ApaNane koI kazuM kahe, gAMDA kahe, akkala vagaranA kahe, to game nahIM. dAdAzrI : evuM chene, ApaNe hasavuM hoya to loTa nA phukAya ne loTa phAkavo hoya to hasAya nahIM. bemAMthI eka rAkho. ApaNe mokSe javuM che, te loka gAMDA ye kaheze ke mAre ya kharA, badhuM ya kare. paNa ApaNe ApaNuM choDI devAnuM. eTale ApaNe kahI daIe, 'bhaI, huM to hArIne beTho chuM.' amArI pAse eka bhAI AvelA. meM emane kahyuM ke, "hArIne tamAre javuM paDaze. enAM karatAM huM hArIne beTho chuM. tuM tAre khaIne nirAMte oDhIne sUI jA ne ! tAre joItuM hatuM, te tane maLI gayuM. 'dAdA'ne harAvavAnI icchA che ne ? te huM pote kabUla karuM chuM ke ame hArI gayA." eTale Amane kyAM pahoMcI vaLAya ? A to badhI magajamArI kahevAya. A dehane mAra paDe e sAro, paNa A to magajane mAra paDe. e to bahu upAdhi ! jagatanI mIThAza joIe che ane A ye joIe che, be nA thAya. jagatamAM to harAvavA Avene, to hArIne besavuM nirAMte. loka to enI bhASAmAM javAba Apaze. 'moTA zuddhAtmA thaI gayA cho ?' evI tevI gALo hau bhAMDaze. kAraNa ke lokano svabhAva evo che. potAne mokSe javAno mArga maLyo nathI eTale bIjAne ya javA nA de, evo lokano svabhAva. A jagata mokSe javA de evuM che ja nahIM. mATe Amane samajAvI-paTAvIne chevaTe hArI jaIne ya kahevuM ke, "ame to hArI gayelA chIe.' to tamane choDI deze. A loka to koIne ya gAMThatA nahotA ne ! mATe ApaNe samajI javuM ke e harAvatA AvyA che, tyAMthI ja kahevuM ke 'bhaI, huM to hArIne beTho chuM. tame jItyA, huM to tamArAthI hArI gayo." evuM kahIe eTale ene UMgha Ave, ke meM caMdubhAIne harAvyA. eTale e saMtoSa mAne !

Page #202
AptavANI-9 353 nahIM to pragati rUMdhAya ! ame amAro 'progresa' choDIe nahIM. ame eka vakhata vinaMtI karI joIe. bAkI, ame to vAta choDI daIne AgaLa cAlavA mAMDIe. ame kyAM sudhI besI rahIe ?! ame tamane samaja pADIe. paNa jo tame tamArI pakaDa pakaDo to ame tarata choDI daIe. ame jANIe ke Amane dekhAtuM nathI, to ApaNe kyAM sudhI besI rahIe ? besI nA rahevuM joIene ? ApaNe ApaNI cAlatI pakaDavI joIene ? kAraNa ke ene AgaLa dekhAtuM ja nathI ne ! ahIMthI traNaso phUTa cheTe eka sapheda ghoDo laIne koI mANasa Ubho hoya ane ApaNe koIkane pUchIe ke bhaI, peluM zuM UbhuM che ? tyAre e kaheze ke, "gAya UbhI che.' to ApaNe pelAne mAravo joIe ? zAthI nA mAravo ja joIe ? A pelA ghoDAne e gAya kahe che ne ? mATe ene mAravo ja joIene ? nA ! enI evI 'loMga sAITa' nA hoya, emAM eno bicArAno zo doSa ? e to sAruM che ne, ke gadheDo nathI kaheto ! nahIM to e gadheDo kahe to ya ApaNe 'eksepTa' karavuM paDe. ene jevuM dekhAyuM tevuM e kahe che. evuM che A jagata ! sahu sahune, jene jevuM dekhAyuM evuM e bole che. A ghoDAnA draSTAMta parathI vAtane tame samajI gayA ne ? jevuM dekhAya evuM ja bolene, loka ? emAM eno doSa kharo ? ApaNe samajI levuM ke ene bicArAne dekhAya che ja AvuM, mATe A AvuM bole che. to ApaNe kahIe ke hA bhaI, tArI draSTithI A barobara che. tyAM ApaNe ema paNa nA kahevuM joIe ke nA, amArI draSTithI amAruM barAbara che. eTaluM ja kahevAya ke tArI draSTithI barAbara che. nahIM to pAcho kaheze ke, 'UbhA raho, UbhA raho. tamArI draSTithI zuM che e mane kaho." ema pAcho UlaTo besADI rAkhe. enAM karatAM tArI draSTithI barobara che, kahIne ApaNe heMDavA ja mAMDavAnuM ! ame Ama dekhAIe bhoLA, paNa bahu pAkA hoIe. bALaka jevA 354 AptavANI-9 dekhAIe, paNa pAkA hoIe. koInI joDe ame besI nA rahIe, cAlavA ja mAMDIe. ame amAro 'progresa' kyAM choDIe ? 'jJAnI puruSa' pAse hitanI vAta hoya. emanI pAse be zabda samajI le ne, to bahu thaI gayuM ! be zabda samajavAmAM Ave, ne emAMthI eka ja zabda jo kadI hRdayamAM pahoMcI ne pacI jAya to e zabda mokSa laI jatAM sudhI ene choDe nahIM. eTaluM vacanabaLavALuM hoya, eTalI vacanasiddhi hoya e zabdanI pAchaLa ! chUTavA mATe gajabanI zodhakhoLa ! A tethI ApaNe kahyuM ne, ke bhaI, A tamArA badhAnuM sAcuM. paNa amAruM A spardhAvALuM nathI. A ajoDa vastu che. tAre halakuM kahevuM hoya to halakuM kahe, bhAre kahevuM hoya to bhAre kahe. paNa A che ajoDa ! AnI spardhAmAM koI nathI. ame koInI spardhAmAM nathI. amane koI pUche ke, 'bhaI, A phalANA lokonuM kevuM che ?' to ame tarata ema kahIe ke, amane enAM tarapha kaMI rAga-dveSa nathI. je che evuM kahI daIe. amAre spardhA nathI. levAdevA ja nathI ne ! ne A spardhAmAM amAre naMbara lAvavo nathI. mAre zuM karavAno naMbarane ? mAre to kAma sAthe kAma che. amArI pAse ya ADuM bolanArA Ave tyAre huM kahuM ke, 'A to ame AvuM jANatA ja nahotA. tame kahyuM tyAre ame jANyuM. ane tame to badhuM jANIne beThelA cho.' ema kahIne ene pAcho kADhIe, hA, nahIM to ene harAvIe to ene UMgha nA Ave ane ApaNane doSa coMTe. to enA karatAM sUI jA ne ! 'tuM amArAthI jItyo. mATe ghera jaIne rezamI cAdara pAtharIne tuM sUI jA.' ame evuM kahIe chIe ghaNA lokone. enA manamAM ema ke lAva ne, thoDuMka jItIe. eTale ApaNe kahIe ke tuM jItyo, le ! ene jo harAvIe ne, to ene UMgha nA Ave. ane mane to hArIne ya UMgha AvavAnI che. jema hAruM chuM ema vadhAre UMgha Ave che. hAravAnuM zodhI kADho ! A navI zodhakhoLa che ApaNI. e jItelo

Page #203
AptavANI-9 355 mANasa koIka dahADo ya hAre. paNa je hArIne beThA ne, te koI dahADo yu hAre nahIM. jItavA nIkaLyo, tyAMthI ja nApAsa kahevAmAM Ave che. A laDhAIo nathI. zAstramAM jItavA nIkaLyo ke game temAM jItavA nIkaLyo, paNa jItavA nIkaLyo mATe tuM nApAsa ! A jJAna binaharIpha jJAna che. harIphavALuM A jJAna hoya. tethI to durlabha, durlabha, durlabha kahyuM ne ! 'jJAnI puruSa' maLavA durlabha che ! ekamAM "esparTa', paNa badhe... ane ame to "abudha' chIe evuM pustakamAM chApyuM hau che. huM lokone kahuM chuM ke ame to abudha chIe ! eTale loko kahe che, "evuM nA bolo, nA bolo !" alyA bhaI, tuM ya bola. tuM ya abudha thA, nahIM to mAryo jaIza ! ne A loka to tArAM TAMTiyA bhAMgI nAkhaze ! eTale ApaNe akkalavALA thavAnI vAta ja nahIM karavAnI. tethI to ame abudhanuM kArakhAnuM khoLI kADhyuM ne ! juo ne, kevuM khoLI kADhyuM ! ane A vyavahAramAM jyAre ApaNane samajaNa nA paDe to vakIlane khoLI kADhIzuM ke, 'le rUpiyA, ne kaMIka karI Apa. A bAjhI paDyo che te ukela lAvI Apa." kahIe. vaLI ApaNe kyAM akkala vApara vApara karIe ! A akkalavALA loka to maLe che ne ! koI paccIsa rUpiyAnA maLe, koI pacAsa rUpiyAnA maLe, koI so rUpiyAnA maLe. chevaTe eka dahADAnA pAMcaso rUpiyAnA ya maLe che ne ! taiyAra ja maLe che, te have akkala zA sAruM vAparavAnI ?! tamane samajAyuM ne ? ne A to bahu puNyazALI mANasa, te loka 'akkala nathI' evuM kahe che. e bahu sAruM che. A to InAma kahevAya. A to lokoe ja vadhAre kAdavamAM utaravA ja nA dIdho. 'e ya Ubho rahe, mahIM nA UtarIza, tuM DUbI jaIza, kAdavamAM paga khUMpI jaze !" tyAre kahIe, 'sAruM !' A kinAre UbhA rahyA, tethI to A "jJAna" pAmyA ! nahIM to A khUMpI gayA hoya ne, temanAM moDhAM to juo, badhAMnA ! kevAM dIvela pIdhA jevA thaI gayAM che, DAhyA thavA hAru, nAma kADhavA hAru gayelA te ! 356 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : paNa bahAravALA badhI bAbatamAM mUrakha TharAvI de, tyAM zuM karavuM? dAdAzrI : hA, te ApaNe e thavAnI ja jarUra che. ApaNI bahu jAgI che ! ane tyAM AgaLa e lokomAM ApaNe ekadama hasIkhuzIne nA rahevuM. paNa dekhAva to evo rAkhavo ke amAre tamArI joDe ghoDadoDamAM AvavuM che, dekhAvamAM ja phakta ! paNa aMdarakhAne to, tyAM gayA hoya ne, to hArI javuM pAchAM ! eTale emanAM manamAM 'ame jItyA che' evuM lAge. ame to AvuM sAme cAlIne keTalAMyane kahI dIdhuM ke, 'bhaI, amArAmAM barakata nathI.' e sArAmAM sAro rasto. bAkI, e badhI ghoDadoDo che ! "resakorsa' che !! temAM konI joDe ApaNe doDIe ? nathI ApaNamAM kazI barakata, nathI cAlavAnI zakti, emAM konI joDe doDIe ? to ya loka kaheze, 'tamArI uMmara hajI kyAM vadhAre che ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, 'paNa vadhAre uMmaravALAnI joDe ya mArAthI na doDAya. A amane bIjuM kazuM to AvaDe nahIM." A babUcakanI akkalane zuM karavAnI ? je akkala to bhADe maLe che ne ! juone, 'ekasparTa' to, jyAMthI joIe tyAMthI bhADe AvI jAya. zenA 'ekasparTa' ? tyAre kahe, "inkamaTekSa'nA. e ya bhADe, bIjo bhADe, trIjo bhADe, DaoNkTara bhADe, vakIlo bhADe, badhuM ya bhADe ! ane game te mANasa, sahu sahunI lAInamAM hoMziyAra hoya ne bIjI lAInamAM badhAM babUcaka che. tenA karatAM ApaNe sAruM, eka lAInamAM moTA 'esparTa kahevaDAvA karatAM sabameM babucaka ! heya.... moTAM dAdAcAMdajI hoya, paNa amuka bAbata Ave tyAre kahe, 'Ane mATe to pelAne tyAM javuM paDe.' amArI pAse makAno baMdhAvavA Ave che te Ama moTA DaoNkaTara hoya, paNa e bicArA vinaya karyA kare. kAraNa ke ene A bAjunuM khabara ja nA hoya ne ! evuM che A jagata. bIjI bAju babUcaka ja hoya ! sabamAM to koI taiyAra thAya nahIM ne ! eTale game tyAM to babUcaka kahevAIzane ? tenAM karatAM sabameM babucaka ho jAva ne ! tamane nA samajaNa paDI ? eka suMThanAM gAMgaDA hAru gAMdhI kahevaDAvavuM, enAM karatAM 'ame gAMdhI ja nathI, gAMdhI to tame.' amArI zodhakhoLa sArI che ne ?

Page #204
AptavANI-9 357 eka mANasane pUchayuM ke, 'tamAre have dhaNI marI gayA, te kArakhAnuM zI rIte calAvazo ?" to mane kahe che, 'e to menejara rAkhI laIzuM.' tyAre alyA, evuM bhADe maLe che A badhuM ?! to dhaNI marI gayo to raDe che zuM kAma ? jo badhuM bhADe maLatuM hoya, akkale ya bhADe maLe ne badhuM bhADe maLe, to e bhADe laI Avone ! ane 'A' te kaMI bhADe ochuM rAkhavAnuM che ? A to asala dhana che ! bhADe loka maLe che ke nathI maLatA ? dAdAcAMdajI bhADe maLe ke nA maLe ? ene pAMca hajAra rUpiyA maLatA hoya to kahIe, dasa hajAra ApIza. to tarata dAdAcAMdajI Avene ! bhADethI maLe. ane "ApaNe" to bhADe nahIM javAnuM koIne tyAM, ne ApaNuM bhADuM koI levAnuM che ? ApaNuM bhADuM ApI zake ya nahIMne ! amUlyanuM bhADuM zI rIte ApI zake ? e barobara sahelo rasto chene ? ane AmAM zAnI akkala rAkhavAnI ? te tyArathI ja ame vAta choDI dIdhelI, lagAma ja choDI dIdhelIne ! ane kahI dIdheluM, 'amane samajaNa nA paDe.' eTale ApaNe chUTA ! ane huM to eme ya kahuM chuM, 'have amArAmAM kaMI barakata rahI nathI, tame khoLavA jAo to !' tyAre e loko kaheze, "nA, bolazo." have ApaNA hAthamAM pataMga AvI gaI. lokonI pataMgo gulAMTa khAvAnI haze to khAze, paNa ApaNI pataMgano dora to hAthamAM AvI gayo ! ApaNe A lokonI ghoDadoDamAM kyAM paDIe ?! 'saba sabakI samAlo, meM merI phoDatA huM.' ane A akkalane zuM karavuM ? tame jo AmAM UMDA UtaryA hotane, to keTalA badhA UMDe garakI gayA hota. paNa te tame amArI peTha cheTe ne cheTe rahyA, te sAruM thayuM ! amane to A loka sAmA cAlIne kahe ke, 'tame to Ama bahu jAtajAtanuM sAruM dekhADo cho.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'nA." chevaTe eme ya kahI dauM ke, 'huM badhuM bhUlI gayo chuM, have to bhAna ja nathI rahetuM.' 'amArAmAM to koI barakata rahI nathI have', kahIe chIe e lokone bahu game che. nahIM to A barakatavALA loko to ahIM sodo karavA 358 AptavANI-9 Ave. alyA, ahIM sodA karavAnI cIja che ? sabase upara chIe ! sodA kara tArI lAyakAta para ! ame to uparInA uparI chIe ane pAchAM barakata vagaranA chIe !! eTale kahI daIe, 'barakata vagaranAmAM zuM khoLo cho ?" cora-bahAravaTiyA maLe ne, to ye kahI daIe, 'amArI pAse, barakata vagaranA pAse zuM levAnuM che ? tAre je joItuM hoya te laI le gajavAmAMthI ! amane ApatAM nahIM AvaDe. ame barakata vagaranA chIe." loko to nAnapaNamAM vaDhatAM ke 'tArAmAM kazI barakata nathI.' tyAre have ApaNe ja kahI daIe ne, vaLI koIka kahe tenA karatAM ! koIkane vakhate kahevuM paDe, koI 'sarTiphikeTa' Ape, enAM karatAM ApaNe ja 'sarTiphAIDa kopI' thaI jaIene, to bhAMjagaDa ja maTI jAyane ! lokone kahevuM paDe ke, 'tArAmAM barakata nathI, tArAmAM barakata kazI nathI ! ane ApaNe e barakata lAvavA pharIe, Ano sodo kyAre jaDe ? enA karatAM ApaNe ja "sarTiphAIDa' barakata vagaranA thaI jaIene ! to ukela Ave ne ! 'resakorsa'nA saravaiye ! amAre kaMpanImAM pahelo naMbara AvavA mAMDyone, tyAre manamAM pAvara peTho ke A to bhejuM bahu sarasa kAma kare che. paNa te, e ya akkala nahotI, kamaakkalapaNuM hatuM, upAdhi lAvavAnuM saMgrahasthAna hatuM. upAdhi ghaTADe, enuM nAma akkala kahevAya ! hA, AvatI upAdhi ApaNI pAse Ave nahIM, vacce bIjo koI moDa paherI le ! te upAdhi enI pAse jAya. A lokonI to rIta ja khoTI che, rasama ja AkhI khoTI che ! te A lokonI rIta ne rasama pramANe ApaNe doDIne pahelo naMbara lAvyA pachI ye pAcho chello naMbara Avyo, te huM pachI samajI gayo ke A dago che ! huM to emAM ye doDelo, khUba doDelo, paNa emAM pahelo naMbara AvyA pachI chello naMbara Avelo. tyAre thayuM ke 'A cakkara kaI jAtanuM ? A to phasAmaNa che !' AmAM to koI naMgoDa mANasa game tyAre ApaNane dhULadhANI karI nAkhe. evuM karI nAkhe ke nA karI nAkhe ? pahelo naMbara AvyA pachI bIje dahADe ja hAMpha hAMpha karI nAkhe ! eTale ame samajI

Page #205
AptavANI-9 359 gayA ke AmAM pahelo naMbara AvyA pachI chello naMbara Ave che, eTale ghoDadoDamAM UtaravuM nahIM. ame to nirAMtamAM ne nirAMtamAM rahelA. pahelAM to rastA Ama vAMkAcUMkAne, te mahIM gaNatarI thAya ke A rasto Ama vaLI ane pAcho peNe jAya che ! te AkhuM kuMDALuM hoya to ekanAM traNa gaNA thAya, to A aDadhuM kuMDALuM doDha gaNuM thAya. te doDho rasto cAlavAne badale sIdhuM ja cAlelo. lokonA raste cAlelo ja nahIM pahelethI, mAre lokarasto ja nahIM. lokaraste dhaMdho ke nahIM. judo ja dhaMdho ! rIte ya judI ne rasama ya judI. loko karatAM badhuM ja juduM. ane ghera koI dahADo raMga dhoLAvAno nahIM. enI meLe bhIMtone dhoLAvAnuM hoya to dhoLAI jAya ! eTale ame to A eka ja zabda kahIe ke, "amArAmAM barakata nathI rahI have.' barakata to ame joI lIdhI ! bahu doDyA, khUba doDayA ! e to saravaiyuM kADhIne A anubhavathI kahuM chuM. anaMta avatArathI doDyo, te badhuM nakAmuM gayuM. 'Topa" upara bese evuM doDyo chuM, paNa badhe mAra khAdho che. enAM karatAM bhAgone, ahIMthI ! ApaNI asala jagyA khoLI kADho, heya...jAyanTika !! eTale uparathI deva AvIne kahe, 'tamane A ghoDadoDamAM pahelo naMbara ApIe chIe.' toye kahIe, "nA, A dAdA e jagyAe jaI AvyA che, te jagyAnI vAta e kahe che, ne te amane sAruM lAgyuM. amAre ghoDadoDa joItI ja nathI.' amArA saMbaMdhI sAthe paisA saMbaMdhI vAta nIkaLIne, tyAre mane kahe che, 'tame to bahu sAruM kamAyA cho." kahyuM, 'mAre to evuM kazuM che ja nahIM. ane kamANImAM to, tame kamAyelA cho. heya... milo rAkhI ne e badhuM rAkhyuM. jyAM tame ne kyAM huM !? tamane nahIM jANe zuM AvaDyuM, te ATaluM badhuM nANuM bheguM thayuM. mane A bAbatamAM nA AvaDyuM. mane to pelI bAbatamAM ja AvaDyuM." AvuM kahyuM eTale ApaNane ane ene sATuMsahiyAruM ja nA rahyuMne ! 'resakorsa ja nA rahyo ne ! hA, kaMI levA-devA ja nahIM. kyAM emanI joDe spardhAmAM utaravAnuM hatuM ? 360 AptavANI-9 haMmezAM ya loka AvI spardhAmAM hoya, paNa huM emanI joDe kyAM doDuM ? emane InAma levA done ! ApaNe joyA karo. have harIphAImAM doDe to zI dazA thAya ? ghUMTaNiyA badhuM cholAI jAya. eTale ApaNe to kAma ja nahIM. InAma "pahelA'te, hAMphavAtuM badhAne ! te amAre oLakhANavALAne tyAM lagnamAM javAnuM thAya, te mane ahIM vacce besADayo hoya, to koI jayacaMda AvyA to kaheze, jarA khaso, phalANA AvyA to khaso, koI DaoNkaTara AvyA ke khaso, mohanabhAI AvyA ke khaso. Ama khasI khasIne tela nIkaLI jAya. te khasIne navame naMbare jauM eTale pachI huM besato ja nahoto ! meM kahyuM, 'ApaNane A poSAya nahIM, ApaNe A resakorsamAM UtaravuM nathI. pahelA ghoDAne ja InAma Ape che, bIjAne ApatA ja nathI pAchA." to pachI e mane kahe che, 'tame kAkA thAva, to laganamAM tamane vacce besADIe chIe, to kema besatA nathI ne te ghaDIe AghA-pAchA thaI jAva cho ne tame cheTe UbhA raho cho ke game tyAM besI raho cho ? amane amArA vyavahAramAM khoTuM dekhAya ne !' kahyuM, "nA, kazuM khoTuM nA dekhAya. loko samajI gayA che. mane, ke A bhakta che ane amane AmAM samajaNa paDe nahIM'. to ya kahe, nA, paNa amAruM khoTuM dekhAya.' tyAre meM emane samajaNa pADI. meM kahyuM, 'bhAI, huM koI dahADo boluM nahIM. paNa A pUcho cho to sAcuM ja bolI dauM chuM. jo huM tyAM vacce besuM to tyAra pachI jhavera lakSmIcaMdavALA AvyA, te mATe khasavuM paDe. pachI A maganabhAI zaMkarabhAI AvyA ke mAre khasavuM paDe. eTale mAre A jagyAo pheravavI paDe. ane evAM apamAna khamavA enAM karatAM A mAre mAnabhera zuM khoTuM che ? huM harIphAImAM paDato nathI, A 'resakorsamAM paDato nathI." eTale meM kahyuM, mane vacce besADIne mAro navamo naMbara Ave evuM nAka kapAvIe enA karatAM ApaNe cheTe ja sArA." paNa evuM moMDhe meM nA kahyuM. paNa A saravaiyuM kADhIne huM chaTakI gayelo ke A resakorsamAM pahelAM ghoDAne InAma maLaze. bIjA badhAne to inAma nahIM maLavAnuM ne ! te ghoDadoDa mane pasaMda nathI. je pahelo Ave tene inAma ane bIjo Ave te eTaluM hAMphe paNa tene

Page #206
AptavANI-9 361 inAma kazuM ye nahIM. tyAre kahe, 'bahu luccAI gaNAya tamArI.' kahyuM, 'e je gaNo te che. A amArI kaLA che ! ne tame ene luccAI kaho ke je kaho e kharuM.' tyAre kahe, "A to chaTakI nAsavAnI kharI kaLA, luccAI khoLI kADhI !' paNa A amArI kaLA che ! jamIe, karIe, AIsakrIma khaIe, badhuM karIe. huM to kayo ghoDo pahelo Ave che e sigareTa pIto pIto joyA karuM chuM. hA, ApaNe sigareTa pIvI ane joyuM ke pelo ghoDo pahelo Avyo. ApaNe emAM doDavuM nahIM. ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM. A ghoDA joDe kyAM doDIe ? to ya ame eka phero nALa ghAlavA gayA hatA, te pagamAM kaNIo hajI paDI rahI che ! to "parsanAliTI' paDe jyAM juo tyAM 'resakorsa'. kAraNa ke A loka badhA 'resakorsa'mAM UtarelA che. ghera 'vAIpha' joDe ya 'resakorsa' utpanna thayeluM hoya ! be baLada joDe cAlatA hoya ne eka jarA AgaLa thavA jAyane, to bIjo joDavALA hoya ne, e ya jora kare pachI. praznakartA : evuM zAthI ? dAdAzrI : 'resakorsa'mAM UtaryA hoya tethI. A joDevALo AgaLa jato hoya to Ane irSA Ave ke kema karIne pelo pAchaLa paDe. A ghoDadoDamAM koIno naMbara lAgelo nahIM. huM e ghoDadoDamAM Utarato nathI. A ghoDadoDamAM to hAMphI hAMphIne marI jAya to ye koIne naMbara lAgelo nahIM. te Ama hoya akkalano iskotaro ! ane chevaTe hAMphIne marI jAya tyAre 'pelo mane chetarI gayo ne pelo mane chetarI gayo' kaheze. eMsI varSe ya tane chetarI gayo ! anaMta avatAra A 'resakorsamAM doDa doDa karIza to ya chelle dahADe tuM chetarAIza, evuM A jagata che. badhuM nakAmuM jaze. uparathI pAra vagarano mAra khAvAno. enAM karatAM bhAgo ahIMthI, ApaNI asala jagyA khoLI kADho, je ApaNuM mULa svarUpa che. A jagatane koI jItI zakelo ja nahIM. tethI amArI bahu UMDI 362 AptavANI-9 zodhakhoLa che ke je A jagatane jItADe. 'ame to hArIne beThA chIe, tAre jItavuM hoya to Ava' kahIe. A amArI zodhakhoLa bahu UMDI che. 'varlDa" AkhuM ajAyaba pAme evI zodhakhoLa che, ne ame jItyA A jagatane ! bAkI, A jagatane koI jItelo ja nahIM. amArI evI eka eka zodhakhoLa che ke je jItADe, evI zodhakhoLa che. hAM, eka eka zodhakhoLa ! A "akrama vijJAna' che ! vijJAna ja AkhuM akrama che. kramamAM to AvuM hoya nahIM ne ! kramikamAM to evuM nA bolAya ke mArAmAM barakata nathI. A "akrama vijJAna che. tame 'resakorsa'mAMthI khasyA ke tarata 'parsanAliTI' paDaze. 'resakorsa'mAM 'parsanAliTI' nA paDe, koInI ja nA paDe ! jItADIne javA do ! anaMta avatAra AnuM A ja karyuM che. bIjuM zuM karyuM che te ? bIjo dhaMdho zuM karyo che ? paNa have A "jJAna" che to phare. nahIM to phare nahIM ne ! A "jJAna" che te potAno doSa dekhADI zake ApaNane ! ane ApaNane mAnyAmAM ya Ave ke nA, kharekhara ApaNo ja doSa che. peluM to koIkane pUchavA javuM paDe, tyAre e to zuM moTo barakatavALo hoya, te ApaNuM kahI Ape ? ApaNane potAne ja lAgavuM joIe ke ApaNo doSa che A. eTale jItavAnI kaMI jarUra nathI. ame kAyamane mATe e rAkheluM. jItavAno to koI dahADo 'prinsipala' rAkhelo ja nahIM. ene jItADIne mokalI dauM, ane huM e bhUlI ja jauM ane e ya bIjA dhaMdhAmAM paDI jAya. ane jo huM harAvIne mokaluM, te pachI tAMte caDhe. tAMte caDhyo. pachI e choDe ja nahIM. mATe pahelethI ja ApaNe jItADIne mokalI devA. praznakartA : ke huM hAryo ne tuM jItyo, bhAI. dAdAzrI : evuM moDhe nahIM kahevAnuM. nahIM to enA manamAM ema thAya ke "ohoho ! TADhA paDI gayA. barobara che !' praznakartA: moDhe kahIe to zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : moDhe kahIe tyAre to pAcho taMte caDhe ke, "evuM amAre jItavuM nathI.' mane eka jaNe kaheluM haune ! meM evuM kaheluM ke, "bhaI, to

Page #207
AptavANI-9 363 hArIne beThelo chuM. tame jItyA have. nirAMte ghera jaIne sUI jAva, ArAmathI.' tyAre e kahe, 'evuM mAre joItuM nathI.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'savAda nahIM kADho.' eTale taMte caDhe ! Ama bolIe to Ama ne Ama bolIe to Ama ! vAMdhA-vacakAvALuM jagata ! ene to vAMdho-vacako nAkhavo ja che ane ApaNe to A vAMdhA-vacakA UThAvI laIe, UlaTAM hoya te. have 'dAdA'nAM jJAnane to ApaNe dIpAvavAno prayatna karavAno che. paNa chatAM ya nA dIkhuM, to rahyuM. eno kaMI tAMto ocho pakaDavAno che ? ApaNA prayatno 'pojhiTiva' hovAM joIe. saMjogo 'negeTiva' kare, tene ApaNe zuM karavAnA hatA ? evI pakaDa pakaDAtI haze ? paNa nA, A to tAMtA ja hoya che ke harAvavA ja ! hAra-jItanA khela ! ame to koIne harAvavuM e bhayaMkara jokhama mAnIe chIe. pachI pelo taiyArI kare ApaNane harAvavAnI, enA karatAM ene jItADIne mokalI do ! to bhAMjagaDa nahIM. sAmAne jItADIne mokalI daIe. pachI che kazI bhAMjagaDa ? ApaNA taraphanI vAta ja nA rahene ! pachI e bIjo vepA2 cAlu karI de. ene harAvIe to ApaNA taraphanI badhI bhAMjagaDa UbhI ne ? jItADIne mokalIe to bIjo vepAra cAlu karI de e ! eTale A 'akrama vijJAna' bahu sAruM chene ! A 'dAdA'nA kahyA pramANe cAlene, to A badhI bharahADathI chUTA thaI javAya, mahIM nATakIya rahIe ApaNe, ne A loko joDenA vyavahArano ukela Ave. vyavahAra badho ukelIe nahIM, to lAla vAvaTo dhare. A to koI lAla vAvaTo dhare ja nahIM ne ! A rasto ja kliyara rasto che, A 'vijJAna' ja judI jAtanuM che. ApaNe koInI pAse kazuM levAnuM kaMI kapaTa nathI, e nirvivAda vAta che. ane koInI joDe ApaNane 'A ApaNuM ne A parabhAryuM' evuM kazuM che nahIM, e paNa nirvivAda vAta che. eTale ApaNe pachI zI bhAMjagaDa ? korsa, 'akrama vijJAta'to ! ne ahIM A to 'akrama vijJAna' che, judI jAtanuM, ora ja jAtanuM vijJAna che. kevuM lAbhakArI chene ? 364 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : koI zIkhe ne kare to ? dAdAzrI : hA, amAro zabda jo zIkhyo ne enA pramANe cAlyo to to kAma ja thaI gayuM. 'jJAnI puruSa'no eka akSara ja jo samajamAM Avyo to kalyANa ja thaI jAya !! bAkI, tharDamAMthI phorthamAM kyAre jaIe ? enAM karatAM A 'dAdA' meTrikanI bahAra 'pharsTa iyara'mAM besADI de ! pelA loko to 'phIphatha'mAM, 'sIkastha'mAM che; ne ApaNe jAte to tharDamAMthI pAsa thavAnuM nathI. enAM karatAM 'dAdA' kahe che te pramANe heMDo ne, eTale ukela AvI gayo. nahIM to A loko to karma baMdhAvaDAvavA Ave ke, 'tame Ama karI Apo, tema karI Apo.' amArI pAse to have cakaluM ja pharakatuM nathI ne ! AvatuM ya nathI ne jatuM ya nathI ! ADozI ya nA Ave ne pADozI ya nA Ave !!! ane koI 'kharAba che' evuM ya kahe nahIM, 'bahu sArA mANasa che' evuM kaheze. eTale rasto amAro bahu sarasa, kImiyAgIrI rasto ne 'sepha sAIDa'vALo. nahIM to A tharDamAMthI phorthamAM javuM muzkela che. jo A lokonI lAInamAM emanAM pramANe cAlavA gayA ne, to 'tharDa'mAMthI 'phortha'mAM javuM bahu agharuM che. ane A kALamAM evI 'kepesiTI' ya nA hoya. enA karatAM ApaNe 'pharsTa iyara' ina koleja, grejyueTanI mahIM, dAdAI kolejamAM have besI gayA chIe. te vaDAM ne badhuM khAvAnuM nirAMte. loka bhoktA nahIM ne ApaNe bhoktA ! Amane to bhogavavAnuM hoya ja nahIM ne ! doDa doDa ja karavAnuM ! InAma lAvavAnuM che ne ?! A 'eDamizana' levA jAya ne laI le eTaluM ja nathI ane 'emizana' laIne pachI nA AvIe eTaluM paNa nathI A. A to pUruM karI levA jevuM che. A eka 'korsa' Akho pUro karI levA jevo che. anaMta avatAramAM A 'korsa' pUro karyo nathI, ne jo karyo hota to nirbhayatA ! enI to vAta ja judI che ne ! //////////

Page #208
[9] kheMca : kapaTa : poInTamena akrama vijJAta, ukele gUMco sarve ! A vAta badhI 'ekaspiriyansa'vALI, anubhavavALI ja batAvuM chuM. jo jAte nA karyuM hoyane, to mArA jJAnathI dekhAyelA upAyo che. ukela to mANasane joIe ne ! nahIM to ukela vagara mANasa gUMcAyA kare. lokone ukela nathI jaDato tethI to gUMcAyA kare che, badhAya gUMcAyA kare che. eTale gUMca Ave tyAre zuM kare ? ane A jagata to gUMcanuM ja kArakhAnuM che ! 'dhI varlDa Ijha dhI pajhala ITaselpha.' eTale 'ITaselpha pajhala' thayuM che A ! tethI ja huM kahuM chuM ne, ke A 'akrama vijJAna' che ! taiyAra thayA vagaranAMne vijJAna ApeluM che, eTale enI 'bAunDrI'mAM AvyA sivAyanAMne ! paNa e ya puNya haze tyAre ja prApti thAyane ? eTalA mATe ame kahyuM che ke vyavahAramAM, tyAM AgaLa evI rIte kArya karAvo ke sAmA koIne du:kha na thAya ane evuM valaNa hovuM joIe ApaNuM. jIvata, kheMca vagaranuM ! praznakartA : dAdAnuM 'jJAna' maLyA pachI sAdhAraNa rIte jIvana kevuM hovuM joIe ? 366 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : kheMca vagaranuM jIvana jIvavuM joIe. praznakartA : kheMcAtuM kevI rIte haze ? dAdAzrI : tame mArI joDe vAta karatA ho to huM eno tamane javAba ApuM. ane te tamArI vAta kharI karAvavA mATe tame pharI vAta karo, e kheMca kahevAya. evI vAre ghaDIe kheMca rAkhe. jo 'jJAna' lIdhuM hoya to kheMca ja nA hoyane ! ane kheMca hoya to kADhI nAkhavI. kAraNa ke e bhUla che. ane kADhI nAkhIe to ya nA nIkaLe to vAMdho nahIM. kheMca hoya to kheMcane paNa 'tamAre' jovI, to 'tame' chUTyA ! kheMcane paNa tame juo to chUTyA. tame ApaNA kAyadAmAM cho ! A kheMca e judI vastu che. kheMca eTale, huM kahuM ke, bhaI, nA, Ama che.' eTale pachI enuM potAnuM satya karAvavA mATe vAre ghaDIe kharuM kara kara karavuM, e kheMca kahevAya. ane kheMcavALA pAse, kheMca jyAM hoya tyAM satya koI prakAranuM hotuM nathI. kheMca e ja moTAmAM moTuM dUSaNa che. eTale A kheMca nathI eTale zuM ke tame kaho ke 'nathI gamatuM' tyAre e kaheze, 'baMdha rAkhIe, lo !' bIjI bhAMjagaDa nahIMne ! praznakartA : potAnuM kharuM karavA e mANasa khUba dalIlo upara caDhe ane potAnuM kharuM karavA prayatna kare, tyAre samajavuM ke 'bejha' khoTuM che. dAdAzrI : paNa te ya, dalIlo ya potAnI jAgRtipUrvaka nathI karAtI. ajAgRti hoya tyAre ja dalIla karene ! mANasa ajAgRta hoya tyAre dalIla kare. jAgRtivALA dalIla karatA haze ? praznakartA : dalIla karavI e khoTuM che ke sAruM che ? dAdAzrI : e saMsAramAM sAruM che. saMsAramAM jo tamAre kaMIka karavuM hoya to sAruM che, paNa mokSe javuM hoya to khoTuM che. saMsAramAM jo tame dalIla nA karo to tamAruM loka laI jaze. ane ahIM satsaMgamAM dalIla vastu ja khoTI che. 'jJAnI puruSa' kahyuM emAM bolavAnuM nA hoya. A satsaMganI bAbata hoya, emAM bolavAnuM na hoya. vyavahAramAM bolavAnuM hoya. vyavahAramAM tamAre ema kahevuM ke, "dAdAjI, A gADImAM nA jazo,

Page #209
AptavANI-9 367 AmAM jAva." paNa A satsaMgamAM ?! zuM DAhyA, doDha DAhyA !! 'ovaravAIjha' kahevuM paDe amAre ! A to 'sAyanTiphika' vijJAna che. keTalAka to mane kahe che, "kAyadA karo, Ama karo, tema karo." alyA, kaI jAtanA mANasa cho, te tamane AvuM vijJAna maLyuM toya tame DAhyA nA thayA ? kevuM vijJAna ! saheje ya athaDAmaNa nA thAya evuM. praznakartA: kAyadAo karIne ja atyAra sudhI lokone DAhyA karavAno rasto hato. dAdAzrI : hA, lokone mATe barobara che. paNa ApaNe to mokSamArge javuM che. lokone to saMsAramAM bhaTakavuM che, emane kAyado joIe. bAkI, kAyadAthI to athaDAmaNa thAya ne athaDAmaNathI pAcho saMsAra Ubho thAya. praznakartA: mokSamArge javAmAM ya kAyadA batAvyA che ? dAdAzrI : mokSamArge javAmAM kAyado nA hoya. ane ahIM to kAyado ke kazuMya nahIM, sahejA saheja ! saheja pramANe je bane e kharuM. praznakartA : Ape kahyuMne, ke "mokSa che tyAM kAyado nathI, kAyado che tyAM mokSa nathI, parama vinayathI mokSa che. to parama vinayamAM badhuM AvI gayuM pAchuM ? - dAdAzrI : hA, parama vinayamAM badhuM AvI gayuM. kAyado karavA jaze eTale pachI, A tulasI ropI eTale UMdaraDo tulasI kApI gayo, mATe bilADIne rAkhe. bilADIe dUdha bagADyuM mATe kUtarAne rAkho. Ano pAra Ave kharo ? eTale A 'no laoN laoNno kAyado che. ane A to 'vijJAna' mUkeluM che. AmAM AghuMpAchuM karavA jAya, Dakho karavA jAya, e ja enuM gAMDapaNa che. e to "ovaravAIjha'paNuM che ! ame to badhuM kahI daIe, jema che tema. pachI jakke caDhe tyAre ame jANIe ke bahu bhayaMkara ajJAnatA che, e potAnuM ahita ja karI rahyo che. eTale bolIe nahIM pachI. ame mauna rahIe. jakke caDhe eTale ene 368 AptavANI-9 dekhAtI ja nathI ne, mArI vAta ? dekhAya to jakke caDhe ? eTale ahIM AgaLa to kevuM che ? bahu DAhyA rahevAnuM. parama vinaya zabda kahyo eno artha eTalo samajI javAno ke vagara kAmanuM kazuM bolavA-cAlavAnuM nahIM. kAmanuM hoya to bolavuM. potAnuM DahApaNa ke potAnI akkala ahIM ughADI karavAnI nahIM. tamArI akkalo badhI nakala karelI che, daraasala nathI. eTale lokonuM joIne zIkhyA, copaDIonuM zIkhyA ! ane pAchAM caDase caDhe te aTakatAM ya nathI. alyA, caDase caDhe tyAre tamane khabara nathI ke A caDase caDhI rahyuM che ? caDase caDhavuM eTale potAnuM sthAna choDIne nIce paDavuM ! praznakartA: pahelAM to Apa tarata Takora karo ke e paDyo, paDyo, paDyo ! dAdAzrI : te to atyAre ya kahuM chuM ne. paNa te ya kone kahevAya pAchuM ? te amuka ja mANasane 'paDyo, paDyo" kahevAya. bIjAne to ApaNe calAvI levuM paDe. haju enAmAM zakti ja AvI nathI, kazuM kahe to bicAro jato rahe pAcho. jeNe mAruM 'hita-ahita' che evuM jANI lIdhuM hoya, ene evuM kahIe. eTale majabUta thayA pachI kahIe. badhAne evuM nA kahevAya. nahIM to tarata jatAM rahe e to !! "A heMDyA. amAre ghera vahu che, bA che, badhAya che. kaMI kuMvArA chIe ?" ema kaheze. 'nA bhAI, tuM paiNelo che, te badhI rIte barAbara che. paNa A ahIMthI bhaTakyo to A sTezana pharI nahIM maLe, lAkho avatAra jatAM ya." eTale bALakanI peThe samajAvIne besADavA paDe. pAchAM goLIo ApI ApIne. meM badhAne kahyuM chene, ke koNe A samajIne jJAna lIdhuM che ? A badhA paTAvI paTAvIne 'Ava, Ava, A to Ama che, tema che !" paTAvI paTAvIne jJAna ApyuM che. enI pakaDa tA hoya ! have bahAra bIjo koI vAta karato hoya, to "ApaNuM sAcuM che, A ame pakaDyuM che sAcuM che eTaluM mANasamAM rahe. A 'jJAna' maLyA pachI ye evuM rahe to ene bhagavAne ahaMkAra kahyo. A ahaMkAra kADhavo paDaze.

Page #210
370 AptavANI-9 jyAre amane saheje ya graha ke Agraha nahIM. koI paNa bAbatamAM saheja paNa graha nahIM ke Agraha nahIM, ke Ama ja ! eka sekanDe ya nahIMne ! A kharuM che, A satya che, evuM ke amAro Agraha nA hoya. A jJAna thayuM che, e ya Agraha nA hoya. tame kaho ke, 'peluM khoTuM che" to ya Agraha nA hoya. te tamArI draSTithI AvyuM e sAcuM. - ApaNane matabheda koI jagyAe nA paDato hoya, to ApaNe 'karekTa' rastA upara chIe e vAta nakkI mAnI levI. ane matabheda paDe tyAM AgaLa jANavuM ke haju A rasto 'kliyara' nathI thayo. haju upara DuMgara toDavAnAM che, moTA moTA paththara Ave te kADhavAnAM che. nahIM to roDa upara patharo hoya to athaDAya ja ne ?! saraLa thaI ukela lAvavo ! AptavANI-9 369 bahArano koI mANasa utArI pADe, utArI pADavA jAya, to jhAlI pADe, ne jakke caDhAve to jakke hau caDhI jAya. jakke caDhayo, caDase caDhyo ke mithyAtva pharI vaLe. upayoga khalAsa thaI gayo pachI. e badhuM mithyAtva phelAve. bhayaMkara roga kahevAya A to ! A duniyAmAM satya vastu hotI ja nathI. sat avinAzI che. bIjuM sat hotuM ja nathI. bIjuM sApekSabhAva che badho. ane enI pakaDa pakaDe, juo ne ! ane bhagavAnane tyAM satya ne asatya kazuM che nahIM. A badhuM to samAjanA AdhIna che. samAjamAM koI paNa jAtanA manuSya hoya ja, eTale samAja-AdhIna che AkhuM A badhuM. paNa bhagavAnane tyAM vaMdu ja nathI ne ! napho-khoTe ya nathI. bhagavAnane sagAI-bagAIo kazuM che nahIM. ane te sagAI vagaranuM mane dekhAya che ya kharuM pAchuM. huM joI zakuM chuM, zI rIte sagAI nathI te badhuM dekhAya che ya kharuM pAchuM mane. bilakule ya sagAI nathI, nAme ya sagAI nathI. A to eka jhADa upara paMdara-vIsa paMkhIo Ave, te pelAM AmathI AvyAM, bIjAM AmathI AvyAM, ne rAte mukAma thaI gayo, badhAM bhegAM thaI gayA. eTale pachI badhAM ema kahe ke ApaNe kaMI sagAI che A badhI ! te sagAInAM nAme cAlyuM che A. paNa savAramAM pAchAM UDI jAya che pachI. eTale sagAI jevuM kazuM che nahIM. praznakartA : enAM karatAM Trenano dAkhalo sAro paDe. lAMbI musApharImAM bhegA thAya che ne ? dAdAzrI : gADImAM to eTalo ya vicAra kare ke, 'AvuM badhuM duHkha che bhalA AdamIne, te helpa karuM.' sagAI nA mAnene ! ane pAcho pote sTezana Ave, te UtarI paDe. have sAcI vAta pakaDI rAkhavI e jUTha che. satyanuM pUchaDuM pakaDe e asatya ja che ane asatya ye choDI de te satya che. pakaDI rAkhyuM ke badhuM bagaDyuM. te A loko satyanAM pUchaDAM pakaDI rAkhI ane mAra khA khA kare che. jema gadheDAnuM pUchaDuM pakaDI rAkhene ? te lAto khA khA kare, paNa 'nahIM choDuM huM kahe ! saraLa eTale sAcI vAta hoya tyAM tarata vaLI jAya. ApaNo AtmA kabUla kare evI vAta hoya tyAM ya tarata pharI jAya, tyAM pakaDI nA rAkhe. jyAre pakaDI rAkhe ene saraLa nA kahyuM. eTale pakaDa paNa nahIM rAkhavI joIe ne ! pakaDI rAkhavAno bahu moTo guno, vadhAre gunegAra che. praznakartA : be vyaktione aNasamajaNa utpanna thAya, gerasamaja utpanna thAya to vAdavivAda thayA vagara rahe ja nahIM. dAdAzrI : eTale tyAM baMdha karI devuM. praznakartA : eTale koI paNa 'poInTa" para gerasamaja utpanna thAya, ane sAmo mANasa kahe 'tame karekTa cho' nahIM to e vAta choDI ja devI joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, choDI devI. vAMdho zuM che ? nA choDI daIe to sAmAnA manamAM rahyA kare ne ! kaheze, 'A AvuM kema bolyA ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, "zuM bolavuM e "vyavasthita' nathI ? eNe pUchyuM te vyavasthita nathI ?" amArI pAse ukela hoya. nahIM to Ano kyAre pAra Ave ?

Page #211
372 AptavANIpraznakartA : kaSAyo kevI rIte pharI vaLe che ? dAdAzrI : bebhAna karI de. bebhAna kare mANasane, bhAnamAM ja nA rahe ! praznakartA : kaSAya jAgRta thayA che e kevI rIte khabara paDe ? kayA lakSaNathI ? dAdAzrI : kema ? ahaMkAra dubhAya e khabara nA paDe ? A kapaTa mULa guNa emAM. kapaTa eTale aMdhAruM ghora ! kaSAyomAM thoDuM ghaNuM ajavALuM hoya. AptavANI-9 371 paNa ame ukela lAvI nAkhIe. 'A kharo che ane A bhUlyA che' e kahevuM e bhUla che ApaNI. ApaNe tarata ja ema mAnavuM ke, 'bhaI, emanuM sAcuM ne ApaNuM khoTuM.' ema karIne heMDavA mAMDyA eTale emane ya Dakhala nA rahIne ! koIno 'kleIma' rahe nahIM pachI. koIno 'kleIma' rAkhI ane ApaNe chUTIe, evuM bane nahIM ne ! bharelA mAlato pakSa nA laIe ! jyAM ahaMkAra haju bharelo che mahIM, eTale caDhe kharo ne haju. chatAM e nikAlI ahaMkAra che. e sAco ahaMkAra nathI. to paNa pote eno pakSa le. kharAkharI karAvanArA nIkaLyA ! e nA hovuM joIe. - jakke caDhe ne, to AtmAne AvaraNa vadhAre caDhe. jo ke A "jJAna" pachI A badho have vyavahAra mAtra rahyo che. nizcayathI jaka paNa gaI, ya gayo, rAge ya gayo, ne badhuM ja gayuM. have vyavahAra sacetana nathI, e acetana che. acetana eTale ApaNe ene pharI saLI karIe to kAma thAya. nahIM to Ama phUTI phUTIne pachI paDI jAya. avaLI hoya to Ama kude ! koThI phUTe, ne phUTIne enAM lakSaNa batAvIne jatuM rahe, bIjuM kazuM nahIM. Apane samajAyuM ne ? enAM lakSaNa batAve ke e koThI hatI ke zuM hatuM? phUlajharI hatI ke tArAmaMDaLa hatuM ema ApaNane lakSaNa mAlama paDI jAya badhAM ! zuM phUTe che ? koThI phUTe che ke havaI phUTe che ke dhaDAkiyo ?! paNa ApaNA akrama jJAnanAM AdhAre maDadAla ahaMkAra che. eTale jyAre tyAre nIkaLI ja javAno. kramikamAM to jIvato ahaMkAra hoya ane ahIM akramamAM maDadAla ahaMkAra, DrAmeTika badhuM rahyuM. krodha-mAna-mAyAlobha badhuM DrAmeTika rahyuM. e kaSAya rahyA, eno have nikAla lAvavAno che. kapaTa, caturAI bAdhaka mokSamArgamAM ! koI mANase gALa bhAMDI hoyane, to emAM ya ene kaSAyo te ghaDIe pharI vaLe. praznakartA : A badhuM vistArathI phoDa pADo. A kapaTa, kaSAya, ahaMkAra.... dAdAzrI : e badhA rastAmAM rokanAra che. praznakartA : AmAM kapaTa kevI rIte mUMjhavatuM hoya che ? dAdAzrI : kapaTa badhuM mIThuM lagADe, jyAM ne tyAM bhaTakAve. praznakartA : emAM kapaTa pAchuM kevI rIte AvyuM? dAdAzrI : krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha to ochuM kare. kapaTa bahu kare. kapaTa eTale saMsArI dazA ke nahIM, saMsArIthI hIna dazA ! kapaTa vagaranAM mANaso hoya, te saraLa hoya. kapaTavALI prakRti mahAmuzkelI UbhI kare. praznakartA : eka mANase gALa bhAMDI, emAM kapaTanuM kyAM AvyuM ? dAdAzrI : emAM kapaTa nA hoya. kapaTa to potAno lAbha UThAve. tyAre krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha je che emAM mAyA eTale kapaTa. ekadama jaththAbaMdha thaI gayeluM che kapaTa, paNa hisAba to baMdhAyo kapaTano. badhI jagyAe kapaTa hisAba ja baMdhAve. nahIM to koI nAma nA le. A 'jJAna ApyuM che eTale kaSAyo thAya ja nahIM. A to pahelAMnI Teva che ne, cAkhavAnI, eTale e bAju jAya che. nA kahuM toya

Page #212
AptavANI-9 373 khAI Ave. A "jJAna" ja evuM che ke kapaTa rahe ja nahIM, koI paNa mANasane. praznakartA : A kapaTa jAgRti nathI rahevA detuM ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobheya nA rahevA de, kapaTa to bebhAna karI nAkhe. potAne ya khabara nA paDe ke zuM kapaTa thayuM che. potAne khabara nA paDavA de ke huM kapaTa karI rahyo chuM !! krodha-mAna-mAyAlobhanI vakhate to bhAna Ave ya kharuM. A kapaTa to bahu gUDha hoya. emAM karanArane ya khabara nA paDe. praznakartA : emAM karanArane khabara nA paDe, to e oLakhe zI rIte ? kapaTa karanArane potAne ja khabara nA paDe e doSa kADhe kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : ene potAne nahIM, badhAne ! kapaTa thAya tenI khabara ja nA paDe. praznakartA : e kapaTavALA doSo kADhe zI rIte ? dAdAzrI : muzkelI che. praznakartA : e kapaTanuM svarUpa oLakhavuM kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : kapaTanuM svarUpa to saMsAranA potAnA lAbho UThAvavA mATe bIjAone potAnA abhiprAye kheMcavA, bIjAne potAnA abhiprAyamAM laI levA, vizvAsamAM levA ! e karanArane ya khabara nA hoya ke A huM khoTuM karI rahyo chuM. evI khabara ja nA hoya. praznakartA : saMsArI lAbhamAM zuM samAya ? eTale mukhyapaNe mokSano dhyeya hoya e sivAyanuM gaNAyane ? dAdAzrI : mokSano dhyeya to A "jJAna" pachI hoya ja. paNa A lata paDelI jAya nahIM, Adata paDelI jAya ja nahIM. potAne khabara ja nA paDe ne ! potAne khabara ja nA hoya. lobhe ya khabara nA paDe. koI lobhiyAne 'pote lobhI che" evI khabara nA paDe. phakta mAna ane krodha, 374 AptavANI-9 be bhoLA eTale khabara paDI jAya. mAyAnI kaMI khabara paDe nahIM, lobhanI khabara paDe nahIM. praznakartA : eTale kapaTa ghaNuM karIne A saMsArI lAbha mATe.... dAdAzrI : kapaTa to bahu vasamuM. moTAmAM moTI kaDAkUTa hoya to A kapaTa. have e ema ne ema chUTe kyAre ? ke saMsArI lAbha uThAvavAno chUTe, to ! ene to to mokSa ja che ne ! praznakartA : jAgRti ene ja kIdhIne ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti nahIM, A upAya batAvyo. praznakartA : A sAMsArika hita che ne A Atmika hita che evuM rahe ene jAgRti kIdhIne ? - dAdAzrI : e to jAgRti kahevAya. paNa jAgRti ja nA rahe, bilakula jAgRti nA rahene ! jAgRti nA hoya to ja kapaTa pharI vaLe ne ! nahIM to ya pelI lata to chUTavI joIe ne ! lata ! sAMsArika sukho bhogavavAnI je lata paDI ne ! praznakartA : lata AkhI pheravavI paDene ? e lata pAchI phare kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : lata paDelI ja che. atyAre niveDo lAvavAno che. praznakartA: kevI rIte ? dAdAzrI : e lata to, ApaNe "kaMI ja joItuM nathI, mane sukha maLe che' kahyuM ke te lata tarata chUTavA mAMDe. kaMI ja joItuM nathI' nakkI karene, tyArathI lata pharaze. praznakartA : sAMsArika lAbhamAM zuM zuM vastu samAya che ? dAdAzrI : badhI vastuo ! e gADImAM besato hoya to ye Dakho kare, basamAM beTho hoya tyAM ya Dakho, jyAM juo tyAM Dakho kare.

Page #213
376 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : hA, paNa kapaTamAM pRthakkaraNa karavAthI zI rIte jAya ? caturAI hoya ne, mahIM ! AptavANI-9 375 praznakartA : AmAM mahAtmAone 'jJAna' lIdhA pachI kaI kaI bAbato hoya che ? 'dAdAzrI : badhI bAbato ...! emAMthI to Avelo che. badhuM jAmI gayeluM che te atyAre phaLa Ape che. te jAgRtimAM rahIne A phaLa nA cAkhIe ane cAkhIe toya paNa judA rahIe to phaLe. e mIThAM phaLa hoya che ne ! eTale juduM rahI zake nahIMne, mANasa. cAkhe ja ne ! kapaTamAMthI nIkaLavuM muzkela che. kapaTa ekaluM ja jokhamavALuM che. krodha-mAna-mAyAlobha to nIkaLI jAya. praznakartA H to A sAMsArika lAbha, mIThAza, kapaTa to kAyama joDe ne joDe ja rahyuM. to pachI nIkaLavuM muzkelI ja rahI. dAdAzrI : jAgRti 'helpa' karaze. jAgRti ane 'A kazuM joItuM nathI' evuM nakkI kare, evo nizcaya kare ! praznakartA : eTale "mokSa sivAya kazuM joItuM nathI' evo nizcaya karene ? dAdAzrI : hA, kaMI ja joItuM nathI. game tevuM Ave paNa 'kaMI ja joItuM nathI' evo nizcaya joIze. praznakartA H eTale mukhya vastu mokSanuM 'DisIjhana' Ave to pachI gADI pATA upara caDhe. dAdAzrI : 'DisIjhana' to AveluM che mokSanuM. paNa "A nathI joItuM' evuM 'DisIjhana' Ave to ne ! tethI ame badhAne kahIe chIe ne, ke "A duniyAmAM koI cIja mane khapatI nathI' evuM savAramAM pAMca vakhata bolavuM, UThatAMnI sAthe. to evI enI asara rahe. praznakartA: prasaMge prasaMge 'zuM joIe che haju? evuM kyAM varte che?" enuM pRthakkaraNa kare to chUTatuM jAya che, jaldI ? praznakartA: e kevA prakAranI ? caturAIno pAcho jarA phoDa pADo. dAdAzrI : kapaTamAM caturAI hoya. jenI joDe kapaTa karavAnuM chene, to caturAIthI ene vaza karI le. caturAIthI mANasone vaza karI le. ""jJAnI" ekalAne vaza nA kare, mANasone to vaza karI nAkhe. badhAnI joDe caturAI kare, e AvaDatI ja hoya badhI. praznakartA : evI vyaktio je caturAI karatI hoya, teNe chUTavuM hoya to zuM karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : potAne zI rIte khabara paDe ? potAne khabara paDe nahIMne ! caturAIthI pote chUTI zake ja nahIM. ApaNe e caturAImAM nA AvavuM. praznakartA H caturAI prakRti karatI hoya che, evuM thayuM ? dAdAzrI : sAmA mANasanI prakRti caturAI kare che kapaTane laIne, eno kapaTano khela khelavA mATe, to ApaNe emAM nA AvavuM hoya to ApaNe cetavuM joIe. praznakartA : kaI rIte ? dAdAzrI : eka to potAne 'mArA hitanuM che ke ahitanuM che" evuM sAMbhaLatAM AvaDavuM joIe. A to mIThuM bole ne ahitanuM hoya to ene calAvI le che ane kaDavuM bole ne hitanuM hoya to nA calAvI le. praznakartA : paNa e hitane mATe che ke ahitane mATe mane kahI rahyo dAdAzrI : evuM samaje to bahu thaI gayuM ! e 'levala' AvI gayuM to bahu thaI gayuM !! praznakartA: paNa e hitAhita to saMsAranuM ja ne ? Atmika ke

Page #214
378 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : mokSamArge cAlavuM ane A doSothI chUTavuM bahu muzkela thaI paDe evuM che. dAdAzrI : muzkela nathI. Ama bhAvanA karatAM karatAM pahoMcAze. jene A doSo kADhavA che, tene nahIM vAra lAge. muzkela to hoya ja nahIMne ! dareka jaNane evuM kapaTa hoya. A kaLiyugamAM kapaTa kyAM nA hoya ? praznakartA : A to sAmI vyakti joDenA vyavahAramAM kapaTa AvyuM paNa have potAnI prakRti ane AtmA, tyAM paNa kapaTa kAma karatuM hoya ne ? AptavANI-9 377 sAMsArika evo phoDa paDavo joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : e saMsArI ja hoya. Atmika to hoya ja nahIM ne ! pudgalanuM ja hoya. A khase to pelo AtmA prApta thAya. praznakartA : e ApaNA hitane mATe che ke ahitane mATe che e samajIe to enI caturAImAM nA phasAya. dAdAzrI : hitane ane ahitane to pote samaje che. paNa peluM caturAI che ke kema ?" te samajaNa nA paDe. kAraNa ke eka to mIThuM khAvAnI Adata che ene. 'Avo padhAro' kahyuM ke bhAna gayuM. tame game evuM 'padhAro' kaho, paNa ame emAM nA AvIe. praznakartA : mokSano nizcaya hoya to pachI zuM? pachI ApaNane enA zabdo sparze nahIM ne ! dAdAzrI : nizcaya to mokSano che ja, paNa vacce Dakhalo che ne ! 'kevaLa nija svabhAvanuM akhaMDa varte jJAna." nizcaya to che ja, paNa e niraMtara hovo joIzene ? mokSa to varte che, paNa akhaMDa rahevuM joIzene ? khaMDita cAle nahIM ? praznakartA : paNa A hita ke ahita, e beu "AphaTara oNla" sAMsArika 'DipArTamenTanuM thayuM ne ? - dAdAzrI : hA, paNa e saMsArI ja choDavAnuM che. mokSamArgamAM to evuM che ja nahIMne ! bIjuM zuM ? saMsArI ahitane to choDI devAnuM. mANasa jo samajavA bese ne ane mIThAI khAvAnI Teva nA hoya, to A samajaNa paDe evuM che. praznakartA : have pote caturAI kare che, e potAnI caturAI pote choDavAnI zI rIte ? dAdAzrI : e potAne khabara nA hoya. ApaNe kahIe ke, 'tame caturAI karo cho' to ya e nA mAne.. dAdAzrI : nA, emAM nahIM. praznakartA : sAmI vyakti to caturAI kare, paNa emAM potAne mIThAza lAge che to tyAM kapaTa AvyuM ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA. e kapaTa nA kahevAya. e to bhamI jAya bicAro. mIThAza khAvAnI Teva che, eTale bhamI jAya ! praznakartA: jAgRti rahe nahIMne, tyAre ? dAdAzrI : te vakhate jAgRti rahe nahIM. tamane 'Avo, Avo caMdubhAI kahe, have zabda nAda evo hoya che ! 'caMdubhAI tamArAmAM akkala nathI." to e zabdanI zuM asara rahe ? praznakartA : A 'akrama vijJAna evuM che ke peluM eka vakhata to mahIM aDavA ja nA de 'potAne.' 'akkala vagarano' kone kahe che, e pahelI jAgRti UbhI thAya ! dAdAzrI : hA. pahelI jAgRti UbhI thAya. e jAgRti hoya pachI ene aDavAnuM nahIM. 'Avo, Avo' kahe che te kone kahe che, e jAgRti hoya tene kazuM aDavAnuM nahIM. tamAre AvA sUkSma phoDa pADI levA. praznakartA: e bahu jarUra che. A jAgRtinuM aviratapaNe je khaMDita thAya chene, eTale AvA badhA doSo kAma karI jAya che vacce ?

Page #215
AptavANI-9 379 dAdAzrI : A doSo che, te vacce ene 'brekaDAuna' karI nAkhe che. tethI bhagavAne kahyuM ne, ke 'kevaLa nija svabhAvanuM akhaMDa varte jJAna' paNa peluM khaMDita thaI jAya che. eTale mIThAzanI Teva choDI do ane 'kaDavA' to koI kahe nahIM banatAM sudhI. kAraNa ke vyavahAra evo ke kaDavATa koI kahe nahIM. chatAM kaDavA kahe to jANavuM ke A to ApaNuM 'vyavasthita" che. bhogave enI bhUla ! praznakartA : kaDavAzamAM to vadhAre jAgRti rahe. dAdAzrI : eTale mIThAzamAM ja bhamI jAya ! have koI paNa jAtano vAMdho-vacako nA hoya tyAre akhaMDa jJAna varte. A to akhaMDa jAgRtino mArga che. poInTamena', mokSamArgamAM....? ahIM to evuM chene, 'poInTamena' ghaNA hoya. to ApaNe gADI dilhI laI javAnI hoya to kaye gAma jatI rahe ! eTale ApaNA 'poInTathI ja vAta karyA karajo. ahIM to 'poInTamena' keTalA badhA hoya ! | 'meIna lAIna' upara gADI jAya to lUMTAya nahIM. pATo badalAya ke lUMTAI jAya. luMTAya ne pAcho kaye gAma laI jAya tenuM ThekANuM nahIM. eTale "poInTamena' upara jarAya vizvAsa na karavo joIe. enI joDe cA-pANI zarU karIe to pachI AvI gADI pATo badalI nAkhe ne ! praznakartA : A mokSamArgamAM 'poInTamena' kone kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : ApaNane gamatuM bole te 'poInTamena'. ApaNane bole ane ApaNane phera caDhe to jANavuM ke A 'poInTamena' AvyA ! gamatuM bole eTale pharI mana bhamI jAya. eTale "poInTamena' che, te bIje pATe caDhAvI de gADI, eTalI ja 'pIDa'thI ! chatAM bIje pATe jAya te khabara ya nA paDe ke huM bIje pATe chuM. pachI koI kahe, "are, A 'roMga ve' para kyAM AvyA ?" tyAre kaheze, "amAruM 'roMga ve' hoya nahIM koI 380 AptavANI-9 dahADo !" evuM kahe. praznakartA : ethI satata jJAnIno Azaro rAkhavAnuM kahyuM ne ? dAdAzrI : tyAre tethI ja kahyuMne, nahIM to vAta vAtamAM 'poInTamena' maLI Avaze ane gADIno pATo pheravI nAkhe, haDahaDATa ! tyAre A pAchA kahe zuM? 'amArI to rAjadhAnI ekasapresa !' are, paNa pATo badalAyo ! rAjadhAnI, tane koNa nA pADe che ? 'meIna lAIna' para hoya to rAjadhAnI ekasapresa, pATo badalAyo to ye gAma jatI rahe ? dilhI Ave nahIM pachI. ApaNI 'meIna lAIna' khasI nA jAya teno khyAla rAkhavo. A badhI pAchalI Adatone ? e Adato kADhI nathI phakta. ApaNI samajamAM AvavI joIe ke A Adato pAchalI che. praznakartA : nizcayamAM jo baLavAna hoya, sthira hoya, to vyavahAra suMdara thAya ja ne ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAra suMdara thavo joIe ane nA thAya to nizcaya kAco paDI jaze. praznakartA : enuM hokAyaMtra zuM hoya ? 'avaLe pATe, savaLe pATe' enuM pramANa zuM che ? dAdAzrI : eka to ahaMkAranI mIThAza Ave ane avaLe mATe caDhyAnI mIThAza Ave ane 'Imozanala' thato jAya. jyAre 'meIna lAIna' para hoya to nirAkuLatA hoya che. ane peluM to nirAkuLatA khasI jAya, moTuM vyAkuLa lAge, A badhA vicAro, badhuM vyAkuLa lAge. avaLe pATe cAle eTale potAnuM sukha khoI nAkhe. praznakartA : e bhUla bhAMgI kyAre kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : tame phoDavAra samajI jAva to e bhUla bhAMgI kahevAya ke "kevI rIte banyuM ? zarUAta zuM ? zuM thayuM ne zAthI bIje pATe caDhAyuM ?"

Page #216
AptavANI-9 381 A badhA AdhAra khoLI kADho to jANavuM ke bhUla bhAMgI. zarUAtathI ja ke pahele dahADe "zuM thayuM ne zA AdhAre, Ano AdhAra kyAMthI maLI gayo ane kyAMthI 'imozanala thayA, kyAMthI nirAkuLatA gaI" e khabara paDe. praznakartA: A vyavahAra je bane che, emAM to koI dhAraNA ja hotI nathI ke Ama javuM ke Ama javuM. je vyavahAra bane che emAM koI jAtanI pakaDa hotI nathI ke Ama jaIe chIe ke Ama jaIe chIe. bAkI, je nizcaya che emAM khasatuM nathI. dAdAzrI : vyavahAra khasI jAya to nizcaya khasI ja jAya hamezAM. e to tamane lAge evuM badhuM. bAkI, vyavahAra khasyo ke nizcaya khasI jAya. manamAM ema bhAsyA kare ke, "nA, nizcayamAM kazuM kharuM nathI." paNa vyavahAra Dagyo tyAMthI samajI lo ke nizcaya DagI ja gayelo che. A eka cetavA jevuM ! bAkI, pATo nA badalAya tyAre kharuM. koI pheravI nA zake, ApaNo kAna kAco paDe nahIM, tyAre kharuM. A to sAMbhaLyuM ke pheraphAra. ATalA badhA amane kahe che, paNa ame koInuM mAnIe nahIM. praznakartA: Apa mukhyapaNe kaI bAbatamAM mAnavAnI vAta kaho cho ? 382 AptavANI-9 kaheto hoya. amAre evuM thAya to to pachI A satsaMgamAM bhAMjagaDa ja thaI jAya ne ! tame kahyuM, "Ama thaI gayuM, dAdA' ne dAdAe mAnI lIdhuM. e vAtamAM zo mAla che ? praznakartA : e kayA 'eDajasTamenTathI Apa e vastuno svIkAra nathI karatA ? dAdAzrI : huM tarata ja samajI jAuM. eno tola, badhuM mane mAlama paDI jAya. e kahetAMnI sAthe ja samajI jAuM ke A DhaLelA che ane mane pAcho kyAM DhaLAvaDAve che ?! 'jJAnI puruSa'mAM bhoLapaNa Ave to pachI rahyuM ja zuM ? bhoLA jevA dekhAya kharA. jenAmAM kapaTa nathI e bhoLapaNa kevuM ? jyAM bhoLapaNa tyAM kapaTa hoya ja, haMmezAM bhoLapaNa AvyuM to A bAju kapaTa hoya ja. jyAM kapaTa nathI tyAM bhoLapaNa enAmAM 'senTa parasenTa' nathI. praznakartA : eTale kapaTanA AdhAre bhoLapaNa raheluM che ? dAdAzrI : e to 'phUlizaneza" rahelI hoya, kapaTanA AdhAre ! kapaTa jatuM rahe to 'phUlizaneza' nahIM rahe. praznakartA : e kapaTa kevuM ? e kayA prakAranuM kapaTa ? dAdAzrI : badhI prakAranAM ! kapaTa eTale potAthI badhuM gupta rAkhavuM, hareka bAbato gupta rAkhavI. badhI ja prakAranAM kapaTa ! koIno lAbha levAnuM kapaTa, koIne potAthI gupta rAkhavuM, e ya kapaTa ! praznakartA : eTale zenAthI gupta rAkhavAnI vAta che ? dAdAzrI : potAnI vAta jANI nA jAya eTalA sAru. pote khAnagI vAta karatA hoya koI joDe, to bIjI koIka Ave to baMdha karI de ke nA karI de ? praznakartA : evuM bane. dAdAzrI : enuM zuM kAraNa hoya ? dAdAzrI : samya. ame zodhakhoLa karIe ke AmAM samyak zuM che. ane pachI ene zero mArIe. pachI koI amArA kAna khotare to ya kazuM vaLe nahIM. ghaNAM ya loka kahe, 'dAdA bhoLA che.' paNa te mApI to jojo. 'dAdA' to daraasala svarUpa che. bhoLA-boLA nA hoya e to. bhoLA hotA haze ? 'jJAnI puruSa' bhoLA hoya, to pachI mUrakhamAM ne emAM zuM phera ?! vAta to gALavAnI zakti kharI ? kema A vAta karo cho ene gALatAM AvaDe ? praznakartA : ghaNA paricaye khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : kahenArane ya prapaMca nA hoya. kahenAre ya mUrkhAIthI

Page #217
AptavANI-9 383 384 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : e kapaTa kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM kahevAya che ? praznakartA : to bhoLapaNa kyAM AvyuM emAM ? dAdAzrI : kapaTa che eTale bhoLapaNa sAmuM hoya ja. eTalI 'phUlizanesa" nA hoya to kapaTa bane ja nahIM. kapaTa e to 'phulizanesa'nI nizAnI. kapaTa hoya tyAM bhoLapaNa hoya ja. ane bhoLapaNa che tyAM kapaTa che evuM mAnI levuM. praznakartA je pATo kIdho Ape, te pATo badalAI javo nA joIe. to have pATo badalAyo nathI to te pATAno dhyeya kayo gaNavo ? dAdAzrI : mokSano ja dhyeya ! bIjo zuM dhyeya ?! e ja 'meIna lAIna' ! praznakartA ane dhyeya badalAya to beya kaI bAbatano Ubho thAya? dAdAzrI : mokSanI viruddha jato rahe jhapATAbaMdha, vAra nA lAge. paNa potAne to ema ja lAge ke huM mokSanA mArga upara chuM. praznakartA: te tyAM kaMI bhUla rahI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : e ja badhuM kapaTa, ne A 'phulizanesa' badhuM. lokonuM sAMbhaLIne pachI bheda nA paDe ke A kharuM ke khoTuM ? 'voTa Ijha karekTa enDa voTa ijha roMga ?" praznakartA : e 'karekTa' ane 'roMga'nI samajaNa kevI rIte UbhI thAya ? dAdAzrI : kapaTa javuM joIe. praznakartA : e kapaTano ja jarA phoDa pADo ne ! dAdAzrI : darekane potAne khabara ja hoya ke ahIM kapaTa che, bIje ahIM kapaTa che. tyAM sudhI bhoLapaNa hoya. ne bhoLapaNa hoya tyAM koIke kAnamAM kazuM reDyuM ke tarata sAcuM mAnIne ThaMDyA. 'phalANAbhAI marI gayA" sAMbhaLyuM eTale raDavA mAMDe ! paNa ema nA pUche ke, "alyA, kayA bhAI marI gayA ne kayA nahIM ?!" 'phalANA bhAI marI gayA" kahe eTaluM sAcuM ja mAnI le. sagA bApanuM ya sAcuM mAnIe nahIM, kAraNa ke e emanI samajaNathI kahetA hoya. e kapaTa nathI enI pAchaLa, paNa aNasamajaNathI kahetA hoya. praznakartA: 'jJAnI' sivAya AkhA jagatanA lokonI vAto potAnA 'nyU poInTa'nI ja hoya che ne ? dAdAzrI : potAnA 'poInTa'nI ja hoya. ane te 'lyu poInTe' ya sAco hoya to barobara che. e ya pAchuM enI samajaNathI sAcuM hoya. have tyAM AgaLa dahADA kADhavA, sAMbhaLavuM, hA pADavI ane pachI dahADA kADhavA. ane nahIM to ya vaLe kazuM ya nahIM. jeTaluM sAcuM hoya eTaluM vaLe. praznakartA : A samajAyuM nahIM ke e je kahe e sAMbhaLavuM paDe, ho pADavI paDe ane dahADA kADhavA paDe ? dAdAzrI : e kahene, to 'obasTrakTa' nahIM karavuM ApaNe. jANe sAcuM mAnIne beThA hoya, evuM sAMbhaLavuM paDe ApaNe. ane bIjuM badhuM ApaNA hAthamAM ja hoya ne ? ApaNe to samyaka upara AdhAra rAkhavo. samyak kAMTo kyAM jAya che ! 'sinsiyara' to, emanuM sAMbhaLIe eTalA pUratA 'sinsiyara'. emanuM sAMbhaLIe, 'obasTrakTa' nA karIe. sahu potapotAnI bhASAnI vAta kare ne ! ane huM ya evuM kahyuM ke enI bhASAmAM e je kahe che 'e karekTa che.' paNa mArI bhASAmAM meLa ja nA paDe ne ?! dAdAzrI : kapaTa nA jAya tyAM sudhI samajaNa nA paDe. ame jeTaluM bolIe eTaluM 'phITa' kare tyAre rAge paDe. rAge paDI gayuM eTale ApaNe jANIe ke pahoMcaze have. praznakartA : e rAge paDyuM, enAM lakSaNo kevAM hoya ?

Page #218
AptavANI-9 385 praznakartA : ApanI bhASAnuM kevuM hoya ? e zuddha upayoga niraMtarano kevo hoya ? dAdAzrI : e to tame joyo ya nathI, sAMbhaLyo ya nathIne ! praznakartA : e thoDuMka kaho ne ! dAdAzrI : nA, e moDhe nA kahevAya. e to anubhavanI vastu che. e to enI meLe AvIne UbhuM rahe. atyAre to sthaLa A sujha UbhI hoya, sthaLa ! peluM sukSmatama hoya ! have sahu sahunI bhASAnI ja vAta karene ? tame sUkSmatamane samajatA ho, pelo sthULa kaheto hoya. have pelo thoDo sUkSmatama samajavAno hato ? pelo to ghULa ja kahe ne ! A amArI pAse jJAna je sAMbhaLyuM che ke, te A jJAna ja kAma ryA kare. ame je raste gayA te rastAnuM jJAna tame sAMbhaLo cho, te rasto ja tamAruM kAma kADhI nAkhaze. ApaNe to kahIe, 'dAdA, tamArI pAchaLa pAchaLa AvavuM che." eTale pachI ame amAro rasto tamane dekhADI daIe. 'meIna lAIna' para caDhI gayA eTale vAMdho nahIMne ! gADI bIje pATe caDhI hatI evuM jANene, to ya ukela Ave. jANyA vagara paDI rahe to muzkelI. e to ema ja jANe ke ApaNI bhUla nathI. praznakartA : evuM pAchuM mAne ?' dAdAzrI : hA, pAchuM uparathI pAcho rakSaNa kare. paNa koInI ye bhUla dekhAya to e ja ApaNI bhUla che. enI bhUla eNe jovAnI che. bIjAne enI bhUla jovAno zuM adhikAra ? A to vagara kAmanA nyAyAdhIza thAya che. kaMI bhUla che ke nahIM, te khAtarI ye nathI to zAnA bolo che ? A to potAnA svArthathI bolo cho. sAmAnI bhUla che ke nahIM enI khAtarI zuM ? eTale A vijJAna ja badhA doSa kADhaze. nahIM to bIjA koI vijJAna doSa kADhe nahIM. pachI kaMI evo tAla pharI bese nahIM. mATe cetI jaIne kAma karavuM sAruM. manamAM 'levala" potAnI meLe kADhavuM nahIM, nahIM to mANasa aTakI 386 AptavANI-9 jAya. potAnI meLe 'levala' kADhavuM nahIM, bIjA kADhI Ape to ja kAmanuM. praznakartA : e manamAM 'levala' kaI bAbatanuM ? dAdAzrI : A AmAM ja, A mokSamArgamAM dareka pote potAnuM 'levala' kADhIne beTho hoya. ane te sAva khoTuM hoya, emAM akSare ya sAco nA hoya, ane 'levala' mAnIne bese to aTakI jAya tyAM mANasa, hajI to gADI pATA parathI khasI jatAM vAra nahIM lAge. ATalI badhI nabaLAIomAM A pUrNatAe lAvavuM, eTale badhuM samajavuM paDaze. paheluM to kapaTa ja javuM joIe. A to je ApaNuM nahIM, tyAM ja badhI zakti vaparAI jAya che. praznakartA : ane kapaTathI ene ja pAchuM DhAMkavAnuM ! dAdAzrI : hA, ene ja DhAMkavAnuM. apanA kucha nahIM, to ya eno pakSa kare. alyA, nakkI karyuM ke apanA kucha nahIM, to ya eno pakSa karyo ? tyAre e kahe che, "bhUlI gayo." praznakartA : e bhUlI jAya che ke pakSa haju eTalo chUTyo nathI ? dAdAzrI : pakSa chUTyo nathI. e to bhUlI gayo ema bole, tatparatuM paNa pakSa chUTe nahIM ne ! eTale ceto, badhI rIte ceto, bahu cetavAnuM che. praznakartA : e kharI vastu che. Aje mokSamArgano dhyeya nakkI thayo che, paNa enAM je bAdhaka athavA anumodaka kAraNonuM spaSTa vibhAjana nA thAya tyAM sudhI 'A' pATe gADI sthira rahevI ane pUrNAhuti thavI emAM bahu bahu muzkelI dekhAya che ! dAdAzrI : muzkelI bole to pachI kAma ja nahIM thAya. mATe evuM kahIe ke A vijJAna tame evuM ApyuM che ke koI muzkelI che ja nahIM ! mAre zuM ?' mArA "jJAna" ApyA pachI tamAro AtmA jato rahyo ? koI

Page #219
388 AptavANI-9 bena hoya ke bhAI hoya ke mA hoya, paNa A to kaheze, "mAre AptavANI-9 387 dahADo jato raheto nathI ne ? te AtmA kevo ?! bAkI, saMsAramAM AtmA che nahIM. kAraNa ke AtmAne vAge nahIM. ane A lokone to vAge che, eTale e AtmA nhoya. AtmAne apamAna lAge nahIM. ane apamAna lAge, mATe e AtmA nhoya. 'phAIla'nA hisAba cUkate to karavA paDaze ne ? 'mAre zuM ?" karIne AvatA raho, tethI kaMI chUTI gayA ? pelA loko manamAM aMTAyA kare. 'javA do ne, che ja evo.' 'mAre zuM?' kahIe eTale loka choDI de ? mATe milanasAra thAva. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, A jamAnAmAM badhAM ema ja samaje che ke 'mAre zuM ?" dAdAzrI : 'mAre zuM ?" evuM mANasa bole ne, to bahu jokhama kahevAya. "mAre zuM ?" e bolAya ja kema karIne ? e to thabokA pADavA jevo zabda kahevAya. 'mAre zuM ?' kahe che, to tuM kevo che te ?! "mAre zuM? e zabda ja nA hovo joIe. te ame ya bolyA nathI ke mAre zuM ?" kAraNa ke ame 'jJAnI puruSa' to ya "mAre zuM ?" nahIM bolavAnuM. hamaNAM koI game tevI paristhitimAM Avyo hoya to ye 'mAre zuM ?' nahIM bolavAnuM. amArA kuTuMbamAM eka baI 'opha' thaI gaI, te eno chokaro kahevA Avyo. mane kahe che, 'dAdAjI, tamane jaNAvavA mATe ja Avyo chuM." ane meM kahyuM, 'bhaI, jo atyAre kahe che, paNa moDuM thaI gayuM che ne !" tyAre e kahe, nA, tamAre AvavAnI jarUra nathI.' chatAM ya huM tyAM pAMca miniTa jaI Avyo, ne AvIne nahAyo hau pAcho. eTale vyavahAramAM 'mAre zuM' evuM nA cAle. vyavahAra vyavahAranI rIte hovo joIe ne ! kaMI AtmA jato raheto nathI ne ! praznakartA : koI paNa vyakti pratye A "mAre zuM ?" e bhAva je che, e zuM sUcave che ? dAdAzrI : nAlAyakI ! "mAre zuM ?" evuM kahevAya ja zI rIte ? ApaNe emane tyAM janmyA to 'mAre zuM ?" evuM kahevAtuM haze ?! e to guno che. 'mAre zuM ?" evuM bolAya nahIM. gharamAM to nA rakhAya evuM, paNa bahAre ya nA rakhAya. e to gunA che badhA. praznakartA e kaI prakArano guno kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : sAcuM pepara ja nathI, pachI bhUla khoLavAnI ja kyAM rahI ?! bhUla to, pepara sAcuM hoya tyAre bhUla gaNAya. 'mAre zuM ?" bole che tyAM AgaLa sAcuM pepara ja nathI, pepara ja 'roMga" che. haDeDa parasenTa roMga ! praznakartA : ApanuM vAkya che ke "mAre zuM?" kahe che e bhagavAnano ya gunegAra che ane kudaratano ya gunegAra che. dAdAzrI : Akho ya gunegAra che. ene to pachI rahyuM ja nahIM ne, gunAmAM to. pepara ja vAMcavA jevuM rahyuM nahIM. pachI bhUla kyAM rahI ? bhUla kyAre jovAnI ? pepara jovA jevuM hoya to. paNa A to pepara jovA jevuM ja nathI, pachI bhUla ja kyAM rahI ? A "mAre zuM ?" bole eTale ja moTAmAM moTuM jokhama vahoNuM. praznakartA: 'mAre zuM ?" evuM je mahIM baMdhAI gayuM che, emAMthI pAchuM pharavuM hoya to kevI rIte pharI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : "mAre zuM ?" e to chellI DigrI kahevAya. emAMthI pAchuM pharavAno rasto, e to je raste UMdhA AvyA hatA, te raste pAchI pAchuM nIkaLavAnuM. praznakartA : eTale pAchA pharavAnA rastAmAM zuM karavAnuM kahyuM Ape ? 'mAre ?" bolavuM e to moTo guno kahevAya. 'mAre zuM !" e zabda hoya ja nahIM amArI DikSanarImAM. 'mAre zuM ?" e zabda to ghare yu nA bolAya, bahAre ya nA bolAya, ahIM satsaMgamAM ya nA bolAya. mAre zuM ?" bolAtuM haze ? pachI e ahaMkAra jAya ja nahIM. e ahaMkAra to nibiDa thaI gayo. pachI e khase nahIM, tUTe nahIM koI dahADo ya.

Page #220
AptavANI-9 389 dAdAzrI : je raste tame AvyA hoya, te raste nIkaLavAno rasto hoya. mane zuM khabara paDe tame kaye raste gayA ho ? tame jANo ke jya raste tame peThA hatA. tame peThA hatA, te raste pAchA nIkaLo eTale e UDI jAya. praznakartA eTale kevI rIte karavAnuM emAM ? dAdAzrI : pratikramaNa karI karIne ! praznakartA: 'mAre zuM ?" kahevAthI AsaktibhAva ocho nA thaI jAya ? vadhu paDatI je Asakti hoya e ochI thaI jAya nahIM enAthI ? dAdAzrI : are, Asakti ochI thavAnI vAta kyAM gaI, paNa UlaTo Asaktine AkhuM oLaMgIne khalAsa thaI jAya mANasa. te A bAvA badhA bahu thaI gayelA ke "hamaku kyA ? hamaku kyA ? hamaku kyA ?" badhA bAvA khalAsa thaI gayA. koI dahADo ya nA bolAya "mAre zuM ?" 'mAre zuM ?" eTale nispRha ! kAM to spRhI thA ke kAM to 'jJAnI puruSa'nI peTha deha mATe nispRhI ane AtmA mATe spRhI, eTale saspRhInispRhI thA. A bemAMthI eka rahe. bAkI, nispRhI bilakula nA thaI jaIza. nahIM to patharo ja thaI jaIza. "mAre zuM ?" bolAya nahIM. 'mAre zuM?" kahevuM e badhI buddhinI phasAmaNa. buddhi zuM nA phasAve ? ane e je evuM bole che ne, e buddhi ja ene phasAve che. chatAM ko'kane A sAhajika thaI gayeluM hoya, eTale buddhi vAparavI nathI paDatI, ema ne ema abuddhipUrvaka bole che. buddhipUrvaka bole to to evuM sAhajika nA bole. abuddhipUrvaka eTale ema ne ema sAhajika AvuM ja bolI javAya. mAre zuM ?" kaheze. ko'kane sAhajika thaI gayuM, e zuM kare have ? to ya sudhAravAnuM che have. eTalA mATe to ame 'meIna lAIna' badalI ApIe, kaI 'lAIna' para rahevuM e 'lAIna' dorI ApIe. pelI e lAIna to yujhalesa lAIna.' e 'lAIna' sAva khoTI hatI, UDADI melo. bIjI relave lAIna nAkhI ApIe, eTale enA upara A gADI calAvavAnI. 390 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : ApaNuM aMdarathI cokkasa rAkhavuM, potAno mArga cUkavo nahIM. dAdAzrI: mArga cUkavo nahIM. ane jANI-joIne cUke, e bane ya nahIM. e to ajANathI ja cUkAya che. mokSano mArga koI jANI-joIne cUke nahIM. kAta daIne sAMbhaLavuM ....?! koI mANasa joDe kaMI bhAMjagaDa thaI hoya, tyAM koI beThuM hoya, ne te pachI bhego thAya to tene pUche ne, ke mArA gayA pachI e zuM bolatA hatA ? evuM bane ke nA bane ? praznakartA : hA, evuM bane. e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e vastu Akho ya mokSamArga ja uDADI de. 'mArA sAru zuM bolatA hatA ?" evuM je rahe, to Akho mokSamArga UDI jAya. praznakartA : evuM zAthI ? dAdAzrI : bhayaMkara avaLo mArga kahevAya e.. praznakartA : paNa emAM kayuM tatva, zuM kAma karI rahyuM che ? dAdAzrI : zA mATe ema pUchavuM paDe che? pote kaMI cora che, te pUchavuM paDe ke mAre mATe zuM bolatA hatA e ? potAnI jAta upara vizvAsa nathI, eTale ja sAmAne pUchavuM paDe che ke "mArI pAchaLa zuM bolatA hatA e ?" huM koI dahADo mArI pAchaLa tapAsa rAkhuM chuM ke "mArI pAchaLa zuM bole che' ? e game te bolato hoya, mArA moMDhe bolato hoya to ya mane vAMdho nahIMne ! ane A to potAne mahIM kapaTa che tethI pUche che. praznakartA : ene ya kapaTa kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. tethI to 'e zuM bolatA hatA ?' evuM pelAne pUche che pAcho ! praznakartA : ke e ahaMkAra kahevAya ?

Page #221
392 AptavANI-9 AptavANI-9 391 dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra zAno baLyo ? A potAnuM chUpAvavA mATe badhuM. jene potAnuM chUpAvavAnuM nathI, tene chone bole duniyA ! e vaLI AvI tapAsa karato haze ke "mArI pAchaLa zuM bolatA hatA" te ? game tevuM gAvuM hoya to gAme, tArI meLe. alyA, mArI rUbarU gA. hoya to ne, mAre bhAMjagaDa che ? huM dArU pIto houM to bhAMjagaDa che ne ? mArI rUbarU gA ne ! eTale huM kaMI tapAsa nA karuM ke "mArI pAchaLa zuM bolaze, zuM kahetA hatA ?" jene je paDaghA pADavA hoya te pADe. enI samajaNa pramANe bicArA kare. ene kaMI samajaNa che A badhI ? e to khAtAM AvaDe eTalI ja che. te ya eMThavADo pADe, baLyo ! praznakartA : paNa AvuM jyAre Apa phoDa pADo ke A bAdhaka vastu che, tyAre samajAya. AvAM keTalAMya doSo che. e badhA kADhavA paDazene ! mATe pAchaLa game te bole, enI ApaNane paravA nA hovI joIe. nahIM to ApaNe khoTA ja chIe, enI khAtarI thaI gaI. hAsto ne, zA mATe sAMbhaLavAnI nAlAyakI karI ? mATe gunegAra che to ne ? samajavuM to paDaze ne ? Ama kaMI cAlaze ? vAta kema lAge che ? A to saMsAramAM hatuM teno te svabhAva rahyo ane mokSamAM javuM che ! be sAthe nA bane ne ! eTale A ye samajavA jevo "poInTa' che ne ? kyAre zuM AvIne UbhuM rahe e zuM kahevAya ? badhI rIte nabaLAI tUTavI joIe ne ? dhyeya toDI nAkhe evuM badhuM hoya, tyAM zuM thAya ? nAnI amathI bhUla dekhAya nahIM to zuM kAma kare e jANo cho ? bhamAvI de mANasane ! bhamI gayA pachI kevaDI moTI bhUla kare ? vipharyo pachI ahaMkAra ! mATe 'prAIvasI" sAMbhaLavAno prayatna nA karavo ke, "ApaNA mATe zuM bole che." ane AmAM 'InTaresTa' zAthI hoya che ? potAnuM kapaTa hoya che eTale. kapaTa nahIM kAma lAge, saheje ya ! ane koI mANasa vAta ApaNI sAMbhaLIne Avyo hoya ne, te mANasa ApaNane pAcho mITho lAge. praznakartA : e lAvanAra mANasane zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : lAvanAra mANasane aDavA ja nA devo. dAdAzrI : pAchaLa game te bole to ya mahIM kazuM thAya nahIM, evI ApaNI jAta karI nAkhavI. are, kAna daIne hau sAMbhaLe ! arere, kAna daIne sAMbhaLatA hoya !! kaI jAtanA nAlAyaka mANaso ? ApaNe mATe bolatA hoya, to ApaNAmAM kaMI paNa guno haze ne ? nahIM to koNa nAma denAruM che ? vaLI kAna daIne sAMbhaLavuM e keTalI badhI nAlAyakI che ! jonArAne kevuM kharAba lAge ? e bhayaMkara guno che. cho ne duniyA AkhI bole. ghaNA ya loko kahe che, 'dAdA, tamArA mATe Ama bole che !" meM kahyuM, 'hA barobara che. sAruM bole che. pachI kaheze, "peparamAM hau chapAve che.' 'peparamAM chapAve to sAruM. ullu A dAdAne oLakhyA ne !' mane bhaDaka kyAre ke doSa mArAmAM hoya to ! nahIM to AkhI duniyA che te bhUMkyA kare, paNa "sTroMga" hoya tene zuM ?! praznakartA: jene A dizA cUkavI nathI, e ja nizcaya hoya to ? dAdAzrI : e nizcaya to hoya ja. paNa joDe joDe pAchuM peluM ArAdhavuM che, e ya nakkI rAkhe che ne ? e to eka doSa thayo, hajuM to praznakartA : ema nahIM. lAvanAra mANasanI sthiti zuM kahevAya, jema sAMbhaLanArane kapaTa kahevAya tema ? dAdAzrI : lAvanArane to vacce A 'inTaresTa' Ave, A benI bhAMjagaDa jAme evA enA rasamAM hoya, taraboLa hoya. praznakartA enuM ya e kapaTa ja kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, e badhuM kapaTa ja ne ! eka jAtano svAda khoLe che, 'inTaresTa' che.

Page #222
394 AptavANI-9 393 praznakartA : eka jAtano svAda khoLe che, tyAM badhuM kapaTa ja hoya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM hoya ? sugaMdha AvavI joIe, sugaMdha ! kahevuM paDe, phalANA bhAInI vAta kahevI paDe !' kaheze. evI sugaMdha Ave. praznakartA : e mokSanA mArge cAlanArAnI draSTi kevI hoya ? enI samaja kevI hoya niraMtara ? dAdAzrI : e badhuM kahyAthI nahIM vaLe evuM. kapaTabhAvane badhuM chUTe to, potAnAmAM je kapaTa hoya te chUTe to, jeTalI khabara hoya eTaluM nIkaLI jAya. bAkI, bIjuM to khabara vagaranuM bahu paDeluM hoya. kapaTabhAva eTale zuM ? potAnA dhaNIne jo enI khabara paDatI hoya to ene kyArano ya kADhI mele ! mATe ceto, bIvera, bIvera, bIvera ! koInI vAta sAMbhaLIe, te to ApaNuM magaja hau kharAba karI nAkhe. ApaNI vAta bIjA pAsethI sAMbhaLIne ApaNane kahe, te ghaDIe ApaNane mIThuM lAge pAchuM. badhAnAmAM hoya A roga. paNa keTalAMkane A jANavAnI bahu icchAo nA hoya. ko'ka dahADo koI AvIne kahe ne, to jarA sAMbhaLe kharone, to e ya ene pAchuM mIThuM lAge. potAnI IcchA purI thaIne ! sAMbhaLIne lAvyA ! have A kahenAro je hoya ne, tene khabara nA hoya ke A huM zuM karI rahyo chuM. e enA tAnamAM hoya. vAta nA samajavI paDe A badhI ? ane vacalo mANasa zuM kare ? ko'ka phero UMdhuM bAphe, te ghaDIe ApaNuM mana kevuM thaI jAya ? mana bagaDI jAya, vikhavAda UbhA thAya ane ApaNane ya niraMtara nukasAna kare. enA karatAM A 'sisTama" ja nA rAkhI hoya to ? jaDa mULathI ukhADI dIdhI hoya to ? 'bijhanesa' ja nahIM, e "AITama' ja nahIM to zuM khoTuM ? dhaNI pUche ke "bairI zuM bolatI hatI ?" ne bairI pUche, "dhaNI zuM bolatA hatA ?" zA sAru badhuM jANavAnI IcchAo ? pote UMdhA tethI ne ! ane potAnuM chatuM hoya to kaMI jANavAnI IcchA thAya ? enI spRhA zI ? duniyAno to A khorAka che, moTAmAM moTo ! A to "holiDe' kahevAya ! e Teva ahIM nahIM rahevI joIe. AptavANI-9 praznakartA: paNa dAdA, koInA DarathI ene kapaTa karavuM paDe, tyAM zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : DarathI kapaTa karavAnuM hoya ja nahIM. paNa Dara ja zAno ApaNane ? cora hoya, tene Dara hoya ne Dara vaLI ApaNane kyAM ? gunegArane Dara ke binagunegArane ? pote gunegAra tethI Dara lAge. paNa gunegAra baMdha thaI jAvane. praznakartA: eka dhyeya pakaDAya ke mokSe javuM che ane e sivAya kaMI khapatuM nathI ane mokSamArganAM bAdhaka kAraNo kayAM ? ATaluM ja spaSTa thaI jAya to badhI bhAMjagaDo UDI jAya ne bahu saheluM thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : baLyuM, evuM ja nakkI thAya ke "mokSane mATe ja joIe che, bIjuM nathI joItuM.' to bahu thaI gayuM. evuM thaI jAya to kAma ja nIkaLI jAya ne ! A hajI to potAne eme ya manamAM thaI jAya ke 'phalANA bhAI mAre mATe sAruM bole to sAruM.' ane pelA mokSamArgI to sAcuM jANavAnA kAmI jevA hoya, mokSanA kAmI hoya, bIjo Dakho ja nahIM. jANuM chuM' - ApaghAtI kAraNa ! praznakartA : A mokSamArgamAM moTAmAM moTuM bAdhaka kAraNa 'huM jANuM chuM, huM samajuM chuM" e kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e ApaghAtI kAraNa che. praznakartA : eno jarA vadhAre phoDa pADo. e chUTe to kevAM lakSaNo hoya ? e doSa vartato hoya to kevAM lakSaNo hoya ? ane enI sAme kevI rIte jAgRti rahI zake ? dAdAzrI : A nAnAM chokarAM moTI uMmaranA mANasothI bhaDake che. kAraNa ke enI akkalano tApa e chokarAM upara paDe che, eTale chokaruM bhaDake pachI. eTale zuM karavuM paDe ? bALaka jevuM thaI javuM paDe. enAM jevAM ja aNasamajaNavALA bALaka ! "DiliMga" ja bALaka jevuM karavuM paDe, tyAre e sAmA chokarAM rame ApaNI joDe. mArI joDe badhAM, AvaDuM doDha varSanuM

Page #223
AptavANI-9 395 chokaruM hau rame, Ama sarakhe sarakhA ja hoIe evuM rame. evuM kaMI pariNAma to AvavuM joIe ne ? Ane vicArajo ne to eka dahADo samajAze. jANyuM eTale jaDe ane niSpakSapAtI valaNa hovuM joIe. chatAM mahIM ajAgRtine lIdhe nA ye jaDe, to pachI dhIme rahIne ko'ka dahADo jaDe. badhA avaLA vyavahAra 'A' doSathI ja bane. avaLA jene kahevAmAM Ave, te badhA 'A' doSanA kAraNathI ja bane. mukhya A doSa ke "huM jANuM chuM'! bIjA badhA doSa pachInA. A doSamAMthI badhuM UgeluM. kheMca rahe te A doSathI ja. nahIM to saraLatA hoya. jeTalo amArI joDe meLa paDe che, evo lokonI joDe meLa paDI javo joIe. mArI joDe kema meLa paDI jAya che ? jyAM kudaratI rIte meLa paDI jAya e to sahaja vastu che. temAM puruSArtha zo ApaNo ? jyAM meLa nA paDato hoya, tyAM meLa pADavo e puruSArtha. e roga badhAne mahIM hoya. 'huM kaMIka jANuM chuM' e kepha sAthe jJAna vadhatuM jAya. A kephano aMtarAya nA hoya to to 'jJAna' bahu suMdara vadhI jAya, 'phITa' thaI jAya. praznakartA : e kepha na lAvavo hoya to ya ghaNIvAra AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, e to thaI jAya, svAbhAvika rIte. praznakartA : e kepha khalAsa kaI rIte thAya ? 396 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : A kaSAya utpanna na thavA devA mATe zuM zuM karIe chIe ! evuM e utpanna nA thAya evI jAgRti rAkhavAnI. praznakartA : e kepha nathI utpanna thayo, enI khabara paDe potAne ? dAdAzrI : moTuM rUpALuM dekhAya. ekadama rUpALo dekhAya, kALo hoya toya ekadama rUpALo dekhAya. A to badhA kadarUpA dekhAya ! khabara nA paDe evuM hotuM haze baLyuM ?! A tAjI bhAjI che ke be dahADAnI che, evuM nA khabara paDe ? enA jevI A vAta. A kaMI jhINI vAta ochI che ? A to uparathI mAlUma paDI jAya. badhAneya kepha ocho-vatto hoya. amuka ja mANaso enAthI nivRtta thaI jAya, samajI gayA hoya te. kepha hoya tyAM lAvaNya nA dekhAya. ajAgRtithI A badhuM thAya. jAgRti hoya to kazuM yA thAya nahIM. ajAgRtimAM evI khoTI vastu utpAdana thaI jAya, jAgRtimAM nA thAya. praznakartA : dAdA, evo doSa Ubho thato hoya, to jAgRti kevI rAkhavI joIe ? dAdAzrI : e to jabarajasta jAgRti hoya to utpanna nA thAya. A to jAgRti ja nA kahevAya ne ! jAgRti hoya to pelo choDavo Ubho thAya nahIM ne ! A kephano choDavo to "jJAna" thayA pachI Ugelo che, A choDa ja pachI Ugelo che. 'jJAna' ApyuM te ghaDIe pelA badhA jUnA choDa to UDI gayA, paNa pachI A navo choDa Ubho thayo. e che te jAgRti hoya to nA thAya. badhuM ajAgRtithI ja che, A je che e. ane gADAM bharIne ajAgRti hoya che. ekAda-be guNo jeTalI ajAgRti nahIM. keTalI badhI sthaLa ajAgRti hoya tyAre A UbhuM thAya. nahIM to UbhuM ja nA thAya ne ! praznakartA : AmAM zI bAbatanI jAgRti rahevI joIe ? dAdAzrI : badhI bAbatanI. Uge nahIM evuM joIe. praznakartA : eTale zuM zuM hoya emAM ? dAdAzrI : eTale e UbhuM kema thAya ? UbhuM thAya che e ja dAdAzrI : e utpanna ja nahIM thavA devAno. nahIM to utpanna thayA pachI kepha baMdha nA thAya, pachI e UDe kare nahIM. eTale e utpanna ja nahIM thavA devAno. praznakartA : paNa dAdAjI, A to sUkSma kephanI vAta. Ama to kepha dekhAto na hoya. dAdAzrI : badhuM sUkSma ja hoya, dhaNIne ya enI khabara nA hoya. praznakartA : ene utpanna na thavA devo, e kevI rIte banI zake ?

Page #224
AptavANI-9 397 ajAgRti. jAgRti eTalI ochI kahevAya. UbhuM kema thAya ? kaSAya thAya te ghaDIe kema jAgRti thaI jAya che ?! sAmo mANasa kaSAya karato hoya, toya jAgRta thaI jAya che. potAne kaSAya thAya to ya jAgRta ! A kaSAya karatAM ya bhUMDuM, ApaghAtI tattva A ! ApaNo ghAta kare. kaheze, 'jANIe chIe ane kaMI thatuM nathI,' jANyAno pAcho kepha ! paNa tyAM emane to ajJAnatAthI to hamezAM kepha ja hoya. paNa ahIM A "jJAna" pachI jo kadI kepha caDhe to keTalI UMdhI samaja kahevAya ? jJAna jANelAno kepha ? ajJAnatAno to kepha hoya ! praznakartA : kaSAya to dAdAjI, saMyogathI Ubho thAya che. saMyoga Ave tyAre jAgRti rahI zake, e niraMtara jevI vastu nathI. jyAre A kepha che, e aMdara niraMtara paDyo hoya ? dAdAzrI : A to UgyA ja karato hoya, pANI ke chAMTatA hoya, pANI ye chaMTAyA karatuM hoya. rAta-dahADAnI ajAgRti. e ja ApaghAtI kahuM ne ! jANyuM enuM nAma kahevAya ke sarvasva prakAranA kepha utarI jAya. praznakartA : atyAre koInI sAthe dAdAjInA 'jJAna' vize vAta karatA hoIe, to pahelAM manamAM ema hoya ke "jANuM chuM." dAdAzrI : hA, basa e A rogane ! praznakartA : to vAta kevI rIte karavI, dAdAjI ? dAdAzrI : paNa e vAta to, emAM barakata nA Ave, meLa paDe nahIM ne ! sAmAne 'phITa' ja kema thAya ? 'huM jANuM chuM' e moTo roga ! tethI ame kahIe ne, sAmA joDe ame pelA "e" goThavIe. amane pelo roga nA hoya, eTale goThavAI jAya. amAre bilakula ya e roga nA hoya. A AvAM koI roga amane nA hoya. amArI pAse besavAthI sarva roga jatA rahe. pUchI pUchIne karI levuM. ema ne ema besI rahIe te ya kAmanuM nahIM. nahIM to ema ne ema to '(TayUbolAITa' ya besI rahe che mArI joDe ! nathI besI rahetI ? kokanI joDe bhAMjagaDa paDI hoya to 'huM jANuM chuM' e enA manamAM 398 AptavANI-9 lakSamAM hoya ne vAtacIta karavA jAya, te kesa Akho baphAI jAya. 'levala' nA maLe ne ! 'levala' Ave ya nahIM ne ! praznakartA H dAdAjI, jAgRti evI rahevI joIe ne, ke jarAka khoTo vicAra Ave ke tarata, sekanDe sekanDe pakaDAya. dAdAzrI : hA, e pakaDAya to bahu thaI gayuM. UgatAM ja pakaDAvuM joIe. tethI ame kahIe chIe ne, nIMdI nAkhajo UgatAM ja, bIjo bhAga dekhAya ke nIMdI nAkhajo. paNa e jAgRti vagara zI rIte bane ? ane jAgRti bahu moTI joIze. ApaNe AzA ye zI rIte rAkhIe ? eTale badhI AzA rAkhI zakAya nahIM ne ! mATe upAya karavAno. koI AvIne kahe, 'tamAruM jJAna bahu UMcuM. che." te ghaDIye samajavuM ke ahIM roga Ubho thaI jaze have. roga UbhA thavAnuM pratyakSa kAraNa ! ApaNe tyAM cetI javuM. pahelAM koI vakhata AmAM mIThAza vartelI ? je dahADe mIThAza varte, te dahADe e Uge. ane pharI mIThAza varte te AvaDI moTI kUMpaLo kADhe. jema AMbo kUMpaLa kADhe che ne ! be pAMdaDe AvaDo, bIjA be pAMdaDe ATalo UMco thaI jAya, ema vadhatuM jAya. mIThAzanuM pANI ApaNe pI gayAM ke vadhyuM. 'zuM caMdubhAI, tame to ohoho, jJAnI ja thaI gayA.' te e sAMbhaLIne jo mIThAza AvI, ke UgyuM mahIM !!! have evuM thAya ne, to tyAM AgaLa bIjo upAya karavo, tarata bhUMsI nAkhavuM. ApaNe tyAM upAya che. roga to svAbhAvika utpanna thAya. je bIja paDyuM hoya, eno roga to utpanna thAya. paNa upAya che ApaNe tyAM. ApaNe tyAM A 'vijJAna' upAya vagaranuM nathI ne ?! praznakartA : nA, ahIMnA eka eka vAkya badhA rogane UDADe evA dAdAzrI : hA, upAya che. ApaNe tyAM AnuM mULa AmAMthI thayuM che ke 'ghaNuM sarasa thaI gayuM che' enI mIThAza vartI ke phUTya !! ane A vastu mIThI ne ? mokSa bAjunuM bhUlADI de evuM.

Page #225
AptavANI AptavANI-9 399 praznakartA : paNa e jokhama, jabarajasta jokhama che, mokSamArgane mATe, dAdAzrI : jokhama, AtmaghAtI !! koI evuM kahe tyAre kahevuM, 'bhaI, mArI vAta to huM ja jANuM chuM, tamane zuM khabara paDe ?' eTale pachI e TADho thaI jAya. ApaNe kaMI guru thaI besavuM che ? praznakartA : dAdA, chUTavA jevuM che. AmAMthI. dAdAzrI : bahu moTI phasAmaNa ! ane chatAMya peluM udaya Ave to lokone "helpa' karavI, e to ApaNuM kAma che. paNa udaya AveluM hovuM joIe. guru thaI besavAmAM phAyado nahIM, udaya AveluM hovuM joIe. enI meLe ja udaya Ave. je "sITa' nA joItI hoya te 'sITa' para ja besavuM paDe, to vAta judI che. eTale ene mATe AkAMkSA nahIM rAkhavI ! potAnA peparamAM pote ja mArka mUke, to koI nApAsa thAya ? praznakartA : koI nA thAya. dAdAzrI : pote pepara tapAse, pote mArka mUke ne pote nApAsa thAya to huM jANuM ke 'jajamenTa' che. paNa evuM hoya nahIM ne ? praznakartA : A to pAcho pote bahAra namra dekhAvAnI paNa mahenata karato hoya. dAdAzrI : tethI ApaghAta karyuM ne ! e ApaghAta lAve. ApaNe to eTaluM jovAnuM ke loko AkarSAya che ? nA, nathI AkarSAtA. to ghaNo roga che haju. AkarSaNa eTale cokhkhuM ja ! cokhkhuM thavA mAMDyuM ke AkarSAya. praznakartA nahIM dAdAjI, loko to AkarSAya. thoDA vakhata mATe to AkarSAya ne ? dAdAzrI : nA. e jarAya nahIM ne ! UbhuM ja nA rahe ne koI ! pahele ja dahADe UDI jAya balba ! eka-be dahADA mATe nabhAvI le loko, pachI nabhAve nahIM. A to 'jJAnI puruSa' che, to ApaNane doSanI khabara paDe. nahIM to ene potAne khabara ja zuM paDe ? cAlI sTImara kocIna bhaNI ! hokAyaMtra bagaDI gayuM che, eTale kocIna cAlI ! dakSiNane ja e hokAyaMtra uttara dekhADe ! nahIM to hokAyaMtra haMmezA uttaramAM ja laI jAya, e eno svabhAva ! hokAyaMtra bagaDI jAya pachI kyA kare ? ane potAne dhruvanA tArA jotAM AvaDatA nathI ! A badhAM bhaya signalo jANavA ja paDaze ne ? ema ne ema te kaMI cAlatuM haze ? praznakartA : nA, moTAmAM moTAM jokhama che A to. dAdAzrI : ApaghAtI tattva kahevAya. praznakartA : ane pAchuM e AgaLa vadhavA paNa nA de, bIjuM navuM jJAna utpanna thavA paNa nA de. dAdAzrI : thavA ja nA de ne ! badhuM ApaghAta karI nAkhe ne ! je che ne, tene pAchuM pADa pADa kare. praznakartA : khUbI e che ke ApanA zabdo je nIkaLe che, te ekajhekTa' 'ene mahIM aDe che, e roga ukhaDe che, draSTi pherave che, ne aMdara 'ekkekTa' kriyAkArI thatuM dekhAya, bahu vaijJAnika lAge badhuM ! - dAdAzrI : vAta badhI vaijJAnika hoya to ja lokone niveDo Ave ne, nahIM to niveDo ja nA Ave ne ! ''mAraga sAcA mila gayA, chUTa gayA saMdeha." saMdeha chUTI gayA, sAco mArga to maLI gayo. bhUlA paDyA haze to pharI eka mAIla cAlavuM paDaze. bIjuM zuM karavuM paDaze ? paNa jene javuM che tene jaDI Avaze. 'dAdA'ne pUchavuM ke bhUlA paDyA che ke sAce raste che ? eTaluM pUchavuM. 'mAruM jJAna kevuM che" evuM nA pUchavuM. 'bhUlo paDelo chuM ke sAcA raste chuM ?" eTaluM ja pUchavuM. dAdA kahe, 'barobara che rasto" tyAre pachI cAlyA javuM.

Page #226
[8] jAgRti: pUjAvAnI kAmanA jJAtI'tI samajaNe samajaNa ! 'jJAnI puruSa'nI samajaNathI samajaNa meLavavAnI che, "perelala Tu perelala'. nahIM to 'relave lAIna' UDI jaze. 'potAnI' samajaNa to nAkhavAnI ja nathI. mahIM samajaNa che ja nahIM ne ! eka AMkaDAnI the samajaNa nathI. potAnI samajaNa to AmAM calAvavAnI che ja nahIM. potAnAmAM samajaNa ja nathI ne ! kazuM ja samajaNa nathI. jo samajaNa hota ne, to bhagavAna thaI jAta ! praznakartA H loka prazna pUche ane enA khulAsA Ape to emAM vAMdho zo che ? dAdAzrI : praznonA khulAsA e vastu judI che. haju to jAgRti AvavI joIe, haju jAgRti pariNAma pAmavI joIe. pariNAma pAme tyAra pachI, ghaNA TAIma pachI khulAsA ApelA kAmanA. nahIM to khulAso e be-khulAsA thAya ne ApaNuM jJAna 'DAuna' UtarI jAya, buddhigamya thaI jAya. praznonA javAba ApatAM pahelAM to badhuM 'igoIjhama" utarI javuM joIe. badhuM eTale nATakIya 'igoIjhama' paNa UtarI javuM joIe. A to badhAM 'phaMkazana' haju kAcAM che. e 'phaMkazana' pUrAM thayA sivAya syAdvAda 402 AptavANI-9 vANI nIkaLe nahIM. enA karatAM bolIe ja nahIM. kAraNa ke doSa bese. e to jema jema A badhAM pAsAM dabAtAM jAya, buddhi dabAtI jAya, 'igoIjhama' khalAsa thato jAya, tema tema e syAdavAda vANI nIkaLe. praznonI bAbatamAM atyAre paDavuM nahIM. nahIM to kAcuM kapAze. pachI pAchuM pAkuM karavuM hoya to nahIM thAya. kAraNa ke eka phero kesa gUMcAI gayo eTale ! eTale 'igoIjhama'no mahIM rasa nA paDavo joIe, buddhino rasa nA paDavo joIe. emAM pachI buddhino abhAva thavo joIe, 'igoIjhama'no abhAva thavo joIe. ane te paNa abhyAsa thavo joIe tyAre kAmanuM ! tyAM sudhI dhIraja pakaDavI sArI !! pUrNAhuti karavI hoya, to... koI jagyAe kazI vAta karo cho ? vAtacItamAM koI jagyAe paDazo nahIM. kAraNa ke loka to sAMbhaLe, paNa potAnI dazA zI thAya ? lokane to kAne sAMbhaLIne kADhI nAkhavAnuM che ane potAne paNa 'inTaresTa' paDe emAM. kAraNa ke haju 'igoIjhama' che ne, te badhAM mahIM lauM-khauM karatAM taiyAra besI ja rahyA hoya. te dhIme dhIme ene khorAka maLI jAya. haju mahIM A ahaMkAra ne badhuM ochuM thayA sivAya zuM karavA gA gA karo cho ? koIne cAra AnAno phAyado thAya nahIM, ne amathA gA gA karyAno artha nahIM ne ! te ghaDIe zabda te badhAne sArA lAge. loka kahe ya kharA ke, "bahu sArI vAta che, bahu sArI vAta che.' paNa tyAM to potAne 'igoIjhama' vadhI jAya ane pelA lokone to kAma kazuM ya lAgyuM nA hoya. khAlI upara sugaMdhI AvI paDe eTaluM ja ! moDhAmAM jalebI peThIye nahIM ne sugaMdhI AvI eTaluM ja ! kAcuM rAkhavuM hoya to pelo rasto saraLa che, mIThAze ya sArI paDaze. paNa pote ja saheja kAco paDene, to e ahaMkAra ne badhA mahIM besI ja rahyA hoya tarApa mArIne, ke kyAre khorAka maLI jAya. mahIM ahaMkAra khorAka khoLato ja hoya. e to darekane ya pelo ahaMkAra to besI rahelo

Page #227
AptavANI-9 403 ja hoya. ahaMkAra caDhI besene, to pachI to dalAlI ekalI nA khoLe. atyAre to dalAlI khoLe che, paNa pachI to AkhI mUDI ane tamane potAne hau khAI jAya ! e to enI meLe mahIM che ja. eTale jANyA karavuM ke e ahaMkAranI hAjarI che, tyAM sudhI bIjA kazA bhAgamAM paDazo nahIM. ahaMkArane "skopa" maLe evo rasto Apazo nahIM. 44 AptavANI-9 viSayano vicAra paNa utpanna thAya che tyAM sudhI paugalika IcchAo sAcI che ane tyAM sudhI badho bhArelo agni che. mATe cetatA rahejo. A to bahu bhAre, gADuM UMdhuM nAkhI de, ne kayAMnuM kayAMya jatuM rahe. A jAgRti jatI rahe, paNa A samakti hI jatuM rahe. e ahaMkAra pachI caDhI bese, ne badhA ya caDhI bese. tethI bhagavAne kaheluM ke upazama thayelA guNa, mATe avazya paDe. - praznakartA : Ape bAramA guNa sthAnakamAM besADyA pachI paDe nahIM ne ? - ApaNA jJAnano eka vALa jeTaluM kahevA jAya to loko tUTI paDe. lokoe AvI zAMti joI nathI, AvuM sAMbhaLyuM nathI, eTale tUTI paDe ne ! ane pelo ahaMkAra mahIM beTho beTho hasyA kare, 'hA, cAlo, ApaNo khorAka maLyo " anAdithI khoLato hoya ! pUrNAhuti karavI che ke adhUruM rAkhavuM che ? kAcuM rAkhavuM che ? pUruM karavuM hoya to koI jagyAe kAcA nA paDazo. koI pUche ne, to ye kAcA nA paDazo. upazama, e bhArelo agni ja ! paheluM buddhigamya Avaze ane te yu 'jJAnI puruSa' pAse baha sAMbhaLa sAMbhaLa karIe tyAre Ave. e paNa dhIme dhIme 'sTaDI' karato jAya tyAre Ave, to kAmanuM. jene jAgRti vadhI jAya, tene amAre bahu cetavavo paDe. paNa jo kadI have AjJAmAM rahene, to enI 'sepha sAIDa' UtarI jAya. paNa 'sepha sAIDa' UtaravuM bahu agharI che vastu. have potAne ahaMkAra dekhAya, te ja ATalI vaLI sArI e jAgRti. nahIM to ahaMkAra ekalo ja nA dekhAya, bIjuM badhuM ja dekhAya. je caDhI besavAno e ekalo ja nA dekhAya. buddhi kSaya thavI joIe. pachI ahaMkAra kSaya thavo joIe. pachI bIjI badhI paugalika icchAo kSaya thavI joIe. atyAre to mahIM e icchAo nA dekhAya, paNa mahIM upazama thayelI hoya. je mahIM aMdarakhAne dabAI rahelI che, e badhI kSaya thavI joIe. atyAre e badhI icchAonI potAne khabara nA paDe. paNa jyAM sudhI viSayano vicAra Ave che tyAM sudhI paulika icchA che, ema khAtarI thaI gaI. mahIM dAdAzrI : nA, paDe nahIM. eTale paDavAnuM zuM che ? vyavahAramAM paDavAnuM hoya ne ! bAramuM to nizcayanuM che ane vyavahAra haju agiyAramAmAM AvatAM ja paDI jAya pachI. vyavahAra ekadama agiyAramAmAM Ave, ne pharI paDI jAya. eTale agiyAramuM guThANuM vyavahAranuM che, upazama !! eTale kSaya nathI thayuM tyAM sudhI cAle nahIM. badho vyavahAra kSaya thayA vagara kazuM cAlaze nahIM. are, navamuM ja nA oLaMge ne ! jyAM sudhI viSayano vicAra Ave che ne, tyAM sudhI navamuM guMThANuM AvuM thAya nahIM. eTale jo kadI bolavA jAya to dazA besI jAya. jokhamadArI che, mahAna jokhamadArI ! kAraNa ke roga badhA UbhA che, haju upazama thayelA che, e kSaya nathI thayelA. e kSaya thavAM paDaze. upazama thayelA eTale bhArelo agni kahevAya. jyAre bhaDako karI nAkhe e kahevAya nahIM. "potA' para pakSapAta, svasatA AvarAya ! haju to potAnI para potAne pakSapAta che, Akho ya pakSapAta che. potAnI para pakSapAta nA rahe to potAnI bhUla jaDe ! pakSapAta samajAyuM? che tethI have 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e bhAna to nathI rahetuM, paNa jyAre karmanA udaya Ave tyAre 'pote' udaya svarUpa thaI jAya che ! ane udaya svarUpa thayo ke jAgRti para AvaraNa Ave ne potAnI bhUla nA dekhAya. paNa satsaMgamAM Ava Ava kare eTale bhUmikA DhIlI thAya ne upayoga khUMpe.

Page #228
405 AptavANI-9 satsaMga ocho hoya to upayoga AvarAyA kare. gharamAM cora pese ne, to mahIM AtmA che to tarata ja samajAya evuM che. paNa kema nathI samajAtuM ? "ApaNe tyAM to kazuM thAya nahIM" evo pakSapAta che, tethI e bAjunuM AvaraNa che ane tethI A badhuM jANavA nA de. nahIM to tarata samajAya evuM che. 'konI vIMTI sarasa che ?" pUche to tarata AMgaLI UMcI karaze. kAraNa ke 'potAnI vIMTI sArI che" evo pakSapAta che ! evo A potA para potAne pakSapAta che, eTale mUcchita karyA vagara rahe nahIM. ane enI potAne khabara ja nA paDavA de ne ! "huM caMdubhAI chuM' e bhAna to ame toDI ApyuM che, ne Apelo AtmAya potAne rahe che. paNa jyAre udayanA phera caDhe che tyAre khabara nA paDe ke 'mArI zI bhUla thAya che ? kyAM bhUla thAya che ?!' naryuM AkhuM ye bhUlanuM ja taMtra che ne ! tene laIne to potAnI sattA AvarAyelI paDI che. AtmA to Apyo che, paNa sattA AkhIye AvarAyelI paDI che ! ne tene laIne vacanabaLa-manobaLa paNa khIlatuM nathI. nahIM to vacanabaLa te kevuM khIle !! hajI to viSaya para pakSapAta che, kapaTa para pakSapAta che, ahaMkAra para pakSapAta che. mATe upayoga jAgRti rAkho, satsaMgano dhakko rAkho. to e badhI vyavahAranI bhUlo dekhAya, ne upayoga badhe phare. A satsaMgamAM nA Ave to zuM thAya ? upayoga aTakI jAya. enuM zuM kAraNa ? pakSapAta ! ne te potAne ya khabara nA paDe. jAgRti e vastu "jJAna" nathI. jAgRti to, e jAgRti che. 'jJAna' vastu judI che. jAgRti to, UMghamAMthI jAgavuM, enuM nAma jAgRti. have UMgha nA rahI kahevAya ! 'jJAna' to bahu moTI vastu che. A bIje badhe upazama thayeluM hoya ne, te kSaya thAya tyAra pachI "jJAna' utpanna thAya. kSayopazama thayeluM eTale ahaMkAra che kharo, paNa atyAre dekhAto nathI. agni che paNa upara bhArelo che. eTale ApaNane upara dekhAya nahIM. ApaNe ema ja jANIe ke rAkhoDI che. paNa jarAka havA Avaze ke khabara paDI jaze, bhaDako thaze. 406 AptavANI-9 tyAre "jAgRti' pariName "jJAta'mAM ! jAgRti vadhAryA karajo to lAbhadAyI thaze. jAgRti vadhelI hoya ne, to bIjAM karma baMdhAya nahIM. jAgRtine karma baMdhana nA hoya, eTale mahIM ekadama cokhkhuM thaI jAya. tyAM sudhImAM pelo "igoIjhama" ogaLyA kare. mAnamAM kapaTa nathI. mAnamAM kapaTa hota to jAgRti ja utpanna nA thAya. kapaTa eTale paDado ! jemAM paDado e na dekhAya, temAM e aMdha hoya. praznakartA: kapaTa eTale zuM? dAdAzrI : vastune DhAMkavA phare. A badhuM kapaTa ja kahevAya ne ! mahIM UMdhuM A kapaTe ja karAvaDAvyuM ne badhe. ahaMkAra ne kapaTa beu bheguM thAya tyAre thAya ne AvuM! UMdhe raste koNa laI jAya ? krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha. e badhAM cAreva bhegA thAya tyAre UMdhe raste laI jAya. mULa badhuM ahaMkAranuM. ane mahIM lobha zeno ? mahIM ene svAda hoya. jAgRti jJAnamAM pariNAma pAme, te pahelAM to kapaTano eka aMza nA rahevo joIe. koI paNa prakAranA kapaTano aMza nA rahevo joIe, viSayano aMza nA rahevo joIe. eTale viSayano vicAra paNa nA Avavo joIe. eTale koNa koNa javuM joIe ? ahaMkAra kSaya thavo joIe. buddhi kSaya thavI joIe, e upazama thayelI nA cAle. badhA karmo kSaya thAya tyAre krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha kSaya thAya. A to badhA guNo lAyaka thaze tyAre syAdavAda vANI nIkaLe. tyAM sudhI to jokhamadArI che. bahu ja jokhamadArI, atyaMta jokhamadArI !! "jAgRti', tyAM kaSAyo "jame' nahIM ! A krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhanI zaktio mahIM besI rahelI hoya. te 'kyAre dAdAne choDe ane vaLagI paDuM' kaheze. e game te raste ADuM avaLuM dekhADIne paNa A choDAvavA taiyAra thAya. kAraNa ke e jyAM sudhI UbhA rahelA che, haju sAbUta che tyAM sudhI nirvaza thAya nahIM. tyAM sudhI bolavA

Page #229
AptavANI-9 407 jevuM nathI. e vANI to vA-pANI thaI jaze. mATe e bolavA jevuM nathI. mIThAza maLe, e khorAka maLyo kahevAya. krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhane khorAka maLe. pachI to pelI bAju josabaMdha zakti vApare ! A to khorAka nahIM Apelo, te thoDA dahADA bhUkhyA rahyA hatA ne, tene lIdhe nirbaLa thaI gayelA. traNa varSa sudhI khorAkanA Apyo hoya ane e bhUkhyA rahe to traNa varSa pachI jatA rahe. paNa ApaNA loko mahIM thoDuMka thoDuMka Ape che. bahu dayALu che ne, lAgaNIvALA bahu ne ! kaheze, 'lyo, dALa-bhAta ne A thoDuM lyo. are, dAdAnI prasAdI to lo.' eTale thoDo thoDo khorAka Ape che. jo bilakula bhUkhyA rAkhavAmAM Ave to traNa varSathI AgaLa Take nahIM. e gayA eTale sarvasva badhuM sAmrAjya ApaNA hAthamAM AvyuM. evI khabara paDe che ke pelA kaSAyo jamI jAya che evuM ? khabara paDe ke A koNa jamI gayuM ? kaSAyo AvuM badhuM jamI jAya. mahinAmAM be vakhata ja khAvAnuM maLyuM, to pAchAM hatA tevAM ne tevAM majabUta thaI jAya. amArI pAse to koI dahADo ya jamI nathI gayuM. tyAra pachI jatA rahelA ne ! pharI ame nakkI karyuM hoya ke "emane jamADavA nathI' eTale jame nahIM. jAgRti joIe. haju pelA kapAya badhA besI rahyA che, jatA rahyA nathI. tyAre meM mAryA ya nathI. huM kaMI hiMsaka chuM ja nahIM. eTale e jatA rahyA ke nathI. tema ApaNe bhUkhe mAravA che, evuM che ya nahIM. e "jJAnI puruSa'nA tApathI cheTA jatAM rahe, temAM ApaNe zuM karIe ? ApaNe jANI-joIne nA bolAvIe pachI. tamArI pAse koI dahADo jamavA Ave che ? praznakartA : Ave, dAdA. dAdAzrI : Aje kAcuM khavaDAvo, to kAle pAkuM khAI jAya. mATe emanI pAse khavaDAvavAno vyavahAra ja nA rAkhavo, jamADavAno vyavahAra ja nahIM. bAkI loka badhAya jamADe, krodhane jamADe, mAnane jamADe. praznakartA : A badho khorAka kaSAyo ja khaI jAya, to zuM karavuM ? 408 AptavANI-9 - dAdAzrI : e to jamI jAya. chatAM 'dAdAjI" mAthe che, kRpAthI badhuM cokhkhuM thAya evuM che. jAte A satsaMgamAMthI AghApAchA thAva to tarata coMTI paDaze badhuM. ApaNe to 'dAdAjIno Azaro choDavo nahIM, paga choDavA nahIM ! A to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha badhAMya dabAyelAM che. e ya haju barobara lAgamAM Ave ne, to bhabhUkI UThe. mATe pUruM karavuM hoya to A rasto ke badhA kSaya thavAM joIe. upazama ane kSAyaka, A be zabdo samajI lejo. A badhI vaMzAvaLI ochI thaI jaze tyAre kAma thaze. A vaMzAvaLI to ochI karavI e vikaTa kAma che. anaMta avatArano mAla badho ! A badhA guNo upazama thaI gayelA che. have emAMthI keTalAka phuTI nIkaLe. ane keTalAka Avate bhava phUTaze, teno vAMdho nathI. Avato bhava to ApaNe jANe ke paddhatisarano bhava che, paNa ahIM phUTI nIkaLe to veSa thaI paDe. ahIM to pachI, ahIMthI khasavA ja nA de ! "kSAyaka', pachI seksAIDa ! pUrNAhuti sivAya A vAta hAthamAM lezo nahIM. kAraNa ke mahIM badhA doSo upazama thaIne besI rahelA hoya ane zI rIte bolAya ? haju 'sarTiphAIDa' thayA nathI tame. A to haju, phakta tamane ciMtA nA thAya ne tamAro dhIme dhIme mokSamArga kapAya che. paNa bolavA mATe to 'jJAnI puruSa' 'sarTiphAIDa' kahetA hoya, to bolavuM. | mahIM badhA doSo taiyAra ja che, nahIM to ame ja nA kahIe, pahele dahADe ja, ke 'have tame vAta karo, satsaMga karo, ame nirAMte besI rahIe." ame to evuM khoLIe ja chIe, bAkI badhA guNa kSAyaka thaze, tyAre enI meLe badhuM utpanna thaze. ApaNe tyAM sudhI kazI utAvaLa nA karavI. mIThuM lAgyuM, tyAM paDe mAra ! jAgRti kone kahevAya ke UMghato nathI, ene jAgRti kahevAya.

Page #230
410 AptavANI-9 409 jAgRti hoya to cora pesI nA jAya. praznakartA: to A badhA doSo paNa potAnA dekhAvA joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : dekhAya ne ! praznakartA : ahaMkAra paNa dekhAvo joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : e ya dekhAya che ne ! praznakartA : to pachI ene paDI javAnuM zuM kAraNa hoya ? dAdAzrI : e ahaMkAra ja khorAka laI jAya A badho. A garvarasa karAve che ne, te ahaMkAra ja A badhuM karAvaDAve ApaNI pAse, ke 'A to bahu sAruM che, bahu sAruM che, lokone gamyuM.' praznakartA : A ahaMkArano rasa je vadhAre cAkhI jAya, ene lIdhe pAchuM AvuM paDavAnuM thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hAsto ne ! A to badhI mIThAza Ave. jema A loka kahe che ne, 'A meM karyuM. te karyAno garva utpanna thAya che. kamAyo tyAM sudhI garvarasa utpanna thAya che ane khoTa jAya tyAre zuM kahe che ? 'bhagavAne karyuM. mera gAMDiyA, kamAvavAno thayo tyAre 'meM karyuM" kaheto hato. A garvarasa utpanna thAya, te ghaDIe mIThAza lAge. jyAM mIThuM lAge ne, tyAM jANavuM ke A mAra paDavAno thayo. khArA-mIThAno bheda nA hoya tyAre jANavuM ke jJAna che. khArAmIThAno bheda jene nahIM hoya tyAre jANavuM ke jJAna che ! 'vizeSatA', tyAM viSa ! praznonA khulAsA bolAya nahIM, eka akSare ya bolAya nahIM. phakta sahejA saheja vAtacIta thAya. bAkI, bIjAmAM ne ApaNAmAM phera nA mAnavo. A to vizeSatA dekhADavA mATe bole. ane e ja pelA kaSAya badhA karAve che ne ! amAruM ekuMya vAkya vizeSa bhAvavALuM nA hoya. kudaratI rIte ja nIkaLyA kare. kAraNa ke amArI 'rekarDa' hoya ne ! tamArI AptavANI-9 vANI 'rekarDa' thAya pachI vAMdho nahIM. 'ka' thAya eTale pachI thaI rahyuM. hajI 'rekarDa" thatI nathI, nahIM ?! - koI be jaNa vAta karatA hoya ne, to DahApaNa karavAnuM mana thAya. ane "jJAna" tenuM nAma nA kahevAya. A caDesavALI vastu nathI. caDasa nA hovI joIe. caDasavALI badhI saMsArI vastuo ! samakti thakI kSAyaka bhaNI ! jema jema jAgRti vadhatI jAya, tema tema upazama thayelA guNo kSaya thatAM jAya. e jAgRtino phAyado uThAvavAno che. A bahAranA karmo upazama thayelAM hoya, ene sAmAyiko karIne kSaya thAya. paNa to ya 'TesTeDa' nA thAya tyAM sudhI vaLe nahIM. saMsAramAM 'TesTiMga ekjhAminezana' AvavI joIe. bAkI, jAgRti to enuM nAma kahevAya ke A dekhAya, te dekhAya, badhuM dekhAya. A 'dAdA' ja Akho dahADo yAda rahyA kare. ane "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' - e badhuM 'dAdA'ne lIdhe ja che, e kRpA phaLa kahevAya. jayAre A jAgRti vastu e judI kahevAya. bAkI, AmAM utAvaLa karavA jevI vastu nathI. je jJAna tame pAmyA ne, te lAkha avatAre ya koI nA pAme. A to UtAvaLiyuM maLe che, te raghavAyo thaI jAya. A raghavAyA thavAnI 'lAIna' ja hoya. A to sthiratAnI 'lAIna' che ! 'zuddhAtmA chuM' lakSa bese, ene bahu moTAmAM moTI vastu bhagavAne kahI che. tyAM kramika mArgamAM to zabdanI pratIti hoya, tenI bahu kiMmata che. zuddhAtmAnA je guNa che e guNa upara pratIti bese ke "A huM chuM." enI bahu moTI kiMmata gaNI che, ene samakita kahyuM che, te ya pAchI zabdanI pratIti. ane tamAre to 'vastu'nI pratIti thaI, svAbhAvika pratIti che eTale kSAyaka pratIti kahevAya ! A jJAna bahu kAma karanAruM che. tyAM khUba khUba cetIne cAlavuM ! eTale pUrNa kAma karI levuM hoya to cetatA rahejo. koI jagyAe

Page #231
411 AptavANI-9 vAtacIta banatAM sudhI karavI nahIM. lokone A jJAna samajAvavA nA jazo. nahIM to oLanuM thaI jaze DoLa ! eka zabda vItarAganI vANI bolavI ne, e to bahu moTAmAM moTI muzkelI ! loka to coMTI paDe, lokane zuM ? loka to jANe ke ApaNane kaMIka mAla maLaze. kaMIka maLe eTalA mATe loka coMTI paDe ke nA coMTI paDe ? paNa lokone kahI devuM ke, 'mAruM AmAM kAma nahIM.' akSare ya bolAya nahIM. nahIM to emAM potAne oLanuM thaI jAya DoLa ! praznakartA : paNa je anubhava thayA hoya, e kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : anubhava hoya nahIM. A to vAta badhI nIkaLe, e zabdo amArA kahelA nIkaLe. te zabdo UgI nIkaLe badhA. bAkI, anubhava vastu to dhIme dhIme thAya. eTale AkhuM vItarAga vijJAna hAjara thavuM joIe. vijJAnano aMza koIne khabara che nahIM. A to amArI vANI peThelI e nIkaLe che. ane koIka moTo tIsmArakhAM Ave ne, to toDI ja pADe, traNa ja zabdamAM toDI pADe. buddhigamya cAle nahIM ne ! buddhigamya to jagatanI pAse nathI ? are, moTAM moTAM zAstronA zAstro mukhapAThavALA che. e eka zabda bole to gUMcAI jazo. A to amAruM ApeluM 'jJAna' pariNAma pAmyuM, to pariNAma pAmIne ene pharI uge pAchuM A. amAruM ApeluM bIja rUpe paDyuM hoya, te pharI Uge. tyAre 'dAdAjI ema kahetA hatA' ema vAta karo. paNa je Ama vANI sUre, te thoDA dahADA to ema lAgaze ke A 'dAdAjI' jevuM ja bolI rahyA che. pachI kaye gAma laI jaze ! thoDA dahADA pachI pachADe, e to choDe nahIM ne !! bALaka banavuM, 'jJAtI'tAM ! bIjA koIka Ama suMvALuM batADe ne, ke 'tame bahu sarasa bolyA, tame to bahu sarasa bolyA." tyAre kahevuM ke, 'huM to bALaka chuM dAdAno.' 412 AptavANI-9 eTaluM ja cetavAnuM. bIjI bhAMjagaDamAM nahIM UtaravAnuM. e amArA zabdo pacI ne Uge tyAre vANI nIkaLaze. e vAta judI che. paNa e zabda zabda hovo joIe. bAkI, kapoLa kalpita nA bolAya. atyAre ApaNe utAvaLe zuM che ? 'dAdA'nA bALaka rahevuM che ke moTA thavuM che ? praznakartA : dAdAnA bALaka rahevuM che. dAdAzrI : basa. e bALaka rahevAmAM majhA che. 'sephasAIDa" kharI ne jokhamadArI nahIM. 'dAdA'ne UMcakavo paDe. ane e kaheze, 'huM moTo thayo." tyAre kahIe, 'hA, to pharavA jA bahAra.' ame kahIe ke "moTo nA thaIza.' evI pahelI samajaNa pADIe. chatAM ya e kahe ke, "nA, mAre moTA thavuM che.' to thavA daIe. 'thA tyAre. TapalAM vAgaze eTale pAcho Avaze." ApaNuM jJAna evuM che ke TapaluM mAryA vagara rahe nahIM. "ApaNe" to ema kahevuM ke "he caMdubhAI, ame tamane jANIe chIe ke tame kevA cho. mATe amane phasAvazo nahIM." evI 'ApaNe vAtacIta karIe. 'tamane AvaData Ave to ame tamArI joDe chIe, paNa amane phasAvyA to AvI banyuM jANajo', kahIe. Ama karatAM karatAM ja moTA thayelAM ne ! bAbo caDhe, paDe, Ubho thAya ema karatAM karatAM paheluM gADI dhakele, ema karato karato cAlato thAya ne ! eTale e rIte calAya ne !! rasto ja e che ne !!!! mATe jo pUrNa kAma karavuM hoya ne, to eka ja vAta yAda rAkhavI ke koI pUche to kahIe, 'huM nA jANuM, dAdAjI pAse jAva." pUrNatA vitA pachADe 'upadeza' ! jayAM sudhI pUrNAhuti nA thAya tyAM sudhI bolavAnI vAtamAM paDazo nahIM. e paDavA jevI vastu nathI. hA, ApaNe koIne eTaluM kahI zakIe ke, 'tyAM AgaLa satsaMga sAro che. Ama che, tema che, tyAM AgaLa jAva." ATalI vAtacIta karavI. upadeza tarIke nA apAya. e upadeza ApavA jevI vastu hoya. A 'akrama vijJAna' che.

Page #232
AptavANI-9 413 A 'dAdA'nuM jJAna je pAmyA che, e jJAnathI mAla nIkaLe ne, e sAMbhaLIne to jagata badhuM dharI de. ane dharI de eTale zuM thAya ? lapaTAyo pachI ! badhA pelAM upazama thayelAM ne, te phaTAphaTa jAgI uThe. AkarSaNavALI vANI che A. A jJAna AkarSaka che. mATe mauna rahevuM. jo pUruM hita karavuM hoya to mauna rahevuM. ane dukAna kADhavI hoya to bolavAnI chUTa che ane dukAna cAlavAnI ye nathI. dukAna kADhazo to ye nahIM cAle, UDI jaze. kAraNa ke 'ApeluM jJAna' che ne, te UDI jatAM vAra nahIM lAge. dukAna to pelA kramika mArgamAM cAle. be avatAra, pAMca avatAra ke dasa avatAra cAle ne pachI e ya UDI jAya. dukAna kADhavI eTale siddhi vecavI. AvelI siddhine vecavA mAMDI, durupayoga karyo ! gozALo je hato ne, e to pahelAM mahAvIra bhagavAnano ziSya hato, khAsa, 'speziyala' ziSya. paNa chevaTe e sAmo thaIne Ubho rahyo. gozALo mahAvIra bhagavAna pAse bahu vakhata rahyo. pachI ene ema lAgyuM ke mane A badhuM jJAna samajAI gayuM, eTale bhagavAnathI chUTo paDIne kahe che ke huM tIrthakara chuM, e tIrthaMkara nathI.' ane keTalIka vakhata evuM ye bolato hato ke, "e ya tIrthaMkara che ne huM ya tIrthaMkara chuM.' have e roga peTho, pachI zI dazA thAya enI ?! - have mahAvIra bhagavAna pAse hato, to ya tyAM pAMsaro nA rahyo. to amArI pAse beThelo zI rIte pAMsaro rahe ? jo kAcuM kapAya to zI dazA thAya ? ane te to cothA ArAnI vAta hatI. A to pAMcamo Aro, anaMta avatAra kharAba karI nAkhe. anAdithI AvAM ja mAra khAdhA che ke, lokoe ! AnA A ja mAra khA khA karyA che. jarAka svAda maLI gayo ke, caDhyo ja che upara (!) 414 AptavANI-9 je je kare ne, eTale cAnI peTha Teva paDI jAya. pachI jyAre nA maLe ne, tyAre mUMjhAya. tyAra pachI banAvaTa karIne ya paNa je' je' karAvaDAve. eTale jokhama che, cetatA rahejo. zenI bhIkha che ? pUjAvAnI bhIkha. ane Ama je je kare eTale khuza. alyA, A to narka javAnI nizAnIo ! A to bahu ja jokhamadArI. evI Teva paDelI hoya, te jAya nahIM. praznakartA : potAne pUjAvAnI kAmanA che ke nahIM, enI potAne kevI rIte khabara paDe ? dAdAzrI : badhuM ya potAne khabara paDe. ene zuM bhAve che te khabara paDe. AIsakrIma bhAve che e nathI khabara paDatI ? mahIM tharmomiTara che AtmA, te badhuM khabara paDe. AjanA jIvo lAlacu bahu che. te potAnuM ja UbhuM kare che badhe Thera Thera, pUjAvAnuM badhuM UbhuM kare che. ane pUjAvAvALA pachI navuM dhAraNa karI zakatA nathI sAcI vAta. jyAM ne tyAM loko dukAna mAMDIne besI gayA. ane pUjAvAnI kAmanA aMdara bharAI rahelI hoya ke kema karIne mane je' je' kare. to ene galagaliyAM thAya. je je kare eTale galagaliyAM thAya, evI majhA (!) Ave kharekharI !! UMdho rasto che e badho. pUjAvAnI kAmanA, enA jevo bhayaMkara koI roga nathI. moTAmAM moTo roga hoya to pUjAvAnI kAmanA ! kone pUjavAno hoya ? AtmA to pUjya ja hoya. dehane pUjavAno rahyo ja kyAM pachI ?! paNa pUjAvAnI icchAo-lAlaco che A badhI. dehane pUjAvIne zuM kADhavAnuM ? je dehane bALI melavAno, ene pUjAvIne zuM kADhavAnuM ? paNa e lAlaca evI ke "mane puje'. eTale A pUjAvAnI lAlasAo che. nahIM to mokSa kaMI agharo nathI. A dAnato hoya che ne, te agharI che. evI icchA thAya to ya bhayaMkara guno che. evI icchA koI dahADo thayelI ? thoDI mahIM galIpacI thAya ? A to ame cetavIe. nA cetavIe to pachI paDI jAya ne ! sArI jagyA para AvyA pachI paDI apUjayatA pUjApAmAM patata ! pUjAvAnI kAmanA UbhI thAya che kharI ? kahejo, huM dabAvI ApIza. hA, e mULiyuM kApI nAkhIe eTale pachI baMdha thaI jAya. e kAmanA bahu jokhama che. kAmanA UbhI thatI nathI ne ? ko'ka dahADo UbhI thavA pharaze, ke ! mATe jokhama che evuM mAnIne cAlajo. kAraNa ke loko

Page #233
AptavANI-9 415 jAya to pachI nakAmo thAya, 'yujhalesa' thAya ane vAge ya bahu. nIce hoya ne paDe to vAge nahIM bahu. bahu UMce doDyo hoya upara, te paDe to vAge bahu. eTale jyAM cho tyAM rahejo, nIce nA utarazo pAchAM. ne svataMtra zabda kazuM lAvazo nahIM. ahIMthI laI jaIne te ja zabda vAparajo; svataMtra navo mUkazo nahIM. navuM sTezane ya bAMdhazo nahIM. ke bAMdhyuM che ? pAyA khodayA nathI ? nathI bAMdhyuM ? cetavaNI to hovI joIe ne ! nahIM to kyAMya jaIne UbhAM rahezo ! haju to mArga bahu judI jAtano che A. ane keTalI badhI Ama lobhAmaNI jagyAo Ave che ! koI dahADo joI nA hoya evI lobhAmaNI jagyAo Ave che. te moTA moTA chetarAyA tyAM tamAruM zuM gajuM ? eTale A 'dAdA bhagavAna'nA mArgathI cAlo barAbara. heya ! 'kliyara roDa pharsTa kalAsa' !! jokhama nahIM, kazuM nahIM ! mokSamArgatA bhayasthAno mATe mokSamArgane bAdhaka AvyuM eTale choDI devAnuM ane cAlo pAchA. e dhyeya para kahevAya ne ! potAno dhyeya cUke nahIM, game tevAM kaThaNa prasaMgomAM paNa potAno dhyeya cUke nahIM evuM hovuM joIe. tamAre dhyeya pramANe koI dahADo cAle ke ? avaLuM nahIM kazuM ? e to sahaja thaI gayeluM, nahIM ? praznakartA : eTale mahIM 'henDala' mAravAnuM cAlu rAkhavuM paDe. dAdAzrI : cAlu rAkhavuM paDe ? paNa e mahIMvALA mAne kharAM ? tarata ja ? praznakartA : tarata ja. dAdAzrI : tarata ? vAra ja nahIM ? e sAruM. jeTaluM mAne eTaluM chUTA thayAnI nizAnI. eTalA enAthI ApaNe chUTA ja chIe e nizAnI. potAne lAMca kazI che nahIM. lAMca hoya tyAre e vAta mAne nahIM. enI pAse 'pote' lAMca khAto hoya to e ApaNI vAta mAne nahIM pachI. 'pote' svAda laI Ave, pachI 'pelA' nA mAne. AptavANI-9 A vyavahAra to pelI bAju ja laI jAya ne ! anAdithI eka ArAdhelo mArga e ja ne !! vyavahAra to haMmezAM e bAjunuM TevAyelo ja hoya ne ! eTale e bAju jAya toya ApaNe ApaNA dhyeya pramANe hAMkavAnuM. baLada to jUno rasto dekhe to e raste ja cAlyA kare. ApaNe have ApaNA raste dhyeya pramANe javAnuM. A raste nahIM, A bIje raste javAnuM. 'Ama gleMDa' kahIe. 416 eTale pote lAMca nA le to pelAM kahyA pramANe tarata ja phare. paNa lAMca le to e pachI mAra khavaDAve, badhI bAbatamAM mAra khavaDAve. eTale dhyeyamAM pAchuM nahIM paDavuM joIe. praznakartA : e lAMca kevI hoya ? dAdAzrI : cAkhI Ave. ane cAkhatI vakhate pAchuM mIThuM lAgyuM hoya ne, te bese tyAM AgaLa. 'TesTa' karI Avyo eTale pachI pharI thoDuMka ekAda-be boTala pI Ave. A badhI cora dAnata kahevAya. dhyeya para javuM che e ane cora dAnata, e be sAthe kema karIne rahI zake ? dAnata cokkasa rAkhavI joIe, koI paNa lAMca-rUzvata sivAya. A to e mastI cAkhavAnI Teva hoya che, eTale Ama tyAM besIne jarA e mastInA AnaMdamAM rahe. praznakartA : eTale prakRtinI mastI ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjI zI ? e emAM ja TevAyelo che ne ! eTale 'ApaNe' kahIe ke, 'nA, amAre to have Ama javAnuM che. mAre mastI nathI joItI. amArA dhyeya pramANe cAlavAnuM che.' A prakRtinI mastIo to bhUlabhUlAmaNImAM laI jAya. dhyeya toDAvaDAve e ApaNA duzmana. ApaNo dhyeya nukasAna karAve e kema poSAya ?! nahIM to brahmacarya pALavuM hoya ane abrahmacaryanAM vicAra karavA, enA jevuM thAya. vicAramAM mIThAza to Ave, paNa zuM thAya ? e bhayaMkara guno che ne ! pachI potAnAM dhyeyamAM 'TI.bI.' ja thAya ne ! saDo ja pesavA mAMDe ne !!

Page #234
AptavANI-9 417 ahIM to potAnuM mana eTaluM majabUta karI levAnuM che ne, ke A bhavamAM je thAya, bhale deha jAya, paNa A bhavamAM kaMIka 'kAga' karI lauM evuM nakkI karI rAkhavuM joIe. eTale enI meLe kAma thaze ja. ApaNe ApaNuM nakkI karI rAkhavuM joIe. ApaNI DhIlAza nA rAkhavI. AvuM prApta hoya tyAre DhIlAza nA rAkhavI. pachI je thAya te kharuM. enI evI bhAMjagaDa nahIM rAkhavAnI ne nA thayuM enI ve bahu bhAMjagaDa nahIM rAkhavAnI. e to badhuM maLI Ave. potAnI pAse adhikAra zo che ? bhAva. ke ATaluM mAre karI levuM che. nizcaya, e potAno adhikAra vAparavo. ane bIjo bahArano roga pesI nA jAya ke 'lAva, huM pAMca jaNane satsaMga saMbhaLAvuM ke evuM tevuM." enI kALajI rAkhavAnI. nahIM to e ya pAchA bIjA navI jAtanA roga pesI jAya ane kaMInuM kaMI raste caDhI jAya, to pachI zuM thAya ? koI bacAvanAra maLe nahIM. mATe ApaNe mokSe javuM hoya to A 'vAta karavAmAM paDazo nahIM. kazuM pUche to kahevuM ke 'huM nA jANuM.' A to ame A bhayasthAno badhAM batADI daIe. bhayasthAno nA batAvIe ne, to UMdhuM thaI jAya. A badhA puNyazALI hoya che ne, vAte ya pragaTa thaI ne ! nahIM to vAta zI rIte khabara paDe ? ne huM AmAM kyAM UMDo UtaravA jAuM ?! A to vAta nIkaLI tyAre nIkaLI, nahIM to koNa jANatuM hatuM ke AvuM badhuM cAlatuM haze ! gupta veze cAlI javuM! jevuM banyuM hoya te badhuM amane kahI de, tyAMthI AlocanA kahevAya. je banyuM, eno vAMdho nathI. e to badhuM kSamA ja hoya. paNa jevuM banyuM evuM kahI de, tyArathI AlocanA kahevAya. eTale e rastethI pAcho pharI gayo. pachI ame vALI laIe. A to jokhamadArIvALo rasto che, mATe cetajo. bahu jokhama che. eka akSare ya bolazo nahIM. ane bolavuM hoya to ya amane kahejo, huM kahIza ke "bolo have tame.' bAkI bahu jokhama, eka akSare ya ya bolavuM hoya to bahu jokhama kahevAya. jagatanuM kalyANa thavAnuM haze tyAre thaze, tamane enI meLe kudarata 418 AptavANI-9 nimitta taiyAra kare tyAra pachI karajo ne ! tame taiyAra thavA jazo nahIM. taiyAra thavA jevI cIja nathI e !! tamArI jo siddhio vecavA mAMDazo, to jagata zuM nahIM Ape ? paNa tamArI manuSyarUpI mUDI khalAsa ! are, khalAsa nahIM, UlaTI manuSyarUpI mUDI jatI raheze ne narkanA adhikArI thaI jAya. ApaNo to mokSamArga che, tyAM to gupta veze cAlI javAnuM che. 'jJAtI' saMgAthe pAMsarasa cAlIe ! ApaNo A satsaMga choDazo nahIM. loko Ama zIkhavADe, tema zIkhavADe to ya A satsaMga choDazo nahIM. ahIM Avo eTale bhagavAnanI kRpA utarI eTale pAchuM rAge paDI jaze. ene kaMI vAra lAgatI nathI. eTale AvI badhI to muzkelIo AvavAnI. tethI to ApaNe kahIe chIe ne, "mokSe jatAM vighno aneka prakAranAM hovAthI tenI sAme huM anaMta zaktivALo chuM.' paNa sAmo e ya enI anaMta zaktivALo che ne, ke e mokSe javA ja nA de ! eTale bhagavAne kahyuM ke, "jJAnI puruSa'ne AdhIna thaIne cAlavuM, emanA kahevA pramANe cAlavuM. e gAMDu-gheluM kahe to paNa cAlyA jajo. kAraNa ke vItarAgatA che. potAnI buddhithI nA samajAya to nakkI karavuM ke emanA nava 'ikavezana" samajAya ane eka nA samajAyo to emanI bhUla nA kADhazo ane 'mArI bhUlathI nathI samajAyo' evuM jANajo. kAraNa ke nava samajAyA to dasamo kema nathI samajAto ? eTale emanI bhUla nA kADhazo. e bhUla bhAMgIne beThA che. buddhi to bhUla dekhADe, 'jJAnI puruSa'nI ye bhUla khoLI kADhe. eka avatAranuM maraNa hoya to calAvI levAya, paNa 'jJAnI puruSa'nI virAdhanA kare to lAkho avatAranuM maraNa thAya che. konI virAdhanA, vItarAganI ?! A 'aMbAlAla mULajIbhAIne gALo bhAMDavI hoya to so bhAMDajo, tamane nA phAvatuM hoya to bhAMDa ne ! bAkI, samajyA vagara ja loka guno karI bese. mATe to ApaNe gupta rAkhavuM paDyuM, gupta ja rAkhyuM che !

Page #235
AptavANI--- 420 AptavANI-9 manamAM to ema thAya ke A zI jhaMjhaTa ? eTale ene khaseDI mUkavAnuM mana thAya. paNa pAchuM mahIMthI Ave ke 'paNa e jaze kyAM bicAro ? bIjA kayA davAkhAnAmAM jaze ? bhale gAMDo-ghelo haze, bolatAM ja AvaDe nahIM, viveke ya nahIM, kazuM ja nahIM, evo bhale haze to ya cAlavA do !" praznakartA : A peluM kahe che ke "jatA rahe to sAruM' e kyo bhAga bole che ? ne peluM kahe che ke "A bicArAM kyAM jaze ?" e kyo bhAga bole che ? 419 meM kahyuM che ke A bahu UMcI jagyA upara tamane teDI jauM chuM. tyAMthI gabaDyA ke hADakAno TukaDo ya jaDaze nahIM. mATe kAM to mArI joDe upara Avazo nahIM ane AvavuM hoya to cetIne cAlajo. mokSa saraLa che, eka ja avatArI vijJAna che A. paNa jo ADuM-avaLuM karavuM hoya to upara caDhazo nahIM, amArI joDe Avazo nahIM. evuM badhAne kaheluM ja che. bahu UMco rasto che, uparathI paDyA pachI hADakuM ya nahIM jaDe. chatAM ye upara AvelA pAchA mane kahe che ke "A haju saLI karaze, Ama karaze.' paNa ame tene baMdhana evuM rAkhI mUkyuM hoya ke e paDe nahIM. jema sarakAra reliMgo kare che ne, evuM ame sAdhana rAkhIe. atyAra sudhI koIne paDavA dIdho nathI. aho, kAruNyatA "jJAnI' taNI ! je roga hoya e "jJAnI puruSa' dekhADe, bIjo koI doSa nA dekhADe. kAraNa ke emane pelAno roga maTADavo che. DaoNkaTara dardInA roga vadhAre ke maTADe ? ane ame A kyAM amArA sAru kahIe chIe ? A to tamArA mATe 'speziyalI' ane te ya vItarAgatAthI kahIe chIe. zabda kaThaNa nA hoya to roga nIkaLe nahIM. kaThaNa zabda vagara roga nIkaLe nahIM. roga zenAthI nIkaLe ? kaThaNa zabdo ane vItarAgatA ! zabdo kaThaNa kevAM, te Ama sAMdhA toDI nAkhe evA kaThaNa ane chatAM saMpUrNa vItarAgatA !! A 'dAdA' beThA beThA nirAMte lokone pAMsarA kare, dho dho karyA kare. paNa to ya badhAne kyAM dhovA jauM ? mAruM magaja ja nA rahe pachI. A to kaMI ochuM kAma haze, savArathI sAMja sudhImAM ? keTalI 'phAIlo' AvatI haze ? keTalAMka kahe, 'mArA dhaNIe mane AvuM karyuM !' have A nizALe ya amAre zIkhavavAnI ? praznakartA : A duniyAmAM koI evo kesa nahIM hoya ke e tamArI pAse nahIM Avyo hoya, badhI jAtanA kesa AvyA che. dAdAzrI : zuM kare te pachI ? eka-be jaNane 'meM' nA pADelI tyAre 'mahIM'thI bolyA, 'te kayA davAkhAnAmAM jaze A bicAro ? ahIMthI ja tame kADhI mUkazo to e kayA davAkhAnAmAM dAkhala thaze ? bahAra koI davAkhAnAmAM phITa che ja nahIM." eTale pachI meM cAlu karyuM pAchuM !! paNa dAdAzrI : e bhAga paramAtmabhAga che !!! 'kyAM jaze e ?" paramAtmabhAga bole che ! 'bhale gAMDo-ghelo che, ApaNI joDe avinayamAM bole che, paNa te have kyAM jaze ?!' e paramAtmabhAga bole che ne !! bIjuM koI davAkhAnuM nathI ke saMghare Avo mAla. sArAne ja nathI saMgharatA to pachI ! ane saMgharIne ya enI pAse davAo nathI. enI pAse khAMDelA cUrNa che. te ahIM khAMDelA cUrNa nA cAle. ahIM to lahI joIe, te Ama coMTI jAya copaDatAMnI sAthe ja !! bAkI A kAdavamAM, pAcho gaMdhAtA kAdavamAM koNa hAtha ghAle ? paNa e eka jIva tare ne, to bIjA keTalAya jIvo badhAnuM rAge paDI jAya, bicArAM ! ane enuM kalyANa thAya evAM bhAva hoya, te kalyANa karavA mATe ja ame vaDhIe. nahIM to AvuM koNa vaDhe ? magaja koNa kharAba kare ! A to sAmAnA kalyANa mATe vaDhavAnuM. nahIM to bApa to bApa thavA sAru vaDhe. sAmAnA hita karatAM bApa thavAnI bahu bhIkha hoya. bairIne dhaNI DakAvato hoya to te dhaNIpaNA mATe kare ! ane 'jJAnI puruSa' sAmAnA kalyANa mATe vaDhe. kAraNa ke jagata AkhuM zakkarIyAM bharahADamAM mUke tema baphAI rahyuM che. phorenavALAo hau baphAI rahyA che ne ahIMvALA ye baphAI rahyA che. 'zakkarIyAM baphAI rahyA che" evuM eka jaNane kahyuM tyAre e kahe che, "dAdA, zakkarIyAM baphAI rahyA che kaho cho, paNa have to saLagavA hau mAMDyA che. je pANI hatuM, te khalAsa thaI gayuM ne zakkarIyAM saLagavA mAMDyAM che." eTale A dazA che ! ApaNA satsaMgano hetu zo che ? jagata kalyANa

Page #236
AptavANI-9 421 karavAno hetu che. e bhAvanA kaMI nakAmI jatI nathI. ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ke sarva duHkhonA kSaya karo. A du:kho amArAthI jovAtAM nathI. chatAM amane 'imozanala'paNuM thatuM nathI. eTalA joDe joDe vItarAga chIe. chatAM sAmAnA duHkhuM amArAthI sahana nA thaI zake. kAraNa ke ame amArI sahanazakti jANIe chIe. amArAthI duHkha sahana kevuM thatuM hatuM te jANIe ne, to evuM A loko kevI rIte sahana karI zakatA haze e amane khyAla che eno ane e ja kAruNyatA che. amArI ! [9] potApaNuM : paramAtmA abhedatA, AkhA vizva saMge ! ahIM to abhedabhAva che. tame ne huM badhA eka ja chIe ApaNe. mane tamArA koIthI judAI lAgatI ja nathI. ane A ATalA pacAsa hajAra mANaso che chatAM temanI joDe ya mane judAI nathI ne A duniyA joDe ya mane judAI lAgatI nathI. A to tamane judAI lAge che. eTale eka to, A pacAsa hajAra mANaso che temAM abheda rahuM chuM ane 'sekanDarI', AkhA jagata joDe abheda rahuM chuM. mAre bIjI koI jagyAe bheda nathI, koI joDe. eTale peluM 'sekanDarI abheda chuM ane A 'pharsTa' abheda ATalo chuM. mAre bIjuM kazuM joItuM nathI. mAre buddhi ja nathI. eTale amane abheda lAge, badhuM potAnuM ja lAge. buddhi hoya tyAM sudhI ja bheda paDe. bAkI buddhi nahIM, tyAM bheda zo ? buddhi to bheda pADe, dekhADe judAI ke "A mAruM ne A tAruM." jyAM buddhi ja nathI, tyAM "mAruMtAruM' rahyuM ja kyAM che ?! A to bhedabuddhi utpanna thaI che - 'huM judo ne A judo." praznakartA H alaga thayo eTalI ja vAra. to ja judAI lAge ne ! dAdAzrI : ane alaga thayo eTale UMdho thayo. amAre tamArI joDe

Page #237
AptavANI-9 423 alagatA nathI, paNa tamane mArI joDe alagatA che. praznakartA : ApaNe badhA eka ja chIe, evuM keTalAka bole che ne ! dAdAzrI : e to lAge evuM paNa Ama alagatA rahevAnI. jyAM sudhI e geDamAM bese nahIM tyAM sudhI alaga ja lAge. moDhe bolIe kharAM ke ApaNe eka ja chIe, paNa geDamAM bese nahIM tyAM sudhI alaga ja lAgyA kare. e geDamAM besavuM joIe. eTale mane AkhA jagatamAM judo koI lAgato ja nathI. ahIM AvyA che eTalAM ja mArAM che, evuM nahIM. A badhAM ja mArAM che ane huM badhAMne chuM ! jeTalI abhedatA rahe eTalI potAnA AtmAnI puSTi thAya che. hA, badhuM A judAI mAne che tethI to potAnA AtmAnI zakti badhI chinnabhinna thaI gaI ne ! judAI mAnavAthI ja A bhAMjagaDa UbhI thaI ne ! tamAre have judAI rahe che koInI joDe ? praznakartA : paNa e judAI badhI kADhavI che. dAdAzrI : zuM vAta karo cho ? judAI kADhyA vagara to chUTako ja nathI ne ! abheda thavuM paDaze ne ?! potApaNuM gayuM eno artha ja judAI jatI rahI. have, jyAM sudhI buddhi hoya tyAM sudhI potApaNuM choDe nahIM ne ! ne buddhi hoya tyAM sudhI buddhi bheda pADe che ne ! e potApaNuM jAya to abheda thavAya. ApApaNuM soMpI dIdhuM ! juo, huM tamane kahI dauM. Ama karatAM karatAM ghaNo kALa amAro gayo. tethI tamane to huM sahelo rasto batADuM chuM. mAre to rastA khoLavA paDelA. tamane to huM je raste gayelo e rasto dekhADI dauM chuM, tALAM UghADavAnI cAvI ApI dauM chuM. A 'aMbAlAla mULajIbhAI paTela' che ne, emaNe potAnuM ApApaNuM choDIne bhagavAnane ja soMpI dIdhuM che. te bhagavAna emanuM badhuM saMbhALI le che. ane evuM saMbhALe che ne, kharekharuM ! paNa potAnuM ApApaNuM chUTI gayuM, ahaMkAra gayo tyAra pachI. bAkI, ahaMkAra jAya 424 AptavANI-9 evo nathI. e potApaNuM che tyAM sudhI ja bheda che ane tyAM sudhI ja bhagavAna cheTA che. potApaNuM choDyuM ke bhagavAna tamArI pAse ja che. choDI do ne, tadana saheluM ! potApaNuM choDyuM to bhagavAna ja calAvI leze tamAruM. tamAre kazuM karavAnuM nA hoya, tame potApaNuM choDI do to. 'dAdA bhagavAna' kone jANo cho tame AmAM ? A je dekhAya che ne, e to 'pablIka TrasTa" che, e.ema.paTela' nAmanuM. ane emane jene tyAM satsaMga mATe laI javAnA hoya to laI jAya, jevA saMjoga bAjhe tevuM laI jAya. kAraNa ke AmAM 'amAruM" potApaNuM nathI. zrImad rAjacaMdra zuM kahyuM? ke "jJAnI puruSa' koNa ? jene kiMcitmAtra koI paNa prakAranI spRhA nathI, duniyAmAM koI prakAranI bhIkha jene nathI, upadeza ApavAnI ye jene bhIkha nathI ke ziSyonI ye bhIkha nathI, koIne sudhAravAnI ye bhIkha nathI, koI paNa jAtano garva nathI, gAravatA nathI, potApaNuM nathI e. e potApaNAmAM badhuM AvI jAya che. A 'varlDamAM koI mANasa evo nA hoya ke jene potApaNuM nA hoya, ApaNI A duniyAmAM. brahmAMDamAM badhuM judI vAta che. tyAM to badhA tIrthakaro che, badhuya che. jyAre ApaNI duniyAmAM potApaNuM nA hoya evo koI mANasa hoya nahIM. potApaNuM nA hoya evA to phakta tIrthakara gotramAM nApAsa thayelA hoya eTalAM ja hoya. "jJAtI'te potApaNuM nathI ! potApaNuM rahitanAM zuM lakSaNa hoya ? potApaNuM nA hoya eTale zuM ? ke sat puruSane ema kaho ke "Aje muMbaI cAlo.' tyAre 'nA' evuM e nA bole. loko emane muMbaI laI jAya to e poTalAnI peTha jAya, ane poTalAnI peTha amadAvAda Ave. eTale potApaNuM nathI. amane pUche ke, 'dAdAjI, kyAre ApaNe jaIzuM ?" ame kahIe, 'tamane ThIka lAge tema.' amAre bIjuM kazuM bolavAnuM nahIM. eTale e loko poTalAne laI jAya, te guno nathI. ame ja evuM kahIe ke, "bhaI, tamane ThIka lAge

Page #238
AptavANI-9 425 tyAre laI jajo.' kAraNa ke potApaNuM nA hoya. ane jene potApaNuM hoya e poTalAnI peTha jAya ke ? e to kaheze, 'Aja nathI AvavAnA.' ane mAruM to potApaNuM ja nathI jyAM AgaLa ! poTaluM thavA koI taiyAra hoya ? have evuM eka paNa mANasa bole ?! eTale amane to tyAM muMbaI ke vaDodarA keTalAMka pUche ke ke, "dAdA tame vahelA AvyA hota to sAruM.' Amatema bole. tyAre meM kahyuM, poTalAnI peTha mane teDI lAve che tyAre ahIM AvuM chuM ne poTalAnI peTha laI jAya che tyAre jAuM chuM.' tyAra pachI e samajI jAya. to kahe ke, 'A poTalAnI peTha kaho cho ?' are, A poTaluM ja che ne, tyAre bIjuM zuM che te ? mahIM bhagavAna che AkhA, paNa bahAra to poTaluM ja che ne ! eTale potApaNuM rahyuM nahIM ne !! mane jyAM UMcakIne laI jAya tyAM jaIe ame. ghaNI cIjo amAre nA khAvI hoya to ye khAIe chIe, nA pIvI hoya to ye pIe chIe, nA joItuM hoya te ya badhuM karavAmAM Ave che amAre. ane emAM cAle nahIM. pharajiyAta che ne ! sAmAnA enkarejamenTa' mATe ame tamArI cA pIe. e cA bahu kaDaka hoya, prakRtine nA phAve evI hoya, to ya tamane AnaMda thAya ne, ke 'dAdA'e mArI cA pIdhI. te eTalA mATe ame e pI jaIe. A ATalA dahADAnI musApharI karI, temAM ya badhAnAM kahevA pramANe ja rahevAnuM. e kahe ke 'ahIM rahevAnuM.' tyAre huM kahuM ke 'hA, rahevAnuM.' e kahe ke 'ahIMthI UTho have' to evuM. amAre 'amArApaNuM' nA hoya, 'amArApaNA'nuM unmUlana thaI gayuM. A to bahu dahADA 'amArApaNA' karyA. amAre to pahelethI mamatA bahu jUja hatI, eTale bhAMjagaDa ja nahIM kazI. evuM che ne, huM to badhAne AdhIna rahuM chuM, enuM zuM kAraNa ? mAre potApaNuM nathI. eTale huM to bilakula saMjogonAM AdhIna rahuM chuM. huM to tamAre AdhIna paNa rahuM chuM, to vaLI saMjogonA AdhIna to rahuM ja ne ! AdhInatA eTale saMpUrNa nirahaMkAratA !! AdhInatA to bahu sArI vastu 426 AptavANI-9 che. amArI joDe je che e kahe evuM amAre karavAnuM. amAro koI abhiprAya nahIM. amane ema lAge ke haju emanI vAtamAM kacAza che tyAre ame emane kahIe ke, 'bhAI, Ama karo.' pachI ame AdhIna ja rahevAnA niraMtara. 'jJAtI' asahaja tathI ! amArI A sAhijakatA kahevAya. sAhajikatAmAM badho vAMdho nahIM. Dakhala ja nahIM ne, koI jAtanI. tame Ama kaho to Ama ne tema kaho to tema. potApaNuM nahIM ne ! ane tame kaMI ochuM potApaNuM choDI do evA cho ?! amane to 'gADImAM javAnuM che' kahe to tema. e pAchAM kAle kaheze ke 'Ama javAnuM che' to tema. 'nA' ema nahIM. amAre kaMI vAMdho ja nahIM. amAre potAno mata nA hoya. enuM nAma sAhajikapaNuM. pArakAnA mate cAlavuM e sAhajikapaNuM. amAre sAjikatA ja hoya, niraMtara sAhajikatA ja rahe. eka kSaNavAra sAhajikatAnI bahAra nahIM jAya. emAM amAre potApaNuM hoya nahIM, tethI kudarata jema rAkhe tema rahe. potApaNuM chUTe nahIM tyAM sudhI kyAMthI sahaja thavAya ? potApaNuM hoya tyAM sudhI sahaja zI rIte thAya paNa ? potApaNuM mUkI de to sahaja thAya. sahaja thAya eTale upayogamAM rahevAya. pachI ja DrAmeTika rahevAya ! 'potApaNuM' to bahu moTo zabda che. eka saheja paNa potApaNuM, koI paNa jAtanuM potApaNuM amArAmAM nA hoya. ane chatAM ya hIrAbAne joDe besADIe, karIe. loka kaheze, 'A koNa ?" tyAre ame kahIe, 'amArA dhaNiyANI thAya.' badhuM ya kahIe ame. ane eme ya kahIe ke, 'tamArA vagara mane gamatuM nathI.' evuM kahuM eTale emane keTalo AnaMda thAya ! paNa amAruM A badhuM 'DrAmeTika' hoya. eka bhAI mane kahe che, 'mArI jamIna para pagalA mUkazo ?" meM kahyuM, 'mAre zuM vAMdho che !' ane ame to badhuM ya pUchIe, ke jamInanA sodA kyAre karyA, zuM bhAve lIdhuM, zuM devAnuM. ane koIka to ema jANe tyAre ke A dAdA to jamInanA dalAla thaI gayA !

Page #239
428 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : buddhinI sAthe paNa potApaNAno saMbaMdha kharo ne ? dAdAzrI : buddhi e potApaNuM sUcave che. potApaNuM jema jema jAya, jema jema ochuM thatuM jAya tema buddhi kamI thAya. praznakartA : mArApaNuM ane potApaNuM e bemAM phera zuM haze ? dAdAzrI : mArApaNuM che te mamatva sUcave che ane potApaNuM je che ne, te UMco ahaMkAra che, moTo ahaMkAra che. e kaMI nominala ahaMkAra nathI. AptavANI-9 427 ane zarIra kazuM dhoLo DAgha koIne thayo hoya amatho, kazuM thavAnuM nA hoya ne, to ya te mane dekhADa dekhADa kare. eTale huM amatho hAtha pheravI ApuM Ama, enAM manamAM samAdhAna mATe. praznakartA : Aye nATaka ja ne ? dAdAzrI : nATaka ja ! ane nahIM to ye Akho dahADo amAruM nATaka ja hoya che. Akho dahADo nATaka ja karuM chuM ! tamAre tyAM darzana karavA teDI gayA ne tyAM padharAmaNI karI te ya nATaka. ane nATaka nA hota to to mAruM potApaNuM hota ahIM. potApaNuM nathI mATe nATaka thAya che. nahIM to 'mAre padharAmaNI mATe javuM paDaze. mAre padharAmaNI karavAnI che' e badhuM hota. paNa evuM kazuM nathI. eTale A 'DrAmA" ja che. Akho dahADo huM 'DrAmA' ja karuM chuM. tyAM AgaLa satsaMgamAM besuM, A javAba ApuM, te ya 'DrAmA' ja che. Akho dahADo 'DrAmA' ja che, paNa potApaNuM ochuM thaI jAya tyAra pachI ja DrAmA zarU thAya. ema ne ema thAya nahIM. chatAM rahyuM potApaNuM ! keTalAMka to ema ja jANe ke 'ApaNane potApaNuM che ja nahIM ne, ApaNane mArApaNuM che ja nahIM ne, have.' ane Ama kaSAyamAM vartato hoya. le !! vartato hoya kaSAyamAM ane kahe che 'mAre potApaNuM nathI rahyuM have." potApaNA upara to jIve che e. e jIve che ja potApaNA upara. e potApaNuM to emanuM jAya nahIM. potApaNuM javuM e to mahA mahA muzkela. potApaNuM javuM eTale zuM ? ApaNo avAja nA hoya emAM, ne tame, badhA kahe ema ja karo ke tamArI mahIM avAja tamAro judo rAkho ? praznakartA : judo rahe. dAdAzrI : e ja potApaNuM. ane amAro to avAja ja nahIM koI jAtano. amane kaheze 'dAdA, peNe beso.' to ame tyAM besIe. amane nA gamatuM hoya to ya besIe. A 'jJAna' lIdhA pachI 'huM" ne "mamatA' 'tame" choDI dIdhAM. paNa potApaNuM nathI choDyuM. tamAre "huM" ne "mamatA' chUTI gayAM emAM be mata nahIM. kAraNa ke khovAI gayA pachI ciMtA nathI karato. mamatA konuM nAma kahevAya ? khovAI gayA pachI ciMtA kare, enuM nAma mamatA. eTale tamane " ne "mAruM" gayuM che, chatAM ya potApaNuM rahyuM. praznakartA : potApaNuM eTale inDivijyuAliTI ? huM bIjAthI kaMIka judo chuM e ? dAdAzrI : 'inDivijyuAliTI' to gaI. 'huM" ne "mAruM" beu gayuM, paNa potApaNuM rahyuM che. kAraNa ke koI game eTalo krodha kare, game eTaluM apamAna kare, to sAmasAmI bAjhAbAjha karIne chevaTe e eno rAtre nikAla lAvIne suI jAya. chevaTe to eno nikAla lAve. eTale ahaMkAra gayo che e khAtarI. nahIM to ahaMkAra AkhI rAta calAvyA kare. ane A to thoDo bAjhAbAjha kare vakhate, paNa nikAla lAve ne ? pelo ahaMkAravALo nikAla nA lAve. e AgaLa vera vadhAryuM ja jAya. ane mamatAvALo to gajavuM kapAyuM tenA traNa dahADA pachI ye bUmAbUma karato hoya. koIka saMbhAre ne, tyAre tarata 'arere, zuM karuM ?!" ema kare. ane A tamane to gayuM e gayuM. eTale ahaMkAra ne mamatA, be gayAM che, potApaNuM rahyuM che. e juo ne ! tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ne, ke jJAnI puruSa'mAM potApaNuM nA hoya.

Page #240
AptavANI-9 429 kRpALudeve 'potApaNuM'no zabda lakhyo che, kaMIka bhAre lakhyuM che ! tamane kema lAge che ? kRpALudeve A zabda sarasa lakhyo che ne ? have A koNa samajAve ? je bhASAmAM kahevA mAge che e bhASA koNa samajAvI zake ahIM AgaLa ? praznakartA : 'jJAnI puruSa' samajAvI zake ne ! dAdAzrI : hA. kAraNa ke bIjA koInuM kAma ja nahIM ne ! sattA gaI, potApaNuM rahyuM ! praznakartA : AptasUtramAM vAkya che. "jJAnInuM aMtaHkaraNa kevI rIte kAma karatuM haze ?! 'pote' khasI jAya to aMtaHkaraNathI AtmA judo ja che.'' e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : e aMtaHkaraNa eka bAju saMsAra kArya kare ane eka bAju AtmA AtmAnuM kArya kare. 'jJAnI'ne DakhoDakhala hoya nahIM. aMtaHkaraNa kone kahevAya ? ke jemAMthI kartAbhAva utpanna thAya che, 'huM kaMIka karuM chuM' e bhAva utpanna thAya che. e aMtaHkaraNathI 'jJAnI' judA hoya. A 'jJAna' ApyuM eTale tamAre 'riyalI' kartAbhAva rahyo nathI, paNa 'rileTivalI' kartAbhAva rahyo che. eTale ke 'DiscArja' kartAbhAva rahyo che. paNa tamAre haju mahIM saheja Dakhala rahe che ane 'jJAnI puruSa'ne pelI Dakhala nA rahe. 'pote' khasI jAya to 'aMtaHkaraNa'thI 'AtmA' judo ja che. A 'aMtaHkaraNa'mAM 'pote' rahelo che. e 'pote' khasI jAya. praznakartA : 'pote' koNa ? e 'potA'nI 'Dephinezana' Apone ! dAdAzrI : e ja potApaNuM che. ame kahIe 'heMDo bagIcAmAM.' to tame nA pADo ke 'nA. mane nahIM phAve tyAM AgaLa, huM nahIM AvuM.' e ja potApaNuM. ane 'jJAnI puruSa'ne potApaNuM nA hoya. te ApaNe jema kahIe tyAM Ave. praznakartA : e potApaNuM koNa bajAve che ? AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : e ja. e ja, mULa hato teno te ja. haju e 'sITa' choDato nathI. sattA UDI gaI, paNa 'e' 'sITa' choDato nathI. eTale dhIme dhIme e 'ApaNe' choDAvI devAnI. 'ene' sattA UDI gayelI che, eTale vAMdho nahIM. paNa A 'sITa' choDavI sahelI nathI. potApaNuM chUTavuM saheluM nathI. potApaNuM tamane samajAyuM ke nA samajAyuM ? je 'DiscArja' thayelo che, paNa emAM potApaNAnA mahIM evA bhAva vartyA kare che. narI 'IphekTa' ja che. sattA gaI che, sattA to AkhI cAlI gaI che. paNa peluM mULa svarUpa jatuM nathI. e dhIme dhIme mULa jAya, tadana jAya nahIM ne ! 430 amane potApaNuM nA hoya. eTale evuM thavAnuM che. tamAre ya A 'jJAna' pachI 'enI' sattA jatI rahI che, eTale jyAre tyAre evuM ja thaze. paNa A zuM thayAM che e jANavuM joIe. 'huM'paNuM gayuM che, sattA gaI che. sattA gaI eTale khalAsa thaI gayuM. paNa 'pote' rahyo che. huM, vakIla, maMgaLadAsa ! A 'pote' eTale tamane samajAvuM. eka vakIla AvyA hatA. meM kahyuM, 'zuM nAma ?' tyAre e kahe che, 'maMgaLadAsa.' 'dhaMdho zo ?' tyAre e kahe che, 'vakIlano.' 'eTale huM vakIla chuM bolo cho ke ?' tyAre e kahe che, 'e to huM ja vakIla chuM ne.' 'ane maMgaLadAsa koNa ?' tyAre e kahe che, 'huM.' 'ane vakIla koNa ?" tyAre e kahe che, 'huM.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'huM vakIla maMgaLadAsa, evuM bolavAnuM ne, tamAre ?" evuM eka jaNa bolato hato. rAte gharanAM badhAM sUI gayA hatA ne, to bahAra sAMkaLa khakhaDAvI. 'alyA, atyAre rAtre be vAge koNa khakhaDAve che ?' tyAre e kahe che, 'huM.' 'alyA, paNa huM koNa ? oLakhANa pADo. to bAraNuM UghADIe, nahIM to bAraNuM nahIM UghADuM.' tyAre e kahe che, 'huM bAvo.' 'alyA, paNa kayo bAvo ? bola ne.' tyAre e kahe che, 'huM bAvo maMgaLadAsa.' tyAre pelAe bAraNuM UghADyuM. evuM A 'huM vakIla maMgaLadAsa' che. tame A 'jJAna' lIdhuM eTale e 'vakIla' ne 'maMgaLadAsa' jatuM rahyuM, paNa 'pote' rahyuM. te hajI tamane potApaNuM che. korTamAM koI vakIla UMdhuM bole ne, te ghaDIe potApaNuM UbhuM

Page #241
AptavANI-9 431 thaI jAya. atyAre mArI joDe ApaNA satsaMga saMbaMdhI ke bIjA koI saMbaMdhI mahIM moTI lAMbI vAta laIne Avyo hoya to doDha kalAka bhale cAle. paNa DakhoDakhala amAre nA hoya ne ! ane bIje to evuM thAya to matabheda hala thaI jAya. amAre DakhoDakhala nA hoya. so kalAkanuM kAma eka kalAkamAM karI ApIe, haMDreDa avarsanuM kAma. paNa DakhoDakhala nahIM ne ! kAraNa ke amAre potApaNuM ja nathI ne ! rakSaNa, te lakSaNa potApaNAtAM ! potApaNuM che ke nathI ? praznakartA : koI vAra UbhuM thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : nahI to zuM rahe ? AtmA tarIke rahe ?! potApaNuM nA rahe e niraMtara jAgRta hoya. jeTalI jAgRti nathI eTaluM badhuM ya potApaNuM ja che. koI temane kahe ke 'tame kharAba cho." to tarata potApaNuM UbhuM thAya ne ? praznakartA: koIka vAra thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : koIka vAra thAya ke rojeroja thAya ? kyAre nA thayuM e kaho ne ! A to badhuM potApaNuM ja che ne ! je pote rakSaNa kare tyAMthI potApaNuM, potAnuM rakSaNa kare tyAMthI potApaNuM. A prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare e badhuM potApaNuM. prakRtinuM e mAlikIpaNuM Ama zraddhAe tUTyuM che, paNa te haju potApaNuM jatuM nathI ne ! praznakartA: 'mAruM kharuM che" e jayAM sudhI che tyAM sudhI potApaNuM ja rahe ne ? dAdAzrI : kharuM-khoTuM hotuM ja nathI. e potApaNAno vAMdho nahIM. bIjAM badhAM bahu potApaNAM hoya ne ! saheja kahetAM pahelAM to phATI jAya. prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare, te rakSaNa to kare paNa kapaTa karIne avaLuM hau pheravI nAkhe. tyAM AgaLa potApaNuM Dabala thaI gayuM. potAnI tanatoDa rakSA karavI, enuM nAma potApaNuM. atyAre to potApaNuM sAcave, paNa pAchAM 432 AptavANI-9 kaLA karIne ya khasI javA mAge evuM hau kare. eTale uparathI kaLA hale kare. kaLA eTale kapaTa.. potApaNAno artha samajI gayAM ne ? haju potAnI jAtanI rakSA kare che ane te kapaTa karIne, kaLA karIne ya rakSA kare che. praznakartA : potAnI prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare e potApaNuM kahyuM, to pachI e bhAga kapaTamAM kyAre jAya ? dAdAzrI : badhuM potApaNuM prakRtinAM rakSaNamAM ja jAya paNa amuka kapaTapaNuM nA hoya e potApaNuM sAruM kahevAya, suMvALuM kahevAya ne peluM kapaTavALuM e kharAba kahevAya. praznakartA : Ape kahyuM ke prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavuM e potApaNuM. kaLA karIne ya rakSaNa kare, kapaTa karIne ya rakSaNa kare, e Dabala potApaNuM. dAdAzrI : hA, e Dabala potApaNuM. chokarAo paNa rakSaNa kare che, paNa kaLA karIne nA kare. praznakartA : potAne khabara paDe ke A kapaTa karyuM, kaLA karIneya potAnI prakRtinuM rakSaNa karyuM. to e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : te eTaluM pAtaLuM kapaTa hoya to khabara paDe. kapaTIne ya khabara paDe, jADuM kapaTa hoya to khabare ya nA paDe. tyAM gADha potApaNuM ! potApaNuM choDavAnI IcchA che ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : paNa paheluM to ApaNAthI koIkane duHkha thatuM aTakaze tyAra pachI pelAM paDaLa jAya. praznakartA : kayAM paDaLa ? dAdAzrI : potApaNAnAM ne bIjAM badhAM paDaLo. ane A to

Page #242
AptavANI-9 433 potApaNuM kare che kharuM, paNa pAchuM 'eTeka'vALuM potApaNuM. rakSaNavALuM potApaNuM juduM ne 'eTeka'vALuM potApaNuM juduM. praznakartA: A moTI vAta nIkaLI. eka rakSaNavALuM ne bIjuM eTeka'vALuM. dAdAzrI : hA, eTale 'eTeka'vALuM jAya to pachI rakSaNavALuM Ave. tyAre potApaNuM kharuM kahevAya. nahIM to tyAM sudhI ene hiMsakabhAva ja kahevAya. ane "eTeka'vALuM potApaNuM chUTe tyAra pachI peluM rakSaNavALuM potApaNuM chUTavAnI zarUAta thAya. praznakartA: 'eTeka'vALuM potApaNuM e jarA vadhAre samajAvo ne ! dAdAzrI : koIkane duHkha thAya evuM potApaNuM zuM kAmanuM? potApaNuM ApaNI prakRtinA rakSaNa karavAmAM hota to vAta judI che. ene potApaNuM kahevAya. nahIM to peluM to potApaNuM ye nA kahevAya. lokone to haju potApaNuM kevuM che ? prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavAnI to vAta che ja, paNa UlaTuM 'eTeka hau kare che, sAmA upara prahAra hau kare che. eTale A moTuM potApaNuM kADhavAnuM che ne ? prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavuM e potApaNuM. karatA haze kharA ApaNA mahAtmAo ? tethI ja sahaja thatuM nathI, baLyuM. A to jarAka apamAna kare te pahelAM rakSaNa kare, jarAka bIjuM kaMI kare tyAM rakSaNa kare. e badhuM sahajapaNuM thavA ja nA de ne ! prakRtinuM rakSaNa amuka rIte rahe, paNa bIjuM badhuM potApaNuM javuM joIe. 'tamArAmAM akkala nathI' kahyuM tyAM rakSaNa nahIM karavAnuM. Ano svAmI koNa che ? ahaMkAra. pratikAra kare te ahaMkAra. Ano pratikAra koNa kare che ? ahaMkAra. paNa ahaMkAra to gayo che, ne khAlI khoTuM rakSaNa kare che ne ! e to jeTaluM thAya eTaluM sAcuM. paNa AvI vAta zAstramAM hoya nahIM, prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavAnI vAta hoya nahIM. kAraNa ke prakRtinuM rakSaNa koNa nA kare ? bhagavAna sivAya bIjAM badhA ya prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare. ane tame prakRti pArakI che chatAMya rakSaNa karo cho. pArakI che evuM jANo cho, chatAMya pArakI jaNelIne paiNavAnI taiyArI karo cho eya ajAyabI che ne ! 434 AptavANI-9 ahaMkAra ne mamatA gayAM che, paNa potApaNuM rahyuM che. juo ne, A ajAyabI ja che ne !! jotArA'te tathI potApaNuM ! potApaNAne ame zuM kahyuM? praznakartA : prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare e ja potApaNuM. dAdAzrI : to prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavuM joIe ? praznakartA ApaNe to jonArA chIe, karavAnuM zuM ne na karavAnuM zuM ? dAdAzrI : hA, "jonArAne to potApaNuM hotuM ja nathI ne ! 'jonArA'ne potApaNuM hoya ja nahIM ne ! paNa A to jayAM haju prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare che, tene mATe vAta che. tame Ama rahIne jatAM hoya ane eNe sudhI gayA tyAra pachI koI kahe, "nA, Ama rahIne javAnuM. te ghaDIe jarA mahIM AMcako lAge che ne ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : e ja prakRtinuM rakSaNa ! nahIM to eTalI ja "spIDathI pAchuM A bAju vaLI jAya. evI 'spIDathI ane evA ja 'TonathI ane evA ja 'mUDa'thI. je "muDa' hato ne, teno te ja 'muDa'. A to chellI dazAnI vAta karI ! 'TesTa', potApaNAto ! agara to hamaNe kaze gADImAM javAnuM hoya ne tamane kahyuM "Avo." ne besADyA pachI bIjA eka jaNe kahyuM ke 'utaro ahIMthI. hamaNe eka jaNa bIjA AvavAnA che." te vakhate zuM karo ? besI raho ne ? "nahIM UtaruM' evuM kaho ne ? praznakartA : pote UtarI jAya.

Page #243
AptavANI-9 435 dAdAzrI : tarata ? praznakartA: tarata ja. UtarI ja jAya ne ! dAdAzrI: 'nahIM UtaruM" evuM nA kahe ? paNa pachI AgaLathI thoDeka cheTe jaIe, ne pachI bolAve 'Avo'. to Ave ne ? moDhA para pheraphAra kazo nA thAya ne ? eTale zuM kahyuM che ? AvuM nava vakhata rahe to huM kahuM ke tuM 'dAdo' thaI gayo jA. AvuM nava vakhata kare ne nava vakhate UtarI jAya ane naveya vakhata utAranArane tuM kartA nA mAne, bolAvanArane ya kartA nA mAne, 'vyavasthita'ne ja kartA mAne. ane pAchA bolAve to ya manamAM kazuM ye nahIM, paNa hasatAM hasatAM pAchAM AvavAnuM ne hasatAM hasatAM UtaravAnuM, jo majhA Ave, jo majhA Ave ! tyAre zuM kahevAya e ? ke A bhaI prakRtinuM rakSaNa karato nathI ane eTale AnuM potApaNuM gayuM. pote prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavuM e potApaNuM. A to je prakRtithI chUTavuM che tenuM ja rakSaNa kare che. tyAre jaze potApaNuM ! have huM evuM nathI kaheto ke tamAre tamArI prakRtinuM rakSaNa nA karavuM. paNa eTaluM ApaNA manamAM ema lAgavuM joIe ke A jJAna tamane AvuM hovuM joIe. vartana huM nathI mAgato. vartana to kyAre Ave ? e zraddhA pratIti phITa thaI jAya, pachI e jJAna pariNAma pAme. jJAna ene anubhavamAM AvatuM jAya dahADe dahADe, tyAre vartanamAM Ave. eka phero utArI pADyA hoya to asara thaI jAya, te vaLI pAchuM mahIM jarA TATuM paDyuM tyAre jJAna yAda Ave. ema karatuM karatuM phITa thaI jAya. paheluM pratItimAM Ave, pachI anubhavamAM AvatAM AvatAM to pahelAM thoDIvAra zAnamAM gothAM khAyAM kare ne pachI vartanamAM Ave. paNa thoDuM ghaNuM anubhavamAM AvyuM to ya bahu thaI gayuM ne ?! ekAda-be pherA ya jo gADImAMthI UtarIne pAcho besavA Ave, 436 AptavANI-9 moTuM utaryA sivAya to ya ghaNuM sAruM kahevAya. hA, nahIM to moTuM kaDhI UtarI gayA jevuM thaI jAya ne ?! tamane evuM nA thAya mane lAge che, nahIM ? eka phero UtarI jo jo. evo vakhata Ave to UtarI jo jo ne pharI moTuM bagADyA sivAya besavAnuM. praznakartA : Apa kaho cho evuM saheluM nathI. dAdAzrI : hoya nahIM saheluM. paNa A zuM che ? A vAta zA sAru karIe ? ke A vAta ene zraddhAmAM besI jAya ne, to dhIme dhIme anubhava thatAM jAya. A karavAnuM ame nathI kahetA. A jANI rAkhavAnuM che ke AvI rIte ApaNe prakRtinuM rakSaNa karatuM baMdha thavuM paDaze. jeTaluM prakRtinuM rakSaNa karIe eTaluM khoTuM ne ! pADozI tarIke enI pharaja bajAvavAnI. paNa kaMI AvuM rakSaNa ochuM karAya ? koI utArI pADe to utarI javAnuM kahIe ne pharI bolAve to besavAnuM kahIe. praznakartA : dareka prasaMgoe A prakRti che e khyAla nathI raheto ghaNI vakhata. dAdAzrI : e jAgRti eTalI badhI nA rahe ne ! eTalA mATe to A ame halAva halAva karIe AvuM ke jethI jAgatAM rahe. paNa A to ApaNe UThAvIe tyAre e 'hA UDyo, hA UDyo' kahIne pAchuM pAsuM pheravIne sUI jAya. ApaNI pAse 'vyavasthita'nuM ATaluM sarasa jJAna che ne ! sAdhana nathI 'vyavasthita'nuM ? praznakartA : che sAdhana. bahu sarasa che. dAdAzrI : niveDo Avaze ne ? niveDo Avaze e khAtarI thaI gaI ne ? praznakartA : paNa ApaNA jJAnamAM 'vyavasthita'nI barobara samajaNa paDe to potApaNuM chUTI jAya ?

Page #244
438 AptavANI-9 437 dAdAzrI : chUTI jAya ne ! 'vyavasthita' e potApaNuM choDavA mATe ja meM ApeluM che, ne ejhekTa' che e. 'vyavasthita' eTale 'sAyanTiphika' vastu che. e kaMI tamane aDasaTTe ApelI vastu nathI. avalaMbana khoTuM ApyuM nathI, 'ekajhekTa' che. praznakartA : A to potApaNuM choDavuM nathI ane potApaNuM choDyA vagara vastu prApta karavAnI je vAta rAkhe che, e kevuM ? - dAdAzrI : hA, eTale ame zuM kahIe chIe ke potApaNuM chUTI jAya to enI meLe cAlyA kare evuM che. vagara kAmano zuM karavA pakaDI rAkhe che ! choDI de ne, ahIMthI. paNa te choDe nahIM ne ! kaheze, 'Ama thaI jaze ne Ama thaI jaze.' A 'jJAna' lIdhuM eTale 'pote' AtmA thaI gayo. 'prakRti mArI joya' ema kahe che, paNa pachI pAcho zuM kare ? prakRtinuM rakSaNa kare. prakRtinuM rakSaNa karavAmAM zUro, kare ke ? koI nA kare ? koI rakSaNa karatAM haze kharAM ? AptavANI-9 A potApaNAnA zokha chUTI jAya eTale potApaNuM chUTI jAya. jyAM sudhI zokha hoya tyAM sudhI chUTe ke ? praznakartA : A nA samajAyuM. badhA zokha chUTe tyAre ke potApaNAno zokha chUTe tyAre ? dAdAzrI : ekalo potApaNAno ja zokha chuTe tyAre. bIjA badhA zokha nA chUTe to vAMdho nahIM. potApaNAno zokha bahu bhAre hoya che. 'mAruM kaheluM ja karavuM paDaze" kaheze. eTale bIjAM badhA zokha nA chUTe to kazo vAMdho nahIM. praznakartA : potApaNAno zokha eTale emAM potAnuM dhAryuM karAvavuM e ? dAdAzrI : evuM nahIM. pAchuM dhAryuM karAvavA uparaya zokha, evuM nahIM. praznakartA: to ? dAdAzrI : potApaNuM ! AkhA jagatamAM badhAne hoya. e potApaNuM jAya eTale bhagavAna thaI gayA kahevAya. jene potApaNuM nahIM, e bhagavAna ! A tamane badhAne "jJAna" ApyuM che, paNa tamArI pAse potApaNuM che ja. jyAre tamAruM potApaNuM nahIM hoya te dahADe tame bhagavAna ja thaI gayA. atyAre ya bhagavAna ja cho, paNa thaI gayA nathI. kAraNa ke tamane potApaNuM che. paNa jyAre potApaNuM nahIM rahe tyAre tame bhagavAna thaI gayA hazo. bhAva" thakI Adaravo puruSArtha ! 'jJAna' hoya to potApaNuM jAya. nahIM to potApaNuM jAya nahIM. praznakartA : paNa ame badhAe jJAna meLavyuM to pachI jJAnathI e ApopuM vadhatuM jAya. kAraNa ke pachI ApaNane bhAna Ave ke A to ApopuM ghaTavAne badale vadhavA mAMDyuM. dAdAzrI : e ApopuM nathI. ApopuM to jyAre javAnuM thAya che praznakartA : e ja kare che ne ! dAdAzrI : zuM vAta karo cho ?! rakSaNa kare ! A rakSaNa thaI jAya e ja jANavAnuM che. A jANe eTale enI meLe dhIme dhIme badhuM chUTyA kare. ekadama chUTe evuM karavAnI jarUra nathI. ekadama kazuM thAya nahIM. nahIM to tAva caDhI jAya. e to A jANavAthI dhIme dhIme chUTyA kare. choDavo zokha potApaNAto ja ! praznakartA : potApaNuM sAmAnya rIte bIjI kaI kaI bAbatomAM kahevAya, e dAkhalo ApIne samajAvo ne ! dAdAzrI : tamAre AIsakrIma khAvo hoya ane AIsakrIma ApyA pachI e laI le to tamAruM potApaNuM dekhAya tamane. tamAruM ghaDiyALa paDAvI le ne, to te ghaDIe potApaNuM tamAruM dekhAya. evuM badhuM dareka vastumAM tamAruM potApaNuM tamane UghADuM dekhAya.

Page #245
AptavANI-9 439 ne, tyAre e ApopuM gaNAya che. jyAre 'yaoNra' thaI jAya che tyAre ApopuM gaNAya che, potApaNuM gaNAya che. praznakartA : A potApaNuM gayeluM hoya, paNa chatAM ya ghaNI vakhata pAcho Dakho thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : paNa gayuM ja kyAM che, te Dakho thAya che tame kaho cho ?! koInuM ya gayeluM dekhAtuM nathI. e gayA pachI to pharI Dakho kare nahIM. eka phero potApaNuM gayA pachI e Ama Dakho nahIM karavAnA. e caDhatI utaratI vastu nathI. e to yathArtha vastu che. e gayuM eTale gayuM. pharI pAchuM nA dekhAya. A aradhuM tamane thaI gayuM ne aradhuM nA thaI gayuM; evuM tamane lAgyuM ? nA. ema nathI. A potApaNuM evI vastu nathI ke je eka phero gayA pachI pharI e pAchuM Ave. paheluM to, potApaNuM jAya evuM ja nathI ne ! A 'potApaNuM javuM' e vAta pahelI vakhata ja nIkaLe che. amAre potApaNuM nA hoya. praznakartA : Apane potApaNuM lAvavuM hoya to zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : Ave nahIM ne ! eka phero nIkaLI gayA pachI zI rIte Ave ?!. praznakartA: A potApaNuM ApanA 'jJAna'thI javAnuM to kharuM ja. e nizcita vAta che. paNa e jhaDapathI kevI rIte jAya ? dAdAzrI : jhaDapa to, A TrenanI 'spIDa' vadhArIe, e to enAM sAdhana maMgAvIe tyAre thAya. paNa AmAM nA DhIla khoLavI, nA jhaDapa khoLavI. kAraNa ke e badhuM vikalpa che. hA, ApaNe bhAva karavo ke potApaNuM kADhavuM che, basa. e bhAva eTaluM badhuM kAma kare che ke potApaNuM nIkaLyA ja kare niraMtara. ane tame bhAva karo ke "nA, haju A saMsAra che tyAM sudhI potApaNuM kADhavAnI jarUra nathI" tyAre evuM. A "jJAna" ApyA pachI 'tamAruM' calaNa che A badhAM bhAva upara, ane A 'nikAlI bAbatamAM 'tamAruM calaNa nathI. tyAM to tamAre nikAla karI nAkhavAnuM. tamAruM kyAM kyAM calaNa che e samajAyuM ? bhAva upara tamAruM calaNa 440 AptavANI-9 che, ke 'have potApaNuM kADhavuM che, potApaNuM nA joIe have' to, tevuM ! kAraNa ke je potAnuM nathI tenuM potApaNuM karIe, kyAM sudhI evuM rahIe ?! ApaNane 'jJAna'thI samajAI gayuM ke A potAnuM nathI. have tyAM potApaNuM karIe, e bhUla ja che ne ! amAre evuM potApaNuM ja nA hoya. udya'mAM vartatuM potApaNuM ! 'jJAnI puruSa' potAnAM udaya AdhIna ja varcA karavAnA. emAM potApaNuM nA rAkhe. AjubAjunA saMjogo badhuM zuM kAma kare che, te udayanA AdhIna badhA saMjogo bhegA thAya, "sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa' bhegA thAya, ne te AdhAre badhuM vicare. praznakartA: jJAnIo ja udaya AdhIna varte, to bIjA badhAMne kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : bIjAne ya udaya AdhIna hoya. paNa peluM potApaNuM mahIM rahe emane. praznakartA : paNa Apa kaho cho ke dareka mANasa udayAdhIna varte che. to emAM eNe potApaNuM rAkhavuM hoya to rAkhI zake kharo ? dAdAzrI : potApaNuM ja rAkhe che. praznakartA : A 'jJAna' lIdhelA mahAtmAo mATe ? dAdAzrI : mahAtmAo hau potApaNuM rAkhe che. praznakartA : to pachI ame potApaNuM kevI rIte rAkhIe chIe ? dAdAzrI : rahe ja ! rAkhatA nathI, rahe ja ! paNa have dhIme dhIme ogaLatuM jAya. jeTalA ApaNA hisAba badhA cukavAya ne, eTaluM potApaNuM ogaLatuM jAya. e jeTaluM ogaLyuM eTaluM pachI potApaNuM nA rahe. eTale A badhAne potApaNuM ja che ne ! potApaNuM rahe ja. paNa A 'jJAna' lIdhuM che eTale emanuM potApaNuM haju ogaLe che. praznakartA : potApaNuM rahe to pachI 'cArja thAya ne, evuM thayuM ne ?

Page #246
442 AptavANI-9 441 dAdAzrI : nA. "cArja nA thAya. A potApaNuM 'cArja thAya evuM nathI. A potApaNuM 'DiscArja che, ogaLI jAya evuM che. " DiscArja ahaMkAra e potApaNuM ! ahaMkAra to jato rahyo tamAro. ame "jJAna" ApIe chIe tyAre ahaMkAra ne mamatA badhuM jatuM rahe che. paNa haju potApaNuM rahyuM che, eTale zuM? ke je ahaMkAra jIvato nathI te. evuM che, enI e ja vastuno lADavo vALo to lADavA kahevAya ane candrAM pADyAM to baraphIcUramuM kahevAya, ane cakatAMye nA pADyAM ne lADavAya nA vALyA ne ema ne ema coLyuM to cUramuM kahevAya. enI e ja vastu. vastu ekanI eka ja che A. ahaMkAra ne mamatA jatAM rahyAM e bhAgane atyAre potApaNuM kahIe chIe ApaNe. ahaMkAra jevuM dekhAya che. praznakartA : to pachI ahaMkAra ane potApaNAmAM zuM pharaka ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra to khase nahIM, ocho thAya nahIM. praznakartA : to A potApaNuM khasI jAya ? dAdAzrI : potApaNuM to ochuM thatuM ja jAya. potApaNuM eTale bharelo mAla, bharelo ahaMkAra, e nIkaLyA kare. ane A ahaMkAra to kevo che ? bharelo che ane navo bharAto ya jAya che, beu bhegAM che. ane pelo bharAto ahaMkAra 'ApaNA'mAM nIkaLI gayo ane bharelo rahyo. bharelo ahaMkAra to pelAM lokone ya khAlI thAya, paNa navo bharAto ya jAya che. ane ApaNe ahIMye khAlI thaI jAya, paNa ahIM have navo nathI bharAto. eTale 'cArja' ahaMkAra to jato rahyo. paNa 'DiscArja' ahaMkAra che, e potApaNuM kahevAya. pramANa "jAgRti'nuM " DiscArja potApaNuM ! praznakartA : eTale A 'jJAna' lIdhA pachI potApaNuM e "DiscArja bhAva kahevAya ! dAdAzrI : e 'DiscArja bhAva che, bharelo mAla che. e mAla AptavANI-9 nIkaLI jaze ema potApaNuM khalAsa thatuM jaze, potApaNuM UThI jaze. praznakartA : eTale potApaNuM A mAlanA AdhAre TakyuM che ? dAdAzrI : hA. praznakartA : ne mAla khAlI thaze tema potApaNuM khalAsa thaze ? dAdAzrI : hA, mAla khAlI thaze tema potApaNuM khUTatuM jaze. potApaNuM ema ne ema nathI khUTe evuM. TAMkImAMthI mAla khAlI thaI gayo eTale potApaNuM khalAsa thayuM. potApaNuM nIkaLyuM eTaluM jatuM ja jAya. paNa ochuM nIkaLyuM hoya to eTaluM vadhAre rahyuM ne vadhAre nIkaLyuM hoya to eTaluM ochuM thaI gayuM. tyAM jeTalI jAgRti e pramANe potApaNuM nIkaLI jAya. jAgRtinuM pramANa hoya, eTalA pramANamAM potApaNuM nIkaLI jAya. jAgRti vadhAre hoya to potApaNuM vadhAre pramANamAM nIkaLI jAya ne jaladI nIkaLI jAya. jAgRti ochI hoya to potApaNuM dhIme rahIne nIkaLe. paNa A 'jJAna' pachI potApaNuM atyAre tamane so e so TakA che. temAMthI jAgRti vadhAre hoya to ekadama dasa TakA potApaNuM nIkaLI jAya, ne jAgRti ochI hoya to be TakA ja nIkaLe. praznakartA : pachI bAkInA nevuM TakA potApaNAnAM to rahe ja ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. vadhAre jAgRtivALAne nevuM TakA rahe ne pelAM ochI jAgRtivALAne aThThANuM TakA rahe. praznakartA: have bAkInuM rahyuM e pAchuM kaI rIte khAlI thatuM jAya ? dAdAzrI : pachI pharI vakhate pAchuM nIkaLe e to. praznakartA : eTale jema jema udaya Ave tema tema potApaNuM nIkaLe ? dAdAzrI : hA, paNa emAM jeTaluM jAgRtinuM pramANa hoya eTaluM

Page #247
AptavANI-9 443 'spIDI' potApaNuM nIkaLI jAya. ane jeTalA TakA potApaNuM khalAsa thAya eTalA pramANamAM jAgRti vadhatI jAya. yathArtha jAgRti judApaNAtI ! praznakartA : udaya Ave, emAM jAgRti varte, to dasa TakA agara to be TakA potApaNuM khalAsa thayuM. to e jAgRti kevI hoya ? e jAgRti kaI rIte vartatI hoya to potApaNuM khalAsa thAya ? dAdAzrI : "zuddhAtmA chuM' e, pachI A AjJAonI e badhI jAgRti rahe. 'A koNa, huM koNa" e badhI jAgRti rahe. mAranAra e mAranAra nathI, e zuddhAtmA che evI badhI jAgRti rahe. "A huM hoya, A huM e je jANe che te AtmA ! "A huM ane A hoya' evI badhI jAgRti rahevI joIe. praznakartA kaI kaI bAbata pote nyAya ane kaI kaI bAbata pote che ? emAM zuM zuM jue ? dAdAzrI : badhI ya bAbata. e to ame 'jJAna' ApIe chIe ne ! jJAna" ApatI vakhate ame ApIe chIe ne, ke A tuM hoya. praznakartA : e juduM pADyA karyuM e AtmA kahyo ! dAdAzrI : basa, e ja AtmA ! praznakartA: have evuM niraMtara rahevuM joIe ne ! dAdAzrI : lakSamAM bhUlAya ja nahIM e juduM pADavAnuM. pachI jyAre hoya tyAre juduM pADavAnuM, enuM e. pachI e AtmA ja thaI gayo. khamIsane baTana vAse tethI karIne khamIsa kADhI zake ema che, evuM jANe che ne, ke A bhAga khamIsa che ne A huM. ke nA jANe ? ke tyAM badhuM sarakho ja bhAga jANe ? 444 AptavANI-9 kAyAnI avasthA niraMtara utpanna thayA karavAnI ne ? to tyAM ja jAgRti aviratapaNe mAge che ne, ke A huM hoya ane A huM ? dAdAzrI : A badhuM ATaluM hotuM ja nathI. paNa AmAM kyAMka rahI gayuM hoya ke ApaNe mahIM "InTaresTa' laIe, tyAre ApaNe kahIe, 'bhaI, ApaNuM hoya A.' bAkI, 'jJAna' ApyA pachI chUTo ja rahe che. paNa pachI mahIM bheLaseLa thaI jAya thoDoghaNo. praznakartA: eTale game tevAM pariNAma Ave e ApaNA joya, evuM mahIM lakSamAM rAkhavAnuM. dAdAzrI : hA, ke A huM ne A huM hoya ! praznakartA paNa AmAM A khamIsa juduM ane huM judo, evuM pelAmAM ene zuM dekhAya che ? dAdAzrI : evuM A mahIM hau evuM juduM dekhAya ne ! praznakartA: Ama darzanamAM zuM Ave ene ? eka dAkhalA tarIke kaho dAdAzrI : A patharo judo ne mAro hAtha judo, ema khabara nA paDe ApaNane ? pachI, A patharAno guNa che ne A mAro guNa che evuM ? praznakartA: hI. patharAnA guNane badhI rIte jANe ke A vajanavALo che, ThaMDo che, corasa che...... dAdAzrI : suMvALo che. praznakartA: to A guNadharma nhoya mArA ane mArA A guNadharma, emAM ene kevI rIte rahevAnuM ? dAdAzrI : ke A ThaMDuM mAruM hoya, A suMvALuM mAruM nhoya, A gusso thayo te mAro nhoya, kapaTa karyuM te mAruM hoya, dayA karI te mAruM hoya ! ApaNe pathArImAM sUI jaIe, to huM judo chuM e nA khabara paDe ? praznakartA: nA, e juduM sarasa rIte jANe. paNa have A mana-vacana

Page #248
AptavANI-9 45 khabara paDe ? praznakartA : tyAM to samajAya ke pathArI ane sUnAra kharekhara judAM ja che. paNa ene A AtmA ane A paugalika avasthA e judAM che, e je lakSamAM rahevuM joIe athavA je upayoga jAgRti rahevI joIe, tyAM vAMdho che ne ? dAdAzrI : pathArInI bAbatamAM kaMIka jAgRti che. paNa AtmAnI bAbatamAM to jAgRti UDI ja gayelI chene ! pathArInI vAta enA khyAlamAM rahe che. praznakartA : e paNa ene noMdha karAvIe tyAre kaheze, 'hA, be judAM dAdAzrI : e to purAvA sAthe ApuM tyAre e mAne. praznakartA : to evuM aMdaranI vastuomAM badhAM 'phejhijha'ne 'joya mArA ane huM zuddhAtmA' evuM samajavA mATe athavA evuM yathArtha jAgRtimAM rahevA mATe A badhA purAvAnI jarUra paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : purAvA to mukhya vastu che. praznakartA : e purAvA kayA kayA hoya aMdaranuM samajavA mATe ? dAdAzrI : jemAM aneka vastu bhegI thaIne kArya thAya e badhuM ApaNuM nhoya. traNa ja vastu bhegI thaI ane kArya thayuM to ya ApaNuM hoya. be vastu bhegI thaIne kArya thayuM toya ApaNuM hoya. kerI cappAthI nA kApI ane dAMtathI kApI. hA, e badhuM bheguM thaIne thayuM mATe e ApaNuM hoya ! jhINuM samajavuM paDaze ne ? cAle kharuM jADuM ? praznakartA : mULa vastu to sUkSmatama che. dAdAzrI : hA, mULa vastu sUkSmatama che ane vAta jADI kAMte to zuM thAya ?! praznakartA : paNa A vAta navI ja kahI. 446 AptavANI-9 dAdAzrI : navI nahIM, che ja pahelethI A ! A to tIrthaMkaronI pAse hatuM pahelethI ja hatuM ane Aje ya che. tame tamArI meLe tamArI laoN bukathI 'navuM' kaho, tenuM huM zuM karuM te ?! anubhava pramANa, ogALe potApaNuM ! A koI emanI laoN bukathI mAne ke 'ApaNe saMpUrNa thaI gayA.' tyAre meM emane kahyuM, 'kazuM ya thayA nathI, phAMphA nA mArazo. haju to badhuM bahu thavAnuM bAkI che. saMpUrNa thavuM e kaMI lADavA khAvAnA khela che ?" pachI mane kahe che, 'paNa ahaMkAra to jato ja rahyo che.' meM kahyuM, 'nhoya gayelo. badhuM pUrepUruM ja che. hajI tapAsa nathI karI.' paNa dhIme dhIme jAya e to. jema jema anubhavanA khattA khAIe, jeTaluM anubhavanuM pramANa eTaluM potApaNuM tUTyuM. ahaMkAra javo eTale to potApaNuM khalAsa thaI jAya ne ! haju to keTalA badhA anubhava thaze tyAre potApaNuM chUTavAno aMza Avaze. mULa ahaMkAra jato rahyo, 'cArja' ahaMkAra jato rahyo. ene ja ahaMkAra kahevAmAM Ave che. paNa pelo 'DiscArja' ahaMkAra javo e lADavA khAvAnA khela nathI. ahaMkAra jato rahyo, ene zuM kahevAya ? garva nahIM, gAravatA nahIM, potApaNuM nahIM. e badhuM nA javuM joIe ? A jJAna" pachI ahaMkAra to jato ja rahyo che, te "cArja' ahaMkAra to jato rahyo. pachI rahyo kayo ahaMkAra ? 'DiscArja'. e jeTalA anubhava pramANa thAya eTalo 'DiscArja ahaMkAra ocho thAya, ne tyAra pachI potApaNuM dhIme dhIme ghaTe. ema ne ema ghaTe nahIM. A lADavA khAvAnA khela nathI. tyAre e kahe che, "evuM AkhI jiMdagImAM nA thAya ?" meM kahyuM, 'ekabe avatAramAM mokSe javAze. bIjI khoTI AzAo rAkhavAno zo artha ?" khoTI AzAo rAkhIe emAM phAyado thAya ? A badhuM ya potApaNuM ! potApaNuM ogaLyA pachI to gAravatA-garva kazuM rahe nahIM ne ! A to garva-gAravatA badhuM ya rahe che. potApaNuM rahitanAM zuM lakSaNa hoya ?

Page #249
AptavANI-9 447 koI gALo de to ya svIkAra karI le, koI mAra mAre to ye svIkAra karI le. ahaMkAranAM pakSamAM besavuM e potApaNuM kahevAya. ajJAnatAnA pakSamAM besavuM e potApaNuM kahevAya. upayoga cUkyA e potApaNuM kahevAya. tame ya thoDI vAra upayoga cUkI jAva e potApaNuM kahevAya. tame kaho cho ke "mahIM je Ave che temAM bhaLI javAya che, tanmayAkAra thaI javAya che, ne pachI khabara paDe che." e potApaNAne lIdhe bhaLI javAya che. rahyo A ja puruSArtha ! praznakartA : A udayamAM tanmayAkAra rahevuM evuM 'vyavasthita' ghaDAyeluM hoya che ? - dAdAzrI : evuM 'vyavasthita hoya ja, enuM nAma ja udaya ! udayamAM tanmayAkAra evuM 'vyavasthita' hoya ja ane emAMthI puruSArtha karavo. te ghaDIe tapa thayA vagara rahe nahIM. A badhI jhINI vAto kyAre e kAMte ?! e to jema kAMDe tyAre khabara paDe. praznakartA : have ajJAnatA hatI tyAre pote prakRtimAM tanmayAkAra thato hato. 448 AptavANI-9 praznakartA : e barobara nA samajAyuM. dAdAzrI : "vyavasthita' evuM hovuM joIe ke puruSArthane anukULa thAya evuM. puruSArthanA virUddha thAya e badhuM 'vyavasthita' UMdhuM kahevAya. bhale nA gamatuM che. nA gamatuM che eTale e AtmA che e vAta nakkI thaI gaI. 'nathI gamatuM' tyAM e to AtmA tarIke che. praznakartA : paNa 'vyavasthita' to je AvI gayuM e AvI gayuM. paNa have tyAM AgaLa zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : je che emAM puruSArtha karavo paDe. tyAM baLa prajJAtaNuM ! praznakartA : eTale jyAre 'vyavasthita'ne AdhIna tanmayAkAra thAya tyAre ene tanmayAkAra nA thavA devuM. have A juduM rAkhavAnuM...... dAdAzrI : e je prakriyA che e ja puruSArtha che. praznakartA : e juduM rAkhavAnuM e koNa rAkhe ? dAdAzrI : e ApaNe rAkhavAnuM. koNe rAkhavAnuM eTale ?! je rAkhatuM haze e rAkhaze. paNa ApaNe nakkI karavuM ke mAre rAkhavuM che. ethI ApaNe jo prajJA hoIzuM to A bAju karaze ne ajJA hoIzuM to pelI bAju karIzuM. paNa ApaNe nakkI karavuM. A bAju thayuM eTale jANavuM ke prajJAe karyuM ane pelI bAju thayuM to ajJAe karyuM. ApaNe to nakkI ja ke "mAre puruSArtha ja karavo che. huM puruSa thayo. dAdAe mane puruSa karyo che. puruSa ane prakRti beu judAM pADyAM che. huM puruSa thayo chuM. mATe puruSArtha karavo che." evuM nakkI karavuM. A to Akho dahADo prakRtimAM jatuM rahe ghaNuMkharuM to, ema ne ema vahyuM ja jAya che pANI ! ema anubhava vadhato jAya ! praznakartA : eTale udaya Ave che eTalAM vakhata sudhI to A dAdAzrI : thato hato ja niyamathI ane rAjIkhuzI thaIne thato hato. ene game pAchuM. dArU pIvAno vicAra Avyo ke tarata tanmayAkAra thaI javAno. e game ene. ane have 'jJAna' pachI zuM thAya ? mahIM pote chUTo rahe. eTale nA gamatuM thAya. A nA gamatuM thAya enuM A tapa UbhuM thAya. praznakartA : eTale pahelAM gamatuM hatuM, te ja have nA gamatuM thayuM ? dAdAzrI : hA. gamatuM prakRtine bAMdhe ane nA gamatuM prakRtine choDe. udayakarmo 'vyavasthita' pramANe karavA paDe, te bahu nukasAna karanArAM che. Ama badhuM che nikAlI, paNa "mULa jJAnane pragaTa karavAmAM bahu nukasAna karanAruM che.

Page #250
AptavANI-9 449 potApaNuM TakavAnuM ja che ne, enI joDe ? dAdAzrI : potApaNuM khalAsa thayA pachI paNa udaya to Ave ja ne ! paNa e udayamAM potApaNuM nA hoya. praznakartA : hA, paNa e to potApaNuM khalAsa thAya tyAre ne ? dAdAzrI : tyAra pachI ye udaya to AvyA ja karavAnA ne ! paNa emAM potApaNuM nA hoya. udaya to mAre ya hoya ne ! paNa udayamAM potApaNuM amane nA hoya. udayamAM potApaNuM badhAne varte che. paNa 'jJAna' pachI e potApaNuM ochuM thatuM jAya, vadhe nahIM. ochuM thatuM thatuM khalAsa thaI jAya. praznakartA : ane e potApaNuM to udaya Avaze tyAre dekhAze ? dAdAzrI : hA. tethI kahyuM ke, jema jema udaya AvatA jAya, tema AtmAno anubhava Avato jAya, tema tema ahaMkAra ocho thato jAya. evI rIte A badhuM 'regyulara' thayA kare. ene anubhava pachI vadhato jAya. samajavI jJAtabhASAnI jhINI vAto ! praznakartA : to pachI ahaMkAra khalAsa karavAnI mAthAkUTa karavAnI jarUra nathI. enI meLe ja krama pramANe udayamAM Avaze ne ene ApaNe joyA karavAnuM. dAdAzrI : nahIM. ApaNe puruSArtha karavAno rahyo. 'kazuM karavA jevuM nathI' evuM nahIM. kharo puruSArtha ja have karavAno rahyo. praznakartA : paNa e 'joyA' karavA sivAya bIjo zo puruSArtha ? dAdAzrI : e joyA karavAnuM, paNa e jovAtuM nathI evuM. jovA ya evuM saheluM nathI e. puruSArtha karavAno ApaNe. puruSArtha karIe to jovAya. praznakartA : eTale kevo puruSArtha karavAno ? dAdAzrI : e ja puruSArtha karavAno ke A zuM mahIM baLI rahyuM che. 450 AptavANI-9 ne kevI rIte thaI rahyuM che. praznakartA : e jovAnuM thayuM ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa jovAnuM saheluM nathI. jovAya nahIM mANasathI. mANasa joI zake nahIM. puruSArtha kare to jovAya. puruSa thaIne puruSArtha kare to ja jovAya, tanmayAkAra thavA nA de. A to tanmayAkAra thaIne ene jue, eno artha ja nahIM ne ! 'miniMgalesa' vAta ne !! praznakartA : oho, tanmayAkAra thaIne ja jovAno prayatna kare ! dAdAzrI : hA, eTale 'miniMgalesa' vAta ne ! praznakartA : to kaI rIte juduM paDIne jovAnuM ? dAdAzrI : puruSArtha karIne ! emAM kaMI 'vyavasthita'nA AdhAre pelAmAM tanmayAkAra thAya, to tanmayAkAra nahIM thavA devuM ane pote potAnAmAM rahevuM, pelAne juduM rAkhavuM ane te juduM jovuM e puruSArtha ! have evuM jANavA-jovAnuM to rahe nahIM ne ! 'mahAtmA' bole eTaluM ja ke 'ame joIe-jANIe chIe." badhA ya ApaNA 'mahAtmA' bole che ke "ApaNe to badhuM jovAnuM ne jANavAnuM." meM kahyuM, 'bahu sAruM.' paNa kemanuM jovA-jANavAnuM te ?! A to badhA ja bole to ye huM 'leTa go' karuM. huM jANuM ke 'pharsTa sTAnDarDa" Avo ja hoya. praznakartA : paNa udaya to, covIseya kalAka udaya to rahevAnA ja ne ! dAdAzrI : e udaya ja che Akho dahADo ya. hA, pachI udayamAM tanmayAkArapaNuM te ya che enI joDe ne joDe. ane tanmayAkAra nathI thavA devuM e puruSArtha, te puruSArthe ya kAma kare che. paNa ghaNI jagyAe e puruSArtha ocho hoya che. keTaluMka to ema ne ema tanmayAkAra rahyA ja kare che. khabara paDyA vagara ema ne ema jatuM rahe che Akho dahADo ya ! ane pachI kaheze 'ApaNe joyuM-jANyuM ! alyA, zuM joyuM-jANuM ? e

Page #251
AptavANI-9 zAne kahe che ? A bhUtAM joyAM teM ? jovAnuM te zuM che ? ke 'vyavasthita' tanmayAkAra thavA detuM hoya, te jANavuM ke 'vyavasthita' A bAju laI jaI rahyuM che, tene ApaNe Ama kheMcI lAvavuM ane potAnA 'emAM' rAkhI ane tyAMthI pachI jovuM ane zuM baLatarA thavA mAMDI zarUAta te jovI. evo kaMI puruSArtha hoya, te puruSArtha eTale puruSanA AdhAre kaMIka hoya. 451 AvuM kaMI saheluM che 'jovuM-jANavuM' ? paNa badhA ya 'mahAtmAo' bole che evuM 'ApaNe dAdA, joIe ne jANIe, Akho dahADo e ja.' meM kahyuM, 'bahu sAruM.' kAraNa ke jhINI vAta emane khabara paDe nahIM, ne mAre mAthAkUTa paDe. A to tamArA lIdhe AvI jhINI vAta karuM chuM. nahIM to jhINI vAta karAya nahIM. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, AnI jarUra che. dAdAzrI : paNa kone karuM ? e to amuka ja hoya, tene karAya A vAta. 'akrama vijJAta'nI labdhi ! A 'jJAna' lIdhuM eTale pote AtmA che. paNa te sarvasva AtmA nathI e. e pratIti AtmA che. tyAre prakRti upazama thayelI hoya, to ya e pratIti AtmA che. ApaNA badhA 'mahAtmAo'ne pratIti AtmA che. praznakartA : eTale A 'jJAna' pachI AkhI prakRti haju upazama bhAvane pAmelI che. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa upazama bhAvane pAmelI eTale bahu thaI gayuM. eTaluM AvyuMne, upazama bhAvane pAmI e ja moTAmAM moTo puruSArtha. e ja moTI A labdhi kahevAya ene ! bAkI, bIjI badhI labdhio nathI. praznakartA : prakRti upazama che emAM zo puruSArtha ? dAdAzrI : ene puruSArtha kahevAya ne ! prakRti upazama thaI eTale prakRti tamane 'helpaphula' thaI. eTale puruSArtha karo to tamAro phaLe. prakRti 452 upazama nA thAya tyAM sudhI puruSArtha phaLe ja nahIM. AptavANI-9 praznakartA : paNa e prakRti to pAchI ubharAvAnI to kharI ja ne ? dAdAzrI : ubharAya. to ya paNa jyAre tyAre puruSArtha eno phaLe, vahelo-moDo paNa puruSArtha phaLe. paNa prakRti upazama thayelI hoya to. ane eka phero upazama thayA pachI ubharAya nahIM pharI, upazama thayA pachI jAya nahIM. AdhItatA vitA mokSamArga tathI praznakartA : upazama eTale zuM hoya emAM ? dAdAzrI : upazama eTale game eTaluM emanI para avaLuM jora karo to ya jAya ja nahIM. thoDIvAra avaLuM thaIne pachI pAchAM AvatAM rahe. ahIMthI chUTo nA paDe. bIjAM badhAM chUTAM paDI jAya. bahu tophAna mAMDone, to bhAgI jAya. ane upazamavALo to marI jAya to ya nA choDe. praznakartA : kyAM bhAgI jAya ? dAdAzrI : game tyAM AgaLa, jyAM ene 'sepha sAIDa' hoya tyAM. praznakartA : eTale ApanI pAsethI bhAgI jAya, ema ? dAdAzrI : hA. ane huM nA houM ne koIkanI pAse beTho hoya to e tyAMthI ye bhAgI jAya. upazama hoya te nA bhAge, mArI nAkhe to ye nA bhAge. ane pelo to juduM laIne bese. A tamAruM rahyuM, amAruM juduM. judo gaccha laI bese. traNa jaNa bhegA thAya, enuM nAma gaccha kahevAya. traNa sAdhuo ke traNa bhegA thaIne ArAdhanA karavA bese, enuM nAma gaccha kahevAya. bhagavAne enuM nAma gaccha ApyuM. gaccha kADhIe to zuM khoTuM ? traNa jaNa to maLI Ave ! praznakartA : paNa gaccha hoya tyAM mokSamArga nA rahyo ne, pachI ? dAdAzrI : hA, ane gaccha hoya eTale khalAsa. paNa evuM gaccha

Page #252
AptavANI-9 le ne ! A mAruM juduM ane A emanuM juduM. praznakartA : e to pachI paDe. dAdAzrI : paDelA ja che ne ! chUTo paDe tyAMthI ja paDelo hoya. jJAtIdazAnuM pramANa ! evuM che, A 'jJAna' lIdhuM eTale je AkhuM potApaNuM hatuM, te dhIme dhIme ogaLatuM ogaLatuM pachI dhIme dhIme jhIro thAya. 'jhIro' thAya eTale e 'jJAnI' kahevAya. pachI enI vANImAM badho phera paDI jAya. potApaNuM jAya tyAra pachI vANI nIkaLe. jeTaluM potApaNuM ghaTe eTalI vANI utpanna thaI jAya ane te vANI sAcI hoya ! bAkI, tyAM sudhI badhI vANI khoTI. A bahAra to, ApaNA 'jJAna' lIdhelA sivAya bIje badhe to potApaNuM hoya ane vANI bole che. paNa e vANI to vA-pANI jevI, vANI ja nahIM. e laukika badhuM kahevAya. ne ApaNA 'jJAna' lIdhelA hoya emane potApaNuM jAya pachI ja bolAya, nahIM to bolAya nahIM. 453 ane ApaNA 'jJAna' lIdhelA mahAtmAomAM koI ekuMya mANasa potAnuM svataMtra eka vAkya bolI zake che ? nahIM. tyAM sudhI koI 'mULa vastu'ne pAmyo nathI. eka vAkya nA bolAya. ane eka vAkya bole to sajjaDa thaI jAuM. basa, thaI gayuM ! eTale huM kahuM ke basa thaI gayuM !! eka ja vAkya mArA sAMbhaLavAmAM Avene, to huM samajI jauM ke kahevuM paDe A ! paNa evuM hoya nahIM ne ! vAkya zI rIte nIkaLe ?! vANI enI nIkaLe zI rIte ?! praznakartA : ApanuM kaheluM paNa jo paddhatisara kahetA hoya to ya bahu thaI gayuM. dAdAzrI : ahIM paddhatisara kahetA hoya to to sonuM kahevAya. 'vijJAta'mAM vAta ja samajavI rahI ! praznakartA : A puruSArthanI vAta bahu moTI vastu che. 'jJAna' pachI AptavANI-9 454 rahyuM A ja vastu ! dAdAzrI : A jhINI vAta badhAe samajelI nA hoya ne ! A to badhuM ThokAThoka cAlyA kare. keTalI badhI vAta jhINI hoya, paNa te jANeluM ja nA hoya ne ! sAMbhaLeluM ja nA hoya ne !! praznakartA : haju to 'mULa AtmA' AkAza jevo sUkSma, tyAM sudhI evI sUkSma vAtane pakaDavAnI che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, evI cIjane pakaDavAnI che. paNa bahu doDavAnI jarUra nahIM. peTa du:khe evuM doDavAnuM nahIM. vAta ja samajavAnI che. 'IjhIlI' sahaja rIte karavAnuM che. eTale vAta ja samajavAnI che, karavAnuM kazuM nathI. AvuM jhINuM kAMtavAnI darekanI IcchA hoya ja ne ! dhanavAna thavAnI kone icchA nA hoya ? A loka ATalA varSa bajAramAM zA hAru doDadhAma kare che ? A lakSmI mATe ja doDadhAma che ne, jagatanI ?! praznakartA : paNa ApanI pAse zabdAvalaMbanathI pachI pragatimAM caDhAya ne ? A zabdo pakaDI pakaDIne dhIme dhIme "mULa vastu' sudhI calAya ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. eTale paheluM AmAMthI ghUse dhIme dhIme ! A daravAjAmAMthI ghUse, pachI bIjA daravAjA sudhI javAya. paNa pahelA daravAjAmAM ghUsyo ja nA hoya, tene zuM thAya ? oLakhatAro ja pAme ! praznakartA : AvI jhINI vAta nIkaLe ne, tyAre ApanI oLakhANa bahu UMcI paDe che te vakhate, ApanI dazAnI bahu adbhutatA lAge, 'akrama vijJAna'nI ajAyabI lAge. dAdAzrI : badhAne oLakhANa samajAya nahIM. oLakhANa samajavuM e sahelI vAta che ?! oLakhANa samajaNa paDI ne, tene te rUpa thaI jAya. oLakhANa paDavuM sahelI vAta nathI ne ! hA, amAruM ApopuM gayeluM jene dekhAya che tene bahu moTI vAta samajAI. e 'ApopuM' samajI gayo.

Page #253
prAptisthAna) AptavANI-9 455 ApopuM gayuM, thayo paramAtmA ! have e ApopuM jAya kevI rIte ? ke e ApopuM jenuM gayuM hoya tenAM darzana karAvI daIe ke, e ja enI 'phITanesa'. bIjuM kazuM nahIM. praznakartA : darzana karavAthI ja paDe che ? dAdAzrI : darzana karavAthI badhuM ja thAya. Aje ja vAta nIkaLI. ApopuM zabda nIkaLyo che kaMI ? e to jyAre kaMI prakaraNa khulluM thAya tyAre 'opana' thAya. ane A ApopuM jAya, tenuM bhagavat calAvI le. potApaNuM jAya to bhagavat calAvI le. pachI zI bhAMjagaDa che, bolo. amAruM ApopuM cAlyuM gayuM, pachI bIjuM badhuM bhagavat calAvI le. mAre kyAM A badhI bhAMjagaDa che ?! heya, kRSNa bhagavAna ghoDA hAMkyA kare che. ApaNe to aMdara beThA beThA joyA karavAnuM. eTale bhagavAna kyAre saMbhALI leze ? e to ApopuM choDaze tyAre. tethI kRpALudeve kahyuM ne, ke bhagavatuM bhagavanuM saMbhALI leze paNa ApopuM choDaze to. ApopuM hoya tyAM sudhI bhagavAnanI javAbadArI nahIM. potApaNuM nA hoya tyAre bhagavAnanI javAbadArI. hA, 'phula' javAbadArI emanI ! ApopuM to jatAM ghaNo TAIma leze. A to bIjAM badhAM bahAranAM pADozIo joDe haju nikAla to karo. bAkI, ApopuM javuM ane bhagavAna thavuM emAM phera nathI. chevaTe 'amAruM' ApopuM gayuM eTale 'bhagavAne' mAthe bhAra lIdho. have amane bhAra nathI. amAruM ApopuM gayuM tyArathI bhAra emaNe mAthe lIdho. tyAre ja to ame A lahera karIe chIe ne ! ane A to evuM che ne, meM to ghaNA kALanuM karyuM hatuM ne tamane sahejamAM thAya che, eTale lAbha uThAvI levAno. chevaTe ApopuM jaze tyAre kAma thaze. paramAtmA' ane 'ApopuM javuM" e bemAM phera nathI. jo ApopuM gayuM tyAM paramAtmA sivAya bIjuM kazuM che nahIM. - jaya saccidAnaMda muMbaI : DaoN. nIrUbahena amIna 904-bI, navInaAzA epArTamenTa, dAdA sAheba phALake roDa, dAdara (se. 2.), muMbaI-4 %14 phona : (022) 41376 16, Pages : 9602-117283 amadAvAda : zrI dIpakabhAI desAI 1, varUNa epArTamenTa, 37, zrImALI sosAyaTI, navaraMgapurA, amadAvAda-380OOc, phona : (079) 642 1154, 463485 pheksa : 408528 E-Mail: dimple @adl.vsnl.net.in Madras : Dada Bhagwan Foundation Ajit C. Patel No. 9, Manohar Avenue, Egmore, Madras-600008. Tel : (044) 8261243, 8261369 Fax : 8261225 U.S.A. : Dada Bhagwan Vignan Institue Dr. Bachubhai Patel, 902 SW Mifflin Road, Topeka, Kansas 66606. Tel. : (913) 271-0869 Fax : (913) 271-8641 Dr. Shirish Patel 2659 Raven Circle, Corona, CA 91720 U.S.A. Tel. : (909) 734-4715. Fax : (909) 734-4411 : Shri Maganbhai Patel 2, Winifred Terrace, Enfield, Great Cambridge Road, London, Middlesex, ENI 1HH U.K. Tel : 181-245-1751 Mr. Ramesh Patel 636. Kenton Road, Kenton Harrow, London, Middlesex, HA3 9NR U.K. Tel. : 181-204-0746 Fax :181-907-4885 Canada : Shri Suryakant N. Patel 1497, Wilson Ave, Appt.#308, Downsview, Onterio, Toronto. M3M 1K2, CANADA. Tel. : (416) 247-8309. UK.